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A man in the worst place he can be between two women and forced to choose which one lives or dies." Houston homicide detective, John O'Reilly, is torn between two women. One is the woman he's loved without hope for years. The other carries his unborn child. Now, a man bent on revenge wants O'Reilly to choose, and any choice he makes could cost him everything. Gutsy sheriff s deputy, Lanie Falconetti, is determined not to repeat her mother s mistakes in love. Her no-strings attached affair with John O Reilly leads to an unexpected, but joyfully welcomed pregnancy. However, the shadow from John s past threatens not only her chance at happiness, but her life and that of her unborn baby as well.
This title contains explicit sex and violence.
This title contains explicit sex and violence.
280 pages, Kindle Edition
First published February 27, 2007
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1440 people want to read
About the author
Linda Winfree
27 books82 followersHow does a high school English teacher end up plotting murders? She uses her experiences as a cop’s wife to become a writer of romantic suspense! Linda Winfree lives in a quintessential small Georgia town with her husband and two children. By day, she teaches American Literature, advises the student government and coaches the drama team; by night she pens sultry books full of murder and mayhem.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 195 reviews
April 16, 2019
Hated John and Beth, two selfish asswipes who deserved each other. I’m sorry as well but everyone who said Lanie was a bitch is completely unfair. She had a man live with her and treated him well, hoping he would wake up and cherish her. Instead he treated her like a booty call. Yes, maybe she should have kicked him to the curb before, but she just wanted him to love her back. He blatantly chose Beth over her and she witnessed this, than nearly died and lost their baby, and she is not entitled to a few months of payback? I think she was
Completely justified in dishing out some harsh truths, a few weeks of being sassy do not compare to months of John neglecting her and her pregnancy! John did not know what love was, he did not love Beth and in my opinion he did not love Lanie, she still seemed like a consolation prize to me. I still think he would have chosen Beth in general, even when she tries to say to him if that’s what you really want come with me now, his reaction is basically I cannot now I’m trapped with Lanie and the baby! Even after all the drama with the kidnapping, even though he apparently now loves Lanie and his child, even after knowing it hurt Lanie that he has feelings for Beth, did he stop talking to Beth? No he checks in on her and stays friends! It was ridiculous! Beth was a self absorbed cow thinking she was an authority on everything. This was the fool who had to call John out to save her from car trouble when he had a pregnant girlfriend, then she wants to dish out relationship advice and get in Lanie’s face? Go fall down a hole Beth. I also never understood John’s obsession with Beth, she was instantly forgettable, needy, boring and arrogant. Lanie was sweet, and as he said sexy and feisty, how is there any competition? John didn’t really fight for Lanie but basically expected instant forgiveness after minimum effort. He still manages to insult and manipulate Lanie even after she came back from hospital. I loved Lanie but was disappointed in her basically begging John back after Beth ‘put her in her place’ (gag). Waste of space hero, and heroine should have met and married a different fella! Love this is not!
When speaking to Beth on the phone:
“John?” His partner’s voice greeted him and sent a shiver over his nerves, as it always did when he was unprepared. And even sometimes when he was prepared, when they sat close together in the unmarked unit, and he remembered the way it had been between them. Once upon a time when they’d been more than just colleagues and friends.’
‘John shrugged into his leather jacket. Memories of making love to Beth one long ago night in the battered Ford clicked through his mind. Guilt tore through him, and he shoved the recollection away. His focus should be on the woman in his embrace, not the one who didn’t want him anymore. “She loves the damn thing.”
‘The brief contact spread comfortable warmth through his body, and he shrugged away. Think about something else. Baseball. The Yankees in the World Series. Autopsies. Remember that last body, the guy who stepped in front of a semi. Lanie. Think about Lanie, for God’s sake. You know, the woman who’s having your baby, the woman who’s everything you’ve ever looked for—smart, beautiful, independent, sassy as hell. Except she wasn’t the woman sitting in the driver’s seat. She wasn’t the woman he’d sworn to protect with his life. She wasn’t the woman he’d loved without hope for years.‘
‘The reality of her words slipped away as remembrance flooded his mind—Beth’s screams, Mitchell’s curses, the bullet burning his shoulder. He struggled to sit up, and the lurking pain tore through his chest. “Beth. Oh my God, Beth. Got to find her—” Lanie’s hands pushed at his arms. “Stop. You can’t—” He thrust her away, his arms heavy and uncoordinated, agony shooting through him with each movement. He ignored it. “Damn it, I’ve got to find Beth.” “Everyone’s looking for her. John, you’re going to pull out your—” A sharp stinging tore through his hand, and he stared at the blood spurting from his skin, the intravenous line lying useless on the bed now. He shoved to a sitting position, his head swimming.’
“I do understand. And you can help her best by getting better.” Lanie’s soothing tone grated against his ears. “You don’t understand.” He snarled the words at her, and she stepped back, a startled expression crossing her face. “You can’t.”
‘Other uncertainties rushed in, filling the void of unanswered questions. His lack of interest in their child. The forgotten doctor’s appointments. The nights she woke alone, to find him standing at the window, brooding and staring out at the waves. Had he been thinking of Beth? Wishing he were free of Lanie and his unborn son?’
Lanie ran a hand over her burning eyes. “I won’t allow this baby to grow up like I did, with a resentful father.” “Lanie, you don’t even know that he’s resentful. You—” “He is.” Forgotten appointments. A crib he had yet to put together. Cases that came before childbirth classes. Another woman’s name on his lips. The defenses crumbled, and she fought back tears. “I thought he was getting used to the idea, that he loved me and would love our baby… God, how could I not have seen this?” (Seriously this guy is a waste of space).
“O’Reilly, you haven’t seen antagonistic yet.” She lowered the notepad, pinning him with a stare. “I’m trying to ignore for the moment that you exposed Lanie to danger.”
“Damn it, she’s not in danger!”
“This from the guy who let down his guard enough to allow someone to take his service weapon. Mitchell left you alive for a reason—he thinks you’re to blame for the failure of his marriage. He’s been here for God knows how long, obviously surveilling you. He has to know about Lanie and your involvement with her, has to know she’s pregnant, and you don’t think she’s in danger? I figured you for a selfish jerk, but I didn’t think you were stupid. Hell, was I wrong.”
“You love her, don’t you?” The quiet, deadly words brought him to a stop. For the first time, he glimpsed agony beneath the ice. Guilt cramped his stomach, and he softened his voice.
“Lanie, I didn’t mean for this to happen.”
“I’m sure you didn’t.”
Her gaze didn’t move from his, but the existence of their unborn child hung between them, the double meaning heavy in her words.
“Were you sleeping with her, too?”
Anger rocketed through his veins. “No, damn it, I wasn’t sleeping with her.”
“Of course not.” That same harsh laugh escaped her, and she turned away.
“If she was sleeping with you, you wouldn’t have needed me, would you? So were you thinking of her while you were with me?”
“I can take care of myself. And as good as Cait is, there’s only one problem with her scenario—in order for Mitchell to use me against you, you’d have to give a damn about me. Goodbye, John.”
‘That’s what you thought, O’Reilly. How do you know what she needs? You never asked. You just took what you wanted and the hell with her feelings.’
‘The memory of the awful hurt in her eyes stabbed him with renewed guilt, but he shook off the emotion. She knew what she was getting into from day one with him. Her eyes were open. Yeah, sure. But she didn’t know everything, did she, O’Reilly?’
And John had started out his son’s life by putting him and his mother in danger. He was off to a great start. “John?” Sheila’s tone made him suspect she’d called his name more than once. He shook the panic away, pain shooting through his skull. “Do you want to see him? I can take you up to the nursery.”
He wasn’t ready. Seeing him meant he was real. If he was real, avoidance was no longer an option. John tugged a hand through his hair and over his nape.
“I… I’ll go up in a little He wasn’t ready. Seeing him meant he was real. If he was real, avoidance was no longer an option. John tugged a hand through his hair and over his nape. “I… I’ll go up in a little while. I’m going to check in on Nicole and Beth.” (Like I said he is unbelievable!)
It gets worse, this moment happens when he is talking to Beth:
“John. You’re going to make a great dad. Go see him.” He shrugged.
“Want to go with me?” Her body stiffened, and the smile disappeared altogether.
“No. I’m not the person who should be there.”
“Damn it, Beth, it’s not a proposal—”
With a frustrated growl, Beth ground the cigarette out and threw up her hands.
“Fine. I love you. Is that what you want to hear? Nicole needs a daddy, and it’s been a while since I had a really good lay. The doctor says she can go home this afternoon, and I’m planning to catch a flight back to El Paso as soon as humanly possible. I can’t stay here. Want to come with us? We’ll set up house.”
Anger curled up in his gut and licked at his nerves.
“You know I can’t go now.”
“The reality is you left her as soon as she told you she was pregnant, if you were ever there to start with. Write her a child support check every month and get out of her life. You’ll be doing her a favor.”
“Look, give her some time. She’s been awake, what? Thirty-six hours? She’s got a baby she doesn’t remember giving birth to, a neurosurgeon telling her everything that could still go wrong, and you’re pissed off because she doesn’t want to see you? You royally screwed up, O’Reilly. You’re lucky she didn’t dispatch Cait to kill you in your sleep and hide the body.”
John is pathetic, because Lanie shockingly is still in pain in the hospital a couple of days after coming out of a come, and has not suddenly forgiven him, he said this:
‘Jeff cleared his throat, drawing John’s attention.
“Are you sure there’s no hope for reconciliation?”
John shook his head. He’d spent half the night looking for that hope and hadn’t found it.
“She won’t even see me.” (Oh because you tried so hard!)
“I was just dropping these off,” Casey explained. He jerked a thumb over his shoulder at John. “John-boy’s got to be in court in a couple of weeks on the Vansant case. The DA wanted Beth to testify, but says he can settle for O’Reilly.”
At the mention of Beth’s name, Lanie darted a glance at John’s face. She wondered how much of the whole sordid mess his colleagues knew. He met her gaze, his expression unreadable. Casey turned. “Have you heard from her? The guys have asked about her.”
John shrugged, his gaze not leaving Lanie’s.
“She’s settled in with her aunt in El Paso. Nicole’s having some trouble getting adjusted to school. That’s about it.”
“You think that? You think making love to you didn’t mean anything to me?”
“I think I was an easy lay, a substitute for what you really wanted, and you got caught by a bad condom.”
She dropped the words between them with deadly precision and watched him flinch.
“Are you going to try to make me think differently?”
“Maybe at first it was like that. But not later.”
When he doesn’t get his own way:
“I don’t want to talk about it, Lanie.” The toast popped up, and she watched the play of muscles in his arms as he buttered it.
“I’m looking for another place like you wanted, all right?”
She wrapped her hands around her mug.
“I think it’s for the best.”
“Yeah.”
He slid the toast in front of her and dropped two more slices of bread in the toaster.
“We need to make arrangements for custody and visitation.” Her stomach dropped. She’d dreaded this conversation.
“You know I wouldn’t ever keep him from you. He needs you.” He finally looked at her, and the dead expression in his navy gaze startled her.
“Right now, I think he’s better off with me.”
This lame attempt for us to feel sorry for Poor baby John!
