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The Lightness of Hands
A quirky and heartfelt coming-of-age story about a teen girl with bipolar II who signs her failed magician father up to perform his legendary but failed illusion on live TV in order to make enough money to pay for the medications they need―from the author of Symptoms of Being Human. Perfect for fans of Adi Alsaid, David Arnold, and Arvin Ahmadi.
Sixteen-year-old Ellie Dante is desperate for something in her life to finally go right. Her father was a famous stage magician until he attempted an epic illusion on live TV―and failed. Now Ellie lives with her dad in a beat-up RV, attending high school online and performing with him at birthday parties and bars across the Midwest to make ends meet.
But when the gigs dry up, their insurance lapses, leaving Dad’s heart condition unchecked and forcing Ellie to battle her bipolar II disorder without medication.
Then Ellie receives a call from a famous magic duo, who offer fifteen thousand dollars and a shot at redemption: they want her father to perform the illusion that wrecked his career―on their live TV special, which shoots in Los Angeles in ten days.
Ellie knows her dad will refuse―but she takes the deal anyway, then lies to persuade him to head west. With the help of her online-only best friend and an unusual guy she teams up with along the way, Ellie makes a plan to stage his comeback. But when her lie is exposed, she’ll have to confront her illness and her choices head-on to save her father―and herself.
Sixteen-year-old Ellie Dante is desperate for something in her life to finally go right. Her father was a famous stage magician until he attempted an epic illusion on live TV―and failed. Now Ellie lives with her dad in a beat-up RV, attending high school online and performing with him at birthday parties and bars across the Midwest to make ends meet.
But when the gigs dry up, their insurance lapses, leaving Dad’s heart condition unchecked and forcing Ellie to battle her bipolar II disorder without medication.
Then Ellie receives a call from a famous magic duo, who offer fifteen thousand dollars and a shot at redemption: they want her father to perform the illusion that wrecked his career―on their live TV special, which shoots in Los Angeles in ten days.
Ellie knows her dad will refuse―but she takes the deal anyway, then lies to persuade him to head west. With the help of her online-only best friend and an unusual guy she teams up with along the way, Ellie makes a plan to stage his comeback. But when her lie is exposed, she’ll have to confront her illness and her choices head-on to save her father―and herself.
400 pages, Hardcover
First published April 14, 2020
34 people are currently reading
3703 people want to read
About the author
Jeff Garvin
2 books494 followersJeff Garvin is an author, musician, and actor. His debut novel, Symptoms of Being Human, is an ALA Best Fiction for Young Adults Selection, a Lambda Literary Award Finalist, a Goodreads Choice Semifinalist, and garnered starred reviews from Booklist and Publishers Weekly. Before becoming a novelist, Jeff acted on TV and toured as the lead singer of a rock band. He has a BFA in Film from Chapman University and lives in Southern California.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 130 reviews
March 5, 2023
This book was quite good. I shall give a full review in the morning.
Want to read
April 14, 2020😱 Bipolar II rep! I don’t think i’ve ever, ever, ever even HEARD of a book with a mc, or any other character for that matter, that has bipoar II. Fingers crossed that it is correctly portrayed. 🤞🏻
Bipolar Depression is seriously underrepresented & I am super excited for this !
Bipolar Depression is seriously underrepresented & I am super excited for this !
February 7, 2020
***This review originally posted on What A Nerd Girl Says***
I think that anyone can write a book about a character with bipolar disorder. Anyone can write a book about a tumultuous relationship with a parent. Anyone can write a book about tough friendships and the ups and downs of navigating a relationship. But there is something so unique and magical – literally – about this book and I blew through it in a matter of hours.
Jeff has a way of making characters stand out and jump off the page. Ellie and her father are so real, and the way they interact with each other and with others is what the core of this novel. Its the relationships and how their life – whether its the lack of money or the magic or the bipolar issues or the heart issues – is shaped by these relationships. It feels like a story between Ellie and her father, Ellie and her best friend, Ellie and her potential boyfriend, Ellie and herself and its wonderful to be in her head and see her struggle with all of the relationships that are in front of her because they’re all hard, even on the best days. Her relationships with her Liam, the love interest, and her best friend, Ripley, are so real and I think even if you have no experience on what it feels like to be bipolar, I think you can still feel what Ellie is feeling.
I think what really got me about this novel was the close relationship between Ellie and her father – my father and I are very close and I recognize a lot of similar things while reading this. My dad was a single dad for a good chunk of my life and there were often times where I felt weighted down by the struggles of raising six kids, even though I was one of those kids. I understood her frustration with her dad so much and the frustration of being poor and not knowing where the next meal is coming from. I even recognized the struggle of Ellie’s mental illness with her dad’s physical health – my dad has a lot of heart problems and while we’ve been lucky that he’s never had anything super serious *knock on wood*, I’ve definitely spent many an hour in the hospital with him, for “just in case” scenarios. But on top of that, I recognize the closeness between the two of them and I really appreciated it and I really felt that.
Lastly, I truly loved the magician element of it all. I wouldn’t say I’m a fan of magic, but I wouldn’t say I’m not either but after reading this book, it felt so fascinating to me that there would be this whole world, this whole community that existed and I’m just unaware of it because I’m not a part of it. But it really added to the story – while you were frustrated with Ellie’s dad for never having a plan, never having money, living out of a trailer, not having money for medical insurance and medication – you also you were super rooting for them to succeed as magicians too because you could see the magic that both of them felt while performing. It was fascinating and I love characters with a passion for something unusual so I super super appreciated it big time.
I think that anyone can write a book about a character with bipolar disorder. Anyone can write a book about a tumultuous relationship with a parent. Anyone can write a book about tough friendships and the ups and downs of navigating a relationship. But there is something so unique and magical – literally – about this book and I blew through it in a matter of hours.
Jeff has a way of making characters stand out and jump off the page. Ellie and her father are so real, and the way they interact with each other and with others is what the core of this novel. Its the relationships and how their life – whether its the lack of money or the magic or the bipolar issues or the heart issues – is shaped by these relationships. It feels like a story between Ellie and her father, Ellie and her best friend, Ellie and her potential boyfriend, Ellie and herself and its wonderful to be in her head and see her struggle with all of the relationships that are in front of her because they’re all hard, even on the best days. Her relationships with her Liam, the love interest, and her best friend, Ripley, are so real and I think even if you have no experience on what it feels like to be bipolar, I think you can still feel what Ellie is feeling.
