Good Riddance: An Illustrated Memoir of Divorce

by Cynthia L. Copeland

When you think you live in a Norman Rockwell painting—married 18 years, three kids, beautiful old house in the country, successful career as a writer—you don’t expect there’s another side to the canvas. Until you read a lovesick e-mail to your husband . . . that didn’t come from you!
Good Riddance is an honest and funny graphic memoir about suffering through and surviving divorce. Cynthia Copeland chronicles the deep pain, confusion, awkwardness, and breakthroughs she experiences in the “new normal” as a wife who’s been deceived, a mom who’s now single, a divorcée who’s dating, and a woman who’s on her own figuring out what she truly wants from her life. Copeland tells her story with an emotional candor and spot-on humor that makes Good Riddance poignant, painful, and hilarious all at once.

Praise for Good Riddance:

“Copeland’s light-hearted and comical artwork, reminiscent of Roz Chast’s, takes some of the sting out of her sorrows, allowing readers to nod in sympathy or chuckle at her missteps.”  —Publishers Weekly

"Even as she tells a story that is sometimes heartbreaking, Copeland has a way of making you laugh out loud.  Full of insight about family, friendship, love, and resilience, Good Riddance is essential reading for anyone who has ever gone through a divorce."
-- J. Courtney Sullivan, New York Times bestselling author of Maine and Commencement

"Copeland takes us gently through a tough chronicle of divorce with wit, humor and more than a little hope."
-- Phoebe Potts, author of Good Eggs

"For anyone who's ever been dumped and had to start over, this charming book should be required reading. Grab a glass (ok, bottle) of wine and settle in. There's a light at the end of your tunnel and it starts with Good Riddance."
-- Jill Smokler, New York Times bestselling author

“Copeland has a charming art style . . . and because of her experience in the self-help/instructional publishing field, she brings a welcome specificity to the subject. Good Riddance isn’t a rant against cheating spouses; it’s more a step-by-step breakdown on how it feels to have a comfortable life upended overnight.” – The A.V. Club

“I was struck by a page on which Copeland sends her youngest off for his first overnight in the home of T.J. and his new wife. The author-artist uses just a few words and images to convey an entire world of maternal despair. Copeland and other ‘graphic memoirists’ have me convinced that illustrated books—unlike Trix®—aren’t just for kids anymore.” —AARP.com

“Works such as Copeland’s deserve your attention even if you aren’t married or divorced, because the human experience can be entertaining and moving.”—ComicMix
 


 

Genres: Graphic Novels, Comics, Memoir, Nonfiction, Graphic Novels Comics, Biography Memoir, Biography

224 pages, Paperback

First published May 1, 2013

Reviews

[Melki · Rating 4 out of 5]

Cynthia Copeland basically had four children - three that she had given birth to, and one immature husband who treated the kids like playmates. Nevertheless, they had a happy marriage. Or, at least SHE thought they did . . . Then one day, Copeland's search for a recipe folder lead to the accidental discovery of her husband's infidelity in the form of emails - lots of them. His nonchalant attitude when she confronted him led Copeland to realize that her 18 year "happy" marriage was over.

At least she was able to create this rather charming, and frequently touching memoir. We spend a year watching her go through a variety of emotions, and facing a number of crises - including what to do with herself while the kids are with the ex, to reentering the dating game. And, somehow, she manages to make this sad subject funny. Some of her observations, and quips are perfect. After her husband began dating in earnest, Copeland confessed to being dismayed that these "new girlfriends were reaping the benefits of decades of my delicate yet persistent husband tweaking."

I felt like I was giving away a puppy right after it learned to go outside.

This was an unusual subject for a graphic novel, and a unique look at the dissolution of a modern American marriage.

[Hal Johnson · Rating 2 out of 5]

If you ever get the urge to write a graphic memoir of your divorce, don't do it. And if you ever feel the need to put a double-page spread of your reaction to 9/11 in that graphic memoir, don't do that either. I can't stress this enough.

This book is probably as good as a book about a subject that is literally only of interest to the author and her family can be. There are a couple of funny parts, such as the author's gripes about the amusing bad dates she goes on; but when she ridicules a date for publishing a book of poetry about his cat, this may sound just -- IF SHE WAS NOT HERSELF WRITING A GRAPHIC MEMOIR ABOUT HER DIVORCE. It may be hard to decide who's the worse date, there.

The book is less bitter than the title.

