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The Truth About Aaron: My Journey to Understand My Brother
5 Hours and 16 Minutes
The unvarnished true story of the tragic life and death of Aaron Hernandez, the college All-American and New England Patriots star convicted of murder, told by one of the few people who knew him best, his brother.
To football fans, Aaron Hernandez was a superstar in the making. A standout at the University of Florida, he helped the Gators win the national title in 2008. Drafted by the New England Patriots, in his second full season with the team, he and fellow Patriots' tight end Rob Gronkowski set records for touchdowns and yardage, and, with Tom Brady, led New England to Super Bowl XLVI in 2012. But Aaron's NFL career ended as quickly as it began. On June 26, 2013, he was arrested at his North Attleboro home, charged with the murder of Odin Lloyd, and released by the Patriots. Convicted of first-degree murder, Aaron was sentenced to life in prison without parole. On May 15, 2014, while on trial for Lloyd's murder, Aaron was indicted for two more murders. Five days after being acquitted for those double murders, he committed suicide in his jail cell. Aaron Hernandez was twenty-seven years old.
In this clear-eyed, emotionally devastating biography-a family memoir combining football and true crime-Jonathan (formerly known by his nickname DJ) Hernandez speaks out fully for the first time about the brother he knew. Jonathan draws on his own recollections as well as thousands of pages of prison letters and other sources to give us a full portrait of a star athlete and troubled young man who would become a murderer, and the darkness that consumed him. Jonathan does not portray Aaron as a victim; he does not lay the blame for his crimes on his illness. He speaks openly about Aaron's talent, his sexuality, his crimes and incarceration, and the CTE that ravaged him-scientists found that upon his death, Aaron had the brain of a sixty-seven-year old suffering from the same condition. Filled with headline-making revelations, The Truth About Aaron is a shocking and moving account of promise, tragedy, and loss-of one man's descent into rage and violence, as told by the person who knew him more closely than anyone else.
The unvarnished true story of the tragic life and death of Aaron Hernandez, the college All-American and New England Patriots star convicted of murder, told by one of the few people who knew him best, his brother.
To football fans, Aaron Hernandez was a superstar in the making. A standout at the University of Florida, he helped the Gators win the national title in 2008. Drafted by the New England Patriots, in his second full season with the team, he and fellow Patriots' tight end Rob Gronkowski set records for touchdowns and yardage, and, with Tom Brady, led New England to Super Bowl XLVI in 2012. But Aaron's NFL career ended as quickly as it began. On June 26, 2013, he was arrested at his North Attleboro home, charged with the murder of Odin Lloyd, and released by the Patriots. Convicted of first-degree murder, Aaron was sentenced to life in prison without parole. On May 15, 2014, while on trial for Lloyd's murder, Aaron was indicted for two more murders. Five days after being acquitted for those double murders, he committed suicide in his jail cell. Aaron Hernandez was twenty-seven years old.
In this clear-eyed, emotionally devastating biography-a family memoir combining football and true crime-Jonathan (formerly known by his nickname DJ) Hernandez speaks out fully for the first time about the brother he knew. Jonathan draws on his own recollections as well as thousands of pages of prison letters and other sources to give us a full portrait of a star athlete and troubled young man who would become a murderer, and the darkness that consumed him. Jonathan does not portray Aaron as a victim; he does not lay the blame for his crimes on his illness. He speaks openly about Aaron's talent, his sexuality, his crimes and incarceration, and the CTE that ravaged him-scientists found that upon his death, Aaron had the brain of a sixty-seven-year old suffering from the same condition. Filled with headline-making revelations, The Truth About Aaron is a shocking and moving account of promise, tragedy, and loss-of one man's descent into rage and violence, as told by the person who knew him more closely than anyone else.
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First published October 30, 2018
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About the author
Jonathan Hernández
14 books8 followersJonathan Hernandez is a former University of Connecticut quarterback. He is also the brother of Aaron Hernandez, a former American football tight end with the New England Patriots who was found guilty of first-degree murder in 2015 and sentenced to serve life in prison. Aaron was later found dead in his cell, his death ruled a suicide. Jonathan quit coaching for several years, likely in search of anonymity, as he ran his own roofing business in Dallas before taking a job at Ledyard High School in Connecticut.
Librarians note: There is more than one author in the Goodreads database with this name.
Librarians note: There is more than one author in the Goodreads database with this name.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 146 reviews
November 4, 2018
Great Book
This was a great book and hard to put down. It took a lot of courage for Jonathan Hernandez to write. As a New England Patriots fan who followed the Aaron Hernandez story it answered a lot of questions. Except one now that it is known the babysitter sexually molested Aaron was he confronted? Has he been reported to the police? In hopes he never hurts another child.
This was a great book and hard to put down. It took a lot of courage for Jonathan Hernandez to write. As a New England Patriots fan who followed the Aaron Hernandez story it answered a lot of questions. Except one now that it is known the babysitter sexually molested Aaron was he confronted? Has he been reported to the police? In hopes he never hurts another child.
March 25, 2019
This book was more intimate than the other books written about Aaron Hernandez. I felt that it made him more relatable, more human, as opposed to this giant celebrity. The author did not pretend to know if he was guilty of not and the book was not biased by that at all. It was simply his experience with his brother. Aaron's truth. That's what I loved the most.
December 13, 2018
A truly heartbreaking account of an older brother trying to grieve and understand his younger brother’s internal demons, downward spiral, and terrible fate. This book stirs a lot of emotions.
If you have someone close to you who is troubled (and can do nothing about it), you can truly empathize with Jonathan.
A quick and light read.
