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It's Not About You: A Little Story About What Matters Most in Business
Please note that IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU has been revised and republished with a new title, THE GO-GIVER LEADER ( 9780399562945). We encourage you to search for THE GO-GIVER LEADER instead of the old edition.
127 pages, Hardcover
First published September 20, 2011
50 people are currently reading
1396 people want to read
About the author
Bob Burg
78 books335 followersBob Burg shares information on topics vital to the success of today’s businessperson. He speaks for corporations and associations internationally, including fortune 500 companies, franchises, and numerous direct sales organizations.
Bob is an advocate, supporter and defender of the Free Enterprise system, believing that the amount of money one makes is directly proportional to how many people they serve.
He is a founding board member of Club 100, a charitable organization focused on helping underprivileged local area youths. A lover of animals, he is a past member of the Board of Directors of Safe Harbor, which is the Humane Society of Jupiter, Florida.
Bob is an advocate, supporter and defender of the Free Enterprise system, believing that the amount of money one makes is directly proportional to how many people they serve.
He is a founding board member of Club 100, a charitable organization focused on helping underprivileged local area youths. A lover of animals, he is a past member of the Board of Directors of Safe Harbor, which is the Humane Society of Jupiter, Florida.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 115 reviews
June 5, 2020
This book, like the Go-Giver by the author, turns the matter of convincing on it's head. While it's a quick read, it takes much longer to think about the message.
February 14, 2022
HIGHLIGHTS:
1. Hold the Vision – Lead with your mind. Anyone can come up with a vision, the hard part is the holding. Building a business—building anything---is an act of faith.
- Keep seeing in your mind’s eye where it is you’re going, even when nobody else does, especially when nobody else does.
- Never forget where you came from. And watch your personal pronouns (“I/me / my”).
2. Build your People – Give people something good to live up to—something great—and they usually will.
- The more you yield, the more power you have.
- The substance of influence is pulling, not push. Tact is the language of strength. Don’t react, respond.
3. Do the Work – Lead from your gut. Know your pegs and shims. Stay hugely humble.
- Get mud on your boots. Stay grounded. Trust yourself.
- Just do the work.
- And not only because it needs doing, but also because that’s the only way you’ll generate real respect.
4. Stand for Something – Lead with your soul.
- What you have to give, you offer least of all through what you say; in greater part through what you do; but in the greatest part through who you are.
- Competence matters more.
- Character is what happens when life scratches itself onto your soul.
- You can lead only as far as you grow. And you will grow only as far as you let yourself. Character is a rare, precious gem, and anyone who possesses it is worth a great deal to the world around him. It’s the choices you make.
- How you choose to respond to what life throws at you. You are the steward of those dreams. The moment you begin thinking about yourself, that you’re the deal, is the moment you begin losing your capacity to positively influence others’ lives.
5. Share the Mantle – Let others lead. It’s not about you, it’s about them. Don’t get it backward: don’t start thinking you’re the deal.
- *The best way to increase your influence is to give it away.
- Sometimes it’s time to move to a bigger building.
6. The single biggest challenge to any organization is the constant cloud of fear and doubt that swirls around the heads of the people involved.
- As a leader, your job is to hold fast to the big picture.
7. You can’t run a tight operation unless your people trust you. Not the boardroom, not market research. You. And they wouldn’t unless you trust yourself.
8. The number one secret is giving. He also knew how to do the work.
9. Hugely humble. The more humble you are, the more personal power you have.
- *You can only be genuinely humble if you have enormous self-respect.
- Remember your muddy beginnings, and you can accomplish anything.
- People will only trust someone when they know where he stands. Vivid personal truth. People are not fools.
- No matter what front you put on, they will read you, consciously or unconsciously—the YOU behind the words.
10. Whatever great parenting looks like, it is not about the parent.
- Great teaching is not about the teacher.
- Great coaching isn’t about the coach.
1. Hold the Vision – Lead with your mind. Anyone can come up with a vision, the hard part is the holding. Building a business—building anything---is an act of faith.
