Diary of a Mad Playwright: Perilous Adventures on the Road with Mary Martin and Carol Channing

by James Kirkwood Jr.

(Applause Books). Kirkwood, the co-writer of the book of the great musical A Chorus Line , also wrote the stage play Legends , for which Carol Channing and Mary Martin embarked on a nationwide, bound-for-Broadway tour. This book chronicles the slow disintigration of the whole project, thanks to bickering divas, greedy producers, hostile reviewers, and general chaos. Kirkwood's fine eye for detail and general good humor keep this book lighhearted and funny, even as sadness lingers in the wings. A wonderful book for anyone who loves the theatre.

Genres: Nonfiction, Theatre, Drama, Memoir

336 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 1, 1989

About the author

James Kirkwood, Jr. was an American playwright and author born in Los Angeles, California. His father, James Kirkwood, Sr. was an actor and director in silent films and his mother was actress Lila Lee. He died in 1989 of spinal cancer.

Reviews

[Duncan · Rating 5 out of 5]

It’s not the most important thing to say about this witty charmer that chronicles the waning days of the era of American theatre when you could mount a nationwide tour to try and develop a play for Broadway, but I’d like to say it: James Kirkwood was gay and died of AIDS shortly after this book was published. He never mentions his sexuality in this memoir, although two of his lovers appear. They are labeled as “dear friends.” At the time he wrote the book, it would have been “inadvisable” to bring up his sexuality, “a distraction from the story you’re trying to tell,” it would have “significantly decreased the size of your potential audience.” He made the reasonable choice to closet himself in his pages. He stood as close to the closet door as possible, he tested boundaries with some of his stories and jokes and anecdotes. But ultimately he wasn’t allowed to show up authentically in the pages of his own memoir because those were the rules at the time. It’s informative, interesting, and sad to read books by gay authors that were written under that code. It’s also something that makes me feel proud of my heritage, of the people who were toughing it out back then, surviving and creating in spite of being told every day how it would disgust everyone if they told the truth about themselves.

[Stacia · Rating 2 out of 5]

Diary of a Mad Playwright has long been touted as gossipy, juicy and insightful, but as much as I was primed to enjoy it, I just couldn't. It's poorly written, apparently completely unedited, and bitter to a really uncomfortable degree.

Sections open with a date and what sounds like a diary entry, complete with choppy writing and partial sentences, usually in present tense. Within a few sentences this changes to full memoir-style writing, now in the past tense, and from there, the writing will shift between tenses and styles, sometimes within a single paragraph. It makes for a tough read. There's quite a bit of padding in the form of reproduced copies of newspaper articles and entire letters he had sent to colleagues, as well.

Kirkwood is not a pleasant person, and even his version of events, clearly meant to exonerate him, makes him look terrible. He just doesn't have a lot of regard for others sometimes; for instance, he makes disparaging remarks about a replacement actress toward the end of the book, and misspells both her first and last names constantly, probably about 50 times total. Given that he at one point nearly blames her for the failure of the show to get to Broadway, which is ludicrous for about a million different reasons, and that he includes the entirety of a letter that mentions her and has her name spelled correctly, I think that the misspelling could have been deliberate, and if so, it's one of the most petty things I've ever seen in print.

There are dozens of conflicts, concerning events, interesting incidents all described halfway, the beginnings of the anecdote revealed, but without any resolution. Clearly these are things that were mentioned in his diary, which he never got around to (or perhaps never had a chance to) follow up on later.

Kirkwood also laughs a lot in this book. "Roars," is how he puts it. Lots of roaring. Somehow, nothing he roars at is actually funny. Here he is, assuring you that the incident or one-liner he has just related is very funny indeed, a laugh riot, if you will, yet there isn't an ounce of humor to be had. Take for instance his use of the f-bomb, which is liberally applied throughout. Every so often, he uses the cutesy spelling "phuquing" in an apparent attempt to make the incident seem more lighthearted, yet he still seems just as irritated as if he goes whole hog with the f-bombs. It actually comes across as worse when he tries to act jovial when you know full well that he was seething when he wrote it all down.

The final 20 or so pages describing the last performance and a few events in the epilogue are particularly hard to take, especially knowing Kirkwood was almost certainly painting things in the best possible light for himself. I left this book feeling like I needed a shower.

[Bret · Rating 2 out of 5]

The behind the scenes tale of the possibly Broadway bound play 'Legends'. The book seems to have everything to make it a juicy good time: the play stars Mary Martin and Carol Channing, the director is MIA and/or afraid to direct the ladies, a crew of clueless producers, the book is written by the playwright James Kirkwood Jr and the show never made it to Broadway. Unfortunately, this book was in major need of editing.

It covers a year and a half, going day by day and it gets repetitive real fast. Is Mary Martin doing the show? She's in. She's out. Repeat. Does she know her lines? Today she does. The next day she doesn't. Repeat. Carol is difficult today. Carol is difficult tomorrow. Repeat. Considering Mr. Kirkwood's play was a comedy you'd assume this book would be humorous, but it was torturous at times with the same events happening over and over, city after city. There are so many people involved in the play behind the scenes it gets hard to keep up with all the names of producers, assistants, and friends coming and going.

