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Spectacles

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8h 44m

When I began writing this book, I went home to see if my mum had kept some of my stuff. What I found was that she hadn't kept some of it. She had kept all of it - every bus ticket, postcard, school report - from the moment I was born to the moment I finally had the confidence to turn round and say 'Why is our house full of this shit?'

Sadly, a recycling 'incident' destroyed the bulk of this archive. This has meant two things: firstly, Dear Reader, you will never get to see countless drawings of wizards, read a poem about corn on the cob, or marvel at the kilos of brown flowers I so lovingly pressed as a child. Secondly, it's left me with no choice but to actually write this thing myself.

This, my first ever book, will answer questions such as 'Is Mary Berry real?', 'Is it true you wear a surgical truss?' and 'Is a non-spherically symmetric gravitational pull from outside the observable universe responsible for some of the observed motion of large objects such as galactic clusters in the universe?'

Most of this book is true. I have, of course, amplified my more positive characteristics in an effort to make you like me.

Thank you for reading.

377 pages, Hardcover

First published October 8, 2015

358 people are currently reading
4976 people want to read

About the author

Sue Perkins

11 books283 followers
Susan Elizabeth Perkins (born 22 September 1969) is a British comedian and broadcaster, born in East Dulwich, London, England.

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 905 reviews
Profile Image for [ J o ].
1,962 reviews541 followers
January 20, 2023
Sue Perkins is best known as being one-half of the comedic double act Mel and Sue, and most notably as the ex-presenter of The Great British Bake-Off and Light/Late Lunch. She's also done a host of other lovely television stuff, like being in and writing for French and Saunders. However, unlike a lot of other comedians-double-acts or otherwise-her career never catapulted her fame quite as far as some.

What's the difference between a memoir and an autobiography? There are some small differences, but the biggest one in my not quite that humble opinion is writing ability. Sue Perkins hasn't written an autobiography, but a memoir. Which is probably why it says that right there on the cover.

Sue Perkins is my least favourite in the Mel and Sue double-act. I'm not ashamed to say it, but everyone has a favourite in double acts. Eric, Jennifer, Rik, Peter, Barker, Bob, Mel, Duds, David, Ben, Frank, Barry, Stephen, David... You get the message. Favourites are inevitable, even when there are two funny men and no straight men.

Sue Perkins is a writer, first and foremost. Her prose flows from the page in to my awaiting brain so well, like a lesser-known waterfall calmly dripping down each little rock. She has a scintillating way of telling a story, even if it is her own story, that just runs so easily you almost forget it's a biography. That's the fundamental difference between an autobiography and a memoir. You forget it is about a real human being and just settle down and enjoy the story.

Her life is no different to anyone else's. She is normal-something we all need reminding of a lot more these days-and her life is full of wonderful ups and woeful downs, but it all evens itself out eventually. There are no life secrets here: no little hints of how to get yourself on to television. You either want it and try, or you don't. Most famous people-comic people especially-seem to accidentally fall in to, but really it's the complete opposite. It's just that the air-headed fame-hunting nature isn't there, just the drive to entertain.

And the humour is so on point it hurts. You may be reading something really poignant or sad, and yet the humour is never far behind. Some may call it a coping mechanism, but those of us who use it, call it the only way we know how to live. I nearly wet myself laughing so much at this, and that rarely happens even with comedians autobiographies. Even the saddest moments in anyone's life will always have a touch of humour to them. We're human; that's just what we do. It is the only thing that makes life bearable, and Sue Perkins makes our lives just that much more manageable.
Profile Image for Bethan.
59 reviews20 followers
August 6, 2016
Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. This is one of my best reads of 2016 and I'm not ashamed to say it. I've always loved Sue Perkins, but this book makes me love her even more.

My heart strings haven't just been pulled, they have wrenched and torn apart. She has made me laugh out loud and cry like a baby.

With other biographies I've read, such as "Cheryl" - even though they (as in the Celebrities) have supposedly written it, you still feel as if you are getting an outsiders perspective. Not with this book. This is Sue through and through.
Profile Image for Jo (The Book Geek).
925 reviews
December 23, 2018
Sue Perkins is a favourite person of mine. She comes across as intelligent, funny, down to earth, and she seems honest, which is always important. As far as celebrity memoirs go, I usually avoid them like the plague, but as it is Sue Perkins, I thought I'd make an exception.

