Not Funny: Essays on Life, Comedy, Culture, Et Cetera

by Jena Friedman

For fans of the perceptive comedy of Hannah Gadsby, Lindy West, and Sarah Silverman, Academy Award–nominated and acclaimed stand-up comedian Jena Friedman presents a witty and insightful collection of essays on the cultural flashpoints of today.

Growing up, Jena Friedman didn’t care about being likable. And she never wanted to be a comedian, either. A child of the 90s, she wouldn’t discover her knack for the funny business until research for her college thesis led her to take an improv class in Chicago.

That anthropology paper, written on race, class, and gender in the city’s comedy scene, was, in Jena’s own words, “just as funny as it sounds.” But it did lay the groundwork for a career that has seen her write and produce for The Daily Show with Jon Stewart , the Late Show with David Letterman , and the Oscar nominated Borat Subsequent Moviefilm .

Friedman’s debut collection, Not Funny , takes on the third rails of modern life in Jena’s bold and subversive style, with essays that explore cancel culture, sexism, work, celebrity worship, and…dead baby jokes.

In a moment where women’s rights are being rolled back, fascism is on the rise, and so many of us could use a breather as we struggle to get by, Jena applies her unique gifts to pull a laugh from things deemed too raw, too precious, and too scary to joke about. She shares her stories of taking on those who told her she was too brash, too edgy, and too “unlikable” to make it. She deftly dissects how we get coerced into silence on the issues that matter most, until they’ve gone too far afield to be turned back around again. And she shares her struggles to make it (-ish) in a world that, more often than not, would rather tune out than listen to a woman confronting the indignities we’ve been told to bear.

Genres: Humor, Nonfiction, Memoir, Essays, Audiobook, Comedy, Feminism

256 pages, Hardcover

First published April 18, 2023

Reviews

[Sherwood Smith]

Years ago I used to do copy-edit and retyping for people who could afford to have that grinding work done for them. Mostly non-writers. Two of these projects were memoirs by male comedians. They ended up being far less funny than angry. When this came up at NetGalley I thought, ooh, that rare bird, a female comedian. This should be interesting, and light-hearted reading late at night. I should have known better!

There's a lot of anger underneath these various essays, which are less funny than enlightening about the tough uphill climb for women in comedy. Enlightening and hard-hitting as Friedman tackles not only the unfunny questions female comedians get, but she takes on the tough road for female actors being cast in male-gazey films by male filmmakers (sex scenes, skin scenes). She gets into #MeToo, a subject that no one articulated during the years I worked under the glass ceiling in the film industry, but wow did that subject saturate the air. And there are women-adjacent subjects such as dead baby jokes, and suchlike, which I don't find even remotely funny.

These essays are unflinching, very political, and convey a straightforward view of what it was like for this woman to make her way into the strange world of comedy. Funny? Look at the title; though she snaps off the occasional great line, you're not going to chuckle your way through this book.

[Cari · Rating 5 out of 5]

Friedman is a comic who has experienced all sorts of misogyny in the stand-up world. This is black humor at its finest - the darkness apparent in the "dead baby jokes" Friedman writes about in one essay. It's also a skewering of this industry/profession and illustrates the need to do better - not just in the comedy world but in society in general. A must-read for feminists and those who enjoy Lindy West and Roxane Gay.

[Mark Fajet · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was so good. It was such a five star book that I went back and changed a different five star rating to 4 stars because I was reading this and thought “now this is what reading a five star book feels like”

[Brianna · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'll be honest, I wasn't familiar with Jena Friedman before reading this book, but I was intrigued by the book summary, so I went into it expecting to laugh and enjoy a comedic-themed essay collection, but I got so much more. Friedman is a whip smart feminist that is well spoken on topics like abortion, privilege, discrimination, and more. She's found really clever ways to weave important hot button issues into her comedy and writing and I found myself nodding and wholeheartedly agreeing with her all the way through. I breezed through this collection of essays and found it hard to put down. If you like The Daily Show, chances are high you're going to enjoy this book.

Thank you to the publisher for an advanced reader copy in exchange for an honest review.

[Hein Matthew Hattie · Rating 1 out of 5]

DNF / abandoned p 76. Average comedian memoir-in-essays. Author seems like a cool, smart, funny person. The prose lacks style.