If you have someone close to you who is troubled (and can do nothing about it), you can truly empathize with Jonathan.
A quick and light read.
July 8, 2019
Now this book has brought into light the real story! The story of Aaron. Which is also as important as what has happened when it comes to the crimes committed. Aaron was sick, and the story his brother has brought forth brings a lot of things to light. A lot of things that not even his wife has come to admit, Aaron’s homosexuality was one thing that shocked me in the beginning and it’s something that I couldn’t stop trying to figure out until now. His fiancé didn’t admit to it but of course she wouldn’t, no woman will, but the fact that Aaron has told his brother to tell his story, the real story, now I can or a lot of thing to rest. Specialist have spoken to DJ, and told him what CTE can do to a person especially with the blows to the head since he has been playing football at a very young age. The specialist also tells DJ about how Aaron’s actions led him to do things and then not remember. At the end of the day his brain wasn’t ok. It’s sad how it all ended. But only god knows why things happened the way it happened. I’m hoping that the family is at peace.
January 24, 2020
I'm not going to give this book a typical review. Instead let me applaud Jonathan for being brave enough to put himself out there like this. I've read other articles and other books about Aaron. I've seen every show possible. At Gillette I sat 4 rows up on the 20th yard line for the 3 seasons Aaron played for the Patriots--the other day I had a Facebook memory that came up....it said "Aaron's having a good game." Aaron's story has always tugged at me for some reason. This book was different, though. This was personal. Jonathan, thank you for sharing a piece of your brother with the rest of us. I hope that you, and Aaron, have found some peace.
February 11, 2019
My heart aches so much for Jonathan and his family, that they weren’t equipped with the emotional resources to help Aaron before it was too late. I started reading this because of my true crime intrigue, but I found the most profound parts of this memoir to be Jonathan’s memories of him and Aaron as children and those moments when he could sense something was wrong with Aaron. Those parts were so eerie. The saddest part is that now we know Aaron had severe brain damage and was dealing (or wasn’t) with trauma related to childhood sexual abuse and his repressed sexuality at the time of his death, AND Odin Lloyd’s family will likely never know who his killer really was.
December 19, 2018
This book reads like a high school paper and lacks substance and any depth. You could literally get any of the information found in this book on Wikipedia. I'm not saying that I want gory details about Aaron's life/death. What I am saying is; with such a poor dialogue, it didn't offer anything. At least give me writing that leaves me feeling like I read something worth reading.
November 13, 2018
Very quick read. Not particularly a deep read. There was so much emphasis put on how much he loved his brother, but it seemed as if he knew early on that there were a lot of problems that he didn’t bother to follow up on. It might not have changed what happened, but maybe Aaron could have had some peace if he’d had some support from his family. Sad story all the way around.
November 24, 2018
Everyone in this story --- the people Aaron Hernandez murdered, Aaron himself, and, too, his brother who "wrote" this with the "help" of supposed journalist, Lars Anderson --- acted from impulses cultivated and encouraged by a toxic cultural aggrandizement of stereotypical masculinity combined with an equally virulent worship of wealth, using both as measures of success and worthiness in the world.
Aaron was raised in a poisonous family, misogyny, homophobia, and abuse were the stuff of his youth, and he was rewarded for parroting those behaviors and beliefs, and punished for being true to who he was and how he felt.
Football is proven to be damaging unto lethal for those who play it; the NFL and football business interests from the childhood to public school to NCAA to professional level have long lied about its harmful effect on players because it personifies the same toxic tropes of heterosexual masculinity and financial achievement glorified and propagandized throughout this country.
Sadly, this book doesn't go even a millimeter beneath the surface of the story --- obviously one more after-death attempt to make money off of Aaron Hernandez, his own brother continuing the thoughtless, heedless exploitation of Aaron that began with his father, his high school coaches, his colleges, and the NFL/sports network behemoth that profits from chewing up and grinding to death athletes who, often, have few (if any) other options in life --- certainly none that reward them financially and "American-dream" wise as does the giant corporate pro-sport world. Unfortunately, these athletes are --- for the most part -- exploited, ruined, and discarded.
And because this book doesn't begin to address any of that in any sincere way, or make any effort to offer sociological insight or answers, it is just one more abuse of Aaron and for that reason, One Star, because I can't seem to give it zero stars.
Aaron was raised in a poisonous family, misogyny, homophobia, and abuse were the stuff of his youth, and he was rewarded for parroting those behaviors and beliefs, and punished for being true to who he was and how he felt.
Football is proven to be damaging unto lethal for those who play it; the NFL and football business interests from the childhood to public school to NCAA to professional level have long lied about its harmful effect on players because it personifies the same toxic tropes of heterosexual masculinity and financial achievement glorified and propagandized throughout this country.
Sadly, this book doesn't go even a millimeter beneath the surface of the story --- obviously one more after-death attempt to make money off of Aaron Hernandez, his own brother continuing the thoughtless, heedless exploitation of Aaron that began with his father, his high school coaches, his colleges, and the NFL/sports network behemoth that profits from chewing up and grinding to death athletes who, often, have few (if any) other options in life --- certainly none that reward them financially and "American-dream" wise as does the giant corporate pro-sport world. Unfortunately, these athletes are --- for the most part -- exploited, ruined, and discarded.
And because this book doesn't begin to address any of that in any sincere way, or make any effort to offer sociological insight or answers, it is just one more abuse of Aaron and for that reason, One Star, because I can't seem to give it zero stars.
