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Defined By Deceit
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Life isn't always fair, and that’s something that Llewellyn Gardner knows about first hand. His life was on the fast track until one night of extreme passion changed everything. Now eight years later, he’s still living with the aftershocks of that night. Everywhere he turns or runs, there’s another reminder. What the hell do you do when you try to drown your demons only to find out they can swim?
Shane Smith, Jr. owner of Smith Construction, could see the emotional turmoil within his new employee — it’s why he hired him. There was something about the gorgeous, misunderstood man with the overly expressive eyes that came to their small town with a past no one was willing to overlook. Shane could see the good in Llewellyn, and those eyes of his were a clear window to his soul. Shane wasn't going to let the man live a future of solitude because his past had been plagued with deceit.
Llewellyn wasn’t sure what to think about Shane. After years of protecting himself from being tricked twice, he was now faced with worry again. What would happen to him if Shane didn’t believe his truth, and walked away? Llewellyn wasn’t sure he'd be able to survive being left alone. Again.
Blurb Written by: Crystal Marie of Crystal's Many Reviewers
Life isn't always fair, and that’s something that Llewellyn Gardner knows about first hand. His life was on the fast track until one night of extreme passion changed everything. Now eight years later, he’s still living with the aftershocks of that night. Everywhere he turns or runs, there’s another reminder. What the hell do you do when you try to drown your demons only to find out they can swim?
Shane Smith, Jr. owner of Smith Construction, could see the emotional turmoil within his new employee — it’s why he hired him. There was something about the gorgeous, misunderstood man with the overly expressive eyes that came to their small town with a past no one was willing to overlook. Shane could see the good in Llewellyn, and those eyes of his were a clear window to his soul. Shane wasn't going to let the man live a future of solitude because his past had been plagued with deceit.
Llewellyn wasn’t sure what to think about Shane. After years of protecting himself from being tricked twice, he was now faced with worry again. What would happen to him if Shane didn’t believe his truth, and walked away? Llewellyn wasn’t sure he'd be able to survive being left alone. Again.
Blurb Written by: Crystal Marie of Crystal's Many Reviewers
300 pages, ebook
First published March 23, 2015
311 people are currently reading
2200 people want to read
About the author
A.E. Via
40 books3,199 followersA.E. Via is an author in the beautiful gay romance genre and also founder and owner of Via Star Wings Books. Her writing embodies everything from hopelessly romantic to spicy to scandalous. Her stories often include intriguing edges and twists that take readers to new, thought-provoking depths.
When she's not clicking away at her laptop, she devotes herself to her family--a husband and four children.
Adrienne Via has tons of more stories to tell, but she really would like to hear yours. Via Star Wings Books is currently accepting submissions for established and aspiring LGBTQ authors. I've contracted and successfully published a couple authors - whose information can be found on my website - who can tell you that my passion is giving other writer's stories the love and care it deserves so it could be a gift to another. Visit my site to learn more!
Go to A.E. Via's official website http://authoraevia.com for more detailed information on how to contact her, follow her, or a sneak peak on upcoming work, free reads, VSWB submissions, and where she'll appear next.
When she's not clicking away at her laptop, she devotes herself to her family--a husband and four children.
Adrienne Via has tons of more stories to tell, but she really would like to hear yours. Via Star Wings Books is currently accepting submissions for established and aspiring LGBTQ authors. I've contracted and successfully published a couple authors - whose information can be found on my website - who can tell you that my passion is giving other writer's stories the love and care it deserves so it could be a gift to another. Visit my site to learn more!
Go to A.E. Via's official website http://authoraevia.com for more detailed information on how to contact her, follow her, or a sneak peak on upcoming work, free reads, VSWB submissions, and where she'll appear next.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 593 reviews
January 9, 2016
Re-read December, 2015 Best epilogue ever!
This was a great read that started out breathtakingly sad. There are too many ways to spoiler this one, so my review will be brief.
A shit-ton of hurt and deceit falls on MC Llew when he is a senior in high school. Fast forward 8 years and he is still working on putting his miserable existence of a life back together. During this time he meets a small group of incredibly caring, decent people who help Llew make positive changes in his life, including super-sexy, sweet as honey MC Shane.
After all the hell poor Llew is put through in his short life, I am very happy to report that there were rainbows and puppies and fluffy bunnies everywhere for sweet Llew (and Shane!) in the end!
HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!
This was a great read that started out breathtakingly sad. There are too many ways to spoiler this one, so my review will be brief.
A shit-ton of hurt and deceit falls on MC Llew when he is a senior in high school. Fast forward 8 years and he is still working on putting his miserable existence of a life back together. During this time he meets a small group of incredibly caring, decent people who help Llew make positive changes in his life, including super-sexy, sweet as honey MC Shane.
After all the hell poor Llew is put through in his short life, I am very happy to report that there were rainbows and puppies and fluffy bunnies everywhere for sweet Llew (and Shane!) in the end!
HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!
October 28, 2015
2.8*
editing: 1
plot: 2.5
romance: 3.5
smex: 4+
Defined by Deceit is a scorching hot read with some lovely tender bits. I expect nothing less from Ms. Via.
Keep in mind the MCs don't meet until 37%, but when they do, it's pretty much Insta Lust/Love. And I'm mostly down with that.
One of the MCs spends eight years in jail. We see some of the scenes ON PAGE, and it's brutal.
I didn't fully believe that 18-year-old Llew would have received the sentence he did for
All the characters in this book are either PURE & GOOD or BAD & EVIL. There's no in-between.
Llew, his brother Leslie, Shane, Ms. Pat, Ace, Big Waldo: as GOOD as it gets
Moss and his parents & practically everybody else in both towns: BAD, horrible people
BUT: Llew and Shane are seriously sweet and SEXY together. When Shane stands up for his man, WOWZA, that really worked for me!
Unfortunately, there is egregious use of the Magic Cock:
And finally:
~~EDITING RANT AHEAD~~
Because. Grammar MATTERS.
I have said this in every one of my reviews for Via's books: THIS WOMAN NEEDS TO HIRE A (NEW? BETTER?) EDITOR.
I've read thousands of M/M books, including many freebies, and Via's are BY FAR the most poorly edited books in this genre. Fragments loiter and garden-path sentences run rampant (puns intended), and the woman has never met a comma or semi-colon she could handle.
For example, you need a comma before or after a name when addressing a person:
Commas are fucking important, okay?
Also, a semi-colon is generally used to separate a long, complex list or two related sentences.
It cannot, however, do whatever the fuck it's doing in the sentences quoted below (these are just a few out of the several dozen examples I found):
I feel so strongly about semi-colons, I tattooed one on my body. Now that's dedication, y'all.
(Please attempt to ignore sassy animal-print boots and adorable dog.)
*Rounded up to 3 stars despite my rants because. DIRTY SEX.
I'm a horrible slut; I know. ← (Do you see what I did there?)
editing: 1
plot: 2.5
romance: 3.5
smex: 4+
Defined by Deceit is a scorching hot read with some lovely tender bits. I expect nothing less from Ms. Via.
Keep in mind the MCs don't meet until 37%, but when they do, it's pretty much Insta Lust/Love. And I'm mostly down with that.
One of the MCs spends eight years in jail. We see some of the scenes ON PAGE, and it's brutal.
I didn't fully believe that 18-year-old Llew would have received the sentence he did for
All the characters in this book are either PURE & GOOD or BAD & EVIL. There's no in-between.
Llew, his brother Leslie, Shane, Ms. Pat, Ace, Big Waldo: as GOOD as it gets
Moss and his parents & practically everybody else in both towns: BAD, horrible people
BUT: Llew and Shane are seriously sweet and SEXY together. When Shane stands up for his man, WOWZA, that really worked for me!
Unfortunately, there is egregious use of the Magic Cock:
He wanted this, needed this to make him whole again, to heal him completely ... Gruff and slurred, crooning as Shane fucked him with long, slow strokes. Dicked him good while he sought out his own release. He could hear himself but he couldn't control what left his mouth. That was what good cock did to you.