Reading her stories of the highs and lows of her life, made it feel like I was sitting in a cafe, eating Victoria sponge and drinking coffee with an old friend. Some parts in this had me laughing out loud, some had me cringing in embarrassment, but, one particular chapter had me welling up with tears. Sue Perkins writes a letter to her dog, that sadly died, after a battle with illness, and it is written just so poignantly and heartfelt, it kind of ripped my heart out and was left hanging there awkwardly. It was beautiful.

Sue Perkins writes an honest, thoughtful, hilarious and an actually kind of sensitive memoir here, and if we ever met, I'd really like to think that we'd get along. I'm looking forward to reading her next book, that was released in October.
Profile Image for Vanessa.
951 reviews1,219 followers
September 6, 2016
This was one of the most enjoyable audiobooks I've ever listened to. I'm a big fan of Sue Perkins, having watched her on The Supersizers Go... and The Supersizers Eat..., as well as of course my beloved The Great British Bake-Off. So of course I had to pick up her own autobiograhy on audiobook, as it was narrated by her!

I really enjoyed listening to Sue's family life, the lessons she learned growing up, her relationship with Mel Giedroyc, the hard times (break ups, pet deaths), and her own romantic relationships. Sue is an incredibly funny woman, and also incredibly relatable, and she is perfect for narrating audiobooks. I loved all of her different voices and impressions she did of people, and the chapter on the Bake Off itself was brilliant.

If you're a fan of Sue Perkins and/or memoirs, this is a great one to pick up. But obviously get it on audiobook, you won't regret it.
Profile Image for Jessica (Jess Hearts Books).
748 reviews440 followers
January 18, 2016
Sue Perkins is one of my favourite celebrities. She comes across as intelligent, funny, kind and like someone who has endless fascinating stories to share. I’m not usually interested in celebrity memoirs or autobiographies but was sold on the audiobook version of this with it being narrated by Sue Perkins herself.

Sue’s narration brings this audiobook to life. Listening to her stories is like going to the pub with an old friend for a catch up. I listened to this audiobook whilst doing chores and getting ready in the mornings and it made those mundane tasks so much more bearable. Not many people can make me laugh out loud at 7am on a Monday morning but Sue Perkins did. Not many people can make me cry whilst putting my mascara on but Sue Perkins did.

This book covers cake, travel, dogs, lesbianism, comedy, friendship, family and feminism all delivered in Sue's trademark humorous, warm and intelligent narrative. What's not to love?
Profile Image for Nicky.
4,138 reviews1,110 followers
February 7, 2017
Spectacles was kind of fun to read in bits, but it felt like it lost direction and momentum rather. The bits where Perkins discusses her father are very touching; there are some pithy quotes about looking back on the past and why we like to romanticise it; there’s some funny bits… but ultimately, I felt rather underwhelmed. I feel like it might’ve been more fun if delivered by Sue Perkins aloud, with her own intonation and style and sense of timing flavouring the words. As it is, it begins to feel rather flat, because the tone is all perky and funny in the same sort of way, all the way through.

This is not to say there weren’t bits which were worth it. There definitely are, like the discussions of her father, the section where she has to keep coming out to her grandmother, and the death of her dog. But the bits about roadtrips for BBC documentaries weren’t so fun, and the Bake Off parts weren’t as prevalent as I imagine people would hope. (I’m more devoted to the Sewing Bee, possibly because I know more about sewing than I do about baking.)

But overall, underwhelmed is the term.

Originally posted here.
Profile Image for Karina.
637 reviews62 followers
August 28, 2015
One of the funniest books I've read in ages, this is an absolute pleasure that made my workmates check on me on my lunch break, I was guffawing so hard. Sue is hilarious, sharp, insightful and never met a cake she could refuse...if you enjoy watching her tremendously enjoyable partnership with Mel Giedroyc on the Great British Bake Off, you need this book like Mary Berry needs a G&T at the end of a long day's feeling of soggy bottoms...
Profile Image for Katie.
829 reviews14 followers
April 20, 2017
Sue in her own voice.

