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This Is Me Letting You Go: Tentang Melepaskan, Merelakan, dan Memaafkan
Melepaskan selalu menjadi hal yang tak mudah bagimu. Sebab, dunia ini mengajarkanmu untuk selalu menjaga semua yang kamu cintai.
Meski sialnya, terkadang apa yang kamu cintai dapat berakhir--bahkan jauh sebelum dirimu siap.
Dan kamu harus tetap menggulirkan hidup beserta semua kepahitannya. Dan terus mencari bagaimana caranya melepaskan, merelakan, serta memaafkan. Maka, bacalah buku ini yang ditulis untukmu, hatimu, dan perasaanmu.
Meski sialnya, terkadang apa yang kamu cintai dapat berakhir--bahkan jauh sebelum dirimu siap.
Dan kamu harus tetap menggulirkan hidup beserta semua kepahitannya. Dan terus mencari bagaimana caranya melepaskan, merelakan, serta memaafkan. Maka, bacalah buku ini yang ditulis untukmu, hatimu, dan perasaanmu.
168 pages, Paperback
First published April 8, 2016
2911 people are currently reading
33477 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 1,361 reviews
June 5, 2020
I had no clue before reading that this was the mastermind behind one of my favorite sayings: the people we meet at the wrong time are actually just the wrong people. Which I shared last year in my review for Rania Naim's All The Words I Should Have Said.
Source
In this series of 30 honest and poignant essays, Heidi Priebe explores the harsh reality of what it means to let go of the people and situations we love most - often before we are ready to – and how to embrace what comes next.
I couldn't have picked this up at a more precise time in my life. This Is Me Letting You Go was exactly the kind of reaffirming book, full of genuine, wide-open hearts, I needed so badly to back me up. And I’ll be sure to circle back to it time and again. Which is why I'm going to share some of those invaluable pieces of writing so that I can come back to it:
I’m Texting You This Because I Like You
“I’m not texting you the link to this website because I think you’re actually going to like it. I mean you might, and that would be great, but I mostly just want your reply. What do you think of this thing that I find funny? What in your mind lines up with mine and where does it deviate? What do I enjoy that you despise? What do you analyze that I glaze over unnoticed? I’m texting you this because I want to know your thoughts on something – anything, really. Your mind is an infinite library that I would like to peruse for a while.”
Oh, how I love that last line...
The Truth About Meeting Someone At The Wrong Time
“The right people don’t make you hmm and haw about whether or not you want to be with them; you just know. ”
Read This If You’re Worried That You’ll Never Find 'The One'
This essay challenged my perception a lot, and I am beyond grateful for it doing so. This one question, in particular, liberated me: “But imagine for a second that you knew – with 100% certainty – that you were never going to meet that person. What about your life would that knowledge change?”
I will never tire of having a collection that makes you stop to think its points over! Though I didn’t agree with all the sentiments shared, it was so refreshing to read pieces of writing I thought would veer towards the usual cliche, but instead, it surprised me by talking about various topics in a deeply relatable way that aligned with my beliefs.
“So stop looking for The One to spend the rest of your life with. Be The One.
And let everybody else come searching for you.”
Read This If You Feel Like It’s Taking You Too Long To Move On
“If there’s anything I wish we could talk more about it’s the in-between stages of letting someone go. Because nobody lets go in an instant. You let go once. And then you let go again. And then again and again and again. You let someone go at the grocery store when their favorite type of soup is on sale and you don’t buy it. You let them go again when you’re cleaning your bathroom and have to throw out the bottle of the body wash that smells like them.”
...
“The truth is, none of us want to think of ourselves as works in progress. We want everything to happen instantaneously: Falling in love, falling out of it, letting go of what we know we ought to leave in the past and moving on to whatever comes next. We hate the in-between spaces – the times when we’re okay but not quite there yet. The periods where we suspect that growth is happening but have nothing to show for it.”
Here Is When You’ll Get Over Your Ex
“Some part of you knows better – that you have to wait this out. You have to take it in waves. You know that someday you’ll forget their birthday and they’ll forget yours too and until that day you keep yourself busy. You keep moving. And you keep letting the small details slide.”
“You will not get over your ex all at once. You’ll get over them through a series of tiny, tender moments that bring you quietly back to yourself.”
Just Be The One Who Cares More
“Being the one who cares less makes us feel cool and suave. But never anything more than that. It can’t even begin to compare with the excitement of meeting someone you are CRAZY about. Someone who lights up your day with every subtle interaction. Someone you cannot wait to see again. Someone you suddenly want to spend every waking moment with, even if that’s crazy and impulsive and happening way too fast. I know it’s a trial to be the one who cares more. But it’s also the most enthralling, fulfilling feeling and I’d like to urge you not to sell yourself short of it.”