And finally:
~~EDITING RANT AHEAD~~
Because. Grammar MATTERS.
I have said this in every one of my reviews for Via's books: THIS WOMAN NEEDS TO HIRE A (NEW? BETTER?) EDITOR.
I've read thousands of M/M books, including many freebies, and Via's are BY FAR the most poorly edited books in this genre. Fragments loiter and garden-path sentences run rampant (puns intended), and the woman has never met a comma or semi-colon she could handle.
For example, you need a comma before or after a name when addressing a person:
Commas are fucking important, okay?
Also, a semi-colon is generally used to separate a long, complex list or two related sentences.
It cannot, however, do whatever the fuck it's doing in the sentences quoted below (these are just a few out of the several dozen examples I found):
Shane gripped Llew's elbow; spinning him to face him, a look of complete shock on his face.
Everything old western; rusty tire wheels, ropes, and saddles turned into decorations.
He thought about leaving Shane and Ms. Pat; the only two people who had shown him an ounce of real kindness ...
He and his crew; along with Big Waldo, protected me.
I feel so strongly about semi-colons, I tattooed one on my body. Now that's dedication, y'all.
(Please attempt to ignore sassy animal-print boots and adorable dog.)
*Rounded up to 3 stars despite my rants because. DIRTY SEX.
I'm a horrible slut; I know. ← (Do you see what I did there?)
August 4, 2019
Re-read August 2019
-------------------------
4.5 stars
I loved this. So much hurt/comfort, it was awesome.
The first 20% of this book was really tough. I don't handle injustice well, and there was a lot of that here.
When Llewellyn is 18 he is betrayed in the most awful way imaginable. His 17 year old boyfriend claims Llew raped him when his parents catch them having sex. Moss is afraid to come out to his conservative parents, so he thinks blaming Llew is better.
Llew can't believe Moss would do such a thing. He keeps waiting for Moss to tell the truth, but he never does. So Llew gets sentenced to 10 years in prison.
Life in prison isn't easy, especially for someone as sweet and gentle as Llew. But after several inmates beat him up, Ace saves Llew's life. Ace offers Llew a place in his gang and Llew accepts in the hope that the other inmates will leave him alone.
After 8 years Llew gets out on parole. He doesn't feel like the same man that went in and feels like a man without direction. When he starts working for his brother’s landscaping company Llew is immediately confronted with his past when his brother loses several clients because he hired a ‘sex offender’.
Llew then decides to move to the next town so he’s not taking his brother down with him any longer. His brother is upset, but supports Llew in his decision when it is clear Llew is not changing his mind.
When Llew arrives in Henderson, a place to stay and finding work is his priority. When he helps a nice lady with her groceries, she immediately offers him her garage apartment. Llew is grateful for Ms. Pat and her no-nonsense attitude.
She tells him he should try Smith Construction for a job, so he fills out the necessary application forms.
But when Llew goes to the town meeting that night, his secret comes out. Now everyone knows he went to jail for raping a person. No one cares that he’s innocent.
Llew I sure he won’t get a job now, but Shane Smith Jr. from Smith Construction hires him anyway.
Shane takes one look at the big man with the gentle eyes and knows that man isn’t a rapist. But he sees that Llew has been hurt badly by a lot of people, so convincing him to give Shane a chance might be too much for Llew to handle…
These guys were amazing together. I loved sweet, gentle Llew. And my heart broke for all he had to endure.
Shane was so perfect for him. I also really loved how they had to overcome Llew’s fear of sex. Llew hadn’t had an erection in 8 years. He had been called a child rapist so many times (Moss was 17 and therefore a minor) that he lost all interest in sex. Llew used to be extremely dominant in bed, but now he was scared to let go. Shane was such a patient man, I loved how he told Llew he could handle Llew’s dominant side just fine.
An angsty start, but a sweet second half. This book really delivered the hurt/comfort. It was great.
-------------------------
4.5 stars
I loved this. So much hurt/comfort, it was awesome.
The first 20% of this book was really tough. I don't handle injustice well, and there was a lot of that here.
When Llewellyn is 18 he is betrayed in the most awful way imaginable. His 17 year old boyfriend claims Llew raped him when his parents catch them having sex. Moss is afraid to come out to his conservative parents, so he thinks blaming Llew is better.
Llew can't believe Moss would do such a thing. He keeps waiting for Moss to tell the truth, but he never does. So Llew gets sentenced to 10 years in prison.
Life in prison isn't easy, especially for someone as sweet and gentle as Llew. But after several inmates beat him up, Ace saves Llew's life. Ace offers Llew a place in his gang and Llew accepts in the hope that the other inmates will leave him alone.
After 8 years Llew gets out on parole. He doesn't feel like the same man that went in and feels like a man without direction. When he starts working for his brother’s landscaping company Llew is immediately confronted with his past when his brother loses several clients because he hired a ‘sex offender’.
Llew then decides to move to the next town so he’s not taking his brother down with him any longer. His brother is upset, but supports Llew in his decision when it is clear Llew is not changing his mind.
When Llew arrives in Henderson, a place to stay and finding work is his priority. When he helps a nice lady with her groceries, she immediately offers him her garage apartment. Llew is grateful for Ms. Pat and her no-nonsense attitude.
She tells him he should try Smith Construction for a job, so he fills out the necessary application forms.
But when Llew goes to the town meeting that night, his secret comes out. Now everyone knows he went to jail for raping a person. No one cares that he’s innocent.
Llew I sure he won’t get a job now, but Shane Smith Jr. from Smith Construction hires him anyway.
Shane takes one look at the big man with the gentle eyes and knows that man isn’t a rapist. But he sees that Llew has been hurt badly by a lot of people, so convincing him to give Shane a chance might be too much for Llew to handle…
These guys were amazing together. I loved sweet, gentle Llew. And my heart broke for all he had to endure.
Shane was so perfect for him. I also really loved how they had to overcome Llew’s fear of sex. Llew hadn’t had an erection in 8 years. He had been called a child rapist so many times (Moss was 17 and therefore a minor) that he lost all interest in sex. Llew used to be extremely dominant in bed, but now he was scared to let go. Shane was such a patient man, I loved how he told Llew he could handle Llew’s dominant side just fine.
An angsty start, but a sweet second half. This book really delivered the hurt/comfort. It was great.
January 29, 2023
*4.35* This story completely broke my heart, and slowly put it back together again.
Llewellyn (18) and his boyfriend Moss (17) have been a couple as long as they can remember. Friends in elementary school, then romantic partners in high school. They explored all those first times with one another. Moss enjoys rough sex, really rough. Llewellyn loves him, and enjoys pleasing his boyfriend. They are deep in the closet.
Llewellyn and his older brother live in a tiny trailer on the outside of town. Moss comes from wealth, his father is the town mayor, and a homophobe.
Everything comes crashing down one evening when Moss’ parents come home early from a night out and catch the boys in bed. Moss does the unthinkable. Llewellyn spends the next 8 years surviving that lie.
This is my favorite Via book to date. She emotionally pulverizes her main character in this story, but by that time the reader is so invested there's no going back.
This isn't a soft love story, it takes some hard years to get there, but you'll be cheering the entire time for Llew.
I wish that the story had delved a little bit more into Llew's physical issues. There was an element that felt a little bit like "magic penis" medicine and that felt wrong to do to this story.
A beautiful audiobook voiced by Aiden Snow.
Llewellyn (18) and his boyfriend Moss (17) have been a couple as long as they can remember. Friends in elementary school, then romantic partners in high school. They explored all those first times with one another. Moss enjoys rough sex, really rough. Llewellyn loves him, and enjoys pleasing his boyfriend. They are deep in the closet.
Llewellyn and his older brother live in a tiny trailer on the outside of town. Moss comes from wealth, his father is the town mayor, and a homophobe.
Everything comes crashing down one evening when Moss’ parents come home early from a night out and catch the boys in bed. Moss does the unthinkable. Llewellyn spends the next 8 years surviving that lie.
