The Trouble with Secrets

by Naomi Milliner

A Jewish girl preparing for her upcoming bat mitzvah tries to keep a secret—along with one of her sister’s—in this beautiful coming-of-age contemporary novel that explores change, grief, and the complexities of sibling relationships.

Twelve-year-old Becky has great expectations placed upon her. Not only does she need to be as perfect as her older brother and sister, but her upcoming bat mitzvah needs to be perfect, too. She is the rabbi’s daughter, after all. The trouble is, Becky’s intentions often lead her astray. At least when she plays the flute, she feels like the best version of herself. Until playing the flute causes Becky to do something not so perfect: keep a secret from her parents.

Then Becky discovers that Sara, her "perfect" sister, has an even bigger secret. One that could turn the family upside down. The sisters couldn’t be more ready to keep each other’s secret safe…until the excitement turns to guilt, and Becky is forced to make an impossible choice.

When secrets are shared and choices are made, doing the right thing can feel so wrong. And Becky will learn that actions, no matter how well intended, always have consequences.

 

Genres: Middle Grade, Realistic Fiction, Jewish, Contemporary, Family, Grief, Fiction

336 pages, Hardcover

Published April 8, 2025

About the author

Naomi’s love of literature led her to an English degree at the University of Maryland; her love of cinema led her to the University of Southern California, where she earned an MFA in Screenwriting. After ten years in Hollywood, her fear of earthquakes (especially hiding under a kitchen table with her baby) led her back to Maryland, where she happily resides with her husband and sons Jeremy and Jesse. Her debut middle grade novel, SUPER JAKE & THE KING OF CHAOS, was inspired by the chaotic – and magical – goings-on when her youngest son, Jake, was alive. If you’d like to know more about Jake, please visit Naomi’s blog at: https://naomimilliner.wordpress.com/b...

Reviews

[Caroline · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am so thankful for this book. Growing up a book like this wasn’t an option for me, so being able to read this book as an adult was the most therapeutic and lovely experience. Becky is a great protagonist and getting to experience so many different highs and lows was fascinating. The author does a fantastic job of capturing a realistic story of grief especially as someone who experienced loss too young like Becky. Her family is my favorite part of this entire book and I enjoyed their dynamic so much, and found them so relatable and lovely. I can’t say enough good things about this book.

Thank you so much to NetGalley and Harper Collins for this ARC, and the representation of girls like me.

[Rebekkah · Rating 4 out of 5]

Despite the mention of grief in the book's description, this book was much more intense than I had anticipated. I began reading thinking it would end up being a fairly light-hearted book about a relationship between sisters and an impending bat mitzvah, but I quickly realized that was not the case. I was a bit disappointed because I enjoyed reading about Becky and her family dynamics, particularly so because her dad is a rabbi, which provides a different and important perspective that I've rarely seen in middle grade books, and I would have been happy reading about them without the tragic event that occurs near the end of the book.

While I understand that the plot twist in the book is supposed to be just that, I wish the description had been more forthright about the subject matter. I found the two separate parts of the book jarring, although I suppose that is the point: grief is jarring. I also wonder just how many middle grade readers would relate to the discussions about Jewish continuity and Becky's parents' insistence that their children marry other Jews. I think it's an interesting topic to address in a middle-grade book, but the way it was handled was not my favorite. Despite that, I still think this is an important book for its representation of a Jewish family.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for providing an e-ARC in exchange for an honest review.

[Polly-Alida · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lovingly written, telling the story of a Becky, who is reluctantly preparing for her Bat Mitzvah, with the extra pressure of being the daughter of a rabbi and standing in the shadow of her two older siblings who Becky feels did far better with their bar/bat mitzvahs than she could ever do. Besides, she’d much rather be playing her flute and competing to be in the all-county band. Defying her parents, she secretly auditions. Confiding in her older sister, she discovers her sister has some secrets too. And of course, secrets have consequences. Highly recommended. Thanks to author, publisher and NetGalley for preview copy.

