Crap Dates: Disastrous Encounters from Single Life

by Rhodri Marsden

A good date can be a shared joke, an improbable spark, long moments of gazing fondly into each other's eyes. Not so for the dating disasters featured in this collection of laugh-out-loud actual tweets about the most terrible evenings imaginable. From seriously unwelcome confessions, to dousing dates in wine, to bringing them back to creepy apartments to meet favorite stuffed animals, here are the funniest and most alarming reports from dating's front lines. Along the way, author Rhodri Marsden offers tips on how to identify and avoid the worst of the bad daters, including married men, blatant liars, deluded optimists, and more. This harrowing collection of real nightmare dates will amuse anyone who's suffered through one of cupid's off nights.

Genres: Nonfiction, Humor, Romance

Paperback

First published February 2, 2012

About the author

Writer, Musician, Author, Musical Director, Producer, Composer, Copywriter.

Reviews

[HeavyReader · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book collects accounts of dates gone wrong. The accounts are from Twitter, so they're all super short. There's an introduction and some general, uninspired commentary on the different types of bad dates one might encounter ("the sexual deviant," "the macho poser," "the unhinged drunkard"), but I could have done without all of that. The good part here (mildly funny and somewhat sad) are the short short stories of bad bad dates.

Someone loaned this book to me, for which I am glad. I red it in twenty or thirty minutes and can't imagine reading it again, so I don't think buying it would have been a good investment for me.

[Ange · Rating 2 out of 5]

A fun, light, quick read. I wish I had read it when I first bought it some time ago instead of waiting so long.

[Kelly · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ohhhhh...ouch. So many of theses stories are just painful...and painfullly funny. There's a lot of twisted people out there.

[Gina Zappa · Rating 5 out of 5]

"No woman is expecting a bloke to take off his jacket and place it over a muddy puddle, but they'd rather he didn't stomp in the puddle hard, while laughing. Or tell her to mop it up."

This little book was hilarious. Anyone can identify with the hilarious little stories in here, especially if you, like me, are still out there treading the treacherous waters of the dating pool. Solid laughs. I highly recommend you give this a read.

[ChaCha Ala Mode · Rating 3 out of 5]

And this is a compilations of tweets from bad to very bad dates. This little gem is quite entertaining, however thankfully I am not only twittarded and cannot tweet, I am also not dateable so these are things I have never experienced!

[Sharla · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is a funny book for the coffee table or silly collection, but it's not much more than a few laughs here and there. The book is comprised of a collection of twitter entries for "bad date" stories.

[Alana · Rating 3 out of 5]

My housemate and friend bought this and I read through it one weekend for a laugh. It certainly delivered, although some of the entries were more cringe then actually funny it was amusing none the less. Good coffee table, mindless reading!

[Jup · Rating 2 out of 5]

Less a book than a short collection of tweets about dating. However I laughed out loud a few times and was not surprised to find some examples close to my own dating disaster stories. It's only 66 pages and only that long because of the fonts. It was an entertaining waste of a half hour.

[Meredith · Rating 5 out of 5]

Yes this is a very short read and has very little written parts (it is mostly a compilation of the tweets about horrible dates). However, I got it cheap and laughed the whole way through so I found it thoroughly enjoyable!

[Jill Laker · Rating 2 out of 5]

Meh. I'm sure this was hilarious 8 years ago when it came out. Now its just better to stick to the worst date stuff on the Facebook. I did smirk some, but I've been on many worse dates than those listed.

[zombiereadz · Rating 3 out of 5]

Hilarious read.

Crap dates is the perfect toilet humour book or a gift book for a friend who has been on horrendous dates to let him or her know that they are not alone!

[Joy Chapman · Rating 2 out of 5]

Mildly amusing... More cringe than crack-up moments, but it was good for a bit of light reading!

[Chris · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very funny book. It's not going to change the world, but it was good for a couple hours of chuckles. Some of these dates were so horrible that I can't even believe that they were real.

[Yvonne Leuthard · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hilarious! A great read for an annoyingly dull depressing day. If you've ever gone to a crappy date you will savor this.

[Hannah · Rating 2 out of 5]

A 2.5, not really a book, just some twitter ramblings but cute and amusing.

[Stacey Myers · Rating 3 out of 5]

cute short book with just tweets regarding blind dates.

[Melody · Rating 5 out of 5]

Cute, funny ebook for Twitter people. And for people who are dating and having an awful time of it. It made me laugh and it made me grateful I don't have bad dating stories quite like these

[Ania · Rating 2 out of 5]

There is not enough background to make these stories truly funny because these are just short tweets. Each tweet quickly melts into the next and the humour is lost in the process.

[Melissa · Rating 3 out of 5]

Light hearted book of bad dating - fun to pass the afternoon and smile at your own memories of similar fate.