This is my favorite Via book to date. She emotionally pulverizes her main character in this story, but by that time the reader is so invested there's no going back.
This isn't a soft love story, it takes some hard years to get there, but you'll be cheering the entire time for Llew.
I wish that the story had delved a little bit more into Llew's physical issues. There was an element that felt a little bit like "magic penis" medicine and that felt wrong to do to this story.
A beautiful audiobook voiced by Aiden Snow.
Want to read
March 9, 2015COVERLUST. It's always a good enough reason to add a book, isn't it? I haven't read anything by this author. Yet.
July 9, 2017
I am in awe!
This story had all the perfect ingredients of a dramatic romance.
A beautiful and inherently good guy like Llewellyn Gardner, who - by some evil twists of fate - gets sentenced to 10 years in prison as a sexual offender.
A small town community that doesn't want a 'rapist' in their midst, doing everything to look down on Llew, rendering him an outcast even after he served his time.
And then there's Shane Smith Jr., the boss of a construction company who is willing to look beyond Llew's criminal record and sees the beautiful man underneath the muscled exterior, the imposing body honed by years of training in prison.
Whereas the first half of the story perfectly showed Llew's fall and desperation (making this story an impressive and outstanding read), the second half was pure sugarcoated romance - albeit with GREAT sex scenes.
Things resolved beautifully, if not a bit too smoothly and the HEA was a well-deserved haven for poor misunderstood Llew.
I love stories where characters are dragged through hell, so I had a very soft spot for Llew and his past. I hated how people mistreated him, but let's be honest: If a convicted sex offender is released from prison and wants to settle down in your town, would you welcome him with open arms?
I found the plot very well constructed and believable, but most of all I'm happy that Llew found love and understanding in Shane.
5 stars and a favorite!
This story had all the perfect ingredients of a dramatic romance.
A beautiful and inherently good guy like Llewellyn Gardner, who - by some evil twists of fate - gets sentenced to 10 years in prison as a sexual offender.
A small town community that doesn't want a 'rapist' in their midst, doing everything to look down on Llew, rendering him an outcast even after he served his time.
And then there's Shane Smith Jr., the boss of a construction company who is willing to look beyond Llew's criminal record and sees the beautiful man underneath the muscled exterior, the imposing body honed by years of training in prison.
Whereas the first half of the story perfectly showed Llew's fall and desperation (making this story an impressive and outstanding read), the second half was pure sugarcoated romance - albeit with GREAT sex scenes.
Things resolved beautifully, if not a bit too smoothly and the HEA was a well-deserved haven for poor misunderstood Llew.
I love stories where characters are dragged through hell, so I had a very soft spot for Llew and his past. I hated how people mistreated him, but let's be honest: If a convicted sex offender is released from prison and wants to settle down in your town, would you welcome him with open arms?
I found the plot very well constructed and believable, but most of all I'm happy that Llew found love and understanding in Shane.
5 stars and a favorite!
April 21, 2022
I revisited this story via audio and Aiden Snow's performance, as usual, was sexilious!!! 5++++ Stars
February 6, 2017
***3.5 Stars***
At 18 Llewellyn Gardner thought he had his life mapped out. He was going to go to college and then start his own construction company.
But instead, he ended up in jail, for a crime he did not commit. Eight years later Llewell is out. Needless to say, he wasn’t the same.
My thoughts: Eight years in prison for a crime you have committed is something, at least you know why you’re there. However, eight bloody years in prison for a crime you have NOT committed, well … let me tell you: I can’t even! There is no way to read this and not feel frustrated, wronged, sad and especially angry.
The transformation Llewell’s character suffers was incredible real. He became a quiet person, he couldn’t sleep in a bed for a while and a smile never appeared even though he’d wanted it to. The people in his city made his life miserable. His heart bled with hurt when he realized he would have to leave his brother and move away. He understood unfairness, but it didn’t mean he wasn’t angry; he already lost so much time! But it had to be done, for his brother’s sake and his. I have to say, until here the story blew me away. It was intense and freaking real.
As soon Llewell moves away he meets a very nice lady. We think: phew! Finally Llewell will have a break. Wrong! Bad news spread fast and somehow his bad reputations caught him again. This time though, Llewell has Shane’s support, owner of Smith Construction.
They felt attracted to each other. They got involved. It was hot and fast. Sadly, too fast for me. From there on I felt a bit disappointed with the story. There were too many far fetched moments:
1) Shane’s godmother taking Llewell under her wings immediately.
2) Moss return after so many years
3) Shane’s Dad at the site in the right moment
4) Ace and Jessup incredible unbelievable story.
Don’t take me wrong, I wanted a HEA for him but I would prefer if the author had kept it real.
At 18 Llewellyn Gardner thought he had his life mapped out. He was going to go to college and then start his own construction company.
But instead, he ended up in jail, for a crime he did not commit. Eight years later Llewell is out. Needless to say, he wasn’t the same.
My thoughts: Eight years in prison for a crime you have committed is something, at least you know why you’re there. However, eight bloody years in prison for a crime you have NOT committed, well … let me tell you: I can’t even! There is no way to read this and not feel frustrated, wronged, sad and especially angry.
The transformation Llewell’s character suffers was incredible real. He became a quiet person, he couldn’t sleep in a bed for a while and a smile never appeared even though he’d wanted it to. The people in his city made his life miserable. His heart bled with hurt when he realized he would have to leave his brother and move away. He understood unfairness, but it didn’t mean he wasn’t angry; he already lost so much time! But it had to be done, for his brother’s sake and his. I have to say, until here the story blew me away. It was intense and freaking real.
As soon Llewell moves away he meets a very nice lady. We think: phew! Finally Llewell will have a break. Wrong! Bad news spread fast and somehow his bad reputations caught him again. This time though, Llewell has Shane’s support, owner of Smith Construction.
They felt attracted to each other. They got involved. It was hot and fast. Sadly, too fast for me. From there on I felt a bit disappointed with the story. There were too many far fetched moments:
1) Shane’s godmother taking Llewell under her wings immediately.
2) Moss return after so many years
3) Shane’s Dad at the site in the right moment
4) Ace and Jessup incredible unbelievable story.
Don’t take me wrong, I wanted a HEA for him but I would prefer if the author had kept it real.
April 11, 2015
I think this was A.E. Via's strongest writing to date. She completely crushed me with the first part of this book and I absolutely fell in love with Llew. Watching him try to put his life back together after what was done to him started out very rough, but watching him come back to life with the people who were willing to give him a clean slate, especially Shane, Ms. Pat and the incredibly intriguing Ace was heartwarming.
Lots of angst, hot sex, villains that will have you on the verge of screaming and a roller coaster of emotions in this one which has an ultimately satisfying happy ending.
Lots of angst, hot sex, villains that will have you on the verge of screaming and a roller coaster of emotions in this one which has an ultimately satisfying happy ending.
December 15, 2015
Let me start with W_O_W!!!!! This book blew me away, it literally had me shaking the shit out of my Kindle @ 9%. I was so pissed I had to walk away from this book. Ms. Via goes to a whole new level with this book, it’s the best story telling from her to date IMO.
I’m so thankful that she gave us Llew, he made my heart hurt, he makes me want to be a better person. For him to go through everything that was forced on him in his young life and to face his new life while being “defined by deceit”, and coming out on the other side a better man is truly extraordinary.
It goes to show that anyone faced with adversary can win, even if all the cards are stacked in another’s favor. Llew’s brother Leslie is also an exceptional person, sticking by his brother, whom had lost all hope, keeping his spirits up and just being the loving big brother he needed, was a breath of fresh air. Highly recommend this book to anyone looking for a little angst and to really feel great when you read THE END.
April 20, 2019
4 solid stars
I had this book on my to-read list for many years and I am glad I finally got to it. I didn't expect to love it so much. I love broken characters and angst. The author did a great job in giving us a story full of angst. I can honestly say this story broke my heart.