[Kirsti · Rating 4 out of 5]

I decided to read this because of the bad reviews, which I suspected I would disagree with, and I was right.

The author is too self-centered? This is a memoir.

She is sometimes nasty? She is a human being who went through a rotten experience. Not the worst experience anyone has ever gone through, but a miserable and destabilizing time.

She sometimes mentions personal information about others? So what? She waited many years to publish and changed all the names and some identifying details.

You don't think she's nice enough? Since when do authors need to be nice? All they need to be is interesting and thought provoking.

I actually liked the somewhat bitchy portrayals of others because otherwise she would have seemed too much like a martyr. She makes mistakes and doubts herself and changes her mind about things. And you can tell that she really loves the kids for themselves and not as a reflection of her.

Sure, some of this seems dated and insular. (She worries about keeping up with the Christmas cards? Really? She doesn't mention getting tested for STDs right away? Really??) But this is a thoughtful portrait of divorce at a certain time, place, and income level. It was worth my time, and it might be worth yours, too.

[Rachel · Rating 3 out of 5]

I could definitely relate to this book, having been through an unexpected divorce after a long marriage that I thought was good. The author tells it like it was, with as little resentment as she can manage (was that for real? was the mild stalking the worst she did?). She had the perfect Norman Rockwell family (which she points out more than once), with three quirky and creative kids to match the quirky and creative parents. In fact, she is too perfect and conventional for my taste; her life is devoted to the kids, with some book writing, she has the perfect besties and parents, and she's prototypical white upper middle class.

Her ex is a piece of work. Some of his ideas of having fun with the kids are dangerous (she may have cherry picked those, or she may have not even mentioned the worst). He quickly falls out of love with the woman he cheated with, and continues to have short relationships with a variety of women. I think that with all this, the author may have sometimes realized that she was better off without him, thus the title. Or not. When she wrote the book, she was still grieving the end of their relationship. (As I recall, I did that for years, but now I'm so glad it ended.) Her divorce definitely involved a loss of innocence via a rude awakening, and considerable heartbreak. I felt bad for her.

As other reviewers have pointed out, the way she wrote about the men she met when she finally started dating was snobby and mean. Her second husband was the last one she described. The way she wrote it, I didn't see any evidence she was actually attracted to him, though she must have been. I didn't see any evidence that he was a good person for her, and very little about who he was as a person. He had three kids too, and she low-key complains about them. They sold her house and moved, at his urging, and she wrote it as if he dragged her kicking and screaming. All that seemed a bit passive aggressive.

I liked the artwork, and the text went along with it nicely, and mostly chronicled the events and her feelings well. I could have given it four stars, but general smugness and bits of meanness brought it down to three.

[Nicole · Rating 5 out of 5]

Whether you have gone through a divorce or are just looking for a quirky graphic novel with a lot of heart, I highly recommend this candid and heartwarming memoir.

Both accessible and refreshingly off-beat, this grown-up graphic novel walks readers through Copeland's experience of divorce and brings them through the heartbreak for an empowering story of resilience--even after a world-shattering event.

The graphic novel format lends a quirky and relatable angle to the story, and makes the sometimes-difficult genre of the divorce memoir compulsively readable. I loved this, and highly recommend it.

[Laura · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a captivating read I found sad, hopeful, and very authentic. Too many times, when divorce cannot be avoided, the people telling of it try to slap a bunch of happy unicorns on it and act like it was the best thing ever. I especially liked Ms. Copeland's honesty, in how she showed that even when you get a new happy ending, there's still lingering sadness and grief over the death of a marriage, and that's not only okay, but a good and healthy thing to acknowledge. Another point I enjoyed, was the illustration of how you may think you know how you would react in such a situation, but until you're in it, you really don't know. That's more than helpful to keep in mind as we know others around us experiencing trials in their marriage, or the end of their marriage through the heartache of divorce.

[Emilia P · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is how you do a cartoon memoir! Copeland really storyboarded this thing before she wrote it, and it shows -- it's fascinating, honest, fair, and emotional but not manipulative. And her cartooning style -- more cartoony than artsy, but happily so, worked well with the way she told her story. I dunno, I just though she did a good job involving me without asking me to take a side or feel a certain way, and that really made it a pleasure to read and a chance to reflect on my thoughts about what makes relationships, and families, tick.

