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Nesting

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An extraordinary and urgent debut by a prize-winning Irish writer, Nesting introduces an unforgettable new voice in fiction.

On a bright spring afternoon in Dublin, Ciara Fay makes a split-second decision that will change everything. Grabbing an armful of clothes from the washing line, Ciara straps her two young daughters into her car and drives away. Head spinning, all she knows for certain is that home is no longer safe.

This was meant to be an escape. But with dwindling savings, no job, and her family across the sea, Ciara finds herself adrift, facing a broken housing system and the voice of her own demons. As summer passes and winter closes in, she must navigate raising her children in a hotel room, searching for a new home and dealing with her husband Ryan’s relentless campaign to get her to come back. Because leaving is one thing, but staying away is another.

What will it take for Ciara to rebuild her life? Can she ever truly break away from Ryan’s control – and what will be the cost?

Tense, beautiful, and underpinned by an unassailable love, hope and resilience, this is the story of one woman’s bid to start over.

399 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 30, 2025

1222 people are currently reading
32300 people want to read

About the author

Roisín O’Donnell

4 books202 followers

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 1,875 reviews
Profile Image for Maureen .
1,686 reviews7,393 followers
November 5, 2024
* 4.5 stars*

On a beautiful Spring afternoon in Dublin, Ciara Fay makes a decision, a spur of the moment thing, but actually one that’s been a long time coming - she frantically grabs clothes straight from the washing line, straps her two young daughters, Sophie and Ella into the car, and drives away from her home and husband, Ryan. She has no idea what she’s going to do or where she’s even going, but the need to escape Ryan is overwhelming, not just for herself but for her daughters too.

On the face of it, Ryan Fay appears to be Mr charming himself, but behind closed doors he uses emotional abuse to control and cause utter fear- he has isolated Ciara from family and friends and she can take no more. This won’t be the last she hears from Ryan though, because he’s relentless in his pursuit of her, demanding that she returns, telling her what a bad mother she is.

With very little savings and no job, Ciara’s future looks very bleak and she becomes one of the many who rely on emergency accommodation, living in a ‘hotel’ with others in the same position, where somewhere they can call home is something they can only dream of.

Set against the backdrop of the housing crisis in Ireland, this is tense and emotionally charged, and relates just how hard it is to escape a controlling relationship and at the same time find the courage and strength to make a new life out of the tatters of a marriage - because leaving is one thing, but staying away takes enormous strength. A heart wrenching but hopeful read, and I loved it.

*Thank you to Netgalley and Simon and Schuster UK for an ARC in exchange for an honest unbiased review *

Profile Image for Canadian Jen.
639 reviews2,498 followers
April 11, 2025
Reading this was like watching a car wreck happen. You have to sit down, lean forward, cringe and try to not look away.

Imagine being in an abusive marriage with 2 kids under the age of 5 and a 3rd on the way? Your family is in another country. The gaslighting that goes on; the fear of being smothered; isolated; physically abused; being made to feel mentally unstable; the emotional stress being a constant.

This is Ciara’s story. The shame; the anxiety; the constant awareness and alertness for mood changes; the twitches. The exhaustion. The path out is hard. Sometimes a step back to go forward. Sometimes two. Restarting a life; a career.

This is a frightening look at what domestic abuse looks like. O’Donnell masterly takes us through the this emotional darkness on what it feels like to be a victim but also what it feels like to escape it and reclaim one's independence and regain freedom.
This story enraged me and shook me and will stay with me for a very long time.
5⭐️

TY to my friend Tracy for recommending and gifting this one to me 😊
Profile Image for Sujoya - theoverbookedbibliophile.
789 reviews3,426 followers
February 27, 2025
4.5⭐


“Leaving is one thing, but staying away is another.”

Set in 2018 Dublin , Nesting by Roisín O’Donnell revolves around Ciara Fay , former English teacher and presently homemaker and mother of two in her mid-thirties, who decides to take her two young daughters, Sophie and Ella, and leave her controlling and emotionally abusive husband, Ryan, after five years of marriage. This is her second attempt to escape her marriage to Ryan, who outwardly appears to be an ideal life-partner, having left him once two years before only to return soon after. Ciara’s family lives across the sea and she has no close friends she can turn to for support. Having given up her career after marriage, Ciara has only a bare minimum of funds to support herself and her children until she can find a job and is put up in a hotel room as waits for her turn on a long list of those awaiting social housing. Complicating matters further is Ryan, who oscillates between asserting his parental rights, threatening to take legal action and emotional manipulation, resulting in Ciara doubting herself and second-guessing her decision on more than one occasion. We follow Ciara, pregnant with their third child and concerned for her children’s well-being, as she navigates her way through financial struggles, homelessness, Ryan’s manipulations, and limited means of social aid as she strives to rebuild her life.

“I cannot hear myself think. I do not know who I am anymore. I do not know if I exist. I feel like a ghost. Life energy drained. A bloodless, cowered feeling.”

Nesting by Roisín O’Donnell is a dark yet realistic and emotionally impactful novel. The author writes eloquently, with insight and compassion (with minimal melodrama) as she addresses several sensitive themes including marriage and motherhood, gaslighting and emotional abuse, homelessness and much more. The author brilliantly captures Ciara’s state of mind - her fears and insecurities, her loneliness and moments of self-doubt as she navigates her way through much adversity. Ciara is a memorable protagonist and admired her courage and resilience and was invested in her journey of hope and healing.

Written against the backdrop of the Irish housing crisis, the story also paints a realistic picture of how women such situations are left to depend upon the kindness of strangers and the limited resources available for shelter, counselling and financial support. It is impossible to not be affected by this novel and reflect on Ciara’s circumstances and the difficult choices women in similar situations are forced to make and how important it is for them to have a support system to help them through the process . This is not an easy read but is definitely an important book that highlights relevant and important social issues.

Heart-wrenching but hopeful, I found this novel to be an evocative, thought-provoking read and I look forward to reading more from the author in the future.

Please note that the subject matter and certain themes addressed in this novel may be triggering for some readers.

Many thanks to Algonquin Books for the digital ARC of this novel via NetGalley. All opinions expressed in this review are my own.