I think what really got me about this novel was the close relationship between Ellie and her father – my father and I are very close and I recognize a lot of similar things while reading this. My dad was a single dad for a good chunk of my life and there were often times where I felt weighted down by the struggles of raising six kids, even though I was one of those kids. I understood her frustration with her dad so much and the frustration of being poor and not knowing where the next meal is coming from. I even recognized the struggle of Ellie’s mental illness with her dad’s physical health – my dad has a lot of heart problems and while we’ve been lucky that he’s never had anything super serious *knock on wood*, I’ve definitely spent many an hour in the hospital with him, for “just in case” scenarios. But on top of that, I recognize the closeness between the two of them and I really appreciated it and I really felt that.
Lastly, I truly loved the magician element of it all. I wouldn’t say I’m a fan of magic, but I wouldn’t say I’m not either but after reading this book, it felt so fascinating to me that there would be this whole world, this whole community that existed and I’m just unaware of it because I’m not a part of it. But it really added to the story – while you were frustrated with Ellie’s dad for never having a plan, never having money, living out of a trailer, not having money for medical insurance and medication – you also you were super rooting for them to succeed as magicians too because you could see the magic that both of them felt while performing. It was fascinating and I love characters with a passion for something unusual so I super super appreciated it big time.
July 23, 2020
Thank you to the author for sending me an ARC of this book!
Jeff Garvin has a serious talent for making characters feel very real. I was immediately sympathetic for Ellie's many stressors - living with Bipolar II, worrying about her father's health, living life on the road with their funds quickly diminishing...
And rooting for her so much as she tries to turn their lives around.
This novel will appeal to so many of my teen readers - a road trip story, a great cast of characters, and a terrific ending.
I can't wait to see what Garvin writes next. If you haven't read The Symptoms of Being Human add that to your list as well!
Jeff Garvin has a serious talent for making characters feel very real. I was immediately sympathetic for Ellie's many stressors - living with Bipolar II, worrying about her father's health, living life on the road with their funds quickly diminishing...
And rooting for her so much as she tries to turn their lives around.
This novel will appeal to so many of my teen readers - a road trip story, a great cast of characters, and a terrific ending.
I can't wait to see what Garvin writes next. If you haven't read The Symptoms of Being Human add that to your list as well!
August 15, 2020
People think depression is the same as sadness, a blue gauze that descends to tint the world a shade darker. But in truth, it’s like a snowfall of ash, obscuring the color and the taste of everything.
Wow, this book was really the thing that drove it all home for me. I ordered a copy in the mail for a few days and I was so anxious for the book to finally come, and when it did, I was not disappointed. I was enchanted the whole time.
As a whole, I feel like some details were choppy and I wished there were more scenes featuring some emotional moments, but the book was written well and with care.
The book follows our protagonist, sixteen year old Ellie Dante, as she tries to help her dad find the money to survive. Along the way, her illness causes problems and she ruins a few of her relationships. She goes under a few times, but manages to stand in the face of defeat.
Ellie and her struggle with Bipolar, was detailed nicely. We see her struggles and how she comes to terms with it, how she doesn’t let the illness define her and how she chooses to accept it as a part of herself. Everything from her struggles to her triumphs, is done so well, I found myself able to root for her.
The romance in here is also sweet and made me excited every now and then. It’s on key, and the chemistry is there. You can see Ellie and Liam in their own highs and lows, and how they find peace with other and still manage to be there, made me smile. Written with care and honesty, their growth in their relationship is admirable.
Ellie and her dad also have their relationship and we see the father and daughter work through their own issues. Ellie’s dad struggles to raise her, and fails to see the best for her. He protects his pride instead of her, and thinks performing is the best life for her. When it’s not what she wants. Through many dead ends and high peaks, we see them grow to understand one another.
And Ellie also has to struggle with financial issues and making sure her family can survive. I felt for her, and she really did make herself go through a lot throughout to story, just to make sure she had enough money to get by. It wasn’t easy, but she made it.
The Lightness Of Hands was a good and emotional story that really hit all the right places. I laughed and smiled at times, I was there for Ellie the whole way. She made it through, and by the end, so did the story as well. Excellent. Bravo. Well done.
Wow, this book was really the thing that drove it all home for me. I ordered a copy in the mail for a few days and I was so anxious for the book to finally come, and when it did, I was not disappointed. I was enchanted the whole time.
As a whole, I feel like some details were choppy and I wished there were more scenes featuring some emotional moments, but the book was written well and with care.
The book follows our protagonist, sixteen year old Ellie Dante, as she tries to help her dad find the money to survive. Along the way, her illness causes problems and she ruins a few of her relationships. She goes under a few times, but manages to stand in the face of defeat.
Ellie and her struggle with Bipolar, was detailed nicely. We see her struggles and how she comes to terms with it, how she doesn’t let the illness define her and how she chooses to accept it as a part of herself. Everything from her struggles to her triumphs, is done so well, I found myself able to root for her.
The romance in here is also sweet and made me excited every now and then. It’s on key, and the chemistry is there. You can see Ellie and Liam in their own highs and lows, and how they find peace with other and still manage to be there, made me smile. Written with care and honesty, their growth in their relationship is admirable.
Ellie and her dad also have their relationship and we see the father and daughter work through their own issues. Ellie’s dad struggles to raise her, and fails to see the best for her. He protects his pride instead of her, and thinks performing is the best life for her. When it’s not what she wants. Through many dead ends and high peaks, we see them grow to understand one another.
And Ellie also has to struggle with financial issues and making sure her family can survive. I felt for her, and she really did make herself go through a lot throughout to story, just to make sure she had enough money to get by. It wasn’t easy, but she made it.
The Lightness Of Hands was a good and emotional story that really hit all the right places. I laughed and smiled at times, I was there for Ellie the whole way. She made it through, and by the end, so did the story as well. Excellent. Bravo. Well done.
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July 15, 2021first off, huge TW for suicide, suicidal ideation, and self harm in this book. (the book actually had trigger warnings at the beginning, which should be more common!)