This thought randomly brought me to Ron Swanson's “Never half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing.”
“Be the person you wish you were dating.”
Here Is How You Stop Waiting For Someone To Come Back
“You stop waiting for someone to come back through a series of slow, deliberate steps that move you away from the life you thought you’d have and towards the one that’s waiting for you.”
“You have face forward toward the future you hadn’t planned for and the life you didn’t know that you would lead. ”
When You Have To Leave The Best Things Behind
“There’s nothing more difficult than walking away from what we love before we’re ready to. Even when every fibre of our being understands that we must go, we want to stay. We want to linger. We want to find a loophole or shortcut that allows us to have it all. We forget that there’s a future. Some incorrigible part of us so easily forgets that there are good things ahead. Better things ahead, even. And perhaps that’s what we need to understand the most fully when we’re facing those times of transition – that all our best moments aren’t all behind us.”
As one wise woman once said:
“Just because the scene in the rearview mirror looks nicer than the scene on the road ahead doesn’t mean you’ll never reach another beautiful destination. It just means you’re not there yet.”
This quote made me fully understand the power of words.
As you can see by the many, many quotes I inserted, I’m so relieved and glad that this collection didn’t peak at the 'timing being wrong' phrase I shared at the start of my review. I went in not expecting much and it blew me away. What a barrier breaker!
“The future we want will not arrive without our participation.”
And it goes without saying that some fitting music had to be played during my reading experience.
Note: I'm an Amazon Affiliate. If you're interested in buying This Is Me Letting You Go, just click on the image below to go through my link. I'll make a small commission!
This review and more can be found on my blog.
Source
In this series of 30 honest and poignant essays, Heidi Priebe explores the harsh reality of what it means to let go of the people and situations we love most - often before we are ready to – and how to embrace what comes next.
I couldn't have picked this up at a more precise time in my life. This Is Me Letting You Go was exactly the kind of reaffirming book, full of genuine, wide-open hearts, I needed so badly to back me up. And I’ll be sure to circle back to it time and again. Which is why I'm going to share some of those invaluable pieces of writing so that I can come back to it:
I’m Texting You This Because I Like You
“I’m not texting you the link to this website because I think you’re actually going to like it. I mean you might, and that would be great, but I mostly just want your reply. What do you think of this thing that I find funny? What in your mind lines up with mine and where does it deviate? What do I enjoy that you despise? What do you analyze that I glaze over unnoticed? I’m texting you this because I want to know your thoughts on something – anything, really. Your mind is an infinite library that I would like to peruse for a while.”
Oh, how I love that last line...
The Truth About Meeting Someone At The Wrong Time
“The right people don’t make you hmm and haw about whether or not you want to be with them; you just know. ”
Read This If You’re Worried That You’ll Never Find 'The One'
This essay challenged my perception a lot, and I am beyond grateful for it doing so. This one question, in particular, liberated me: “But imagine for a second that you knew – with 100% certainty – that you were never going to meet that person. What about your life would that knowledge change?”
I will never tire of having a collection that makes you stop to think its points over! Though I didn’t agree with all the sentiments shared, it was so refreshing to read pieces of writing I thought would veer towards the usual cliche, but instead, it surprised me by talking about various topics in a deeply relatable way that aligned with my beliefs.
“So stop looking for The One to spend the rest of your life with. Be The One.
And let everybody else come searching for you.”
Read This If You Feel Like It’s Taking You Too Long To Move On
“If there’s anything I wish we could talk more about it’s the in-between stages of letting someone go. Because nobody lets go in an instant. You let go once. And then you let go again. And then again and again and again. You let someone go at the grocery store when their favorite type of soup is on sale and you don’t buy it. You let them go again when you’re cleaning your bathroom and have to throw out the bottle of the body wash that smells like them.”
...
“The truth is, none of us want to think of ourselves as works in progress. We want everything to happen instantaneously: Falling in love, falling out of it, letting go of what we know we ought to leave in the past and moving on to whatever comes next. We hate the in-between spaces – the times when we’re okay but not quite there yet. The periods where we suspect that growth is happening but have nothing to show for it.”
Here Is When You’ll Get Over Your Ex
“Some part of you knows better – that you have to wait this out. You have to take it in waves. You know that someday you’ll forget their birthday and they’ll forget yours too and until that day you keep yourself busy. You keep moving. And you keep letting the small details slide.”
“You will not get over your ex all at once. You’ll get over them through a series of tiny, tender moments that bring you quietly back to yourself.”