[Richard Propes · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you pick up Academy Award nominee Jena Friedman's "Not Funny: Essays on Life, Comedy, Culture, Et Cetera" solely because you expect the book to be yet another hilarious collection of essays written by an American comedian, there's a pretty good chance you'll be at least a little disappointed.

This isn't because "Not Funny" isn't funny. "Not Funny" is funny. However, if you know truly know Friedman's work then you already know that Friedman seldom stops at funny.

"Not Funny" definitely doesn't stop at funny as Friedman's essays on life, comedy, and culture tackle everything from reproductive rights to gender, privilege, class, #MeToo, and the world of celebrity culture. Hilarious, uncompromising, occasionally squirm-inducing, and remarkably honest, "Not Funny" is fierce, bold, and uniquely thought-provoking.

In 2020, Friedman picked up an Academy Award nomination for her screenplay work on Borat Subsequent MovieFilm. It's the latest accolade for the acclaimed standup comedian and writer who seems as much at ease whether working on or offstage. She appeared in the Sundance flick "Palm Springs," a must-see if you haven't, and her latest comedy special "Ladykiller" premiered on Peacock in September 2022 with the then pregnant Friedman delivering some of her finest, most pointed humor and insights to date with a relentless yet compelling fury that will likely offend those who deserve to be offended.

While "Not Funny" has its share of humor, Friedman is perhaps at her very best when sharing her experiences in the comedy world that range from inspirational to the downright misogynistic. Friedman's writing is often so introspective that "Not Funny" carries with it an emotional resonance that makes even her darkest humor land and her most biting commentary 100% penetrate. By the end of "Not Funny," I truthfully didn't know whether I should laugh or cry.

The truth is that I did both in abundance throughout "Not Funny."

[Sharon L · Rating 1 out of 5]

If she was trying to be funny at all in the first five minutes of the book she wasn’t. Then she went into politics. I don’t think “ entertainers “ realize that when people are trying to escape and look for something funny to read, they don’t need to read about politics. We don’t need to know your opinion. We don’t care what you think about partisan issues. You are supposed to make us laugh. After all, you are a comedian? Don’t waste your time with this book. It spews ignorance and hate and rarely makes you laugh.

[Elaina Heikes · Rating 3 out of 5]

Just finished Not Funny - the chapter where she interviewed male comedians with questions that female comedians have gotten in the past was the best part. Overall, it got me curious about her work - I often feel like comedians (more specifically, male comedians) are just doing comedy because it’s fun for them, but Jena’s making social change through a comedic lens. Cool!

[Laura Hobbs · Rating 1 out of 5]

Not funny. While I started with the audio version thinking it would be fun like her Colbert interview, her reading was poor and stilted. So I switched to the Kindle version. Still not funny. Gave up 10% into the book; moving on to more interesting things.

[Colleen Dempsey · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fresh and culturally relevant, and interesting because I don’t know much about the comedy world. Lot of musings about being female in a male field. Lots of Chicago references! Lots of political commentary. 4.5 stars I’ll round up to 5.

[Donna · Rating 1 out of 5]

She’s right. This book is not funny. DNF

[Alger Smythe-Hopkins · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was not a book that I began with any expectations beyond what was on the cover, so this was a memoir that simply blew me away.

Aside from Friedman's remarkable authorial voice, the overall arc of the book builds towards a convincing portrait of a subculture coming to grips with its structural sexism. In one of the later chapters, Friedman does the near impossible and convinces me that Jon Stewart has opinions worth listening to , Stewart had his time and his reign at The Daily Show had many highlights, but they rarely included Jon himself who became increasingly careful of his personal brand as the series aged. Rather than taking more risks as his profile grew, he peaked with telling Tucker Carlson that he was hurting America, then declined to writing America (The Book), a cynical per-retirement cash grab.
This is a funny book, but more critically, on every level, this is a serious book. The chapters each include some moment, some incident, some observation that sticks in the mind, that needs chewing over, that shines a light on just how normal it is for a comedian (who is female) to be thwarted just because of who they are. Friedman is thoughtful on her experiences, and insightful. So much of what she describes is awkward enough that it would be taken as hyperbole were it not so immediately recognizable when it's pointed out to us.
This is an important book that deserves a wide audience.