December 11, 2019
3.5
This was hard to read and digest. I also question the accuracy of some of the narrative--is Hernandez really being honest about things, or is he too clouded by his love for his brother? Did A. Hernandez really come out to their mother while in prison? Was he really innocent as he claimed, or was his CTE a factor in erratic, violent, and bizarre actions? Should he have been convicted for life and put behind bars, or should he have been committed to a mental institution to be treated for his remaining time on earth? Would that have prevented his suicide? Also, their mom sucked. It was always all about her, and it was super gross, no matter the other gross trauma going on. Really depressing book, but fascinating to think about the CTE aspect and what tremendous damage was done to A. Hernandez's brain from an early age.
This was hard to read and digest. I also question the accuracy of some of the narrative--is Hernandez really being honest about things, or is he too clouded by his love for his brother? Did A. Hernandez really come out to their mother while in prison? Was he really innocent as he claimed, or was his CTE a factor in erratic, violent, and bizarre actions? Should he have been convicted for life and put behind bars, or should he have been committed to a mental institution to be treated for his remaining time on earth? Would that have prevented his suicide? Also, their mom sucked. It was always all about her, and it was super gross, no matter the other gross trauma going on. Really depressing book, but fascinating to think about the CTE aspect and what tremendous damage was done to A. Hernandez's brain from an early age.
June 19, 2025
This is an emotional memoir by DJ Hernandez, offering a brother’s perspective on the life and tragic downfall of football player Aaron Hernandez. It’s an honest attempt to come to terms with how someone so close—someone he loved and protected—ended up at the center of a shocking scandal and terrible event.
The book touches on important themes: a volatile and complicated family environment, moments of closeness between the brothers, and Aaron’s struggles with his identity and sexuality—issues that clearly caused him deep internal conflict. DJ doesn’t shy away from showing the dysfunction and the pain, but the book often feels more like a stream of memory and emotion than a structured narrative.
There are moments of genuine insight, but the story jumps around and becomes repetitive. It ends abruptly, without much reflection or resolution. While no one expects clean answers to such a complicated life, it’s hard to know what DJ wants the reader to walk away with—beyond his own unresolved grief.
This book may resonate with those already familiar with the broader Aaron Hernandez story and interested in a more intimate look. But for readers looking for deeper exploration of the issues raised—mental health, sexuality, CTE, or systemic pressures in sports—it falls a bit short. A heartfelt but quick and uneven read.
The book touches on important themes: a volatile and complicated family environment, moments of closeness between the brothers, and Aaron’s struggles with his identity and sexuality—issues that clearly caused him deep internal conflict. DJ doesn’t shy away from showing the dysfunction and the pain, but the book often feels more like a stream of memory and emotion than a structured narrative.
There are moments of genuine insight, but the story jumps around and becomes repetitive. It ends abruptly, without much reflection or resolution. While no one expects clean answers to such a complicated life, it’s hard to know what DJ wants the reader to walk away with—beyond his own unresolved grief.
This book may resonate with those already familiar with the broader Aaron Hernandez story and interested in a more intimate look. But for readers looking for deeper exploration of the issues raised—mental health, sexuality, CTE, or systemic pressures in sports—it falls a bit short. A heartfelt but quick and uneven read.
March 28, 2019
Since this is a true story, I am sensitive to all this family suffered regarding the trouble life of Aaron.
I remember seeing and hearing about this in the news and didn't quite understand it. I figured a book written by his brother would bring the truth as the title suggests, but sadly it wasn't very informative.
A lot of the chapters where about Jonathan and his career and where it took him, the failure of his first marriage and him building a new future without his brother.
The book never went into detail on why the cops suspected him and the evidence that convicted him. As for the other crime he was accused of , I had to read the page three times looking for the verdict and finally looked it up on line.
I remember seeing and hearing about this in the news and didn't quite understand it. I figured a book written by his brother would bring the truth as the title suggests, but sadly it wasn't very informative.
A lot of the chapters where about Jonathan and his career and where it took him, the failure of his first marriage and him building a new future without his brother.
The book never went into detail on why the cops suspected him and the evidence that convicted him. As for the other crime he was accused of , I had to read the page three times looking for the verdict and finally looked it up on line.
October 31, 2024
Very quick read. I wish it could’ve went into a little more depth but I understood it’s only from his brother’s perspective.
December 24, 2018
I think it was really valuable - a quick read, not light.
January 30, 2019
I first heard about this book from an Instagram post by Tyler Perry. He read it and encouraged others to do so. I was intrigued because the book combines some of my favorite subjects: football, true crime and family dynamics. This book is the life story of Aaron Hernandez told by his older brother, Johnathan a.k.a. DJ. Aaron was a NFL player convicted of murder and later died by suicide. After his death, his brain was donated to research of CTE. His brain was one the most damaged researchers have seen. In addition to CTE, Aaron experienced mental illness, abuse and sexual orientation confusion.
In the book, Jonathan seems to want to humanize Aaron who was often portrayed as a monster in the press. He accomplishes changing the narrative of his brother and showing his humanity. The simplistic and powerful language of the book peels back the layers of the media accounts and gives a personal look at Aaron Hernandez.
In the book, Jonathan seems to want to humanize Aaron who was often portrayed as a monster in the press. He accomplishes changing the narrative of his brother and showing his humanity. The simplistic and powerful language of the book peels back the layers of the media accounts and gives a personal look at Aaron Hernandez.
March 28, 2019
This was a quick read for me since I so enjoy reading true stories. Loved reading the brotherly bond between Aaron and Jonathan. The struggles they each faced throughout their lives. Also was interesting learning more about CTE- chronic traumatic encephalopathy.
December 5, 2018
This book is an emotional roller-coaster from beginning to end.