- Keep seeing in your mind’s eye where it is you’re going, even when nobody else does, especially when nobody else does.
- Never forget where you came from. And watch your personal pronouns (“I/me / my”).
2. Build your People – Give people something good to live up to—something great—and they usually will.
- The more you yield, the more power you have.
- The substance of influence is pulling, not push. Tact is the language of strength. Don’t react, respond.
3. Do the Work – Lead from your gut. Know your pegs and shims. Stay hugely humble.
- Get mud on your boots. Stay grounded. Trust yourself.
- Just do the work.
- And not only because it needs doing, but also because that’s the only way you’ll generate real respect.
4. Stand for Something – Lead with your soul.
- What you have to give, you offer least of all through what you say; in greater part through what you do; but in the greatest part through who you are.
- Competence matters more.
- Character is what happens when life scratches itself onto your soul.
- You can lead only as far as you grow. And you will grow only as far as you let yourself. Character is a rare, precious gem, and anyone who possesses it is worth a great deal to the world around him. It’s the choices you make.
- How you choose to respond to what life throws at you. You are the steward of those dreams. The moment you begin thinking about yourself, that you’re the deal, is the moment you begin losing your capacity to positively influence others’ lives.
5. Share the Mantle – Let others lead. It’s not about you, it’s about them. Don’t get it backward: don’t start thinking you’re the deal.
- *The best way to increase your influence is to give it away.
- Sometimes it’s time to move to a bigger building.
6. The single biggest challenge to any organization is the constant cloud of fear and doubt that swirls around the heads of the people involved.
- As a leader, your job is to hold fast to the big picture.
7. You can’t run a tight operation unless your people trust you. Not the boardroom, not market research. You. And they wouldn’t unless you trust yourself.
8. The number one secret is giving. He also knew how to do the work.
9. Hugely humble. The more humble you are, the more personal power you have.
- *You can only be genuinely humble if you have enormous self-respect.
- Remember your muddy beginnings, and you can accomplish anything.
- People will only trust someone when they know where he stands. Vivid personal truth. People are not fools.
- No matter what front you put on, they will read you, consciously or unconsciously—the YOU behind the words.
10. Whatever great parenting looks like, it is not about the parent.
- Great teaching is not about the teacher.
- Great coaching isn’t about the coach.
June 5, 2020
This book, like the Go-Giver by the same author, turns the matter of convincing people on it's head. While it's a quick read, it takes much longer to think about the message.
September 17, 2015
I loved it. It made me choke up a little, even. The principal of finding abundance in life and business by serving the needs of others really does have a place in capitalist society. Stand out by being genuine.
July 31, 2021
Engaging short story about a merger & acquisition and all this process can teach you about humility, transition, selling, listening, asking questions, not judging people before you really get to know them and effective negotiation. The story is a pleasant way to learn and reinforce some important pearls of wisdom. I like how each chapter and the book ends with a leadership manifesto list of “do’s”.
Read
August 17, 2013I really enjoyed this business book for several reasons:
1. It is short and succinct, just 118 pages
2. The business advice is embedded within the narrative, which is a memorable parable
3. The take-aways are summarized at the end of each chapter and at the end of the book
I suspect that many business tomes are never read cover-to-cover, because reading through pages of dense text in "business speak" can just bore you into a coma (and having read many of those during my MBA courses, I speak from great experience !) "It's Not About You" is quite different though - you will not be able to put it down until you've turned the last page.
The story-line is that Ben, recently promoted into the Mergers & Acquisitions group, is given a short period of time to convince the principals of an old family run business to agree to be acquired. He attacks the challenge with a view to getting them to see things his way. While meeting with his friend Claire for advice, he also meets Aunt Elle. He tries to dismiss her as a curious old woman, but she starts to ask probing questions that cause him to rethink his approach to the challenge. She taught him that pull is the substance of influence - not push; and that the less you say the more influence you'll have; tact is the language of strength; place other people's interests first; the more humble you are the more personal power you have.
