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Before You Judge Me: The Triumph and Tragedy of Michael Jackson's Last Days
A powerful chronicle of the sixteen weeks leading up to King of Pop Michael Jackson's death.
Michael Jackson's final months were like the rest of his short and legendary filled with deep lows and soaring highs, a constant hunt for privacy, and the pressure and fame that made him socially fragile and almost -- ultimately -- unable to live.
With the insight and compassion that he brought to his bestselling story of Martin Luther King, Jr.'s final year, Tavis Smiley provides a glimpse into the superstar's life in this emotional, honest, yet celebratory book. Readers will witness Jackson's campaign to recharge his career -- hiring and firing managers and advisors, turning to and away from family members, fighting depression and drug dependency -- while his one goal to mount the most spectacular series of shows the world had ever seen. Before You Judge Me is a humanizing look at Jackson's last days.
Michael Jackson's final months were like the rest of his short and legendary filled with deep lows and soaring highs, a constant hunt for privacy, and the pressure and fame that made him socially fragile and almost -- ultimately -- unable to live.
With the insight and compassion that he brought to his bestselling story of Martin Luther King, Jr.'s final year, Tavis Smiley provides a glimpse into the superstar's life in this emotional, honest, yet celebratory book. Readers will witness Jackson's campaign to recharge his career -- hiring and firing managers and advisors, turning to and away from family members, fighting depression and drug dependency -- while his one goal to mount the most spectacular series of shows the world had ever seen. Before You Judge Me is a humanizing look at Jackson's last days.
288 pages, Hardcover
First published June 21, 2016
16 people are currently reading
513 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 78 reviews
October 15, 2024
Poorly written and highly speculative. How can someone write a Biographical Account of someone's last days written as if they were inside that person's head?
Smiley writes....Michael stares out the window of the plane thinking......
Thinking what? How can he know what Michael was actually thinking??
The whole book is that way. It got tedious and boring.
I suffered through it because I hate to leave a book unfinished. I wish now I had these two days by the pool back again to have read a truly good book.
I have read dozens of books on Jackson and in my opinion this was nothing more than a Money Grab by Smiley. This was just another attempt to exploit Jackson for money.
I'm glad I got it from the public library and did not give Smiley any of my money.
It would have been Cash for Trash.
Smiley writes....Michael stares out the window of the plane thinking......
Thinking what? How can he know what Michael was actually thinking??
The whole book is that way. It got tedious and boring.
I suffered through it because I hate to leave a book unfinished. I wish now I had these two days by the pool back again to have read a truly good book.
I have read dozens of books on Jackson and in my opinion this was nothing more than a Money Grab by Smiley. This was just another attempt to exploit Jackson for money.
I'm glad I got it from the public library and did not give Smiley any of my money.
It would have been Cash for Trash.
July 9, 2016
It's a blessing and a curse to be as talented as someone like Michael Jackson. Fame and fortune tend to eat people alive it seems. I think this books presents quite clearly the demons Michael could not master and how he succumbed to them way too early. Another tragedy is the doctors willing to acquiesce to a rich/famous person and give them drugs that are dangerous and life threatening. The doctor that was intravenously giving the drug that stopped his heart (as a sleep aid of all things) got 2 1/2 years in prison for manslaughter. Another case of the punishment not fitting the crime. He should have refused to give him such a dangerous anesthesia for insomnia, but money and greed are a lethal combination. Michael, of course, was foolishly playing Russian roulette with his body by going to different doctors and getting drugs without informing them about each other. It's very sad. Everybody stood to make a buck from Michael one way or another and no one had his best interests as top priority....not even Michael.
December 6, 2016
This book broke my heart. Learning details about his troubled relationship with his family, his neverending struggle to maintain his youth, his financial and business stress - I felt overwhelmed on his behalf.
Some small portions of the book feel speculative on the part of the author - I choose to trust that Smiley's research and knowledge of his subject made him confident in his reporting.
Some small portions of the book feel speculative on the part of the author - I choose to trust that Smiley's research and knowledge of his subject made him confident in his reporting.