We get from the blurb that one of the main characters is sentenced to 10 years in prison for something he didn't commit. The most painful thing is he was betrayed by the person he loved most, so his world shattered. After 8 years in prison, he's coming back to his home town, hurting and a shell of the smart man he used to be. And now he has to deal with so much hate.
Most of the book I struggled with the injustice. It was really painful to witness his struggles. When he moves to another town, trying to start fresh, he meets a sweet and kind man who not only wants to help him, but he seems to see his pain and believe his truth.
This story is painful, but well written and the ending is hopeful and unexpectedly sweet.
I had this book on my to-read list for many years and I am glad I finally got to it. I didn't expect to love it so much. I love broken characters and angst. The author did a great job in giving us a story full of angst. I can honestly say this story broke my heart.
We get from the blurb that one of the main characters is sentenced to 10 years in prison for something he didn't commit. The most painful thing is he was betrayed by the person he loved most, so his world shattered. After 8 years in prison, he's coming back to his home town, hurting and a shell of the smart man he used to be. And now he has to deal with so much hate.
Most of the book I struggled with the injustice. It was really painful to witness his struggles. When he moves to another town, trying to start fresh, he meets a sweet and kind man who not only wants to help him, but he seems to see his pain and believe his truth.
This story is painful, but well written and the ending is hopeful and unexpectedly sweet.
June 28, 2022
5***** stars
This is one of the most gut wrenching books I’ve ever read. And at the same time one of the most beautiful love stories. It’s my absolute favorite novel by A.E. Via and probably one of my ALL TIME FAVORITES too.
You get hurt/comfort, a sloooow but hot burn and a kind, quiet giant with deep, telling eyes and a tool-belt riding low on his hips.
-- and Aiden Snow narrating it is the icing on top of it.
******
17yrs old Moss likes rough sex, likes getting marked and bruised by hands and teeth. In that small town they live in he and his 18yrs old boyfriend Llewellen stay deep in the closet. When his homophobic snob of a father and mayor of the town catches them by surprise a panicking Moss claims Llew was raping him.
For that Llew goes to prison, branded a child rapist as Moss was still a minor. The presented evidence overwhelming. A future lost. Llew was an A-grade student with both an athletic and academic scholarship for college. But he would never go to college.
Watching Llew getting betrayed like this and suffering life in prison for a crime he didn’t commit tore my heart to shreds, not to mention the psychological damage all that did to him.
And when he finally gets out, he’s an outcast. It hurts like shit witnessing this injustice.
You just want to step between the pages right in front of Llew and tell them all to fuck off and leave him the fuck alone!!
It’s only then, that Llew decides to move away from his hometown where he will never again get a steady food down and try to start his life anew somewhere no one knows him. That’s when he meets Shane and things change for the better for him. It’s not at all rainbows and sunshine right away because you being a convicted sex offender is public knowledge so it doesn’t stay hidden for long.
But watching Shane believing him, having his back and seeing their heartwarming love story enfold and the beginning of healing made me indescribably happy - watching Llew find a wonderful man and the beautiful love he deserved all along.
And that epilogue!!!! ♡♡♡ …was just everything!
I so recommend to pick it up. It’s so worth reading.
********
side note: Is it crazy that I even felt sorry for Moss at the end? I resent what he did to Llew but somehow I wished there had been a book for him where he escaped the ropes of the life he felt forced to live - that he felt like he had no other option to do what he had.
This is one of the most gut wrenching books I’ve ever read. And at the same time one of the most beautiful love stories. It’s my absolute favorite novel by A.E. Via and probably one of my ALL TIME FAVORITES too.
You get hurt/comfort, a sloooow but hot burn and a kind, quiet giant with deep, telling eyes and a tool-belt riding low on his hips.
-- and Aiden Snow narrating it is the icing on top of it.
******
17yrs old Moss likes rough sex, likes getting marked and bruised by hands and teeth. In that small town they live in he and his 18yrs old boyfriend Llewellen stay deep in the closet. When his homophobic snob of a father and mayor of the town catches them by surprise a panicking Moss claims Llew was raping him.
“Father, help me, please. Help me!” … “Father don’t let him touch me anymore! Help me!”
For that Llew goes to prison, branded a child rapist as Moss was still a minor. The presented evidence overwhelming. A future lost. Llew was an A-grade student with both an athletic and academic scholarship for college. But he would never go to college.
Watching Llew getting betrayed like this and suffering life in prison for a crime he didn’t commit tore my heart to shreds, not to mention the psychological damage all that did to him.
And when he finally gets out, he’s an outcast. It hurts like shit witnessing this injustice.
“Well look at what the dirty, filthy rat dragged out,” … “Why are you over here by the high school, huh? You have no business over here. Feeling nostalgic, Gardner?”
You just want to step between the pages right in front of Llew and tell them all to fuck off and leave him the fuck alone!!
It’s only then, that Llew decides to move away from his hometown where he will never again get a steady food down and try to start his life anew somewhere no one knows him. That’s when he meets Shane and things change for the better for him. It’s not at all rainbows and sunshine right away because you being a convicted sex offender is public knowledge so it doesn’t stay hidden for long.
But watching Shane believing him, having his back and seeing their heartwarming love story enfold and the beginning of healing made me indescribably happy - watching Llew find a wonderful man and the beautiful love he deserved all along.
And that epilogue!!!! ♡♡♡ …was just everything!
I so recommend to pick it up. It’s so worth reading.
********
side note: Is it crazy that I even felt sorry for Moss at the end? I resent what he did to Llew but somehow I wished there had been a book for him where he escaped the ropes of the life he felt forced to live - that he felt like he had no other option to do what he had.
September 16, 2015
4.5 stars
I love these stories that let me crying my eyeballs out!!
My gawd. It was horrendous what Llew had to go through.. It was soo damn sad, it broke my heart.
Eight years later Llew returns to his hometown but the people in town aren’t so forgiving and before he really hurts his brother’s Leslie business, he leaves to start a new life in a new town.
He finds this lady who is kind to him and lets him rent the place above the garage.
At first it seems these same people can’t seem to get past Llew’s past and Llew has a hard time finding a job. He is rediculed a lot.
All Llew needs are people that will give him a chance to show them who he really is.
Shane is one of those people who sees the real him. Their romance was beautiful and I loved that Shane was the one person who helped Llew find himself again!!
I just loved Llew. I read this one quote of him, of what he said that exactly convinced me of what kind of man he was!!
Amazing to be able to feel and say that about the one person who changed your life forever!!
*Highly recommended*
I love these stories that let me crying my eyeballs out!!
My gawd. It was horrendous what Llew had to go through.. It was soo damn sad, it broke my heart.
Eight years later Llew returns to his hometown but the people in town aren’t so forgiving and before he really hurts his brother’s Leslie business, he leaves to start a new life in a new town.
He finds this lady who is kind to him and lets him rent the place above the garage.
At first it seems these same people can’t seem to get past Llew’s past and Llew has a hard time finding a job. He is rediculed a lot.
All Llew needs are people that will give him a chance to show them who he really is.
Shane is one of those people who sees the real him. Their romance was beautiful and I loved that Shane was the one person who helped Llew find himself again!!
“I have you, Shane Smith Jr. Out of all of the deceit that plagued my life… I still came out on the other side of it with you, baby.”
I just loved Llew. I read this one quote of him, of what he said that exactly convinced me of what kind of man he was!!
“I’m not happy at anyone’s misfortune.”
Amazing to be able to feel and say that about the one person who changed your life forever!!
*Highly recommended*
March 30, 2015
I love the cover, it's seriously drool worthy. But that's about all I loved about this book. Let me tell you what I really think about this book.
SILENCE.
SILENCE.
SILENCE.
SILENCE.
Ok fine, I'm kidding, but I've read this word so much in this book, it stuck with me.