There's a nice surprise finish to the book. You really don't know until the final pages whether the merger will go through. The business lessons were driven home by the parable in a very compelling way. The message of the tale resonates, and will definitely help you to remember the lessons learned
1. It is short and succinct, just 118 pages
2. The business advice is embedded within the narrative, which is a memorable parable
3. The take-aways are summarized at the end of each chapter and at the end of the book
I suspect that many business tomes are never read cover-to-cover, because reading through pages of dense text in "business speak" can just bore you into a coma (and having read many of those during my MBA courses, I speak from great experience !) "It's Not About You" is quite different though - you will not be able to put it down until you've turned the last page.
The story-line is that Ben, recently promoted into the Mergers & Acquisitions group, is given a short period of time to convince the principals of an old family run business to agree to be acquired. He attacks the challenge with a view to getting them to see things his way. While meeting with his friend Claire for advice, he also meets Aunt Elle. He tries to dismiss her as a curious old woman, but she starts to ask probing questions that cause him to rethink his approach to the challenge. She taught him that pull is the substance of influence - not push; and that the less you say the more influence you'll have; tact is the language of strength; place other people's interests first; the more humble you are the more personal power you have.
There's a nice surprise finish to the book. You really don't know until the final pages whether the merger will go through. The business lessons were driven home by the parable in a very compelling way. The message of the tale resonates, and will definitely help you to remember the lessons learned
September 24, 2011
Wow, what a fantastic book, "It's Not About You". I literally could not stop reading this book. As you can see, I read it in one day. This book is so intriguing and I sure would love to have my own business and apply the principles taught in this book.
The authors, Bob Burg and John David Mann, developed Ben's Keys to Legendary Leadership. I believe that Ben's wife, Melanie, in the story was referring to the car keys "but" it was the Keys of Ben's Manifesto.
Key #1 Hold the Vision
Key #2 Build Your People
Key #3 Do the Work
Key #4 Stand for Something
Key #5 Share the Mantle
This book should be read by all management and employees of businesses worldwide. Then they should apply Ben's Keys to Legendary Leadership to their companies. The companies doing these principles would grow.
Bob Burg speaks to corporations and organizations worldwide on topics at the core of "The Go-Giver" and "It's Not About You". I would definitely give him a call to come and speak.
John David Mann has been writing about business, leadership, and the laws of success for twenty-five years. I am impressed at all of his qualifications and knowledge.
"You" can get copies a discounted prices for your business, sales organization, school, nonprofit, or house of worship. If I had a business I would apply these principles with my employees.
Yes, I received this book free from Goodreads "but" I really did not win it, it just showed up in my mailbox yesterday. LuCKY me (YOU)!
The authors, Bob Burg and John David Mann, developed Ben's Keys to Legendary Leadership. I believe that Ben's wife, Melanie, in the story was referring to the car keys "but" it was the Keys of Ben's Manifesto.
Key #1 Hold the Vision
Key #2 Build Your People
Key #3 Do the Work
Key #4 Stand for Something
Key #5 Share the Mantle
This book should be read by all management and employees of businesses worldwide. Then they should apply Ben's Keys to Legendary Leadership to their companies. The companies doing these principles would grow.
Bob Burg speaks to corporations and organizations worldwide on topics at the core of "The Go-Giver" and "It's Not About You". I would definitely give him a call to come and speak.
John David Mann has been writing about business, leadership, and the laws of success for twenty-five years. I am impressed at all of his qualifications and knowledge.
"You" can get copies a discounted prices for your business, sales organization, school, nonprofit, or house of worship. If I had a business I would apply these principles with my employees.
Yes, I received this book free from Goodreads "but" I really did not win it, it just showed up in my mailbox yesterday. LuCKY me (YOU)!
August 23, 2011
I won an ARC copy of this book on Goodreads. It's a story, with a lesson behind it. Ben is a young manager who has just been promoted to the Mergers and Acquisitions department of a large company. It is his job to convince 500 people that the merger is a good idea. Going into the merger he has a idea of how to get the job done, but after meeting an eccentric old lady he learns valuable lessons in being a good leader.
Good story line. Quick read. Good for anyone in a leadership position.
