You Gotta Eat: Real-Life Strategies for Feeding Yourself When Cooking Feels Impossible

by Margaret Eby

A trained chef teaches you how to keep yourself fed in the face of stress, burnout, and exhaustion—and have fun doing it.Delivery is expensive. Eating a spoonful of peanut butter is depressing. You can’t imagine having the energy to chop an onion. But somehow, you gotta eat. How does anyone feed themselves under these conditions?Enter You Gotta Eat, a friendly, accessible resource for getting something on your plate when you have too much on your plate. Part cookbook, part pep talk, and part action plan, You Gotta Eat offers tips and tactics—plus ten "do exactly this" recipes—for making effortless food that’s nourishing, tasty, and even a little fun. Choose your current energy level and learn important kitchen If you can open a Turn instant ramen into a feastIf you can assemble a Make a cheese board fit for a kingIf you can press a Whip up perfect eggs in the microwaveIf you can wield a Turn any leftovers into a hearty casseroleAnd dozens more ideas for living deliciously without impossible effort!Whether you’re burnt out, depressed, overworked, a new parent, living away from home for the first time, or some combination of the above, let food editor, classically-trained chef, and nacho enthusiast Margaret Eby show you how to make your eating experience better—and easier—in every way.

Genres: Cookbooks, Nonfiction, Food, Cooking, Audiobook, Health, Self Help

192 pages, Hardcover

First published November 19, 2024

About the author

Margaret Eby has written for the New York Times, The New Yorker, the Paris Review Daily, Bookforum, Salon, Slate, and the Los Angeles Times. Originally from Birmingham, Alabama, she now lives in New York City.

Reviews

[Stacy (Gotham City Librarian) · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’m someone who regularly eats cheap Ramen because I actually like it, but I also suffer from Depression, have very low energy and don’t know much about cooking anyway. It’s a tough combination. This book was very helpful! A thorough guide to putting meals together that aren’t complicated but will still make you glad that you made it into the kitchen.

I instantly liked this author’s tone. Eby understands how difficult it is to accomplish the most basic of tasks when you have both Anxiety and Depression. She’s also funny without trying hard to be funny, which is a pet peeve of mine when reading Nonfiction. She keeps it light and informative.

It isn’t one of those books that’s a lot of filler, like longs sections of personal backstory with an occasional recipe or tip. The book is packed with instructions and suggestions for what to cook (or put together without cooking), as well as easy hacks and substitutions. I loved that there were alternatives and creative options offered for pretty much everything she covered, illustrating how easy it is to experiment with ingredients.

Eby tells you how to throw an easy sandwich or soup together with all sorts of weird combinations of things that you’re likely to already have in your kitchen and may not have thought about. (Just two examples. There are many different food categories included!) She covers all sorts of flavors that go well together and encourages you to try various things. Nothing is off limits if you’re hungry and need to eat something! And yes, there are very simple recipes included. It’s not like when you see one on the internet that claims to be simple and then lists thirty rare ingredients you’ve never heard of.

One FYI: This is not a resource specifically for healthy eaters. (American cheese is mentioned a LOT.) It’s a resource for putting together food that is convenient for you, and while it is possible to do healthier versions of some of it, a lot of the meals covered are most easily compiled with what I would consider junkier ingredients. Also, if you’re the kind of person who’s a stickler for rules in the kitchen, like using the “correct” pan for cooking things, this book is definitely not for you.

Eby includes a section on grocery shopping and foods that last a long time in the pantry but are best for making a quick meal, foods that last a while and can be used for seasoning, etc. So handy!

Oddly enough, reading this made me want to experiment more in the kitchen! I found it inspiring.

Do not read when hungry!! It will be agonizing.

[Kate Kiriakou · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you've ever thought feeding yourself every damn day is the hardest part of being an adult, this book is both validating and genuinely helpful. It's equal parts cookbook and pep talk with a bunch of ideas on how to feed yourself when it feels like the last thing you want to do. Honestly, I'm probably going to buy this for weeks when I go to create a grocery list and completely blank on all possible meals.

[Jess · Rating 3 out of 5]

I have been responsible for basically every meal I have eaten since I went away to college almost 25 years ago. I had a relatively good process for that going and then in late 2022, I was told I had to start counting carbs for medical reasons, and just a few months after that, I was told I had cancer. And for the last six months I have been fighting thumb tendinitis for which I am supposed to wear a brace as much as humanly possible.

