Excuse Me While I Slip into Someone More Comfortable

by Eric Poole

*Starred Kirkus Review * In the great tradition of David Sedaris, David Rakoff, and Augusten Burroughs, memoirist Eric Poole recounts his quirky childhood years in utterly hilarious and painful detail.

In 1977, Eric Poole is a talented high school trumpet player with one working ear, the height-to-weight ratio of a hat rack, a series of annoyingly handsome bullies, and a mother irrationally devoted to Lemon Pledge. But who he wants to be is a star…ANY star. With equal parts imagination, flair, and delusion, Eric proceeds to emulate a series of his favorite celebrities, like Barry Manilow, Halston, Tommy Tune, and Shirley MacLaine, in an effort to become the man he’s meant to be—that is, anyone but himself.

As he moves through his late teens and early twenties in suburban St. Louis, he casts about for an appropriate outlet for his talents. Will he be a trumpet soloist? A triple-threat actor/singer/dancer? A fashion designer in gritty New York City?

Striving to become the son who can finally make his parents proud, Eric begins to suspect that discovering his personal and creative identities can only be accomplished by admitting who he really is. Picking up at the end of his first acclaimed memoir, Where’s My Wand?, Poole’s journey from self-delusion to acceptance is simultaneously hysterical, heartfelt, and inspiring.

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction, LGBT, Humor

275 pages, Hardcover

Published May 15, 2018

About the author

Eric Poole’s first memoir was rated 4 stars by People Magazine, featured on The Today Show and was developed as a television series for ABC.

He has written for the Huffington Post, CNN, and The Advocate, among others, and spends more time than he would like penning commercials for everything from McRibs to tampons to TV shows about celebrities boxing.

He lives in Southern California with his partner of 16 years. This is his second memoir.

Visit www.ericpoole.net for more information.

Reviews

[Frank Orozco · Rating 5 out of 5]

My best friend recommended that I read Eric Poole’s first memoir- “Where’s My Wand?”- and I enjoyed his stories about growing up in the St. Louis area and feeling “different.” He filled his first memoir with humorous stories about his early (and naïve) ambitions and his colorful family.
I approached his new collection- “Excuse Me While I Slip Into Someone More Comfortable”- expecting further tales of St. Louis and more about his family. (I was especially looking forward to anything involving his mother.) I am pleased to say that I came away with much more.

The writing in the new memoir has matured. A layer of deep, honest seriousness now permeates his humorous writing style. As he recounts being a closeted, naïve teenager, and eventually a young adult trying to emerge, his words are tinged with a beautiful melancholy. I found myself less impressed with his ability to write something humorous (which he does exceedingly well) and far more enraptured by the internal machinations of what was going on in his mind. I was moved several times while reading, and the final two pages of the memoir hit me with a wallop I did not expect.

In addition to the added maturity, it feels like his writing, in general, has blossomed. In one passage, he describes starring in a local production of a stage musical and struggling with his inability to “act.” With a little help from a friend and a lot of desperation, he uses sense memory to recall a childhood memory and he nails the role. The writing here is thrilling- he simultaneously describes the intense stage spotlights and the childhood experience - and both are vivid and exciting.

I highly recommend this book.

[Grady · Rating 5 out of 5]

‘Why have you been trying to be someone you’re not?’

California author Eric Poole opened some much needed doors with his first memoir WHERE’S MY WAND: ON BOY’S MAGICAL ALIENATION AND SHAG CARPETING and he continues that path with an extension of his memoir EXCUSE ME WHILE I SLIP INTO SOMEONE MORE COMFORTABLE. Eric has written for the Huffington Post, CNN, and The Advocate, and spends more time than he would like penning commercials for everything from McRibs to tampons to TV shows about celebrities boxing. He lives in Southern California with his partner of 16 years.

There are, thankfully, an increasing number of books about ‘coming out’ – accepting the gay inner person as a complete being and not hiding in the shadows of raised eyebrows. We are opening hearts and minds to the LGBTQ members of society and the result is a welcome mat into stage, screen and television series.

Eric Poole takes this journey in a different way. No morose moments of self-loathing here – just a celebration of coming to grips with the real Eric Poole. Hw is first and foremost a tremendously talented humorist, able to make the most uncanny situations bubble with humor. But at the same time Eric’s journey from St. Louis to Hollywood is a family drama executed with a terrific tongue in cheek humor that he retains until the end of his book.