[Abdul · Rating 4 out of 5]

“In theory, a period of relentless dating might improve your chances of meeting someone wonderful, but it mainly establishes a long line of people for you to spend disappointing evenings with while you wait for the right person to come along.
There’s a positive outcome to emerge from the crammed diary of the hopeful singleton, however, and that’s the extraordinary stockpile of anecdotes detailing all the times it went badly wrong. Whether you disliked the other person, they disliked you, or you found some kind of grim solidarity in your mutual loathing, that unique and acute social discomfort becomes seared into your memory. The stories become dinner party staples as your grim experiences, mellowed by time, transform into comedy gold. "

Synopsis:
In August this year, inspired by a particularly horrendous date he'd just had and fed up with the trials of single life, journalist and author Rhodri Marsden invited his Twitter followers to send in their worst ever dating experiences (in 140 characters or less, of course). The result was astonishing. Within hours Rhodri was flooded with 1000s of crazy, shocking and hilarious true stories of dating disasters. And as the word spread, people all over the world began to submit their calamitous experiences, sending Rhodri's Tweet viral and attracting the attention of newspapers, TV shows and online magazines drawn to this incredible story.

Crap Dates is the best from Rhodri's hilarious collection of real-life dating howlers and is guaranteed to bring a smile to anyone who has ever had a bad date.

My Take:
I picked up this book after it piqued my curiosity following a string of bad and downright hilarious dates. I had many tales of extraordinary crap date tales that endlessly entertain my friends at the dinner table. So, when I spotted this book on Amazon whilst browsing one night, I thought I should have a look!

At first, I had the wrong impression that it would be a proper book and not a compilation of bad dates in 140-character tweets. I thought I was disappointed for a moment (should have read the synopsis carefully!) until I started reading the tweets. I could not stop cringing or laughing at some of the tales and I really enjoyed this book. Some unthinkable dates and their misfortunes made me believe my dates were not all that bad after all!

Recommended for a slow weekend night if you want to peak into other people's hilarious or horrendous dates!

Quotes:

"He suggested I shag him: “You might as well, I’m going to tell people we slept together anyway.” I declined. He was true to his word."

"He drove me three times around the block so I could fully admire the walnut dashboard on his new Jag. It was a five minute walk."

"I pointed at his wedding ring. “Oh, sorry.” He put it in his pocket. “So, where were we?” he said."

[Julio Biason · Rating 2 out of 5]

Ok, so not much as "offer tips", but mostly "these are things that people replied to me when I complained about a bad date".

Not that the topic doesn't have a merit -- I mean, who doesn't want to know that they weren't the only ones in a bad date -- but it felt like there was some lacking of research. And I don't mean field research, but actually talking to people instead of capturing their tweets and putting them in book form.

For example, you have this:

A 23 yr old girl. “I think for my age I’ve achieved a hell of a lot.” she said. Then talked for three hours about her internet business.

Sure, that's a huge presumptuous comment to make in a first date, but "yr"? Couldn't we edit this so at least it looks correct? Couldn't we do a research on how the date went, how they met, how they picked a place and so on? Just the tweet, then?

I mean, sure, the tweets tell a lot about how bad things went, but at least more details would be nicer, specially when you go to a book format.

[Aaron · Rating 3 out of 5]

Eh, it's funny. Not a lot of substance but just reading some of these I'm kind of happy I don't have time to go dating as much. I got it in a humble bundle for... I dunno a few cents and I feel like for occupying my time enough and making me laugh or cringe occasionally it's probably worth at least that. Good job Rhodri Marsden!

[Shanni · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read this in short bursts during finals week and broke out in laughter each time. Each story no longer than a tweet, they're short and (rarely) sweet. I wouldn't actually go so far as to purchase the book, but I got an eBook as part of a group, so I figured I might as well read it.

[Markus · Rating 1 out of 5]

Nothing original. The author just copy-pasted lots of tweets (less than 140 character posts) of crappy dates. I wish there were more in-depth stories but there were none. Pretty much none of the stories were the author's.

[Rebecca · Rating 3 out of 5]

A series of generally 2 sentence anecdotes. Mildly amusing, not brilliantly so. A thing to read on your phone while in line at the grocery store.

[Siobhán · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hilarious!!

[Peter Dijkstra · Rating 1 out of 5]

Got it in a bundle, horrible, just a compilation of tweets

[Jane Francis · Rating 5 out of 5]

A quick read but hilarious, especially if you can empathize with some of the situations. Great for days when you just want to stay in bed and pretend the outside world doesn't exist.

[Charlotte Cowley · Rating 4 out of 5]

8 / 10

I found this book funny and easily got through it in an hour.

[Pug · Rating 3 out of 5]

Some chuckles. Mildly amusing texts, but the commentary didn't contribute much. Super-short, so the perfect size.