What I am saying is that as sick of making decisions about food as I was before 2022, I am a billion more times more sick of it now.

And there's nothing in this book that I didn't really know about meal ideas, but what it crystallized for me is that I am SHOPPING wrong for low effort meals. I am still shopping like I'm going to meal prep a specific thing, when what I really need to be doing is stocking things that will allow me to assemble lots of different low effort meals because I get sick of those even faster than I did the thing I was meal prepping for the week. Do I know how I am going to make that shift? No. But at least it's an action item.

[Jamieson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Maybe you’re thinking, “logging a cookbook, really?” And also, “does this guy need to be on anti-depressants?” But this book has zero pictures in nearly 200 pages and is less a traditional cookbook than a collection of tips and tricks for how to best use the random stuff lying around your fridge and pantry. I feel more creative and experimental after reading it which feels like a W

[Crowinator · Rating 4 out of 5]

I wish this book had existed when I was a graduate student and lived alone and tried to learn to cook from a myriad of recipes from books, magazines, and handwritten ones from my mother. I tried to like cooking, but mostly I resented the time it took to feed myself, and while I could occasionally pull off my go to meals (chicken in jarred pasta sauce and mozzarella melted in the pan), I remember one memorable night when I went from dipping celery into peanut butter, to dipping chocolate into peanut butter, to just eating peanut butter with a spoon.

This book starts by calling out to both past me and present me, who still hates cooking: "If you're feeling like you just might opt to starve to death if nobody invents a way to teleport food directly your mouth in the next 48 hours, this book is a place to start." It's packed with smart ways to think about what makes up a meal; uses for dying vegetables or year-old canned beans or boxes of mac and cheese and instant ramen that we all have; and clever hacks to make food go from merely edible to tasty; all while showering you with positive reinforcement for merely being able to enter your kitchen in the first place. It has a few recipes but it's more of a self-help guide.

The best part about this book? It's so funny. I snort-laughed my way through it, while learning how to make the easiest mug cake from ice cream ever, a basic lentil stew, a curry, and a chili, as well as how to make a lot of things with eggs. I've been microwaving my eggs ever since I learned that I could, and this book legitimized it for me. Eby made sheet-pan meals and stir-frys feel actually doable.

I still hate cooking, but at least I am now married to someone who likes it, but even she gets burned out and exhausted at the thought of making dinner, AGAIN, after already making dinner before, night after night. I'm not going to offer to make dinner but I might hand her this book.

[Cait · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is really solid - I like the approach and there are some genuinely great ideas in here. Would make a great gift for someone moving into their first apartment etc

[Iona Sharma]

This is a brilliant book by a food critic and trained chef who understands that sometimes people can't physically cook, it's too much, there's nothing in the house, etc, but they need to eat somehow, and, crucially, everyone is in that boat some of the time. So I would like this book for that alone, but the author is also very funny and I chuckled to myself a lot while reading her recipes. I wish she had written other books, on any subject! So there we are.

[Panda · Rating 3 out of 5]

Audiobook (5 hours) narrated by Erin Moon
Publisher: Blackstone Publishing

Erin Moon is an award winning narrator. I'm not sure how she did it but she took the author's words and ran with it. She not only made this book her own, but she nailed the humor and is the main reason why I kept on going after the suggestion of a pineapple and mayonnaise sandwich. Not joking. Not going to try it, but if you have had this, think it sounds good or give it a try out of curiosity or some sort of warped sense of self punishment, let me know how it goes. I am seriously interested.
The audio is fine and without flaw.

I found this to be more humorous than a recipe book, which makes sense as she is being real about depression as well and working hard to let her readers know that it's OK, you got this.

The reason I picked it up was because it's only 5 hours long and curiosity. I like to cook and cook more by ideas and feel, so listening to a book that seems like it could have some ideas sounded like a good plan. The first part was pretty gross. I mean, you do you and eat what you want but some of the suggestions were yea, just not in my wheelhouse, but then she gets into some interesting and good stuff.

There's a section on humus that is pretty good. I've made humus myself and sometimes new recipes, especially for those who are anxious in the kitchen, can seem daunting. Margaret Eby simplifies it so much and with her humor she gives making humus the casualness that the preparation deserves while giving huge props to the taste of fresh made. This one is a good one as she also gives alternatives for ingredient swaps and also is really good about emphasizing that you are free to make things yours and to your taste, which a lot of people need to hear.