[Amanda Thomas · Rating 3 out of 5]

I really wanted to like this book but there's alot of whining about how her family changed after her husband cheated on her and the things she fusses about seem so first-world white person, I couldn't care less. The title implies, that she's better off without him but that's not the vibe I get from the story. "White Chick Deals With Divorce Like It Never Happened To Anyone Else Before" would be a better title.

[Kricket · Rating 2 out of 5]

i think this is the one andrea told me not to read. YOU WERE RIGHT ANDREA. what can i say, sometimes i like to torture myself and read sad stories about break-ups, kind of like other people watch horror movies for a good scare. TJ was an emotionally illiterate turd and cynthia was a clingy doormat. sad story, but only took about an hour to read.

[hals ☾ · Rating 3 out of 5]

I really liked the graphic novel format of this book. It was fun to read and the illustrations often made the serious content more lighthearted. However, there were parts in the story where the author would talk about a certain event, and on the next page she’d start talking about something completely different. The continuity was lacking in certain parts of the book— especially for a graphic novel where that should be the main thing that the author follows. For instance, the author barely touched upon:

- Her grandfathers death

- How her and her friend Kate bonded after Kate was cheated on

- When her friend Sarah moved out of town, that event was barely discussed, given how it did impact the author during the most painful parts of her breakup

It definitely came off as her getting bored / tired and not wanting to continue with discussing a certain event. Apart from that, I do wish it was longer with more details about her life after the move. It just didn’t really end on a satisfying note. It felt hurried, almost rushed. Overall, I’d give this 3 stars.

[BookCupid · Rating 3 out of 5]

Imagine finding an email from your husband's mistress.

Cynthia's world came crashing down when she made this horrible discovery. The pain grew even stronger once her husband, T.J. confessed his love for the other woman. We accompany Cynthia as she goes from shock to acceptance, deals with shared parenting, and finally dating again.

Although we certainly cannot judge someone else's life, it seemed like a missed opportunity to have only experienced the separation process and not the inner work that came with it. Being cheated on makes a woman feel ugly, old, undesirable, boring... it picks at your self-esteem. Cynthia didn't really go through that. She felt the tug of her children spending time with dad and the pain of being single at family or friends events, yes, but didn't seem to go through a spiritual awakening or to work on herself and the things that she had done wrong in her past relationship. It was like bam, I got cheated on, T.J. sucks.

Having said that, the last scene felt exaggerated compared to the Cynthia we got to know in the story.

[Jennifer · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed this graphic memoir. Especially as someone going through divorce as well. She captured the hard moments and went deep into what she went through which is not easy while engaging humor in not only the narrative but the illustrations as well. It's not too heavy and granted she comes off as a saint considering her husband's infidelity and the time it took him to acknowledge it but it shows the ups and downs which can be more up than down. Plus, given that it's a graphic novel there's not too much dwelling on the interior and time passes fast so you can get through it and know that SHE got through it as well.

It's a quick and delightful read that I'd recommend to anyone, but especially if you're going through your own heartache.

[Jeff · Rating 1 out of 5]

This wouldn't have helped me get through my divorce. I wonder if writers get the ok from family and friends to put them into books. Things others may want to keep private. Anyway, some may enjoy this but there must be better books on the subject. I think taking walks and listening to Bob Dylan's Blood on the Tracks was much more helpful and enjoyable.

[Maggie · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was like an okay cup of tea. A little bit bitter but still rather good in the end. If divorces are all like this, you're probably better off single. Not my usual read, but definitely interesting..


*Won from Goodreads Giveaway*

[Dichotomy Girl]

This was not enjoyable. It was depressing and induced that awkward feeling you get when someone shares too much on facebook. DNF @25%

[Gloria · Rating 4 out of 5]

Simple, charming illustrations enhance the text.

[Marina Schulz · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed "Good Riddance", inspite of the negative reviews here on GoodReads.

The artwork is cartoonish and cheery, but somehow is perfect at conveying Copeland’s emotions as she navigated separation from her husband. Sometimes you don’t need something sophisticated to convey feeling, and to me at least the artwork did a great job at showcasing the duality of the author’s profound sadness and feeling of loss, while still conveying how she felt she had to keep it together and mask up for her family.

To me, this is what made the book so relatable. It really encapsulates that feeling when you thought you had it all figured out, and then everything comes crumbling down. And yet you have to do your best to pick up the pieces.

At the same time, its not a perfect book, and I appreciate that its not trying to be. It's clearly a product of the 2000s, which is in some ways a little dated, both in terms of humour and how the main character acts at times.

