Monica Saigal Bhide's Blog, page 8

“A Life of Spice by Monica Bhide. Part memoir, part ode to eating, this sweet collection of remembrances and musings would make a great gift for foodies or anyone who’s simply a fan of good writing.”
 
THANK YOU to the Washington Independent Review of Books for including A Life of Spice on this esteemed list!!!


“A Life of Spice” by Monica Bhide (self-published, $10.99) – I need to preface this one by saying that I was a pupil at one of this engineer-turned-food-writer’s coaching sessions a couple of years ago and her savvy, upbeat mentoring was enormously buoying. This book of essays is assembled from pieces on her blog and stories she has written for national and international magazines, covering a range of topics — culture, family, love, identity, faith and writing — all of it liberally interspersed with short profiles of common spices like sage and fennel. Much of it funny and poignant, Bhide’s sixth book paints pictures of her relationship with her two sons, tells the tale of her father’s escape from Multan during the Partition of India, and reveals every cook’s insecurities in essays like “Why We Are Afraid to Cook,” a tale of the terror of making pad Thai.”

THANK YOU to the Atlanta Journal Constitution and Tampa Bay Times for including my book in their wonderful list!


The e-book is still on sale for under a dollar! I hope you will pick it up for the holidays!

(Thanks to Ana Borray for the gorgeous photo)
 

 

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Last year I ran a successful year-long program called Powered by Hope. The intent of the program is to help you follow your creative dreams by powering your spirit with hope! I am glad the program was so well received. This year, in addition to new posts, I will also be sharing a few of the best posts from the program. This month, you will get a post each Monday!

 

TRY

 

Reality, I have learned, is in the mind of the thinker. Case in point: I don’t know how to ride a bike. I never had the chance to learn when I was a child and then, after a certain point in my life, I felt like I was too old.

But then fine day, I decided that I would post on Facebook that I wanted to learn how to ride a bike and did people think I could do it. The answers were eye-opening. All those who knew how to ride a bike/had learned at an older age/were learning, all said: Yes, you can do it. Go ahead, get on. You will learn in no time.

And then came the other messages: Don’t do it, if you fall, you will break your bones and they will take forever to heal. And my favorite response: What is the advantage to you to learn how to ride a bike? You already drive a car so why bike. Also, You are too old, let it be.

Instead of learning how to ride a bike, I learned something even more critical about human nature: if we think we can do something, we will likely try it and do it. But if we think we cannot, we may never even try.

 

I think it was Henry Ford who said: If you think you can or you think can’t, you are right.

 

What are you trying to do that is different or new to you? I think you can do it. Do you?

 

 

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Am I hyperventilating? Why yes, I am!!!

I don’t have the words to thank you all for your love and support. This morning, The Devil in Us, a book that you all have loved and supported hit #1 on Kindle (for short stories, literary) and on Kobo for the same category. It is currently 87 on Barnes and Noble!

This has happened because of ALL OF YOU and your support of my books.

CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE

I am very grateful to you.

Wish you and yours a very happy holiday season and thank you for making mine a glorious one!

 

 

CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE

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My books – The Devil in Us (short stories) and A Life of Spice (food essays) are both on sale for $0.99 (for the ebooks) for the holidays! I hope you will help me spread the message!!

Both books can be found on Amazon, iBooks, BN, Kobo and other outlets.

Order now – $0.99 only – A Life of Spice

In A Life of Spice celebrated writer Monica Bhide explores her romance with food. As in any romance, there are moments of great heartache and unbelievable happiness; betrayals and breakups; and, of course, intimacy. The essays in this book show how food affects all the areas of our lives: family, friends, love, culture, faith, and more. They capture the delights of cooking as wooing and of food as nurturer, and the sadness of the heartbreak kitchen. This collection of powerful and thought-provoking vignettes makes us examine our relationship with food deeply—and what food really means to us. A Life of Spice gives readers a front-row view—and deliciously stolen peeks behind the curtain—into those choice moments that define a lifetime.

Celebrating the powerful memories of food that bind us all together, A Life of Spice features essays that first appeared on Monica’s blog and in national and international publications, as well as new, never-before-read tales of family and food.