First of all, the blurb doesn't mention prison in any way, shape or form, which is unfortunate really, since a good part of the book is about Llewellyn doing jail time for a crime he didn't commit. I hate prison books!!!! Besides, we got to read about Llew's first year spent in prison in on/off detail, then it's over and he's out. So we missed 7 years, but there's no such thing as Prologue, Present or anything telling we're skipping some years. If I knew it dealt with this, especially the reason he had to go to prison for, I would've never picked this book up.
After Llew moves from his hometown because he's treated badly things start to get eye-roll worthy. His new boss has no hesitation on coming at an employee so strongly, which I found off-putting. Plus calling him "babe" when they know each other for a few days and aren't even together is cheesy (actually lots of things are cheesy between them e.g.).
And also, I could understand that after getting to know Llew better Shane would have believed in his innocence. But to blindly trust someone who's a total stranger.....nope, not working for me.“I know you wouldn’t lie.” Shane turned over, looking him in his eyes. “I trust you.” *grumbles*'stupid, stupid man'.*/grumbles*
The resolution is exactly what I expected it was going to be so no surprise there, pleasant or otherwise. But is Llew removed from the sex-offender's list? Is he compensated for doing prison time for a crime he didn't commit? We get no further information on that, it's just dropped there. And the confrontation between Shane and Moss screamed like MAJOR CAT-FIGHT to me. It was so bad, I started laughing. I'm sorry but I can't say I enjoyed this book, but it does seem I'm one of the few that didn't like it. Can't really recommend it either.
SILENCE.
SILENCE.
SILENCE.
SILENCE.
Ok fine, I'm kidding, but I've read this word so much in this book, it stuck with me.
First of all, the blurb doesn't mention prison in any way, shape or form, which is unfortunate really, since a good part of the book is about Llewellyn doing jail time for a crime he didn't commit. I hate prison books!!!! Besides, we got to read about Llew's first year spent in prison in on/off detail, then it's over and he's out. So we missed 7 years, but there's no such thing as Prologue, Present or anything telling we're skipping some years. If I knew it dealt with this, especially the reason he had to go to prison for, I would've never picked this book up.
After Llew moves from his hometown because he's treated badly things start to get eye-roll worthy. His new boss has no hesitation on coming at an employee so strongly, which I found off-putting. Plus calling him "babe" when they know each other for a few days and aren't even together is cheesy (actually lots of things are cheesy between them e.g.).
And also, I could understand that after getting to know Llew better Shane would have believed in his innocence. But to blindly trust someone who's a total stranger.....nope, not working for me.“I know you wouldn’t lie.” Shane turned over, looking him in his eyes. “I trust you.” *grumbles*'stupid, stupid man'.*/grumbles*
The resolution is exactly what I expected it was going to be so no surprise there, pleasant or otherwise. But is Llew removed from the sex-offender's list? Is he compensated for doing prison time for a crime he didn't commit? We get no further information on that, it's just dropped there. And the confrontation between Shane and Moss screamed like MAJOR CAT-FIGHT to me. It was so bad, I started laughing. I'm sorry but I can't say I enjoyed this book, but it does seem I'm one of the few that didn't like it. Can't really recommend it either.
April 4, 2015
It's been a while since I've came across a solid five stars book! This one definitely got it from me. Amazing read, right amount of angst, hot sex scenes ( and quite exotic I must say... She had few nice tricks there ;)
I loved that the plot wasn't 'formulated' nothing about it felt like "been there read that-hundreds times" even by the simple fact that you don't know who and when Llew will find someone to hold him, and only after half the way things starting to slowly shifting in his life.
Amazing trip that was :))
I loved that the plot wasn't 'formulated' nothing about it felt like "been there read that-hundreds times" even by the simple fact that you don't know who and when Llew will find someone to hold him, and only after half the way things starting to slowly shifting in his life.
Amazing trip that was :))
September 11, 2015
Well...this book was a bit different than the other ones I've read from this author. It was way more emotional. I was feeling so bad for Llew...damn he got dealt some shitty cards.
When he's 18 years old, his life is pretty good. Eventhough he lost his parents, he still has his big brother to take care of him and who loves him very much. He's a great athlete and an amazing student. He's been offered different scholarships for college and he has a boyfriend, who has been his best friend for a very long time. He loves Moss very very much and he believes Moss loves him just as much back. Moss is still 17 and the son of the major. His parents are snobs and very conservative and they don't approve of their son hanging out with Llew. Nobody but Llews brother know that they are boyfriends as well as best friends. They are both still in the closet because Moss doens't want his parents to find out about him being gay.
Llew has high hopes that everything will be better once they are in the same college, where they will be able to have a relationship openly.
One night, while hanging out together at Moss'house, Llew finds out that Moss never has the intention to be with him openly and decides to leave. Moss begs him not to leave yet and at least make their goodbye something memorable.
Llew agrees because...hey 18 year old boy being offered sex by his boyfriend...why the hell not.
Moss likes it a bit rough and Llew is quite the dominant. You can only imagine what happens once Moss' parents come home unexpectatly. I'm sure if you've read some of the reviews here...you already know.
Llew's well planned future ends right than and there and let me tell you how I felt about that ...
Llew had a hard time doing time...especially in the beginning, but he makes a very good friend who helps him and he has a counselor who he can talk to.
After 8 years he's back home with his brother, who wants him to work for him, but the people in town aren't that forgiving and Llew decides it's best to move so his borthers bussiness won't suffer.
He finds himself in a town 1,5 half away and tries to start a new life. He meets a very nice lady, who doesn't judge him right away and a beautiful stranger who offers him a job and much much more.
Shane was awesome !! He was so sweet and understanding and really stood up for Llew. That doens't mean things are easy, but at least he's not batteling alone anymore.
I will say there were some things that were a bit unbelievable. Shit that was resolved way to fast and way to easy. It bothered me a bit, but I got over it. The steamfactor was nice, but it did take some time to built...which was expected with this storyline.
So, it was different, emotional and angsty, but I liked it. 3,5 stars from me.
Now let me tell you how I feel about Moss.....
When he's 18 years old, his life is pretty good. Eventhough he lost his parents, he still has his big brother to take care of him and who loves him very much. He's a great athlete and an amazing student. He's been offered different scholarships for college and he has a boyfriend, who has been his best friend for a very long time. He loves Moss very very much and he believes Moss loves him just as much back. Moss is still 17 and the son of the major. His parents are snobs and very conservative and they don't approve of their son hanging out with Llew. Nobody but Llews brother know that they are boyfriends as well as best friends. They are both still in the closet because Moss doens't want his parents to find out about him being gay.
Llew has high hopes that everything will be better once they are in the same college, where they will be able to have a relationship openly.
One night, while hanging out together at Moss'house, Llew finds out that Moss never has the intention to be with him openly and decides to leave. Moss begs him not to leave yet and at least make their goodbye something memorable.
Llew agrees because...hey 18 year old boy being offered sex by his boyfriend...why the hell not.
Moss likes it a bit rough and Llew is quite the dominant. You can only imagine what happens once Moss' parents come home unexpectatly. I'm sure if you've read some of the reviews here...you already know.
Llew's well planned future ends right than and there and let me tell you how I felt about that ...
Llew had a hard time doing time...especially in the beginning, but he makes a very good friend who helps him and he has a counselor who he can talk to.
After 8 years he's back home with his brother, who wants him to work for him, but the people in town aren't that forgiving and Llew decides it's best to move so his borthers bussiness won't suffer.
He finds himself in a town 1,5 half away and tries to start a new life. He meets a very nice lady, who doesn't judge him right away and a beautiful stranger who offers him a job and much much more.
Shane was awesome !! He was so sweet and understanding and really stood up for Llew. That doens't mean things are easy, but at least he's not batteling alone anymore.
I will say there were some things that were a bit unbelievable. Shit that was resolved way to fast and way to easy. It bothered me a bit, but I got over it. The steamfactor was nice, but it did take some time to built...which was expected with this storyline.
So, it was different, emotional and angsty, but I liked it. 3,5 stars from me.
Now let me tell you how I feel about Moss.....
August 6, 2021
I was surprised just how much I loved this book!!!!
January 2, 2016
This story just about broke my heart!