For instance, for a 2020s reader it can be hard to imagine caring this much about the stigma of divorce - but at the same time, the feeling of shame that comes from ending a long-term relationship can be hard to grasp for those who haven't gone through it, even if things like divorce are taken much less seriously nowadays. Another issue addressed by other reviewers is that the main character at times seems a little self-absorved, but I think that's okay. This is a memoir first and a deeply personal story, so I think it makes sense in this context. Especially as there are honestly moments in life where you just do your best to keep on trucking while everything else falls to the backside.

Overall, I can see why this book could be quite a lot of comfort for people going through an emotional and unexpected break-up or divorce and I found the story very real, but also uplifting and relatable. To be honest, there aren't that many books out there that deal with the emotions you go through when dealing with the heartbreak that comes from a long term relationship, so I would definitely recommend "Good Riddance" to other readers.

[Angie Fehl · Rating 3 out of 5]

Using the graphic novel / memoir format, Cynthia Copeland unveils the story of her marriage of 18 years, and the subsequent divorce after discovering her husband had been unfaithful. Copeland shares her story with readers a decade after things first went down, but some of the emotions that are wrapped up in such an event prove universal and timelessly relatable.

Copeland explains the guilt she had to learn to work through, coming from a family where no one had divorced before, as well as the secret stress and anxiety she shouldered while trying to protect her young children from the truth of why mom and dad weren't going to live together anymore.

This story is no different from other divorce memoirs you've read in the way it conveys that there are no real winners in this kind of life upheaval. Copeland paints her husband as a selfish, immature man possibly suffering a mid-life crisis. Trying to recapture his youth yet still keep close to his wife, his actions were that of someone trying to have their cake and eat it too. He seemed more concerned with being "cool dad" than responsible grown up. Copeland makes it clear she wasn't having it, but at the same time some of her actions towards him struck me as tiptoeing into control freak territory.

For such a tough topic, the choice of cool blue-grey tones on the art were strangely calming. Don't know if that was intentional or not... regardless, it was kinda nice, diffused the tougher moments a bit. The blue tones combined with the art style itself ... something about it brought to mind vintage hospital pamphlets!

[Maggie · Rating 3 out of 5]

There is nothing wrong with this book. It's a perfectly fine account of a woman's unexpected divorce from her crumbum doof of a husband and her struggle to maintain some semblance of normalcy for her family amongst all the disruption. Everything flows well enough and it was certainly a compelling snapshot of the dissolution of a marriage.

That being said, I left feeling that this was somewhat of a featherweight depiction of events that I'm sure were much more emotionally intense and there were a few things that just plain bugged me. For instance, why include some illustrations of 9/11 when they have nothing to do with the story? Why did she feel a need to call out that one of her ill-fated paramours was a "midget" while another was apparently so ugly that it looked like his face had been constructed by Picasso? Most importantly, why even introduce her new husband and her newfound insta-family to the readers when very little time was devoted to detailing their courtship or even explaining what it is that she loved about her new dude? Even just a few extra pages would have given the story much more emotional weight; instead, it felt as though the readers were reviewing a laundry list of life events in chronological order.

I do not regret reading the first half of the book in bed while on edibles and then breezing through the second half after work the following day. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever need to read this one again.

[Sharon · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book was fine. It feels a little wrong to give it three stars when I gave Are You My Mother? two, given that I had about the same experience of them--a retelling of mundane tragedy in the life of a memoirist I come to not like very much over the course of the book. This one rounds up a star over the other, though, because it took me an hour to read instead of six.

It's the story of a plain old divorce, with a lot of sweet parenting stories thrown in (her kids were by far the best part of the book). Her husband comes across as a rampaging jerk (and, to be fair, if even half of this is factual, he probably was), but she isn't very self-aware when she writes about how she can't navigate to her parents' house or deal with a spider. Some of the ways she analyzes the guys she dates later on come across as very obnoxious, too (seriously, no one I like at all makes fun of someone for being short).

Me, never mind, I talked myself down to two stars.

[Mary · Rating 3 out of 5]

As a real live Divorced Person, maybe I was hoping to find something relatable and universal in the deeply painful experience of failing at your marriage, but this was not the book. Cindy comes across as a helicopter mom with little identity of her own, though I did feel sympathy for the way she discovered her husband's infidelity and had to rebuild her life. However, there were some truly cruel things she said about some of the men she tried dating after the divorce that I found off-putting. Being short, for example, does not make a man an undesirable mutant. If he's not attractive to you, fine, but it seems like a pretty low blow to mock him for it in your graphic novel. Cindy's portrayal of herself is generic and privileged, and aside from being stripped of her illusions about having the perfect family, she really doesn't lose much in the dissolution of her marriage as presented in this book. I'm just not sure I understand what about this experience justified a memoir.

