Confessions of a Recovering Slut: And Other Love Stories

by Hollis Gillespie

The next "screamingly hilarious"(Miami Herald) installment in the wild ride that is the life of Hollis Gillespie. Confessions of a Recovering Slut is the hilarious and often heartrending sequel to Bleachy–Haired Honky Bitch, which concludes with Hollis Gillespie, the daughter of a missile scientist and an alcoholic traveling trailer salesman, at last finding a home of her own. Unfortunately that home just happens to be in one of Atlanta's most dangerous crack neighborhoods–but the place is bound to improve, right? Wrong. In Confessions, Gillespie is plagued by missing human torsos, murdered policeman, and a drug dealer who keeps setting fire to her neighbor's house–and all this after Hollis discovers that she is inexplicably (except, maybe, for all that acrobatic sex) pregnant. While the neighborhood might have been fine when she was a child–free urban pioneer, it's a nightmare for a mother with nothing but cake pans to bulletproof the baby's room. Gillespie must depend on her three best friends, Daniel, Grant, and Lary, to help her–although Lary makes it no secret that he hopes the paint fumes she inhaled early in her pregnancy will cause the baby to be born inside out–"that way it'll be easier to sell for parts." Will Gillespie ever feel safe? No matter, she's still Hollis at heart–and, as Lary points out, if not safe, at least "safe from ever being normal."

Genres: Humor, Memoir, Nonfiction, Essays, Autobiography, Biography

272 pages, Paperback

First published June 28, 2005

About the author

Hollis Gillespie is a humorist, syndicated columnist, NPR commentator and top-selling author. Her column can be found monthly on the back page of every issue of Atlanta magazine.

Hollis has appeared on the cover of numerous publications including Atlanta magazine, Creative Loafing and Tampa’s Weekly Planet. She has been profiled in Marie Claire, Bust, Writer’s Digest and Entertainment Weekly.

Her television appearances include The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, TBS Storyline, Monica Kaufman’s Closeups, Good Day Atlanta, and an upcoming appearance on TV Land. Her radio commentaries appear regularly on National Public Radio (NPR) and Georgia Public Broadcasting.

In 2004, Writer’s Digest named Hollis Gillespie a “Breakout Author of the Year.” Other accolades include “Best Columnist” (2001, 2002, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009) and “Best Local Author” (2004, 2005, 2006, 2008, 2009) honors in the Creative Loafing Best of Atlanta Readers Survey. Atlanta magazine awarded her “Best ‘Tell-All’” in 2006.

The film rights to her first book, Bleachy-Haired Honky Bitch: Tales from a Bad Neighborhod, are currently under option with a major Hollywood studio.

Reviews

[Eva-Marie Nevarez · Rating 1 out of 5]

I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it and that is almost unheard of for me. I think this will be the third or fourth book in my 'couldn't finish' list and I read A LOT. I almost always plow through a book no matter what but it wasn't happening here.
I think Hollis Gillespie has some talent hidden somewhere but I think the main problem, as I see it anyway, is she tried entirely TOO HARD. I got to page 97 before I gave up and the longest "chapter" was three pages. Okay great. Now, to put forth some humor in three pages isn't difficult. I can do that myself. But to put forth the humor and then try to turn it around into the most serious of situations and dispense what I assume is supposed to be life altering advice is insane in my eyes.
I can save anyone looking to read the book for a chuckle the time right here and now. The funniest part, in all its glory, is right here: Our trailer wasn't so bad either. There was carpeting on the floor and blankets on the beds. But the front door was about as substantial as one you'd find on a kitchen cupcoard in a real house, and every step you took in the place made it shake like a boxcar, a constant and unwelcome testimony to its impermamnence.
That's it folks, that's the best it gets in my opinion. I chuckled at that paragraph.
I just don't see how someone can try to be their absolute funniest and then all of a sudden turn around and slam you with seriousness at its best. She writes about her fear of spiders and all of a sudden, true to form, she gets a life altering lesson from a neighbor with no legs to "step on it". From here on out I assume she stomps her fears away. She writes and laughs about her having fourteen car wrecks and then, can anyone guess? Gets real serious about her parents failed marriage and their inability to rebuild when "the damage around them matched the damage they felt inside." (This damage was supposed to be similar to the damage to her vehicles.)
If this is good writing then I need to set aside an hour a day and start typing.
Her other books are coming off my to-read list faster than any before it ever have. But.....
to take a book off our to-read list is something that should not be done without significant thought. What if one day you want to read this book and cannot remember the title and in the end, cannot find the book?
hahahahahahahahah

[Susan · Rating 4 out of 5]

