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The Blame Game: How the Hidden Rules of Credit and Blame Determine Our Success or Failure
FROM HIS YEARS OF EXPERIENCE CONSULTING to leading companies, psychologist Ben Dattner has discovered that at the root of the worst problems we confront at work is the skewed allocation of blame and credit. In so many workplaces, people feel they’re playing a high-stakes game of “blame or be blamed,” which can be disastrous for the individuals who get caught up in it and can sink teams and afflict whole companies. Dattner presents compelling evidence that whether we fall into the trap of playing the blame game or learn to avoid the pitfalls is a major determinant of how successful we will be. The problem is that so many workplaces foster a blaming culture. Maybe you have a constantly blaming boss, or a colleague who is always taking credit for others’ work. All too often, individuals are scapegoated, teams fall apart, projects get derailed, and people become disengaged because fear and resentment have taken root. And what’s worse, the more emotionally charged a workplace is—maybe our jobs are threatened or we’re facing a particularly difficult challenge—the more emphatically people play the game, just when trust and collaboration are most needed. What can we do? We can learn to understand the hidden dynamics of human psychology that lead to this bad behavior so that we can inoculate ourselves against it and defuse the tensions in our own workplace. In lively prose that is as engaging as it is illuminating, Dattner tells a host of true stories of those he has worked with—from the woman who was so scapegoated by her colleagues that she decided to quit, to the clueless boss who was too quick to blame his staff. He shares a wealth of insight from the study of human evolution and psychology to reveal the underlying reasons why people are so prone to blaming and credit-grabbing; it’s not only human nature, it’s found throughout the animal kingdom. Even bats do it. He shows how our family experiences, gender, and culture also all shape the way we cope with credit and blame issues, and introduces eleven personality types that are especially prone to causing difficulties and illustrates how we can best cope with them. He also profiles how a number of outstanding leaders, from General Dwight Eisenhower and President Harry Truman to highly respected business figures such as former Intel CEO Andy Grove and Xerox CEO Ursula Burns, employed the power of taking blame and sharing credit to achieve great success. The only winning move in the blame game, Dattner shows, is not to play, and the insights and practical suggestions in this book will help readers, at any level of any organization and at any stage of their careers, learn to manage the crucial psychology of credit and blame for themselves and others.
256 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2011
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250 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 23 of 23 reviews
September 19, 2011
An interesting book about credit and blame, how we may tend to take more credit than is due and deflect blame from ourselves onto others. The authors go through why that is - nature, nurture, typecasting. This book particularly focuses on business situations but I found myself considering sending a copy to the House, Senate and White House!
September 23, 2012
The "Blame Game" based on research and real life examples, is an excellent resource for consultants, CEO's, managers and anyone who wants to develop greater self awareness about the dangers and consequences of unconscious blaming for leaders and their organizations
March 15, 2015
I was not happy with this book, it did not provided any insightful background or tips to deal with blaming culture but rather gave short snippets of stories, author's experience (uneventful) and other book references related to blaming. Most of which, many people should already know about, if you watch TedTalk. It was as though the author googled "Blame Culture" and paraphrased the top 10 search results. This book even summarized the Myers-Briggs to fill up a few pages and never explored it's concept in regards to blaming but rather have one concluding paragraph stating "it is relevant". Most of the countless references he paraphrased concluded with a similar paragraph stating "it is relevant" rather than delving into it's relevance and exploring it's concepts. It was as if he was trying to say, you have to figure it out yourself because there are no definitive answers or I simple just don't know, but here are some relevant material related to this topic. He even created a list of personality types to show you how to deal with people in regards to "blaming culture" but then concluded with, these are not accurate and you should not judge people based on these types I created because prejudice is baaaad. Even his Website he suggested in this book which was meant to identify your personality type DOES NOT WORK!!! Check it out, I'm not lying. www.performanceprogram.com/blamegame
I blame you Ben and Darren for writing this book. I'm sure you guys can handle it, as mentioned in your book, don't take it too personally. Take a little bit of your own advice and own up to this mistake of a book you wrote.
I blame you Ben and Darren for writing this book. I'm sure you guys can handle it, as mentioned in your book, don't take it too personally. Take a little bit of your own advice and own up to this mistake of a book you wrote.
June 11, 2012
The Blame Game is grounded in both theoretical and practical approaches to understanding the currency of credit and blame in the workplace. Ben cites many instances of workplace issues encountered in his consulting career, and his best approach for solving them. Often, I found myself nodding along with his examples - though they're specific cases, the issues are universal.