Good story line. Quick read. Good for anyone in a leadership position.
September 7, 2016
Absolutely a keeper - highly recommend reading & rereading! Fabulously put together - towards the end of the book I couldn't put it down. Abundance is for those that understand the concept of service before self.
January 20, 2012
There is nothing really insightful or substantive here. Aunty Zen provides some banal business advice in a coffee shop, while Ben tries to close an M&A deal. Don't waste your money.
August 19, 2012
30th book read in 2012.
Number 235 out of 262 on my all time book list.
Follow the link below to see my video review:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V832aP...
Number 235 out of 262 on my all time book list.
Follow the link below to see my video review:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V832aP...
February 5, 2014
Brilliant work by Bob Burg. A great book on leadership with one example to show some of us.. "It's Not About You" :)
July 2, 2018
Keys to Legendary Leadership:
Hold The Vision
Lead with your mind.
Anyone can come up with a vision. The hard part is holding it.
Building a business - building anything - is an act of faith.
Keep seeing in your mind's eye where it is you're going, even when nobody else does. Especially when nobody else does.
Never forget where you came from.
And watch your personal pronouns.
Build Your People
Lead from the heart.
Give people something good to live up to – something great – and they usually will
The more you yield, the more power you have.
The substance of influence is pull…. not push.
Tact is the language of strength.
And don’t react—respond.
Do The Work
Lead from your gut.
Know your pegs and shims. - I'll actually comment on this one. It means to understand your business. When you open your mouth to talk about something, make sure you know what you are talking about.
Stay hugely humble.
Get mud on your boots. - I'll also comment on this one. Don't be afraid to do some work. It is one thing to read about something. It is another thing to actually try and do it.
Stay grounded.
And trust yourself.
Stand For Something
Lead with your soul.
What you have to give you offer least of all through what you say; in greater part through what you do; but in greatest part through what you are.
Competence matters. Character matters more.
Character is what happens when life scratches itself onto your soul.
You can lead only as far as you grow. And you will grow only as far as you let yourself.
Share The Mantle
Let other’s lead.
It’s not about you… It’s about them.
Don’t’ get it backward: don’t start thinking you’re the deal.
The best way to increase your influence is to give it away.
Sometimes it’s time to move to a bigger building.
Hold The Vision
Lead with your mind.
Anyone can come up with a vision. The hard part is holding it.
Building a business - building anything - is an act of faith.
Keep seeing in your mind's eye where it is you're going, even when nobody else does. Especially when nobody else does.
Never forget where you came from.
And watch your personal pronouns.
Build Your People
Lead from the heart.
Give people something good to live up to – something great – and they usually will
The more you yield, the more power you have.
The substance of influence is pull…. not push.
Tact is the language of strength.
And don’t react—respond.
Do The Work
Lead from your gut.
Know your pegs and shims. - I'll actually comment on this one. It means to understand your business. When you open your mouth to talk about something, make sure you know what you are talking about.
Stay hugely humble.
Get mud on your boots. - I'll also comment on this one. Don't be afraid to do some work. It is one thing to read about something. It is another thing to actually try and do it.
Stay grounded.
And trust yourself.
Stand For Something
Lead with your soul.
What you have to give you offer least of all through what you say; in greater part through what you do; but in greatest part through what you are.
Competence matters. Character matters more.
Character is what happens when life scratches itself onto your soul.
You can lead only as far as you grow. And you will grow only as far as you let yourself.
Share The Mantle
Let other’s lead.
It’s not about you… It’s about them.
Don’t’ get it backward: don’t start thinking you’re the deal.
The best way to increase your influence is to give it away.
Sometimes it’s time to move to a bigger building.
August 28, 2021
Book 73 Completed😊: It’s Not About You –Bob Burg & John David Mann #myread4change #read2lead #read4life #books
It’s not about you is small engaging business parable that emphasis the power of giving, thinking in terms of what we can offer rather than what’s in it for me.
Story revolves around Senior Manager Ben representing a big firm, which is in process of taking over well-known company. Ben is responsible for convincing the board and employees of the company to be taken over to vote for it.