I think the title is really ironic, considering how heavy this book really is. This is #ownvoices for bipolar II, and the author takes such care and detail with the portrayal. I admired the way her mental illness was incorporated throughout the book: bipolar affects all aspects of Ellie's life and how she interacts with the world while still not being the plot of the book itself. She grapples with wondering what's real in her life and about who she is when she's on vs off meds, riding highs or lows.
I also loved Ellie's relationship with her father and with her best friend Ripley; neither of these relationships were perfect, but they cared so deeply about each other even when they struggled to see eye-to-eye. (Also, Ripley is ace! we love unexpected and casual ace rep)
That said, this was written by a cishet man (as far as I can tell from cursory Google), and there are parts of the narrative that come through where it's very obvious and I winced a little (or a lot). The romance was suuuper unnecessary and cringe and uhhh lowkey unhealthy and Ellie kept going
However, for the most part I enjoyed it, and I thought the bipolar II rep was important and well-integrated.
I think the title is really ironic, considering how heavy this book really is. This is #ownvoices for bipolar II, and the author takes such care and detail with the portrayal. I admired the way her mental illness was incorporated throughout the book: bipolar affects all aspects of Ellie's life and how she interacts with the world while still not being the plot of the book itself. She grapples with wondering what's real in her life and about who she is when she's on vs off meds, riding highs or lows.
I also loved Ellie's relationship with her father and with her best friend Ripley; neither of these relationships were perfect, but they cared so deeply about each other even when they struggled to see eye-to-eye. (Also, Ripley is ace! we love unexpected and casual ace rep)
That said, this was written by a cishet man (as far as I can tell from cursory Google), and there are parts of the narrative that come through where it's very obvious and I winced a little (or a lot). The romance was suuuper unnecessary and cringe and uhhh lowkey unhealthy and Ellie kept going
However, for the most part I enjoyed it, and I thought the bipolar II rep was important and well-integrated.
March 12, 2020
Her father was a rising star on the magic scene until he attempted a grand illusion, The Truck Drop, on live television and failed. Since then, a lot had changed. Her father had fallen from grace, and Ellie's life had become less stable. Though she was struggling with managing her bipolar disorder, she knew she had to help her dad redeem himself. This would be their last shot, and Ellie was determined to help her dad reclaim the magic that had once destroyed him.
I must admit, I was very intrigued by this book. I thought Garvin's debut was phenomenal, and I couldn't wait to read more of his work. From the first page, I was all in. I was so absorbed in Ellie's story, that I raced through this book, my heart wishing the best for her and her dad. Upon finishing, I declared this "stupendous", and here are five reasons why.
1. Ellie was phenomenal! She had lost so much, and was not dealt the best hand in life, but she persevered. I will always root for someone, who never gives up. But, it wasn't just her keep-going attitude, that made me love her. It was that she pushed forward, when it seemed like the universe was conspiring against her. She lost her home, her mom, and even her health insurance. They lived day to day, hoping for another gig, hoping her bipolar disorder would stay in check as the medication worked its way out of her system. She really had a full plate of worries, but she never gave up, that gave her a sort of hero status with me.
2. Though it was bumpy, Ellie shared a special relationship with her father. It was the two of them against the world, and although her dad failed to meet her basic needs at times, there was always love. This may have been Ellie's coming of age story, but it was also her dad's wakeup call. His call to step up, and be the parent she needed. To stop chasing his dream, and make the sacrifices necessary for his family.
3. I was so happy to see many different types of relationships explored in this book. I loved the friendship between Ripley and Ellie. Ripley was Ellie's best friend, who she had never met in real life, but was her source of support as she weathered all her storms. It's wonderful to see online friendships being validated, but also showing how they can have their ups and downs too. Ripley and Ellie experience a rough patch during her race to Hollywood, and it was realistic, both in the troubles they encountered, and the way it was resolved. There was also a bit of time dedicated to an adorable romance with someone from Ellie's past. It came in and out of the story, but it was a part I looked forward to, and I wanted Ellie to have that experience. It became important to me, and I was glad Garvin included it.
4. Garvin did an incredible job helping me understand what it was like living with bipolar II disorder. I wasn't aware this was an Own Voices book, when I read it, but found out later in the author's note, that Garvin himself, was bipolar. I always appreciate, when someone can share part of themselves with me, and that is probably why Garvin was so successful at weaving Ellie's symptoms and emotions relating to her mental illness into this story. He showed how her bipolar disorder affected her thoughts and relationships, and made me clearly comprehend the challenge each day could present to someone with this disorder.
5. The magic! Though I know it's all illusion and slight of hand, I am still always enthralled with magical spectacles. Garvin painted this world, vividly and in full color for us, and I loved being fully immersed in it.
Fantastic characters, rich emotional experiences, and a realistic picture of what it's like to live with bipolar II disorder made this a magical journey worth taking.
*ARC provided in exchange for an honest review.
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I must admit, I was very intrigued by this book. I thought Garvin's debut was phenomenal, and I couldn't wait to read more of his work. From the first page, I was all in. I was so absorbed in Ellie's story, that I raced through this book, my heart wishing the best for her and her dad. Upon finishing, I declared this "stupendous", and here are five reasons why.
1. Ellie was phenomenal! She had lost so much, and was not dealt the best hand in life, but she persevered. I will always root for someone, who never gives up. But, it wasn't just her keep-going attitude, that made me love her. It was that she pushed forward, when it seemed like the universe was conspiring against her. She lost her home, her mom, and even her health insurance. They lived day to day, hoping for another gig, hoping her bipolar disorder would stay in check as the medication worked its way out of her system. She really had a full plate of worries, but she never gave up, that gave her a sort of hero status with me.
2. Though it was bumpy, Ellie shared a special relationship with her father. It was the two of them against the world, and although her dad failed to meet her basic needs at times, there was always love. This may have been Ellie's coming of age story, but it was also her dad's wakeup call. His call to step up, and be the parent she needed. To stop chasing his dream, and make the sacrifices necessary for his family.