Its really good friends, in the way that well written and thought out memoirs can be. I don’t know if its very Sue-ness would come across to the uninitiated, but if you are a Sue fan and are looking for more stories of her growing up in Croydon, or attending Cambridge, or breaking into the comedy/television presenter world then this is your book. She’s insightful and honest about her own strengths and weaknesses and you will absolutely fall in love with her parents. She uses her wit and comedic skills to unpack the world around her, and the way she sees it, and asks you to do the same with the world around you. Or just think of some really great double entendres.

full review: https://faintingviolet.wordpress.com/...
Profile Image for Miranda Saville.
442 reviews9 followers
January 14, 2017
I never laugh out loud when reading...until now - at several points I literally had tears rolling down my cheeks whilst in fits of giggles. This is never going to achieve heights of literary greatness but what a fabulous, cheer yourself up, chase away the January blues, pile of bliss this book is! Thanks Sue, I thoroughly enjoyed it!
Profile Image for Lynn.
200 reviews10 followers
December 28, 2017
Best not read in bed with a cup of tea as you will snort it out your nose on to the bedding...hilarious, you have been warned.
Profile Image for Ellie.
1,565 reviews290 followers
December 23, 2015
Spectacles is Sue Perkins’ memoir covering her life so far from the day she popped out (her mum made notes during labour) through to her time filming shows such as The World’s Most Dangerous Roads (she was told it was Interesting Roads when she agreed) and some baking show called The Great British Bake Off.

Sue on paper is pretty much the same as Sue on TV and she comes across as a genuinely lovely, if self-deprecating, person. I’m pretty sure Bake Off wouldn’t have been such a hit without her and Mel. If you’re hoping for loads of behind the baking scenes gossip, this isn’t that book. One chapter deals with Bake Off, which Sue initially turned down (this is a recurring theme in her life), but mostly covers the first series. Following on from this we’ve gone and downloaded series one from BBC Store and the show has come a long way. There’s also a few tongue-in-cheek bits, where Sue answers some FAQs and gives a fake sneak peak of next year’s show.

I’ve been a fan of Sue since the days of Light Lunch and I’ve recently re-watched the wonderful Supersizers where she and Giles Coren eat their way through history and get thoroughly drunk. I wasn’t aware she started out as a comedy duo with Mel and this book covers their early days.

It also has a lot about Sue’s childhood but told in a rather entertaining way. There’s some sad bits too. I nearly cried on the bus reading the letter she wrote to her dead dog. Yup, this book needs a Death of Dog Warning. But she also made me laugh in the very same letter. That’s a skill. I particularly liked the part where Sue tries to report a hate crime to the police...well you'll just have to read it to find out.

I would like to think I'd get along with Sue if I met her. If you're intent of buying people celebrity autobiographies for Christmas, you could do a lot worse than Spectacles. Unless maybe they're expecting Jeremy Clarkson's...
Profile Image for Jo.
964 reviews48 followers
September 15, 2017
If you already love Sue Perkins, this will reaffirm/increase your love for her (it did for me). She talks about her dogs a LOT, but dogs are ace, so that's okay. And she's super funny and lovely. Enjoyed it very much, and not just the Bake Off chapter (although that was one of the best).
Profile Image for Chlöe Rogers.
41 reviews4 followers
February 22, 2016
This book is hilarious. I laughed out loud so many times reading it, and had to hold in laughter many more times since I do most of my reading on public transport... I love Sue Perkins :')
Profile Image for Claire Huston.
Author 5 books156 followers
September 29, 2016
Little did I know, when I picked Sue Perkins’ memoir up in a charity shop a month ago, just how topical it would be to feature this book now! 4 stars.

This review was originally posted on my book blog.

For those of you who don’t live in the UK or haven’t come across shows like The Great British Bake Off, Sue Perkins is a TV presenter and one half of a comedy double act with her best friend Melanie Giedroyc. Their style of comedy is witty, whimsical and sometimes a little offbeat. And if you know who Sue Perkins is and find her funny at all, you’ll enjoy reading Spectacles.

I expected this book to be funny; but I was expecting chuckles or the odd smirk. I wasn’t expecting to nearly choke because I was laughing so hard and have to put the book down to wheeze myself back from the brink of passing out. The funniest passages were nearly all of those in which she described incidents involving her family, particularly her parents. You quickly see where she got her gift for comedy from and why she’s so good at dealing with perhaps the more eccentric contestants on Bake Off.

Her tone is as frank as you’d expect and when she recounts events which don’t put her in a good light, she doesn’t try to shirk responsibility for her actions and takes the opportunity to make apologies.

But, for all the more serious moments in her story, this book leaves you with a good feeling. It’s interesting, easy to read, funny and has just enough inside dirt on Bake Off to keep fans of the show happy.

Oh, and if you like dogs, you’ll like this as well. There’s a lot of love for dogs here. And the stories involving them are funny (and a bit sad too, but mostly funny).