[Reading_ Tamishly · Rating 2 out of 5]

When middle grade books start disappointing. It got boring really fast and the characters are frustrating.

[Ms. Yingling · Rating 3 out of 5]

E ARC provided by Netgalley

When we first meet 7th grader Becky, she is getting ready for a funeral, and feels that her family will never be okay again. We don't find out about the tragedy for a good half of the book, and this creates a lot of tension, so I don't want to spoil it. Becky lives with her family, which includes her mother, father who is a rabbi, older siblings Jon and Sara, and younger brother Benji. She plays flute, and is very interested in trying out for the All-County band, but she hasn't been working on the preparations for her upcoming bat mitzvah. Her best friend Nipa is also in band, and encourages to keep practicing in case her parents allow her to try out. Becky is sad when Jon goes off to college, and concerned when she finds out that Sara is lying to her about where she has been. Sara is involved in a high school production of Les Miserables, and when Becky and Nipa go to school to offer to help with the play (when they really just want to spy on Sara), they find out that she is dating Sean, the son of a new pastor in town. Since their father is constantly saying that they can only marry Jewish men, and their cousin Miri is at odds with her parents because she has married a gentile, Becky is concerned. Becky is so desperate to try out for the band that after her parents say she can't, she forgets her mother's signature and does well on the audition. On New Year's Eve, hoping to start the year as a better person, she tells her parents, and they give her one week to convince them that her bat mitzvah preparations are progressing. Shortly after, a series of events spirals into tragedy, and Becky and her family spend the rest of the book navigating their way through their new reality.
Strengths: I enjoyed spending time Becky's family, and watching her relationships with her siblings. There is not enough of this in middle grade literature, considering how important family members are to tweens. Often, they are portrayed as annoyances, so the fact that Becky truly loved her siblings but got involved in their problems was refreshing. This is a great book for Jewish representation, and the fact that Becky's bat mitzvah is not quite as important as her All-County band tryout to he is also a nice change of pace. The grief that takes up most of the last third of the book is handled in a contemporary way.
Weaknesses: For the family of a rabbi, there is a lot of lying and subterfuge. There are some good cultural details about activities the close knit family does that relate to their Jewish culture, but there is surprisingly little about the religious aspects of their life. I would have expected the entire family to spend a lot more time hanging out at the synagogue; my friends whose parents were pastors practically lived at their churches. Also, the father's insistence that his children only marry other Jewish people seemed problematic in today's cultural and political climate.
What I really think: This is a good choice for readers who liked Milliner's entry in Baron's collection On All Other Nights: A Passover Celebration in 14 Stories or the extreme grief of Millington's Once For Yes.

I'll never be convinced that the way to help children process grief is to put the idea in their minds that they will "never be okay". People die. Every day. If this were true, the entire world would grind to a halt. While Becky does make some progress in coming to terms with what has happened, this is still a very sad book. I know a lot of teachers and librarians love books like this, but they will never be my favorite.

[Lesley · Rating 5 out of 5]

“The trouble with keeping secrets was that secrets led to lies, and one lie led to the next…like a not-so-fun game of dominoes.” (130)…

“If I had learned anything in the past couple of weeks, it was that secrets could be exciting and fun, but they could also cause trouble. A lot of trouble. And, sometimes, they ended up hurting the people you loved most.” (213)

This is a story about secrets, why people have them, why people keep them, with whom they trust to share them, and the power, responsibility, and danger of keeping them for others.

This is the story of two sisters who are close enough to trust each other with their secrets. And it is the story of love—love between siblings, the love of friends, and love that is forbidden by religious intolerance. And it is the story of the sacredness of promises.

Becky and Sara, although years apart, are as close is sisters can be—bound together by a love of music. When Becky trusts Sara with the secret that, even though she was forbidden to audition for All-County Band because her parents wanted her to prepare for her Bat Mitzvah—speech, Torah reading, and mitzvah project, she forged her mother’s signature and was planning to audition anyway. That’s the first big secret. And then Becky discovers Sara’s secret, that even though the daughter of a rabbi, she is in love with a Gentile boy, a relationship that their parents would never condone. Along the way there are smaller secrets as the lies pile up.