September 5, 2016
I first heard about this book when I saw one of the writers being interviewed by Trevor Noah on The Daily Show, and he sold the premise well.
While this book certainly was entertaining and did contain a few very interesting facts, it read as a largely fictionalised account of Michael Jackson's last days. That's not non-fiction. That's not what I was told this book was like. It's not why I chose to read it. It is clichéd in so many ways. At times it reads like an obsessed Michael Jackson fan writing bizzare fanfiction. Really.
The writers spend much of the book depicting his thought process as though they were privvy to it. They use his past song lyrics, decades old, to try and convey what he 'must' have been feeling in his last days, analysing lyrics that he didn't even write some of the time. They researched his interests and used them to further the narrative- for example, MJ liked Shakespeare so at different points the writers share certain Shakespearean dialogue that MJ *must* have been thinking in his final days. Substitute 'Shakespeare' for 'spirituality', 'Elvis Presley' or any other topic and you'll see what I mean.
Cheesy would be an understatement. Honestly, anyone with decent writing skills, an active imagination and access to Google could have written this.
While this book certainly was entertaining and did contain a few very interesting facts, it read as a largely fictionalised account of Michael Jackson's last days. That's not non-fiction. That's not what I was told this book was like. It's not why I chose to read it. It is clichéd in so many ways. At times it reads like an obsessed Michael Jackson fan writing bizzare fanfiction. Really.
The writers spend much of the book depicting his thought process as though they were privvy to it. They use his past song lyrics, decades old, to try and convey what he 'must' have been feeling in his last days, analysing lyrics that he didn't even write some of the time. They researched his interests and used them to further the narrative- for example, MJ liked Shakespeare so at different points the writers share certain Shakespearean dialogue that MJ *must* have been thinking in his final days. Substitute 'Shakespeare' for 'spirituality', 'Elvis Presley' or any other topic and you'll see what I mean.
Cheesy would be an understatement. Honestly, anyone with decent writing skills, an active imagination and access to Google could have written this.
January 14, 2018
I received this book free of charge as a first reads giveaway.
The book it written in a way that tells us what Michael is thinking, feeling, listening to, and watching on most days leading up to his death as if Michael himself is actually telling the author. No such thing happened which makes the book pure speculation. Smiley was nowhere near Michael and even admits. at the end of the book, to calling Michael's mother to ensure he gets tickets to his upcoming concert. Throughout the book Smiley details all of the people trying to use Michael as a cash cow. Add Smiley to the list.
The book it written in a way that tells us what Michael is thinking, feeling, listening to, and watching on most days leading up to his death as if Michael himself is actually telling the author. No such thing happened which makes the book pure speculation. Smiley was nowhere near Michael and even admits. at the end of the book, to calling Michael's mother to ensure he gets tickets to his upcoming concert. Throughout the book Smiley details all of the people trying to use Michael as a cash cow. Add Smiley to the list.
December 6, 2016
For a book the proposes to be about MJ's "last days", I would say over half of the book was filler and a rehashing of his life story, harking back to his childhood and Jackson 5 days. Misleading premise.
April 14, 2017
Im incredibly disappointed in this book. While Smiley claims his "conjecture about the inner workings of Michael's mind is neither whimsical nor arbitrary," I found it distracting and damaging to the book. There was nothing new about Michael's life or death here. Skip it.
December 1, 2021
I think this is the first biography of Michael Jackson I have read and while much of it seemed like conjecture, I still found it interesting and full of information new to me. Tragic story of a supremely gifted musician (and not just about the last days of his life).
December 11, 2016
Hard to know what exactly is going on inside someone's head, but Tavis attempts the daunting task in creating this book. He pulls from court documents, conversations, books, magazine articles, and interviews.
Tavis says,
"It is a studied reading based on a great many sources.
In the final analysis, though, it is an interpretation born
out of my own understanding. I view my definition of
Jackson's character not as THE truth, but rather
A truth, which is to say MY truth."
Reads extremely fast, due to the "novelistic" nature of the book which is wholly necessary to make this project interesting. Without permeating the book with suggested thoughts and feelings we would be left with just the dates, times, court transcripts, etc., surrounding Jackson's last days. And haven't most people and all who were fans, at least asked once, 'I wonder what Michael was thinking?' Well that is the question that drove this entire adventure.