Overall: if you find the Sue Perkins you’ve seen on TV likeable and amusing, this is a memoir you’ll enjoy!
Profile Image for chucklesthescot.
2,995 reviews134 followers
July 5, 2017
The book got off to a poor start for me with the introduction which says that parts of the book are embellished, characters are invented, punchlines are created for comic effect and the details are skewed for laughs. So what are you saying, this is a semi fiction book made up with stuff that isn't true to seem funnier??? If I buy a book claiming to be true and read THAT in the introduction, I'm not going to be a happy bunny.

The writing style I found to be poor. I found the long supposed conversations with her family contrived and it was painful to see the attempts to force a laugh out of the reader on every line. To be honest this family bit at the start of every chapter made them all look to be either crazy or a bit sad. It did none of them any favours. The details in the stories seem a bit inane and at times, not very relevant or interesting. The use of the forced conversations and strange lists at the start of each chapter were baffling, and I wasn't entertained by it at all.

This was a serious letdown as I'm not sure exactly what the book was trying to be. Was it a funny semi-fiction-semi-factual book based on people and events in her life? Was it an embellished biography? I don't know what to make of it. If I don't know what's true and what is made up, what's the point in reading it at all? The forced attempts at humour fell flat and I didn't enjoy it at all.
Profile Image for Lisa - OwlBeSatReading .
489 reviews
September 9, 2016
3.5 Stars

I really like Sue Perkins, she makes me laugh. Her and Mel with their double entendres on Bake Off is just pure childish class.

Sues biography is an entertaining read, from early childhood (being born!) to her present Bake Off fame, this book gives a thorough insight into Sues life, loves and crazy shenanigans. She's a feisty one I'd say! There's a few sad moments, with a good scattering of lol's along the way, I read this in a day as it was easy to read and very enjoyable.

However, like many autobiographies I've read, the details will fade and I'll be left with just one or two nuggets of info I've remembered. There wasn't anything spectacular in this memoir. But that's a normal life for most, Sue is just like you or I.
I also liked the book because she is close to my age so a lot of her childhood/teenage years I could really relate to.

Overall, very enjoyable. And now I know what the team at Bake Off really do in-between takes on set ;)

Paul Hollywoods hair gel brand. Shocking.
Profile Image for Nick Davies.
1,712 reviews58 followers
August 25, 2017
I wouldn't describe myself as a particularly huge fan of Sue Perkins, of Bake Off, or of much of her other work (I do remember 'Light Lunch' when I was a student, and some of the eating and travel stuff she has done has been excellent) but had read some good reviews of this from fellow readers, so picked it up when I saw it in a charity shop.

I was pleasantly very surprised - Perkins has written a very funny, very interesting and varied, very readable, autobiography here. The criticism of most comedian autobiographies I have read - that after the funny childhood anecdotes are done with, the latter half of these books can get a bit 'name droppy' in the adulthood sections - was never an issue here. I might have to reassess my opinion that Mel was always my favourite :-)
Profile Image for Helen French.
519 reviews21 followers
August 10, 2016
This was just okay. Sue Perkins has a fantastically emotive voice but actually I found many chapters quite dull. She reveals a lot of events that happen, but not much of her soul. The autobiography jumps around the timeline somewhat. There's a bit of Bake-Off (Baaaaaaake!), but just as much on random programmes that I didn't care about when they aired or now that I know about them in forensic detail. It's a strange one. I listened to the audiobook in the car and she made me cry at least twice (dead dog and dead friend), and laugh a few times too. Yet something was missing. Hmm.
Profile Image for Sue.
176 reviews
December 31, 2016
I don't know why I keep reading these kind of books, they are always a disappointment. I haven't read an autobiography in the last few years that is worth the money I paid out for it. This one left me feeling that most of the good bits were left out. It went on and on like a very long, standup comedy act. I like Sue Perkins and I think she is a good writer but maybe next time try fiction.
Profile Image for Rachel Stroud.
4 reviews4 followers
October 17, 2015
Enjoyed this - easy to read and funny, but it felt a bit guarded. I was hoping to find out more about Sue Perkins herself and didn't feel unlearned that much about her life beyond the TV shows she's been in.
Profile Image for Alice.
84 reviews6 followers
November 2, 2015
Started off a bit clunky but the anecdotes got funnier and I really enjoyed it by the end. I'm still laughing whenever the thought of Esther Rantzen in her Mercedes comes back into my head.
Profile Image for Amy.
153 reviews2 followers
May 9, 2021
Absolutely loved this and had to keep stopping to look up videos of Sue conducting and driving the HCM trail! Lots that I now want to watch as a result. Her letter to her dog had me in floods of tears but I was laughing out loud at many other points. Fab book, thoroughly enjoyed it
Profile Image for Shauna.
412 reviews
August 25, 2022
I feel like I am damning this book with faint praise but it was quite interesting and fairly amusing. I don't feel like we are much nearer to finding out what makes Sue Perkins tick than before reading this 'sort of 'autobiography but it is worth reading if you have seen her on tv or indeed, heard her on the radio, and want to know her history.
Profile Image for Jennifer Joyce.
Author 23 books138 followers
January 11, 2016
I adore Mel and Sue, right back from watching Light Lunch in the school holidays when I was a teenager, so when Sue Perkins released her memoir I had to read it. Sue never fails to make me laugh whenever I see her on TV and her book was just the same. The book is jam-packed with fun snippets from Sue's life, told in her unique style that had me giggling to myself at some points, cringing at others and full-on laughing out loud at the hilarious anecdotes.