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Profile Image for Lindsay L.
845 reviews1,623 followers
February 18, 2025
Happy Publication Day!

5+ stars!

2025 Favourites List! 🏆

A mothers determination to protect her children.

A heart-wrenching, eye-opening, contemplative, heavy, unforgettable story.

A mother makes a split second decision to take her young daughters and flee her abusive marriage. With no family close by to help, she finds refuge in a hotel organized through the broken housing system in Dublin. Her husband bombards her with his endless demands for her return, all while she battles her own guilt and self doubt.

I had an immediate, intense connection to the main character. Her vulnerability as a wife, mother and woman was heartbreaking. She struggles to find her own sense of identity which has been attacked, manipulated, cut down and buried by her spouses abusive behaviour. Reaching the point of desperation, she finds the strength and determination to leave to protect her children and herself, even though the future is uncertain. I felt for her with every bone in my body.

This author explores motherhood in a raw and vulnerable way that makes the reader sympathize with the characters situation. The sense of desperation and loss was palpable and gut wrenching. The overrun government housing assistance system explored the endless struggles those in need face on a daily, weekly and monthly basis full of check ins, paperwork and constant judgement and limitations.

This was a heavy and dark story but there were glimmers of hope scattered throughout that helped to propel the main character forward and keep focused on improving the family life for her children. Self doubt is a major theme explored and one many people face in these desperate and uneasy circumstances.

Support systems are key, but not everyone has this and finding outside support isn’t as smooth a process as it should be. Friendships made in these dark circumstances can often become lifelines of support and comfort.

I adored everything about this multi-layered, thought-provoking novel. This won’t be for everyone, as the story is a slow burn, emotionally exhausting, haunting and heartbreaking reading experience. It is one that I feel will be most impactful for mothers who will certainly find themselves putting themselves in this main characters situation and contemplating how they would cope.

⚠️ there are plenty of trigger warnings in this story, so please review those before reading this.

Audio rating: 5+ stars! I adored this audio narrator! She greatly enhanced my overall connection to this story and the main character in particular. Her narrative pauses and expressions were done to perfection. There are times when she is contemplating thoughts and situations and these inner narratives were heartfelt and emotional. The audio narratives changed for the children’s voices and during phone calls that echoed distantly, which enhanced the overall audio listening experience. This will be an All Time Favourite audiobook for me! I HIGHLY recommend the audiobook.

Thank you to the publisher for my gifted reading copy and audio copy of this book through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review!
Profile Image for Karen.
713 reviews1,863 followers
March 17, 2025
A very powerful and important story of a young women’s escape from an emotionally abusive
husband, a situation that doesn’t leave physical scars but is just so nasty and controlling.
The fight to stay away… when resources are slim to none and the system takes forever to help you, all
while trying to keep your young children safe throughout.
This was an emotional read… I could only read in small doses.
The setting is in Ireland, but problem is everywhere…
You will be rooting for this woman, her children, and many of the other characters .. some in the same situation.
4.5
Profile Image for Rosh ~catching up slowly~.
2,284 reviews4,625 followers
September 16, 2025
In a Nutshell: A contemporary Irish drama about a woman’s attempt to get away from her abusive marriage. Hits the right mark in terms of characters and plot, and most of all, in the depiction of psychological domestic violence. The last quarter was a bit frustrating, but other than that, this debut is worth a try. To anyone who ignorantly asks such women sufferers, “Why don’t you just walk out of your marriage?”, you need to read this novel.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Plot Preview:
2018. Dublin, Ireland. One day, after what can be called a final-straw incident, Ciara takes a life-changing decision. She packs a few essentials, grabs her two toddlers Sophie and Ella (aged four and two, respectively), and walks away from her marriage. In a city struggling with homelessness, starting anew, especially with no savings and no family nearby, isn't easy. But Ciara is determined that, unlike her last attempt at escape a couple of years ago, she will stick to her decision this time around, no matter what tactics her husband Ryan tries. But is it ever easy to break away from an abusive control-freak’s clutches?
The story comes to us in Ciara’s third-person perspective.


Domestic violence is one of most unacknowledged and underplayed crimes of modern times. This, despite that fact that it is considered a public health and safety crisis. Just a few days back, an abusive president who doesn’t deserve to be named even said that “private violence enacted by men against women in the home should not be considered criminal”, dismissing it as a “little fight with the wife”. Even worse is ignoramuses wondering in surprise or irritation, ‘If he’s so abusive, why doesn’t she just walk away?” Well, unless you have been in the same situation, you have no right to claim that an easy solution exists. This book shows one such case where the threads fray but aren’t easy to snap.


Bookish Yays:
✔ The true-to-life depiction of abusive marriages.

✔ The realistic portrayal of what happens when you get away from such a marriage. It’s not instant happiness or relief, and a lot has to be taken into account before committing to this drastic step.

✔ The highlight on the complicated realities of psychological abuse, which is rarely acknowledged as a part of domestic violence or as marital cruelty, and is tougher to prove.

✔ Ciara. A paradoxical woman in many ways. Brave yet questioning, strong yet weak, impulsive yet level-headed. It is anyway easy for us readers to root for an abused wife to stand on her independent feet, but I love that Ciara is not shown as perfect. She has her flaws and vulnerabilities, partly due to her personality and partly due to the mindgames Ryan has been playing. Her character development was layered, with her background proving how anyone is susceptible to entering such marriages.

✔ Ryan. You might wonder why I am putting an abuser in the Yay category. It’s a credit to the author, not to the character. Ryan is a textbook example of how a manipulative and gaslighting husband actually functions. I appreciate how he is not portrayed as being physically abusive (except in one crucial detail), which is what most such abusers are depicted as in fiction. He proves how abuse can come in a charming parcel.

✔ The little ones in the story, especially Sophie who isn't afraid to voice her opinion. My heart broke for them and hoped for them.

✔ The fabulous use of the first-person perspective, with Ciara’s introspection telling us her thinking without making it seem like endless rambling. You can actually feel Ciara’s uncertainty, her double-guessing of every move and word. I am rarely this satisfied with first-person internal monologues.