I will spoil one recipe that she drops that is a great one and am glad that she included it as it is so simple, cheap to make, and tastes fancy and expensive. It's Macella Hazan's onion, butter, tomato sauce. Literally an onion, some butter, and tomatoes; either fresh or canned:
https://food52.com/recipes/13722-marc...

While I give the book a three stars for me personally, she nails so much. Eby is funny, gives personal anecdotes, is constantly cheer leading both for cooking and also for getting through the day with depression. I appreciate all that she put in and think that for a lot of people a print copy to dogear, writes notes in, highlight or whatever or a kindle version to quickly search for ingredients is going to be extremely helpful. I have friends who are very skittish in the kitchen and this is a great jump off point, with or without depression. Of course I am unsure of what the formatting looks like in the print version but given the efforts of the audiobook I am assuming that Eby put some effort in there as well.

This is one of those books that I would consider giftable. I would give it a once over or a listen first to make sure it fits your persons personality as I could see that some may find such a gift offensive, pineapple is such a controversial ingredient and all.

[Murani Reads ✨ · Rating 5 out of 5]

wow okay this was actually amazing. super helpful and i will be buying a physical copy of this book. i absolutely loved all the tips and tricks that were in this book. super helpful for a young adult trying to learn to cook for themself that only knows ramen or a full 20 step meal recipe. i loved it!!

[Grace Stafford · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thanks to the publisher and Edelweiss for the eARC! This is a helpful "cookbook" (more of suggestions for cooking, rather than specific recipes) for keeping yourself fed. Lots of pantry-stable meals and quick ideas that will keep you away from easy fast food/delivery options.

[Amanda · Rating 5 out of 5]

They should give these out to every college freshman and anyone starting antidepressants (there's definitely an overlap in those two groups too). This is the guide I needed about 5 years ago, but also still need today because burnout as an adult is so real. Cooking just sucks when you're tired and this is full of useful hacks and ideas to make it through dinner after a long day. What I appreciated most is that there's enough variety in here that it can be used time and time again without growing old. I would have appreciated a few more recipes, but the quick formula breakdowns are so useful I'll be referring to this often.

Thanks for the arc!

[Carina Stopenski · Rating 5 out of 5]

thanks to netgalley and the publisher for a free arc of this title! this is 100% a fantastic title for those who struggle with a variety of conditions that may make cooking a little extra difficult. eby's instructions were kind and in no way condescending the way that i sometimes find those "easy" cookbooks. i appreciated that while there were recipes here, it was primarily an explanatory text that could let folks make their own decisions through with thorough description. definitely going to be using some of this book's techniques on low spoons days!

[Emily Williams · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is such a gift. As a mom of two small children, I’ve been dealing with major cooking burnout. I love that the author normalizes and validates the natural ups and downs of our energy levels and relationships with food and cooking. She’s a professional chef but even she can hardly muster the energy to cook sometimes! This book gave me some great low effort meal ideas (like, truly low effort). And it also felt like a warm hug. I’ve read many “quick and easy” cookbooks that were anything but - one of them even went on about how with young kids in the house you need to get dinner on the table STAT before everyone loses their mind. I thought “yesssss thank you I feel seen!” and then the recipes took on average 45 minutes???? I wanted to throw that book at the wall. This book will not do you dirty like that.

[Eva · Rating 4 out of 5]

My never ending quest to eat well with minimal effort continues. Only one-ish chapters devoted to actually cooking things, and those things are pretty dead simple with step by step instructions. This lady gets it.

[Penny Ramirez · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was fun! It wasn't really a cookbook, more a series of lists of potential things to combine into a simple meal. There were several "do exactly this" recipes. Lots of great ideas for what to throw together when actually cooking is just too much. My go to is cheese & crackers, but now I have more ideas.

The big takeaway: as the title says, you gotta eat. It doesn't need to be fancy, and it really only has to satisfy YOU.

