Does This Beach Make Me Look Fat?: True Stories and Confessions

The Amazing Adventures of an Ordinary Woman #6

by Lisa Scottoline, Francesca Serritella

The unstoppable, irreverent mother-daughter team presents a new collection of funny stories and true confessions that every woman can relate to. From identity theft to the hazards of bicycling to college reunions and eating on the beach, Lisa and Francesca tackle the quirks, absurdities, and wonders of everyday life with wit and warmth. As Lisa says, "More and more, especially in the summertime when I'm sitting on the beach, I'm learning not to sweat it. To go back to the child that I used to be. To see myself through the loving eyes of my parents. To eat on the beach. And not to worry about whether every little thing makes me look fat. In fact, not to worry at all."


So put aside your worries and join Lisa and Francesca as they navigate their way through the crazy world we live in, laughing along the way.

Genres: Humor, Nonfiction, Memoir, Essays, Chick Lit, Audiobook, Short Stories

290 pages, Hardcover

First published July 7, 2015

About the author

Lisa Scottoline is a #1 bestselling and Edgar award-winning author of 33 novels. Her books are book-club favorites, and Lisa and her daughter Francesca Serritella have hosted an annual Big Book Club Party for over a thousand readers at her Pennsylvania farm, for the past twelve years. Lisa has served as President of Mystery Writers of America, and her reviews of fiction and non-fiction have appeared in The New York Times, The Washington Post and The Philadelphia Inquirer. She also writes a weekly column with her daughter for the Philadelphia Inquirer entitled Chick Wit, a witty take on life from a woman’s perspective, which have been collected in a bestselling series of humorous memoirs. Lisa graduated magna cum laude in three years from the University of Pennsylvania, with a B.A. in English, and cum laude from the University of Pennsylvania Law School, where she taught Justice and Fiction. Lisa has over 30 million copies of her books in print and is published in over 35 countries. She lives in the Philadelphia area with an array of disobedient pets and wouldn’t have it any other way.

Reviews

[Carole (Carole's Random Life) · Rating 4 out of 5]

This review can also be found at Carole's Random Life.

I am absolutely amazed by how closely I can relate to these authors. This collection of humorous essays made me chuckle often and tear up occasionally. I have read quite a few of Lisa Scottoline's books and have even stood in line to have her sign my book exactly twice. Both of these authors have a phenomenal sense of humor.

If you are looking for a book with a plot, this isn't that kind of book. This a collection of very short stories that share a few observations and give you just a peek into their world. This is the perfect book to read just a bit at a time. Each story takes just a few minutes and can put a smile on your face almost instantly. I actually think that this would be the perfect book to load on a smart phone and read anytime you find yourself waiting somewhere.

I could relate to both author's writing almost equally. I have been out of the dating scene for a while and although I may sometimes think fondly of that time, this book reminded me that it really wasn't all that much fun. When they talked about Mother Mary's hospice care, I couldn't help but tear up but not because the story was told in a depressing manner. They both talked about that time in such an honest and realistic manner that it brought back a lot of memories and I like to remember so that's a good thing.

Most of the book is a light and fun. I would bet that most women will find something to relate to in this book because they hit on a wide range of subjects. This book talks about friends, diets, movies, dogs, cats, Bradley Cooper, boyfriends, fitbits, subways, ponies, and a whole list of other topics. There were even a few pictures that helped bring the story to life. I love pictures. There were sections of the book that I read aloud to my husband - not because he cares about what I am reading but I just loved what was being said so much that I felt like I had to share it with someone and he was available.

I would highly recommend this book to others. I have read a lot of Lisa Scottoline's work but only one other humorous novel which I also enjoyed. I plan to work my way through the rest of these books soon and hope that there are a lot more to come in the future.

I received an advance reader edition of this book from St. Martin's Press via NetGalley for the purpose of providing an honest review.

[Madison Warner Fairbanks · Rating 5 out of 5]

Does This Beach Makes Me Look Fat? by Lisa and Francesca Scottoline

A fun and mostly humorous series of essays from both Lisa and her daughter, Francesca Scottoline. Some of the pieces are more poignant with family issues. In fact, I was crying at a few points because their memories of Mother Mary brought out my memories in a similar situation. Very touching.