✔ The depiction of the housing crisis in Ireland. This isn't the first Irish book I've read tackling homelessness as well as domestic violence in Ireland, so I guess both of these might be severe issues there. I can't be sure without having first-hand information, but the portrayal in the book seems genuine enough.

✔ Though there are ample opportunities for the plot to go into melodrama, the writing keeps the emotional quotient just at the right level without making the book sound like a trauma narrative. There are sprinkles of joy interspersed among the scenes of worry and fear.


Bookish Nays:
❌ The journey towards finding your feet after a traumatic fresh start anyway takes long, but the final quarter of the book gets frustrating, especially because of certain questionable decisions and needlessly dragged situations.

❌ There’s a tiny romantic track in the story, but even that was enough to turn me off as it simply wasn’t needed. Can't a woman find happiness on her own?

❌ The ending might work for many readers but I thought the resolution a bit too smooth and convenient for such a story.


🎧 The Audiobook Experience:
The audiobook, clocking at 9 hrs 46 min, is narrated by Louisa Harland. I had mixed feelings about her performance. She read Ciara’s parts well enough, and her Irish lilt suited the character. However, she just couldn’t handle the children’s dialogues, voicing them in a very weird old-granny kind of voice. Sophie has quite a lot to say in the book, so this odd voice was a big turn-off. I wish the narrator had been tested on their ability to voice a child convincingly.
One thing I liked about the audio version was the special sound effect it used to make a phone conversation sound real, with the opposite person's voice coming in a tinny-through-the-machine way. Well done.


Overall, this is exactly as you would expect a book on such a story to be. It is realistic, it is gritty, it is intense. But it is also slow and repetitive. Most of the plot sticks to the core focus, which is especially commendable of a debut work. If the final quarter had been finetuned, I would have rated this higher. But even in its current form, this novel mostly lives up to the high standards in which I hold contemporary Irish literary fiction.

Recommended to fans of OwnVoices literary fiction dealing with tough topics. The book does get intense, so read it only when you are in a strong headspace.

4 stars.


My thanks to Hachette Audio and Algonquin Books for providing the ALC of “Nesting” via NetGalley. This review is voluntary and contains my honest opinion about the audiobook.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Profile Image for Kate O'Shea.
1,234 reviews177 followers
December 15, 2024
This is not an easy read. I had a visceral reaction to it to the point where my feet were kicking the table and my fists clenching. I'm just giving you the heads up.

Nesting follows the story of Ciara and her children - Sophie, Ella and (eventually) baby Noah. Ciara has been subjected to coercive control by husband Ryan from early on in their marriage and despite leaving once she has always been persuaded by him that her place is with him. But this time she's not going back even though it means an uncertain existence for herself and her children.

Nesting is one of those books that I have nothing in common with, having been lucky enough to be married to a truly wonderful man for 27 years. However I am a woman and the feeling of outrage at Ciara's situation, as I read this book, was almost overwhelming at times.

I have no personal experience of coercive control but Ciara's story affected me deeply. Following her story through all it's disturbing phases was quite shocking but I also thought it an important and interesting read. Perhaps it will help others to recognise the same signs or perhaps it would encourage a person being subjected to coercive control to get away.

Excellent. Highly recommended. I should note that GR has this down for being published in February but Amazon says 30th January.

Thankyou to Netgalley and Simon & Schuster for the advance review copy.
Profile Image for Christy fictional_traits.
300 reviews317 followers
January 9, 2025
'I cannot hear myself think. I do not know who I am anymore. I do not know if I exist. I feel like a ghost. Life energy drained. A bloodless, cowered, head-spinning feeling'.

Ciara is married with two, young, gorgeous, daughters. Her husband is handsome, charming even, and her house is lovely. But no one knows what goes on behind closed doors. Ciara's sister and mother, away in England, know the type of manipulative, gas-lighting, acidic personality and emotional abuse Ryan has wielded throughout their marriage; slowly corroding Ciara's sense of self-worth. However, one day, as isolated and fearful as her life has become, she realises she needs to get out. Taking only the bare minimum she packs her car, a handful of cash, and her two girls, and goes. But to where? She soon comprehends the strength it takes to leave is nowhere near the strength it takes to stay away, find a new home, find herself, and create a new life, 'Maybe she got it wrong. Maybe he's a loving husband and she was the problem all along'.

'Nesting' is a tough, emotional read. O'Donnell does a great job evoking the terror, loneliness and hopelessness of escaping a toxic relationship, only to find yourself abandoned within the system. The strength and courage to navigate both, while attempting to build a new life must seem utterly insurmountable and terrifying. Yet this is a very real problem. This is a growing issue that needs to be highlighted, better understood and addressed.

O'Donnell signs off her acknowledgements, 'To anyone trapped in a place that does not feel like home, and anyone who has ever been asked the question 'why don't you just leave?', this book is for you'. Yes, it is, but it is also for all of us who need to better understand the hopeless sea that some women are forced to swim in, and across, in order to live a life both they and their children deserve.
Profile Image for Helga.
1,346 reviews425 followers
August 15, 2025
The story centers on a pregnant woman with two kids who runs away from her emotionally abusive husband and tries to find shelter and safety.
Profile Image for Sandysbookaday (taking a step back for a while).
2,556 reviews2,444 followers
February 7, 2025
EXCERPT: 'Here, let Mammy have some of that.' She takes a bite of Ella's ice cream, aiming to get rid of it before it melts completely. The sweetness makes her stomach turn. She can feel Ryan watching closely. 'Oh, God. The state of them. Ice cream is never that brilliant an idea, is it?'
Ryan says nothing. Here it is. The start of another of his silences.
A headache is building at the base of her skull. Her body, flooded by the uncanny sense that she's trapped. Stuck in this bright day forever. She's invisible, walking unseen through the crowds. Other women are happily herding children, holding partners hands or strolling with friends, talking. Her little meandering family blends in perfectly, so why are these dark thoughts swirling again?
Two years since she returned to Ryan. A couple of months since she stashed the wetsuit money in the nappy bag on some blind impulse. A flush of guilt, as if she's a smear on the perfect day, sullying the moment. She remembers that wartime painting she once saw in the Tate on a school trip to Liverpool. People on a merry-go-round. From a distance they looked happy. It was only when you looked closer that you could tell they were screaming.