Tavis says,
"It is a studied reading based on a great many sources.
In the final analysis, though, it is an interpretation born
out of my own understanding. I view my definition of
Jackson's character not as THE truth, but rather
A truth, which is to say MY truth."
Reads extremely fast, due to the "novelistic" nature of the book which is wholly necessary to make this project interesting. Without permeating the book with suggested thoughts and feelings we would be left with just the dates, times, court transcripts, etc., surrounding Jackson's last days. And haven't most people and all who were fans, at least asked once, 'I wonder what Michael was thinking?' Well that is the question that drove this entire adventure.
November 4, 2017
I was never a big fan of Michael Jackson, but I loved Thriller when I was a kid and then watched the King of Pop go from an attractive black man to Wacko Jacko. I watched him dangle his baby from the balcony, heard rumors of child molestation, and couldn't help make judgements. I saw the news reports of his controversial death but didn't know the whole story. This book explains Michael's anxiety-ridden insomnia and his reliance on an anesthetic usually only given in a hospital setting, propofol, to sleep. It also talks about his obsession with Peter Pan and with appearing "youthful". With all of Michael's wealth and interest in self-help, it is just sad that he was not able to get the mental care he needed in order to prevent his senseless death.
December 8, 2017
An interesting enough (and quick!) read. The author was very obviously idolizing MJ and waxing poetic about him, so you had to take it with a grain of salt. There was a lot of intense personal turmoil for MJ, which I found interesting because this book hit me at a time where I too am feeling intense emotional highs and lows, so I really felt for his pain.
August 19, 2016
Surprisingly well writing and a lot of neutral content so every reader can judge Michael independently. Readers that don't know Michael will met him on this great book. Great job. Will look for your other books.
February 14, 2017
The author admittedly imagines what is going on in Michael's head and heart to create a novel-like story. I'm sure it's factually accurate, but didn't care for that outlook. There are better books about Michael Jackson.
October 16, 2016
Devils, drugs and dependency.
March 9, 2017
I would have liked the book to have more material about his final days instead of filler material about his earlier life since I've already read two biographies about MJ.
September 19, 2017
The many bad decisions made by Michael in his last 4 months - all for want of a good night's sleep (without pharmaceutical help). A tragedy for his children & family & many fans.
August 30, 2018
This book was good until the last chapter when Tavis inexplicably tries to shoehorn Michael's "victory" over his demons. Dying by drug overdose before you can manifest your vision is never a victory. That's literally God saying, "Time's up!" because you've flunked your final exam. If fame was Michael Jackson's cross to bear, then he didn't carry it by following Jesus Christ. He tried to carry it in his own strength by building an ego-protecting fantasy life, gathering ear-tickling "spiritual gurus" and greedy yes-men to him for false comfort, security, peace, faith, hope, salvation...and it destroyed him! He tried to be his own savior. True faith in Christ leads to true victory over our demons and resurrection.
Matthew 16:24-26 NLT
Then Jesus said to his disciples, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must give up your own way, take up your cross, and follow me. If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it. And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul? Is anything worth more than your soul?"
JESUS: “I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid." (John 14:27 NLT)
Philippians 4:6-7 NLT
Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.
Matthew 16:24-26 NLT
Then Jesus said to his disciples, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must give up your own way, take up your cross, and follow me. If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it. And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul? Is anything worth more than your soul?"
JESUS: “I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid." (John 14:27 NLT)
Philippians 4:6-7 NLT
Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.
August 20, 2022
This book has been sitting in the TBR (to be Read) stack for years. I finally picked it up and began reading it. Now, I am a regular person who has no idea how celebrity life works so my internal monologue as I was reading this book may be off kilter. As I am reading, I think "How does Tavis know what Michael is thinking?" Mr. Smiley wasn't with Michael. Did Michael speak to Tavis after his earthly demise? More importantly, I ask, "if you were aware of Michael's self-destructive behaviors and routines and you have access to him, why are you not doing anything to reverse the behavior?" I have no idea what Michael Jackson was like as a person but I do believe adults lives are influenced by their childhoods and Michael and his children are no exceptions. Humans long for the things we do not have, the ideal the world has told us to want.
