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All I Can Handle: I'm No Mother Teresa: A Life Raising Three Daughters with Autism
"Dr. Spock? Check. Penelope Ann Leach (remember her?)? Check. What to Expect When You’re Expecting? Check. I had a seven hundred dollar Bellini crib for God’s sake! I was perfect. And so was Mia when she was born . . ."
...and so begins Kim Stagliano’s electrifying and hilarious memoir of her family’s journey raising three daughters with autism. In these stories, Stagliano has joined the ranks of David Sedaris and Augusten Burroughs with her amazing ability to lay everything on the table—from family, friends, and enemies to basement floods to birthdays to (possible) heroin addictions—eviscerating and celebrating the absurd. From her love of Howard Stern to her increasing activism in the autism community and exhaustive search for treatments that will help her daughters, she covers it all. Always outspoken, often touching, and sometimes heartbreaking, Kim Stagliano is a powerful new voice in comedic writing—her “Kimoir” (as she calls it) will be a must-read within the autism community and the literary world at large.
...and so begins Kim Stagliano’s electrifying and hilarious memoir of her family’s journey raising three daughters with autism. In these stories, Stagliano has joined the ranks of David Sedaris and Augusten Burroughs with her amazing ability to lay everything on the table—from family, friends, and enemies to basement floods to birthdays to (possible) heroin addictions—eviscerating and celebrating the absurd. From her love of Howard Stern to her increasing activism in the autism community and exhaustive search for treatments that will help her daughters, she covers it all. Always outspoken, often touching, and sometimes heartbreaking, Kim Stagliano is a powerful new voice in comedic writing—her “Kimoir” (as she calls it) will be a must-read within the autism community and the literary world at large.
208 pages, Hardcover
First published March 8, 2010
44 people are currently reading
500 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 101 reviews
June 4, 2011
The first third of this book was wonderful. Interesting, funny, informative. As I read I thought of an unfavorable review I had seen here and thought to myself, "That reviewer is nuts! This book is great!". I found the author very likable and a talented writer. And then I continued to read.
I am all for hearing people express opinions, even strong ones, whether or not I agree with those opinions. I like someone who feels passionately about something enough to vocalize just how strongly they feel. However, in the chapters where the author addresses her views on varying causes and responses to Autism she just rants. I would have responded really positively to a clear and concise statment on why she disagreed with others' points of view on both the diagnosis and treatment of Autism. But she is neither clear nor concise. She just interjects a ridiculous amount of phrases like "What?!" "Are you kidding me?!" and "Hello?!" after stating another's opinion which differs from her own. Followed by some counter point or quote and ended with a very annoying restatement of differing view point and an "I don't think so!". This is where her otherwise well executed writing becomes completely derailed. And, unfortunately, you start to not only discredit her own opinions based on these sudden rants, but also begin to dislike her.
As your dislike of her grows and grows so does your complete amazement and disgust at her husband's actions. She spends a fair amount of time lauding her marriage and how great it is. Then describes her spouse losing job after job (not even a crashed economy can account for the sheer amount of firings this man went through in a short span of time) and heading to 8 hour sessions of golf while she stays at home and cares for three daughters with autism and her subsequent blow-ups at her husband when he returns home (or when she drags him away from the golf course...literally).
Her words which once rang true to you now seem contradictory, false and whiny. An unfortunate end to a very promising start. Oh, and I forgot to mention the dozens, yes dozens, of spelling, grammer and typo mistakes. The editor's fault, but annoying none the less.
I am all for hearing people express opinions, even strong ones, whether or not I agree with those opinions. I like someone who feels passionately about something enough to vocalize just how strongly they feel. However, in the chapters where the author addresses her views on varying causes and responses to Autism she just rants. I would have responded really positively to a clear and concise statment on why she disagreed with others' points of view on both the diagnosis and treatment of Autism. But she is neither clear nor concise. She just interjects a ridiculous amount of phrases like "What?!" "Are you kidding me?!" and "Hello?!" after stating another's opinion which differs from her own. Followed by some counter point or quote and ended with a very annoying restatement of differing view point and an "I don't think so!". This is where her otherwise well executed writing becomes completely derailed. And, unfortunately, you start to not only discredit her own opinions based on these sudden rants, but also begin to dislike her.