Ben also provides insight into your personal style of credit and blame navigation with a link to a website that allows you to take a survey. One of the hallmarks of his book is that the politics of blame can be diffused simply through awareness of their presence. In taking the survey, you get a glimpse into your valence, which allows you to make more informed choices regarding your behavior or attributions to co-workers' perceived behavior.
Ben writes that the best way to win the blame game is to not play it - this book gives you the tools to diffuse emotional responses to blame and credit inequity and patiently change the game.
Ben also provides insight into your personal style of credit and blame navigation with a link to a website that allows you to take a survey. One of the hallmarks of his book is that the politics of blame can be diffused simply through awareness of their presence. In taking the survey, you get a glimpse into your valence, which allows you to make more informed choices regarding your behavior or attributions to co-workers' perceived behavior.
Ben writes that the best way to win the blame game is to not play it - this book gives you the tools to diffuse emotional responses to blame and credit inequity and patiently change the game.
May 31, 2012
The issues of credit and blame cut across almost every facet of our lives. While this book is mostly rooted in the work environment, citing real-life examples from the author's career in consulting, the concepts are incredibly relatable, and applicable to every day life. Theories and conceptual ideas are intertwined throughout the text, but it is the realism and pragmatism with which the book was written that really stands out. This is a must-read for anyone who is in a management position, as it outlines and brings to light an underlying phenomenon with which we all struggle, and provides solutions that can be implemented almost immediately.
May 31, 2012
The issues of credit and blame cut across almost every facet of our lives. While this book is mostly rooted in the work environment, citing real-life examples from the author's career in consulting, the concepts are incredibly relatable, and applicable to every day life. Theories and conceptual ideas are intertwined throughout the text, but it is the realism and pragmatism with which the book was written that really stands out. This is a must-read for anyone who is in a management position, as it outlines and brings to light an underlying phenomenon with which we all struggle, and provides solutions that can be implemented almost immediately.
March 21, 2023
Typical self help book disappointment. Promises on the cover "How the hidden rules of credit and blame determine our success or failure." Spends 90% of the book telling stories and anecdotes. The final chapter does a lot of 'I can't promise any of this will work." Then makes vague points. There weren't even any lists! I don't feel like I learned any rules about how blame gets assigned. I need things spelled out for me. On top of that I've already read many of the books referenced and heard most of the anecdotal stories. I only recommend this if you like reading about general things for their own sake, and if you haven't read much Psychology and Economics.
June 13, 2012
From a student's perspective, Ben Dattner's, "The Blame Game," is timeless. The wise saying, "history repeats itself," is quite evident in the destructive behavior in which employees across the world exemplify day in and day out. The stories revealed, help an outsider feel all too relatable. These stories can be used for reflection and evaluation of one's own practices whether it be the `blamer', the `blamee,' or simply the `overlooked employee.' This book should be used as a guide for people in all professions especially those in executive positions. Highly recommend!
June 6, 2012
I was lucky enough to get this early, before it becomes the bible for CEOs. 'The Blame Game' has already been helpful in my understanding of my own management style.
Its also given me insight into the nuanced dance between management and employees and among co-workers.
I am looking at my business in different light and anticipate a boon to my company's ultimate success, both in terms of employee satisfaction and overall production.
Highly recommend.
Its also given me insight into the nuanced dance between management and employees and among co-workers.
I am looking at my business in different light and anticipate a boon to my company's ultimate success, both in terms of employee satisfaction and overall production.
Highly recommend.
June 7, 2012
I am glad I came across this terrific book. The analysis and advice may seem commonsensical, but that is exactly the point made by Ben Dattner --we are so obsessed about blaming others that we often forget common sense when trying to deal with problems. I just wish politicians could learn from this gem of a book and focus on finding solutions instead of spending their time and energy assigning blame and taking credit...
November 14, 2011
An excellent business psychology book that ultimately offers sensible and practical albeit difficult advice.
June 6, 2012
This is one of the most useful books I've ever read. As someone who tends to take office politics personally (and seriously), I gained a lot from Dattner's insights. A must read!
June 12, 2012
This is a really good and interesting book about what really motivates people and how understanding that can help you in the workplace. Convincing and interesting from start to finish.
July 23, 2015
As someone who has often seen his need for credit be a huge motivating factor- much to my detriment- this book is a revelation.
ESSENTIAL.
ESSENTIAL.
December 24, 2020
The book has some key insights on understanding why and what of office, but fail short on how. At the end it tends to become more instructional with less science and effectiveness of them.
April 20, 2024
I'd seen this book referenced in other books and articles that I've read. It appears to be mostly based on his experiences which appear to be fairly limited. It felt like he described a lot of blame scenarios but didn't really delve into anything substantial. It's a solid meh for the materials.
However, I almost put the book down when he got into an early example of blame in the office setting.