Smiley writes with phrases such as Michael thinks, Michael wants but are these true statements? Ultimately, this book is an example of sensationalize writing of a celebrity. It is an attempt to show the reader you have insight into the life of the deceased. This a book is a few facts expounded on with many suppositions.
Things I believe the authors got correct: Michael was born to Katharine and Joe. Michael Jackson is died. Michael had three children. He was an entertainer. He had challenges, triumphs and setback. He made an impact in the world.
Would I recommend this book? Not really but everyone has to choose for themselves.
Smiley writes with phrases such as Michael thinks, Michael wants but are these true statements? Ultimately, this book is an example of sensationalize writing of a celebrity. It is an attempt to show the reader you have insight into the life of the deceased. This a book is a few facts expounded on with many suppositions.
Things I believe the authors got correct: Michael was born to Katharine and Joe. Michael Jackson is died. Michael had three children. He was an entertainer. He had challenges, triumphs and setback. He made an impact in the world.
Would I recommend this book? Not really but everyone has to choose for themselves.
March 22, 2017
The death of Micheal Jackson is one of those "where were you when you heard" moments. For those of us who grew up with his music, first the Jackson Five and then as an ever evolving solo act, he was the soundtrack of our lives. Before You Judge Me by Tavis Smiley does a very good job filling in many of the blanks and mysteries that surrounded the superstar. What was his childhood really like? Why did he marry who he did? Was there any truth to the allegations that surrounded him? What was the deal behind that oxygen chamber....? Through Smiley's well researched book, we come to understand the stress the singer was under for most of his life as he was constantly pulled between worlds. The portrait is a sympathetic one that leaves us feeling his death was even more tragic. In the end, his struggles peeked into the chronic insomnia that led him to rely on the poorly administered medications that took his life. To this day, I cannot hear a Michael Jackson song without wanting to dance and sing along. Each song carries with it a surge of happy memories. I only wish the creator of all that happiness could have continued making us all smile and move or, at least, that he could have rested at peace knowing what joy he brought.
Thank you to Little, Brown and Company and Tavis Smiley for providing a copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.
Thank you to Little, Brown and Company and Tavis Smiley for providing a copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.
November 17, 2023
I was pleasantly surprised by the way Smiley framed the early days of 'This Is It' in the opening chapter. I was honestly expecting a dreary retelling of Michael's "Swift and Sudden Fall From Grace", but Smiley put that moment in time into the most beautiful perspective that I’ve ever heard. It made me eager and excited to dive into the rest of the book, and boy, am I glad that I did. I've been a hardcore MJ fan since childhood who thought I had an extensive knowledge of all things Michael until reading this book.
I'm going to make a bold declaration here: this one should be required reading for anyone who enjoys reading about Michael Jackson, the man. This one is right up there with Shana's book or Frank's book. Most of us know that those last years are shrouded in mystery. So, if you're curious to know what was going on behind the scenes during that time, give this book a go. Yes, his bodyguards also gave us a glimpse into this time period, but that was just a 'glimpse' - Smiley gives us the full scope.
I'm going to make a bold declaration here: this one should be required reading for anyone who enjoys reading about Michael Jackson, the man. This one is right up there with Shana's book or Frank's book. Most of us know that those last years are shrouded in mystery. So, if you're curious to know what was going on behind the scenes during that time, give this book a go. Yes, his bodyguards also gave us a glimpse into this time period, but that was just a 'glimpse' - Smiley gives us the full scope.
March 4, 2019
The book I am reading is Michael Jackson before you judge me. A powerful chronicle of the sixteen weeks leading up to King of Pop Michael Jackson's death. Michael Jackson's final months were like the rest of his life that he could remember. filled with ups and down. Wants his privacy, and the pressure and fame that made him socially fragile and almost ultimately unable to live. He still made it through to try to make his fans happy but still made them sad when he died. But i bet if he did not die. He would still have had the concert still would have seen his kids grow up more and died with a happy legacy and been happy to see his kids one last time before he died. I would recommend this book to people who want to know the truth about Michael or his last days.