When the girls’ cousin Mira elopes with a non-Jew, and Aunt Ruth and Uncle Jacob won’t even see her, Sara realizes how impossible her own relationship is, and head-strong and a risk-taker, she makes a disastrous decision.

This is an emotional story of a close family—father, mother, older and younger brothers, and Becky and Sara, and the secrets that can destroy them. And it is a story of faith and the loss of faith. What I found most powerful was the interjection of pages titled “NOW” which hinted at the tragedy to come.
“I WISH
Mom could still sing.
I wish
Dad could still explain.
I wish
Sara could still dream.
I wish
Benji could still laugh.
Most of all, I wish
I could still
imagine a happy ending.” (35)

Naomi Millner’s newest novel, which shares Jewish traditions, holidays, and culture, is important read for tweens and teens and one that will generate important discussions.

[Karen Cohn · Rating 5 out of 5]

This novel is beautifully written and incredibly engrossing, despite the underlying sadness caused by Becky's grief; it shows a picture of a complicated family, with all the joys and problems that come when family members tell each other lies in an attempt to not upset each other. I read it in a day.

This is a novel I wish had already been written when I was Becky's age; there simply were no books about Jewish tweens that treated Judaism as a normal, everyday fact of life. I did not realize until I read this one how much such a novel had been missing in my life. So many novels about Jewish youth involve the youth giving up some part of their Judaism to fit better into modern society, but this one doesn't; instead, it shows Becky grappling with significant religious rite - her Bat Mitzvah - and how to fit it into all the other things that she needs, and wants, to do. Her sister Sara's struggles with falling in love with a wonderful young man who happens to not be Jewish - especially when their cousin has been largely disinherited by her parents for marrying her non-Jewish husband - is another theme that is often missing from young adult literature.

Yes, there is grief here; the loss that Becky experiences is deep and profound, but it is told with such compassion that it enhances the story, rather than overwhelming it. This novel is appropriate for all readers ages middle school to adult, although younger readers - especially those who have experienced the loss of a family member or close friend due to accident - may benefit from discussing it as they read.

I voluntarily read and reviewed an advanced copy of this book provided by Netgalley. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

[Randi Vengelen · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was surprisingly tragic despite the cutesy cover and somewhat vague description of a coming-of-age story that tackles aspects of grief. I did enjoy the book as I was reading it but found myself hesitant to pick it up and settle into it once I reached about the midway point of the book. Naomi Milliner's writing is engaging and relatively fast-paced, which is perfect for the middle grade audience that it is aimed at. The structure of the first half of the book, in which we jump back and forth between "before" and "after" the incident, builds tension with regard to who our protagonist, Becky, will be grieving the loss of. The characters are well established and likable, which makes the reveal so much more heartbreaking.

Without giving too much away, the book takes place over a few months within the lives of Becky Myerson's traditional Jewish family. Becky is the third child of four with an older brother and sister and one younger brother. Her relationship with her family, friends, and her faith are centered in the text. Becky is in middle school and a talented musician. Her older sister Sara is a gifted singer. The two sisters have a strong bond and share everything with one another. This includes some major secrets that neither wants their rabbi father for fear of his disapproval. Eventually, the family is dealt a tragic blow, and the family is left to process their grief in varying ways. The depiction of which is shown with both productive and harmful outcomes. Overall, this is a book that can be beneficial for young teens that are dealing with loss and attempting to navigate their own grief.

I will add that there was one part of the text that really bothered me and continues to bother me still. No spoilers, but at the opening, Becky is trying to figure out what to wear to a funeral. The scene is written as intentionally misleading, and it left me with a slightly soured opinion of the book. I was bothered that Milliner immediately set up the book with an event that shifts at the halfway point. It felt unnecessary and cheap as it seemed to be a way to intentionally throw the reader off when making predictions based on the context. If the narrator was fully unreliable it would have fit, but this is the only time this happens, and I was bothered enough to keep from giving it a full five stars. Otherwise, I still think the book holds a lot of value for young readers that are able to handle emotionally heavy material.