ABOUT 'NESTING': On a bright spring afternoon in Dublin, Ciara Fay makes a split-second decision that will change her life. Grabbing an armful of clothes from the washing line, Ciara straps her two young daughters into her car and drives away. Head spinning, all she knows for certain is that home is no longer safe.

It was meant to be an escape. But with dwindling savings, no job, and her family across the sea, Ciara finds herself adrift, facing a broken housing system and the voice of her own demons. As summer passes and winter closes in, she must navigate raising her children in a hotel room, searching for a new home and dealing with her husband Ryan's relentless campaign to get her to come back.

Because leaving is one thing, but staying away is another.

MY THOUGHTS: If you have ever looked at a woman and her relationship and thought 'I don't know why she doesn't leave him,' you need to read Nesting by Roisín O'Donnell. Nesting is the heart-wrenching story of Ciara Fay and her struggle to leave her emotionally abusive husband and build a new life for herself and her three children.

Over the years, Ryan has steadily isolated Ciara from her family, her friends. Where do you go when you have nowhere to go? Isn't she just imagining the coercive control, the veiled threats? Who is going to believe her? Everyone loves Ryan.

Nesting is a story of fear, of courage, of resilience, of falling down only to get back up again. There were times, reading and listening to Nesting, that I struggled to breathe, Ciara's struggles oh so painful that at times they seemed futile.

O'Donnell has done a masterful job of conveying Ciara's desperation, her fears, her uncertainty. Could it be that it's her that is wrong, is the problem? That Ryan is, as he keeps telling her, a loving and kind husband and father.

But if you're thinking this is a depressing read, you'd be wrong. It is inspiring. It is hopeful. In places I snorted with laughter at the children's antics. But they're not angels - far from it. They are unsettled, frightened, whiny, defiant. But they are also loving and Ciara will fight with everything she has to give them a loving and stable home life.

I wish I'd had this book when I was married to my 'Ryan'.

A stunning debut novel. A 'must read', and a book that will stay with me for a long time.

I loved both formats of this book but slightly preferred the audiobook due to the superb narration of Louisa Harland.

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

#Nesting #NetGalley

MEET THE AUTHOR: Roisín won the prize for Short Story of the Year at the An Post Irish Book Awards in 2018, and was shortlisted for the same prize in 2022. She is the author of the story collection Wild Quiet, which was longlisted for the Edge Hill Short Story Prize and shortlisted for the Kate O’Brien Award.
Nesting is her debut novel.
She lives near Dublin with her two children. (Source: roisinodonell.com) (abridged)

DISCLOSURE: Thank you to Simon & Schuster (Australia) for providing an e-ARC and Hachette for providing an audio ARC of Nesting written by Roisín O'Donnell and narrated by Louisa Harland for review. All opinions expressed in this review are entirely my own personal opinions.

https://sandysbookaday.wordpress.com/...
Profile Image for Suz.
1,537 reviews823 followers
July 26, 2025
This is one of those 10 out of 10 moments. Nesting caught my eye from the very beginning, I saw a clip on the cover design, and was immediately drawn in. The audio was a beautiful delivery, directly into my ears with a beautiful accent and perfectly crafted characters from toddlerhood to old age. The use of adapting the telephone calls was very effective also, transmitting all the emotions. And that’s what this story is, the gamut of emotions. Ciara is a good mother, a beautiful friend when she was allowed to be, and a good daughter, sister. She was a dutiful wife, a wife who was squashed from all sides by a sickening man, raised by sickening parents. The parents as side characters raised my ire each time, calling their appalling son by using his second name ‘Ryan Patrick’, referring to him in a God-like manner. Ryan terrorised his wife, never once looking after the children, methodically and consistently chipping at her psyche in every waking hour. Realising one day while out in the garden, that she must remove her young family away from this man, she grabs the clothing on the line and takes off. The housing crisis in 2018 does not bode well for her, but as this beautifully written story progresses, we witness a woman utterly focused on working to get away, and stay away from this man. Making the break was doable, just, but how can she stay away with VERY limited means. A strong woman emerges, a woman who does not yet know she is with child. Facing an abusive man she throws her life on the line, and that of her girls, in an attempt to live on her own. This reads as a thriller, I was captivated at every turn, and stayed up well into the night many times. An enthralling read as we watch this mother look over her nest in fierce protection. This is a brilliant read, one that I highly recommend. If I didn’t accept my book gluttony, I’d go and buy this right now. I loved it to bits.

I listened to this via the Libby app and my public library.
Profile Image for Brenda ~The Sisters~Book Witch.
980 reviews1,016 followers
March 16, 2025
Love, Hope, and Resilience in the Face of Fear

You know those stories that hit deep—the ones about resilience, fear, survival, love, and the fight for independence when everything feels stacked against the protagonist? The kind that makes your heart pound, your breath catch, and your emotions spiral between hope and heartbreak?

Well, Roisín O’Donnell takes that and dials up the tension. This literary domestic drama is infused with thriller-like intensity, raising the stakes for Ciara and her children. It’s gripping, gut-wrenching, and refreshingly different—the kind of story that keeps you up way past your bedtime, needing to know how it all plays out.

The Fight to Break Free

Ciara’s story is one of emotional abuse and survival. Fleeing a domineering husband, she and her children are thrown into Ireland’s housing crisis, feeling vulnerable with nowhere to turn.

But here’s what makes Ciara unforgettable—she shows us exactly what true strength looks like. It’s not about being fearless. It’s about being terrified but fighting anyway. She does what she has to do to fight for herself, her children, and a future beyond the broken system —even when the odds feel impossible.

Meanwhile, her husband? The opposite of strength. He needs fear to feel powerful. While Ciara fights for survival, he fights to control, using manipulation, threats, and bullying to keep her under his thumb.

A Reminder of the Vulnerable

I couldn’t help but think about how many people will slip through the cracks in this time of economic struggle and coercive control. Ciara puts a human face on the countless people who feel trapped, unheard, and helpless—abandoned by a system that should protect them.