Llewellyn Gardner is 18 years old with his whole life in front of him: academic and athletic scholarships being offered to some of the best schools, and a boyfriend he loves wholeheartedly. One night of passion ruins everything.
He winds up in another small town, and, by luck, meets the two people who will help change his life for the better. One, Ms. Pat, is a wonderful mother figure, and the other, Shane, becomes the man who helps to remake him whole.
I loved this story. Yes, there are definitely some issues I had with it, in particular: sometimes the scenes didn't flow properly, some editing issues and I thought the ending could have concluded a little more gracefully...but it didn't detract from the way the story made me feel. I felt so much for Llew, and was so sad, mad, and happy on his behalf.
I would definitely recommend this story!
This review has been cross-posted at Reviews by Jessewave.
Llewellyn Gardner is 18 years old with his whole life in front of him: academic and athletic scholarships being offered to some of the best schools, and a boyfriend he loves wholeheartedly. One night of passion ruins everything.
He winds up in another small town, and, by luck, meets the two people who will help change his life for the better. One, Ms. Pat, is a wonderful mother figure, and the other, Shane, becomes the man who helps to remake him whole.
I loved this story. Yes, there are definitely some issues I had with it, in particular: sometimes the scenes didn't flow properly, some editing issues and I thought the ending could have concluded a little more gracefully...but it didn't detract from the way the story made me feel. I felt so much for Llew, and was so sad, mad, and happy on his behalf.
I would definitely recommend this story!
This review has been cross-posted at Reviews by Jessewave.
April 22, 2015
3.5 stars.
This book started absolutely perfect, PERFECT!
It was a page turner from page one, and I immediately liked Liew, the MC.
It was so sad to see his promising young life turn into hell with one horrible lie that changed him forever.
The second part of the book felt like it was written by a complete different author.
It was sweet and fluffy case of insta-love, and some major, years-long problems was being solved in a mater of days, if not hours.
I still enjoyed this book a lot, and I would recommend it to my friends.
This book started absolutely perfect, PERFECT!
It was a page turner from page one, and I immediately liked Liew, the MC.
It was so sad to see his promising young life turn into hell with one horrible lie that changed him forever.
The second part of the book felt like it was written by a complete different author.
It was sweet and fluffy case of insta-love, and some major, years-long problems was being solved in a mater of days, if not hours.
I still enjoyed this book a lot, and I would recommend it to my friends.
March 30, 2015
Review by The Blogger Girls.
Wow, I had a feeling this one was going to be good, and I was not disappointed. I absolutely fell in love with LLew, and Shane wasn’t too shabby either.
Llew is such a sweet guy. He spent 8 years in prison after being accused of rape by his high school (closeted) boyfriend after his parents caught them together. Add to that the fact that he was dominating him and had him tied up at the time, did not help matters any. With his boyfriend, Moss, being 17 at the time, Llew was labeled a child molester. This did not bode well for him in prison, but he managed to get through, barely, with the help of a gang leader, Ace, who took him under his wing.
After his release, and realizing he could no longer work with his brother in their company without hurting business, Llew moves away to make a fresh start. It is a bit of a bumpy road, but luckily, he meets some pretty nice people, one in particular, who takes him in and gives him her apartment over her garage. Llew ends up getting a job at Shane’s construction company, which is where the story really starts to get going.
Shane is such a good guy. He never judged Llew, aside from assuming Llew was not capable of being more than a laborer, never looked up info on his past, etc. The two had an instant connection, and Shane made it a point to get to know Llew.
Llew has a pretty big issue though. Due to the events in high school, his now large, full-grown size, and his dominating personality, he is terrified of being accused again. This has resulted in impotence. Even when he feels a spark with Shane, the problem still persists. That is, until Shane comes up with a solution. Let me tell you, 8 years of no orgasms, along with Llew’s hesitance to show any of his alpha side, really made for some steamy hot scenes. I mean, smoking hot. These two have some major chemistry, and I could have read about them all day.
There are still a few bumps here and there, especially with Moss, but everything works out ok in the end. I loved that we got to see Ace (and his now hubby) again. He was a really nice addition to this story that I wish we had gotten more of. Llew was such a fabulous character, and I felt we really got to know him and his struggles and issues. Shane didn’t get as deep, but he was wonderful as well. This is definitely my favorite of Ms. Via’s stories, as I really didn’t want this to end. I was definitely not ready to let Llew and Shane go and hope we get to see them (and the other guys) again in the future.
December 30, 2016
I loved this book and was hooked from beginning to end. Llew was a talented spirit who was ready to take College by storm and begin an architectural career. While he didn't have much, he had the love of his brother and supported him with their late fathers construction company.
As a young man Llew had a partner he thought he loved but who was firmly in the closet. He loved Llew to dominate him and play roughy. Of course Moss was scared of his family and after being caught in a heavy scene he cried rape and lied.... thus destroying Llews life.
Llew spent 8 years in prison for a crime he didn't commit and almost went under as he was constantly assaulted for being a "sex offender" He was saved by Ace and made it through prison.
As Llew tried to assimilate back into life he struggled with the wrongful terms of his parole and release and found that people were unforgiving and gave him no chance - until he met Ma and Shane. Finally some good through the crap.
I have to say my heart broke for Llew and I couldn't stop reading hoping to see him find justice & peace. For the sheer emotions and Llews heart & persistence in this book I gave it 5 stars. I adored this character, Shane his lover, Ace his savior and Leslie his brother and rock. ❤❤❤
I just wanna fist pump the sky !
As a young man Llew had a partner he thought he loved but who was firmly in the closet. He loved Llew to dominate him and play roughy. Of course Moss was scared of his family and after being caught in a heavy scene he cried rape and lied.... thus destroying Llews life.
Llew spent 8 years in prison for a crime he didn't commit and almost went under as he was constantly assaulted for being a "sex offender" He was saved by Ace and made it through prison.
As Llew tried to assimilate back into life he struggled with the wrongful terms of his parole and release and found that people were unforgiving and gave him no chance - until he met Ma and Shane. Finally some good through the crap.
I have to say my heart broke for Llew and I couldn't stop reading hoping to see him find justice & peace. For the sheer emotions and Llews heart & persistence in this book I gave it 5 stars. I adored this character, Shane his lover, Ace his savior and Leslie his brother and rock. ❤❤❤
I just wanna fist pump the sky !
September 21, 2015
BR with Friends!
August 7, 2024
::Processing::
Note: I listened to Aiden Snow do the audio for this book. He was amazing 4stars.
This story was so emotionally charged and thoughtfully written that I need to process exactly what to say beyond 'it was fantastic.'
I laughed and cried. The story was amazing, the telling was well done, the dialogue was organic and heartfelt. The way she wrote this tortured- but-kindhearted character was a gut punch and, damn, I loved it. It's an entirely fucked up story, however. It's not fucked up in the way of cat and mouse level of fuckery but it's fucked up because of the incredible disappointment that comes in the form of fear, love, lies, denial, and deceit...The harsh reality that this actually happens. Good people have terrible things happen to them and people they love let them down so completely that it nearly (and often does) breaks them. That's the kind of fucked up this story is. It hurts. And not in the 'edge of my seat' 'what kind of crazy ass shit is he going to do next?' pure giddy gnar that I also enjoy. But, in the 'my heart hurts for this totally fictional character and now I'm in my head over it' kind of way.
It was a little spicy...the MC could have developed his natural dom calling in a little more depth since there were allusions to this being who he truly was and needed to be with a partner...and also kind of the crux of his plight to begin with, if you want to see it that way... But, this one criticism does not at all take away from the overall story. Often in books "I love you's" come pretty abruptly after "I like you, now STFUATTD" .....aaaaand this totally happened in this story too! BUT I didn't hate it because the MC so neeeeeded love. And honestly his partner was beautifully imagined for him. In fact, all the characters on his way to healing were beautiful.
Note: I listened to Aiden Snow do the audio for this book. He was amazing 4stars.