Mostly the pieces from Lisa were cute and a bit silly discussing her home, dogs, friends and life getting older. Francesca's stories were from a younger point of view (obviously) living life in the big city, meeting friends, staying healthy and humorous points of the city and gym.
The pair look at life very similarly.
It's a feel good book. Humor and life.

I listened to the audible version, but have copies of the book as well. The best part of audible pieces were that they were done by Lisa and Francesca themselves. They talked a bit fast, but it gave real perspective knowing it was their writing, story and life.

The best line and philosophy from Lisa "why is the answer always 'working out/exercise'? Why isn't the answer 'Chocolate cake'?"

I look forward to more essays and stories from this mother and daughter duo.

[Yodamom]

I was on the fence about finishing this. It started out hilarious, which is what I was looking for and has since gone into, serious issues, sad ones. I spent my reading time picking up any book on my shelf rather than resume with this one. It was time to just put it back int eh book bag and return it to the library. It's not bad but I'm not interested anymore.

[Sherwood Smith]

Copy received from NetGalley.

This collection of blog riffs, anecdotes, and mini-essays was put together by the mother and daughter duo, Lisa Scottoline & Francesca Serritelli. It ranges over the entire spectrum of life, specifically female life, from the tribulations of dating for twenty-somethings to menopausal issues, including care for, and losing, a beloved matriarch.

Most of the riffs are mildly humorous (and some of them try a little too hard to be funny) but the ones I responded to the strongest were the glimpses of their lives, written simply yet conveying a compassionate view of the quirks and quandaries of life, and especially of other people. Even the one about identity theft--when one of them discovered that a group of women con artists had stolen her social security number, real name, and address to open a host of credit cards before going on a spending spree--was not angrily bitter.

Best of all was the short riff called “Love Without Rough Edges,” a beautifully poignant visit carried by gently evocative details. But there is such a range here that readers are sure to respond to some aspect of their adventures, whether it's being discovered by workmen staring through the window while one is relaxing at home without a bra to pets, dieting, food, friendship, and the warp and weft of everyday life.

There is no plot. Halfway through reading this I thought, this is the perfect summer gift for people who say they don't read. The book can be dipped into on any page, the essays take at most ten minutes to read, usually less, and most of them leave one with a sense of the authors' generous view of the world, and their determination to live lives of good will.

[Linda · Rating 5 out of 5]

OMG! Why haven’t I ever read Lisa Scottoline & Francesca Serritella before?
Does This Beach Make Me Look Fat? is book that is co-authored by a woman in her 50’s and her 20 something daughter. They are both very funny, causing me to have more than a few laugh-out-loud moments. The concept of having the dual generational opinions on life is refreshing. It’s really interesting hearing their different views on such things as pets, food, dating, and exercise.
This generation gap expresses a unique and humorous comparison and contrast on so many parts of our daily lives. And they don’t sugar coat it! I like that dogs have first world problems; that a dog’s parents’ annoyance with the remote can cause the dogs to not get their beauty sleep. And that when it comes to Identity theft, it’s important to make more exciting purchases, and to look good while you’re doing it.

Also they live in my part of the world and I love the seeing the local culture references in the stories.

[Anne · Rating 1 out of 5]

Well I'm obviously in the minority here, but I found this book beyond boring! I only got through a fraction of the little stories but they were not very funny or interesting. It was like reading someone's diary about their ordinary daily activities. I'm really surprised by all the great reviews, but to each his own.

[Debbie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I've been reading Lisa Scottoline for years, but this is the first one I've read that she has written with her daughter. This book was frigging hilarious and I could so relate to so many things. Especially Lisa's stories as we are about the same age.

There is no topic in here that is off limits. And after hearing some of Francesca's dating stories I'm glad I'm done with all that.

I agree with with Lisa, I might be dead below the waist and probably need a hammer and chisel, but at least I can watch TV. Ha!

This would be an excellent beach read and for people who aren't into long drawn out books, the longest story is maybe 10 pages. So you can read for a while, come back and never have to think "what was going on?".