Aaron Hernandez was destroyed by the sport he loved - football. The repeated head injuries that plagued him from high through the NFL did significant damage to his brain, causing him to change as a person. But the head injuries cannot be blamed for it all. The toxic masculinity that pervaded his home life as a youth did just as much damage, if not more.
From his father asking him why he "stood like a faggot" to telling him that "there'll be no faggots in this house", it was made clear to a young Aaron that being gay was NEVER an option for him. This forced hiding of his feelings for other men made him strive to ignore that part of him and buy into the "typical" male role - get married to a woman, have kids, and provide for them. His few dalliances with men had to be well hidden and denied.
Yet, toxic masculinity struck Aaron in another way - friends. He made friends with the wrong people. These men were gang members, drug dealers, and all-around nefarious. These type of clingers, or hangers on, brought Aaron down and eventually led him to the crime for which he was convicted.
The brain injuries and the toxic masculinity and then his incarceration for murder proved too much. Aaron committed suicide in his cell, with paranoid writings everywhere, including a bible verse on his forehead, written in blood.
Aaron was able to relieve himself of some of his burden before he passed by coming out to his mom and confessing that there was a man he loved and spent time with. I am thankful for that on his behalf. However, he also disclosed that he was molested by a neighbor at a very young age.
Seeing Aaron grow up through his brother's eyes was beautiful and seeing how much love there was between them made me smile. I appreciate Jonathan's frankness and honesty in this book. He let the dark side show just as much as the light. The reader gets to really know Aaron and see him for who he was. My heart broke for him over and over again as I saw the angst and burden of his repressed sexuality brewing into anger and bad behavior and choices over and over again. The repeated head injuries only served to make it worse.
I know that Aaron was convicted of murder, and I will only say that I was obviously not at the trial, nor have I read much about it and seen the evidence. I will likely research that next. But I feel so much sorrow for Aaron- for all he could have been! For the life he could have lived! For the happiness he could have found! I mourn for who was inside of him, pushed down to the bottom so as to not be revealed.
Rest in Piece Aaron. And thank you to Jonathan for sharing this story.
Aaron Hernandez was destroyed by the sport he loved - football. The repeated head injuries that plagued him from high through the NFL did significant damage to his brain, causing him to change as a person. But the head injuries cannot be blamed for it all. The toxic masculinity that pervaded his home life as a youth did just as much damage, if not more.
From his father asking him why he "stood like a faggot" to telling him that "there'll be no faggots in this house", it was made clear to a young Aaron that being gay was NEVER an option for him. This forced hiding of his feelings for other men made him strive to ignore that part of him and buy into the "typical" male role - get married to a woman, have kids, and provide for them. His few dalliances with men had to be well hidden and denied.
Yet, toxic masculinity struck Aaron in another way - friends. He made friends with the wrong people. These men were gang members, drug dealers, and all-around nefarious. These type of clingers, or hangers on, brought Aaron down and eventually led him to the crime for which he was convicted.
The brain injuries and the toxic masculinity and then his incarceration for murder proved too much. Aaron committed suicide in his cell, with paranoid writings everywhere, including a bible verse on his forehead, written in blood.
Aaron was able to relieve himself of some of his burden before he passed by coming out to his mom and confessing that there was a man he loved and spent time with. I am thankful for that on his behalf. However, he also disclosed that he was molested by a neighbor at a very young age.
Seeing Aaron grow up through his brother's eyes was beautiful and seeing how much love there was between them made me smile. I appreciate Jonathan's frankness and honesty in this book. He let the dark side show just as much as the light. The reader gets to really know Aaron and see him for who he was. My heart broke for him over and over again as I saw the angst and burden of his repressed sexuality brewing into anger and bad behavior and choices over and over again. The repeated head injuries only served to make it worse.
I know that Aaron was convicted of murder, and I will only say that I was obviously not at the trial, nor have I read much about it and seen the evidence. I will likely research that next. But I feel so much sorrow for Aaron- for all he could have been! For the life he could have lived! For the happiness he could have found! I mourn for who was inside of him, pushed down to the bottom so as to not be revealed.
Rest in Piece Aaron. And thank you to Jonathan for sharing this story.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
December 31, 2018
Very amateurishly written, like a high school project. And I thought there would be additional information that hasn't been made public, but truthfully there was not.
I am obsessed with this case for reasons I don't understand, so I was hoping this would be a better account of what happened, sadly it did not. If you are not obsessed, and even if you are, don't waste your time.
I am obsessed with this case for reasons I don't understand, so I was hoping this would be a better account of what happened, sadly it did not. If you are not obsessed, and even if you are, don't waste your time.
June 16, 2024
Jonathan and Aaron Hernandez were subjected to constant fighting, yelling, and physical violence in their home as children. They were also not in a financially stable home. Their father was known to use and abuse drugs and alcohol, which probably contributed a great deal to the problems that Aaron had with drugs and alcohol later in life. There was also blatant homophobia directed at Aaron from his father, which was probably very traumatic for him after being sexually assaulted by an older kid and struggling with his sexuality. The death of their father was traumatic for both boys, but Aaron seemed to take that particularly hard. There was also an estrangement with his mother after his disapproval of her new romantic partner. There is no doubt that Aaron Hernandez was a talented football player, which I can even say, and I am not interested in football in the slightest. It is unfortunate that he squandered his talent on criminal activity.