[TheNextGenLibrarian · Rating 5 out of 5]

Secrets overwhelm twelve-year-old Becky in this coming-of-age MG book.
🕍
Becky feels a lot of pressure as she prepares for her bat mitzvah, tries to live up to her perfect older siblings’ and stay on top of flute practice—the one thing she believes she’s good at. When she secretly auditions for all-country band against her parents’ wishes, she also finds out about a secret her older sister is hiding too. Secrets have consequences and the choices we make can live with us forever.
🪈
Sometimes MG books will make such an impact on your life that they will stay with you. Such is the case for The Trouble with Secrets. The first half of the story will pull you into a loving Jewish family with a Rabbi for a father. The second half will create a new reality for Becky and her family to navigate as best they can. I truly enjoyed this one—reading it in one sitting! Special thanks to Naomi for sharing a copy of this novel with me. You’re going to want to add this to your middle school library It releases April 8.

CW: death of a sibling, car accident, grief

4.5 ⭐️

[Bonnie Grover · Rating 4 out of 5]

Twelve-year-old Becky would give anything to go back to how it was before. Before secrets were shared and promises given. Before choices were made, and doing the right thing became so wrong. One of the first things Becky has known since she was little is the importance of a promise. Her dad, who is a rabbi taught her “A promise is sacred, like the truth.” When Becky’s parents won’t sign her permission form so she can audition for the All-Country band, she forges her mom’s signature and keeps it a secret from her family. When her sister, Sara discovers her secret, she promises to keep quiet, especially since Becky has discovered that Sara has a secret too. Keeping secrets brings the sisters closer, until excitement turns to guilt, and Becky if force to make an impossible choice. Themes: family, grief, faith, and truths.

I had no idea this book would touch my heart like it did. I love learning about other people’s faith and healing processes. “This book will leave a handprint on your heart.”

[Glenna Coleman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Twelve year-old Becky has always looked up to her older brother Jon and older sister Sara; they seem perfect to her. Now that Becky is preparing for her bat mitzvah, she can't help seeing how dismally she fails to measure up. Becky can't think of a project, can't recite her lines, and can't think of a speech to give. At the same time, her older siblings are changing too, with Jon off to college and Sara having her first boyfriend, a non-Jewish boyfriend, whom Sara has not told their parents about. The only success Becky feels is playing the flute, but her father won't let her try out for a special music group. In defiance, Becky tries out anyway, but the weight of her secret is heavy and when Sara asks her to keep her secret as well, Becky doesn't know what to do. The consequences of those secrets will have long-lasting impact for the entire family, even when Becky chooses truth over secrets. Milliner keeps a fine tension, just enough, throughout the story, much of which is told as a flashback leading up to the present circumstance, and keeps the reader engrossed until the end.

[Suzy · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a beautiful look at being Jewish and trying to find where you fit in the world.
I really liked Becky and her family. Her father is a Rabbi and the family does have some expectations which are weighing on her sister Sara. Becky also feels the pressure as she prepares for her Bat Mitzvah.
Becky loves playing her flute, just like her sister likes to act and sing. She is very close with her sister and they both do some things that create secrets that they end up keeping for each other. But Becky learns that keeping secrets can weigh on you and be hard to keep.
I loved the Jewish representation in this book. The family is close and supportive of each other.
I really liked Becky's friend Nipa too and how they are there for each other.
What happens in this book is tragic, I was crying along with these characters. But I liked watching Becky figure out how to continue and pour herself into music.

A beautiful Jewish middle grade book.

Thank you NetGalley for this ARC.

[Betsy · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is a treasure.

This book is by turns funny, heartwarming, sad, and sweet but ultimately its a tale of love, hope, and family. While Rebecca and her family Jewish and her father a rabbi, this book is a classic coming-of-age story that would appeal to all readers. The themes are universal.