[Jennifer · Rating 4 out of 5]

The whole premise of a graphic novel about divorce was what got me to read this book. I think it's well done and the illustrations are nice complements to the story. There were some areas I found overly wordy but I get that it was a memoir and that she had to capture things in a way that she could present graphically. For example the Bingo game ....

All in all, it reads well. I think that, if you were going through a divorce, this book may also be a comfort to you as you deal with the breakup and dissolution of a marriage. I commend her for having such a good relationship with her ex. Even though everyone wanted her to be vengeful, she took the higher road, and it seems to have paid off. But she also presented it realistically (for the most part) and showed the challenges of learning to let someone have their space in this type of relationship.

[Kate Stericker · Rating 4 out of 5]

On the whole, this graphic memoir was an enjoyable read--the visuals are attractive and cleverly done and it's easy to become invested in Copeland's story despite its personal nature. However, I was turned off by the mean-spirited barbs that occasionally pepper her narration, particularly since many of them target people who have not wronged Copeland in any way. Although I believe they were meant to be funny, judgmental comments about a date with dwarfism, a lab tech who flirted with TJ before they were married, and a friend's bisexual neighbour (who she won't date because she "doesn't feel up to competing with half the population, never mind the entire population") struck me as cruel and unnecessary.

[Jamie · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'm reading a lot of pretty heavy nonfiction right now, so I perused the graphic literature section of my library a breezier format. I powered through this graphic memoir in an afternoon and I'm glad it's over. Even though Copeland reveals a lot about her family and her divorce and remarriage, I didn't feel like I got a true sense for who she is or any deep realizations she had because of this--too much hiding. Also, I don't have much patience for jokes about autism and midgets; what's your point with pushing down other people? A cute drawing style and some snarkiness helped what could have been a really poignant story of a woman digging deep; instead, this fell way flat.

[Jailynn · Rating 4 out of 5]

A quick read full of emotion. It might be hard for someone who hasn't gone through a hurtful relationship break up to connect but for those who have, this will bring back some memories. I haven't been divorced and I don't have children but I went through a very difficult and long breakup of deeply committed relationship and I had seen divorce from a teenager's view. There's nothing wrong with divorce but it sucks when it puts others through pain. I teared up a little at Ikea. Honestly. Between the home organization and the fake plants.

[Ryan Fohl · Rating 3 out of 5]

I found this interesting because I don’t have kids and I havent divorced with kids. I like the tone. There is humor and lots of good visual gags. The characters are developed (her kids seem great.) This is a mother who went all in on mothering, and the book shows the pros and cons of that for herself and the children. It’s not as insightful as fun home. For example the 9/11 panel
Is not earned. The art work is ok.

What I learned: put that old Christmas tree outside we bird food on it so beautiful.

[David Thomas · Rating 4 out of 5]

Graphic memoir of a woman who discovers after 18 years of marriage that her husband has been cheating on her for a while and has fallen in love with someone else. I get the feeling that pretty much anyone who has been dumped can empathize, even if her case is somewhat extreme. I found it kind of curious how OK she seemed dealing with the ex, especially after that kind of betrayal. The art isn't great, but isn't bad enough to distract from the story.

[☆ Katie ☆ · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was very intrigued by this artist/author's idea to illustrate the experience of going through a divorce. The style of art and the author's voice was quirky and easy to read. I think this story paints an honest and raw idea of what a divorce experience can be like. Although tough topics were touched upon, it was done in a refreshing and interesting way.

[Meghan · Rating 2 out of 5]

The author's reflections on what it was like to go through a divorce were fine, but CW for brief ableist and biphobic comments in the section regarding the author's dating life after divorce.

Let's just say it's real interesting that she ruled out the possibility of dating a man because he was bisexual but was okay (for a while) with dating a man who hated Democrats and loved guns.

[Ruth · Rating 4 out of 5]

This must have been very cathartic for the author. I thought it was a wonderful depiction and a clever way to put the story out there.

She captured the mess and pain of betrayal and divorce perfectly. Coming from a family of an excessive amount of multiple divorces, I also found it cathartic.