Aaron Hernandez was involved with drugs and drug dealers. He was exhibiting paranoia in social settings, which could have been drug related, mental health issues, or a combination of both. He was easily offended and felt that he had to prove himself in all situations. Aaron found himself having several run-ins with the law and getting in trouble with his team for his behavior. Aaron was charged with first degree murder in the shooting death of Odin Lloyd and was almost immediately released from the New England Patriots and had all of his merchandise removed from the stores. Aaron was convicted of this murder, but died by suicide before his appeal was completed, therefore his conviction was vacated. (Something I did not know until I read this book.)
Aaron Hernandez had all of the ingredients for trouble. An abusive childhood, poverty, coming into money, drug and alcohol addiction, and possible mental illness. Jonathan was later diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and Aaron certainly exhibited some bizarre behaviors. Another major issue Aaron was faced with was Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy (CTE). Unfortunately, this can only be confirmed during autopsy, which Aaron's was. CTE is a serious issue in contact sports, and is a degenerative issue that affects behavior, judgment, memory, and impulse control. It has been said that the case of CTE that Aaron had was one of the worst seen in someone that young. His brain was labeled a stage 3 out of 4 for CTE. All of these things had to have contributed a lot to the mess that Aaron got himself into. Aaron always maintained that he was innocent and did not murder Odin Lloyd. If he did kill him, these factors do not excuse that, but do explain how he arrived at that point. If he was innocent, these factors explain how he arrived at the point where he was found to be a good suspect in this murder.
Regardless of the guilt or innocence of Aaron Hernandez, the fact is that someone is murdered. Someone's family member and friend is gone. Nothing is bringing them back, and they have to live with this loss and as victims of a crime. The family of Aaron Hernandez are also victims. They are victims of their circumstances and victims of the actions of Aaron. They are also victims of suicide. Suicide is a subject that I have strong feelings about for a host of personal reasons, and the abs cense of someone you love who took their life is just staggering. Aaron Hernandez was a victim of himself. The entire thing has left a wake of victims, and that is something to keep in mind when you read books like this.
I hope that this book helped Aaron's brother find some measure of peace. I appreciated the raw look into their lives, and I do genuinely believe this explains a lot of Aaron's behavior. I would like to read another book that presents evidence in this murder case, as that was not really discussed in this book.
Aaron Hernandez was involved with drugs and drug dealers. He was exhibiting paranoia in social settings, which could have been drug related, mental health issues, or a combination of both. He was easily offended and felt that he had to prove himself in all situations. Aaron found himself having several run-ins with the law and getting in trouble with his team for his behavior. Aaron was charged with first degree murder in the shooting death of Odin Lloyd and was almost immediately released from the New England Patriots and had all of his merchandise removed from the stores. Aaron was convicted of this murder, but died by suicide before his appeal was completed, therefore his conviction was vacated. (Something I did not know until I read this book.)
Aaron Hernandez had all of the ingredients for trouble. An abusive childhood, poverty, coming into money, drug and alcohol addiction, and possible mental illness. Jonathan was later diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and Aaron certainly exhibited some bizarre behaviors. Another major issue Aaron was faced with was Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy (CTE). Unfortunately, this can only be confirmed during autopsy, which Aaron's was. CTE is a serious issue in contact sports, and is a degenerative issue that affects behavior, judgment, memory, and impulse control. It has been said that the case of CTE that Aaron had was one of the worst seen in someone that young. His brain was labeled a stage 3 out of 4 for CTE. All of these things had to have contributed a lot to the mess that Aaron got himself into. Aaron always maintained that he was innocent and did not murder Odin Lloyd. If he did kill him, these factors do not excuse that, but do explain how he arrived at that point. If he was innocent, these factors explain how he arrived at the point where he was found to be a good suspect in this murder.
Regardless of the guilt or innocence of Aaron Hernandez, the fact is that someone is murdered. Someone's family member and friend is gone. Nothing is bringing them back, and they have to live with this loss and as victims of a crime. The family of Aaron Hernandez are also victims. They are victims of their circumstances and victims of the actions of Aaron. They are also victims of suicide. Suicide is a subject that I have strong feelings about for a host of personal reasons, and the abs cense of someone you love who took their life is just staggering. Aaron Hernandez was a victim of himself. The entire thing has left a wake of victims, and that is something to keep in mind when you read books like this.
I hope that this book helped Aaron's brother find some measure of peace. I appreciated the raw look into their lives, and I do genuinely believe this explains a lot of Aaron's behavior. I would like to read another book that presents evidence in this murder case, as that was not really discussed in this book.
November 6, 2018
It is sad that this story is given so much attention. I have wondered why books were written about it very soon after Aaron Hernandez's death including one by his defense attorney. Did his very, very wealthy defense attorney need the money, did James Patterson and his co-writers need the money or was the purpose to just get a jump on making as much money as possible off of this story? Patterson's book was disgraceful and practically copied from Google searches.
I have four friends who lost siblings to suicide. I have another friend whose son died as a result of his service in the military. None of these suicide survivors wrote books, none of them made money off of their sibling's death and none of them had a sibling/child in prison for murder. None of the people who committed suicide played in the NFL. Perhaps that is why this story is important while the countless, senseless deaths that occur each day are not. This story has "secrets", wealth from an NFL contract, and sensationalism behind it.