In the process of understanding their history, how they conduct business and meeting key people, he consults with his friend Claire, where he ends up with meeting Claire’s Aunt in the same meeting they engaged in interesting dialogue about merger.
Few 🔑 Points –
• What you must give, you offer least of all through what you say; in greater part through what you do; but in greatest part through who you are.
• It’s easy to inspire and motivate people—for the moment. It’s easy to say, ‘Hold a vision’. Anyone can come up with a vision. The hard part is the holding.
• Keep seeing in your mind’s eye where it is you’re going, even when nobody else does. Especially when nobody else does.
• If you had all the information, there’d be nothing to it. But sometimes you must decide, even when you don’t have all the information.
Few 📌 Quotes –
1. Your influence is determined by how abundantly you place other people’s interests first.
2. If you want to be hugely successful, you must stay hugely humble.
3. Self-respect is where every other kind of respect comes from. Respect from others is a reflection, not the source.
4. You can lead only as far as you grow. And you will grow only as far as you let yourself.
It’s not about you is small engaging business parable that emphasis the power of giving, thinking in terms of what we can offer rather than what’s in it for me.
Story revolves around Senior Manager Ben representing a big firm, which is in process of taking over well-known company. Ben is responsible for convincing the board and employees of the company to be taken over to vote for it.
In the process of understanding their history, how they conduct business and meeting key people, he consults with his friend Claire, where he ends up with meeting Claire’s Aunt in the same meeting they engaged in interesting dialogue about merger.
Few 🔑 Points –
• What you must give, you offer least of all through what you say; in greater part through what you do; but in greatest part through who you are.
• It’s easy to inspire and motivate people—for the moment. It’s easy to say, ‘Hold a vision’. Anyone can come up with a vision. The hard part is the holding.
• Keep seeing in your mind’s eye where it is you’re going, even when nobody else does. Especially when nobody else does.
• If you had all the information, there’d be nothing to it. But sometimes you must decide, even when you don’t have all the information.
Few 📌 Quotes –
1. Your influence is determined by how abundantly you place other people’s interests first.
2. If you want to be hugely successful, you must stay hugely humble.
3. Self-respect is where every other kind of respect comes from. Respect from others is a reflection, not the source.
4. You can lead only as far as you grow. And you will grow only as far as you let yourself.
January 1, 2018
I've actually had this audio book for quite a while. When I first bought it, I didn't realize it was written in story form and was expecting something completely different. I set it aside and had, quite honestly, forgotten all about it. Going through my library the other day, I ran across this title and, having forgotten again the style of writing, started listening to it. For whatever reason, this time it sparked something in me that it didn't before.
There isn't anything earth,shatteringly new in this book. But the principles it lays out are sound. And the "novel" approach (pun intended) is enjoyable. I especially like the audio version. It's read by both authors alternating chapters which seems a bit risky at first from a continuity standpoint, but actually works well. Another big plus is they both read well. Not every author should self narrate.
The characters are interesting, as is the plot. There are several nice twists and turns. I enjoyed seeing the main character grow through the book, and seeing the "real life" application of the principles he learned in the story.
I didn't expect to like this book but was pleasantly surprised. I found it a nice change of pace from the typical advice books I usually read. I mostly listened to it during my commute, but when I was close to the end, I listened to the final chapters before I went to bed because I really wanted to see how it would turn out. I actually cared about the characters.
Definitely a worthwhile read/ listen with some good principles on relationships.
There isn't anything earth,shatteringly new in this book. But the principles it lays out are sound. And the "novel" approach (pun intended) is enjoyable. I especially like the audio version. It's read by both authors alternating chapters which seems a bit risky at first from a continuity standpoint, but actually works well. Another big plus is they both read well. Not every author should self narrate.
The characters are interesting, as is the plot. There are several nice twists and turns. I enjoyed seeing the main character grow through the book, and seeing the "real life" application of the principles he learned in the story.
I didn't expect to like this book but was pleasantly surprised. I found it a nice change of pace from the typical advice books I usually read. I mostly listened to it during my commute, but when I was close to the end, I listened to the final chapters before I went to bed because I really wanted to see how it would turn out. I actually cared about the characters.