 

Praise for A Life of Spice

“Monica writes stories about food, but often they are really stories about searching. She looks for what the world will reveal if you ask questions of the things we usually keep silent. She’s a generous writer, seeking the finer, richer sides of us.” — Francis Lam, editor-at-large, Clarkson Potter, and New York Times Magazine columnist

“Monica Bhide is more than a food writer. She’s a chronicler of culture and family history. She is a romantic for the bond between parent and child. She is an essayist of her own heart and mind, fearlessly searching for the truth in both. She is endlessly fascinating to read.” — Tim Carman, James Beard Award–winning food writer for The Washington Post

“Monica’s stories take us on a journey through time, across continents and cultures. With her we fast and feast for love, we share the wonder of fairy tales with a child, we feel the longing for a lost homeland, we delight in culinary discoveries, and we find our own identity in a new land. Throughout Monica reminds us that the essence of food is love—love for our family, our history, our humanity.” — Elise Bauer, Creator of SimplyRecipes.com

 

 

***** ORDER NOW – 0.99 cents ONLY  — The Devil in Us *****

The Devil in Us is a collection of stories about how your life can change in a second. There is a story of an addicted poet trying hard to find solace, a magical woman who can capture a dying breath, a widower learning to grieve. The stories all beg one question: what would you do?

 

It is with great pleasure that I share some of the endorsements that this book has already received:

“Monica Bhide’s short story collection isn’t impressive because it’s a first-timer’s effort—it’s impressive, period. The stories, each filled with strong, feisty characters and exquisite details of people, places, and things, will keep you riveted. There are plenty of Indian Americans writing novels these days, but far too few writing short stories and even fewer writing stories of this caliber.” — Sree Sreenivasan, co-founder of the South Asian Journalists Association and Chief Digital Officer at The Metropolitan Museum of Art

“This book and its characters will haunt you long after you finish reading it.” — Kathleen Flinn, author of the New York Times bestseller The Sharper Your Knife, the Less You Cry

“Monica Bhide’s shimmering short stories travel from Maryland to Mumbai and back again, effortlessly introducing us to soldiers and shape-shifters, hijras and housewives. With insightful grace, she illuminates the ordinary miracles and tragedies of suburban American life, intertwined with an India equally intimate and spectacular. Full of rich, delicate details and searing character portraits, these remarkable stories remind us of the demons we carry inside us on all of our journeys.” Annia Ciezadlo, author of Day of Honey: A Memoir of Food, Love, and War

“Monica Bhide’s excellent collection will transport you to unexpected places, moving you between America and India, hospitals, college campuses, ancient temples, a devastated train station. You will be entranced by the wide spectrum of characters she has created–a newlywed doctor learning to love his wife, a cancer survivor hoping for a second chance, a dying old man filled with hate, a transsexual who adopts a young orphan. Filled with surprises and heart, this book will pull you in and not let you go.”   Chitra Divakaruni, author of Oleander Girl and Mistress of Spices

“Monica Bhide’s wonderful, internationally-flavored collection is full of spice and life. The beguiling voice of a true storyteller will lure you out of your self into her intriguing, fictional world. Enjoy!”   Diana Abu-Jaber, author of Crescent and Bird of Paradise

 

 

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Last year I ran a successful year-long program called Powered by Hope. The intent of the program is to help you follow your creative dreams by powering your spirit with hope! I am glad the program was so well received. This year, in addition to new posts, I will also be sharing a few of the best posts from the program. This month, you will get four posts… the last four!

 

BE STILL

When my son was about five, I took him for a swimming lesson. I never learned how to swim and so I was determined to make sure that my kids did. He went into the water with his teacher and began to flap his arms wildly and, yes, panic. The teacher, kind as ever, kept saying, “Son, in order to make this work, you have to slow down. You have to learn to love the water and it will love you back. Just calm down and just be still. You have to learn to understand the water, understand how it behaves before you can control it. You have to calm down.”

Well, my son continued to struggle for a bit and the teacher continued to talk as calmly as he could. The lesson ended with a lot of little tears and a huge tantrum of never wanting to go in the water again.

When it was time for the next lesson, my son was adamant about not wanting to go. He hated the water, hated the teacher, he said. But I knew that it was fear that was taking over. We decided he would go and do nothing and just stand still in the water and if that was too much then we would leave.

As he got into the pool that day, I stood quietly and watched. The instructor stood with him and they both just stared into the water. There was so much noise around them as other kids and families played, swam and horsed around. Then the instructor turned to my son and said, “You know that you can lie on top of the water and if you are really still, you will float!”

My son stopped struggling and the instructor lay him flat on his back. The instructor had his arms under my son’s back. Once the little boy was floating, the instructor removed his hands and my son floated without flailing, without fighting, without failing.

 

There is power in stillness. Sometimes, when everything is fighting back, it is time to be quiet, to be still, to learn to float.

The stillness, I have learned, is where the magic happens.

 

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I am so delighted to let you know that my little book, A Life of Spice, is included in Huffington Post’s “Holiday Gift Guide for the Food Lover: Cookbooks!”

I am very grateful to Jamie Schler for including me in this list that features some of the best food folks of our time including  – Domenica Marchetti, Nancie McDermott, Maria Speck and many others.