Just Be The One Who Cares More
“Being the one who cares less makes us feel cool and suave. But never anything more than that. It can’t even begin to compare with the excitement of meeting someone you are CRAZY about. Someone who lights up your day with every subtle interaction. Someone you cannot wait to see again. Someone you suddenly want to spend every waking moment with, even if that’s crazy and impulsive and happening way too fast. I know it’s a trial to be the one who cares more. But it’s also the most enthralling, fulfilling feeling and I’d like to urge you not to sell yourself short of it.”
This thought randomly brought me to Ron Swanson's “Never half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing.”
“Be the person you wish you were dating.”
Here Is How You Stop Waiting For Someone To Come Back
“You stop waiting for someone to come back through a series of slow, deliberate steps that move you away from the life you thought you’d have and towards the one that’s waiting for you.”
“You have face forward toward the future you hadn’t planned for and the life you didn’t know that you would lead. ”
When You Have To Leave The Best Things Behind
“There’s nothing more difficult than walking away from what we love before we’re ready to. Even when every fibre of our being understands that we must go, we want to stay. We want to linger. We want to find a loophole or shortcut that allows us to have it all. We forget that there’s a future. Some incorrigible part of us so easily forgets that there are good things ahead. Better things ahead, even. And perhaps that’s what we need to understand the most fully when we’re facing those times of transition – that all our best moments aren’t all behind us.”
As one wise woman once said:
“Just because the scene in the rearview mirror looks nicer than the scene on the road ahead doesn’t mean you’ll never reach another beautiful destination. It just means you’re not there yet.”
This quote made me fully understand the power of words.
As you can see by the many, many quotes I inserted, I’m so relieved and glad that this collection didn’t peak at the 'timing being wrong' phrase I shared at the start of my review. I went in not expecting much and it blew me away. What a barrier breaker!
“The future we want will not arrive without our participation.”
And it goes without saying that some fitting music had to be played during my reading experience.
Note: I'm an Amazon Affiliate. If you're interested in buying This Is Me Letting You Go, just click on the image below to go through my link. I'll make a small commission!
This review and more can be found on my blog.
November 3, 2024
Because the last thing this world needs is one more indifferent person. If you're the only one left with passion, then use it. Use the hell out of it. At the end of your life, go out with a bruised-up, worn out heart that gave too much and loved too strongly and felt too fiercely.
(from "just be the one who cares more")
▴▴▴
i acquired this book when i had my heart broken in 2019, along with how to survive the loss of a love. i read about half of both books, picking them up here and there when i needed some solace and healing. i was deep in a reading slump at the time, so i never finished either book. but lo and behold, i had my heart broken again in 2021, and it was finally time for me to finish this is me letting you go.
these essays are extremely short and digestible, which can be a good thing when your heart is hurting and your head is foggy. it's easy to whiz through just a few pages at a time.
and a lot of the pieces are helpful and resonant, but many of them are too short and vague to really say anything. i'm not sure if this is priebe's style, or if it's typical of thought catalog books, but there are some pieces that lack substance and depth. it's also fairly repetitious.
definitely not a thorough guide to moving on and healing, but it can be a nice companion while you figure it out for yourself.
some morsels of wisdom worth remembering:
To love without expectation, you have to be okay with yourself. Okay with opening your doors, spreading your arms, barring your heart and understanding that not everyone is going to be gentle with it. You have to know that you can recover from those aches, that you can heal your own wounds, that you can trust yourself to walk away from the situations that do not grow or aid you.
Because here's the thing about placing expectations on others: at the root of expectation is need. Need for others to accept you, to validate you, to tell you that you're good and worthwhile and strong. And if you can do that for yourself - if you can live up to your own expectations and desires, then the need for other people to do so disappears. The need to bend over backwards, to accommodate others, to seek validation from those who do not deserve your heart, disappears.
(from "here is how you love without expectation")
▴▴▴
...none of us want to think of ourselves as works in progress. We want everything to happen instantaneously: Falling in love, falling out of it, letting go of what we ought to leave in the past and moving on to whatever comes next. We hate the in-between spaces - the times when we're okay but not quite there yet.
...
We have to be patient with ourselves as we move through the parts in between the where we've been and where we're going. We have to let the chasm motivate rather than dishearten us. It's okay to not be there yet. It's okay to be unsure of every step that you take forward. We don't talk about how moving on sometimes feels like we're fighting every part of our most basic instincts, but we should. We should talk about how growth is often every bit as painful as it is beautiful.
(from "read this if you feel like it's taking you too long to move on")
▴▴▴
some of my other favorite essays:
"here is when you'll get over your ex," which talks about how we absorb pieces of those who are closest to us, so we can never fully rid ourselves of these people. we have to accept that parts of them are now parts of ourselves.