Mitchell had hurt him, too. She didn’t want to admit it, but John had suffered at Mitchell’s hands, been a victim as well. He’d been placed in the untenable position of choosing between the woman he loved and the woman he felt responsible for, the one carrying his child. Lanie closed her eyes against a spurt of agony. At least the entry team had spared him actually making that decision and spared her the knowledge that he would have chosen Beth over her.
‘The color drained from his face, fury blazing in his eyes. “You little… It doesn’t matter, does it? None of what I’ve done, nothing I will do, is going to convince you, is it? I wasn’t sure I wanted him when you were pregnant, and you’re going to hold it over my head forever, aren’t you?”
He tried to shrug off the despondency settling on him—he’d given Lanie time and space, and he was no closer to getting through to her than he’d been when she’d awakened in the hospital, looking at him with hatred in the golden depths of her eyes.
Let’s not forget Beth’s delusional words of wisdom:
“You know, Lanie, he’s not going to hang around and let you kick him in the gut forever.” Beth joined her at the railing. “Don’t you think he’s been punished enough?”
Beth matched her glare for glare. “He was a shallow jerk, and he followed his libido into your bed. I don’t remember you asking for hearts and flowers at the time. When the condom broke and you got pregnant, he took responsibility. He avoided the emotional involvement, but a lot of guys would have just walked away and left you to handle it on your own. He didn’t.”
Looking unimpressed, Beth folded her arms over her chest. “Because he’s probably the best friend I’ve ever had and you’re ripping him apart. He loves that baby, and for some unknown reason, he loves you. And instead of thanking your lucky stars that he does, you’re still punishing him for what Doug did.”
I absolutely loathe Beth!
On a last note, Lanie should have kicked Beth’s ass, and she deserved better than John! !
Completely justified in dishing out some harsh truths, a few weeks of being sassy do not compare to months of John neglecting her and her pregnancy! John did not know what love was, he did not love Beth and in my opinion he did not love Lanie, she still seemed like a consolation prize to me. I still think he would have chosen Beth in general, even when she tries to say to him if that’s what you really want come with me now, his reaction is basically I cannot now I’m trapped with Lanie and the baby! Even after all the drama with the kidnapping, even though he apparently now loves Lanie and his child, even after knowing it hurt Lanie that he has feelings for Beth, did he stop talking to Beth? No he checks in on her and stays friends! It was ridiculous! Beth was a self absorbed cow thinking she was an authority on everything. This was the fool who had to call John out to save her from car trouble when he had a pregnant girlfriend, then she wants to dish out relationship advice and get in Lanie’s face? Go fall down a hole Beth. I also never understood John’s obsession with Beth, she was instantly forgettable, needy, boring and arrogant. Lanie was sweet, and as he said sexy and feisty, how is there any competition? John didn’t really fight for Lanie but basically expected instant forgiveness after minimum effort. He still manages to insult and manipulate Lanie even after she came back from hospital. I loved Lanie but was disappointed in her basically begging John back after Beth ‘put her in her place’ (gag). Waste of space hero, and heroine should have met and married a different fella! Love this is not!
When speaking to Beth on the phone:
“John?” His partner’s voice greeted him and sent a shiver over his nerves, as it always did when he was unprepared. And even sometimes when he was prepared, when they sat close together in the unmarked unit, and he remembered the way it had been between them. Once upon a time when they’d been more than just colleagues and friends.’
‘John shrugged into his leather jacket. Memories of making love to Beth one long ago night in the battered Ford clicked through his mind. Guilt tore through him, and he shoved the recollection away. His focus should be on the woman in his embrace, not the one who didn’t want him anymore. “She loves the damn thing.”
‘The brief contact spread comfortable warmth through his body, and he shrugged away. Think about something else. Baseball. The Yankees in the World Series. Autopsies. Remember that last body, the guy who stepped in front of a semi. Lanie. Think about Lanie, for God’s sake. You know, the woman who’s having your baby, the woman who’s everything you’ve ever looked for—smart, beautiful, independent, sassy as hell. Except she wasn’t the woman sitting in the driver’s seat. She wasn’t the woman he’d sworn to protect with his life. She wasn’t the woman he’d loved without hope for years.‘
‘The reality of her words slipped away as remembrance flooded his mind—Beth’s screams, Mitchell’s curses, the bullet burning his shoulder. He struggled to sit up, and the lurking pain tore through his chest. “Beth. Oh my God, Beth. Got to find her—” Lanie’s hands pushed at his arms. “Stop. You can’t—” He thrust her away, his arms heavy and uncoordinated, agony shooting through him with each movement. He ignored it. “Damn it, I’ve got to find Beth.” “Everyone’s looking for her. John, you’re going to pull out your—” A sharp stinging tore through his hand, and he stared at the blood spurting from his skin, the intravenous line lying useless on the bed now. He shoved to a sitting position, his head swimming.’
“I do understand. And you can help her best by getting better.” Lanie’s soothing tone grated against his ears. “You don’t understand.” He snarled the words at her, and she stepped back, a startled expression crossing her face. “You can’t.”
‘Other uncertainties rushed in, filling the void of unanswered questions. His lack of interest in their child. The forgotten doctor’s appointments. The nights she woke alone, to find him standing at the window, brooding and staring out at the waves. Had he been thinking of Beth? Wishing he were free of Lanie and his unborn son?’
Lanie ran a hand over her burning eyes. “I won’t allow this baby to grow up like I did, with a resentful father.” “Lanie, you don’t even know that he’s resentful. You—” “He is.” Forgotten appointments. A crib he had yet to put together. Cases that came before childbirth classes. Another woman’s name on his lips. The defenses crumbled, and she fought back tears. “I thought he was getting used to the idea, that he loved me and would love our baby… God, how could I not have seen this?” (Seriously this guy is a waste of space).
“O’Reilly, you haven’t seen antagonistic yet.” She lowered the notepad, pinning him with a stare. “I’m trying to ignore for the moment that you exposed Lanie to danger.”
“Damn it, she’s not in danger!”
“This from the guy who let down his guard enough to allow someone to take his service weapon. Mitchell left you alive for a reason—he thinks you’re to blame for the failure of his marriage. He’s been here for God knows how long, obviously surveilling you. He has to know about Lanie and your involvement with her, has to know she’s pregnant, and you don’t think she’s in danger? I figured you for a selfish jerk, but I didn’t think you were stupid. Hell, was I wrong.”
“You love her, don’t you?” The quiet, deadly words brought him to a stop. For the first time, he glimpsed agony beneath the ice. Guilt cramped his stomach, and he softened his voice.
“Lanie, I didn’t mean for this to happen.”
“I’m sure you didn’t.”
Her gaze didn’t move from his, but the existence of their unborn child hung between them, the double meaning heavy in her words.
“Were you sleeping with her, too?”
Anger rocketed through his veins. “No, damn it, I wasn’t sleeping with her.”
“Of course not.” That same harsh laugh escaped her, and she turned away.
“If she was sleeping with you, you wouldn’t have needed me, would you? So were you thinking of her while you were with me?”
“I can take care of myself. And as good as Cait is, there’s only one problem with her scenario—in order for Mitchell to use me against you, you’d have to give a damn about me. Goodbye, John.”
‘That’s what you thought, O’Reilly. How do you know what she needs? You never asked. You just took what you wanted and the hell with her feelings.’
‘The memory of the awful hurt in her eyes stabbed him with renewed guilt, but he shook off the emotion. She knew what she was getting into from day one with him. Her eyes were open. Yeah, sure. But she didn’t know everything, did she, O’Reilly?’
And John had started out his son’s life by putting him and his mother in danger. He was off to a great start. “John?” Sheila’s tone made him suspect she’d called his name more than once. He shook the panic away, pain shooting through his skull. “Do you want to see him? I can take you up to the nursery.”
He wasn’t ready. Seeing him meant he was real. If he was real, avoidance was no longer an option. John tugged a hand through his hair and over his nape.
“I… I’ll go up in a little He wasn’t ready. Seeing him meant he was real. If he was real, avoidance was no longer an option. John tugged a hand through his hair and over his nape. “I… I’ll go up in a little while. I’m going to check in on Nicole and Beth.” (Like I said he is unbelievable!)
It gets worse, this moment happens when he is talking to Beth:
“John. You’re going to make a great dad. Go see him.” He shrugged.
“Want to go with me?” Her body stiffened, and the smile disappeared altogether.
“No. I’m not the person who should be there.”
“Damn it, Beth, it’s not a proposal—”
With a frustrated growl, Beth ground the cigarette out and threw up her hands.
“Fine. I love you. Is that what you want to hear? Nicole needs a daddy, and it’s been a while since I had a really good lay. The doctor says she can go home this afternoon, and I’m planning to catch a flight back to El Paso as soon as humanly possible. I can’t stay here. Want to come with us? We’ll set up house.”
Anger curled up in his gut and licked at his nerves.
“You know I can’t go now.”
“The reality is you left her as soon as she told you she was pregnant, if you were ever there to start with. Write her a child support check every month and get out of her life. You’ll be doing her a favor.”
“Look, give her some time. She’s been awake, what? Thirty-six hours? She’s got a baby she doesn’t remember giving birth to, a neurosurgeon telling her everything that could still go wrong, and you’re pissed off because she doesn’t want to see you? You royally screwed up, O’Reilly. You’re lucky she didn’t dispatch Cait to kill you in your sleep and hide the body.”
John is pathetic, because Lanie shockingly is still in pain in the hospital a couple of days after coming out of a come, and has not suddenly forgiven him, he said this:
‘Jeff cleared his throat, drawing John’s attention.
“Are you sure there’s no hope for reconciliation?”
John shook his head. He’d spent half the night looking for that hope and hadn’t found it.
“She won’t even see me.” (Oh because you tried so hard!)
“I was just dropping these off,” Casey explained. He jerked a thumb over his shoulder at John. “John-boy’s got to be in court in a couple of weeks on the Vansant case. The DA wanted Beth to testify, but says he can settle for O’Reilly.”
At the mention of Beth’s name, Lanie darted a glance at John’s face. She wondered how much of the whole sordid mess his colleagues knew. He met her gaze, his expression unreadable. Casey turned. “Have you heard from her? The guys have asked about her.”
John shrugged, his gaze not leaving Lanie’s.
“She’s settled in with her aunt in El Paso. Nicole’s having some trouble getting adjusted to school. That’s about it.”
“You think that? You think making love to you didn’t mean anything to me?”
“I think I was an easy lay, a substitute for what you really wanted, and you got caught by a bad condom.”
She dropped the words between them with deadly precision and watched him flinch.
“Are you going to try to make me think differently?”
“Maybe at first it was like that. But not later.”
When he doesn’t get his own way:
“I don’t want to talk about it, Lanie.” The toast popped up, and she watched the play of muscles in his arms as he buttered it.
“I’m looking for another place like you wanted, all right?”
She wrapped her hands around her mug.
“I think it’s for the best.”
“Yeah.”
He slid the toast in front of her and dropped two more slices of bread in the toaster.
“We need to make arrangements for custody and visitation.” Her stomach dropped. She’d dreaded this conversation.
“You know I wouldn’t ever keep him from you. He needs you.” He finally looked at her, and the dead expression in his navy gaze startled her.
“Right now, I think he’s better off with me.”
This lame attempt for us to feel sorry for Poor baby John!