I just really fell in love with every character in this book. Each person is finely drawn, authentic, and feels like they could be somone I know. As a middle school English teacher, I think this one that many of my students would relate to (family, siblings, school, growing up, secrets, romance) and definitely would enjoy. I loved it as an adult! I cried three times! It was so heartwrenching!

While I read this one in e-book format, I would love to check out the audiobook version. I feel like this one would really lend itself to strong performances.

[Yapha · Rating 4 out of 5]

(3.5 stars, rounded up)

We know from the start of the book that something very bad has happened. It takes about two-thirds of the book for the flashbacks to catch up with the present, and for the reader to find out what. From that point on the grief was heavy and almost unbearable. The beginning of the book dealt with the normal types of secrets that kids might keep from their parents and siblings might band together over. Although this was set in present day, there were certain things that felt like a holdover from my childhood in the 80s. For example, my parents never knew if I wasn't where I said I was. Today, however, most parents can see their children's locations because of tracking apps on phones. If you know middle grade students looking for a really sad book, this is it. For grades 4 & up.

eARC provided by publisher via Edelweiss

[Emily · Rating 5 out of 5]

Despite reading the synopsis, I was unprepared for how sad this book would be. This is a story about the consequences of keeping secrets, whether they are mostly harmless, like forging your parents' signature so you can audition for all-county band, to the more serious, like hiding a relationship that you know they would disapprove of. But it's also about grief, how it can affect people differently, and how to move past it.

I really loved the characters - they were all so endearing and had strong relationships with each other. Which made this story hurt so much more. I was sobbing by the end, which is why it earned a five-star rating. If a book can make me cry like that, it's worthy of that rating. I also loved the emphasis on music and its healing power.

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for a free e-arc in exchange for an honest review!

[Jasmine Shouse · Rating 5 out of 5]

What started as a cute story about a middle schooler wanting to play flute in a prestigious group turned really sad but ended with a message of hope. This is a very on-target read for its intended audience. While there is a sense of foreboding sprinkled throughout which foreshadows what happens, it makes the struggle of family members and grief accessible for pre-teens.

This book did get a significant reaction out of me, and I always appreciate the stories where that happens. As a former flute-playing middle schooler, I really connected to Becky. I would definitely recommend for kids 11-14, especially ones who have siblings and love music.

Thank you to NetGalley and publisher for the opportunity to read and review.

[Leonard Kim · Rating 4 out of 5]

Well-written and readable from the start, kind of a Fiddler on the Roof situation with daughters doing things their observant Jewish family would not approve of. Though unlike Fiddler, this is a high-achieving family which, while rendered more realistically than in many children’s books, is still something I don’t love reading about, but that’s just a personal bias.

The more important thing is, I think many readers (as I did) will consciously reserve judgment through much of the book until they see what the author does with the Awful Thing that hangs over everything from the very first page but takes 230 pages to rear its head. You can easily imagine this crashing and burning. Well, I thought what came after the Awful Thing worked, so props for that and no regrets pushing through.

[Jacqueline Lee · Rating 5 out of 5]

This beautiful story touches my heart and soul.
It explores love, loss, grief, and resilience.
There are alternating “Now” and flashback sections which create gripping suspense as Becky, a twelve year old girl, finds her way through a complicated world.
She navigates relationships between siblings, generations, and religions.
She has to balance wanting to follow her own path with respecting the wishes and expectations of the people she loves.
Most important, after suffering a profound loss, she finds her “way to a new normal”, a new purpose and a new joy.
The Trouble with Secrets is an inspirational resource.

[Darlene · Rating 5 out of 5]

This coming-of-age story is a thoughtful journey through the ups and downs of family, friendship, loss, love, and how secrets can have unexpected consequences for all of it. The things that make us happy and wanting to celebrate and the loss of those we love collide as twelve-year-old Becky and her family learn some hard truths. Even when life gets difficult, sad, and feels too much, love will sustain us and carry us through. A powerful message of hope and how we honor those we love resonate throughout the story.