The synopsis does the plot outline justice – ‘In 1977, Eric Poole is a talented high school trumpet player with one working ear, the height-to-weight ratio of a hat rack, a series of annoyingly handsome bullies, and a mother irrationally devoted to Lemon Pledge. But who he wants to be is a star…ANY star. With equal parts imagination, flair, and delusion, Eric proceeds to emulate a series of his favorite celebrities, like Barry Manilow, Halston, Tommy Tune, and Shirley MacLaine, in an effort to become the man he’s meant to be—that is, anyone but himself. As he moves through his late teens and early twenties in suburban St. Louis, he casts about for an appropriate outlet for his talents. Will he be a trumpet soloist? A triple-threat actor/singer/dancer? A fashion designer in gritty New York City? Striving to become the son who can finally make his parents proud, Eric begins to suspect that discovering his personal and creative identities can only be accomplished by admitting who he really is. Picking up at the end of his first acclaimed memoir, Where’s My Wand?, Poole’s journey from self-delusion to acceptance is simultaneously hysterical, heartfelt, and inspiring.’

This is a book to delight everyone who loves fine humor and it is also a book that is so supportive that every person struggling with gender identity or acceptance will benefit from finally fitting in with a hero. Highly Recommended.

[Melissa · Rating 3 out of 5]

Entertaining enough, but the comparisons some readers have made to David Sedaris fall flat.

[Kirk Dow · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a delightful coming of age story that everyone can relate to--that awkward time as a young adult when you are trying to find your place in the modern world. And of course, Eric's "modern" world was the 70's & 80's, the time when you expressed yourself without the book of face or insta-granny. His journey is funny and endearing. He stumbles along the way, and we laugh at his naivete, root him on when finds his courage and even cry a bit when the boy becomes a man: cue up "If He Walked Into My Life." Although apologetic in its title, "Excuse Me" takes no prisoners in making you fall in love for this goofy guy!

[Jackie Rogers · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a memoir. Eric Poole writes of his life struggling to find out who he is. His writing is hilarious. Is great when one can laugh at themselves. Is a great journey as he finds friends along the way and family that supports him without knowing everything about him. Really enjoyed reading about his journey so far and hope he will continue to write of it. Thanks to Goodreads and Mr. Poole.

[Brian · Rating 3 out of 5]

The term memoir describes a book that is about someone's life. While this book definitely fits that definition, I would describe it more as a collection of anecdotes rather than someone's life story. In this "memoir" we have a series of stories about a young adult who is convinced he is a star. Some of the stories are rather amusing and some fell a bit flat for me. One thing I want to note that has bothered me about memoirs as a whole is the use of dialogue. In this novel, there is a LOT of it, and I know that the author has to "recreate" some of the conversations but I wonder at what point does this book stop being a memoir and start becoming fiction since no one can possibly remember word for word a chat with someone many many years ago.

[ash · Rating 4 out of 5]

I've never really been a non-fiction or memoir sort of person, but oh my goodness. This book is perfect for someone trying to transition from works of fiction to real life. Charmingly funny and heart-wrenchingly real, you take a break from your own life as you read the pages of someone else's. Subtle (and not-so-subtle) hints from the very start regarding the author add up to a beautifully confident arc of development, and as you read, you feel as if you've developed along with him. I recommend this to anyone who struggles with accepting their identity, life, situation, and faith, or just anyone who's in for a light but riveting read.

[Senka · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’m embarrassed to say that I didn’t realize this was a memoir until I was halfway through. And, hilariously enough, I thought it was a little too out there to be believable (ha!). I enjoyed it, though I would’ve loved to dig deeper into Eric’s feelings during this time of his life. Laughed out loud several times, but I wish he’d delved more into his pain.

[Paul Reitz · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a rare pleasure to be able to go back and travel life's journey with Eric and experience all of the trials, disappointments and successes that made him the man he is today. I found myself constantly routing for the underdog who never quite realized he was the underdog!
With each reinvention and subsequent realization that this was not who is was supposed to be, his desired and unquestionable destiny of fame and fortune never wained.
An added bonus was being from St. Louis myself and having experienced the same rites of passage that growing up in the midwest commanded and the same dreams of escape to the big city!
The ending had me in tears of happiness.
A joyous and comedic adventure~

[Kelly Funk · Rating 3 out of 5]

(I won a Kindle copy of this through Goodreads.) I'm still not entirely sure how I felt about this book. Overall, I liked the coming of age story, but there were a lot of cringeworthy moments. Especially in the way he would treat his friends/girlfriends at times.

[Mediaman · Rating 1 out of 5]

This is another fake gay memoir that pretends to rage against the author's Christian upbringing and homophobic society by painting others in a bad light through stories that are just plain impossible to believe. About half the book is done in quotations from the 1970s and 1980s, which means it's virtually impossible to be accurate or true since none of it was recorded at the time. The author is just making stuff up, uses clever phrases and wording from the 1990s that he incorrectly places 10 or 20 years earlier, and punchline endings to neatly tie up every story. Nothing is believable.