Quiet Yet Unflinching Storytelling

The writing is subtle yet deeply powerful, pulling you in with an emotional urgency while still allowing you to feel hopeful. There’s no over-the-top drama—just the raw, unfiltered reality of what it means to be trapped while fighting your way out.

A Triumph in Empathy

Nesting is a triumph—not just in storytelling, but in its ability to rekindle empathy for the vulnerable. As I turned the final page, I felt a deep sadness, wondering if we’re heading toward a future where empathy is being eliminated, and soon, it may be something we only read about.
Profile Image for Kat.
454 reviews26 followers
January 23, 2025
5 stars!
In her novel, Roisín O'Donnell brilliantly describes two major issues. First is the way one functions in an abusive relationship. How the abuser plays mind games, how he plants seeds of self-doubt, and low self-esteem in his victim's head, and how easily he influences and manipulates the other person. The victim is convinced that nothing is wrong for many years and defends the perpetrator making excuses and justifying his actions. Outside of the relationship, outside of the house the perpetrator often is seen as a decent person, they live among us undetected for decades.
It`s good to see that the author caught so many small details that often are overlooked or even ignored, such as constant stress, voices inside screaming horrible things (you're a bad mother, you're stupid, you're ugly, nobody will love you like I do, etc.). There's a scene when Ciara finally talks to someone about her situation. In a shaky, shy voice she explains that her husband was never physical, he never punched her. This made me stop and think. When people talk about their trauma, their experiences, especially women tend to say this as if their suffering is less dramatic, less important, and not as bad as those who experience physical violence. As if they're sorry that they dare to ask for help which they probably don't deserve, because things aren't that bad. Families of alcoholics do the same - my husband wasn't violent, sorry for suffering less than you, maybe I shouldn't be here? Why do we do this?
The second thing that Roisìn does well is describing the broken Irish system. When Ciara leaves her husband she immediately finds herself homeless with no help whatsoever. She ends up in a hotel in emergency accommodation on a floor of shame. The hotel put all the non-guests on one floor with strict prohibition of using the lifts and the main lobby so those who pay for the rooms won`t see those in need. Invisible people, people in hiding, people of shame.
The novel is set in 2018. Coincidentally this is the year when me and my family were forced to leave Ireland because we became semi-homeless. I was working two jobs seven days a week and had decent pay. My husband had a decent job and a decent salary, too. Yet when our landlord decided to sell the house we quickly realized that the only way for us to survive was to leave Ireland. I worked with homeless people so I knew how bad things were, oh the irony! It's 2025 now and I hear from my Irish friends that things are worse, way worse.
This heartwrenching book should be given to the authorities, to make them aware of how serious the problem is and what it does to people who aren't yet another number on a spreadsheet. Also, this book stands in opposition to the myth that the homeless are all drug users and they are in this situation on their own wish. Nobody wants to live on the streets, nobody deserves that kind of life, and don't think that this won`t happen to you.
Profile Image for Thomas.
1,830 reviews11.7k followers
May 3, 2025
A strong debut novel about a woman leaving her emotionally abusive husband. I appreciated how Roisin O’Donnell portrays the difficulty of leaving an abusive partner, both on a logistical and emotional level. She doesn’t sugarcoat the gaslighting, manipulation, and meanness that can occur in cases of domestic abuse. I also liked how she showed that emotional abuse is still so damaging and yet, people underestimate the impact of emotional abuse, even those who are themselves experiencing it.

I did find O’Donnell’s writing a bit predictable on the sentence level. However, this novel has an important message so I can see why people support it.
Profile Image for Книжкові  історії.
193 reviews197 followers
September 3, 2025
Найнебезпечніше місце для пташки — це гніздо. Найнебезпечніше місце для жінки — дім. Це сильна книжка, мене вразила.

Опис емоційного абʼюзу — на висоті.
Реалістичність переживання героїні — наче на власному досвіді писано.

Але історія не лише про втечу від абʼюзера. Вона також про те, як жінки опиняються в сірій зоні суспільства.

У «Гнізді» описуються конкретні житлові проблеми в Ірландії. Але авторка бере і показує, що найбільше від цього страждали найменш захищені громадяни — жінки і діти. Підставте сюди будь-яку іншу проблему, але сенс не зміниться. Жінки і діти завжди страждають найбільше. Але про них говорять найменше.

Вийти із сірої зони дуже складно. Тому що суспільство має захотіти тебе побачити. Чи готові ми побачити?

P.S. Якщо не сподобалась романтизація абʼюзера в «Покинь, якщо кохаєш» — читайте цю книжку. Якщо вам сподобався роман «Покинь, якщо кохаєш» — читайте цю книжку.

Цитати:

«Але чому, коли вона думає про причини відʼїзду, усе здається таким хитким? Навіть учорашній вечір здається розмитим. Коли вона намагається відтворити свої спогади, картинка тріщить, немов пошкоджена плівка. А в шлунку, немов морська хвороба, підіймається відчуття жаху. Невже вона й справді щойно зруйнувала свій шлюб без жодної на те причини? Хто взагалі так чинить?»

«Два роки тому, коли вона уперше пішла від нього, повернулася уже через три тижні. І, коли повернулася, відчуття покарання було настільки очевидним, що здавалося, його можна було відчути на дотик. Будинок був брудним. Вона мусила відчищати засохле лайно з унітазів і відмивати застиглий жир із плити. Відтоді він завжди казав, що кожна переміна його настрою, кожен спалах гніву — це її провина, бо саме стрес через її відʼїзд змушує його так поводитися. Вона дала йому ідеальний привід».

«Твій чоловік тебе не бив? Це з біса дуже мило з його боку. Не забудь написати йому й подякувати».

«За останні кілька місяців вона отримала тисячі повідомлень, лавину. Вона скролить, робить скриншоти, знову скролить, аж поки не заболить голова. Його поведінку так складно довести. Деякі із цих повідомлень можуть здатися милими, якщо не знати контексту».

«ʼУяви, що тобі треба підняти зі столу цукерку «Скітлз» бамбуковими паличками, коли ти дуже пʼянаʼ. Саме так це відчувалося. ʼТи намагаєшся концентруватися на виборі наліпок на стіни в той час, як постійно тушиш пожежіʼ.».