This story was so emotionally charged and thoughtfully written that I need to process exactly what to say beyond 'it was fantastic.'
I laughed and cried. The story was amazing, the telling was well done, the dialogue was organic and heartfelt. The way she wrote this tortured- but-kindhearted character was a gut punch and, damn, I loved it. It's an entirely fucked up story, however. It's not fucked up in the way of cat and mouse level of fuckery but it's fucked up because of the incredible disappointment that comes in the form of fear, love, lies, denial, and deceit...The harsh reality that this actually happens. Good people have terrible things happen to them and people they love let them down so completely that it nearly (and often does) breaks them. That's the kind of fucked up this story is. It hurts. And not in the 'edge of my seat' 'what kind of crazy ass shit is he going to do next?' pure giddy gnar that I also enjoy. But, in the 'my heart hurts for this totally fictional character and now I'm in my head over it' kind of way.
It was a little spicy...the MC could have developed his natural dom calling in a little more depth since there were allusions to this being who he truly was and needed to be with a partner...and also kind of the crux of his plight to begin with, if you want to see it that way... But, this one criticism does not at all take away from the overall story. Often in books "I love you's" come pretty abruptly after "I like you, now STFUATTD" .....aaaaand this totally happened in this story too! BUT I didn't hate it because the MC so neeeeeded love. And honestly his partner was beautifully imagined for him. In fact, all the characters on his way to healing were beautiful.
April 2, 2015
This is an angsty story. Angstier than what I'm used to from this author.
After a night of passion that goes wrong, Llewellyn 's life is pretty much ruined. Eight years later, he's trying to pick up the pieces and start over, but his past is always catching up on him.
Shane is his new boss in a construction company. He 's instanly attracted to Llewellyn and soon they form a tentative relationship.
For some reason, I never managed to feel the connection between the MCs, no matter how hard I tried. Maybe it was just me, maybe it was the fact that the characters met each other for the first time 35% into the book. I honestly don't know.
I did like the concept and the plot very much. I also liked the first part of the book that described all the shit Llewellyn had to go through, and the fact that I prefer the part of the book where the MCs hadn't even met says something about my feelings for their relationship.
But...I LOVED Ace...he is an intriguing character and I hope the author gives him a story...
Overall it a was a nice read
After a night of passion that goes wrong, Llewellyn 's life is pretty much ruined. Eight years later, he's trying to pick up the pieces and start over, but his past is always catching up on him.
Shane is his new boss in a construction company. He 's instanly attracted to Llewellyn and soon they form a tentative relationship.
For some reason, I never managed to feel the connection between the MCs, no matter how hard I tried. Maybe it was just me, maybe it was the fact that the characters met each other for the first time 35% into the book. I honestly don't know.
I did like the concept and the plot very much. I also liked the first part of the book that described all the shit Llewellyn had to go through, and the fact that I prefer the part of the book where the MCs hadn't even met says something about my feelings for their relationship.
But...I LOVED Ace...he is an intriguing character and I hope the author gives him a story...
Overall it a was a nice read
October 24, 2015
4.5 stars! Good Lord, the first half of this book completely broke me. Poor Llew. Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse for him, they did. Major sadness and angst.
The second half of the book wasn't quite as good IMO. It was a bit rushed, including some insta-love and the unbelievably quick resolution of some issues that had been plaguing Llewellyn for years. But I still enjoyed it. This is my first book from this author, but I'm already going through her back catalogue to add more to my TBR.
The second half of the book wasn't quite as good IMO. It was a bit rushed, including some insta-love and the unbelievably quick resolution of some issues that had been plaguing Llewellyn for years. But I still enjoyed it. This is my first book from this author, but I'm already going through her back catalogue to add more to my TBR.
April 14, 2022
Even better the 2nd time around!!!!
5 infinite stars audio and story! I'm not big on rereads but this one was sure worth it!!!
5 infinite stars audio and story! I'm not big on rereads but this one was sure worth it!!!
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October 20, 2023
MM Romance
Angstfest
4 Stars ⭐️
🎵Included for free with my Audible subscription
🎵Narrated by: Aiden Snow 🔥 I liked this author’s growly voice before this book but I had no idea the amount of range he had until listening to this one. Absolutely wowed and can’t wait to listen to more.
I really enjoyed this but damn was it heartbreaking and incredibly hard for me to listen to. I had a close friend that went through something quite similar to Llewellyn only there was no HEA for him. 😔 This book would have made me sad regardless but I was not prepared for how much I’d sob while reading it and almost DNF’d it a few times when it brought back memories that still hurt even 20 years later. There was a picture of us taken on my 19th birthday that I see whenever his memory crosses my mind. Both of us smiling like fools, our faces smooshed together, freckles connecting, blue eyes shining with happiness, and completely oblivious to the world of hurt the next year would bring. So, this is why it’s taken me almost a week to review this because some of the scenes in this book made me super teary eyed even after finishing it. However, I don’t regret reading it, so thanks Kati 💗💗 for the book rec. You know I love angst and Aiden Snow’s voice is just 🔥🔥
I don’t want to say too much because it will ruin the story but what Llew went through was just hard to read. This book gave me anxiety at times hoping that there would be a light at the end of the tunnel and because this is a romance book, it gave me that but it was a rough road there. I adored Shane, Llew’s love interest, and even though their feelings for each other felt kind of fast, it was exactly what Llew needed. This love wasn’t going to fix Llew but it let him move forward to a future he never expected to have after everything he lost. The reason I can’t 5 star this is because as nice as the resolution to this entire book was, it just wasn’t all that believable to me, most likely because I’ve seen the real thing play out. But that’s definitely a me problem and everyone else will probably love it. Definitely glad I gave this author another whirl.
And…As much as I wanted hellhounds to take care of someone in this book, by the end I felt so conflicted. It was horrible what he did but I’d read a redemption story which was super surprising to me considering my past. 🤷🏻♀️
Angstfest
4 Stars ⭐️
🎵Included for free with my Audible subscription
🎵Narrated by: Aiden Snow 🔥 I liked this author’s growly voice before this book but I had no idea the amount of range he had until listening to this one. Absolutely wowed and can’t wait to listen to more.
I really enjoyed this but damn was it heartbreaking and incredibly hard for me to listen to. I had a close friend that went through something quite similar to Llewellyn only there was no HEA for him. 😔 This book would have made me sad regardless but I was not prepared for how much I’d sob while reading it and almost DNF’d it a few times when it brought back memories that still hurt even 20 years later. There was a picture of us taken on my 19th birthday that I see whenever his memory crosses my mind. Both of us smiling like fools, our faces smooshed together, freckles connecting, blue eyes shining with happiness, and completely oblivious to the world of hurt the next year would bring. So, this is why it’s taken me almost a week to review this because some of the scenes in this book made me super teary eyed even after finishing it. However, I don’t regret reading it, so thanks Kati 💗💗 for the book rec. You know I love angst and Aiden Snow’s voice is just 🔥🔥
I don’t want to say too much because it will ruin the story but what Llew went through was just hard to read. This book gave me anxiety at times hoping that there would be a light at the end of the tunnel and because this is a romance book, it gave me that but it was a rough road there. I adored Shane, Llew’s love interest, and even though their feelings for each other felt kind of fast, it was exactly what Llew needed. This love wasn’t going to fix Llew but it let him move forward to a future he never expected to have after everything he lost. The reason I can’t 5 star this is because as nice as the resolution to this entire book was, it just wasn’t all that believable to me, most likely because I’ve seen the real thing play out. But that’s definitely a me problem and everyone else will probably love it. Definitely glad I gave this author another whirl.
And…As much as I wanted hellhounds to take care of someone in this book, by the end I felt so conflicted. It was horrible what he did but I’d read a redemption story which was super surprising to me considering my past. 🤷🏻♀️
February 23, 2020
4.5 stars
February 9, 2025
BEST BOOK EVER
“Oh god. Your voice is too much for me to let go.” Shane tightened his grip on Llew’s neck. “You’re gonna have to pull my hands off of you.”