Mitchell had hurt him, too. She didn’t want to admit it, but John had suffered at Mitchell’s hands, been a victim as well. He’d been placed in the untenable position of choosing between the woman he loved and the woman he felt responsible for, the one carrying his child. Lanie closed her eyes against a spurt of agony. At least the entry team had spared him actually making that decision and spared her the knowledge that he would have chosen Beth over her.
‘The color drained from his face, fury blazing in his eyes. “You little… It doesn’t matter, does it? None of what I’ve done, nothing I will do, is going to convince you, is it? I wasn’t sure I wanted him when you were pregnant, and you’re going to hold it over my head forever, aren’t you?”
He tried to shrug off the despondency settling on him—he’d given Lanie time and space, and he was no closer to getting through to her than he’d been when she’d awakened in the hospital, looking at him with hatred in the golden depths of her eyes.
Let’s not forget Beth’s delusional words of wisdom:
“You know, Lanie, he’s not going to hang around and let you kick him in the gut forever.” Beth joined her at the railing. “Don’t you think he’s been punished enough?”
Beth matched her glare for glare. “He was a shallow jerk, and he followed his libido into your bed. I don’t remember you asking for hearts and flowers at the time. When the condom broke and you got pregnant, he took responsibility. He avoided the emotional involvement, but a lot of guys would have just walked away and left you to handle it on your own. He didn’t.”
Looking unimpressed, Beth folded her arms over her chest. “Because he’s probably the best friend I’ve ever had and you’re ripping him apart. He loves that baby, and for some unknown reason, he loves you. And instead of thanking your lucky stars that he does, you’re still punishing him for what Doug did.”
I absolutely loathe Beth!
On a last note, Lanie should have kicked Beth’s ass, and she deserved better than John! !
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
June 25, 2024
Disgusting, limp, wishy washy, dumb man-child forever pining for what he can't have. For the OW when he is with heroine. For the heroine when OW finally tells him yes, he can have her. He went to check if OW and her daughter were okay BEFORE he went to check on his own preemie son that the heroine almost died giving birth to. He continues to keep in touch with OW while supposedly trying to work things out with heroine. I had to stop reading after he called the heroine a bad mother cause otherwise I would have had to reach into the kindle to grab him by his entrails and swing him around a cactus shop. You want me to salivate over a hero like this???
November 26, 2018
A high-quality hate read with a waffling, weak H, a sanctimonious OW, and an h who for some reason is blamed for her mostly completely natural responses to unacceptable behavior.
When the OW lectures the h on how she's hurting the H and she doesn't deserve him, I honest to God wished that her stalker had gotten her. That's how wrong it rubbed me.
When the OW lectures the h on how she's hurting the H and she doesn't deserve him, I honest to God wished that her stalker had gotten her. That's how wrong it rubbed me.
June 14, 2022
I liked the book despite the hero.
The story was compelling, a lil bit of mystery in it which didn't overwhelm at all.
The hero is the usual idiot beta who thinks he's in love with ow he can't have while he's in a relationship with the heroine.
The heroine here doesn't know though.
They started an affair when she got pregnant and the hero, while not being nasty or cruel, seems not to be very enthusiastic to become a father, but the heroine thinks he's just taken with his job.
Actually he's pining for one of his colleagues, a woman he had an affair years before but who's not in love with him.
This woman has a psycho ex who decides he's got enough and now he has to make her pay for leaving him.
So he kidnaps her and her daughter and shoots the hero.
When he's in hospital the heroine finds out the ugly truth, that is the hero was in love with ow and she's a mere substitute .
Of course she's very angry and disappointed, because she's in love with him.
Big drama with psycho ex kidnapping and beating the heroine and asking the hero to choose between the two women.
Thanks god the madman is taken because of course whatever his choice, the madman would have killed both women anyway (IMO).
The heroine gives birth to a fine son but she's comatose for days, and while the zero realizes he never loved ow but loves the heroine instead, he takes care of his son, the baby he didn't want but now loves very much.
The heroine goes back home and they spend two months together while she can recover from her injuries.
The heroine has a slight brain damage that prevents her from dealing with numbers, and she needs the hero to take care of their son, but she's determined to kick him out of her life as soon as she's ok.
The hero tries very hard to win her trust back again but both have a past with baggage, he had a sick stepfather who killed his mother, she had a sick mother who killed herself because her husband never loved her, so they have real issues with trust.
Eventually they are together and happy, of course. But I'm not. Happy, I mean.
So, this hero was really crappy, he thought he was in love with ow and still he was in a relationship with another woman and this is something I really don't understand.
If he was really in love with ow he wouldn't be able to have an affair with another, and we know that he was crazy for the heroine and was always having sex with her all the time.
What kind of crap is he?
He thought that having sex with the heroine could make him forget ow, how awful is it?
Then when she risks her life he's all remorseful and realizes he loved her all along and he didn't really love ow but was feeling protective because ow was like his mother, a woman abused, and he couldn't protect his mother so he felt he had another chance becoming ow protector.
I prefer men who knows their mind, and not this kind of losers.
And eventually ow tells the heroine not to leave the hero because he won't wait forever and another woman will come and grab him.
But please, be my guest!
A man who never went to an appointment with ob gyn to see how his son was and never cared about the heroine outside the bedroom, what a prize he is, really.
I don't like that she settles for him because it's what she chose to do, she settles for being second best. If the hero could have ow's love he would not be with the heroine at all, it's only because ow didn't love him and told him so in not uncertain terms that he chose the heroine.
And I don't care that he tries to make it better and to be a decent father when he didn't want the child before, he was absent and was unfaithful to the heroine not phisycally but in his heart anyway.
He was always thinking of ow.
She had to be almost killed because he realized she was important to him.
So, no I hated the hero and I wish she found a man who loved her and not only considered a subsitute for another.
This was disgusting and coward.
And in the end he left the heroine again, because now he's the one who is in love and wants her love or nothing, so when she tells him she won't marry him he leaves her again. It's always about him. He's the one who makes the rules.
Heroine, dear, run away.
The title should be when it mattered most, that is he should have told her he loved her when she still had not his son and she still wasn't in danger.
Now it's too late.
So the book was good, very angsty and well written but the hero, well I leave him to the thousands women who obviously are waiting for him to be free, according to ow who, by the way, didn't want him...
The story was compelling, a lil bit of mystery in it which didn't overwhelm at all.
The hero is the usual idiot beta who thinks he's in love with ow he can't have while he's in a relationship with the heroine.
The heroine here doesn't know though.
They started an affair when she got pregnant and the hero, while not being nasty or cruel, seems not to be very enthusiastic to become a father, but the heroine thinks he's just taken with his job.
Actually he's pining for one of his colleagues, a woman he had an affair years before but who's not in love with him.
This woman has a psycho ex who decides he's got enough and now he has to make her pay for leaving him.
So he kidnaps her and her daughter and shoots the hero.
When he's in hospital the heroine finds out the ugly truth, that is the hero was in love with ow and she's a mere substitute .
Of course she's very angry and disappointed, because she's in love with him.
Big drama with psycho ex kidnapping and beating the heroine and asking the hero to choose between the two women.
Thanks god the madman is taken because of course whatever his choice, the madman would have killed both women anyway (IMO).
The heroine gives birth to a fine son but she's comatose for days, and while the zero realizes he never loved ow but loves the heroine instead, he takes care of his son, the baby he didn't want but now loves very much.
The heroine goes back home and they spend two months together while she can recover from her injuries.
The heroine has a slight brain damage that prevents her from dealing with numbers, and she needs the hero to take care of their son, but she's determined to kick him out of her life as soon as she's ok.
The hero tries very hard to win her trust back again but both have a past with baggage, he had a sick stepfather who killed his mother, she had a sick mother who killed herself because her husband never loved her, so they have real issues with trust.
Eventually they are together and happy, of course. But I'm not. Happy, I mean.
So, this hero was really crappy, he thought he was in love with ow and still he was in a relationship with another woman and this is something I really don't understand.
If he was really in love with ow he wouldn't be able to have an affair with another, and we know that he was crazy for the heroine and was always having sex with her all the time.
What kind of crap is he?
He thought that having sex with the heroine could make him forget ow, how awful is it?
Then when she risks her life he's all remorseful and realizes he loved her all along and he didn't really love ow but was feeling protective because ow was like his mother, a woman abused, and he couldn't protect his mother so he felt he had another chance becoming ow protector.
I prefer men who knows their mind, and not this kind of losers.
And eventually ow tells the heroine not to leave the hero because he won't wait forever and another woman will come and grab him.
But please, be my guest!
A man who never went to an appointment with ob gyn to see how his son was and never cared about the heroine outside the bedroom, what a prize he is, really.
I don't like that she settles for him because it's what she chose to do, she settles for being second best. If the hero could have ow's love he would not be with the heroine at all, it's only because ow didn't love him and told him so in not uncertain terms that he chose the heroine.
And I don't care that he tries to make it better and to be a decent father when he didn't want the child before, he was absent and was unfaithful to the heroine not phisycally but in his heart anyway.
He was always thinking of ow.
She had to be almost killed because he realized she was important to him.
So, no I hated the hero and I wish she found a man who loved her and not only considered a subsitute for another.
This was disgusting and coward.
And in the end he left the heroine again, because now he's the one who is in love and wants her love or nothing, so when she tells him she won't marry him he leaves her again. It's always about him. He's the one who makes the rules.
Heroine, dear, run away.
The title should be when it mattered most, that is he should have told her he loved her when she still had not his son and she still wasn't in danger.
Now it's too late.
So the book was good, very angsty and well written but the hero, well I leave him to the thousands women who obviously are waiting for him to be free, according to ow who, by the way, didn't want him...
June 22, 2013
Ugh! It's another one of those hard to rate books. I actually enjoyed this one. I'm pretty much a sucker for the unrequited love trope. There were high points in the book for sure but there are low points as well where I feel the story dragged a little bit.
And another thing I didn't get was the blurb. Totally misleading. The issue whether John will choose Lanie, the mother of his child or Beth, the woman he was hopelessly in love with for years were already resolved around 25% to 30% of the book. This book is basically about John realizing that the thing he was looking for has been right there all along. This is about him owning up to his feelings and making amends with the woman he didn't realize he loved all along.
Anyway, still a solid read. I especially love how the book touched on Lanie's postpartum depression. It was very realistic and done really well. The ending was a little abrupt for me and this could use a great epilogue. Still, don't count this book out yet. You might find yourself enjoying it. :D
3.5 to 4 stars!!
And another thing I didn't get was the blurb. Totally misleading. The issue whether John will choose Lanie, the mother of his child or Beth, the woman he was hopelessly in love with for years were already resolved around 25% to 30% of the book. This book is basically about John realizing that the thing he was looking for has been right there all along. This is about him owning up to his feelings and making amends with the woman he didn't realize he loved all along.
Anyway, still a solid read. I especially love how the book touched on Lanie's postpartum depression. It was very realistic and done really well. The ending was a little abrupt for me and this could use a great epilogue. Still, don't count this book out yet. You might find yourself enjoying it. :D
3.5 to 4 stars!!
January 7, 2022
On a scale of one to even, I just can't.