[Gordon G · Rating 3 out of 5]

Enjoyable, I wanted to hear more about Jena Friedman's political comedy writing career after first seeing the amazing but short lived "Soft Focus with Jena Friedman" show on Adult Swim in 2019. She does end up sharing more background info on that show and how they had shot way more episodes that were unfortunately deemed too risky to air for even the Adult Swim execs, but her John McAfee interview will always be top tier. I think my favorite section was the "dead babies" chapter along with her American Girl satirical play. The only "skippable" chapter was the one where she read all of her written sex advice columns from a time when she was doing some extra paid gig work at a magazine. I can understand why she added this section just as a way to archive a part of her comedy career that likely went unnoticed and unappreciated, since magazines are essentially a dead medium at that point in time, but it wasn't too funny to hear more than three of them, let alone 15 or however many were read in that section.

[Dylan | itsthelymanlibrary · Rating 4 out of 5]

This essay collection totally took me off guard. Jena is not someone I knew anything about. She is unapologetically anti-Trump and pro-choice and it’s endearing just how unwilling she is to pretend to be anyone else. I really enjoyed learning about what it’s like working in comedy, and considering what it actually is like working in a field where there is no HR. I loved the audiobook and would recommend it!

[Linda · Rating 3 out of 5]

I saw her on Colbert's show. I didn't really know or recognize her, but I thought I'd give the book a try when I saw it was available through my library.
Someone else marked this book as humor which I didn't really pick up on. It seems to me more her journey (and therefore, a partially how-to) of breaking into comedy. It isn't easy and it generally won't pay the bills.
A lot of name dropping. Valid points.

[Jordan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Jena has been all over my TikTok FYP, so when I saw that she had a book coming up, I jumped at the chance to read it and see if it would be a good fit for my wee store.

This book, despite the title, includes funny and frank discussions about comedy, the misogyny she's experienced, the infuriation of being asked about the bad behavior of men in her industry more than anything else, about privilege, and about using comedy in an overtly political way. She proves that comedy can be edge and actually not harmful or punching down. (For example, I used to think comedians should never have material about rape, but I just needed some women to add some material.) Not Funny is part memoir, part social commentary. She talks about her journey to now, with a background in improv, working on The Daily Show, working in standup. She also does some straightforward grappling with having had a good relationship with someone who later was fired for allegations against them (Jeff Garlin).

A great companion to the documentary Hysterical on Hulu, this is a must-read for anyone interested in comedy or supporting comedians.

cw: sexual assault/harassment, rape, abortion, racism, statutory/CSA, misogyny

[Tracy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Funny.

[Kaitlin Huntington · Rating 1 out of 5]

Started it, couldn’t finish. Not my jam I guess?

[Caitie Vondras]

DNF @ 20% - largely lived up to its name, and unfortunately other redeeming qualities could not be found.

[Matt · Rating 5 out of 5]

The "Brief Interviews with Hilarious Men" essay alone is worth the price of admission.

[Chris · Rating 2 out of 5]

I’d call this closest to a memoir in content and some of her background is interesting so if you’re a Friedman fan, go for it, but I think it falls into the too-young-to-write-a-memoir trap and know that there isn’t anything on “Borat: Subsequent Moviefilm” due to NDA restrictions.

[Adam Dolin · Rating 5 out of 5]

An important read for men in creative industries

There are important lessons in here for men in male-dominated spaces. Jena is able to teach them through whip-smart humor and entertaining industry anecdotes. Really glad I read this book.

[Steve · Rating 5 out of 5]

There was a lot I loved about the book. The essays are thought-provoking. The insights into the comedy business are enlightening and gave me a feel for how difficult it is to succeed in comedy. The writing style is conversational; I really felt that Jena Friedman was talking directly to me. And some parts of the book are funny, but the book’s value to me were Friedman’s insights and adventures, not the humor. I fell into the trap of I’ll just read one more chapter. It was never just one more - the book really was hard to put down. Thank you to Netgalley and Atria Books for the digital review copy.