But the book isn't just a funny look at Sue's life. It delves far deeper, revealing some of the more difficult points. While the book offers a lot of giggles, it also gives the old heartstrings a thorough workout. I don't want to spoil anything from the book but here's a little tip: when you get to the letter Sue wrote to her dog, make sure you have tissues to hand. Lots and lots of tissues.

One of my favourite aspects of the book was finding out more about Sue's friendship with Mel, from how they met and began working together. The strong bond they have is evident from the pages of Spectacles - as well as the fun they have together and the book only made me love them more. I also enjoyed the relationships between Sue and her family and another highlight of the book for me was Sue's recollection of coming out to her mum. Again, I really, really don't want to spoil anything but Ann Perkins, you rock.

There are so many great aspects of this book (Sue's brief encounter with Esther Rantzen, for example) that I didn't want it to end. Full of laughs, love and the highs and lows of life, Spectacles is a fantastic insight into the world of a very funny lady.
Profile Image for Michelle_Mck.
65 reviews44 followers
July 28, 2016
First off it has to be said that I love Sue Perkins and I am obsessed with Bake Off, its one of the few shows me and my Mum have to watch together and we always end up talking to my aunty and everyone we can about it. When I heard that Sue was writing a memoir I knew I would have to listen to this one on Audio Book, I'm so glad I did because to hear Sue tell the stories, well there were more than a few moments of snorting listening.

There are many great moments in the book, it is a great mix of detail and fun story. You have some sad and crazy funny moments. Sue's inability to drive a car for one made me laugh out loud. I cried as she told the story of Mel her comedy partner getting married, that she was the odd one out and what would that mean for her and Mel, that she went a bit crazy and Mel's brand new husband knew that she was part of a package deal almost.

Her family, their house, the garage and their summer holidays are all wonderful stories and you can really see how Sue because the funny lady she is. I hope that in a few years she might write a series of essays or something because I don't want to wait another 10 years or more for her to write another volume.

Its people like sue that will hopefully change the way people feel about LGBTQ and their community, she is a wonderful lady people see on their TV they can relate to and I hope will be more respectful of the community.

It is a wonderful read and everyone should listen to this on Audio, it is a true joy to listen too.
Profile Image for Monica Mac.
1,645 reviews37 followers
June 5, 2016
I started reading this because of a recommendation from a fellow THE Book Club member, Dave Hardy, and boy, am I glad that I did!

I have to admit that I don't read a lot of biographies, some of the ones I have read in the past, have been less than interesting - I certainly couldn't say that about this one though. I have always liked and admired Sue Perkins, she is someone I think it would be lovely to have lunch with. The combination of a quick wit, oodles of intelligence and a wicked sense of humour is irresistible to me and her book didn't let me down one little bit.

I don't know if it is because her and I were born only a couple of years apart and her birthday is the day before mine but there were so many "aha" moments about her childhood. My dad also kept precise records of heights and weights of everyone in our house (amongst other things) and also had a thing about Dettol being the answer to everything. My mother, like Sue's mother, kept a blow-by-blow description of my birth and also liked a chat.

The whole book is a delightful peek into Sue's life, without the bad bits, which she warned us about at the beginning. I read the whole thing in 3 days, which surprised me because I didn't expect it to be so unputdownable.

This is a highly recommended read from me.

And Sue, if you are around when I come to the UK next, let's do lunch, yeah?
4 reviews
September 30, 2015
What a wonderful read! Sue's tone of voice and turn of phrase is so distinctive I felt she was sitting next to me reading aloud. Funny, charming and touching - I would highly recommend.
Profile Image for Tamsin Bourgeois.
12 reviews11 followers
October 12, 2015
lots of laughs, enjoyable but a bit too light... I wanted more depressing dark deep stuff I suppose
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