Women from Another Planet? Our Lives in the Universe of Autism

by Jean Kearns Miller

Mention the word autism and the room suddenly turns silent. It’s the dreaded A word.

People’s attention turns to late night TV public service ads declaring that autistic children are “imprisoned” by autism and need curing at all cost. Recent autobiographies have helped dispel this dire description by suggesting that autism is not a prison and that the door is unlocked and you’re free to come in. Women from Another Planet? moves beyond these autistic life stories in important ways. It’s a collection of stories and conversations, all of them by women on the autism spectrum who speak candidly, insightfully, and often engagingly about both their gender in terms of their autism and their autism in terms of their gender. It is written not just for parents and professionals, like the other works, but also to those women still searching for ways to understand the unnamed difference they live with, as well as the wider audience of discerning readers. If you enter the unlocked door of these Women from Another Planet? you may end up with a question mark or two about your planet. Is normalcy really all it’s cracked up to be?

Genres: Autistic Spectrum Disorder, Nonfiction, Womens, Health, Psychology, Memoir, Biography

326 pages, Paperback

First published September 2, 2003

Reviews

[Eve · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is one of the better books I've read of first hand accounts of being autistic. I note that some other reviewers found this book hard to read. It's funny that as an autistic person I found it super easy to read, and loved the format. I enjoyed the conversational section which I recognised as a series of proper, thorough autistic conversations. I enjoyed the way that the book moved between different styles of writing - it broken the pace in a very nice way. I liked that there was a page gap between the entries, it helps me to feel a sense of space and processing. I made so many marks in the book to go back to. Every single entry had something in it that I related to. I didn't relate so much to those who reported difficulty responding to feelings, but I think that sometimes this is just about clarity and honesty i.e. autistic people are more honest about not being able to read minds whereas non-autistic people think they can and pretend they can, even if they are getting it completely wrong. Wanted to give this more of a review before I forget, but am too tired to say more now.

[Lindsay · Rating 3 out of 5]

This eclectic anthology of writings by autistic women about their experiences grew out of an email list the women had formed. The first chapter (which is much longer than any of the other pieces) is actually a discussion between several of the women on the list (most of whom have multiple short pieces included in the book) about some of the topics they're writing on. I think that chapter is a good indication of the whole book's collective spirit --- it's not particularly unified, in either tone, content or style, to allow each contributing author maximal freedom to decide what she wanted to express. As such, this is a book you can read one short piece from and then put aside; since what little continuity does exist is (broadly) thematic rather than plot- or argument-based, you don't need to recall other pieces in any great detail --- or, indeed, to read them in order.

[Sarah]

I am going to put this one on hold. I've read some of it, but it's taking me so long to get through it. It's written by women with autism and asperger's which makes it kind of difficult to read. I need an autism "break" from the books. Hope to finish it soon:)

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

First of all, I love that a book was written this way: collaboratively in an online discussion. Some of the women contributed poems and essays as well, but the highlight is really the interactive sections. People not on the Autistic spectrum may find the writing difficult or tedious, but for someone (like me) who shares some of these characteristics, it's quite an enlightening read.

[Rachel · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fabulous read. A must for women suspecting they are on the spectrum.

1 star review is definitely by someone who is neurotypical, haha

[Sharon C. Robideaux · Rating 4 out of 5]

More facts needed

One of the reasons I enjoy Temple Grandin's writing about autism is her focus on the physicality of the brain. When given an image of the brain of a person who has autism next to the image of a so-called neurotypical, I can see why these brains might function differently. In contrast, reading people's personal stories about social experiences convinces me of very little. By now I have read dozens of personal accounts. All the writers have the jargon down pat, and their stories seem similar, as if they'd all worked from the same script. What I want more of is the process of diagnosis, the information provided by the medical field. If I wanted to learn about a diagnosis of cancer or heart disease, facts would be in plentiful supply. I would not be satisfied by the personal stories of people who have often self-diagnosed.

[Jeni · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book might be great but I didn't enjoy it as much as I thought I would. I understand what they were trying to do I just don't think it was as effective as they might have thought, at least not for me. I like very structured reading which is probably why i prefer more technical books for this subject.. i liked a few accounts on their own but as a whole i thought it lacked something. Being on the spectrum myself i thought it would be a constant feeling of connectedness that i often find while reading other books about the Autism spectrum. But since these women ranged so much on the spectrum from mild to severe I was constantly yanked back and forth from a feeling of connection to total confusion thinking "I don't feel that way at all" and then the next person spoke and I would wonder how they were considered on the spectrum when they were a lot more NT than myself. I had to constantly remind myself that the ladies varied greatly but they never really said how or who was high functioning or aspergers or autistic or a "cousin"... they just lumped this HUGE group into 1 book.. but there are so many differences within the group..

The book started out in one style and then completely changed.. didn't like that at all. In the beginning it was a little strange how they were discussing how they wrote the book and how it should be written but it was sort of interesting to see behind the scenes and it moved chronologically which i liked. And the fact that they shared actual online conversations was interesting because i related to how they were better in written format than in person, like myself. But then it just jumped right into personal accounts. and the clear path I'd been following was suddenly scattered in several directions.

And some things they seemed to feel as a whole upset me. Things that i do not feel should be the voice of all women on the spectrum. The topic of being alone and how they feel about it came up a lot and while I would rather be alone a lot of the time, or even most of the time, there are times I yearn to be with others.. i just don't know how. I have a hard time making friends but a harder time keeping them. not for lack of trying or wanting. wanting to be around people doesn't mean it is easy or i "like" it, its just an instinct inside me that wants to be fulfilled, especially as I get older. Even if I don't have the motivation to fulfill it and no one knows its there, it is there. In this book they all seemed to hate people and not want anything to do with anyone and not care that they felt that way and that's fine for some but i think a lot of people with ASD are actually very lonely and want friends and to be around others. I agree that most NT people upset me some way or another with their mindless self indulgence but i do like some and those are the type of people i wish i was surrounded by once in a while. I don't like having lots of friends but everyone wants 1 or 2 close friends. I currently have no friends (besides my husband) and wish i did. These women can say they want to be alone but to imply that's how we all feel is ridiculous. I suspect for some its more self preservation - I've been there many times. Cannot seem to make friends hard as I try so I start saying I don't want them. don't need them. people suck. It isn't true. its just easier to tell myself. I'm not saying we all feel this way either but it would have been nice to see different perspectives on the topic.

overall it was okay.

[Mintti · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book contains stories of women with some condition of autistic spectrum, autism or asperger. The first part was a bit heavy to read, it was mostly discussion between these women who wrote this book from their e-mails. The second part was more interesting, a dive into their lives and how they experience life and its phenomenons. How they learn very differently and how they cope with everyday stuff. I've always been very interested in autism and read lots about it. This was a good addition.

[D. · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very good read for families, friends and women on the spectrum. The first section is a bit disjointed as it is transcripts from an online support list. If you can get past that, the information and insight shared by the editors is a beautiful and moving insight into the lives of adult women with autism.

[Prudence · Rating 3 out of 5]

The beginning is somewhat boring, but once it gets to the personal writings of each contributor it gets really good.

[Judy Singer · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wrote the preface for this one

[Debbie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lovely collection of writing (prose and poetry) from women with aspergers. The sort of book I enjoy coming back to again and again.

[S.J. · Rating 4 out of 5]

A good and informative book. Parts of it feel a bit dated (especially referring to female gender roles)