As your dislike of her grows and grows so does your complete amazement and disgust at her husband's actions. She spends a fair amount of time lauding her marriage and how great it is. Then describes her spouse losing job after job (not even a crashed economy can account for the sheer amount of firings this man went through in a short span of time) and heading to 8 hour sessions of golf while she stays at home and cares for three daughters with autism and her subsequent blow-ups at her husband when he returns home (or when she drags him away from the golf course...literally).
Her words which once rang true to you now seem contradictory, false and whiny. An unfortunate end to a very promising start. Oh, and I forgot to mention the dozens, yes dozens, of spelling, grammer and typo mistakes. The editor's fault, but annoying none the less.
December 15, 2011
I was very disappointed by this book. When I read the jacket, I thought it would be a really interesting book about the day to day challenges of raising three girls with autism. We get way too little of that, and way too much ranting about the evil pharmaceutical companies, the clueless doctors and anyone who dares to disagree with her. I wanted more about her daughters and how they make it all work. Or try to. It made for a very broad and unfocused book. A smaller scope would have really helped. And a good editor. I have a feeling this woman is exhausting to be around.
November 10, 2010
Oh, where to begin... this review is guaranteed to be long, so I apologize ahead of time.
First of all, I can not imagine what it is like to have three children with Autism. I would not be able to handle that. It is obviously a very, very stressful life. I do, however, have a special needs son with some similar traits to Autism so I am not completely unaware of the life.
That being sad, I just could not get into this book. When I first read about it, I could not wait to read it. I understand the stresses of having a child with special needs and all the extra work and understanding that you have to put into parenthood. It is not easy, I know that for a fact. The reviews promised a serious matter with a comedic tone. I'm sorry, but I didn't find her very funny. Yes, she made light of her situation and tried throwing in some witty analogies here and there. I found them annoying. I don't know what it is, I just couldn't get into it.
In part of the book, Kim dedicates a page as "Sex Time" and writes a short paragraph about finding time for she and the husband to have adult time alone. She is debating on writing this chapter and at the end says "I can write this chapter. Turn the page." Now, the following page is blank, so either she couldn't go through with it and made a bad joke, or she is referring to the next chapter, which is what I assumed. Now, assuming she is talking about the next chapter, I was expecting something else along the lines of how it is possible to still find time with your spouse when you have three autistic children demanding all of your time. And I guess I was expecting a little private details too, the way she was hyping it up. But when you turn the page, you find the next chapter, which is about Howard Stern. I'm sorry, but millions of people like Howard Stern. Just because you are some lonely housewife in the suburbs does not mean you have to keep it a big, dirty secret. That is pretty much how she describes it. Once again, pretty annoying.
The next issue I have with the author, is the husband's seemingly lacking interest in helping her with the children and her just letting it be. After years of him taking off to play golf and not being around to help when she most needs it, she finally breaks and yells at him. I'm sorry, but if during the week of our wedding and my husband is playing golf everyday and not helping me with preperations and leaving me to do it alone, I wouldn't take that as a good sign. And i am also pretty sure I wouldn't let him go play golf just because he told his brother he would if my child was having seizures all day. I think I would demand he stay and help with that and the other two children who also needs constant attention. But no, she doesn't put her foot down and stand up for herself. But then throught the book, she can talk about her and her husband's feel of "Catholic Guilt" or "Catholic sense of duty to each other" Why does having guilt about stealing from a store have to be because you are Catholic, or why does wanting to honor your marriage by staying to gether and working things out have to be because you are Catholic? Can you not be a good person and feel guilty about something or want to be there for your spouse without being Catholic? Ugh.
There are also a lot of mistakes in this book. Mostly just a few typos here and there, but in one of the chapters Kim describes a neighbor, Matt, talking to his autistic son. But then a few paragraphs later he is referred to as Mike. I didn't catch it at first, but then she goes on to talk about Mike's wife, and I couldn't figure out who Mike was. Then I realized the mistake. It was pretty confusing at first. Also, Kim also repeats the same information several times. She talks several times about vaccines being exempt from medical liability, without offering any new information each time. It is very redundant. This happens a few times with different subjects.
Overall, I am very disappointed with this book. I could definitely relate to the subject matter, but I just could not connect with the author no matter how much I wanted to.
First of all, I can not imagine what it is like to have three children with Autism. I would not be able to handle that. It is obviously a very, very stressful life. I do, however, have a special needs son with some similar traits to Autism so I am not completely unaware of the life.