Jonathan Hernandez made a public statement not long after his brother's death letting the media know how they could reach him. He tantalized with the story of the Aaron he knew, the real story, the details, etc. He got his book deal and tv appearnace. The book was written during a time of high emotion soon after Aaron Hernandez's death--at least a time of strong emotion for co-writer Jonathan Hernandez. The "hope" to help is questionable at best. There is not much new here that has not already been told. I find it egregious that his brother will profit from Aaron's death and his life. I would think this is not the way to "honor" a brother he loved. The people I know who lost loved ones to suicide and military service did find ways to honor their loved ones but not a dime was made from their efforts. One family I know who lost a child has a fundraiser each year for a scholarship in their child's name. Obviously I have my own bias and dislike of financial gain from a death--but I am not a football fan and think enough has been said about this case. What about all the victims and the fatherless child? Apparently the grieving fiancee already sold her story to television and has had another baby already. I don't find these people inspiring. I didn't buy the book. It was lent to me by a friend who lives in the town where the Hernandez brothers grew up. Save your money. You have heard it all already.
I have four friends who lost siblings to suicide. I have another friend whose son died as a result of his service in the military. None of these suicide survivors wrote books, none of them made money off of their sibling's death and none of them had a sibling/child in prison for murder. None of the people who committed suicide played in the NFL. Perhaps that is why this story is important while the countless, senseless deaths that occur each day are not. This story has "secrets", wealth from an NFL contract, and sensationalism behind it.
Jonathan Hernandez made a public statement not long after his brother's death letting the media know how they could reach him. He tantalized with the story of the Aaron he knew, the real story, the details, etc. He got his book deal and tv appearnace. The book was written during a time of high emotion soon after Aaron Hernandez's death--at least a time of strong emotion for co-writer Jonathan Hernandez. The "hope" to help is questionable at best. There is not much new here that has not already been told. I find it egregious that his brother will profit from Aaron's death and his life. I would think this is not the way to "honor" a brother he loved. The people I know who lost loved ones to suicide and military service did find ways to honor their loved ones but not a dime was made from their efforts. One family I know who lost a child has a fundraiser each year for a scholarship in their child's name. Obviously I have my own bias and dislike of financial gain from a death--but I am not a football fan and think enough has been said about this case. What about all the victims and the fatherless child? Apparently the grieving fiancee already sold her story to television and has had another baby already. I don't find these people inspiring. I didn't buy the book. It was lent to me by a friend who lives in the town where the Hernandez brothers grew up. Save your money. You have heard it all already.
March 7, 2019
I enjoyed reading this book from Jonathan Hernandez's (JH) perspective. JH was a high school and college football coach and brother of deceased New England Patriot football player Aaron Hernandez. This book is a humble and well-written account of Aaron's life but mostly childhood. It was an easy read, total of 192 pages, that took 3-4 hours. It's obvious that the writing of this book was a part of the grieving process for JH, which he stated in the acknowledgment section of the book.
The book recounts the story of two brothers and how their path strayed despite similar upbringings. Aaron had the spirit of a child, was easygoing and somewhat charismatic. Aaron found his passion early in life, and fulfilled his dreams at a young age and briefly lived a superstar lifestyle. JH was responsible and more on the serious side. JH had guidance and followed the advice of others. He lived an average life. In the book, JH shared stories of their childhood and growing up in a family that was not always perfect and sort of dysfunctional but loving and connected. He described their similar upbringing, Aaron's personality and transformation beautifully. In high school, after their father passed away and JH was away in college, Aaron began to hang around the wrong crowd and thus began his tragic downfall. You clearly see where Aaron began to make poor decisions, but especially when it came to the company (his friends) he kept after the loss of their father. There were many buried traumas and issues (i.e. loss of father at a young age, sexual abuse, brain injury/CTE) surrounding Aaron's life that was never addressed and thus contributed as well.
Even though it's a tragic story (his abuse, CTE, and the Hernandez murder case), what I enjoyed most about this book is the humanist elements and values and how beautifully JH shared his brother's truth.
SPOILER: the truth about his brother's sexuality and his brother's confession (eye-to-eye) that he did not kill anyone.
The book recounts the story of two brothers and how their path strayed despite similar upbringings. Aaron had the spirit of a child, was easygoing and somewhat charismatic. Aaron found his passion early in life, and fulfilled his dreams at a young age and briefly lived a superstar lifestyle. JH was responsible and more on the serious side. JH had guidance and followed the advice of others. He lived an average life. In the book, JH shared stories of their childhood and growing up in a family that was not always perfect and sort of dysfunctional but loving and connected. He described their similar upbringing, Aaron's personality and transformation beautifully. In high school, after their father passed away and JH was away in college, Aaron began to hang around the wrong crowd and thus began his tragic downfall. You clearly see where Aaron began to make poor decisions, but especially when it came to the company (his friends) he kept after the loss of their father. There were many buried traumas and issues (i.e. loss of father at a young age, sexual abuse, brain injury/CTE) surrounding Aaron's life that was never addressed and thus contributed as well.
Even though it's a tragic story (his abuse, CTE, and the Hernandez murder case), what I enjoyed most about this book is the humanist elements and values and how beautifully JH shared his brother's truth.
SPOILER: the truth about his brother's sexuality and his brother's confession (eye-to-eye) that he did not kill anyone.
October 29, 2019
Meh.
The good thing is that this is a quick & easy read. I can't really say it's "entertaining" because the amount of broken relationships, drug use, money wasted, and inevitable demise of several humans makes it actually pretty pathetic and sad overall. But the child like writing style and overall conversational feel of the book makes it a fast read.
I felt like Jonathan, who is the brother of Aaron Hernandez, got to lay some of his demons to rest and tried to provide an overall arc of what he felt like Aaron's "truth" looked like. In other words, he came from a messed up family, gained a ridiculous amount of money & fame quickly and at a young age, and made really poor choices that all led to a paranoid, bipolar personality that ended up hurting not only himself but other people. None of that makes it OK to kill people. Jonathan clearly loves his brother and seemed to be wrestling with the "why" but there aren't many answers or greater depth in this book.