Thanks St. Martin's Press and Net Galley for providing me with this free e-galley in exchange for an honest review. I was thoroughly entertained.

[Margaret · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fabulous fun, laugh out loud, read.

Lisa and her daughter Francesca both have a sharp eye for the humour of a situation; the situation mostly being the state of being a woman today.

Must read for any woman with a sense of humour, and any man too.

[Karen R · Rating 5 out of 5]

Does This Beach Make Me Look Fat – great title that made me chuckle, but could it live up to its name? This collection of stories was every bit as clever and witty as I had hoped. It is a mother-daughter satirical memoir, points of view alternating between famed mystery writer Lisa Scottoline’s (sounds like ‘fettuccine” – did you know that? I didn’t!) and her 28-year old daughter Francesca. I must have been living under a rock as I had no idea that one of my favorite mystery writers had co-written other works with Francesca such as “Meet Me At Emotional Baggage Claim”, “Have a Nice Guilt Trip”, and “Why My Third Husband Will be a Dog”.

Reading this book brought me back to the joy of reading Erma Bombeck columns and books in the late 70's. I often found myself nodding my head, thinking, “hey I’ve been there!” or “I relate to that!” So many funny stories about the small things in life had me laughing out loud. Some bittersweet moments as well, especially the death of their beloved mother/grandmother that brought tears to my eyes.

The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. Francesca is a fresh and first-rate writer. Each of these smart ladies has a storytelling gift and together are a force to be reckoned with.

[Mo · Rating 3 out of 5]

I can relate to Lisa Scottoline. We are about the same age, have shared many of the same things in life, and see the world with similar eyes. I frequently laugh out loud when I read her pieces, and think to myself HELL YES!

I cannot relate to Francesca Serritella. I don’t care about her breakup with her boyfriend, her dating woes nor her massive insecurities. All of that is so far behind me that I can barely remember any of it, and I am bored by most of her pieces.

While I applaud Lisa for being an excellent mother and wanting to give her daughter a leg up in the publishing world, I cannot say that I think Francesca adds anything to this book other than fill. Unfortunately, there is just nothing there for me to grab hold of.

NOTE: I actually think that Francesca would be quite successful on her own, and would benefit by getting out of her mother's shadow.

4 stars for Lisa
2 stars for Francesca

[Cristi-Lael · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was sent an ARC of this book to review. I hadn't read any of either authors prior books, unfortunately, and it took me a few stories to get into their dynamic. In the end, I have to say this book was just OK for me. I enjoyed Lisa's stories the most, even laughed out loud at a few. She has a great sharp wit, which I love. Francesca's stories didn't really do it for me, honestly. They weren't bad, but rather just kind of meh,most of them.
With both ladies' stories, though, I found most of them to be too short. I like short story collections, but like them to be more than 2 or 3 pages. I felt a need for more meat, I guess.

[Gloria A · Rating 1 out of 5]

Obviously, I was to have read a previous memoir book written by this mother-daughter team, because they assumed I knew how marvelous the grandmother was, and she dies in this memoir series--such fun! The chapters alternate between mother (50-ish) and daughter and include reflections on such important things as bicycle riding and shaving one's legs. That would be fine, if the reflections were funny--which they are not! When it said on p. 188, "By the way, if you don't want to hear about wee-wee, read no further," I didn't!

[Kelli · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received this book from a Goodreads giveaway but opinions are my own.

Not my usual genre or structure but I loved the book. I Laughed out loud several times, it was like spending an afternoon with good girlfriends or reading your favorite blog.

The short chapters/stories/essays could be read out of order but every once and a while something is referenced from an earlier antidote.

I'll definitely be checking out the other books written by this duo!

[Kerry - Readkerryread · Rating 4 out of 5]

I received a copy from the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. This book read like you were a best friend having coffee. The stories were light and fun for the most part. A mother daughter duo and you can see the similarities. The stories were short and not in any particular order.

[Debbie Manning · Rating 5 out of 5]

I won this book from Goodreads, and I'm so glad that I did! I had heard of Lisa Scottoline, but had never read her works. This book is a collection of vignettes written by both Lisa and her daughter. I think I smiled during each chapter, and LOL'd several times. It's a lighthearted beach read. I have to check out more of her books.