That being sad, I just could not get into this book. When I first read about it, I could not wait to read it. I understand the stresses of having a child with special needs and all the extra work and understanding that you have to put into parenthood. It is not easy, I know that for a fact. The reviews promised a serious matter with a comedic tone. I'm sorry, but I didn't find her very funny. Yes, she made light of her situation and tried throwing in some witty analogies here and there. I found them annoying. I don't know what it is, I just couldn't get into it.
In part of the book, Kim dedicates a page as "Sex Time" and writes a short paragraph about finding time for she and the husband to have adult time alone. She is debating on writing this chapter and at the end says "I can write this chapter. Turn the page." Now, the following page is blank, so either she couldn't go through with it and made a bad joke, or she is referring to the next chapter, which is what I assumed. Now, assuming she is talking about the next chapter, I was expecting something else along the lines of how it is possible to still find time with your spouse when you have three autistic children demanding all of your time. And I guess I was expecting a little private details too, the way she was hyping it up. But when you turn the page, you find the next chapter, which is about Howard Stern. I'm sorry, but millions of people like Howard Stern. Just because you are some lonely housewife in the suburbs does not mean you have to keep it a big, dirty secret. That is pretty much how she describes it. Once again, pretty annoying.
The next issue I have with the author, is the husband's seemingly lacking interest in helping her with the children and her just letting it be. After years of him taking off to play golf and not being around to help when she most needs it, she finally breaks and yells at him. I'm sorry, but if during the week of our wedding and my husband is playing golf everyday and not helping me with preperations and leaving me to do it alone, I wouldn't take that as a good sign. And i am also pretty sure I wouldn't let him go play golf just because he told his brother he would if my child was having seizures all day. I think I would demand he stay and help with that and the other two children who also needs constant attention. But no, she doesn't put her foot down and stand up for herself. But then throught the book, she can talk about her and her husband's feel of "Catholic Guilt" or "Catholic sense of duty to each other" Why does having guilt about stealing from a store have to be because you are Catholic, or why does wanting to honor your marriage by staying to gether and working things out have to be because you are Catholic? Can you not be a good person and feel guilty about something or want to be there for your spouse without being Catholic? Ugh.
There are also a lot of mistakes in this book. Mostly just a few typos here and there, but in one of the chapters Kim describes a neighbor, Matt, talking to his autistic son. But then a few paragraphs later he is referred to as Mike. I didn't catch it at first, but then she goes on to talk about Mike's wife, and I couldn't figure out who Mike was. Then I realized the mistake. It was pretty confusing at first. Also, Kim also repeats the same information several times. She talks several times about vaccines being exempt from medical liability, without offering any new information each time. It is very redundant. This happens a few times with different subjects.
Overall, I am very disappointed with this book. I could definitely relate to the subject matter, but I just could not connect with the author no matter how much I wanted to.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
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January 12, 2021I wish I didn't buy or read this book. It was a waste of time and money. At least I only bought a used copy but it's going in the trash.
It would have been nice if this book was more about the day to day challenges of raising three girls with autism.
There are not a lot of stories about her kids. She writes more about herself, her marriage, her husband losing multiple jobs, her husband golfing a lot, their financial problems, her job and her blog. She puts a lot of her blog entries into the book and self congratulates herself for her articles that were published.
Her arguments are more like angry rants about how vaccines cause autism, gluten-free diet is the only way to go, how there is an autism epidemic and they need to find a cure, etc. She is mad with anyone who dares to disagree with her.
There are a lot of spelling, grammar and typo mistakes in the book and she repeats herself a lot.
The book is not funny like she claims it to be.
After reading the first 80 pages it got really uncomfortable to read so I just skim-read the rest of the book. There is a lack of respect for the views of proponents of neurodiversity.
I'm so glad I didn't read this book when my son was first diagnosed with autism. The book made me physical sick to my stomach and it gave me that feeling like I have to throw up. It's not that often that a book makes me feel that uncomfortable.
It has a dark chapter in it. She describes in detail several stories of how some parents with kids with autism brutally killed their kids - so disturbing! Why did she include that?! At the end of that chapter, she says she is a great parent who would never think to do such a thing.
It would have been nice if this book was more about the day to day challenges of raising three girls with autism.
There are not a lot of stories about her kids. She writes more about herself, her marriage, her husband losing multiple jobs, her husband golfing a lot, their financial problems, her job and her blog. She puts a lot of her blog entries into the book and self congratulates herself for her articles that were published.
Her arguments are more like angry rants about how vaccines cause autism, gluten-free diet is the only way to go, how there is an autism epidemic and they need to find a cure, etc. She is mad with anyone who dares to disagree with her.