I would have loved to learn more about CTE and how the NFL treats and follows up with its players. It is thrown in quickly in the last chapter, but could have easily been a main point of the book. How does CTE effect player personality? I would loved to have learned more about opportunities for help, treatment, support. I would have also loved a follow up on how Aaron's wife and daughter are doing. This book doesn't go into much, other than to say Aaron struggled with his sexuality and drugs.
So read it if you like the Patriots. Read it if you like TMZ. But don't read it looking for answers on a murder or details on CTE. None of that is in here.
The good thing is that this is a quick & easy read. I can't really say it's "entertaining" because the amount of broken relationships, drug use, money wasted, and inevitable demise of several humans makes it actually pretty pathetic and sad overall. But the child like writing style and overall conversational feel of the book makes it a fast read.
I felt like Jonathan, who is the brother of Aaron Hernandez, got to lay some of his demons to rest and tried to provide an overall arc of what he felt like Aaron's "truth" looked like. In other words, he came from a messed up family, gained a ridiculous amount of money & fame quickly and at a young age, and made really poor choices that all led to a paranoid, bipolar personality that ended up hurting not only himself but other people. None of that makes it OK to kill people. Jonathan clearly loves his brother and seemed to be wrestling with the "why" but there aren't many answers or greater depth in this book.
I would have loved to learn more about CTE and how the NFL treats and follows up with its players. It is thrown in quickly in the last chapter, but could have easily been a main point of the book. How does CTE effect player personality? I would loved to have learned more about opportunities for help, treatment, support. I would have also loved a follow up on how Aaron's wife and daughter are doing. This book doesn't go into much, other than to say Aaron struggled with his sexuality and drugs.
So read it if you like the Patriots. Read it if you like TMZ. But don't read it looking for answers on a murder or details on CTE. None of that is in here.
April 14, 2019
I had listened to the podcast Gladiator. As an Australian who travels regularly to the US the story of Aaron Hernandez is familiar to me (see later comments on trying to locate this book). I bought this book as a Christmas present for my husband as he was really interested during our travels over the years and has followed the story through the US mainstream media.
I have a background in Psychology and have worked with children and families within the welfare sector. I was interested from a behavioural perspective - to hear about Aaron and Johnathan's life and consider how their experience led each of them upon their differing paths.
One can't help shake your head at the opportunities at different times (in a sliding doors melodramatic way) for intervention for Aaron Hernandez.
Side note: I attempted to order this from a national bookshop here in Australia as is my preference to shop locally where possible/competitive, with shipping it was going to cost me over $65 AUD as the book had not been picked up by an Australian publisher, and even then the store were unsure if they could get it (remember it was to be a present for my husband). I ended up ordering it from Amazon, received a second book with another offer and free postage receiving it in about 5 days.
And my husband ..... he still has not finished it!
I have a background in Psychology and have worked with children and families within the welfare sector. I was interested from a behavioural perspective - to hear about Aaron and Johnathan's life and consider how their experience led each of them upon their differing paths.
One can't help shake your head at the opportunities at different times (in a sliding doors melodramatic way) for intervention for Aaron Hernandez.
Side note: I attempted to order this from a national bookshop here in Australia as is my preference to shop locally where possible/competitive, with shipping it was going to cost me over $65 AUD as the book had not been picked up by an Australian publisher, and even then the store were unsure if they could get it (remember it was to be a present for my husband). I ended up ordering it from Amazon, received a second book with another offer and free postage receiving it in about 5 days.
And my husband ..... he still has not finished it!
February 3, 2019
Wow, what a sad story. Not just the story that Jonathan Hernandez has written, but a sad life in that of his brother, Aaron. He was truly a troubled young man, and the CTE specialist summed up his life well when she said, "Aaron had all sorts of psychological and social factors that were contributing to his problems."
This doesn't negate his guilt in the crimes he was accused of and for which he was rightly punished. However, I can't ignore the many issues in his early life that led to his final demise. Issues like child molestation, fear of admitting to his true sexuality, head injuries long before he went pro, drug use, impulsivity, and paranoia. Not to mention abuse at his father's hands, witnessing violent conflicts between his parents, and later his mother's affair that deeply disturbed him. In all of this, I just see a really sad story of a kid who needed a lot of help. He was charming and endearing, which unfortunately masked a lot of pain and turmoil. Who knows how different his story might have been had he gotten the help he needed and had a better group of friends surrounding him, many of whom were likely just using him.
This doesn't negate his guilt in the crimes he was accused of and for which he was rightly punished. However, I can't ignore the many issues in his early life that led to his final demise. Issues like child molestation, fear of admitting to his true sexuality, head injuries long before he went pro, drug use, impulsivity, and paranoia. Not to mention abuse at his father's hands, witnessing violent conflicts between his parents, and later his mother's affair that deeply disturbed him. In all of this, I just see a really sad story of a kid who needed a lot of help. He was charming and endearing, which unfortunately masked a lot of pain and turmoil. Who knows how different his story might have been had he gotten the help he needed and had a better group of friends surrounding him, many of whom were likely just using him.
August 6, 2025
R E V I E W
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I have always been interested in this story. Wondering how a star NFL football player went from top plays to jail for life. Aaron’s story was always mind blowing to me when I watched documentaries on his story. Hearing Aaron’s story from someone so close to him was truly the best way to understand everything. I think this was truly a wonderful well done book on the way Aaron and his family grew up to the way fame took over. I think sometimes people are raised one way that they may only know how to live that way. Aaron’s brother talks about how his parents did go to jail and were around drugs and it was a big effect to them, I can see how that effected the way Aaron and Jonathon were living their lives. I am not saying it was ok for what Aaron did at all, but I think Jonathon did a wonderful job seeing both sides. Seeing what was wrong and what could have played an effect in Aaron’s life. Overall if you want to know more on how Aaron was raised and the whole story I think this is a great story!