3. I was so happy to see many different types of relationships explored in this book. I loved the friendship between Ripley and Ellie. Ripley was Ellie's best friend, who she had never met in real life, but was her source of support as she weathered all her storms. It's wonderful to see online friendships being validated, but also showing how they can have their ups and downs too. Ripley and Ellie experience a rough patch during her race to Hollywood, and it was realistic, both in the troubles they encountered, and the way it was resolved. There was also a bit of time dedicated to an adorable romance with someone from Ellie's past. It came in and out of the story, but it was a part I looked forward to, and I wanted Ellie to have that experience. It became important to me, and I was glad Garvin included it.
4. Garvin did an incredible job helping me understand what it was like living with bipolar II disorder. I wasn't aware this was an Own Voices book, when I read it, but found out later in the author's note, that Garvin himself, was bipolar. I always appreciate, when someone can share part of themselves with me, and that is probably why Garvin was so successful at weaving Ellie's symptoms and emotions relating to her mental illness into this story. He showed how her bipolar disorder affected her thoughts and relationships, and made me clearly comprehend the challenge each day could present to someone with this disorder.
5. The magic! Though I know it's all illusion and slight of hand, I am still always enthralled with magical spectacles. Garvin painted this world, vividly and in full color for us, and I loved being fully immersed in it.
Fantastic characters, rich emotional experiences, and a realistic picture of what it's like to live with bipolar II disorder made this a magical journey worth taking.
*ARC provided in exchange for an honest review.
BLOG | INSTAGRAM |TWITTER | BLOGLOVIN | FRIEND ME ON GOODREADS
July 12, 2022
it was alright, the cringe of some of the sentences kinda messed it up. it wasn’t bad at all just not my cup of tea i think
April 15, 2020
The first half is a bit slow, and the book overall is just too long. 400 pages is a lot for this story. But in all, it is both charming and insightful. While the plot is about Ellie trying to get her dad to LA in hopes of reviving his career, the real point of the story is her struggle with bipolar II, grief, guilt, poverty, loneliness, and father-daughter dynamics. The author does a good job of making Ellie relatable and educating readers on what it is like to deal with mental illness on top of other typical teen issues.
Read my full review on Common Sense Media:
https://www.commonsensemedia.org/book...
Read my full review on Common Sense Media:
https://www.commonsensemedia.org/book...
November 22, 2020
I want to start by saying that this book is good. You should read it, hands down (no pun intended).
That out of the way...
This has been a tough review for me to write. Part of what makes the book so good is also what made it take forever for me to finish - it feels very real. Our main character, Ellie, suffers from bipolar II (that's not a spoiler, it's on the flap) and the struggles that she has, as well as the reaction that characters around her have, are just a bit too familiar.
I do not have bipolar, but I am very close friends with someone who does. One of my favorite parts about this book is that it does not shy away from the discomfort that the diagnosis can bring. Relationships are thoughtfully and realistically explored. The experience overall is very authentic, sometimes to the point of being raw.
A big part of what you get from this story is a road trip, similar to a really good 80's movie - John Hughes at his peak. But you also get a genuine look under the hood at a disorder that is usually treated as "crazy" by most forms of entertainment.
I highly recommend this book.
Also there's cool magic in it and stuff.
That out of the way...
This has been a tough review for me to write. Part of what makes the book so good is also what made it take forever for me to finish - it feels very real. Our main character, Ellie, suffers from bipolar II (that's not a spoiler, it's on the flap) and the struggles that she has, as well as the reaction that characters around her have, are just a bit too familiar.
I do not have bipolar, but I am very close friends with someone who does. One of my favorite parts about this book is that it does not shy away from the discomfort that the diagnosis can bring. Relationships are thoughtfully and realistically explored. The experience overall is very authentic, sometimes to the point of being raw.
A big part of what you get from this story is a road trip, similar to a really good 80's movie - John Hughes at his peak. But you also get a genuine look under the hood at a disorder that is usually treated as "crazy" by most forms of entertainment.
I highly recommend this book.
Also there's cool magic in it and stuff.
October 25, 2021
i didn’t love this. i expected it to make me feel something, but it didn’t. i appreciate the fast pacing, but i just didn’t care about the plot. i didn’t realize magic would play such a huge role in the story, and i think that’s what ruined it for me.
April 16, 2020
Trigger warning: self harm & suicide
A YA book with bipolar 2/depression rep? SIGN ME UP.
Mental health is such an important subject, and I’m happy it’s being featured more often in books, especially YA fiction.
The Lightness of Hands was a wonderful read. Sixteen year old Ellie Dante lives in an RV with her father, who happens to be a magician, and is forced to battle her Bipolar II disorder after running out of medication she can no longer afford. They’re broke, and Ellie is tired of doing all of the work, trying to make ends meet while attempting to book shows.
While the gigs begin to dry up, life gets more complicated. They have nowhere to live, her father’s heart condition is unchecked, and she’s struggling with her mental illness.
Suddenly, she gets a surprising phone call from a famous magic duo who offers fifteen thousand dollars and a shot at redemption. The catch? They want her father to perform the illusion that wrecked his career on their live TV special in a matter of days.
With the help of her online-only best friend, and the special help of someone surprising...she might be able to pull it off.
I highly recommend this book if you love YA, and books that talk about mental illness. But with that subject aside, there is so much more to this book. Such as family struggles, friendships, love, and how important it is to take a risk every once in a while.
I’ll be posting a more in-depth book review on my blog soon!
A YA book with bipolar 2/depression rep? SIGN ME UP.
Mental health is such an important subject, and I’m happy it’s being featured more often in books, especially YA fiction.
The Lightness of Hands was a wonderful read. Sixteen year old Ellie Dante lives in an RV with her father, who happens to be a magician, and is forced to battle her Bipolar II disorder after running out of medication she can no longer afford. They’re broke, and Ellie is tired of doing all of the work, trying to make ends meet while attempting to book shows.
While the gigs begin to dry up, life gets more complicated. They have nowhere to live, her father’s heart condition is unchecked, and she’s struggling with her mental illness.
Suddenly, she gets a surprising phone call from a famous magic duo who offers fifteen thousand dollars and a shot at redemption. The catch? They want her father to perform the illusion that wrecked his career on their live TV special in a matter of days.
With the help of her online-only best friend, and the special help of someone surprising...she might be able to pull it off.