One supposes that a reader could read this book simply to feel the rush of relief that suddenly his/her problems don't seem so bad, or their friends don't seem so crazy, or their life decisions don't seem so out of whack. There's no denying that the book offers plenty of potential there. After all, we're glimpsing a world where friends routinely break into each other's homes (to plant prank evidence of a orgy that never happened, or just to steal all of someone's tequila), the annoying neighbors next door are drug dealers and crack whores (in the most literal sense), and situations where the most logical solution to a theft problem might be to decorate the outside of your home with religious icons and crack lighters. What some readers may not expect however, is Hollis Gillespie's talent for packing an emotional wollop, sometimes at the moment when it's least expected. There's plenty of material for tragedy,(such as her mother's decline into cancer)which is overtly poignant but some of the stories that pack the most impact are the ones that sneak under the radar, the hints of stories behind stories: a gradual distancing between sisters or an unconventional business friendship. Altogether, the author has created a situation that it's clear she's knows only too well: what a reader might initially expect to be a one night stand suddenly becomes a lot more complicated.

[Keely · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a native Metro-Atlantan, I appreciate being reminded of the beauty of my hometown... specifically the crackheads and whores and prostitutes that litter the city. Hollis is the queen of "hook 'em with the first line" and has a knack for twisting painful circumstances into hilarity. I think I enjoyed this one even more than Bleachy-Haired-- she has several stories about becoming a mother, what I kept hoping for in the first. I like reading memoirs with lots of swearing and grit. If you do, too, then you should read this.

[Marissa · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a great plane read--lots of small chapters that are hilarious an quick to read. (I always have to look up and people watch in airports, so this was good--I could read and look up and not miss anything.) Gillespie has a great style and distinct voice, very sarcastic and funny. I do have to admit that part of why I liked her is that she lives in Atlanta, and many of the places she mentions are places I've been to. Worth a summer read, definitely.

[Beth · Rating 1 out of 5]

First of all, I'll admit, I bought the book because of the title. Unfortunately, the title is the best thing about the book. It's a disappointment - repetitive and not funny. It was pure torture to read, and I only finished it because my husband and I tallied up how much I've spent on Amazon.com in the last 5 years. Figured I should get my money out of this book. :)

[Becky · Rating 1 out of 5]

I was really disappointed with this book. I've read several blog to book authors and enjoyed them, but this one couldn't keep my attention. I didn't feel like there was a theme that tied the story together, and because of that I couldn't develop any attachment to the story. I was definitely bummed - really wanted to enjoy it.

[TX Poppet · Rating 2 out of 5]

Loved the first one, but this was just the same stories repeated again. Skip it.

[Grace · Rating 1 out of 5]

Another stunner from the school library. People, please think twice about donating obscure books to Thai schools where Thai literacy is a more pressing problem.

[Bonobro · Rating 1 out of 5]

reading this was like taking bad crack- the predictable formula was simultaneously addictive, yet aggravating to the point of fury, where I would slam the book shut and throw it against a wall with outrage that such banal "prose" could be compared to something as wonderful as David Sedaris. The next afternoon, after work, I would go to where it fell in the corner, flip it open and repeat the whole process. I'm bummed I bought it. don't buy it.

[cat · Rating 1 out of 5]

not as compelling as expected...less david-sedaris and more bitter-cynic-at-the-end-of-the-bar-who-does-not-understand-the-need-for-alone-time

[Melissa · Rating 3 out of 5]

Bleachy Haired Honkey Bitch was a little edgier than Confessions, but I enjoyed Gillespie's sophmore effort as well. She is sharp and funny and sometimes heartbreaking. Book # 3, here I come!

[Leslie · Rating 5 out of 5]

hilarious.

[Jeannie · Rating 1 out of 5]

This was probably one of the most boring and unfunny books I've tried to read in quite some time. Honestly folks I gave up on page 73. Not for me.

[Mayet · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very funny and occasionally heartbreaking glimpse into Hollis life.

[Shilo Parcel · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have been reading stories from Hollis Gillespie for years since she began writing regularly in the Atlanta weekly paper, "Creative Loafing." While reading this book, I had to remind myself several times that I did not actually know this author, I just felt like I did. Gillespie's writing style is conversational and entertaining, making the book an easy and enjoyable read. Her honesty and vulnerability are admirable, and her humorous anecdotes provide a refreshing perspective on some of life's most challenging situations. Although the book is primarily centered around Gillespie's personal experiences, it also touches on broader themes of mental health, sexuality, and gender roles, making it a thought-provoking read. What sets this book apart from other memoirs is Hollis' unapologetic honesty. She doesn't try to sugarcoat her mistakes or portray herself as a victim. Instead, she owns her past and shows us how she's grown and learned from it.