"what we forget when we say the timing's wrong," which is about how amazing it is that out of all the years of life on this ancient planet, we managed to occupy the same time and space as the people we love. with this perspective, there is no valid hemming and hawing about timing. if we want to make things work in the time that we have, we are capable of doing so. it's all about how much we actually want it.
and perhaps my favorite piece is "please delete my number." it's quite short, so here it is:
Because I’m going to miss you. Because you’re going to pop into my mind on a rainy Sunday evening when Bon Iver is humming in the background and I’ve poured myself a tall glass of wine and a whiff of your old cologne catches me suddenly off guard – lingering in the apartment like an unwanted house guest who was never invited to stay.
Please delete my number. Because I’m going to want to call you when I apply for that job you always said that I should go for, or cut my hair in that way I never dared to or get that dog we always talked about getting and don’t know who to text its eager picture to. I’m going to want to call you when the Bills win and when the last snow melts and when each long, wine-saturated night draws to a close and I wish that it were still you I was on my way home to.
Please delete my number – because I didn’t want to end up here. Because the word “Maybe” is the slowest form of torture that you possibly could have settled on, dragging out a hope that died long ago despite your stark refusal to bury it. Because maybe doesn’t mean, “This may happen.”
It means, “I am too fearful to go but not strong enough to stay.”
It means, “I’ll miss you but not enough to be with you.”
It means, “I love you but not quite enough to stick around and fight.”
Please delete my number – because I don’t want to delete you. Because I want you with a certainty that you will perhaps never possess. Because I do not have to think twice about whether I would like to answer your text messages or pick up your phone calls. Because I’m sure. Because I do not love people halfway and that’s where you and I differ. I don’t want the occasional phone call. I don’t want to play your tired-out game.
Please delete my number because I’m not going to settle for your maybes. I want concrete. I want definite. I want people who call when they say they will and show up when they plan to. I don’t want to spend my life waiting for and wasted on a person who can only love halfway. I do not want your texts, late at night that say,
“I miss you” or
“I’m sorry” or
“I just need a little bit more time.”
Please delete my number – because I’m deleting yours. And you can find someone new to text your maybes to.
March 15, 2017
Absolutely adored this book... literally felt like the author wrote this for me and was speaking to my heart. Thank you for such an amazing book. <3
January 3, 2018
This is definitely a book is see myself coming back to and re-reading. I loved the essay style and I think everyone should read this.
January 22, 2020
This is me wanting my money back.
October 12, 2018
"It is hard to get over a cheater because when you leave the relationship, there're two people you must mourn:
- One is the asshole who cheated on you, in all their flawed, unfaithful glory
- The other person you must get over is the person you thought they were."
"To love without expectation, you show compassion. You remember the times when you’ve lied and cheated and fell short of the expectations other people set for you, and you forgive yourself for them."
"So this is me unclasping my fingers.
This is my parting, my reluctance, my heartache and my final gift to you.
This is me letting you go."
This book taught me how to let go a broken relationship, how to let go a person that I still love so much, how to get over an asshole that cheated on me.
This book is a blessing for my unforgiving-heart.
Finally, for someone that I love so much. I forgive you and myself.
I let you go.
September 18, 2017
I don't talk about book recommendations here very much.. but I've read this recently. This book is not "deep" nor is it going to tell you things you don't already know. It isn't at all what I expected. It's perfect for the broken hearted, the newly broken-up, the world-weary, the lonely. Helps move you through the wide range of emotions while dealing with heartbreak of any kind.
It's written in such that you view the index and turn to the page you need on that day such as, "Read this if no one texted you good morning." or "Why it's so hard to get over a cheater." I probably wouldn't normally pick this book up myself, but it was gifted by a very loving friend. It moved me. It resonated with me. I am positive it will with you too. 5 star.
It's written in such that you view the index and turn to the page you need on that day such as, "Read this if no one texted you good morning." or "Why it's so hard to get over a cheater." I probably wouldn't normally pick this book up myself, but it was gifted by a very loving friend. It moved me. It resonated with me. I am positive it will with you too. 5 star.
December 2, 2018
It wasn’t quite what I was expecting. I *think* I thought it would delve deeper into why we harbour feelings or something? And I just found it quite surface level and a bit airy fairy. (And in some places dare i say, quite preachy). Some chapters resonated more-so than others - and the titles of each chapter were indicative of what the subject matter would be, so it made it easier to skip less relevant points. Not something I’d reach for again, I’m afraid.