Oh my God, I totally fell in love with Llew and Shane all over again!
Like, seriously, how can you not root for them? Their connection is so real, and watching them grow together was just the purest thing ever. This story is all about love, healing, and loyalty, and honestly, it reminded me exactly why I’ve always been obsessed with their relationship.
But let’s be real, it’s not all sunshine and roses - there were definitely moments that had me frustrated as hell.
The writing is Chef’s kiss. It pulls you in hard. You feel every emotion, every little glance, every tension filled moment like you're right there with Llew and Shane. The pacing was on point, so we get the sweet moments mixed in with all those tense, edge-of-your-seat scenes that keep you flipping pages at 2 AM. And honestly, the emotional depth. Nailed It! Every look, every touch, every little thing they just burn together.
“You’re fucking gorgeous. Everything about you is sexy, especially your quiet power. I can see you fighting not to throw me on the floor and fuck me through it. But that can and will come later.”
But, and i hate to do this! There were a couple of moments where I was like, “ Wait, that's it?” Like, Moss, Llew’s manipulative ex? Total jerk. And while he’s clearly a major source of tension, his little “wrap up” at the end… Kind of a letdown. Like, after all the crap he put Llew through, I wanted him to suffer. I was expecting fireworks, and instead, I got a sparkler.
But, seriously, the real magic is in Llew and Shane’s dynamic. Llew’s whole journey is about healing, and watching him figure out how to trust and love again. So beautiful.
And Shane. That guy is like the perfect combination of protective without being suffocating. You can just feel how much he loves Llew. They balance each other so well - like, these two are my favorit couple.
“Please don’t hold back, Llewell. I’m begging you. Don’t hold back. I’ve waited so long for this, was waiting before you even came into to town, I fuckin’ needed this.” Shane panted.”
And can we talk about Ace for a second? I am obsessed. This guy deserves his own book, like yesterday. His friendship with Llew is so heartwarming, and he is hilarious in the best way. He’s that friend who’s always got your back, and honestly, I was just hoping for more of him in the story. Seriously, give Ace his own book, please.
Sure, there were a couple of little hiccups, but trust me, this book is 100% worth the read, especially if you love a good, emotional journey of love and growth. You’ll be rooting for them the whole way through.
“Oh god. Your voice is too much for me to let go.” Shane tightened his grip on Llew’s neck. “You’re gonna have to pull my hands off of you.”
Oh my God, I totally fell in love with Llew and Shane all over again!
Like, seriously, how can you not root for them? Their connection is so real, and watching them grow together was just the purest thing ever. This story is all about love, healing, and loyalty, and honestly, it reminded me exactly why I’ve always been obsessed with their relationship.
But let’s be real, it’s not all sunshine and roses - there were definitely moments that had me frustrated as hell.
The writing is Chef’s kiss. It pulls you in hard. You feel every emotion, every little glance, every tension filled moment like you're right there with Llew and Shane. The pacing was on point, so we get the sweet moments mixed in with all those tense, edge-of-your-seat scenes that keep you flipping pages at 2 AM. And honestly, the emotional depth. Nailed It! Every look, every touch, every little thing they just burn together.
“You’re fucking gorgeous. Everything about you is sexy, especially your quiet power. I can see you fighting not to throw me on the floor and fuck me through it. But that can and will come later.”
But, and i hate to do this! There were a couple of moments where I was like, “ Wait, that's it?” Like, Moss, Llew’s manipulative ex? Total jerk. And while he’s clearly a major source of tension, his little “wrap up” at the end… Kind of a letdown. Like, after all the crap he put Llew through, I wanted him to suffer. I was expecting fireworks, and instead, I got a sparkler.
But, seriously, the real magic is in Llew and Shane’s dynamic. Llew’s whole journey is about healing, and watching him figure out how to trust and love again. So beautiful.
And Shane. That guy is like the perfect combination of protective without being suffocating. You can just feel how much he loves Llew. They balance each other so well - like, these two are my favorit couple.
“Please don’t hold back, Llewell. I’m begging you. Don’t hold back. I’ve waited so long for this, was waiting before you even came into to town, I fuckin’ needed this.” Shane panted.”
And can we talk about Ace for a second? I am obsessed. This guy deserves his own book, like yesterday. His friendship with Llew is so heartwarming, and he is hilarious in the best way. He’s that friend who’s always got your back, and honestly, I was just hoping for more of him in the story. Seriously, give Ace his own book, please.
Sure, there were a couple of little hiccups, but trust me, this book is 100% worth the read, especially if you love a good, emotional journey of love and growth. You’ll be rooting for them the whole way through.
February 8, 2020
5+++ Oh boy, I really don’t know where to begin. I want to say so much! This was an above-average story. I couldn’t believe all the things happening before my eyes.
So much story. I was deeply, deeply moved.
Many heavy emotions passed by. I’ll try to sketch my review.
After reading the first chapters I wanted to throw a bunch of curses. I felt so f@cked up after reading how Llewellyn was wronged, my heart raced with all the anger and injustice.
Llew had a big future before him until he got jailed and the only thing that kept him alive was Ace. Ace was respected by many other inmates and Ace believed in his innocence.
After eight years Llew is back in society, only society doesn’t seem to take him back.
Again, my heart, I couldn’t handle it well.
Thank goodness there are a few people who showed respect. Take Shane.
“What’s happening to you now is but a moment in your life.”
Shane sees only the beautiful man Llew is. Shane is sensual with the most wonderful voice. He sees Llew and wants him out of his isolation.
Shane developed deep feelings for the quiet man.
Llew can’t see any light in his future. Only he didn’t know how persistent Shane was. With sweet talk, purrs, and warmth he convinced Llew he’s honest about what he says, sees and wants from Llew. Shane was everything! I couldn’t believe my eyes.
“So are you.”
So many feelings coming off the pages. The expression put in the sentences were outstanding. The oppressive atmosphere was thrilling.
I found it a monumental story, it floored me.
There are so many precious moments, I wanted to keep them to relive them.
Llew and Shane together were unbelievably beautiful. To follow their moving hands, every caress, every gesture was just breathtaking. Llew opening his hurt soul was something to bow over.
The author did an amazing job. To write such a captivatingly, moving story.
What I really wanted to do was review and use only hyperboles to make clear how wonderful and impressive this story was.
The end gave me goosebumps and my tears fell unstoppable.
Highly recommended!
So much story. I was deeply, deeply moved.
Many heavy emotions passed by. I’ll try to sketch my review.
After reading the first chapters I wanted to throw a bunch of curses. I felt so f@cked up after reading how Llewellyn was wronged, my heart raced with all the anger and injustice.
Llew had a big future before him until he got jailed and the only thing that kept him alive was Ace. Ace was respected by many other inmates and Ace believed in his innocence.
After eight years Llew is back in society, only society doesn’t seem to take him back.
Again, my heart, I couldn’t handle it well.
Thank goodness there are a few people who showed respect. Take Shane.
“What’s happening to you now is but a moment in your life.”
Shane sees only the beautiful man Llew is. Shane is sensual with the most wonderful voice. He sees Llew and wants him out of his isolation.
Shane developed deep feelings for the quiet man.
Llew can’t see any light in his future. Only he didn’t know how persistent Shane was. With sweet talk, purrs, and warmth he convinced Llew he’s honest about what he says, sees and wants from Llew. Shane was everything! I couldn’t believe my eyes.
“So are you.”
So many feelings coming off the pages. The expression put in the sentences were outstanding. The oppressive atmosphere was thrilling.
I found it a monumental story, it floored me.
There are so many precious moments, I wanted to keep them to relive them.
Llew and Shane together were unbelievably beautiful. To follow their moving hands, every caress, every gesture was just breathtaking. Llew opening his hurt soul was something to bow over.
The author did an amazing job. To write such a captivatingly, moving story.
What I really wanted to do was review and use only hyperboles to make clear how wonderful and impressive this story was.
The end gave me goosebumps and my tears fell unstoppable.
Highly recommended!
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