I'm a mixed bag of emotions. Don't know what to rate this! And the book hangover is not helping my case. One thing is for certain, What Mattered Most kept me teetering on the edge of my seat the ENTIRE time. I read nonstop, pulling an all-nighter. Angst can kill. The main characters, Lanie & John, felt three-dimensional and were easy to connect with. I'll rate it 4 Stars for the time being.
The main/secondary characters worked in law enforcement.
HEA √ (no epilogue)
Note to Self:
Add to the reread pile.
Added to 'marriage in trouble' shelf even though the couple wasn't married. They had been a couple for a year, living together, and having a baby, at the start of the book.
I'm a mixed bag of emotions. Don't know what to rate this! And the book hangover is not helping my case. One thing is for certain, What Mattered Most kept me teetering on the edge of my seat the ENTIRE time. I read nonstop, pulling an all-nighter. Angst can kill. The main characters, Lanie & John, felt three-dimensional and were easy to connect with. I'll rate it 4 Stars for the time being.
The main/secondary characters worked in law enforcement.
HEA √ (no epilogue)
Note to Self:
Add to the reread pile.
Added to 'marriage in trouble' shelf even though the couple wasn't married. They had been a couple for a year, living together, and having a baby, at the start of the book.
October 17, 2017
On the whole I liked this, I wanted angst and I got it. Unfortunately I didn't like Lanie much, and even when she softened up a bit I didn't believe in her love for him. The book ended abruptly with no epilogue to help me believe in her feelings for him.
May 25, 2023
Review in Portuguese and English
O cara é um babaca. O casal trabalha como policial. Ele é apaixonado pela parceira de trabalho dele, mas está em um relacionamento com nossa heroína que está grávida dele.
A tal Beth é uma vadia manipuladora que usa o John. Beth não está apaixonada por ele, mas mantém ele preso em uma ilusão. Ela o chama para solucionar todos os problemas dela e mantem John preso na teia dela.
Ele é um completo idiota e trata Lanie muito mal. Ela fica grávida e ele ignora todas as necessidades dela. John desmarca compromissos, não vai nas consultas médicas dela, se atrasa para jantares com amigos dela e larga tudo para resolver qualquer problema da Beth.
Laine está apaixonada por ele e pensa que ele a ama.
Mas John acaba envolvendo Laine em problemas de Beth e acaba colocando a vida de Laine e do bebê em risco. O ex-marido da Beth é um psicopata que acha que John é o responsável pelo fim do casamento dele com Beth.
John acaba sendo ferido quando o ex-marido de Beth comete um sequestro. No hospital ele acaba admitindo que ama Beth e Laine fica completamente arrasada.
O psicopata ataca as duas mulheres e John é obrigado a escolher qual das duas salvar.
Laine acaba em coma e a vida do bebê é posta em risco. A partir dali nós temos uma batalha porque John tem um choque muito grande.
Se eu fosse Laine eu chutava o traseiro dele porque ele cometeu o pior tipo de traição imaginável. Durante todo o tempo de relacionamento do casal ele estava apaixonado por outra mulher e ignorou a gravidez da Laine completamente.
Fiquei com muita raiva de John, mas ele foi persistente em provar que ele seria um bom pai e que amava Laine.
Eu tive esperança que Laine não o perdoasse, mas não foi o que aconteceu. Eu adoro quando a heroína chuta o traidor e segue adiante.
--------------------------------------
The guy is an asshole. The couple works as a police officer. He is in love with co-worker of his, but he's in a relationship with our heroine who is pregnant with his child.
That Beth is a manipulative bitch who uses John. Beth is not in love with him, but keeps him trapped in an illusion. She calls to solve all her problems and keep John stuck in her Web.
He's a complete idiot and treats Lanie very badly. She gets pregnant and he ignores all her needs. John clear commitments, not going to the doctor's appointments, late for dinner with her friends and drop everything to solve any problem of Beth.
Laine is in love with him and thinks that he loves her.
But John ends up involving Laine in Beth problems and ends up putting the life of Laine and the baby at risk. Beth's ex-husband is a psychopath who think John is responsible for the end of his marriage to Beth.
John ends up being injured when the ex-husband of Beth commits a kidnapping. In the hospital he ends up admitting he loves Beth and Laine is completely devastated.
The psychopath attacks both women and John is forced to choose which of the two save.
Laine ends up in a coma and the baby's life is put at risk. From there we have a battle because John has a very big shock.
If I were Laine I'd kick his ass because he committed the worst kind of betrayal imaginable. During all the time of the couple's relationship he was in love with another woman and ignored completely Laine's pregnancy.
I was very angry with John, but he was persistent in proving that he was a good father and he loved Laine.
I hoped that Laine didn't forgive him, but that's not what happened. I love it when the heroine kicks the traitor and move on.
O cara é um babaca. O casal trabalha como policial. Ele é apaixonado pela parceira de trabalho dele, mas está em um relacionamento com nossa heroína que está grávida dele.
A tal Beth é uma vadia manipuladora que usa o John. Beth não está apaixonada por ele, mas mantém ele preso em uma ilusão. Ela o chama para solucionar todos os problemas dela e mantem John preso na teia dela.
Ele é um completo idiota e trata Lanie muito mal. Ela fica grávida e ele ignora todas as necessidades dela. John desmarca compromissos, não vai nas consultas médicas dela, se atrasa para jantares com amigos dela e larga tudo para resolver qualquer problema da Beth.
Laine está apaixonada por ele e pensa que ele a ama.
Mas John acaba envolvendo Laine em problemas de Beth e acaba colocando a vida de Laine e do bebê em risco. O ex-marido da Beth é um psicopata que acha que John é o responsável pelo fim do casamento dele com Beth.
John acaba sendo ferido quando o ex-marido de Beth comete um sequestro. No hospital ele acaba admitindo que ama Beth e Laine fica completamente arrasada.
O psicopata ataca as duas mulheres e John é obrigado a escolher qual das duas salvar.
Laine acaba em coma e a vida do bebê é posta em risco. A partir dali nós temos uma batalha porque John tem um choque muito grande.
Se eu fosse Laine eu chutava o traseiro dele porque ele cometeu o pior tipo de traição imaginável. Durante todo o tempo de relacionamento do casal ele estava apaixonado por outra mulher e ignorou a gravidez da Laine completamente.
Fiquei com muita raiva de John, mas ele foi persistente em provar que ele seria um bom pai e que amava Laine.
Eu tive esperança que Laine não o perdoasse, mas não foi o que aconteceu. Eu adoro quando a heroína chuta o traidor e segue adiante.
--------------------------------------
The guy is an asshole. The couple works as a police officer. He is in love with co-worker of his, but he's in a relationship with our heroine who is pregnant with his child.
That Beth is a manipulative bitch who uses John. Beth is not in love with him, but keeps him trapped in an illusion. She calls to solve all her problems and keep John stuck in her Web.
He's a complete idiot and treats Lanie very badly. She gets pregnant and he ignores all her needs. John clear commitments, not going to the doctor's appointments, late for dinner with her friends and drop everything to solve any problem of Beth.
Laine is in love with him and thinks that he loves her.
But John ends up involving Laine in Beth problems and ends up putting the life of Laine and the baby at risk. Beth's ex-husband is a psychopath who think John is responsible for the end of his marriage to Beth.
John ends up being injured when the ex-husband of Beth commits a kidnapping. In the hospital he ends up admitting he loves Beth and Laine is completely devastated.
The psychopath attacks both women and John is forced to choose which of the two save.
Laine ends up in a coma and the baby's life is put at risk. From there we have a battle because John has a very big shock.
If I were Laine I'd kick his ass because he committed the worst kind of betrayal imaginable. During all the time of the couple's relationship he was in love with another woman and ignored completely Laine's pregnancy.
I was very angry with John, but he was persistent in proving that he was a good father and he loved Laine.
I hoped that Laine didn't forgive him, but that's not what happened. I love it when the heroine kicks the traitor and move on.
“Did O’Reilly show for this one?”
John had stood her up again. A cold knot of hurt lodged in her throat, and she swallowed against it.
“Why do you let him get away with this?” A frown pulled Steve’s dark brows together and he shrugged. “You wouldn’t tolerate it from anyone else.”
So what if he missed the sonogram, missed seeing the awesome reality of their baby just weeks from birth?
The baby had been a kick to the jaw, thanks to a faulty condom.
“John?” His partner’s voice greeted him and sent a shiver over his nerves, as it always did when he was unprepared. And even sometimes when he was prepared, when they sat close together in the unmarked unit, and he remembered the way it had been between them. Once upon a time when they’d been more than just colleagues and friends.
“I know you and Lanie are going out tonight, but I need a favor.” Apology hovered in Beth’s voice.
John shrugged into his leather jacket. Memories of making love to Beth one long ago night in the battered Ford clicked through his mind. Guilt tore through him, and he shoved the recollection away. His focus should be on the woman in his embrace, not the one who didn’t want him anymore.
The brief contact spread comfortable warmth through his body, and he shrugged away.
Except she wasn’t the woman sitting in the driver’s seat. She wasn’t the woman he’d sworn to protect with his life. She wasn’t the woman he’d loved without hope for years.
“You did.” The night she’d told him it was over, right after he’d poured out his heart, offered to be Nicole’s daddy and tried to get her to forget the man who’d ruined her life.
Lips brushed his. “I love you.” He struggled to open his eyes. “Beth?” Warm fingers linked through his. “No, it’s me.”
He glared at her, almost hating her for standing between him and Beth’s safety. “You wouldn’t dare.”
“If Mitchell wanted John dead, he had the opportunity to kill him instantly. He chose not to.”
“Tell me about John’s relationship with Beth.”
“When John stopped Mitchell’s attack on Beth, they were sharing an apartment.” Caitlin pulled a copy of a report from the file.
“He left John alive for a reason— to punish him, maybe, because Beth preferred him. If he kills Beth, she can’t want anyone else. And O’Reilly has to live with the aftermath.”
And John had perpetrated the lie as well. He’d never mentioned a romantic entanglement with his partner, either.
John had never said he loved her. He whispered how much he wanted her, how beautiful she was to him, but never that he loved her.
His lack of interest in their child. The forgotten doctor’s appointments. The nights she woke alone, to find him standing at the window, brooding and staring out at the waves.
“I’m in love with a man who loves another woman, and I’ve trapped him with a pregnancy. Oh my God.”
“I thought he was getting used to the idea, that he loved me and would love our baby. . . God, how could I not have seen this?”
“Why do you think I came down here? To keep her safe.”
“Mitchell believes his wife left him for you, doesn’t he?” “Yeah, he does. She left him because he was abusive, but it’s easier for him to blame me.”
“You love her, don’t you?”
“Were you sleeping with her, too?”
“Of course not.” That same harsh laugh escaped her, and she turned away. “If she was sleeping with you, you wouldn’t have needed me, would you? So were you thinking of her while you were with me?”
Relationship. Anything but. She’d been a convenient lay.
She could stand on her own; she didn’t need him. Lanie could take care of herself.
At least John hadn’t chosen Lanie because she looked like Beth. The bitter thought flitted through Lanie’s confused mind. Beth’s petite, curvy build was nothing like the tall, slender, athletic frame Lanie shared with her Falconetti cousins.
“I think the real question might be who matters more— your partner or the mother of your child?”
Shame burned along his skin. He’d failed her in so many ways, starting with the first time he touched her while still believing he loved another woman.