April 28, 2020
I just love it , i cried at some chapters and felt so much hope at some ..this books is a real inspiration
To let go and move on cause there‘s so much out there you‘re happy moments aren‘t in the past they‘re in the future possibly with someone new
Be who you are if you‘re the type of person who‘s got fire in their hearts do not tame that fire inside of you for anybody if you choose to not play games and please don‘t , stick to that cause we need more people like you who live and love fearlessly who will give their all we need more brave people out there
Its okay to love and care deeply , its okay to be the one who cares more , you are just gifted with a gentle heart i know its hard to break that heart of yours but please don‘t stop being who you are a person with a gentle heart
There‘s no ”the perfect one” there‘s the right one for YOU and that one will love your darkness who‘ll go through your fears and pain as if they are reading a book they will know every side of you and yet fall and love the dark side of you and that one will never walk away that one will know your shadows yet hold your hand
There‘s moments when we will meet someone new and we will wonder if the end of your story with them will be the same and there‘s gonne be so many questions in your head like ”are they ready to go through this? ””will i end up with broken-heart again?” but the right question is ”am i ready to risk again there‘s no Guarantees that we won‘t feel the pain or that person will leave in the end or stay but are we willing to risk again?” We meet people for a reason and some of them won‘t be with us forever though sometimes we hope that the circle will end and we found our forever person but what is life without risks ,like we go to school hoping to succeed yet there a chance of us failing yet we take our chances and try same things with love we take risks everytime we choose to start all over again and sometimes the people we meet gonna have to leave in the end but maybe they‘re what we need now , maybe they will bring side in us that we‘ve never knew about or teach us new things so take the risk cause you never know
And for those who you once we loved let them go feel happy that you once had them but let go because true love means letting go and sometimes thats the perfect ending of the story just hope that no matter what path they choose without you ,hope that they end up happy and its fine remember that you still have there‘s a future for you with someone else who can love you more and correctly and
There‘s no perfect time there‘s our choice to take the leap of faith and go ahead and try
To let go and move on cause there‘s so much out there you‘re happy moments aren‘t in the past they‘re in the future possibly with someone new
Be who you are if you‘re the type of person who‘s got fire in their hearts do not tame that fire inside of you for anybody if you choose to not play games and please don‘t , stick to that cause we need more people like you who live and love fearlessly who will give their all we need more brave people out there
Its okay to love and care deeply , its okay to be the one who cares more , you are just gifted with a gentle heart i know its hard to break that heart of yours but please don‘t stop being who you are a person with a gentle heart
There‘s no ”the perfect one” there‘s the right one for YOU and that one will love your darkness who‘ll go through your fears and pain as if they are reading a book they will know every side of you and yet fall and love the dark side of you and that one will never walk away that one will know your shadows yet hold your hand
There‘s moments when we will meet someone new and we will wonder if the end of your story with them will be the same and there‘s gonne be so many questions in your head like ”are they ready to go through this? ””will i end up with broken-heart again?” but the right question is ”am i ready to risk again there‘s no Guarantees that we won‘t feel the pain or that person will leave in the end or stay but are we willing to risk again?” We meet people for a reason and some of them won‘t be with us forever though sometimes we hope that the circle will end and we found our forever person but what is life without risks ,like we go to school hoping to succeed yet there a chance of us failing yet we take our chances and try same things with love we take risks everytime we choose to start all over again and sometimes the people we meet gonna have to leave in the end but maybe they‘re what we need now , maybe they will bring side in us that we‘ve never knew about or teach us new things so take the risk cause you never know
And for those who you once we loved let them go feel happy that you once had them but let go because true love means letting go and sometimes thats the perfect ending of the story just hope that no matter what path they choose without you ,hope that they end up happy and its fine remember that you still have there‘s a future for you with someone else who can love you more and correctly and
There‘s no perfect time there‘s our choice to take the leap of faith and go ahead and try
June 6, 2018
We all love the Theory of Multiple Universes
We love the theory of multiple universes because it allows us to believe that all the people we didn’t become, all the roads we didn’t take, all the times we turned left when we should’ve turned right, didn’t wither and die a senseless death. We like to believe that somewhere out there, there’s a Universe where we get to have made the other choice. The one that might have changed us. Grown us. Made us into bigger, braver people that the ones who we became instead.
These other, hypothetical universes allow us so many leniencies. They are where we can go to unload our hearts and our failures and regrets. In some Universe, these choices are not mine. In some lifetime, I did it all better.
I used to believe that there were so many Universes for you and I.
There was the one where there was nothing to forgive — where we grew up as slowly as we needed to, never had to turn against each other, didn’t have grater ambitions or wanderings eyes, or weary, mismatched hopes clasped too tightly to our chests. One where everything happened the way it was supposed to. The one where we wanted the same things.