There are a lot of spelling, grammar and typo mistakes in the book and she repeats herself a lot.
The book is not funny like she claims it to be.
After reading the first 80 pages it got really uncomfortable to read so I just skim-read the rest of the book. There is a lack of respect for the views of proponents of neurodiversity.
I'm so glad I didn't read this book when my son was first diagnosed with autism. The book made me physical sick to my stomach and it gave me that feeling like I have to throw up. It's not that often that a book makes me feel that uncomfortable.
It has a dark chapter in it. She describes in detail several stories of how some parents with kids with autism brutally killed their kids - so disturbing! Why did she include that?! At the end of that chapter, she says she is a great parent who would never think to do such a thing.
May 4, 2011
Maybe I've just read too many memoirs by accomplished authors, but I was disappointed by this book. I felt like I was reading through the author’s scattered thoughts in a journal, not a $24.95 hardcover book.
I didn't see the quality of writing of David Sedaris or Augusten Burroughs that some reviewers mentioned. I found the book messy and redundant, even when most chapters seemed incomplete.
Kudos to the family for keeping it together and thriving, thanks to the author for her courage to share her story and fight for her kids.
I didn't see the quality of writing of David Sedaris or Augusten Burroughs that some reviewers mentioned. I found the book messy and redundant, even when most chapters seemed incomplete.
Kudos to the family for keeping it together and thriving, thanks to the author for her courage to share her story and fight for her kids.
May 6, 2017
This book, frankly, was a mess. I'd expected it to be about more, you know, raising her daughters. There were several points (like when she mentioned the doctor's visit that led them to trying GFCF diets and Mia's "white diet") that I went "ooh, I want to know more about that", but instead it veered off to talk about her marriage or her and her husband's money troubles. There was no clear flow between chapters and even between sections within chapters.
Definitely going in the next bag to half price.
Definitely going in the next bag to half price.
June 18, 2020
I found this book to be muddled and it gave me whiplash with it's constantly jumping timelines. One minute her daughters were little, then they were teens, then they were little again. There was WAY too much information about her own life and trips to Disney land and her job mixed in with way to little information about girls with autism.
Of the information that was given about autism, it was rushed and not clearly elaborated. Just a few things are casually thrown about with a lot of filler about how hard she was trying to find answers and advocate for her kids (always a good thing and very necessary). Apart from that it was just a bit of a useless book in my opinion. It was perhaps due to it being more of a memoir than any kind of information sharing for other mother's and I did know this going in, but then it was also described as laugh out loud and I didn't find it even vaguely funny. (If you want laugh out loud Jenny Lawson is your girl!). Her life is hard - her daughters are autistic to varying degrees - and her husband lost his job - A LOT - so things have clearly been tough and they have gotten through it, but then that's life for many people, so I'm not sure what made any of this important enough to put into a book.
If you are looking for information about girls with autism, there are many better books. If you are looking for a relatable shared experience of being an autism mumma, it just isn't here but there are plenty of good blogs out there that might be able to fill in that blank for you.
Of the information that was given about autism, it was rushed and not clearly elaborated. Just a few things are casually thrown about with a lot of filler about how hard she was trying to find answers and advocate for her kids (always a good thing and very necessary). Apart from that it was just a bit of a useless book in my opinion. It was perhaps due to it being more of a memoir than any kind of information sharing for other mother's and I did know this going in, but then it was also described as laugh out loud and I didn't find it even vaguely funny. (If you want laugh out loud Jenny Lawson is your girl!). Her life is hard - her daughters are autistic to varying degrees - and her husband lost his job - A LOT - so things have clearly been tough and they have gotten through it, but then that's life for many people, so I'm not sure what made any of this important enough to put into a book.
If you are looking for information about girls with autism, there are many better books. If you are looking for a relatable shared experience of being an autism mumma, it just isn't here but there are plenty of good blogs out there that might be able to fill in that blank for you.
October 13, 2020
I like how Stagliano writes! There is a type of humor involved yet the situation is serious. It takes that type of a person to be able to handle all she has been through. "God gives us the mountain thinks we can climb, and obviously Stagliano can climb Mt Everest!" You know I liked it when I finished it in one day. I'm now sending it to my friend who has two kids with autism.