Dattner selected as his example two female brokers. Just out of curiosity I looked up the stats for women brokers ... somewhere around 14%. Dattner had to look long and hard for this example. In another case, he uses the term 'ice queen' for a woman. As a woman in a primarily male dominated field of tech, for the most part, we women stick together. The aggression and blaming are male-on-female - overt, sneaky, micro- and macro-aggressions are still commonplace.
I was appalled and shocked that such a book was published by a major press in the last few years. Did a woman not review this for him?
However, I almost put the book down when he got into an early example of blame in the office setting.
Dattner selected as his example two female brokers. Just out of curiosity I looked up the stats for women brokers ... somewhere around 14%. Dattner had to look long and hard for this example. In another case, he uses the term 'ice queen' for a woman. As a woman in a primarily male dominated field of tech, for the most part, we women stick together. The aggression and blaming are male-on-female - overt, sneaky, micro- and macro-aggressions are still commonplace.
I was appalled and shocked that such a book was published by a major press in the last few years. Did a woman not review this for him?
June 14, 2017
Very interesting to read this at the time of the London attacks and the British Elections.
April 27, 2021
This book provides great insight on how to recognize when credit and blame is being misused and applying these principles in becoming a better leader.
August 4, 2011
I was disappointed with The Blame Game. Heck, I should blame myself for buying it.
Up until the last chapter, the author gives numerous examples of blame and credit hogs, often shows the negative effects of the same, sometimes gives you the end result of what happened, but rarely tells you how to address and deal with blame in the workplace. Then in the last chapter the author gives some overly simplistic tips and advice, justifying it by saying that there is no one size fits all solution. Which seems to be a wink and a nod that you should go out and hire the author's consulting firm to further deal with the issues the book raises.
The advice in the book is like getting advice from The Sphinx in Mystery Men. "He who questions training only trains himself at asking questions." "When you can balance a tack hammer on your head, you will head off your foes with a balanced attack."
I was looking for more.
Up until the last chapter, the author gives numerous examples of blame and credit hogs, often shows the negative effects of the same, sometimes gives you the end result of what happened, but rarely tells you how to address and deal with blame in the workplace. Then in the last chapter the author gives some overly simplistic tips and advice, justifying it by saying that there is no one size fits all solution. Which seems to be a wink and a nod that you should go out and hire the author's consulting firm to further deal with the issues the book raises.
The advice in the book is like getting advice from The Sphinx in Mystery Men. "He who questions training only trains himself at asking questions." "When you can balance a tack hammer on your head, you will head off your foes with a balanced attack."
I was looking for more.
June 6, 2012
I was lucky enough to get this early, before it becomes the bible for CEOs. 'The Blame Game' has already been helpful in my understanding of my own management style.
Its also given me insight into the nuanced dance between management and employees and among co-workers.
I am looking at my business in different light and anticipate a boon to my company's ultimate success, both in terms of employee satisfaction and overall production.
Highly recommend.
Its also given me insight into the nuanced dance between management and employees and among co-workers.
I am looking at my business in different light and anticipate a boon to my company's ultimate success, both in terms of employee satisfaction and overall production.
Highly recommend.
June 4, 2013
I spent alot of time with this book, and felt that the author and I had a remarkably similar perspective....
May 27, 2012
the argue that blame lead to a ditructive culture
February 14, 2018
By focusing more on themes than on details of examples, the author makes the advice much more tangible for readers. For my generation, the overall theme is well worn: take a little less credit than you think you deserve, dish a little more credit than you think you should. What the author does is provide a refined structure behind this theme.
The book is very good for the different ways in which You the reader can characterize the people you work with. By applying each approach, you will get distinct advice (provide opportunistic action items here, add an intermediary here). Those nuggets, and the theoretical framework that organizes them, make this book better than 1- and 2-star books in this category.
I didn't give a fifth star because most people reading this book have read 60% of it already. If this is your first book on management, this is a 5-star book. If you have, you should still read this book. It's not drowning in long examples or science. It's actionable passages in an understandable theme. The final chapter provides a great summary of the book too, so that lessons are reinforced.
The book is very good for the different ways in which You the reader can characterize the people you work with. By applying each approach, you will get distinct advice (provide opportunistic action items here, add an intermediary here). Those nuggets, and the theoretical framework that organizes them, make this book better than 1- and 2-star books in this category.
I didn't give a fifth star because most people reading this book have read 60% of it already. If this is your first book on management, this is a 5-star book. If you have, you should still read this book. It's not drowning in long examples or science. It's actionable passages in an understandable theme. The final chapter provides a great summary of the book too, so that lessons are reinforced.
Displaying 1 - 23 of 23 reviews