[Ted Trembinski · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is fun, invites you in, and was a fun cook book to listen to while running errands. I've tried plenty of these quick, no-cook recipes but really came for Margaret Eby's "get it done" attitude and approach to eating, because sometimes cooking really does feel impossible. As fun as it might be to bake a loaf of bread or simmer a curry for hours, many days required a more practical approach to enjoying food on a lower energy day. As someone who has been cooking more in the past few years, this book got me thinking of what I could swap in/out of recipes for lower-effort/intensity grocery shopping. It also reminded me that it's fine to take a break from ambitious cooking and keep feeding myself in whatever way feels fun. I'd recommend this book (as an audiobook especially) to any folks who feel like cooking is always a chore they'd rather avoid.

[R.J. Sorrento · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this on audio, and most of it works for this format since it’s not meant to be a recipe book. It’s more of an approach to making meals without needing to do a lot of preparation or major cooking. But an accompanying PDF for the audiobook would really help me visualize her ideas.

I greatly appreciate the concept of the book, and there are days where cooking seems daunting and I just trudge through it. I like having options of making a meal without always needing to cook so this book is great for ideas.

[Ashley Lay · Rating 5 out of 5]

I listened to this on audiobook and will be buying a hard copy to keep for ideas!

[Rebecca · Rating 4 out of 5]

I don't read a ton of nonfiction, but this book felt like a friend telling me it would be okay even if I'm having a hard time, with lots of ideas on how to feed myself when effort isn't an option.

[Brittany McCann · Rating 4 out of 5]

This can be helpful for a multitude of readers.

Teens, college students, single living dwellers, tired child rearers, those who are exhausted, those who are depressed, those who just need inspiration for something quick and easy when it feels like too much.

I do wish that there were more choices, but I loved the layout of the chapters in the methodology of preparation such as something you can pop into a microwave.

Worth a read, can be helpful for many.

4 Stars

[Eeculp · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great tips on cooking in the easiest possible way

[Gina · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this. It's super reassuring if you're having a hard time (hello 2025) but also hilarious and full of all sorts of ideas for meals (weird sandwich combos, alternative ways to cook pasta, inventive sauces) and little cooking tips and tricks. There are recipes here, yes, but it's mostly written in sections of text, so you can totally just sit down and read it.

[Neeyati · Rating 5 out of 5]

Super useful, creative, and validating. Meal planning is a huge mental load! It's nice to see very low effort mix-and-match options and makes me feel more curious and empowered to use up odds and ends in my fridge

[Emily]

practical ways to get sustenance

[Lex · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is what I wanted The Sad Bastard Cookbook to be. Arranged by effort, written in a way that manages to be a recipe without being bound to certain ingredients, completely without judgement. The best food is the one you can eat; it doesn't have to be good or pretty, just edible.

I think the casserole recipe is the best example. 2 cups veg, 1 cup protein, yea much binder, this much pasta, seasoning, optional cheese and crumb toppings, done. There are suggested combinations, sure, but both the basic idea and the amounts are there - a vital detail! I don't want to think about proportions or figure out binders when I'm depressed! But grab frozen veg mix, some canned chicken, and I'm already 50% done? I can do that.

There's a lot of really helpful tips. Can't be assed to clean the measuring spoons? Here's how to estimate instead. Every single veg and deli meat went bad but you want a sandwich? Heck it, try pineapple slices with mayo. No really. Just have a pantry of cans? Bean salad time baybee. Can't make a decision? Here's a table to roll dice for ingredients. No really, Random Food Tables are a thing now.

[Sydney Bonnin · Rating 4 out of 5]

this book was great, it made me want to be creative with the way I cook.

[Punk · Rating 4 out of 5]

A gentle and funny book about how to feed yourself when that seems impossible.

This book offers three things: permission, inspiration, and recipes, in about those proportions if this were a list of ingredients. The chapters are arranged in increasing order of effort, from, basically, eating straight out of the fridge, right up to chopping stuff up and turning on the oven.

Each chapter starts with a theme and a bunch of ideas about how to turn things like eggs, greens, beans, noodles, dumplings, and canned foods into a meal, then finishes with one or two basic "do exactly this" recipes. The permission is throughout. Yes, it's okay to eat popcorn for dinner. Yes, a dip is a meal. Yes, you can just eat cheese with your hands. I gotta say, though, there is A LOT of cheese and dairy in this book. And, it's true, if I could eat dairy, a lot of my eating problems would be solved, but alas.