September 18, 2011
Kim Stagliano is definitely a passionate mom who has a lot to say. I was intrigued when I heard about her book, All I Can Handle: I'm No Mother Teresa: A Life Raising Three Daughters With Autism. I am a mother myself, but have no personal experience with autism. I have several friends who have children with autism and I was interested in a deeper look into an autism mom's daily life.
Alas, this book is not what I hoped it would be. I think that Stagliano's scope was larger than I expected it would be. I also think that Stagliano is a good writer whose piece would have benefited from further revision and editing. There were way too many details and asides that detracted from rather than enhanced her storytelling. For example, I could have done without most of the descriptors of her husband's careers and the specifics of his job losses. Just knowing they were struggling with unemployment would have been enough. Also, I can appreciate the author's humorous tone, but felt like she was trying too hard at times.
The topic of the book was compelling and the work itself was readable; I sped right through it. Certain sections would have been great blog entries. The reprint of the "crapisode" essay was great. I just finished the book feeling unsatisfied. There are quite a few memoirs being published right now, and this is a case where the publisher should have been held to a greater standard. The raw material was good, but this book needed work.
Alas, this book is not what I hoped it would be. I think that Stagliano's scope was larger than I expected it would be. I also think that Stagliano is a good writer whose piece would have benefited from further revision and editing. There were way too many details and asides that detracted from rather than enhanced her storytelling. For example, I could have done without most of the descriptors of her husband's careers and the specifics of his job losses. Just knowing they were struggling with unemployment would have been enough. Also, I can appreciate the author's humorous tone, but felt like she was trying too hard at times.
The topic of the book was compelling and the work itself was readable; I sped right through it. Certain sections would have been great blog entries. The reprint of the "crapisode" essay was great. I just finished the book feeling unsatisfied. There are quite a few memoirs being published right now, and this is a case where the publisher should have been held to a greater standard. The raw material was good, but this book needed work.
June 6, 2012
I can't imagine having one kid with autism, let alone 3 girls with it. This book started off as an insiders look at what raising special needs kids, specially those with autism, really means. It was sad, funny and had a very casual-talking-with-a-friend type of tone. The last third of the book, however, seemed to take a turn in tone and when it started to explore the author's somewhat controversial views on autism, I got a little turned off. I understand that she is passionate about the topic, and clearly she has been beaten down and vilified for her views online and elsewhere, but the agressive tone did take me aback somewhat.
I'm glad that I read the paperback version since it included more information about the ending - which felt very vague and unsatisfying at first.
In summary: This was a book I read for a Wayzata staff book discussion. I'm glad I read it, but I didn't love all of it. I don't feel informed enough to agree or disagree with some of her more contentious points, but they are probably good food for thought in the future. Kim Stagliano is a fighter for her kids and while I hope it's a fight that I don't have to fight, I'm glad she cares about her kids that much.
I'm glad that I read the paperback version since it included more information about the ending - which felt very vague and unsatisfying at first.
In summary: This was a book I read for a Wayzata staff book discussion. I'm glad I read it, but I didn't love all of it. I don't feel informed enough to agree or disagree with some of her more contentious points, but they are probably good food for thought in the future. Kim Stagliano is a fighter for her kids and while I hope it's a fight that I don't have to fight, I'm glad she cares about her kids that much.
October 30, 2010
In writing All I Can Handle, Kim Stagliano does something that feels amazing - she makes me feel like someone else truly understands what I face as the parent of two autistic boys. Her very frank writing about the realities of raising autistic girls puts into words things that my husband and I go through constantly ("Having a child with autism is like a giant game of chess. You need to think several moves ahead to ward off potential problems.") I'm very tempted to give this book to several members of my family to give them a peek into what we are dealing with.
However, the book does feel like two different books in one. It is clear from her writing that Kim feels that there is a strong link between vaccinations and autism. She spends several chapters on this topic. While I fully respect her position, I was more interested in this book for her personal stories and observations. If I want a book about the potential link between autism and vaccinations, there are many others to choose from.
Great book!!!
However, the book does feel like two different books in one. It is clear from her writing that Kim feels that there is a strong link between vaccinations and autism. She spends several chapters on this topic. While I fully respect her position, I was more interested in this book for her personal stories and observations. If I want a book about the potential link between autism and vaccinations, there are many others to choose from.
Great book!!!
October 9, 2011
This woman has gigantic balls. She's been criticized right and left for her opinions on the vaccine companies, belief that autism can be cured and for speaking out about just how hard and crappy it can be to raise 3 girls with autism. What an amazing person to stick so hard to her beliefs, to do her research -- in depth research -- about the effects of vaccines on our children and to not just throw up her hands and accept her "fate". No matter how you feel about the autism/vaccine connection, I can PROMISE you this book will make you think. Also, she's pretty darn funny!