I highly recommend this book if you love YA, and books that talk about mental illness. But with that subject aside, there is so much more to this book. Such as family struggles, friendships, love, and how important it is to take a risk every once in a while.
I’ll be posting a more in-depth book review on my blog soon!
May 10, 2020
This book was simply okay. I went into this book knowing absolutely nothing except it featured a girl with bipolar disorder, and while I thought the bipolar rep was pretty great, I didn't really care for the plot or character relationships.
While I don't have bipolar II myself, by the end of the book, I better understood the highs and lows of someone who much suffer from this disorder, and by reading other reviews I saw that a lot of other people were very impressed by this representation and how it wove into the story.
Aside from that, I didn't realize how much this book would focus on magic and illusionists. That just wasn't really my thing, so I pretty much blanked out whenever the main character would talk about famous magicians and magic tricks. Also, I feel as if the story took way longer than it needed to to be told. Some parts were very repetitive, and I understand that Ellie's bipolar II tends to have her up and down in repetitive loops. That was completely fine to me, as it realistically portrays bipolar II. But she had like three heartwarming talks with her dad that basically said the same things, same with Liam and Ripley.
So, I'll give the book three stars for the great portrayed of bipolar disorder that is usually absent in YA books, but the plot and characters were not that interesting and the book seemed much too long.
While I don't have bipolar II myself, by the end of the book, I better understood the highs and lows of someone who much suffer from this disorder, and by reading other reviews I saw that a lot of other people were very impressed by this representation and how it wove into the story.
Aside from that, I didn't realize how much this book would focus on magic and illusionists. That just wasn't really my thing, so I pretty much blanked out whenever the main character would talk about famous magicians and magic tricks. Also, I feel as if the story took way longer than it needed to to be told. Some parts were very repetitive, and I understand that Ellie's bipolar II tends to have her up and down in repetitive loops. That was completely fine to me, as it realistically portrays bipolar II. But she had like three heartwarming talks with her dad that basically said the same things, same with Liam and Ripley.
So, I'll give the book three stars for the great portrayed of bipolar disorder that is usually absent in YA books, but the plot and characters were not that interesting and the book seemed much too long.
March 6, 2022
This book wasn’t on my TBR, but the colour on the cover got me. And the girl looks and dresses exactly like me.
This is the first book where the art of performing was shown through magic rather than music or theatre, and that magic was an actual art rather than a side-gimmick or a joke. It was refreshing to see Ellie strive for her passion but also try to balance that with the practicality and reality of life. It doesn’t help that she also had to manage her bipolar II, non-existent funds, and her father’s heart issues.
I loved the complicated yet loving relationship between Ellie and her father; how they both made sacrifices for each other regarding their day-to-day lives and their medical situations. Also her friendship with Ripley? Fucking amazing. Internet friend rep! I wish we got more of him in the book.
This is the first book where the art of performing was shown through magic rather than music or theatre, and that magic was an actual art rather than a side-gimmick or a joke. It was refreshing to see Ellie strive for her passion but also try to balance that with the practicality and reality of life. It doesn’t help that she also had to manage her bipolar II, non-existent funds, and her father’s heart issues.
I loved the complicated yet loving relationship between Ellie and her father; how they both made sacrifices for each other regarding their day-to-day lives and their medical situations. Also her friendship with Ripley? Fucking amazing. Internet friend rep! I wish we got more of him in the book.
April 14, 2020
I really liked this story. After thoroughly enjoying Symptoms Of Being Human, I wanted to go into this story with low expectations, and this story knocked it out of the park. And it's safe to say that I preferred this book to Symptoms Of Being Human.
The portrayal of bipolar disorder was my favourite part, because it was raw, honest, and extremely vulnerable. Ellie's suicide attempt was such a necessary scene, and I liked how it was written, because I could feel Ellie's emotions more than I ever had before. It takes so much strength to pull yourself out of a dark place mentally.
Jeff's writing is so lyrical, and wonderful. His character development from Ellie to Ellie's dad to Liam to Ripley was absolutely so great.
I would definitely recommend this book, and I'm so excited to read whatever Jeff is writing next.
The portrayal of bipolar disorder was my favourite part, because it was raw, honest, and extremely vulnerable. Ellie's suicide attempt was such a necessary scene, and I liked how it was written, because I could feel Ellie's emotions more than I ever had before. It takes so much strength to pull yourself out of a dark place mentally.
Jeff's writing is so lyrical, and wonderful. His character development from Ellie to Ellie's dad to Liam to Ripley was absolutely so great.
I would definitely recommend this book, and I'm so excited to read whatever Jeff is writing next.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
April 27, 2020
I loved everything about this fast read. I loved the father/daughter relationship. I loved the magic. I loved the friendships. But my favorite thing about this book was the mental health aspect.
I have never read any other book where a fictional character had bipolar II. It’s the one we don’t really hear about and so many of us struggle with it, so it was great to see it portrayed in such an accurate way.
Big props to Garvin for presenting Ellie’s mental health struggles in a realistic fashion and not the stereotypical ways we often see. I highly recommend this book to everyone!
I received a copy in exchange for my honest opinion.
I have never read any other book where a fictional character had bipolar II. It’s the one we don’t really hear about and so many of us struggle with it, so it was great to see it portrayed in such an accurate way.
Big props to Garvin for presenting Ellie’s mental health struggles in a realistic fashion and not the stereotypical ways we often see. I highly recommend this book to everyone!
I received a copy in exchange for my honest opinion.
April 17, 2020
I have bipolar 2 and it's very rare that a book with a bipolar character discusses bipolar 2. It almost always focuses on one. A lot of people don't realize there's a difference.
I connected with a lot of things in this story. There were quotes that really stood out. I basically finished this book in one sitting and it's been a long while since I've done that.
Going to be reading the other book by this author next.
I connected with a lot of things in this story. There were quotes that really stood out. I basically finished this book in one sitting and it's been a long while since I've done that.
Going to be reading the other book by this author next.
Read
May 1, 2020Graded By: Brian
Cover Story: Lovely Assistant
Drinking Buddy: Non-Alcoholic
MPAA Rating: PG-13 (adult situations, language, alcohol use)
Talky Talk: Misdirection
Bonus Factors: Heist, Stage Magic
Bromance Status: May I Have a Volunteer?