I have driven myself mad over the years, mapping out all of these Universes for you and I. If-only this. What-if-I’d that. Tracing and trailing through our history, there are so many moments where our galaxies split in half. Where our stars realigned and our planets shifted swiftly and we found ourselves on wildly different courses than the ones we should have taken.
But we don’t live in any of those Universes.
We live in this one, the one where we lost each other.
And this has been the hardest Universe to swallow.
Out of all of all possible Universes, we landed in the one that broke us. The one where two halves did not make a whole and every molehill turned into a mountain. This is the Universe where in ten hundred thousand tiny ways, we were wrong for each other. It’s the one where we’re always going to be.
I think that so many lovers get those alternate Universes, where they are happier and freer and more fulfilled by each other’s side. But I like to think we don’t get one. I like to think that no matter which roads we’d taken, which decisions we’d made, which errors of judgment we’d reversed, there isn’t a Universe out there that could possibly have saved us.
I want us to be that single glitch in the matrix. I want it to all be far out of our control.
Because the thing about loving you is that I’d have waded through an infinite number of Universes trying to find the one that’s right for us. The one that would have suited us, strengthened us, let us be the partners we needed to be for each other.
But there are too many galaxies out there. There are too many fractures, too many splinters, too many moments where the roads diverged and the manifestations of our choices split into ten thousand alternate lives. There are enough what-ifs out there for me to get lost in forever, and I don’t want to spend my time chasing our cosmos anymore.
I’m ready to come back to this Universe.
I’m ready to accept that there may not be another Universe out there for us. And maybe that’s okay.
There’s still Universe enough here for me.
And maybe this is the Universe where I learn to not need you anymore.
We love the theory of multiple universes because it allows us to believe that all the people we didn’t become, all the roads we didn’t take, all the times we turned left when we should’ve turned right, didn’t wither and die a senseless death. We like to believe that somewhere out there, there’s a Universe where we get to have made the other choice. The one that might have changed us. Grown us. Made us into bigger, braver people that the ones who we became instead.
These other, hypothetical universes allow us so many leniencies. They are where we can go to unload our hearts and our failures and regrets. In some Universe, these choices are not mine. In some lifetime, I did it all better.
I used to believe that there were so many Universes for you and I.
There was the one where there was nothing to forgive — where we grew up as slowly as we needed to, never had to turn against each other, didn’t have grater ambitions or wanderings eyes, or weary, mismatched hopes clasped too tightly to our chests. One where everything happened the way it was supposed to. The one where we wanted the same things.
I have driven myself mad over the years, mapping out all of these Universes for you and I. If-only this. What-if-I’d that. Tracing and trailing through our history, there are so many moments where our galaxies split in half. Where our stars realigned and our planets shifted swiftly and we found ourselves on wildly different courses than the ones we should have taken.
But we don’t live in any of those Universes.
We live in this one, the one where we lost each other.
And this has been the hardest Universe to swallow.
Out of all of all possible Universes, we landed in the one that broke us. The one where two halves did not make a whole and every molehill turned into a mountain. This is the Universe where in ten hundred thousand tiny ways, we were wrong for each other. It’s the one where we’re always going to be.
I think that so many lovers get those alternate Universes, where they are happier and freer and more fulfilled by each other’s side. But I like to think we don’t get one. I like to think that no matter which roads we’d taken, which decisions we’d made, which errors of judgment we’d reversed, there isn’t a Universe out there that could possibly have saved us.
I want us to be that single glitch in the matrix. I want it to all be far out of our control.
Because the thing about loving you is that I’d have waded through an infinite number of Universes trying to find the one that’s right for us. The one that would have suited us, strengthened us, let us be the partners we needed to be for each other.
But there are too many galaxies out there. There are too many fractures, too many splinters, too many moments where the roads diverged and the manifestations of our choices split into ten thousand alternate lives. There are enough what-ifs out there for me to get lost in forever, and I don’t want to spend my time chasing our cosmos anymore.
I’m ready to come back to this Universe.
I’m ready to accept that there may not be another Universe out there for us. And maybe that’s okay.
There’s still Universe enough here for me.
And maybe this is the Universe where I learn to not need you anymore.
August 6, 2019
Of course it’s a five star ❤️
I did reaaaally like this book. It was full of beauty, romance, true feelings, and The Truth of heartbroken people.
This book embodied the reality of breakups. The reality we’ve been always hiding.
Heidi knew how to put the right words next to each other. This book was really captivating. And i felt too much sadness when Heidi talked about things that concern me ..
anyway, i really enjoyed it and i naturally recommand it to any reader who’d like to have a little smile upon his/her lips while reading this beauty 😍❤️
I did reaaaally like this book. It was full of beauty, romance, true feelings, and The Truth of heartbroken people.