The irony is that he claims in the book that after years of being heterosexual and not even giving a thought to being gay, he changes overnight into a gay bar-hopping, bed-jumping stereotype, writing: "Suddenly, it seemed as though God had led me to this decision; that, even more than being straight, more than being my father, he wanted me to be honest. That projecting my truth out into the world was the only way to discover who I truly, authentically was." (p. 173)

Based on that alone he has failed in this book. As an advertising copywriter he knows how to create something fake and make it look real. His job is to sell people through dishonesty and subterfuge. This book is just another example of that. Not an honest moment in it. And he admits it up front, saying that in addition to there being name changes some of the characters "are composites to save having to introduce you to the countless number of people who flow in and out of one's life." Huh? AND he says he changed "details of events" in order to tell the stories! Namely--you can't believe one thing in this book.

For those who claim it was a hilarious read, I didn't smile once. It's more sad than funny, incredibly shallow. He doesn't develop any story or claimed friendship. Once he starts living his gay lifestyle those he befriends have so little detail that he skips complete logic. At least he could have added some of the details of his sex life but that is completely absent! It all seems like a bad TV show pilot script where he thinks he's funny but this audience isn't laughing. There's no self-discovery or feeling of being "comfortable" here--just a bad reminder of how fake memoirs continue to be published as long as they include a short note saying the author has changed everything. The mostly five-star reviews show just how gullible readers are, lacking critical thinking skills to challenge a writer who confesses to lying on the first page.

[Kevin · Rating 4 out of 5]

In Eric Poole's first memoir, 2010's "Where's My Wand?", he chronicled his pre-teen years, during which he escaped daily bullying and a neat-freak mother by secretly pretending to be Endora from "Bewitched." Poole's lighthearted and charming second memoir, "Excuse Me While I Slip into Someone More Comfortable", picks up in the late 1970s, when the high schooler begins to suspect he might be gay. His coping strategies remain as dubious as in the first book--he plans to make himself cool by emulating the fashion style of his idea of a babe-magnet, Barry Manilow.

His initial sexual encounters with a girl are hilarious. His first time, he throws up on her. Later, opting for a more romantic atmosphere, he sets the stage with the soundtrack to Barbra Streisand's A Star Is Born cued up on his cassette tape recorder. Trying to figure out how to use a condom, he asks his date, "Well, do I just put it on the top like a beret?" Post-high school, he works at a travel agency. His snarky and inappropriate e-mails to coworkers ("Your body is like a children's playground--sticky, full of germs, and frequented by perverts") don't get him fired, they get him a humor column in the agency's monthly newsletter. Equally funny are his misadventures working at an ad agency and his stumbling attempts to find his way out of the closet.

Poole's acerbic but goodhearted tale of navigating that difficult period between living at home with parents and entering the adult world is a refreshing and inspiring read.

Eric Poole's hilariously snarky but goodhearted second memoir covers his gay sexual awakening and move from his over-protective family home to adulthood.

[Matt Bell · Rating 5 out of 5]

Funny, absorbing, and ultimately very moving, Eric Poole’s new memoir "Excuse Me While I Slip into Someone More Comfortable" relates a series of pivotal episodes from the author’s young adulthood that gradually reveal a character worth cheering for. Enamored with the pop-cultural stars of his teens and twenties, young Eric yearns for a special identity of his own that will transport him from the mundane Middle America that he knows to some more celestial sphere. As he works to emulate the likes of Barry Manilow, Halston, Tommy Tune, and Shirley MacLaine, the gaps between who he is and who he aspires to be appear in ways that make the reader laugh, cringe, and sympathize. He’s fearless in describing early romantic experiments and failures as he reckons with his unruly sexuality, and, more subtly, he masterfully develops the story of this young man whose characteristic diffidence and self-consciousness slowly give way to a personality more self-assured and clear-sighted. What is most beguiling is that, by recounting his desperate attempts to become someone else, Poole shows us that he has at last achieved an identity—a writer’s voice—that is his alone. What a joy it is to take this journey with him.