Read the full book report here.
Cover Story: Lovely Assistant
Drinking Buddy: Non-Alcoholic
MPAA Rating: PG-13 (adult situations, language, alcohol use)
Talky Talk: Misdirection
Bonus Factors: Heist, Stage Magic
Bromance Status: May I Have a Volunteer?
Read the full book report here.
October 3, 2022
So I just read the incredible book The Lightness of Hands by Jeff Gavin, which is a story about a young woman with severe bipolar II disorder as she struggles with her aging father through poverty, massive insecurities and the struggles of ageisim and learns self-acceptance.
I'm glad I picked up this book. I knew very little about bipolar disorder before reading it despite having many people in my life who live constantly with this condition.
The Lightness of Hands taught me important, none-discriminatory things I didn't know about people who aren't me and that's the mark of any good book in my eyes. I'm very glad I read this novel.
I'm glad I picked up this book. I knew very little about bipolar disorder before reading it despite having many people in my life who live constantly with this condition.
The Lightness of Hands taught me important, none-discriminatory things I didn't know about people who aren't me and that's the mark of any good book in my eyes. I'm very glad I read this novel.
May 21, 2024
not this book almost ruining umbrella by rihanna for me… ellie’s dad bugged me… there’s no way a teenager should be responsible for both of their livelihood. he was very imperfect as a parent, which i suppose is actually very realistic. good, but probably wouldn’t read again.
May 10, 2020
4.5 stars. This book was so great, and it had actual representation for mental health that WASN’T romanticized like other YA tends to do.
August 22, 2020
I loved it! It was exciting and surprising until the end! I loved how Ellie’s mental health got better and how she didn’t lose hope.
April 2, 2021
Absolutely loved this book!
May 20, 2023
I- this book was absolutely phenomenal, I laughed, and I cried. This book portrays an amazing view on mental health. All the ups and downs and in-betweens. This book saved me from my reading slump and allowed me to feel all the emotions. Highly recommend, it however does talk about suicide and suicidal ideation. With that comes the depression and the manic highs, so if you are going to read this just make sure you are in the right headspace.
August 20, 2024
Oh, this was such a fantastic story, I loved the idea and watching the story unfold!
April 24, 2020
I received a copy of this book for free in a Goodreads giveaway.
There is a lot going on in this book. Ellie, the narrator, is a teenager who's enrolled in online high school, while she assists her father, a disgraced magician, in booking small gigs to support themselves while they drive around in an RV. Ellie is bipolar, her father has heart problems, they're running out of medication and money, and they need to get to California to recreate a big magic trick that derailed her father's career years ago. Meanwhile, Ellie manages to bump into an attractive, nice guy she sort of knew in high school who's now in college at a magic gig they booked, and this blossoms into a flirtation that is of course full of ups and downs due to various teenage misunderstandings. The first third or so dragged a bit, as they go from place to place, trying to find work as magicians. But it did pick up, and the cast of characters is colorful and memorable. I particularly appreciated the depiction of Ellie's bipolar disorder; it seemed realistic, the way she deals with the symptoms while off her medication, the way she experiences both highs and lows and how various people around her react to her in different ways. But there are too many deus ex machina moments that just took me out of the story. Every time they seemed like they've hit rock bottom and have nowhere to go, someone (and I think they were coincidentally always men) came to save Ellie, with incredibly well-timed generosity and kindness. The number of breaks Ellie and her father get is nothing short of amazing, and I get that putting characters in a rough spot is part of creating suspense and excitement, but there were just way too many miracles on this journey.
There is a lot going on in this book. Ellie, the narrator, is a teenager who's enrolled in online high school, while she assists her father, a disgraced magician, in booking small gigs to support themselves while they drive around in an RV. Ellie is bipolar, her father has heart problems, they're running out of medication and money, and they need to get to California to recreate a big magic trick that derailed her father's career years ago. Meanwhile, Ellie manages to bump into an attractive, nice guy she sort of knew in high school who's now in college at a magic gig they booked, and this blossoms into a flirtation that is of course full of ups and downs due to various teenage misunderstandings. The first third or so dragged a bit, as they go from place to place, trying to find work as magicians. But it did pick up, and the cast of characters is colorful and memorable. I particularly appreciated the depiction of Ellie's bipolar disorder; it seemed realistic, the way she deals with the symptoms while off her medication, the way she experiences both highs and lows and how various people around her react to her in different ways. But there are too many deus ex machina moments that just took me out of the story. Every time they seemed like they've hit rock bottom and have nowhere to go, someone (and I think they were coincidentally always men) came to save Ellie, with incredibly well-timed generosity and kindness. The number of breaks Ellie and her father get is nothing short of amazing, and I get that putting characters in a rough spot is part of creating suspense and excitement, but there were just way too many miracles on this journey.
June 14, 2021
This book really moved me. It's one of the most rawly honest takes on what it's like to be young with a mental illness. Or any age really. I think the way Garvin writes about the ways mental illness can warp our sense of worth, reality, logic, proportion, etc., is really effective and rings so true for me. Especially how "knowing" about how your illness works to trick you and being able to do something about that when you're in a bad spot are VERY different things. Also, the questions the main character has about who her "true" self is, and whether the meds fundamentally change who she is, is well handled here.
This is not an easy read only because of the subject matter and emotional pull. It is a book that is well written and interesting and important for those who want to see better representation of bipolar and/or long to better understand some of the complex facets of living with such a disease.
This is not an easy read only because of the subject matter and emotional pull. It is a book that is well written and interesting and important for those who want to see better representation of bipolar and/or long to better understand some of the complex facets of living with such a disease.
August 4, 2020
"Sixteen-year-old Ellie Dante is desperate for something in her life to finally go right."
Yet is noticed and asked out by a kind, attractive boy in the FIRST CHAPTER.
Can we stop with this trope please?
Why can't we have protaganists genuinely struggle with loneliness and isolation throughout the entire book? Why is the problem always fixed by a boy? Why is our main character always described as being a loser and a pariah yet always manages to get with the dreamboat? Is it too much to have a relatable YA main character?
This had potential but was pretty much ruined from the very first chapter.
Yet is noticed and asked out by a kind, attractive boy in the FIRST CHAPTER.