This book embodied the reality of breakups. The reality we’ve been always hiding.
Heidi knew how to put the right words next to each other. This book was really captivating. And i felt too much sadness when Heidi talked about things that concern me ..
anyway, i really enjoyed it and i naturally recommand it to any reader who’d like to have a little smile upon his/her lips while reading this beauty 😍❤️
January 3, 2021
This is me not going to take recommendations from the person who suggested this, ever again.
August 16, 2022
Cloying waste of time. As the chapters wear on, Priebe transitions from (unconvincingly) asserting that she’s over her cheating ex to designing a new imaginary boyfriend— she even goes so far as to write wedding vows for her fake fiancé. This book is a deeply pathetic personal narrative from which the author attempts to draw universal truths and lessons, but ultimately, the only thing Priebe succeeds at is giving the reader a clear understanding of why she was dumped in the first place.
Thank you to Julie for sending me a tiktok about this xoxo
Thank you to Julie for sending me a tiktok about this xoxo
September 30, 2022
The current mercury retrograde had me picking this book up again. Reading this essay collection felt more poignant than ever and helped me process some complex feelings from the past.
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I read this at the exact time I needed to. Every essay spoke direct to my soul, and I can honestly say I've never read anything like this. Its a beautiful comfort if you're nursing hurts that you have forgotten about, or are new. Its life affirming, raw, and full of hope. I love this book so much and can see myself re-reading it again and again. Its just brilliant. I'm so happy and grateful this exists.
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I read this at the exact time I needed to. Every essay spoke direct to my soul, and I can honestly say I've never read anything like this. Its a beautiful comfort if you're nursing hurts that you have forgotten about, or are new. Its life affirming, raw, and full of hope. I love this book so much and can see myself re-reading it again and again. Its just brilliant. I'm so happy and grateful this exists.
August 14, 2017
This was a lifesaver after my breakup. It put so many things into perspective for me. It's ok to feel the hurt and things will get better.
December 21, 2018
an amazing book. please take the time to read this. though you may already know some of the statements the author makes - it's always good to be affirmed of your worth and this book does just that.
October 20, 2023
insufferable and incredibly elementary. would probably only recommend if you are 17 and just got dumped for the first time
July 1, 2022
I feel like if I went through most of the things that are talked about in this book I would definitely rate it higher but unfortunately I have not. Still such a good time.
April 22, 2020
The people we meet at the wrong time are actually just the wrong people.
A self-help book that talked about
heartbreak, failed relationship, moving forward and letting go.
If we didn’t have to search for the love of our lives, we would finally be free to realize that we are allowed to be the loves of our own.
They don’t tell you that nobody can tell you the way love is going to feel for you. That it’s an experience so unique to all of us that we’ll never fully understand what we’re getting ourselves into until we find ourselves right in the middle of it.
It doesn't share a too complex method -- just words that let you feel like there's someone talking to you and tell you things that you couldn't see clearly while the break up still clouding most of your vision.
I think if you're recently just going through a breakup, this book will definitely help to soothe the unsettled feeling of blaming yourself, thinking of what could have and should have been done.
January 11, 2017
Stunning
Stunning words that take you through life, love, love lost, new love, heart ache, and happiness of a true romantic.
Stunning words that take you through life, love, love lost, new love, heart ache, and happiness of a true romantic.
August 26, 2019
The cringe
May 6, 2020
Wow, IF you want to make yourself feel even WORSE after a breakup then go right ahead and indulge.
April 19, 2021
"you need to be alone when you're unhappy with yourself"
pensé que me iba a volar la cabeza pero no.
pensé que me iba a volar la cabeza pero no.
December 13, 2022
#بديهيات
بعتذر للشجرة اللي اتقطعت عشان يتعمل منها ورق لطباعة مثل هذا العك
بعتذر للشجرة اللي اتقطعت عشان يتعمل منها ورق لطباعة مثل هذا العك
October 18, 2024
"To love someone long-term is to attend a thousand funerals of the people they used to be. The people they’re too exhausted to be any longer. The people they don’t recognise inside themselves anymore. The people they grew out of, the people they never ended up growing into. We so badly want the people we love to get their spark back when it burns out; to become speedily found when they are lost.
But it is not our job to hold anyone accountable to the people they used to be. It is our job to travel with them between each version and to honour what emerges along the way. Sometimes it will be an even more luminescent flame. Sometimes it will be a flicker that disappears and temporarily floods the room with a perfect and necessary darkness."