Definitely a worthwhile read/ listen with some good principles on relationships.
April 8, 2019
Ever since the Goal [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Goa...] came out in 1984, delivering management training via a story became a trend. And rightfully so. The sprouting workshops, books, and blogs about storytelling support and validate the value of the method. After all, all teaching started with storytelling.
It’s Not About You does a fairly good job at it. sadly, all the characters other than the main one come across better, more self-aware. Ben’s thickness is annoying at times, too thick.
And yet, I like the book. A lot. And recommend is to Sales, BD, PMs, and other business leaders. There’s more than enough to take away from the book, keep, and use!
Most important takeaways:
Listen
RESPOND, don’t react
Always ask yourself what do I have to offer
It’s Not About You does a fairly good job at it. sadly, all the characters other than the main one come across better, more self-aware. Ben’s thickness is annoying at times, too thick.
And yet, I like the book. A lot. And recommend is to Sales, BD, PMs, and other business leaders. There’s more than enough to take away from the book, keep, and use!
Most important takeaways:
Listen
RESPOND, don’t react
Always ask yourself what do I have to offer
February 7, 2016
It’s Not About You : More than a Business Story
It was a great pleasure to read The Go-Giver by Bob Burg and John David Mann three years back. The book conveyed Five Principles of Stratospheric Success. The book was marvelous and reminded us of the principles which we all knew but somehow thought were not relevant in today’s cut-throat competition where one need to be go-getter. I posted My Blogpost about the Book three years back on my blog. The book had a great impact and when I knew these wonderful authors are coming up with thier new book, I was very excited to read it.
After waiting for 15 days, it was here. In my hand, my own copy of “It’s Not About You“. The title of book is “It’s Not About You : A Little Story About What Matters Most in Business”, but it should be “A Little Story About What Matters Most in Life”. Yes, the title of book says it all, Business as well as Life is not about you. Not about leader, its about others. It’s about People around you and that’s what we miss by being go-getter.
Although book gives principles of leadership in form of ‘Ben’s Menifesto’, but I consider it a book which goes beyond words. Rather than just giving some principles of leadership, it gives a new concept about leadership, a new way to look at leadership. So dont get caught in the principles, look at the broader concept these principles try to highlight. As Osho said “When I point my finger to moon, dont look at my finger, look at moon. My finger is not moon.”
Earlier with ‘The Go Giver‘ and now with ‘It’s Not About You‘, Bob and John are sharing with all of us a new way of living. For Example, Ben learned about ‘Influence’:
“The best way to increase your influence is to give it away.“
“The Substance of influence is pull…… not push.“
“Your influence is determined by how abundantly you place other people’s interests first.”
“The moment you begin thinking that it’s all about you, that you’re the deal, is the moment you begin losing your capacity to positively influence others’ lives.”
As in their last book, they are highlighting the principles which are so obvious yet so overlooked. This time also they tell it through such an engaging story that it conveys their ideas beyond the words. The story is illustrated in such a narrative way that you feel you are there with Ben and you want to see him succeed. That’s the most important thing about this book, when you feel like being part of the story, you get the principles beyond just words, you get the whole concept. Bob and John are master story tellers. It is a perfect story with all emotions that keeps you involved yet never loses its way in conveying the very essentials. Ben’s conversation with his son ‘Robbie’, his visit to Phoebe’s Grand Mother, Aunt Elle asking Ben if he has lost someone, there are numerous places where you will feel its more than a management book, its about Life.
There is a lot I can write about this book, but as I said, this book tries to convey something beyond words and I will not be able to convey much unless you read it yourself. Before I leave you with some of my favourite parts of this book, I will Congratulate My Great Friends Bob and John for again writing such a master piece. I will suggest you read it yourself, not any summary, the whole book from first page to last, if possible more than once. Again when you read, Dont get caught in Principles of Leadership, look at the bigger picture these principles are pointing to. Dont look at the finger, look at the moon.