May 24, 2023
I think we have figured out that Michael was unable to grow up & face life as an adult. Many people have suffered horrible childhoods. Usually they are scarred & struggle through life. Some repeat the same scenario with the next generation, while others work hard to make a better life for their families & themselves.
Michael was so incredibly talented & able to earn so much $$$ that it blew his life all out of proportion. His self pity party warped his perspective & he never healed.
This book went around & around in circles. Michael was manipulated by his family & anyone that had $ to gain from him. He in turn manipulated “doctors” to provide drugs & surgeries.
Poorly written, this was nothing more than a tabloid regurgitation, embellished by what the author presumed went on.
Michael was so incredibly talented & able to earn so much $$$ that it blew his life all out of proportion. His self pity party warped his perspective & he never healed.
This book went around & around in circles. Michael was manipulated by his family & anyone that had $ to gain from him. He in turn manipulated “doctors” to provide drugs & surgeries.
Poorly written, this was nothing more than a tabloid regurgitation, embellished by what the author presumed went on.
April 14, 2019
A very frustrating read and nothing for huge Michael Jackson fans. It mixes some facts with misleading information, speculations and falsities. The style of writing is as exciting as a university dissertation. The story of Michael's last few days are mixed with pure speculations of what Michael is doing, thinking and feeling in his private movements, boring song analysises and unnecessary historical flashbacks. Claiming that "Leave me alone" is self-mocking is to deliberatly miss the point of both the song and the video and shows that the author doesn't fully understand Michael. MJFam, spare yourself the frustration of reading this book!
June 9, 2017
Tavis' work focus on the last 16 weeks of Michael's life. It is a tragic story of an aging King of Pop who is building a comeback through hard work and passion fueled by emotions and an unstable mix of drugs striving to keep the pain at bay while supporting a level of performance that totally consumed him. It is a story of brilliance, creativity, innocence, struggling fatherhood, search for meaning in life, over indulgence, and all consuming daemons.
August 30, 2019
Blessing and curse to be talented. I hate that family can be that way, many families does this his family was no different,use the member of the family they feel has money to take care of them.
I understood his love for his mother but she too played a role in his demise.
I understand insomnia and what goes along with it. This book made me too see him as a human and not this untouchable guy that I looked up to when I was younger.
I understood his love for his mother but she too played a role in his demise.
I understand insomnia and what goes along with it. This book made me too see him as a human and not this untouchable guy that I looked up to when I was younger.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
August 7, 2023
I had to abandon this one be ause I could not wrap my head around all the 'Michael was feeling. . . ', and 'Michael worried. . . ' How did this author know what was inside a dead man's head. There is no explanation, as far as I can find, for how the author got the information shared in this book. He just tells the stories as if he were sitting in Michael's shoulder watching it all unfold.
It seems another version of exploitation.
It seems another version of exploitation.
May 10, 2017
Heartbreaking and intimately detailed interpretation of Michael Jackson's last weeks alive. From interviews, articles, and personal experience Travis Smilely weaves together an account of a man struggling with severe anxiety, body dysmorphia and a chronic sleep disorder. Michael Jackson was an amazingly talented person who suffered greatly to share it with the world. RIP.
April 16, 2019
I checked this audiobook out at the library- I just recently watched the hbo show on mj- leaving Netherland, and decided to listen to this book. I still don’t believe he was a good guy, but as an artist he certainly is one of the best. Such a sad way to die so early- but that’s what drugs mixed with fame/money can do. The doctors should have known better.
January 19, 2024
This type of books give a slight insight into the life of the artist. One is unable to understand what the person has gone through all their life. What brought them to that actual moment and their true feelings. This was quite interesting listening to part of his story but also seeing how much people do anything for money and others for charity.
June 14, 2018
Written in stream of consciousness as he is supposed to be preparing for his shows. Instead he gets medical treatments, goes shopping, and plays with his children. Mentions many people he used to know in flashback. Many want to get close to him for $. Surreal. RIP!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 78 reviews