«— Не знаю. Чи достатньо погана ситуація, щоб звертатися за заборонним приписом?
— Ви не мусите чекати, доки ситуація стане достатньо поганою, люба. Багато жінок померло від цього чекання.»
Profile Image for Mai H..
1,332 reviews734 followers
March 20, 2025
St. Patrick's Day 2025 #1

I. Before Thunder

I know Ciara isn't supposed to be likeable. And I don't like her. But I'm not married to an emotionally abusive man who I want to escape. I know children complicate matters. I felt so horribly when she tried to fly out with the kids and was stopped by passport control. How dare he?

II. Shelter

I still don't like Ciara, but I can recognize that her situation is complicated. I won't argue that Ryan is terrible, but as this is first-person POV, and I've been burned before, I'm not entirely how sure I can trust Ciara. Is that bad?

III. Moon-Skulled

If you don't trust your husband, why would you let him get you pregnant again? I am obviously still having issues with Ciara. And just about everyone else. ESH

IV. When We Were Birds

I know I keep saying everything is complicated, but custody is complicated. Ciara doesn't want Ryan to have an overnight. Great, he probably doesn't deserve it. But to be quite honest, she looks terrible on paper, and if I'm going to be more honest, even from this first-person POV. I said it.

V. Learning in Braille

Honestly, I'm just angry at this point. Ciara is making the stupidest decisions. Why leave the country? And I know Ryan has custody rights, but if you don't trust him, maybe stick around? Dumbass.

VI. Anseo

Short, but not sweet.

Overall, a solid book, but maybe not for me. I give most Algonquin books 3+ stars. Alan seemed to enjoy this one much more than me, so maybe check out his review instead.

📱 Thank you to NetGalley and Algonquin Books
Profile Image for Beata .
889 reviews1,370 followers
March 18, 2025
Domestic violence covered under subtle appearances is the main theme of the novel, well-developed and giving insight into what lies hidden from the eyes of the outsiders. Ciara Fay makes a decision to leave her marriage built on appearances, and what she faces is not what she expected. And she is not alone, she has small children with her, which makes her flight much, much tougher.
The most interesting part of the book is Ms O'Donnel's efforts to depict a woman's loneliness and helplessness and holes in the social system which is supposed to reach out to women like Ciara.
*Many thanks to Roisin O'Donnel, Hatchette Audio, and NetGalley for a free audiobook in exchange for my honest review.*
Profile Image for Bobby.
102 reviews15 followers
July 15, 2025
I’m so angry that I need to cool down before writing a proper review. I’ve never highlighted a book so much. Narcissists are the WORST! My best friend dated one and I kept saying JUST LEAVE, but it’s not that simple and I couldn’t understand at the time. Now I would and that’s why this book is so important. You can better understand a friend in this situation or identify if you are being subjected to intimate partner abuse.

To all the men out there doing this to their partners, go fuck yourselves and rot in hell.
Profile Image for Marialyce .
2,213 reviews679 followers
May 11, 2025
To know this life is to live it.

There are many wonderful men in the world but Ryan Fay is not one of them. He is manipulative, controlling, a liar, and has over the years made his wife Ciara. more and more fearful that she and her children are in danger.

In an act of bravery, Ciara leaves with her children and tries to find a safe haven for herself and the girls, winding up in a state funded program in a one room hotel where she is able to make friends once again.

With family in England and she in Ireland, this seems to be her fate as Ryan pursues her through numerous texts and finally enables a lawyer, who secures visitation rights for Ryan. Ciara is more and more terrified, but she is discovering an inner strength that she thought Ryan had destroyed. Added to all of that Ciara is pregnant an eventually has a baby boy.

Will she go back to Ryan and live in fear or will Ciara go forward on her own to discover a better life for herself and her beloved children?

This is a story that many women can relate to. These predator men know the woman to pick women who are kind, easy to intimidate, and have no outlet to go to. However women are resilient and many have found a way out of this quagmire they find themselves in.
Profile Image for Kristine .
951 reviews271 followers
June 25, 2025
Just Announced: Nesting has been Long-Listed for the 2025 Women’s Prize for Fiction! Congratulations 🎉 This is my favorite awards competition.

Really moving. Set in Ireland. Ciara has been trying to make her marriage work since she has two daughters and now is pregnant. Ryan wants her to come home, but isn’t likely to change. Her family doesn’t live in this country. Shows how difficult it is to leave a domestic violence situation. Where do you go and how do you get stability again? This is rarely well confronted and full services are lacking.

Hope Ciara can get away and live a life of peace. This was such a realistic book, I felt as if I was reading a memoir. Ciara has to struggle each step of the way. The courts do not make life easy for her. She endured years of emotional abuse. Her husband would put her down, have rages, insisted on having sex when she was not interested, and than downplay his actions. Yet, when she leaves and he is not supporting his children since he feels Ciara must give in and reconcile, she is left with young children and having to figure out housing. She is told it will look bad if she doesn’t have permanent housing, yet how can she arrange that without a job and what can she do with her children? It is very difficult.

Excellent book and very Realistic Look into the Circumstances that force women to endure toxic relationships.
Profile Image for Fran Hawthorne.
Author 19 books260 followers
February 17, 2025
"Nesting" is one of those rare novels where the plot and writing are so powerful that I had to step away every now and then, just to breathe. If only Ciara Fay, the protagonist, could escape so easily from the manipulation and gaslighting of her husband, Ryan.

The pair were married six years earlier after a whirlwind courtship, and Ciara gave up a job she loved, traveling around the world teaching English, to settle with Ryan in Dublin. It didn’t take long for the pattern to begin: Ryan variously criticizing, belittling, gaslighting, manipulating, and seducing Ciara. She had tried to leave him two years before the book opens, getting as far as her mother’s home near Manchester, England. But she was unsure and scared, with a newborn and a toddler. Ryan lured her back.

Now, pregnant again, Ciara abruptly realizes that she can’t stay any longer. While Ryan is in the shower, she gathers damp clothing from the clothesline, her small hoard of cash, her daughters’ passports and favorite toys, and not much else.