John tugged a hand through his hair and over his nape. “I. . . I’ll go up in a little while. I’m going to check in on Nicole and Beth.”
He wanted to shake her. “Not real? That’s funny. I could have sworn that was you with me that night in Atlantic City, screaming you loved me while we made love.”
“The reality is you left her as soon as she told you she was pregnant, if you were ever there to start with. Write her a child support check every month and get out of her life. You’ll be doing her a favor.”
The memory burned him with shame. She’d loved him, and he’d been too blind to see it.
March 11, 2022
4.5 Lanie and John Stars
I definitely felt the angst with this one. I devoured every page and stayed up way too late reading it. This may not be everyone's cup of tea , but for me it was the right amount of tension and drama at the right time.
Short review - unexpected pregnancy for a couple, both Detectives , who have been together for a relatively short time. Lanie Falconetti loves John O'Reilly. He's attracted to her and clearly cares for her but he believes himself to be in love with his work partner, Beth, who he slept with once a few years before.
Some truly heart wrenching scenes - I cried for Lanie.
Excellent attempts at redemption by John. Detective O'Reilly smashed my poor kindle heart but he absolutely did step up once he realised that Lanie was the one he was truly in love with.
Not safe for anyone who is not comfortable reading about emotional cheating because that is definitely a theme but that is resolved fairly early on in the book and I would say that the main body of the novel is about John trying to win Lanie back.
It wasn't a five star for me because the ending , although lovely , was a little abrupt. I wanted an epilogue.
More detailed review with spoilers...
Damn you Detective John O'Reilly... you robbed me of several hours of sleep and had me running on caffeine at work. I couldn't put this book down.
The start is definitely punchy and there is a scene early on when Lanie is sat with him in hospital because he has been hurt. John wakes up and makes a humdinger of a cock up....
John swam in a thick grayness, somewhere between light and dark. His body felt as though he should be in pain, but the sensation hovered just out of reach. The cold was real, and shivers racked him.
“John?” A lyrical voice soothed over his nerves, a familiar touch stroking his jaw. He turned toward the warmth. Lips brushed his.
“I love you.”
He struggled to open his eyes.
“Beth?”
Warm fingers linked through his.
“No, it’s me.”
Uh oh.
He doesn't help things at all when he and Lanie talk a little later...
“You love her, don’t you?” The quiet, deadly words brought him to a stop. For the first time, he glimpsed agony beneath the ice. Guilt cramped his stomach, and he softened his voice.
“Lanie, I didn’t mean for this to happen.”
“I’m sure you didn’t.” Her gaze didn’t move from his, but the existence of their unborn child hung between them, the double meaning heavy in her words.
“Were you sleeping with her, too?” Anger rocketed through his veins.
“No, damn it, I wasn’t sleeping with her.”
The secondary character I loved the most was Cait , Lanie's cousin. She is also in law enforcement and she has to question John about an event that happened. At this point she is all about protecting her cousin.
She scratched a note on the pad, and then her gaze flickered to his face.
“Were you involved?”
He shifted his gaze away. “That came later. Beth… She was scared and alone.”
“And you were her knight in shining armor.” Sarcasm clipped the words. John bristled.
“Are you always so antagonistic when questioning a witness?"
“O’Reilly, you haven’t seen antagonistic yet.”
Yesssss!!! You tell him Cait.
Lanie was a very likeable heroine. She's pretty badass and clearly had fallen hard for John. They connected physically from the start but he had not really engaged with the pregnancy at all , constantly distancing himself. Lanie is strong though and once she pushes him away she doesn't pull any punches about how she feels. I thought her struggle with bonding with the baby was well written. Towards the end I got a little frustrated that she was still pushing him away. He had redeemed himself but she still seemed so hesitant , right up until the end. Then again, a lot of women would possibly have never become involved with him again.
John was a well written Hero who evoked so many feelings. I got so mad with him and yet I also felt sorry for him plus he had lost both of his parents and I really sensed how alone he was in the world before Lanie. In terms of character development there is a lot going on. He also tugged my heartstrings when it came to him and his new baby boy.
The character I disliked intensely was Beth. (But I was probably supposed to). She got under my skin and the audacity of what she said to Lanie incensed me....I loved being incensed - The reader's fury at the other woman is a weird kind of deliciousness in romance. Both she and John had both lied to Lanie and others. I would have liked a clear scene of the door smacking Beth in the butt as she left their lives. It was obvious John was deeply in loved with Lanie by the end but I would have relished him telling Beth to go away.
This was a new to me author but I will definitely be reading more of her work.
HEA? Yes - but a little rushed and no epilogue.
Cheating? Emotional cheating.
Huge thanks to Lydia and Nicole for recommending this book.
I definitely felt the angst with this one. I devoured every page and stayed up way too late reading it. This may not be everyone's cup of tea , but for me it was the right amount of tension and drama at the right time.
Short review - unexpected pregnancy for a couple, both Detectives , who have been together for a relatively short time. Lanie Falconetti loves John O'Reilly. He's attracted to her and clearly cares for her but he believes himself to be in love with his work partner, Beth, who he slept with once a few years before.
Some truly heart wrenching scenes - I cried for Lanie.
Excellent attempts at redemption by John. Detective O'Reilly smashed my poor kindle heart but he absolutely did step up once he realised that Lanie was the one he was truly in love with.
Not safe for anyone who is not comfortable reading about emotional cheating because that is definitely a theme but that is resolved fairly early on in the book and I would say that the main body of the novel is about John trying to win Lanie back.
It wasn't a five star for me because the ending , although lovely , was a little abrupt. I wanted an epilogue.
More detailed review with spoilers...
Damn you Detective John O'Reilly... you robbed me of several hours of sleep and had me running on caffeine at work. I couldn't put this book down.
The start is definitely punchy and there is a scene early on when Lanie is sat with him in hospital because he has been hurt. John wakes up and makes a humdinger of a cock up....
John swam in a thick grayness, somewhere between light and dark. His body felt as though he should be in pain, but the sensation hovered just out of reach. The cold was real, and shivers racked him.
“John?” A lyrical voice soothed over his nerves, a familiar touch stroking his jaw. He turned toward the warmth. Lips brushed his.
“I love you.”
He struggled to open his eyes.
“Beth?”
Warm fingers linked through his.
“No, it’s me.”
Uh oh.
He doesn't help things at all when he and Lanie talk a little later...
“You love her, don’t you?” The quiet, deadly words brought him to a stop. For the first time, he glimpsed agony beneath the ice. Guilt cramped his stomach, and he softened his voice.
“Lanie, I didn’t mean for this to happen.”
“I’m sure you didn’t.” Her gaze didn’t move from his, but the existence of their unborn child hung between them, the double meaning heavy in her words.
“Were you sleeping with her, too?” Anger rocketed through his veins.
“No, damn it, I wasn’t sleeping with her.”
The secondary character I loved the most was Cait , Lanie's cousin. She is also in law enforcement and she has to question John about an event that happened. At this point she is all about protecting her cousin.
She scratched a note on the pad, and then her gaze flickered to his face.
“Were you involved?”
He shifted his gaze away. “That came later. Beth… She was scared and alone.”
“And you were her knight in shining armor.” Sarcasm clipped the words. John bristled.
“Are you always so antagonistic when questioning a witness?"
“O’Reilly, you haven’t seen antagonistic yet.”
Yesssss!!! You tell him Cait.
Lanie was a very likeable heroine. She's pretty badass and clearly had fallen hard for John. They connected physically from the start but he had not really engaged with the pregnancy at all , constantly distancing himself. Lanie is strong though and once she pushes him away she doesn't pull any punches about how she feels. I thought her struggle with bonding with the baby was well written. Towards the end I got a little frustrated that she was still pushing him away. He had redeemed himself but she still seemed so hesitant , right up until the end. Then again, a lot of women would possibly have never become involved with him again.
John was a well written Hero who evoked so many feelings. I got so mad with him and yet I also felt sorry for him plus he had lost both of his parents and I really sensed how alone he was in the world before Lanie. In terms of character development there is a lot going on. He also tugged my heartstrings when it came to him and his new baby boy.
The character I disliked intensely was Beth. (But I was probably supposed to). She got under my skin and the audacity of what she said to Lanie incensed me....I loved being incensed - The reader's fury at the other woman is a weird kind of deliciousness in romance. Both she and John had both lied to Lanie and others. I would have liked a clear scene of the door smacking Beth in the butt as she left their lives. It was obvious John was deeply in loved with Lanie by the end but I would have relished him telling Beth to go away.
This was a new to me author but I will definitely be reading more of her work.
HEA? Yes - but a little rushed and no epilogue.
Cheating? Emotional cheating.
Huge thanks to Lydia and Nicole for recommending this book.
August 26, 2017
I am confused about the book ratings. 3 or 3.5 or 4 stars.
I have lots to say, so let's start with it.
First, the Blurb was kinda misleading. The hero, John didn’t have to choose between his past and present.
John and Lanie both are police officers. Lanie and John are having an affair and Lanie is eight months pregnant. Well, there are things that Lanie doesn't know, things that John hasn't told her.
In the first two and three chapter, you will see Lanie is pregnant with John's child. So, he is trapped with Lanie and he kinda shows it. I want to kick his ass. How can he not love Lanie? Oh!! Yeah, he does love her and realized it after he ruined everything. That stupid bastard!!!
And after chapter six to the end, the book shows groveling of John. I have to say eighty percent of the book is based on John groveling.
The attraction, the overwhelming need he felt for Lanie – they had nothing to do with sexual fulfillment. He hadn’t been able to get enough of her because she’d filled the holes in his soul that being with Beth never had. clinging to his hopeless infatuation for Beth had been a futile effort at self-protection, keeping him from seeing how empty his life would be without Lanie.
Now he couldn’t miss it. He lived it, every second. The house echoed with her absence. At night, he woke and reached for her, his hand closing on vacant air. The heaviest emptiness lay in his heart.
While he was at it, he wished he’d had enough damn sense to know that Lanie was the women he loved and that he’d told her when she might have believed him.
Author, LW created some powerful emotional scenes through out the book and for that 3.5 stars will be justifiable.
I have lots to say, so let's start with it.
First, the Blurb was kinda misleading. The hero, John didn’t have to choose between his past and present.
John and Lanie both are police officers. Lanie and John are having an affair and Lanie is eight months pregnant. Well, there are things that Lanie doesn't know, things that John hasn't told her.
In the first two and three chapter, you will see Lanie is pregnant with John's child. So, he is trapped with Lanie and he kinda shows it. I want to kick his ass. How can he not love Lanie? Oh!! Yeah, he does love her and realized it after he ruined everything. That stupid bastard!!!
And after chapter six to the end, the book shows groveling of John. I have to say eighty percent of the book is based on John groveling.
The attraction, the overwhelming need he felt for Lanie – they had nothing to do with sexual fulfillment. He hadn’t been able to get enough of her because she’d filled the holes in his soul that being with Beth never had. clinging to his hopeless infatuation for Beth had been a futile effort at self-protection, keeping him from seeing how empty his life would be without Lanie.
Now he couldn’t miss it. He lived it, every second. The house echoed with her absence. At night, he woke and reached for her, his hand closing on vacant air. The heaviest emptiness lay in his heart.