[AnnieM · Rating 3 out of 5]

Jena Friedman is a comedy writer and comedian with many successes such as Borat Subsequent MovieFIlm,, the Daily Show, Soft Focus on Adult Swim, etc. While there is some humor in this book (some of which resonated with me and some which did not), there is a huge focus on the misogyny in the industry and the struggle women face in the writer's room or doing stand-up. These parts of the book were interesting to me. I appreciated her willingness to be candid and share her experiences.

Thank you to Netgalley and Atria Books for an ARC in exchange for my honest review.

[Amalia]

Wish I’d had this book for reassurance/advice when I was starting out as a comedy writer. Required reading: the chapter where beloved male comics answer (and sometimes just balk/marvel at) actual questions posed to women comics. The book works on a lot of different levels— it’s fast-paced and thoughtful, and like her comedy, it broaches a metric ton of challenging subject matter with unflappable candor. It sums up the past decade+ in ways that’ll resonate with anyone who’s currently weathering the tumult of the industry. The audio version’s great— pairs well with Nell Scovell’s memoir.

[Joe Kraus · Rating 5 out of 5]

This may be the best comedy book I have yet read.

When I say “comedy book,” I have particular expectations in mind: I want, first, to get a sense of a comedian’s philosophy. Tina Fey does a good job of that in her Bossypants, where she describes the Yes/And philosophy of improv, and Chris Kattan does a good job of it in describing the nature of physical comedy. The best I’ve run into before this is Steve Martin, who talks about how he embraced silliness as a counter-move to the pointed political humor of his early career.

Friedman absolutely delivers on that front. She is unabashedly a political comic, but, before that, she’s what I recognize as (though she doesn’t cast it as such) a Jewish comedian. She tells us upfront that she believes humor can help us confront injustice. When we can laugh at what’s attempting to destroy us, we weaken that force and we empower ourselves.

That noble-sounding call (and it’s much clunkier in my paraphrase than in her articulation of it) wouldn’t matter if Friedman really were – as her title puts it – not funny. But she is.

So, the second thing I ask for in a comedy book is that it be funny. And Friedman very much is.

She describes ‘bombing’ on her first national TV appearance as part of a Stephen Colbert panel live-reacting to what most of us had assumed would be Hilary Clinton’s election as President. When it became clear that Trump would win, Colbert asked her for a reaction, and she said, “Better get your abortions now, while you still can.”

That’s dark, but I disagree with Friedman that it’s a sign of ‘bombing.’ Maybe others were unhappy with it, but I see it as a brilliant and angry comic move. If the best (political) humor deals with saying the truth with a slant that brings its contradictions into relief, that’s what she did. As it turned out, she was right to be as concerned as she was. She saw immediately one of the ills that Trump’s election augured, and she called on us to see it before we were ready to. A pundit would have needed a full newspaper column to do it. She pulled it off more memorably in under a dozen words.

That’s funny, and it’s the humor we needed then…and perhaps still need, uncomfortable as it can make us.

So, that would be enough for me to see this as a great example of writing about comedy, but it gets (for the most part) even better.

I disagree with Friedman again when she declares that essay writing is her “Achilles heel.” Instead, remarkably, this is a legitimate collection of essays – or maybe better said, a collection of legitimate essays. She begins most of these chapters with a real and burning question: how do you deal with men who pose as allies? How do you measure what it means to have ‘made it’ as a comic or celebrity? How do you learn from failing on stage?

In (almost) each case, she works through the answers, ‘essaying’ toward something she knows but hasn’t previously found the words to articulate. As I say (and I think it’s my original line), the drama of the essay is the self discovering itself, and Friedman is fearless enough here to risk discovering elements of herself she isn’t proud of.

In one essay, she heaps cutting scorn on some of the comedians who’ve benefited from ‘punching down,’ who’ve used their fame and platforms to compel younger, vulnerable female comics into unwanted relationships. In the next, though, she runs through her own positive experiences with Jeff Garlin who, years later, has been accused of bullying on the set of his show The Goldbergs. She admits being torn between the obligation to believe the victims and her own gratitude and affection for someone now seen as toxic. She doesn’t have an easy answer, nor even a snappy punch line in the moment, but she keeps going, following her questions to uncomfortable places and then trusting her wit to make sense of it all.

In other words, even without the persistent humor, these would be essays worth reading. With the humor – with her pro-level timing and gutsiness – they’re flat-out compelling.