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I have always been interested in this story. Wondering how a star NFL football player went from top plays to jail for life. Aaron’s story was always mind blowing to me when I watched documentaries on his story. Hearing Aaron’s story from someone so close to him was truly the best way to understand everything. I think this was truly a wonderful well done book on the way Aaron and his family grew up to the way fame took over. I think sometimes people are raised one way that they may only know how to live that way. Aaron’s brother talks about how his parents did go to jail and were around drugs and it was a big effect to them, I can see how that effected the way Aaron and Jonathon were living their lives. I am not saying it was ok for what Aaron did at all, but I think Jonathon did a wonderful job seeing both sides. Seeing what was wrong and what could have played an effect in Aaron’s life. Overall if you want to know more on how Aaron was raised and the whole story I think this is a great story!
January 3, 2022
This really gave me a different perspective about him. I always thought he was good looking and has such a great smile. Then when everything happened, I felt so upset with him and thought why would somebody that had everything going for them ruin their whole life? And was he crazy for doing such horrible things?
But his brother gave a whole knew perspective without trying to make his brother a saint. Nor did he make excuses for his brother.
I don’t think anything can be a good enough excuse for Murder. But this book does tell you what Aaron was going through. How he was feeling mentally for a very long time. I think we need to bring more awareness to CTE so that everybody can understand it and know the symptoms.
This book changed my whole perspective about Aaron. He had an illness like anybody else that gets an illness and can’t help the symptoms brought on by their illness. I truly believe his illness caused him to commit the horrible crimes he committed.
But his brother gave a whole knew perspective without trying to make his brother a saint. Nor did he make excuses for his brother.
I don’t think anything can be a good enough excuse for Murder. But this book does tell you what Aaron was going through. How he was feeling mentally for a very long time. I think we need to bring more awareness to CTE so that everybody can understand it and know the symptoms.
This book changed my whole perspective about Aaron. He had an illness like anybody else that gets an illness and can’t help the symptoms brought on by their illness. I truly believe his illness caused him to commit the horrible crimes he committed.
September 24, 2020
I listened to the audio version of this book, the narration was well done but I was disappointed in the remainder of the book.
It’s a tough call on rating a book of this sort for me. He harmed so many people. Not just those he’s accused of murdering, but also the family left behind that will forever grieve. Being someone who tragically lost a family member it never leaves you. To feel sympathy for someone who caused such tragedy .. it’s hard. That being said, DJ also lost a family member and to go back and question if he or other family members should have been more active in Aaron’s life.. well who can say? And isn’t hindsight great?
I do feel that in DJ “getting to know his brother” it does rub the wrong way. It’s more of a journal of him rethinking life and the younger version. Which I guess is what the title says, I just was a bit disappointed in the whole story.
It’s a tough call on rating a book of this sort for me. He harmed so many people. Not just those he’s accused of murdering, but also the family left behind that will forever grieve. Being someone who tragically lost a family member it never leaves you. To feel sympathy for someone who caused such tragedy .. it’s hard. That being said, DJ also lost a family member and to go back and question if he or other family members should have been more active in Aaron’s life.. well who can say? And isn’t hindsight great?
I do feel that in DJ “getting to know his brother” it does rub the wrong way. It’s more of a journal of him rethinking life and the younger version. Which I guess is what the title says, I just was a bit disappointed in the whole story.
May 18, 2023
Cawpile: 9.57 5*
I had never heard about this case living in the U.K. and had only heard of this kind of brain injury with links to sports like boxing and the like where the head is repeatedly hit, but I vividly remember when I was young a rep from a local football (soccer) club came to our school and did a training day with us and he said then how many thousands of brain cells were killed by heading the ball.
From then on I wouldn’t head a ball and tried to discourage everyone from doing so. I also thought but then what about rugby? Which of course has a lot of hits to the head like American football.
It is so sad that Aaron was so poorly and yet no one knew. That people didn’t know his brain was so poorly because of the sport he’d given his life to.
It makes you hope that in future this kind of thing would be spotted.
Very sad story, beautifully told.
I had never heard about this case living in the U.K. and had only heard of this kind of brain injury with links to sports like boxing and the like where the head is repeatedly hit, but I vividly remember when I was young a rep from a local football (soccer) club came to our school and did a training day with us and he said then how many thousands of brain cells were killed by heading the ball.
From then on I wouldn’t head a ball and tried to discourage everyone from doing so. I also thought but then what about rugby? Which of course has a lot of hits to the head like American football.
It is so sad that Aaron was so poorly and yet no one knew. That people didn’t know his brain was so poorly because of the sport he’d given his life to.
It makes you hope that in future this kind of thing would be spotted.
Very sad story, beautifully told.
December 31, 2018
Interesting look at a sad and troubled life. Aaron Hernandez's brother DJ reveals some things about the NFL star turned lifetime-imprisoned convicted murderer that definitely help define the situation little more clearly. To me, the most interesting stuff is not the closet homosexuality, but the extent of the brain damage that Hernandez suffered from. It makes me want to re-read Chuck Klosterman's essay about how the NFL will not exist in 20 years. I totally buy that. I think that at some point our society is going to decide it's not really okay to support a sport that consistently destroys the brains of its participants. I just wonder how many more high-profile players will have to commit murder or suicide, or both, before that happens.
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