Over the next few months, Ryan alternates among sweet-talking, mockery, insults, and threats of a custody battle. Meanwhile, Ciara and her daughters crowd into a welfare hotel room that reeks of “stuffy ironed polyester” as she tries to juggle a part-time job, morning sickness, the girls’ childcare, her looming custody hearing, the hotel’s rigid rules, her shrinking bank account, and the hopeless quest for an affordable apartment that will take government housing vouchers.

What’s so important is that this is not a story about physical abuse. That might leave injuries that are easily visible. It’s about psychological abuse and marital rape, which are much harder to explain to outsiders.

Here’s an example of how Ryan operates, as he pushes Ciara to let him visit the girls:
“ ‘So you’ll bring them over and leave them with me?’
‘Yes.’
‘A few times a week?’
‘Sure.’ How many days is ‘a few’? She’s annoyed with herself for being vague, placating as always.
Ryan shakes his head. ‘What’s the plan here? Do you even know what you’re doing? I’m worried about you, honestly.’ "

This debut novel’s only serious problem is the portrayal of Ryan. He and his parents are two-dimensionally evil. (His charm is simply one of his tools, so it doesn’t count as a likable quality.) The story would be even more powerful if readers could see qualities that still tempt and confuse Ciara.
(Reviewer’s note: This book was undoubtedly more painful for me than for most readers, because I lived through a horror story too much like this one. And I can tell you: The author gets it.)
(Adapted from my review in the New York Journal of Books https://www.nyjournalofbooks.com/book...)
Profile Image for Tracy GH.
728 reviews101 followers
March 6, 2025
My second 5 star ⭐️ read this year!

Once I picked this up I could not put it down. The first chapter grabs you. The words feel urgent, moody and threatening.

This story is about a young mother getting away from her abusive husband. She is emotionally and sexually abused and understandably, she has very little confidence. The kind of abuse that leaves no bruises or marks.
“It is hard to imagine what happened here. But isn’t that the way? A crime scene yields no emotional evidence. We stand on the battlefields waiting for the voices of history to hit us, and all we hear is birdsong.”

She leaves him and as these abuser’s often do, they manipulate and beg for forgiveness. Yet, even though she is living in a hotel, (due to the housing crisis!) she begins to find friends and strength that she did not know she possessed. The problem is not getting away, it is staying away.

Just gobsmacked by this one. I am working today on very little sleep but it is so worth it. This will be in the Top 5 of my reads this year. 🫶🏼 🇮🇪 ☘️

“Under the shelter of others, people survive.”
Profile Image for Lynn Peterson.
1,140 reviews298 followers
June 9, 2025
4.5 An excellent novel that everyone should read to hopefully have a bit of insight into the life of an emotionally abused woman, and therefore have more compassion for people who are hurting so badly. This is a hard novel to read at times and I wished so much for strength and courage but I feel like this book was a great example of the questions someone must ask themselves time and time again before finally leaving.

The novel also shows the compassion of the Irish to help women who find themselves in this situation.
Profile Image for Emmkay.
1,370 reviews143 followers
April 3, 2025
A really good debut novel about a mother trying to escape her husband’s coercive control. Ciara has two preschool aged daughters and only the spending money husband Ryan allots her. She lives on pins and needles, anticipating his explosive temper and withering comments., fearing he’ll become violent. Her self-esteem is shot, but she reaches her breaking point and flees with her daughters, entering Dublin’s broken social services system as she attempts to build a new life, all while having to continue to interact with Ryan over their shared children.

No showy writing, no melodrama or improbable twists, but rather a solid commitment to social and emotional realism. The system may be slightly different in Ireland than in Canada, but so much was recognizable - some of my volunteer work is at a shelter that serves women and their children fleeing gender-based violence, and I thought this both rang true and gave me additional insights into their experiences. Interesting that some of the reviewers have commented about their frustration with Ciara, but it seemed very realistic to me to show how a bold young woman can get worn down by coercive control, continue to question her own judgment, and take a less than linear path forward. It’s ‘predictable,’ but in the sense that it is true to life, and shows how a certain pattern unfolds. I also enjoyed the recognizable Dublin details.
Profile Image for abi slade.
222 reviews4 followers
February 6, 2025
2⭐️

pros ✅
- very quick read
- some moments of real pathos and warmth when Ciara was with the kids (like at Christmas)

cons ❌
- extremely predictable
- Ryan (as the main antagonist) felt extremely caricature-y throughout
- very repetitive and slow plot? like it felt like the same things just happening over and over. it could’ve reached the climax 100 pages earlier
- very bleak, very few moments of levity
- did not like that Ciara and Diego’s relationship became romantic, not necessary at all
Profile Image for Aoife Cassidy McM.
803 reviews367 followers
January 10, 2025
I’m struggling to recall a character in a book I’ve hated as much as I hate Ryan in Nesting, or a character for whom my heart ached and my anxiety soared as much as it did for Ciara, the protagonist in this sensational debut novel by Irish writer Róisín O’Donnell.

I found myself recoiling in horror as some of the scenes in this book. A more tense, compelling and emotional read you will struggle to find.

Ciara is a stay at home mum (and qualified teacher) of two children. She’s from Sheffield but living in Dublin,
married to Ryan, a handsome man from Monaghan who swept her off her feet before revealing his true character as a controlling, sanctimonious, narcissistic abuser.

At breaking point, Ciara bravely makes the decision to leave Ryan one afternoon, taking their two children with her, and it’s the story of her life from this day on, told in an urgent, stream of consciousness-style narrative that is simply unputdownable. I would have read this book in one sitting had time allowed. I read it over two evenings furiously turning pages.

What makes this book such a difficult read is the reality that it is based in - Ireland’s ongoing housing crisis, where in the absence of alternatives arising from successive governments’ failed housing policy, homeless families are accommodated in hotels, sometimes for years. This book will make you so angry and break your heart too, knowing there are many families in Ireland living in these same conditions, with little hope of securing a place they can call home.

My first five star read of 2025, Nesting has universal appeal but will hit Irish readers especially hard. Unputdownable, compassionate, important, brilliant. 5/5⭐️

Many thanks to Scribner Books and publicist Gill
Hess for the gifted arc. As always this is an honest review.