Still, I love the energy of the book and how funny and relentlessly kind Eby is. From the introduction:

When food felt like a chore, I kept reminding myself: the best food is the food that you'll eat. This is the mantra of this book. Michael Pollan famously had three rules for eating: "Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants." That's nice for him! Here, we're gonna stop with the first one. And we're going to make it easy.

And there are a lot of easy ideas in here! Frittatas! Hummus! Smoothies! For when you're too tired to even chew!

This is more of a survival guide than a cookbook, though, as some of the cooking advice is a bit on the thin side, and if you're new to cooking, you might not know, for example, that you'll want to undercook pasta if you're putting it into a casserole, something Eby fails to mention. The book is probably best for someone who already knows the basics, but just can't imagine lifting a spoon or picking up a frying pan. Eby has a lot of suggestions for things to cook in the toaster oven and the microwave, and the most involved this book gets is casseroles and stirfrys. There are even two (2) quick desserts.

Recommended! Though if you have dietary restrictions, you'll have to do the extra work yourself to make this book work for you (just like every other day) and large sections of it might not, but I think it's still worth it for the inspiration and the reminder to go easy on yourself. You're doing the best you can.

[Rach · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the food book of my soul. If you’ve ever spent any time standing in the kitchen wondering what you’re going to eat and resorting to another uncrustable or a bag of chips for dinner, I think it will be for you, too. I know now it’s my ADHD, but as much as I love eating and delicious food, I’ve spent decades dreading what I’m going to have for breakfast, lunch, and dinner because I just don’t know what to make, or nothing sounds good, or I don’t have the energy to do more than the bare minimum of opening up package. Margaret Eby is the first chef who has ever made me feel like that’s ok, that is completely normal to not what what to eat or enjoy cooking, and that’s it’s fine to struggle with assembling a meal when all you want to do is lay in bed.

This book doesn’t just make good feel better, it also has practical information on how to assemble quick and easy meals that also taste good, organized in chapters based on how much energy you have. Eby goes over the different elements in a dish that provide good flavor and contrast, like acid vs fat, salt vs sugar, and creamy vs crunchy, and then explicitly tells you how you can achieve those combinations. From sandwiches and soups to charcuterie and oatmeal, quesadillas and nachos to sheet pan meals and more, this is the perfect guide to figuring out what you can make with what you already have lying around. And she also spells out some great shelf-stable and long-lasting staples you can stock up on in your kitchen so you always have supplies on land.

I love This book so much that before I’d even finished the audiobook from the library, I’d bought a physical copy so I can bookmark all the things I want to try, and use it as a reference during my low energy times.

Also, I 100% agree that butter is magic. YES.

[Ashley Bowers · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is exactly what it claims to be: a self-help book with strategies to keep yourself fed when you lack the energy to cook.

Eby achieves her aims as she offers strategies to make easy meals that require little preparation and/or cooking. She has a personal and genuine understanding of the relationship between food and emotions and how one’s ability to cook is affected by low motivation/energy. This comes through in her honesty, and on several occasions I laughed out loud.

I also love how she is mindful of waste and encourages the use of foods that you’d commonly keep on hand, often saving you a trip to the grocery store. Her tone is shamelessly encouraging and non-judgemental throughout, which gets extra credit from me. And an extra star because she added vegetarian & vegan options to each section.

[Reba · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love how open and realistic the author is. We've all been there, too tired to function, but we have to. Maybe we have littles to feed, or maybe our own mood and energy are dependent on us having a meal. The author's "motto" of "The best meal is the one you'll eat" definitely hits home with me. Too many times have I come home and gelt guilty for having popcorn or chips for dinner because I was too tired to do anything else besides sit on the couch and recover from my day.
The author presents you with recipes and options for healthy and healthy-ish meals made of common pantry, freezer, and fridge items. Even for people who may not have many vegetables, they are easily purchased, canned or frozen, and stored. A handful of corn or peas to liven up a ramen? Yes, please! Even a boring sandwich becomes a pleasant experience using a little something random to change the taste and texture. (I am personally a big fan of the suggestion of black beans and jalapeños in tuna to make a typically boring sandwich (or wrap) into something I look forward to.
The most "fancy" food in this book is chickpeas, and luckily, they come in cans. No talk of kale, watercress sandwiches, fancy cheeses, and no ingredients that the common grocery stores (I'm talking Walmart and Greer's) wouldn't actually carry.
Bonus points for the shopping list of basic staples to keep on hand and how long they last.