Can we stop with this trope please?
Why can't we have protaganists genuinely struggle with loneliness and isolation throughout the entire book? Why is the problem always fixed by a boy? Why is our main character always described as being a loser and a pariah yet always manages to get with the dreamboat? Is it too much to have a relatable YA main character?
This had potential but was pretty much ruined from the very first chapter.
August 10, 2020
This was a well-written book about a teenage girl suffering from bipolar II, living on the road with her disgraced magician of a father who is offered a chance to turn their lives around.
I picked up this book because of the lovely cover, the intriguing title and the description which promised stage magic. I finished Loveless recently, and the covers of the two books are very similar in terms of colour, so much that I accidentally tapped on this one instead while I wasn't yet done with Loveless. I usually make a big production of choosing what to read next, so I took it as a sign from the one above and decided to go for it.
I have no personal experience with this mental disorder, but I felt that the author did a very good job describing the episodes of depression as well as hypomania. Based on his note at the end, I understand that the book is ownvoices. At one point the MC says that depression is different from sadness, and that embarrassed me a bit because I've been suspecting for a while now that I might have untreated depression. Comparing my listlessness and lack of motivation and good humour with Ellie's black tides of feelings, there literally is no comparison. I gained more of an awareness of how difficult life is for people who are mentally ill and respect how much effort they have to put in order to present a normal facade.
This book also looks at how those who live with someone who is mentally ill are also affected, helpless to make it better even though they have best intentions, wondering if that puts the blame on them. Ellie is aware of how badly she is behaving, but she simply can't be anything other than how she feels. We see the importance of having a support group and how online friends can provide a real and meaningful connection.
Ellie's father is a magician, so we get a glimpse into their world illusions and stage effects. I've always been fascinated by legerdemain, and I was really impressed with how even though the characters discuss and perform a variety of tricks, we aren't given an explanation of how those feats are performed, and that's really cool. There was a point when I used to watch the TV show breaking the magician's code, and while I was really fascinated by what goes on behind the scenes, I don't mind leaving the mystery unsolved (very much unlike Higgins).
The one thing I had a real issue with was Liam. Liam was nice - too nice, in my opinion - to Ellie. I know there doesn't have to be a reason or an explanation for why you like someone, but 95% of the time she was unfriendly or downright hostile to him, and he still came back to her. Am I to understand that the time they spent backstage during high school made such a favourable impression on him that even though he pretty much forgot about her for the next year or so one encounter outside school made him want to ask her out? I'm not saying that she doesn't deserve his attention, but I would like to know more about what he saw in her. He doesn't run away when she tells him about her illness, nor does he immediately say that it doesn't matter. There is a hesitation as he considers the implications which almost scares her away, but I respected him for that. Through Liam, we also get to see that privileged kids aren't without their own problems, like wanting something different from their life other than what their parents have mapped out for them. It is no real comparison to what others suffer, but that doesn't mean it is inconsequential. Bravery comes in various shapes and forms.
This is the author's sophomore work and their first book, Symptoms of Being Human has been on my TBR for a while because of the intriguing title and also because of the diverse rep in the description. The writing was just the right amount of descriptive without being too purple. The characters had distinct personalities and the narration was excellent - I felt like I got a good understanding of Ellie's nature and emotions. The plot was well-paced, with each event triggering a change in the landscape of Ellie's present and future decisions, culminating in a way that she did not see coming. I was rooting for her, and though it's made obvious that there's no magical cure, she's a little bit better - more accepting of herself and who she is and isn't - than when we first met her. Ellie isn't perfect - she makes bad decisions - but she tries to make the best of things, and ultimately we're all trying to do the same.
I picked up this book because of the lovely cover, the intriguing title and the description which promised stage magic. I finished Loveless recently, and the covers of the two books are very similar in terms of colour, so much that I accidentally tapped on this one instead while I wasn't yet done with Loveless. I usually make a big production of choosing what to read next, so I took it as a sign from the one above and decided to go for it.
I have no personal experience with this mental disorder, but I felt that the author did a very good job describing the episodes of depression as well as hypomania. Based on his note at the end, I understand that the book is ownvoices. At one point the MC says that depression is different from sadness, and that embarrassed me a bit because I've been suspecting for a while now that I might have untreated depression. Comparing my listlessness and lack of motivation and good humour with Ellie's black tides of feelings, there literally is no comparison. I gained more of an awareness of how difficult life is for people who are mentally ill and respect how much effort they have to put in order to present a normal facade.
It was times like this when I hated my illness, hated myself—and where was the line between the two? Was there a line? Even when the gray had loosened its grip, even when I was riding high, I did and said terrible things to the people I loved. [...] If that’s who I was off meds, wasn’t that the “real” me? Didn’t that make the medicated, “functional” version of me nothing more than a chemical marionette? Did the illness disfigure my personality—or did the medication build me a false one? I didn’t know which Ellie was real. I just knew I didn’t like her.
This book also looks at how those who live with someone who is mentally ill are also affected, helpless to make it better even though they have best intentions, wondering if that puts the blame on them. Ellie is aware of how badly she is behaving, but she simply can't be anything other than how she feels. We see the importance of having a support group and how online friends can provide a real and meaningful connection.
Ellie's father is a magician, so we get a glimpse into their world illusions and stage effects. I've always been fascinated by legerdemain, and I was really impressed with how even though the characters discuss and perform a variety of tricks, we aren't given an explanation of how those feats are performed, and that's really cool. There was a point when I used to watch the TV show breaking the magician's code, and while I was really fascinated by what goes on behind the scenes, I don't mind leaving the mystery unsolved (very much unlike Higgins).
The one thing I had a real issue with was Liam. Liam was nice - too nice, in my opinion - to Ellie. I know there doesn't have to be a reason or an explanation for why you like someone, but 95% of the time she was unfriendly or downright hostile to him, and he still came back to her. Am I to understand that the time they spent backstage during high school made such a favourable impression on him that even though he pretty much forgot about her for the next year or so one encounter outside school made him want to ask her out? I'm not saying that she doesn't deserve his attention, but I would like to know more about what he saw in her. He doesn't run away when she tells him about her illness, nor does he immediately say that it doesn't matter. There is a hesitation as he considers the implications which almost scares her away, but I respected him for that. Through Liam, we also get to see that privileged kids aren't without their own problems, like wanting something different from their life other than what their parents have mapped out for them. It is no real comparison to what others suffer, but that doesn't mean it is inconsequential. Bravery comes in various shapes and forms.