While he was at it, he wished he’d had enough damn sense to know that Lanie was the women he loved and that he’d told her when she might have believed him.
Author, LW created some powerful emotional scenes through out the book and for that 3.5 stars will be justifiable.
February 1, 2022
Ahhh, NOW I remember why I read this one every few years:
SHE struggles to commit to HIM after he’s grovelled 😮
Our Laney has major issues and baggage so she digs her heels in 🙌 Atta girl.
I always re-read this book
Perhaps in the hope that maybe I missed how he fights for her
The wimp doesn’t grovel nearly enough but I enjoy the angst 🙄
SHE struggles to commit to HIM after he’s grovelled 😮
Our Laney has major issues and baggage so she digs her heels in 🙌 Atta girl.
I always re-read this book
Perhaps in the hope that maybe I missed how he fights for her
The wimp doesn’t grovel nearly enough but I enjoy the angst 🙄
May 3, 2020
OK read. The blurb is a bit misleading. He doesn’t really have to make a choice, and that situation is over quickly within the first 20% of the book. In a nutshell, he’s been in love with his partner Beth for years; I believe they only slept together once years ago, and she doesn’t feel the same way. He starts a “friends with benefits” relationship with Lanie, and she ends up pregnant. They live together, but aren’t really committed, neither is confessing love or sharing secrets. He’s a jerk for this part blowing off baby stuff, and getting shivers from Beth-ick; she has major commitment issues, and tells him no when he offers marriage, but for some reason she’s devastated when she finds out he still has feelings for Beth.
Maybe I’m desensitized from reading so many of these books, but he didn’t do anything that bad. There isn’t any cheating, and Beth isn’t perusing him. He was definitely an asshole, and I certainly wouldn’t had put up with his “Beth is perfect” attitude, but Lanie didn’t have any complaints at this point. This all happens super quick at the start, but their relationship isn’t described as anything deep, and mostly build on good sex. I think the “betrayal” would have been better sold, if they had a loving, committed relationship.
My issue, is that for the majority of the book she is pushing him away, and he’s kissing her ass, and it just droned on and on. The ending is rather abrupt; there isn’t an epilogue. Overall ok, I wish it would have been paced better so the last 80% wasn’t so slow. I can only listen to so much arguing.
P.S. Sonny Buck is like the worst name ever, and it looks like Caitlyn has a book. Hold On to Me
Maybe I’m desensitized from reading so many of these books, but he didn’t do anything that bad. There isn’t any cheating, and Beth isn’t perusing him. He was definitely an asshole, and I certainly wouldn’t had put up with his “Beth is perfect” attitude, but Lanie didn’t have any complaints at this point. This all happens super quick at the start, but their relationship isn’t described as anything deep, and mostly build on good sex. I think the “betrayal” would have been better sold, if they had a loving, committed relationship.
My issue, is that for the majority of the book she is pushing him away, and he’s kissing her ass, and it just droned on and on. The ending is rather abrupt; there isn’t an epilogue. Overall ok, I wish it would have been paced better so the last 80% wasn’t so slow. I can only listen to so much arguing.
P.S. Sonny Buck is like the worst name ever, and it looks like Caitlyn has a book. Hold On to Me
December 15, 2019
Well, my reading challenge has finished on a bit of a whimper and not a bang with this one. I read it a number of years ago and enjoyed it far more back then. Lanie annoyed me. OK, she was hard done by but, still, get the fuck out of here and stop with all the moaning. I guess I am getting a bit fussier in my reading habits. I don't hand out the four or five stars as often as I used to ... and I don't read feckin' 300 books in a year either. OMG, how did I even do that? I will definitely read more from this author. Overall, not a bad read!
... mussed dark hair, a shadow of stubble on his jaw, oft-washed Springsteen T-shirt, faded jeans with a hole in one pocket.
October 24, 2023
3.5 stars
I recall skim reading this book many years back and my general feeling was that the H did not grovel enough. Now as a more mature reader (hopefully) reading through the whole book, I have some mixed feelings about the whole story.
On the plus side, the book was well written, with the style reminiscent of the great Linda Howard, however with the angst and passion toned down. LW has a nice pen and the cop/Texan atmosphere she wove was convincing. The romance was slow burning and the trust issues faced by the main characters felt real. The tensed action chapters in the first quarter of the book were well done.
However, I felt underwhelmed by the way the story promised to be about the consequences of the H breaking the h's heart by entertaining secret, lingering feelings for his cop partner, when actually the majority of the book skipped addressing that very issue! Instead, the hurtful familial scars of both leads were used to explain why they both failed to really be committed before the truth (about the H's feelings for his colleague) came out. While the slow character growth of the H and h and how they learned to open themselves to each other were interesting to follow, I needed the bad blood about the H blindsiding the h for so long (by my estimates close to one year!) to be spilled in the open, along with all the angst pouring out. I got to witness the H, John's private epiphany about never really loving Beth (his colleague) and having been blind for so long about really being in love with the h, Lanie, but I missed having him confessing same in a long, articulate discourse to Lanie.
His grovel consisted of appreciable actions (being a good father, being helpful and patient while Lanie recovered) but I needed his words too, a long winded apology and confession. And he did not do any real wooing but instead dared to feel pissy when Lanie failed to let go of her anger in the face of his efforts (only two months of efforts vs his year long blindsiding!). I am guessing he is the archetype of Hs that were written in Contemprary Romance at the time (tongue-tied when it comes to feelings, ego-bound), but this does not console the romantic in me.
It made me pissy when the story made Lanie let go of her anger and give him a chance only because Beth warned her that if she continued to push him away, some other woman will be lucky to get him. Seriously 🙄? It all felt very adult and pragmatic, but for goodness' sake, this is a romance book!! Any woman who endured what Lanie did, and discovered the bitter truth the way she did, would need at the very least a full blown confrontation of what was and what wasn't before even agreeing to a truce!!
About the angst, I think that LW missed big opportunities to squeeze out the big drama. The non-linear storytelling of how their relationship was prior to the truth being uncovered failed in bringing in the gut punching effect of his blindsiding behaviour. For instance, we are told sparsely throughout the story by different characters that John deliberately missed many doctor's appointments and generally acted as if the baby was not a reality during Lanie's pregnancy but any hurt from this felt diluted because that very information was introduced too late and too briefly in the story. I wished the story had taken the time to show how they met, felt attraction, lived together, and how the h saw the little moments when the H was not fully into their relationship but consciously pushed aside any doubts, before the big moment came. Only then the longstanding anger and resentment of the h would have made more sense. Also, why would the story end as abruptly as that? After all the angst between them, didn't we deserve a proper epilogue of their HEA? I am guessing the abrupt style again reflects the CRs of its time 😔.
That said, with a romance with such tropes, did it feel, in the end, like Lanie was second best in John's affection? No, I believed in his feelings and intentions for Lanie. I believed in his epiphany. I believed in their childhood traumas and how it murkied their present. I just wished their reconciliation had unfolded in a more romantic manner. Despite its flaws, I still consider this book to be a worthy CR book, by now a classic must-read from the period it was written, as it remains I guess one of the good offers from then and it probably influenced the next generation of CR authors.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
June 10, 2013
I think that this book could have been really good, but it just didn't deliver. The backdrop of this story is John O'Reilly who has been having an intense sexual relationship with Lanie Falconetti, until the condom broke and now he's trapped. And he shows it.
Lanie, of course, is in love with John, but refuses to show her anger with his lack of attention because she has her own issues (i.e. her mother trapped her father into marriage with pregnancy so her father never loved her, and she refuses to be in the same situation).
John has his own issues because his father was also a cop, who died in the line of duty, then his mother married his father's ex-partner, who turns out to be a wife beater, and ultimately kills his mom. On top of this, somewhere along the way, he fell in love with his partner Beth, who was in an abusive relationship with a psycho maniac who is smart enough to beat all these cops and FBI agents.
So, against this backdrop of broken characters, you have John who just wanted sex from Lanie but is now trapped by a pregnancy he certainly does not want in any manner. Then there's Lanie who has blinders on her eyes about John's feelings and is so absorbed with the baby that she becomes even more blind.
As I think back on this book, I think what made me dislike it are the characters, none of whom I really liked, other than perhaps John and a side character Burnett.
The book really made you feel for John because his character was developed much better than Lanie's was. I understand how betrayed she must have felt, and that she wouldn't be thinking or acting rationally what with her pregnancy/birth hormones, plus the head injury that she sustained, but I just couldn't like her. She was hormonal, whiny, bitchy, moody, and just plain annoying. She had her own issues that she had never dealt with or shared, and yet she expected John to fix everything.
Beth, the supposed love of John's life, comes across as a queen B. Sorry, but that's how she seemed. She has to know that she messed up John's life, but does she care? No, she just yells at him then leaves. She also dares to talk to Lanie after everything Lanie had to go through because of Beth. Is Beth a victim? Sure, but she certainly is not a sympathetic one.
The other reason this book was a miss for me is that the ending and resolution did not come together well for me. One mintue Lanie is still telling John to get out of her life, and the next minute they are living happily ever after. No real sense of how Lanie got over her sense of betrayal and her trust issues. And without that struggle and character development, I felt no connection to Lanie, which means that I didn't care what happened to her.
Lanie, of course, is in love with John, but refuses to show her anger with his lack of attention because she has her own issues (i.e. her mother trapped her father into marriage with pregnancy so her father never loved her, and she refuses to be in the same situation).
John has his own issues because his father was also a cop, who died in the line of duty, then his mother married his father's ex-partner, who turns out to be a wife beater, and ultimately kills his mom. On top of this, somewhere along the way, he fell in love with his partner Beth, who was in an abusive relationship with a psycho maniac who is smart enough to beat all these cops and FBI agents.
So, against this backdrop of broken characters, you have John who just wanted sex from Lanie but is now trapped by a pregnancy he certainly does not want in any manner. Then there's Lanie who has blinders on her eyes about John's feelings and is so absorbed with the baby that she becomes even more blind.
As I think back on this book, I think what made me dislike it are the characters, none of whom I really liked, other than perhaps John and a side character Burnett.
The book really made you feel for John because his character was developed much better than Lanie's was. I understand how betrayed she must have felt, and that she wouldn't be thinking or acting rationally what with her pregnancy/birth hormones, plus the head injury that she sustained, but I just couldn't like her. She was hormonal, whiny, bitchy, moody, and just plain annoying. She had her own issues that she had never dealt with or shared, and yet she expected John to fix everything.
Beth, the supposed love of John's life, comes across as a queen B. Sorry, but that's how she seemed. She has to know that she messed up John's life, but does she care? No, she just yells at him then leaves. She also dares to talk to Lanie after everything Lanie had to go through because of Beth. Is Beth a victim? Sure, but she certainly is not a sympathetic one.
The other reason this book was a miss for me is that the ending and resolution did not come together well for me. One mintue Lanie is still telling John to get out of her life, and the next minute they are living happily ever after. No real sense of how Lanie got over her sense of betrayal and her trust issues. And without that struggle and character development, I felt no connection to Lanie, which means that I didn't care what happened to her.
August 1, 2016
CAN SHE FORGIVE HIM
Lanie and John are both police officers. They both love their jobs. They also live together and share a hot and. Passionate relationship.
But there are things that Lanie doesn't know, things that John hasn't told her. But everything is about to come out into the open with devastating consequences.