[Anne Shirley · Rating 4 out of 5]

I am still recovering from the book. It was such an amazing read. I formed a connection with each character and every event seemed personal. It was wonderfully written and navigates the life of Rebecca in a quite invigorating way. I am not a jew and didn't know much about their traditions but this book was relatable in so many levels. It is heavy with feelings but sways you into reflection. Not just middle schoolers, this book should be read by anyone looking for a close knit family scape. The only weakness was the description which was partially misleading.

[Cordelia · Rating 5 out of 5]

Compulsively readable & though sad ultimately joyful

I read this book in one sitting! The structure of the story, which is mostly from "Before" but every now and again we glimpse "Now" sections really works to create narrative tension. This is a beautiful and sad book but, ultimately, I did cry some tears of joy as Becky learns how best to navigate a devastating situation. The characters in the family, particularly the parents, are well-developed and authentic. You will feel honored by the time you got to spend living inside Becky's head and heart.

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Becky is the middle kid in her large Jewish family and is especially close with her big sister. Per her rabbi father, she is not taking her bat mitzvah preparation seriously enough and that means he does not want her pursuing the all-county band. Becky forges her mom’s signature on the permission slip and tries out anyway. She shares her secret with her sister and then discovers her sister is keeping a secret of her own. Foreshadowing in the first chapter builds up to the dramatic ending in this emotional story.

[Dest · Rating 3 out of 5]

The first half of this book was a 2-star experience, the second half 4-star, so I'll average it out to a 3. The last third was seriously See You at Harry's sad, which is SUPER SAD. I didn't even like this book at first, but by the end I was crying my eyes out. An unexpected video/letter/communication from a loved one who has died always gets me!

[Liz Sues · Rating 5 out of 5]

A Beautiful Story of Family, Love and Loss

A beautifully written, warm and sometimes heartbreaking story of two sisters, their secrets and the ways those secrets impact them and everyone around them. The main character, Becky, is a smart, somewhat impulsive girl balancing her family and religious traditions against her love of music and her desire to forge her own path…but her relationship with her older sister is more important to her than anything else. Highly recommend this wonderful book!

[Rachel Chapman · Rating 4 out of 5]

CW: grief, car accident

*spoilers*

I thought this was a well done book on grief for middle grade students with a Jewish main character, featuring children of a rabbi who work hard to change their parents so-called "progressive" notions (interfaith dating, forgoing bat mitzvah, etc.). Thought this was relatable as I was also a young Jewish girl who experienced grief at a similar age. I thought the audiobook narrator was engaging.

Audiobook c/o NetGalley

[Kate Schoedinger · Rating 5 out of 5]

Don’t let the jaunty cover fool you. This story has depth. With brilliant writing that is well paced (prepare for a one sitting read) and a craft structure that drops breadcrumbs as short chapter interludes, you will be captivated to learn what exactly did happen. Family dynamics are expertly portrayed. Faith is richly explored. Dreams are shared and shattered and pieced together. Your heart will be too. Great middle school read. Can’t wait to share with students.

[Kimberly · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’d give this a 4.5, but mainly for the second part of the story. The first part was just okay for me. Nothing special. It was nice to read about a family with real values and true love and caring for each other. The second half felt so raw and real. I cried many tears on and off through the entire second part of the story. It moved me.

[LS Johnson · Rating 4 out of 5]

The author did a great job at character development. I felt like I know each of them in a unique way. Also excellent was depicting the way a younger sibling looks up to an older sibling, and the betrayal that is felt when a lie is told. The story is about family dynamics, and love, and grief and loss. I did cry and I'm not ashamed about it either.

[Lisa Hoppe · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was well written, with a lot of likable characters. While I enjoyed it, I can’t help but think it may be a bit much for the intended audience, especially if you’re just expecting some basic sibling rivalry.

[Carrie · Rating 4 out of 5]

This tender story about navigating your way towards your passions while trying to respect the wishes of your parents turned out to be quite the tearjerker. I also have sisters, so I cried my way right to the end.