I didn't think I was going to make it to the end but somehow I pressed on. It was interesting at times to get an inside glimpse into putting on a play with these two legends of the theater but probably could have been summed up in 10 pages.

[Michael Ritchie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Many years ago, I read a couple of novels by Kirkwood and enjoyed them, especially P.S. Your Cat Is Dead. I feel like I also read this back when it was first published (late 80s) but I was not as steeped in classic celebrity knowledge then as I am now, and I remembered little about it. It's fun to see someone give a fairly uncensored report of what it's like to work on a play--not just the diva-ish behavior of the stars, but also the antics of the producers and directors. Actually, Martin and Channing don't come off all that badly: Martin was struggling with age-related problems and Channing sounds quite fun when she's not being a pain in the ass. Kirkwood allows himself to come off as a little less than charming at times. The last third of the book could have been trimmed a bit, but overall I'd recommend this to celebrity and theatre fans.

[Frank · Rating 3 out of 5]

The stories about the tour of James Kirkwood's LEGENDS with Mary Martin and Carol Channing have become show business legends, largely because of this book. It's a dishy read, but it seems awfully self-serving. In all his lamenting over the problems with the production, he never mentions the key flaw, the play itself. It's too late to get Mary Martin's version of what happened, though he's actually rather generous with her. I wish I could find something from Carol Channing on the experience, because he does not draw a flattering picture of her.

[Laura · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is a hoot, and fun for those with a fascination for the theater. Frustrating too, feeling as I do that the play in question, LEGENDS, deserved more success, and a New York City run (not saying it’s a masterpiece, but good fun). Nice also to spend time with James Kirkwood himself, whose novels I enjoyed as a teen.

[Ronald Stephens · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thoroughly enjoyable....

Thoroughly enjoyable if you like wallowing in the insanity, pain and joy of getting a show on the boards. Kirk wood makes you relive it with them.

[Kellen Blair · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hilarious and terrifying, and a very fun read!

[Brian McCann · Rating 5 out of 5]

Honest and dishy. After first reading this in 1991, I just reread LEGENDS! Kirkwood writes a wonderful book about a tumultuous production.

[Daniel Krolik · Rating 5 out of 5]

They coulda gone with Celeste Holm and Debbie Reynolds. But they got Carol and Mary and for that I am deeply thankful.

[Ray · Rating 2 out of 5]

I first heard about the play "Legends!" when it came to Philly a year or two ago with Joan Collins (or maybe Jackie). I was not all that interested in seeing it, but then Charles Busch did a version with Lypsinka I think in NYC which I was sad I missed. Reading about that, I somehow came across a reference to this book written by the playwright, about the original with Carol Channing and Mary Martin. It seemed too good to pass up.

Unfortunately it's way too bitchy. Kirkwood spends 90% of the book talking about how everyone did him wrong in the process of bringing his play to life. Yet, he seems to hold himself and his writing absent from critique.

I love Carol Channing. I find her endlessly entertaining and fascinating on so many levels. And the worst part of "Diary of a Mad Playwright" for me was learning probably a little too much about her. I'd rather keep her on a pedestal.

And maybe it is just my own sense of history, but reading about a play being produced during the height of the AIDs crisis (in like 1986-88) that barely talks about AIDS was kind of shocking. Now it's probably just the revisionism of the modern-day gay community that makes me shocked by this (ie there were always catty, vapid, superficial things going in in the community no matter the pitch of any crisis) but the feeling was still notable--especially because Kirkwood dies himself of AIDS just after the book was published (something he never mentions at all I might add).

If you want and unvarnished, biased view of theater though, there is something to be gleaned from this "Diary" not to mention liberal name-dropping.

[Ray · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Diary of a Mad Playwright" is a wonderful behind-the-scenes look at the making of a projected Broadway play, written by the co-author of "A Chorus Line". It deals with his play "Legends" and all that went into the creation, casting and production of the play that starred Mary Martin and Carol Channing, both legends in their own right. Hilarious, touching and downright 'bitchy' throughout, this is a terrific read.

[Kent · Rating 3 out of 5]

There are some books you want to read, and then there are some books you have to read. Diary comes closer to the have catagory if you have any interest in the theater biz. As stated in other reviews of mine, I'm not a fan of the memoir, this one included. There is some good stuff in here, but one gets a little tired of hearing Kirkwood blow smoke every which way he can.

[Joe Hartman · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is...delicious. I could not stop reading it. I love a good backstage story, and there's no juicier story than that of a play in trouble, especially with two ladies like Mary Martin and Carol Channing. Even better, at the end of the story you will still respect and admire both of them, flaws and all.

[Christopher · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dishy, dishy read. If you haven't worked in the business, you'll find it hard to believe. If you have, well, it's very close to the bone.

[Dave · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was kind of a guilty pleasure, but strangely depressing, especially where Mary Martin was concerned. Anyone even thinking about producing theatre should read this.

[Robby Johnson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Wow. What a doozy. Fun and gossipy. Highly recommend.

[Devan Sipher · Rating 4 out of 5]

Anyone who likes backstage stories or has an interest in theater will enjoy this riotous memoir by an author of the musical A Chorus Line.