The whole time I was reading this, I found myself trying to work into conversation that I was “reading this great book about comedy.”

There are exceptions to the general excellence here, each instances that plague the most less-impressive comedy books. That is, instead of essaying her thoughts, she imports comedy bits as chapters. In one, she weaves together pieces of conversations she has with male comedians she admires as she asks them questions she’s received as a female comic. (Such as “When did you decide to become a male comic?”) The men she asks are great comics – Jon Stewart, Bob Odenkirk, Jim Gaffigan, Eugene Mirman, and Reggie Watts – but it’s a set piece and there’s not much to learn after we get the initial premise. I’m sure Friedman thinks it’s funny, and it is as a concept, but it’s less funny, less edgy, less essayistically brave than most of the rest of the book.

That’s a small criticism, though, of a book that has come to define for me the best of this peculiar genre I’ve come to explore more thoroughly than I ever imagined.

What’s more, since I didn’t really know Friedman’s work before this, it may have introduced me to my favorite current comedian as well.

[Deena B · Rating 2 out of 5]

Snappy but way too left for me. Political.

[Kate · Rating 4 out of 5]

Yes. More like this. Funny, relevant and appreciated.

[Dan · Rating 4 out of 5]

My thanks to both Goodreads and the publisher Atria/One Signal Publishers for an advance copy of this collection of autobiographical essays about the screenwriter/comedian/ very funny human Jena Friedman

I love laughing, mostly at myself, but grew up laughing on sitcoms and comedy specials mostly on HBO. As I got older so did the comedians, and not in a oh their material is getting richer with age. No bad behavior, politics, dull material made me give up on many that I used to follow. However those who blazed a path, and sometimes, a lot of the time gatekeeped, led to others entering the field, even if they had to jump a lot of hurdles. Many with different backgrounds, sexes, attitudes and ways of looking at the world, which I think I am enjoying far more than jokes about airplane food, and other dated material. Jena Friedman is one of those people who has continued to entertain me wherever I see her screen, television, talk shows and now in book form. Even more importantly Friedman has made me think.

Part bio, part examination of an industry and society Friedman shares personal experiences, life lessons, writing types, and funny stories from the road, and other comedians. Starting in improv, and what a mess that was, filling in as a sex columnist, writing for film, and the dark days of the Trump ascendancy are just some of the essays that are included. Oh and a lot of dead baby jokes.

The book is honest, raw and disturbing, and yet funny and hopeful. A lot has gone wrong, however a lot more has gone right. Throughout it all Friedman has not lost her sense of humor, or that spark that keeps her going, and that is great. We all need that kind of encouragement.

This collection of essays hits hard in many different places. Sometimes ending in laughter, sometimes in rage, but all very good.

[Jenni Stein · Rating 3 out of 5]

Won this as a goodreads giveaway, and I'm saddened to say I was not familiar with Jena before reading the book.

Jena is smart and brings life to issues in the comedy world that spread to almost every industry. If you are expecting this book to be a ton of laugh out loud jokes this is probably not the book you're looking for as Jena provides a lot of insight from her own experience and is quite a more on the darker comedy side. I love that she tries to bring attention to major issues in industries regarding inequality.

One of my favorite lines is below, and from the canceled comedian, say the darndest things section:
"Words matter, and if you are lucky enough to be in a position of power where your words are seen and heard, you should wield that power responsibly or risk losing it."
- I truly wish more people in these positions realized this, and there was also more accountability for this across the board, as opposed to subjectively


The main thing I had a hard time getting past was the dead baby joke, aids, or abortion joke section. I understand the feeling of needing to appall or grab attention. I might just be weird, but I just find dead baby jokes disturbing and not funny. When it comes to abortion, wellness clinicsor planned parenthood, I love how she brings light to these issues and addressed them in Borat. Sometimes, the execution comes across harsh and not looking at the effect it could cause to those going through it or having experienced for the sake of trying expand knowledge. This was showcased in the Aids section, where Jena mentioned sending jokes about aids to a friend without even knowing that their spouse died of AIDs.

Overall, it was a good read as I love seeing these issues brought to light. I just feel there has to be a better way to bring light to certain areas like was done in other areas of the book.