Some of My Favourite Parts of Book:
“The Less you say, the more influence you’ll have.”
“The hard part isn’t the vision. Anyone can come up with a vision. The part is the holding. As a leader, your job is to hold fast to the big picture, to keep seeing in your mind’s eye, with crystal clarity, where it is you’re going-that place that right at this moment exists only in your mind’s eye. And to keep seeing that, even when nobody else does….. Especially when nobody else does”
“Give people something goog to live up to – something great – and they usually will. In fact, often they’ll even exceed those expectations.”
“You don’t have to be brilliant. The brilliant will take care of itself. You just need to do the work. And not only because it needs doing, but also because that’s the only way you’ll generate real respect.”
“Self respect is where every other kind of respect comes from. Respect from others is a reflection, not the source.”
“People will only trust someone when they know where he stands. Where do you stand? And what do you stand for?”
“Life leaves a mark. None of us passes through the experiece of our days unblemished or pristine. We all suffer tragedies and disappointments, struggles and failures. Losses great and small, and every one of them hurts. We can try to cover it up, although if we do, we just tend to grow bitter on the inside. Or, we can embrace who we are – that is, who we are in the process of becoming. Embrace the hurt and it deepens you, makes you a richer person. Deny, reject, hold it at bat, fight it off, and it simply hardens you. Either way, it engraves itself onto your soul.”
“Whatever great parenting looks like, it is not about the parent. Great teaching is not about the teacher. Great coaching is not about the coach. And great leadership is not about …………”
It was a great pleasure to read The Go-Giver by Bob Burg and John David Mann three years back. The book conveyed Five Principles of Stratospheric Success. The book was marvelous and reminded us of the principles which we all knew but somehow thought were not relevant in today’s cut-throat competition where one need to be go-getter. I posted My Blogpost about the Book three years back on my blog. The book had a great impact and when I knew these wonderful authors are coming up with thier new book, I was very excited to read it.
After waiting for 15 days, it was here. In my hand, my own copy of “It’s Not About You“. The title of book is “It’s Not About You : A Little Story About What Matters Most in Business”, but it should be “A Little Story About What Matters Most in Life”. Yes, the title of book says it all, Business as well as Life is not about you. Not about leader, its about others. It’s about People around you and that’s what we miss by being go-getter.
Although book gives principles of leadership in form of ‘Ben’s Menifesto’, but I consider it a book which goes beyond words. Rather than just giving some principles of leadership, it gives a new concept about leadership, a new way to look at leadership. So dont get caught in the principles, look at the broader concept these principles try to highlight. As Osho said “When I point my finger to moon, dont look at my finger, look at moon. My finger is not moon.”
Earlier with ‘The Go Giver‘ and now with ‘It’s Not About You‘, Bob and John are sharing with all of us a new way of living. For Example, Ben learned about ‘Influence’:
“The best way to increase your influence is to give it away.“
“The Substance of influence is pull…… not push.“
“Your influence is determined by how abundantly you place other people’s interests first.”
“The moment you begin thinking that it’s all about you, that you’re the deal, is the moment you begin losing your capacity to positively influence others’ lives.”
As in their last book, they are highlighting the principles which are so obvious yet so overlooked. This time also they tell it through such an engaging story that it conveys their ideas beyond the words. The story is illustrated in such a narrative way that you feel you are there with Ben and you want to see him succeed. That’s the most important thing about this book, when you feel like being part of the story, you get the principles beyond just words, you get the whole concept. Bob and John are master story tellers. It is a perfect story with all emotions that keeps you involved yet never loses its way in conveying the very essentials. Ben’s conversation with his son ‘Robbie’, his visit to Phoebe’s Grand Mother, Aunt Elle asking Ben if he has lost someone, there are numerous places where you will feel its more than a management book, its about Life.
There is a lot I can write about this book, but as I said, this book tries to convey something beyond words and I will not be able to convey much unless you read it yourself. Before I leave you with some of my favourite parts of this book, I will Congratulate My Great Friends Bob and John for again writing such a master piece. I will suggest you read it yourself, not any summary, the whole book from first page to last, if possible more than once. Again when you read, Dont get caught in Principles of Leadership, look at the bigger picture these principles are pointing to. Dont look at the finger, look at the moon.