This is the author's sophomore work and their first book, Symptoms of Being Human has been on my TBR for a while because of the intriguing title and also because of the diverse rep in the description. The writing was just the right amount of descriptive without being too purple. The characters had distinct personalities and the narration was excellent - I felt like I got a good understanding of Ellie's nature and emotions. The plot was well-paced, with each event triggering a change in the landscape of Ellie's present and future decisions, culminating in a way that she did not see coming. I was rooting for her, and though it's made obvious that there's no magical cure, she's a little bit better - more accepting of herself and who she is and isn't - than when we first met her. Ellie isn't perfect - she makes bad decisions - but she tries to make the best of things, and ultimately we're all trying to do the same.
November 11, 2023
3.5, rounded up
It was engaging but there were maybe a few too many instances of "things go terribly wrong…but wait, good luck to the rescue!" I also realized about 80% of the way through that I think the only reason it passes the Bechdel test is that Ellie briefly talks to a woman about the show they're about to do. That's a bit odd for a book where the romance element is fairly minimal (at times, it felt like the author just remembered they were including one), but there really are no female characters aside from Ellie herself. Which isn't necessarily an issue—she has one friend, one parent, and one love interest—but maybe make a couple of the side characters women?
I liked the magic element. It isn't something you read about very often, so it was cool to see, especially from the assistant/performer perspective. I also thought the bipolar rep was pretty good. While I don't have bipolar disorder, the thoughts and feelings Ellie had about having it felt true to my experience with other mental diagnoses, the lows felt true to my experience with depression, and the highs fit with what I've previously seen about hypomania. It also just felt very real. The pacing of the words speeds up as she's manic, the tone becomes more dull and melancholy as she's depressed, and her ability to think through her decisions and clearly look at her situation fluctuated in parallel. Which is another thing that resonated with me—it really captured how it feels to know you're looking at the world through the lens of your disorder, but like…what if you aren't? What if it really is like that? But you know it isn't. But it feels like it is. So maybe it is. But probably not. But maybe? I've been there so many times, and it can make it so hard to make sense of the world and to make good decisions. I feel like that must be a near-universal experience with mental illness, and this is up there in how well I've seen it portrayed.
There's also some nuanced discussion of taking responsibility for what you do when you're in the depths of your illness, while still acknowledging that it wasn't entirely something you could control. I think there could have been a bit more of that, given that Ellie makes a bunch of incredibly impulsive and questionable decisions that affect the people around her in a lot of ways, some of which can be attributed to mania and some of which are just being a desperate teenager.
I kind of have thoughts about Liam, but honestly he's barely even there, so I don't know. Whatever. I liked Riley, though. And actually, now that I think about it, even the dad is barely a presence a lot of the time. We really are trapped in Ellie's mind with her in a time and space where she's largely focused on her own self and experiences, so everyone else feels beyond secondary. That's not something I normally have a problem with, but I know it's a pet peeve for some people. They do all have distinct voices, though, so I'm inclined to say it was a deliberate choice rather than just lack of development.
Also, Flynn and Kellar are Penn and Teller, which I am ashamed to say I did not get until she said Kellar didn't talk. I have never decided how I feel about slightly-name-changed real celebs in books, but I thought it was interesting to do so with characters that actually exist beyond the name drop. It seemed to fit with what I know of the real people, at least, and the playing card story was cute.
It was engaging but there were maybe a few too many instances of "things go terribly wrong…but wait, good luck to the rescue!" I also realized about 80% of the way through that I think the only reason it passes the Bechdel test is that Ellie briefly talks to a woman about the show they're about to do. That's a bit odd for a book where the romance element is fairly minimal (at times, it felt like the author just remembered they were including one), but there really are no female characters aside from Ellie herself. Which isn't necessarily an issue—she has one friend, one parent, and one love interest—but maybe make a couple of the side characters women?
I liked the magic element. It isn't something you read about very often, so it was cool to see, especially from the assistant/performer perspective. I also thought the bipolar rep was pretty good. While I don't have bipolar disorder, the thoughts and feelings Ellie had about having it felt true to my experience with other mental diagnoses, the lows felt true to my experience with depression, and the highs fit with what I've previously seen about hypomania. It also just felt very real. The pacing of the words speeds up as she's manic, the tone becomes more dull and melancholy as she's depressed, and her ability to think through her decisions and clearly look at her situation fluctuated in parallel. Which is another thing that resonated with me—it really captured how it feels to know you're looking at the world through the lens of your disorder, but like…what if you aren't? What if it really is like that? But you know it isn't. But it feels like it is. So maybe it is. But probably not. But maybe? I've been there so many times, and it can make it so hard to make sense of the world and to make good decisions. I feel like that must be a near-universal experience with mental illness, and this is up there in how well I've seen it portrayed.
There's also some nuanced discussion of taking responsibility for what you do when you're in the depths of your illness, while still acknowledging that it wasn't entirely something you could control. I think there could have been a bit more of that, given that Ellie makes a bunch of incredibly impulsive and questionable decisions that affect the people around her in a lot of ways, some of which can be attributed to mania and some of which are just being a desperate teenager.
I kind of have thoughts about Liam, but honestly he's barely even there, so I don't know. Whatever. I liked Riley, though. And actually, now that I think about it, even the dad is barely a presence a lot of the time. We really are trapped in Ellie's mind with her in a time and space where she's largely focused on her own self and experiences, so everyone else feels beyond secondary. That's not something I normally have a problem with, but I know it's a pet peeve for some people. They do all have distinct voices, though, so I'm inclined to say it was a deliberate choice rather than just lack of development.
Also, Flynn and Kellar are Penn and Teller, which I am ashamed to say I did not get until she said Kellar didn't talk. I have never decided how I feel about slightly-name-changed real celebs in books, but I thought it was interesting to do so with characters that actually exist beyond the name drop. It seemed to fit with what I know of the real people, at least, and the playing card story was cute.
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