For years John has been in love with Beth, his partner at work. Beth is divorced from her crazy ex-husband. Beth does not return John feelings. But when her ex-husband comes after her and Lanie kidnapping them both, and demanding that John choose which one lives and which one dies. It's then that Lanie realises she's been living a lie.
I found this in my local charity shop, not having read anything by this author before I decided to give it a go. The book started out strongly, with plenty of action and drama. But then it settled into a rather repetitive pattern. Some reviewers have said that they found Lanie whiny. I have to say that she did come across like that at times. But that's probably because the author failed after the initial opening chapters to give the story any positive direction. Whereas really we should all be applauding Lanie for being strong and standing up to John who had deceived her. They were not as the blurb suggests having a no strings affair. They were in a commited relationship, living together, and expecting their first child. For Lanie to find out that in all this time John was in love with another woman. Quite frankly it made a pleasant change to get a heroine with a backbone. I thought that Lanie and John's back stories were a bit contrived so that they neatly fitted in with what was happening in the main plot. But this was an okay read.
Lanie and John are both police officers. They both love their jobs. They also live together and share a hot and. Passionate relationship.
But there are things that Lanie doesn't know, things that John hasn't told her. But everything is about to come out into the open with devastating consequences.
For years John has been in love with Beth, his partner at work. Beth is divorced from her crazy ex-husband. Beth does not return John feelings. But when her ex-husband comes after her and Lanie kidnapping them both, and demanding that John choose which one lives and which one dies. It's then that Lanie realises she's been living a lie.
I found this in my local charity shop, not having read anything by this author before I decided to give it a go. The book started out strongly, with plenty of action and drama. But then it settled into a rather repetitive pattern. Some reviewers have said that they found Lanie whiny. I have to say that she did come across like that at times. But that's probably because the author failed after the initial opening chapters to give the story any positive direction. Whereas really we should all be applauding Lanie for being strong and standing up to John who had deceived her. They were not as the blurb suggests having a no strings affair. They were in a commited relationship, living together, and expecting their first child. For Lanie to find out that in all this time John was in love with another woman. Quite frankly it made a pleasant change to get a heroine with a backbone. I thought that Lanie and John's back stories were a bit contrived so that they neatly fitted in with what was happening in the main plot. But this was an okay read.
March 12, 2022
Reread 3/12/2022
It takes her near death and almost losing the baby to get his act together, which actually works. What doesn’t work? Their confrontations last to the very end of the book.
3 they finally find their HEA stars
It takes her near death and almost losing the baby to get his act together, which actually works. What doesn’t work? Their confrontations last to the very end of the book.
3 they finally find their HEA stars
May 23, 2011
Oh my gawd. I absolutely loved it! This is my first book by Linda Winfree and her story telling ability just blows me away.
A story about a man coming to terms with being in love with his baby mama a moment too late.
I will definitely dive into book #1 of the Hearts of the South series next.
A story about a man coming to terms with being in love with his baby mama a moment too late.
I will definitely dive into book #1 of the Hearts of the South series next.
March 31, 2018
Oh my gosh, what an angst fest!!
But wait... misleading blurb alert! Tom isn't really forced to choose 'what matters most'. His realization comes to him more as a belated result of his poor choices. To little to late??
It isn't really 4 stars for me but I really did enjoy most of it even if it ended on a bit of a fizzle.
And Beth... Gah! Where to start with that sanctimonious know-it-all liar. Sheesh!
But I digress.
Tom and Lanie are two police officers who have been together for the better part of the year and now live together. She is 8 months pregnant with his child. (an oops with a condom). Does he care? Not really. He misses all the doctor appointments and hasn't even considered baby names yet or helped with decorating the baby room.
Why is this? Well, Tom and his partner Beth harbour secrets... potentially love killing secrets if not outright killing secrets.
All the set up for the angst happens in the first third or so. And it is pretty damning for Tom. But Lanie is NOT a doormat!
Grievously injured, Lanie must recover in a world where everything is taken from her and she cannot rely on her so-called-love; Tom.
Tom, of course, realizes too late that he loved Lanie (she is 'what matters most'), and now how will she ever believe him?
It's a long haul for Tom and to be fair, they both have baggage from their childhoods that makes trust difficult. Stories they have yet to share with each other. Over two months Lanie slowly heals. Their baby is the glue that holds them together for much of that.
I really felt Tom's change from the unfeeling lover to the devoted father and forlorn ex-lover.
Lanie was magnificent in her righteous anger!
There is a big turning point around 80% where the author loses me for a while
The wrap up was a little too quick after all the long slog through the aftermath, but Tom really does manage to dig himself out of his hole.
Will probably go back and revisit this in future ; )
But wait... misleading blurb alert! Tom isn't really forced to choose 'what matters most'. His realization comes to him more as a belated result of his poor choices. To little to late??
It isn't really 4 stars for me but I really did enjoy most of it even if it ended on a bit of a fizzle.
And Beth... Gah! Where to start with that sanctimonious know-it-all liar. Sheesh!
But I digress.
Tom and Lanie are two police officers who have been together for the better part of the year and now live together. She is 8 months pregnant with his child. (an oops with a condom). Does he care? Not really. He misses all the doctor appointments and hasn't even considered baby names yet or helped with decorating the baby room.
Why is this? Well, Tom and his partner Beth harbour secrets... potentially love killing secrets if not outright killing secrets.
All the set up for the angst happens in the first third or so. And it is pretty damning for Tom. But Lanie is NOT a doormat!
Grievously injured, Lanie must recover in a world where everything is taken from her and she cannot rely on her so-called-love; Tom.
Tom, of course, realizes too late that he loved Lanie (she is 'what matters most'), and now how will she ever believe him?
It's a long haul for Tom and to be fair, they both have baggage from their childhoods that makes trust difficult. Stories they have yet to share with each other. Over two months Lanie slowly heals. Their baby is the glue that holds them together for much of that.
I really felt Tom's change from the unfeeling lover to the devoted father and forlorn ex-lover.
Lanie was magnificent in her righteous anger!
There is a big turning point around 80% where the author loses me for a while
The wrap up was a little too quick after all the long slog through the aftermath, but Tom really does manage to dig himself out of his hole.
Will probably go back and revisit this in future ; )
April 5, 2010
John and Lanie. Two people who lived together, great sexual chemistry, an unplanned pregnancy, his conflicted feelings over his childhood and his emotions towards his partner and former lover, Beth (which was not known to Lanie). Beth considered him a good friend but did not and had never really loved him. John just happened to be there for her during her transition from an abusive marriage. A jealous ex husband who pops up and kidnaps both women and tries to force John to choose which one is more important. In the aftermath there is MUCH pain and betrayal and mistrust due to the fact Lanie was kept in the dark on so many things, almost lost the baby, had a brain injury, and could never trust what John was feeling or who he was thinking about. CAN'T BLAME HER THERE!!! He was completely UNpresent during the whole pregnancy and never invested himself in their relationship beyond sex. Tricked himself in to thinking he had true feelings for his ex-lover and current homicide partner. Obviously his feelings were misplaced due to his other "issues".
Let me just say this was a very LONG and painful journey. Does John come to his senses and realize his error and how much he loves Lanie? YES. Does he become father of the year and try his damndest to win her back? YES. But she does not make it easy on him and it's understandable but very agonizing for both of them. It was a tough read. I was hurting and frustrated through most of the book because they could never really communicate. They kept shutting each other up. That doesn't really happen in real life. Typically not much time goes by before any of us would really sit down and hash things out. Whether it works out in life is never for sure but at least there is an attempt at a full explanation. John was extremely loving and romantic and a totally tortured soul. I felt for both him and Lanie. I would have felt just as angry and betrayed as her too. Not sure how long it would take for me to feel secure again either.
All in all I liked this story and was very moved by it. If my review sounds a little frustrated and weak its because it was a fairly long story and all but the last few pages were of them in conflict. Can't we ever get like one full chapter in the end of such a painful story showing their new and happy life together??? It was tough to ride out the entire journey with them and cry tears with the characters and then see them figure it out in the last three pages. That part is tough. We get drawn in and we get invested, and then we get let off the ride super quick. LOVE the story, had a hard time with the quick resolution.
Let me just say this was a very LONG and painful journey. Does John come to his senses and realize his error and how much he loves Lanie? YES. Does he become father of the year and try his damndest to win her back? YES. But she does not make it easy on him and it's understandable but very agonizing for both of them. It was a tough read. I was hurting and frustrated through most of the book because they could never really communicate. They kept shutting each other up. That doesn't really happen in real life. Typically not much time goes by before any of us would really sit down and hash things out. Whether it works out in life is never for sure but at least there is an attempt at a full explanation. John was extremely loving and romantic and a totally tortured soul. I felt for both him and Lanie. I would have felt just as angry and betrayed as her too. Not sure how long it would take for me to feel secure again either.
All in all I liked this story and was very moved by it. If my review sounds a little frustrated and weak its because it was a fairly long story and all but the last few pages were of them in conflict. Can't we ever get like one full chapter in the end of such a painful story showing their new and happy life together??? It was tough to ride out the entire journey with them and cry tears with the characters and then see them figure it out in the last three pages. That part is tough. We get drawn in and we get invested, and then we get let off the ride super quick. LOVE the story, had a hard time with the quick resolution.
May 24, 2023
Very Torn Between Two Lovers
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w1F5B...
with a little Madonna/whore complex tossed in.
Hero doesn't know what he wants and woos the heroine with emotional blackmail when she doesn't cave to the sacrifice he's making by choosing her
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w1F5B...
with a little Madonna/whore complex tossed in.
Hero doesn't know what he wants and woos the heroine with emotional blackmail when she doesn't cave to the sacrifice he's making by choosing her
August 29, 2011
The blurb for What Mattered Most is outstanding. One of the most enticing "I have to get this book" blurbs I've ever read. It lured me in, I started reading the book and about 1/4 of the way into it I re-read the blurb and felt like I was duped. The description of "he has to choose between the woman he has hopelessly loved forever and the woman who is carrying his child". Right there, wow that's a strong statement, too bad the actual event doesn't live up to those words.
I have to say that I did for the most part enjoy Ms Winfree's book, I would probably read her work again, I just felt that in this instance the suspense and the delivery of this particular story fell far short of what I was hoping for and expecting. The supposed "choice" John has to make between his child's mother and un-requited love is really not a choice at all. He made an error in judgement and didn't share info with Lanie which put her in danger. His realization of loving Lanie instead of Beth occurs within a couple sentences. There was no big build up to his discovery, there was no "Eureka!!!!" moment, it was just kind of "hey I guess I love the woman who had my son, and never really did love Beth". And the same for Lanie realizing John was in love with Beth and not so much her, it occurred so quickly and in such a blase' manner I thought I missed a page. More than 80% of the book is John pining for Lanie and her resisting him.
In the end for what this story was I did like it. I was simply disappointed in the fact that I was expecting a steamy, suspenseful love triangle and when the realization hit that wasn't what I was going to get I was a bit disgruntled.