[C · Rating 1 out of 5]

I couldn't get through the 1st CD of this audio book. Drama, whining, and low hanging comic fruit. If you find ditsy humor entertaining, cat litter confusing, and remote controls mind boggling, then this is the book for you.

[Eileen W · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really enjoyed this book- mostly lighthearted stories about their lives. While I can relate more to Lisa’s stories, I enjoyed reading about Francesca’s experiences in New York City as well. Overall a fun and uplifting read. Love the title~

[Lorraine · Rating 4 out of 5]

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️Stars. A fun, spirited and lighthearted read.

[Sharyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love these books. I know they are collections of newspaper columns, but I love the dynamic between Mother and daughter, how honest they are about their lives, especially the Mother Mary stories in this book, as my mother also died very quickly after a stage 4 lung cancer was discovered. Love the stories of the pets (I also had a Cavalier). I read Scottoline's novels, and just appreciate how she talks about her life as a writer, how unglamorous it is and how hard she works. Also, it is a good book for bedtime as I don't feel compelled to stay up reading to finish it!!

[Katey · Rating 1 out of 5]

This is supposed to be humor. I read to page 45 and I don't think I laughed once.

These aren't short stories, they're blog posts. I don't see the point, there's no cohesion or thread, and the author flip flops every couple of stories.

Next.

[Carmel · Rating 1 out of 5]

Ok I tried to read this book but it was way too slow and boring for me.

[Cathy · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was so much fun to read and I could relate to it all which is why it had me laughing out loud at nearly every chapter. It’s a quick one-day read, but worth all the fun inside.

[Kelly · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fun read.

[Eileen Carter · Rating 1 out of 5]

So-so

I was excited about reading this book as I thought it would be funny. Yes some stories were a little ha ha funny, but really most of them really were just so-so.

[Laurie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Witty quick short story read, perfect for the beach or pool that doesn't require much thinking.

[Gina Torn · Rating 5 out of 5]

I adore this series of nonfiction stories by this mother-daughter duo! Every chapter is either hilarious or has a life lesson. They’re relatable whether you’re 25 or 65. Some of my favorite chapters are Ms. Scottoline going to Vegas for the first time and seeing slot machines in the airport or Ms. Serritella’s story about about seeing old college friends you wouldn’t mind NOT seeing! I love the stories of their mom and grandmother adoringly called Mother Mary who made spaghetti almost every single night for dinner. Sounds good to me!

I love listening to these short stories on audio because the two authors read it themselves and the way the stories are told makes them even better. You don’t have to read them in order but some of the repeat family members and such make it funnier. This is my 37th (!!!!) book of Ms. Scottoline and I won’t stop until I’ve read them all! I’m sad I’m finished this series because I love them! Highly recommend if you need a good and humorous story!

Favorite line: “Why do doctors always say exercise will make you feel better? Why is the answer never go eat chocolate cake?”

[Rebecca · Rating 3 out of 5]

A clever number of little short stories, more like observations, from Lisa Scottoline and her daughter, Francesca, but I didn't find them to be as funny as I suppose they were meant to be. I think I find myself to not really be in the same boat, or frame of reference, as they are. They're cute people, to be sure, but I guess they're just too "East Coast" for me. That's the only way I can explain it. My book club is currently reading the book and it will be interesting to see what they think. I do have a couple of Boston transplants to Missouri in my group, so they might like it more.

[Brittany · Rating 4 out of 5]

As always, Lisa Scottoline (and now her daughter Francesca) made me laugh out loud. I've seen Lisa multiple times (thank you local libraries and local indie bookstores!) and I could hear her voice in every one of these hilarious stories. My mom always describes these books as funny chicken soup for the soul and I couldn't agree more.

[Alice · Rating 4 out of 5]

I never get tired of these memoir pieces from Lisa Scottoline. Francesca's chapters don't resonate with me quite the same, but as the mother of 4 daughters just younger than Francesca, I enjoy that mother and daughter share this endeavor.

[Grete · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love the humor and moving stories.