[Todd · Rating 5 out of 5]

I had all of the emotions you can imagine while reading this book. I did cry (and it wasn't pretty since I was on a plane). I did laugh (out loud a few times). I smiled. I felt sympathy, empathy ... joy. It's probably because I'm close in age to Mr. Poole and my Southern Baptist upbringing was so close to his. And I was in the band just as he was. And I was trying to figure out who I was in the 70s, too. In short, I completely identify with this book (and its predecessor, too). But even if you weren't coming of age in the 70s, you'll enjoy this read. Mr. Poole's humor - sometimes self-deprecating - is always on-point, and through his humor we understand what it was like for him growing up in the Midwest (or upper South to some). The stories are rich, poignant, sensitive, boisterous, funny, and so, so real. I feel like I personally know the characters. I could go on and on. Just read it.

[Michelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excuse Me While I slip Into Someone More Comfortable is as funny as the title suggests. This is a hilarious memoir that takes us through Eric Poole's journey to find himself. But in all the humor, the hope, the confusion, and the struggles are never lost. I found myself rooting for the author as he navigated high school, experienced college, accepted his sexuality, and searched for success with his talent for humor in his toolbox. The humor enhances but never overshadows the emotions of the journey.

This is Poole's second memoir, and I am crossing my fingers that he will write a third And a fourth, fifth...). As a fan of Erma Bombeck, I feel that Eric Poole has surpassed his desire to be a Boy Bombeck. Read Where's My Wand and Excuse Me While I Slip Into Someone More Comfortable. I highly recommend both.

[Sharon L. Popp · Rating 5 out of 5]

I won a Kindle edition of this book through the Goodreads contest that I had entered. I didn't have a clear idea of what the book was about, but had submitted my entry based on the title of the book - it grabbed my attention. The book itself held my attention. I truly enjoyed this book, on so many levels. It was funny in many parts, where I would laugh out loud and my husband would ask "What? What happened?" I was also drawn in emotionally, and could feel the pain of being "different", and the struggle to be "special". The fact that Eric has self doubt, but keeps on persevering is what I love the most. I was rooting for him to go for it at the end of the book! (And as soon as I finished this book, I went on Amazon and bought his previous book.)

[Brenda · Rating 4 out of 5]

I did not know who Eric Poole was, but this was a giveaway book from Goodreads. Since I am reading biographies more, I gave it a shot. Overall it was quite an interesting read. The struggles of growing up, trying to find your defining moment that starts your life, is real. I enjoyed his writing, and his story. It was worth the time, especially if you grew up in the time period, when the freedom to freely be you wasn't always an option.

[Jane · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was fine. It was easy enough to read. It is not comprable to David Sedaris’s books as some have said. I think it might be that the author and I just don’t have the same sense of humor. And maybe there were too many superfluous metaphors for me. I only give 2 stars to memoirs when I feel the author was not being honest or if they’re too defensive. He seemed sincere so I’ll keep with the 3 stars!

[Eve · Rating 2 out of 5]

A book about figuring out who you are

This book chronicled the life of a St Louis teenager as he ages, comes to terms with who he is, and figures out how the world works.
I unfortunately found him to be insufferable in his hubris, grandeur, and lack of understanding of the world around him. It was satisfying to watch him grow and become slightly more realistic at least.

[Anna Bella · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hilarious

I enjoyed this story. I understood his longing to be someone, something in this world. Leaving an imprint long after he is gone. We only have one life to live with no do overs, so why the hell not do you and be you.!

[Charles Robbins · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brilliant, witty and funny!

Eric Poole is a gifted writer who shares his trials and tribulations of becoming a young adult by introducing you to his world of quirky family, friends and relationships in a charming, amusing, and embarrassing way.

[Ron · Rating 4 out of 5]

Well-written and very enjoyable read. Chronicles Eric's transition from a teenager to a young, working adult.

Real opportunities appear quite infrequently...the key is recognizing, and then acting on them.

[Sadie · Rating 3 out of 5]

I received a copy of this book in exchange for a review.

This was enjoyable. It was a little too short for my liking, as I think I could read about this guy all day. It was well written and a fun depiction of growing up as LGBT in a very religious family.

[Unna · Rating 3 out of 5]

TBR

[Aimee · Rating 5 out of 5]

Goodreads giveaway

[Andy White · Rating 4 out of 5]

Part 2 of his life story. I enjoyed this more than his first one. A very funny, bittersweet read. I hope there is a third book in the making.

[Luca · Rating 5 out of 5]

reminded me of the Adrian Mole books

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very amusing, smart memoir that was a quick read...author is deaf in one ear and accepting himself as gay as the book continues, but book is mostly about relationships and daring to take risks.

[Fei K · Rating 4 out of 5]

Breath-catchingly funny. I loved it so much

[Rod Rogers · Rating 5 out of 5]

Yes, it’s true: I laughed and cried my way through just about every page of this book. Not sure how he pulled it off, but it's fun to read a miracle.