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275 pages, Hardcover
First published November 15, 2016
But here's the thing about crazy: It. Wants. Out.I love it.
Maybe we all have impostor syndrome and perpetually feel like our real life is right around the corner.to:
'Oh my god, I just made out with Legolas!' Again, I’m not going to name that actor, as I wish to respect his privacyevery few pages and it really worked well. I would've expected such variation to come across as seeming wild and scattered, but honestly, I adored it.
I love rules and I love following them, unless that rule is stupid.One moment she's waxing poetic about singing in her first stage play and the next she's making out with boys. (though...I could've done with a bit less boys and a bit more introspective reflections/quirky jokes.)
"Some bitter boys reading this might accuse me of "friend-zoning," but I'd like to say that even if a girl has misinterpreted a situation that someone else thinks was obvious, she does not owe her male friends anything."
"I think I need to become perfect all at once, so I keep getting overwhelmed and putting it off. I can't remember the last time that I didn't have something hanging over my head. There are usually about thirty to eighty things. Is that normal? Don't tell me. If it's not, I'm a jerk. If it is, that's super-depressing, and I know I'll just use 'this is normal' as an excuse to procrastinate even more."
" Good is not nice, polite, well-mannered, self-righteous, or naive, though good characters may be some of these things - The Book of Exalted Deeds. "
“I gave up on being Nice. I started putting more value on other qualities instead: passion, bravery, intelligence, practicality, humor, patience, fairness, and sensitivity. Those last three might seem like they are covered by "nice," but make no mistake, they are not. A person who smiles a lot and remembers everyone's birthday can turn out to be undercover crazy, a compulsive thief, and boring to boot. I don't put a lot of stock in nice. I'd prefer to be around people who have any of the above qualities over "niceness," and I'd prefer it if that applied to me, too."
"Whatever you're told to be a nice person? Maybe. Do you need to do whatever you're told to be a good person? Of course not! Man, woman, personal, professional—some people have a skill for persuading you the best thing you can be is obedient."
“Having to fight for the thing you want doesn't mean you deserve it any less.”
“With every birthday, I have stupidly expected to feel different only to discover that I'm still me: tragically lazy and childish.”
“Alas, I've tried to be honest, because honesty makes me feel less alone.”
"Sure, it will be hard, but all you need to be a writer is perseverance, a low-level alcohol dependency, and a questionable moral compass."
"Couples, singles, gay, straight, cats, dogs, and well-trained lizards are welcome. No babies."
"This was inspired by my pediatrician, a relatively young man whom I called Dr. Handsome. I had assumed this was because his name was Dr. Hasen or Dr. Branson, but I recently found out his name was Dr. Ritger, so I guess I should have just died at age four when I decided to call my physician Dr. Handsome without so much as a pun to justify it."
Baking is a really fun way to get people to like you. Being a good listener, a lively conversationalist, a loyal friend... it takes so much energy. Spend a couple of hours alone in your kitchen and get the same effects? Sign me UP!
When I was in the throes of my baking phase, my oven broke, and luckily different friends were happy to host me for a few hours, and let me fill their apartments with the smell of cinnamon, while I refused to let them help, because YOU DON'T KNOW THE SYSTEM!
This meant I would sometimes spend hours in someone else's home, experimenting, cursing and emerging from the kitchen looking like I'd fought off a rabid cat. But my hazelnut tart would be shiny and beautiful, and I would pawn it off on someone who hadn't seen behind the curtain and would praise me as a culinary genius.