[Sherry Peek · Rating 3 out of 5]

Gillespie has a quick wit and writes with very descriptive, off-the-wall metaphors. I enjoyed this book of quick short stories. Each one seems to start off wacky with a life lesson at the end. I did feel that all the wit and metaphors sometimes seemed to weigh down the story instead of enhance it.

[Paige Johnson · Rating 2 out of 5]

It should be funny but there’s something a little too try-hard about it, like Fran Drescher’s frumpy friends loudly swapping NY date stories in public. Which is especially odd because the author’s background is so opposite that: white trash trailer girl, so maybe I should try her first book Honky B!tch instead. Also, it’s weird to dedicate to it to your “daughter when she turns 13.”

[Victoria · Rating 4 out of 5]

Another great books of stories by Hollis. A majority of them deal with her now having her daughter and what it means to be a mother while still trying to have part of her old singles life.

[Marianne · Rating 4 out of 5]

Enjoyable and occasionally funny look at life.

[Jenny · Rating 5 out of 5]

Registered on Bookcrossing - https://www.bookcrossing.com/journal/...

I read this in 2008, I remember laughing out loud. Fabulous humor book.

[Linda Galway · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5
Some of this book is writing is just terrible and then some are very cleverly funny!

[Melissa Rutledge · Rating 3 out of 5]

I had read her first book "Bleachy-Haired Honky Bitch" several years ago when it first came out, so I was really excited to read her sequel to it. I have to say I didn't love this one as much though. It still had the same spunk and essay format as its predecessor, but somewhere in the pages it lost some of the fieriness. Maybe it's because she had a kid? I'm not sure. Every essay in this one had a very bittersweet tone and the book as a whole got very repetitive (I know these are meant to be stand-alone essays, but it made it difficult to read the book all the way through). I still love Hollis though!

[Marisa · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book was horrible. I recently have had a bad habit of starting books and disliking them and throwing them aside to pick up something better. I dislike this quality in myself and decided to change my ways, boy was I disappointed that I had to finish this. I was expecting laughs, I did not laugh out loud once. All that can be said to cheer me up is that I am glad that I did not pay for this book and it was a loaner from the library. It was depressing. It also made me feel that books like these are the ones that make the average person think they can write a book. I have far funnier stories to tell than this woman. I can't begin to understand how she was published more than once.

[Lanyisha · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book had a lot of short stories in it. So it was easy to put the book down and then come back to it at a later time. The author of this book also uses voice. I read this book before I read My Boyfriend Wrote a Book About Me so this is when I really began to pay attention to voice. I feel like the author used it appropriately because the book consisted of a lot of short stories put together. So I really could not imagine this book written without a good sense of voice to support it. The technique of voice could be used to show writers when it is appropriate to use voice as a writer. I think it is best used in books like these that share personal quirky short stories.

[Chelsea · Rating 3 out of 5]

OK so this book grew on me. At 1st I didn't like it at all and thought since this is a sequel and I had not read the first book...I still ended up liking this author at the end. I felt sorry for her life and that even though she has been around the block a few times, she still came out a good person. I felt sorry for the loss of her parents and the fact that her siblings and herself were forced to grow up in some unusual situations. Roll with the punches and come out like a diamond in the rough.

[S · Rating 3 out of 5]

Eh. This lady spends a maddening amount of time saying the same things over and over. It wouldn't be so bad if they were just abstract theories, but actually they are stories... things that happened to her in real life... you'd think that when writing a book (or two) you would be aware of the stories you did tell and did not. Maybe she had some amount of pages to fill in a publishing contract? Overall though, I did like some of the things she had to say and I enjoyed the liberal use of curse words in creative ways.

[apocketnovel · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book is so stupid, badly written, ridiculous and infuriating. It doesn't make sense, the grammar is atrocious, the time lines are all messed up. Structure, what's that?

I will finish it, I will finish it, I will finish it.

I hate reading bad books but I pretty much always finish them. If I can't finish them, they probably belong in the bin.

I don't know who Holly Gillespie is but she should leave writing to writers.

Finished it, it was utter crap. Don't bother!

[Kate · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book. It had all of the humor, all the friends you loved and all the "Hollis-ness" of "Bleachy Haired Honky Bitch," with a little more of what is touching and emotionally effective about it. Of course it is more emotionally involved as Hollis writes about becoming a mother and all that that entails.

[robin · Rating 2 out of 5]

I like Hollis Gillespie..but these essays are so similar to those in Bleachy-Haired Honky Bitch that it doesn't make sense that she published this one. She also has a tendency to overuse certain words/phrases and it annoys me. Funny, though.

[Jeanette · Rating 3 out of 5]

Eh...it was ok. I've read some of the other stories..repeats?...it was an easy read. I like that she's a Flight attendant and lives in Atlanta, but the stories were super scatter brained and all over the place. There wasn't a flow, which was annoying.