I have to say that I did for the most part enjoy Ms Winfree's book, I would probably read her work again, I just felt that in this instance the suspense and the delivery of this particular story fell far short of what I was hoping for and expecting. The supposed "choice" John has to make between his child's mother and un-requited love is really not a choice at all. He made an error in judgement and didn't share info with Lanie which put her in danger. His realization of loving Lanie instead of Beth occurs within a couple sentences. There was no big build up to his discovery, there was no "Eureka!!!!" moment, it was just kind of "hey I guess I love the woman who had my son, and never really did love Beth". And the same for Lanie realizing John was in love with Beth and not so much her, it occurred so quickly and in such a blase' manner I thought I missed a page. More than 80% of the book is John pining for Lanie and her resisting him.
In the end for what this story was I did like it. I was simply disappointed in the fact that I was expecting a steamy, suspenseful love triangle and when the realization hit that wasn't what I was going to get I was a bit disgruntled.
June 25, 2019
Couldn't stand John. What a jerk. He starts a relationship with Lanie, using her as a substitute for the girl he really loves, gets her pregnant and completely ignores the baby, acting as if the baby doesn't exists. He let's Lanie believe that he loves her and hangs out with the ex he's actually in love with a lot and doesn't tell Lanie about his previous relationship with said ex.
Only when Lanie is lying on a hospital bed (completely his fault) and his baby is delivered in an emergency surgery that he realises that he actually does love Lanie.
Why didn't Lanie think of that earlier?
All she had to do was almost die for John to show her and her child any interest. Simple.
Then, after holding his child (the one he previously ignored existence of) he magically falls in love with son. Yay.
I stopped reading because I knew eventually Lanie would forgive John. Sure, it wouldn't be quick or easy. Or painful. But it wouldn't have been painful enough for me.
John deserves for Lanie to walk out on him with her son and only be allowed court visits, where he sees Lanie move on with another (obviously better) guy. To me, that would be a happy ending.
Only when Lanie is lying on a hospital bed (completely his fault) and his baby is delivered in an emergency surgery that he realises that he actually does love Lanie.
Why didn't Lanie think of that earlier?
All she had to do was almost die for John to show her and her child any interest. Simple.
Then, after holding his child (the one he previously ignored existence of) he magically falls in love with son. Yay.
I stopped reading because I knew eventually Lanie would forgive John. Sure, it wouldn't be quick or easy. Or painful. But it wouldn't have been painful enough for me.
John deserves for Lanie to walk out on him with her son and only be allowed court visits, where he sees Lanie move on with another (obviously better) guy. To me, that would be a happy ending.
May 12, 2012
This was an emotional cheating story,it had me gripped from start till the end,Lanie such a strong woman,she suffered so much pain from two most important men in her life-father and now John.John was involved with Lanie and they were going to have a baby but he had feelings for Beth which he kept from Lanie,she thought she loved John and John loved her now they were going to have a boy,they will happy but then everything came crashing down.John realizes his mistake and regrets it even know may be he has lost Lanie forever but he still fights it- for their child,their love and for himself.
The story progressed really well,John who was not at all ready to come to terms that he is about to be a father and tries to be in denial but then he overcomes his denials and fears and becomes a very good father also working on to win Lanie back and show her he is a changed guy now.Lanie fights her fears and insecurities,finally after many hurdles they both manage to have their HEA.
Overall a good read.
Recommend it.
PS:Thanks Dinjolina for this recommendation*Hugs*
The story progressed really well,John who was not at all ready to come to terms that he is about to be a father and tries to be in denial but then he overcomes his denials and fears and becomes a very good father also working on to win Lanie back and show her he is a changed guy now.Lanie fights her fears and insecurities,finally after many hurdles they both manage to have their HEA.
Overall a good read.
Recommend it.
PS:Thanks Dinjolina for this recommendation*Hugs*
June 28, 2021
I expected this to be a story where the hero betrayed the heroine, a story full of angst and a wronged heroine you rooted for. This book was so not that. Instead what I got was a hero who didn’t do anything that bad, an annoying, bitchy heroine I honestly couldn’t stand, and a baby who conveniently slept whenever the hero and heroine wanted to get it on.
April 12, 2015
* available on ScribD at time of reading
I was pleasantly surprised how I liked this book. This was quite angsty. Homicide detective John thought he was in love with his partner, Beth, though he was having a sexual relationship with Lanie who happened to be pregnant with his child. It was shown early on, that though John is supportive of the pregnancy he is not very enthusiastic like failing to show up for doctor's checkups and putting together the crib. Something happens that put the two women in danger and John is faced with what Lanie really means to him. However, while he was coming to terms with his feelings, Lanie found out that John lied to her about his feelings for Beth. Because of what happened to her mother, she decided she wasn't going to be with a man who feels obligated to stay because of the baby. What follows was almost an entire book of John trying to prove that he loves Lanie and wants a life with her. It wasn't easy because Lanie was also dealing with post-partum depression as well as other problems.
My only complaint was that it ended abruptly when Lanie finally accepted that John really loved her. I'm not fully convinced she will not freak out and push him away again.
I was pleasantly surprised how I liked this book. This was quite angsty. Homicide detective John thought he was in love with his partner, Beth, though he was having a sexual relationship with Lanie who happened to be pregnant with his child. It was shown early on, that though John is supportive of the pregnancy he is not very enthusiastic like failing to show up for doctor's checkups and putting together the crib. Something happens that put the two women in danger and John is faced with what Lanie really means to him. However, while he was coming to terms with his feelings, Lanie found out that John lied to her about his feelings for Beth. Because of what happened to her mother, she decided she wasn't going to be with a man who feels obligated to stay because of the baby. What follows was almost an entire book of John trying to prove that he loves Lanie and wants a life with her. It wasn't easy because Lanie was also dealing with post-partum depression as well as other problems.
My only complaint was that it ended abruptly when Lanie finally accepted that John really loved her. I'm not fully convinced she will not freak out and push him away again.
July 11, 2014
More of an emotional, tear jerker read. I thought it would be more of a romantic suspense but the suspense all happened pretty early in the story. Still it was a good solid read.
May 28, 2017
Lainie and John are cops who are in a relationship that is more than friends with benefits but less that totally committed. It is great sex with a side order to casual coupledom and mutual respect.
But the condom broke and Lainie is pregnant and John is.... well, John is a little freaked. He's not ready for parenthood.
Added to their own romantic drama is the fact that John has some residual feelings for his ex-partner, Beth. John had been in unrequited love with Beth for years and has been a support for Beth in the aftermath of her divorce from her crazy, wife abusing ex-husband. But Beth has never felt anything for John and he moved on with Lainie.
Past and present converge when Beth's crazy ex-husband decides to kidnap both women and have John choose which one he will save: The woman he really loves (Beth) or the pregnant mother of his child (Lainie).
Truthfully, that dilemma doesn't take of a lot of book real estate as it is resolved rather quickly. Its importance lies in Lainie finding out that John had feelings for Beth (which she hadn't known before) and feeling betrayed.
On the one hand I felt for Lainie because the fact that John had been in love with (and probably still had some lingering feelings for ) Beth came to her during a period when she was feeling the most scared and vulnerable and not from John himself.
On the other hand, I got over Lainie's issues real quick because she gave the matter a lot more head space than I think it merited. Her relationship with John was a separate issue than his past -- whatever -- he had with Beth. For one thing he and Beth never actually had anything outside of his mind. And for another, her reaction borders on not understanding that it is possible for the current man in her life could have loved someone prior to meeting her.
I mean, she had every right to feel some type of way about the whole situation, but it bled into areas that felt excessive and went on too long for me. So I just really needed her to put on her big girl panties and work through her shit a lot sooner than she did. She wallowed. There was no need for that. Especially since John did put his big boy pants on and stepped up big league in the role of expectant father and did some soul searching and some hard-truthing.
Overall a good soapy drama that fills a hits squarely inside my "soapy drama" reading need I sometimes get.
But the condom broke and Lainie is pregnant and John is.... well, John is a little freaked. He's not ready for parenthood.
Added to their own romantic drama is the fact that John has some residual feelings for his ex-partner, Beth. John had been in unrequited love with Beth for years and has been a support for Beth in the aftermath of her divorce from her crazy, wife abusing ex-husband. But Beth has never felt anything for John and he moved on with Lainie.
Past and present converge when Beth's crazy ex-husband decides to kidnap both women and have John choose which one he will save: The woman he really loves (Beth) or the pregnant mother of his child (Lainie).
Truthfully, that dilemma doesn't take of a lot of book real estate as it is resolved rather quickly. Its importance lies in Lainie finding out that John had feelings for Beth (which she hadn't known before) and feeling betrayed.
On the one hand I felt for Lainie because the fact that John had been in love with (and probably still had some lingering feelings for ) Beth came to her during a period when she was feeling the most scared and vulnerable and not from John himself.
On the other hand, I got over Lainie's issues real quick because she gave the matter a lot more head space than I think it merited. Her relationship with John was a separate issue than his past -- whatever -- he had with Beth. For one thing he and Beth never actually had anything outside of his mind. And for another, her reaction borders on not understanding that it is possible for the current man in her life could have loved someone prior to meeting her.
I mean, she had every right to feel some type of way about the whole situation, but it bled into areas that felt excessive and went on too long for me. So I just really needed her to put on her big girl panties and work through her shit a lot sooner than she did. She wallowed. There was no need for that. Especially since John did put his big boy pants on and stepped up big league in the role of expectant father and did some soul searching and some hard-truthing.
Overall a good soapy drama that fills a hits squarely inside my "soapy drama" reading need I sometimes get.
April 25, 2021
*** Book Q & A***
* How did the book make you feel?: It delivered on angst initially but the separation was drawn out.
* How do you feel about how the story was told?: We meet the MC’s and the H is taking the pregnant h for granted and still pining over OW. The h is inadvertently put in danger and the H realizes what he almost lost. I enjoyed the first 50% of the story but the separation was drawn out.
* What did you think about the main characters?: John really had his head up his butt until he realized what he had. The h was a bit too unforgiving for the last half of the book for me. She had a reason to feel betrayed, but she was also dependent on the H because she was unwell so I didn’t understand why she was so steadfastly dismissive.
* Which parts of the book stood out to you?: The effort John made to to make amends was remarkable.
* What themes/tropes did you detect in the story?: Surprise baby, OW drama, H reluctant to fall in love
* What did you think about the ending?: It was very drawn out and the drama became redundant. I didn’t like the meddling OW.
* What is your impression of the author?: I enjoy this author’s writing style.
* How did the book make you feel?: It delivered on angst initially but the separation was drawn out.
* How do you feel about how the story was told?: We meet the MC’s and the H is taking the pregnant h for granted and still pining over OW. The h is inadvertently put in danger and the H realizes what he almost lost. I enjoyed the first 50% of the story but the separation was drawn out.
* What did you think about the main characters?: John really had his head up his butt until he realized what he had. The h was a bit too unforgiving for the last half of the book for me. She had a reason to feel betrayed, but she was also dependent on the H because she was unwell so I didn’t understand why she was so steadfastly dismissive.
* Which parts of the book stood out to you?: The effort John made to to make amends was remarkable.
* What themes/tropes did you detect in the story?: Surprise baby, OW drama, H reluctant to fall in love
* What did you think about the ending?: It was very drawn out and the drama became redundant. I didn’t like the meddling OW.
* What is your impression of the author?: I enjoy this author’s writing style.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
maybe
July 7, 2024Read when I want a rage/hate read
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