Det var dette sitatet som gjorde at jeg fattet interesse for boka, da det er interessant med et annet perspektiv på etablerte sannheter. Så for meg at boka utforsket mellommenneskelige relasjoner generelt, ikke bare i forhold. Litt dårlig research fra min side, da hun allerede i forordet kan bekrefte at boken ble skrevet med et knust hjerte fra et forhold som akkurat hadde gått dunken. Okay, så det er en sånn bok.
I korte trekk handler boken om å klare å gi slipp på de personene vi er mest glad i, selv om man kanskje ikke er klar for det. I tillegg handler den om å omfavne veien videre i etterkant.
Det negative (for meg):
- Dette er i utgangspunktet en bok for personer som ikke har funnet closure etter sitt siste forhold/tapet av noen de har vært glad i, så den gjør seg aller best for personer som er i den situasjonen.
- Underveis i boken adresserer hun leseren som "to all the women that...", noe som gjør at man føler seg litt på bortebane som mannlig leser.
- Noen av kapitlene starter med "Read this if you [X]", noe som impliserer at man kan hoppe over kapittelet hvis man ikke kjenner på det hun beskriver. Et slags selvhjelps-oppslagsverk. Ikke helt min prefererte leseropplevelse.
Det positive:
- Gode betraktninger rundt relasjoner som får deg til å reflektere. "You never meet the right people at the wrong time because the right people are timeless".
- I utgangspunktet en solid bok som sier veldig mye fornuftig om hvordan man gir slipp på et menneske og det å ta ansvar for å ha det så bra som mulig i etterkant.
But it is not our job to hold anyone accountable to the people they used to be. It is our job to travel with them between each version and to honour what emerges along the way. Sometimes it will be an even more luminescent flame. Sometimes it will be a flicker that disappears and temporarily floods the room with a perfect and necessary darkness."
Det var dette sitatet som gjorde at jeg fattet interesse for boka, da det er interessant med et annet perspektiv på etablerte sannheter. Så for meg at boka utforsket mellommenneskelige relasjoner generelt, ikke bare i forhold. Litt dårlig research fra min side, da hun allerede i forordet kan bekrefte at boken ble skrevet med et knust hjerte fra et forhold som akkurat hadde gått dunken. Okay, så det er en sånn bok.
I korte trekk handler boken om å klare å gi slipp på de personene vi er mest glad i, selv om man kanskje ikke er klar for det. I tillegg handler den om å omfavne veien videre i etterkant.
Det negative (for meg):
- Dette er i utgangspunktet en bok for personer som ikke har funnet closure etter sitt siste forhold/tapet av noen de har vært glad i, så den gjør seg aller best for personer som er i den situasjonen.
- Underveis i boken adresserer hun leseren som "to all the women that...", noe som gjør at man føler seg litt på bortebane som mannlig leser.
- Noen av kapitlene starter med "Read this if you [X]", noe som impliserer at man kan hoppe over kapittelet hvis man ikke kjenner på det hun beskriver. Et slags selvhjelps-oppslagsverk. Ikke helt min prefererte leseropplevelse.
Det positive:
- Gode betraktninger rundt relasjoner som får deg til å reflektere. "You never meet the right people at the wrong time because the right people are timeless".
- I utgangspunktet en solid bok som sier veldig mye fornuftig om hvordan man gir slipp på et menneske og det å ta ansvar for å ha det så bra som mulig i etterkant.
November 13, 2017
I ABSOLUTELY LOOVVVVEEDD THIS BOOK !!! Maybe it's because this year involved heartbreak over losing my grandmother and losing a relationship with a boy I felt myself falling for. This book was incredible and I loved how it was written. Very poetic, engaging and real.
A MASSIVE review to come soon to my channel for those of you who have and haven't read this book. Watch this space for more >> https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBAM...
For now, I hope you are enjoying your day and are indulging yourself in the addiction that is books. Devour. Devour. Devour.
Sidney xx
A MASSIVE review to come soon to my channel for those of you who have and haven't read this book. Watch this space for more >> https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBAM...
For now, I hope you are enjoying your day and are indulging yourself in the addiction that is books. Devour. Devour. Devour.
Sidney xx
February 5, 2017
This was an amazing book. Heartbreaking at times, uplifting at others it certainly helps you to see things clearly and re-focus your life. I recommend it to everyone going through a break up or if they just want to learn more about love and relationships. I will be re-reading it as one time is not enough.
February 7, 2017
wow.
It's such a great book. Got me hooked from the beginning. One of those books that deserves to be read over and over again
It's such a great book. Got me hooked from the beginning. One of those books that deserves to be read over and over again
May 1, 2018
This is so beautiful and I adored everything about this book. I can relate everything to me. Everyone should read this.
August 25, 2022
Horrible and cringy, no depth to it
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