Tw: coercive control, psychological abuse
Profile Image for Stephanie.
390 reviews95 followers
June 9, 2025
Sometimes a book comes along that grabs you from page one—and Nesting by Irish author Roisin O’Donnell is exactly that. I can’t even recall how I stumbled upon it, but I’m so glad I did.
It was by pure chance I checked this out on my Libby and it was available. Pure luck I read the first few pages and became fully invested.
Also only the third five star read of the year for me. Longlisted for the 2025 Women’s Prize for Fiction.

Published in February, Nesting hasn’t seen much traction in the U.S., but it’s been a hit in the UK and Ireland, and rightfully so. There’s a precision in O’Donnell’s prose that feels rare, and honestly, it’s something American writers often don’t quite capture in the same way.

The novel follows Ciara, a mother of two young girls who unexpectedly becomes pregnant with a third. She’s been emotionally abused for most of her marriage by her husband Ryan, a man who has isolated her from friends, family, and any chance at a career. She’s barely hanging on—a shell of herself—until she decides to leave.

When she attempts to flee to her mother’s home in London, Ryan blocks the children’s passports. With what little money she’s managed to hide away, Ciara turns to social services and finds herself placed in a government assigned hotel, where an entire floor is set aside for women like her. Forced to take the back stairs, she decorates with a Christmas tree and lights, finds dollar store presents for the girls, meets survivors holding on to whatever they can live on.
There, with a rice cooker and fierce determination, she begins to rebuild. She learns how to make do, lands a low-paying teaching job, and meets others trying to start over too. Some of the minor characters stand out. Immigrants, students, family, you won’t soon forget them.

There were so many moments I wanted to scream, “GET OUT!” or “STOP TALKING TO HIM!” But O’Donnell handles this with nuance as it’s not that easy. When someone’s been psychologically broken down for years, escape isn’t a clean break. The book reminds us of that over and over again.

Nesting hums with desperation. You can feel it in your bloodstream. It reads almost like a thriller. How and when will she finally get out? You’ll find yourself on edge the entire time, thinking of the millions of women living through similar horrors.

I’m so glad this book found its way into my life. Easily one of the best books I’ve read all year.
Profile Image for Dem.
1,251 reviews1,408 followers
October 17, 2024
A heart breaking and emotionally charged story that had me racing through the pages with my heart in my mouth. A story of domestic abuse and coercian that is extremely well told.

On a bright sunny afternoon in Dublin Ciara Fay makes a difficult but necessary decision that will change her and her young family’s life forever. She walks out on a life of torment into the unknown with just a bag of clothes and very little money to start over.

This is an important story and I could not stop thinking about the characters. What it takes for a women walk out of a relationship with two small children without any means of support and a more important question is what it takes for women to stay in an abusive relationship.

The author captures the the fear and terror of Ciara and the real struggle of staying or leaving. A heartbreaking story but a very real look at what it takes to navigate the system and the desperation of a mother to protect her children.

A book that will stay with me a long time. The question of “ Why do women stay in an abusive relationship” is heartbreakingly answered here. This would make a terrific book club read.

My thanks to NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review this book.
Profile Image for Nat K.
512 reviews228 followers
June 15, 2025
***Longlisted for the Women’s Prize 2025**

”Leaving is one thing, but staying away is another.”

This is very much a book about the psychological cat & mouse game of a marriage unravelling, made all the harder with such young children involved, including a babe in arms.

What happens when the glow of love becomes tarnished?

Ciara Fay had always longed to live in Ireland where her Mum originally hailed from. It seemed like a dream come true when after finishing her studies and travelling the globe as an English teacher, she returns home to Sheffield. At her thirtieth birthday celebrations she meets and falls in love with Ryan. It’s a whirlwind romance and within three months they’re wed, and she’s moved to Dublin.

Fast forward to a five and three year old daughter later, and Ciara is a shadow of her former self. She no longer has any friends, and contact with her family is fleeting. Nights are spent with her back against the bedroom wall of her daughter's room, where she stays awake. To protect her babies and to protect herself.

”Nights like this, she knows this is real, she’s not imagining it. The fear is bright, animal, sure. Pure blue at the heart of a flame.”

And yet Ryan has never laid a finger on her. It’s all emotional and psychological abuse. He is charm personified. The type of man any woman would be lucky to have.

Even from just reading the first few pages I had an uncomfortable feeling in my gut at how frightening Ciara’s situation was to take a chance and pull clothes off the line, bundle them in the car, along with her daughters and just drive.

This story highlights how broken our social system is. How little available housing there is when you’re searching in good circumstances, let alone in dire straits and fearful of what tomorrow may bring.

Domestic violence is insidious, as there aren’t always bruises to show for it. I’m loathe to say it, but there were small moments where Ryan seemed so believable in his love for Ciara and his daughters - so repentant - that I wondered if she was perhaps suffering from post partum depression. He played the game so well. To add another level to the complexity of Ciara’s life she finds out after leaving that she is pregnant again.

Nesting shows the absolute strength and determination of a woman to create a home (in this case in a hotel room) when all the odds are against her. As they are against all of the other families living on level five of the Eden Hotel.

I read this practically in one sitting on this rainy Sunday, which is a rarity in itself. It was so easy to get involved in the storyline, and want to know how it would end. Hopefully not as another statistic of domestic violence. It upset me so much as mention was made in this novel of a real life case here in Australia where a young mother and her three young children were set alight in their car. There are too many tragedies that have already occurred and sadly are undoubtedly yet to occur.

I don’t know what the answer is.

For those living in Australia 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732 and 1800RESPECT.org.au is the national sexual assault and domestic family violence and counselling service. MensLineAustralia can be reached on 11300 789 978 for men experiencing abuse, or who are concerned about their own behaviour. For overseas readers, please reach out for help via your local helplines.

In her Acknowledgements Roisín O’Donnell says:
”To those in family hubs, hostels, hotels and refuges, and those sleeping in friends’ spare rooms and on sofas, hidden from official statistics. To anyone trapped in a place that does not feel like home, and anyone has ever asked the question ‘why don’t you just leave?’ This book is for you.”

Such a powerful début novel.
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