August 1, 2017
I generally love memoirs, and I think that Ms. Stagliano has had enough life experiences and insights to write a good one, but this wasn't it. I desperately wanted to like this book, but it was in dire need of a good editor. The mistakes were so numerous and so juvenile that I wonder if Ms. Stagliano took the time to read her own book, or if she accidentally submitted her rough draft, and the publishing editor was clearly asleep on the job. Mistakes included the lack of capitalization of the word "I" twice in the same sentence (pg 42), naming the wrong daughter in a story (i.e. - "I threw on jeans and a T-shirt and together with Mark got Bella, whimpering, into her car seat. He went back into the house to stay with Mia and Bella as I drove . . . (pg 64), writing "Kart" instead of "Karl," failing to capitalize the name "Sarge,(pg 181)" and more. The use and misuse of commas was tragic. These elementary errors were incredibly distracting.
Additionally, The book was written like a series of blog posts with no overall arc or logical sequence. Points were repeated ad nauseum, and the lack of coherency caused the novel to feel like a ride on the Tilt-a-Whirl. By the time the reader gained their bearings, Ms. Stagliano had flitted off to another topic.
The book cover and description are misleading as well. If you are looking for stories about raising children with Autism, there are staggeringly few in this book. The author spent more time bashing her physical appearance than she did relating antecdotes from raising her daughters. She also spent the majority of the book on the soapbox. If the author wishes to write an opinion piece about the epidemic of Autism and her suspicions of the vaccine industry, that is well within her rights, but such a book would be wrongly categorized as a biography/memoir.
The bottom line is that if you want to feel like a ping-pong ball, bounced frenetically around between Ms. Stagliano's life experiences (some of which are related to Autism), opinions, and insecurities, peppered with antecdotes about raising three daughters with Autism and liberally salted with grammatical errors, this book is for you. If, like me, you find this prospect dizzying, you may wish to choose another book.
Additionally, The book was written like a series of blog posts with no overall arc or logical sequence. Points were repeated ad nauseum, and the lack of coherency caused the novel to feel like a ride on the Tilt-a-Whirl. By the time the reader gained their bearings, Ms. Stagliano had flitted off to another topic.
The book cover and description are misleading as well. If you are looking for stories about raising children with Autism, there are staggeringly few in this book. The author spent more time bashing her physical appearance than she did relating antecdotes from raising her daughters. She also spent the majority of the book on the soapbox. If the author wishes to write an opinion piece about the epidemic of Autism and her suspicions of the vaccine industry, that is well within her rights, but such a book would be wrongly categorized as a biography/memoir.
The bottom line is that if you want to feel like a ping-pong ball, bounced frenetically around between Ms. Stagliano's life experiences (some of which are related to Autism), opinions, and insecurities, peppered with antecdotes about raising three daughters with Autism and liberally salted with grammatical errors, this book is for you. If, like me, you find this prospect dizzying, you may wish to choose another book.
May 24, 2017
So I *almost* didn't read this book because Jenny McCarthy wrote the foreword, but I'm glad I did. Ms. Stagliano has a way with words and is an engaging storyteller. Despite the subject matter, there were times where I forgot I was reading about a woman struggling to raise three daughters with autism and instead thought I was reading a page out of Good Fellas. Her prose and vernacular is just so North Eastern she, quite figuratively, transported me to Boston.
I also really liked how she kept it 100 talking about the struggles of raising three girls on the spectrum. She didn't sugar coat it, and in fact, spoke out about those who do gloss over the dirty details of life. Her love for her daughters, and her protectiveness over them come shining through.
So why 3 stars and not 5? Because her POV, laid on quite heavily at times, can be overbearing and overwhelming for someone who doesn't agree with her. I wouldn't say she's pushy about being an anti-vaxxer. And, in fact, does not consider herself to be one. And yet, there is a tone to her book that strongly implies that no rational person who reads the literature could possibly be okay with vaccinations and/or the vaccination schedule pushed by pediatricians. She's also incredibly dismissive of pediatricians themselves and places a lot of blame on them for not having the amount of knowledge she believes they should have about autism and early intervention. She's very opinionated about science, research, doctors, big pharma, etc. And who's to pass judgment on that? She is raising 3 girls with autism. Still, some chapters were a little too preachy to get through and I couldn't wait to get through the sermon so that I could hear more delightfully told tales about her life.
