Slim and None

by Dan Jenkins

Introduced in Dan Jenkins’s previous uproarious novel of the pro golf tour, The Money-Whipped Steer-Job Three-Jack Give-Up Artist , Bobby Joe Grooves is now forty-four and still without a win in a major championship. A student of golf lore, Bobby Joe is well aware that only a small group of stars have ever won a major at his age or older, and among them are such immortals as Nicklaus, Boros, Irwin, and Trevino. It’s now or never for Bobby Joe, and excuse him for thinking that his chances are slim and none.

So it’s off to the Masters, U.S. Open, British Open, and the rest of the PGA Tour for Bobby Joe, who’s leaving behind the prospect of a third ex-wife. On the golf courses he’ll face familiar competitors such as Knut Thorssun and Cheetah Farmer, but the rival who may loom the largest is the game’s newest child star, nineteen-year-old Scott Pritchard. His talents are the talk of the Tour—so is his arrogance—and so, by the way, is his stunning mom, Gwendolyn, a shapely adorable woman who captures Bobby Joe’s full attention and threatens not to let go.

Long revered by his peers as one of the world’s best sportswriters, and beloved by readers for such classics as Semi-Tough and Dead Solid Perfect , Dan Jenkins is at the top of his form in Slim and None . It’s packed with authentic insider gems about each of the majors and hilarious sketches of many of the characters—touring pros, officials, media, agents, caddies, and ladies—who inhabit this outrageous and endearing world of sports.

Genres: Sports, Fiction, Humor, Novels, Comedy

243 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2005

About the author

Dan Jenkins was an American author and sportswriter, most notably for Sports Illustrated.

Jenkins was born and raised in Fort Worth, Texas, where he attended R.L. Paschal High School and Texas Christian University (TCU), where he played on the varsity golf team. Jenkins worked for many publications including the Fort Worth Press, Dallas Times Herald, Playboy, and Sports Illustrated. In 1985 he retired from Sports Illustrated and began writing books full-time and maintained a monthly column in Golf Digest magazine.

Larry King called Jenkins "the quintessential Sports Illustrated writer" and "the best sportswriter in America." Jenkins authored numerous works and over 500 articles for Sports Illustrated. In 1972, Jenkins wrote his first novel, Semi-Tough.

His daughter, Sally Jenkins, is a sports columnist for the Washington Post.

Reviews

[Dave · Rating 3 out of 5]

Dan Jenkins' novels have a schtick—or maybe a pattern. Texas at the center, golf as a key diversion, politically incorrect renderings of history spiked with casual racism, insider's view of journalism and or sports, and a romance running its course while infidelity swirls around the edges—punch all that into the ChatGPT thing and see if it spits out something in the neighborhood.

I won't deny Jenkins' biting humor and his knowledge of journalism and sports, particularly golf and college football. His other novels do more for me than this one, so maybe I've evolved to where I can't accept the racist cracks any more. Strip away that bunch of humor and you still have a compelling story to tell. Boy plays golf for a living, unlucky in love and on the course, zero major championships and three ex-wives, and all that might change sooner rather than later. No need to bog it down with racial slurs and revisionist history.

Jenkins left us with an impressive body of work and you can't go wrong with any of them, honestly. His love of Texas and sports comes through in his writing, but I'd skip this one until you've read 'em all.

[Biff · Rating 3 out of 5]

The late Dan Jenkins certainly seemed to have fun when he wrote a novel, and this book is no exception. I had the Google App on my phone so I could look up some of the golfers in the early part of the 20th Century that the hero, Bobby Joe Grooves, mentions. Jenkins mixes in some interesting characters from the past with down-home good ol boy golfers, who have down-home names as well.

A fun read for most folks who enjoy the game and enjoy a good laugh,

[Daniel · Rating 4 out of 5]

A good read. Great lines and the book flows through a professional golfer's season of majors. Nothing heavy duty just the type of a "relax read". But if golf is at all a passion/hobby for you and you are familiar with the terms and slang, you will enjoy this book. RIP Mr Jenkins. your articles and books will keep golfers entertained.

[bruce smith · Rating 4 out of 5]

Jenkins at his best

Only the seminal SEMI TOUGH out ranks Slim and None. Bobby Joe Grooves noses out Kenny Lee Puckett on the last hole of sudden death. Jenkins' characters never vary much from his Fort Worth roots but there is no reason to mess with perfection. The only sad thing is I've read all of his books and there aren't anymore coming.

[Bill Linton · Rating 3 out of 5]

This a fun book with a good inside look at the game of golf. Jenkins is crude and irreverent; I am ashamed that at laughed at some his high school locker room humor, but it was funny. If you are easily offended my misogyny, steer clear of this one.

[Dennis Osborne · Rating 4 out of 5]

Jenkins is always fun to read. Kept a smile on my face the whole time

[Chris Hall · Rating 4 out of 5]

A thoroughly fun read about sad sack golfer Bobby Joe Grooves, his troubles with golf officials and women.

If you are a golf fan, you will enjoy this book.

[Brandon · Rating 3 out of 5]

Funny lines and a good story.

[Bob Box · Rating 3 out of 5]

Read in 2005. Jenkins focuses on the Lady's Golf Tour in this outing.

[Ted · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book should be read only in a "man cave." Filled with crazy, zany, frat-boy, sports-talk language, I laughed out loud all the way through. But, Jenkins is hardly politically correct; so much so that this book would now be banned at Yale (given today's politically correct sensibilities). If you liked Jenkins' earlier work a couple of decades ago, "Semi-Tough" (the book or the movie with Burt Reynolds), you will be entertained. Golfers will enjoy a history of the four major tournaments and the detailed descriptions of the principal courses skillfully interwoven into the nutty plot.

[Jim · Rating 4 out of 5]

The history go the PGA wrapped in an infatuation with an adorable shapely and the "Best In Show" insanity of the pro sports world, all told with the Jenkins flair for snarky humor. Now you DO have to be at least mildly interested in golf to get through this, but Jenkins is so much fun to read even anti-golfers may be able to handle it.

[Hayden · Rating 4 out of 5]

Another solid Jenkins book that acts like a story about golf.

[Phil · Rating 5 out of 5]

I wasn't sure when reading the first couple pages, but I got into it and really enjoyed this book! Highly Recommended!

[Roger Anderson · Rating 2 out of 5]

Typical Dan Jenkins effort. the humor was pretty heavy handed at times but the descriptions of the golf courses and shots made it worth while reading the book.