Some of My Favourite Parts of Book:
“The Less you say, the more influence you’ll have.”
“The hard part isn’t the vision. Anyone can come up with a vision. The part is the holding. As a leader, your job is to hold fast to the big picture, to keep seeing in your mind’s eye, with crystal clarity, where it is you’re going-that place that right at this moment exists only in your mind’s eye. And to keep seeing that, even when nobody else does….. Especially when nobody else does”
“Give people something goog to live up to – something great – and they usually will. In fact, often they’ll even exceed those expectations.”
“You don’t have to be brilliant. The brilliant will take care of itself. You just need to do the work. And not only because it needs doing, but also because that’s the only way you’ll generate real respect.”
“Self respect is where every other kind of respect comes from. Respect from others is a reflection, not the source.”
“People will only trust someone when they know where he stands. Where do you stand? And what do you stand for?”
“Life leaves a mark. None of us passes through the experiece of our days unblemished or pristine. We all suffer tragedies and disappointments, struggles and failures. Losses great and small, and every one of them hurts. We can try to cover it up, although if we do, we just tend to grow bitter on the inside. Or, we can embrace who we are – that is, who we are in the process of becoming. Embrace the hurt and it deepens you, makes you a richer person. Deny, reject, hold it at bat, fight it off, and it simply hardens you. Either way, it engraves itself onto your soul.”
“Whatever great parenting looks like, it is not about the parent. Great teaching is not about the teacher. Great coaching is not about the coach. And great leadership is not about …………”
August 25, 2017
A cute little story about how to succeed in business and life. Ben learns lots of life lessons as he tries to negotiate his first merger. There are numerous quips and bullet pointed concepts here, wrapped up in a story about real life situations and issues. This is a decent tale about being open to learning better approaches in business and personal endeavors.
January 9, 2018
I have read quite a few business self help books but this one was one of the best. If you work with people as a manager, in a sales capacity, human resources you need to read this book. It takes a step back to take away all the data and statistics of closing a deal and humanizes it. The story has life lessons in it that can be utilized in various applications.
June 5, 2020
Book is so engrossing that I read it without much pause. It's book of wisdom written in a story form. Beautifully written Book, I naturally started connecting with characters Ben & Aunt Elle . I believe this book is meant for all those who are holding leadership position , those who aspire to Lead, those who are influencing organization as Consultant, coach.
March 26, 2024
This is a short, little book that gives short, succinct rules for the best leadership skills. Told as short story and interspersed with golden nuggets of gold truth, it would be a great read for a business person, business owner, graduating students and those who aim to guide and encourage their teams along the way to success.
September 24, 2019
They did it again! An incredible storytelling approach to teach some fundamental aspect of true leadership. What I liked the most is observing the main character growth and total transformation throughout the story. It's a quick read but with a large ROI.
February 8, 2020
Amazing business tips
A simple story that has embedded in it strong lessons that any business leader should adapt. What matters most has a very different approach that this boom displays towards success in leadership and skills one needs in the process.
A simple story that has embedded in it strong lessons that any business leader should adapt. What matters most has a very different approach that this boom displays towards success in leadership and skills one needs in the process.
January 17, 2018
Short book full of business tips wound around an interesting story. Summary of tips emphasized at the end of each chapter and at the end of the book.
February 8, 2018
This book really gets you thinking!!
June 8, 2019
Loved this from one of the authors of the Go-Giver. Great business read and a refreshing view on integrity and leadership
October 16, 2019
Another book by Bob Burg and John Mann. I enjoy their writing style. They tell feel-good stories with subject matter that is easy to follow and easy to learn.
April 16, 2020
Another outstanding Bob Burg and David Mann book demonstrating that the relationships you build on a know, like, and trust foundation brings greater than imagined results.
June 4, 2020
One of the most enjoyable books I've ever read.
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June 29, 2020It is not about you it about them. Great book.
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