I also really liked how she kept it 100 talking about the struggles of raising three girls on the spectrum. She didn't sugar coat it, and in fact, spoke out about those who do gloss over the dirty details of life. Her love for her daughters, and her protectiveness over them come shining through.
So why 3 stars and not 5? Because her POV, laid on quite heavily at times, can be overbearing and overwhelming for someone who doesn't agree with her. I wouldn't say she's pushy about being an anti-vaxxer. And, in fact, does not consider herself to be one. And yet, there is a tone to her book that strongly implies that no rational person who reads the literature could possibly be okay with vaccinations and/or the vaccination schedule pushed by pediatricians. She's also incredibly dismissive of pediatricians themselves and places a lot of blame on them for not having the amount of knowledge she believes they should have about autism and early intervention. She's very opinionated about science, research, doctors, big pharma, etc. And who's to pass judgment on that? She is raising 3 girls with autism. Still, some chapters were a little too preachy to get through and I couldn't wait to get through the sermon so that I could hear more delightfully told tales about her life.
January 2, 2022
Weird
This book was very readable, which I appreciated. My daughter is autistic and non-speaking, but I am not really in the autism community so had never heard of the author. I started getting a weird feeling when she devoted a whole chapter to her love of Howard Stern (which is fine, just strange to include in this book, in my opinion). That's when I googled her and her latest Twitter post was wishing everyone a happy NYE and fondly remembering her dad for saying he would kill the father of her children (her husband in the book). Anyway, long story short, the lady is off. She would be going somewhere that could be interesting, then it would dissipate bc she had no real research or data, just opinions and faulty logic. Really frustrating. But she's a decent writer and funny at times. I can see why she is used as a voice in her corner of the autism community bc she's good at manipulating and playing both sides. It's pretty obvious that her daughters have something recessively genetic going on and that vaccines couldn't possibly be to blame since she says her youngest wasn't vaccinated. She argues that autism doesn't run in their families, but that's not valid bc it's probably something recessive. Genetic testing doesn't cover every gene sequence either so not finding anything doesn't mean it's not genetic. Pretty sure she knows this and is playing dumb to spread misinformation.
This book was very readable, which I appreciated. My daughter is autistic and non-speaking, but I am not really in the autism community so had never heard of the author. I started getting a weird feeling when she devoted a whole chapter to her love of Howard Stern (which is fine, just strange to include in this book, in my opinion). That's when I googled her and her latest Twitter post was wishing everyone a happy NYE and fondly remembering her dad for saying he would kill the father of her children (her husband in the book). Anyway, long story short, the lady is off. She would be going somewhere that could be interesting, then it would dissipate bc she had no real research or data, just opinions and faulty logic. Really frustrating. But she's a decent writer and funny at times. I can see why she is used as a voice in her corner of the autism community bc she's good at manipulating and playing both sides. It's pretty obvious that her daughters have something recessively genetic going on and that vaccines couldn't possibly be to blame since she says her youngest wasn't vaccinated. She argues that autism doesn't run in their families, but that's not valid bc it's probably something recessive. Genetic testing doesn't cover every gene sequence either so not finding anything doesn't mean it's not genetic. Pretty sure she knows this and is playing dumb to spread misinformation.
August 4, 2018
I appreciate how tough it must be to write a book caring for three daughters with autism. However this book was written, edited and organized poorly. There were typos, and information and chapters not arranged in a well thought out manner. It was at times reading a series of thoughts or experiences linked togwther rather than a complete book that led from one point to another. I was hoping the book would be funny but it wasn't.
Even with my disappointment in how the book was written, I still thought it was interesting. I've read other books about autism and didn't feel the other ones gave me as much a picture as this one did as to what it would be like to raise an autistic child. This book was so real and talked about many experiences describing it in a way that you can picture what it would have been like to be there. It also gives you a different view of how complex autism is since this author has the rare experience of parenting three children with autism all with varying degrees of affliction. I admire this author for her passion.
Even with my disappointment in how the book was written, I still thought it was interesting. I've read other books about autism and didn't feel the other ones gave me as much a picture as this one did as to what it would be like to raise an autistic child. This book was so real and talked about many experiences describing it in a way that you can picture what it would have been like to be there. It also gives you a different view of how complex autism is since this author has the rare experience of parenting three children with autism all with varying degrees of affliction. I admire this author for her passion.
March 15, 2017
I just was really disappointed by this book. There was no narrative and yet her information seems crazed and all over the place. She both undershares and overshares. No one is likeable or relatable.
Her position that there is an epidemic is intriguing and worth talking about. But her use of just not remembering autistic kids so they weren't there in the past is so absurd it makes me angry. Society used to lock these kids away. Some of them were killed. You don't remember them because the very difficult struggle your family is taking would have been impossible a generation or two ago.
Her position that there is an epidemic is intriguing and worth talking about. But her use of just not remembering autistic kids so they weren't there in the past is so absurd it makes me angry. Society used to lock these kids away. Some of them were killed. You don't remember them because the very difficult struggle your family is taking would have been impossible a generation or two ago.
December 14, 2020
Got about halfway through this book and had to stop. The intense feelings towards big pharma and vaccine injury is to each their own. I personally don’t agree with the author’s beliefs so it was hard to want to continue with her story when it felt like her beliefs were being pushed on the reader. I should’ve known just as much when I saw the dreaded Jenny McCarthy wrote the book forward. My daughter has autism so I was told this book would shed light and give me a laugh on what can be such a stressful environment and while the author was funny, her opinions didn’t impress me.
September 19, 2023
Dear God this is vile.
Pro ABA (Which is literally torture and causes masses of trauma)
Pro eugenics
Pro autism cure
Pro aspergers
Out of date information on different presentations of autism (hint it's not just the non verbal kid who isn't potty trained)
"Vacines cause autism" misinformation
Just a lot of really harmful stuff.
Avoid, avoid, avoid.
From, someone who's actually autistic and doesn't need to be cured from simply being different. What I need is society to get it's shit together.
Pro ABA (Which is literally torture and causes masses of trauma)
Pro eugenics
Pro autism cure
Pro aspergers
Out of date information on different presentations of autism (hint it's not just the non verbal kid who isn't potty trained)
"Vacines cause autism" misinformation
Just a lot of really harmful stuff.
Avoid, avoid, avoid.
From, someone who's actually autistic and doesn't need to be cured from simply being different. What I need is society to get it's shit together.
November 11, 2017
Kim Stagliano has all she can handle. With three autistic girls she holds no bars in telling you how it is. Having worked with autistic children in the past, Kim uses humor and exasperation. Kim takes us through several moves, her husband losing and gaining job after job. Trouble getting and keeping the girls in school. Worrying about the future. Worrying about the future of her children.
July 15, 2024
The authors hate autistic people and consider us diseased. They also support the eugenics organization "Autism Speaks" that wants to purge us from the planet by preventing our birth, and finding "cures." Autism is a SPECTRUM. Take a look around at what groundbreaking scientists and artists all were autistic and shaped the landscape of modern civilization. You're welcome, bitches. 🖕
September 9, 2019
An inspiring story
Parenting is a full time job - with a different job description for each child. The job requirements must be figured out by each parent along the way. Kim is one heck of a parent and her girls are lucky to have her
Parenting is a full time job - with a different job description for each child. The job requirements must be figured out by each parent along the way. Kim is one heck of a parent and her girls are lucky to have her
April 21, 2025
I really enjoy the writing style it’s fresh new and exciting. But once she starts to state her opinion it’s a bit all over the place, confusing to keep up and lost my interested and enthusiasm I had while reading this
May 27, 2019
The Stagtastrophe made pretty darned funny
My Full Review
My Full Review
October 18, 2019
I was hoping for more day to day stories but this was very disjointed and jumped around quite a bit and I was disappointed.
January 18, 2020
After finishing reading this book I still have problem understanding the difference between retarded and autistic children.
July 23, 2020
You are horribly ignorant of autism. Stop spreading harmful misinformation
February 11, 2025
Hated every second of, a miracle I even finished it.
March 20, 2017
My worldview is vastly different from the author's, and she certainly kept me shaking my head in disbelief, yet I found her outlook on life quite admirable. Though she is skewered for her views on vaccines, it gives one food for thought.
March 20, 2017
Makes you think
I truly admire this woman. I may not agree with her in many subjects, but she truly made me stop and think about where she was coming from. I might even agree with her more if I were in her situation. I also really admire her positive outlook on life.
I truly admire this woman. I may not agree with her in many subjects, but she truly made me stop and think about where she was coming from. I might even agree with her more if I were in her situation. I also really admire her positive outlook on life.
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