 

 

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Last year I ran a successful year-long program called Powered by Hope. The intent of the program is to help you follow your creative dreams by powering your spirit with hope! I am glad the program was so well received. This year, in addition to new posts, I will also be sharing a few of the best posts from the program. From now until the end of 2015, you will receive a minimum of two posts a month focused on hope. I hope you will enjoy them and that they will inspire you to follow your dreams!

 

BE PRESENT

 

One afternoon, I was checking my email, watching the pot as curry simmered, picking up after my baby, mentally making a list of all that needed to be done that afternoon and pretending to listen to my eight-year-old son who reciting me a poem for Mother’s Day. Suddenly, my ever-polite, angel-like child yelled, “Mama, where are you? We are here … where are you?”

I stopped what I was doing and turned to my son. All of a sudden, everything around me seemed to slow down. His simple question had stumped me. I was everywhere but where I needed to be. I was working around them and for them but not there in spirit with my kids.

I went to my office, where I had placed a quote by Deepak Chopra on the wall.

 

Living in the present moment creates the experience of eternity. It is like every drop of water in an ocean contains the flavor of the whole ocean. So too, every moment in time contains the flavor of eternity, if you could live in that moment, but most people do not live in the moment, which is the only time they really have. They either live in the past or the future. If you could live in the moment, you would see the flavor of eternity and when you metabolize the experience of eternity, your body doesn’t age.

 

It clicked, finally. The author’s entire message clicked. And it caught me off guard. I had always read any inspirational book I could get my hands on—Deepak Chopra, Pema Chodron, Wayne Dwyer and so many more. I would find that I always felt good while reading the books and then once I put them down, I would begin to feel anxious again. I never implemented their suggestions. It always felt like another thing to add to my to-do list and if I am honest, I never felt I could meditate. My mind ran in 19 directions all at once and I did not have the strength, or so I felt, to quiet it down. The books promised a land of peace and I was scared—what if I tried and didn’t find it? Right now the books provided an illusion that perhaps someday I too could be peaceful like them. I had chosen not to even try.

As I looked around the room and at my kids, I realized I was doing a lot of “good parenting” but not really being there for them. I took great care of them but what I needed to do was be present with them when I was with them and shut down the electronic world, my future worry lists and my past hold ups and anything else.

I sat down feeling drained and then strangely relieved. I am a strong believer in the saying that when the student is ready, the teacher appears.

Chopra’s message helped me change my attitude and made me, and those around me, a lot happier. It began with smaller things. I decided not to give myself a hard time about meditation and instead began to simply focus on breathing. I wake up each morning and spend 20 minutes on focused breathing. I go out for walks and focus on nature—no iphones, cell phones, itunes, utunes, or any tunes. At least once every few hours, I remind myself to breathe. Sounds simplistic? It has made a world of difference. It is amazing how shallow my breaths were and now how less tense my body is.

 

Today, I as I write this, I am sitting at my dining table in my townhome in Virginia. I am staring out the gorgeous floor-to-windows to overlook a garden with vividly colored flowers and a spectacularly blue sky with a sprinkling of a cloud or two.

 

Today, I find myself present in my own life.

The post Be Present appeared first on Monica Bhide | Recipes, Stories, Inspiration.

Last year I ran a successful year-long program called Powered by Hope. The intent of the program is to help you follow your creative dreams by powering your spirit with hope! I am glad the program was so well received. This year, in addition to new posts, I will also be sharing a few of the best posts from the program. From now until the end of 2015, you will receive a minimum of two posts a month focused on hope. I hope you will enjoy them and that they will inspire you to follow your dreams!

 

BE GRACIOUS

 

“Oh, this has high-fructose corn syrup in it, I don’t think I can eat this.” remarked a business associate when I presented her with some beautifully packaged home-made peanut brittle that I had purchased from a woman who had just started her own brittle-making business. At first, I was taken aback by the reaction. But then I was just annoyed—it was a gift. She could have taken it, said thank you and then thrown it in the trash when I left; that would have been gracious. But no, she made a point to turn the package around, read the ingredients list on the back and then scrunch her face and make a rude remark. (And no, she is not allergic to corn syrup.)

Webster’s defines graciousness as being good and courteous, and to a point I agree but I think there is so much more to it. Graciousness brings with it a certain polish, a charm that touches us. Gracious people are not just polite and kind—their share an attitude that spreads abundance of a positive spirit. Let me give you an example (or two).

When I lived in Cleveland, Ohio, several years ago, my husband and some friends and I went to a restaurant downtown for dinner. As we were waiting to enter the restaurant, it began to thunder, and rain looked imminent. A kind, tall and very handsome gentleman who was ahead of us in line to get in stopped, opened the door and held it for all of us to go in first, and said, “Please, come on in.” We smiled at him and entered. It was kind, you say? Polite? The man holding the door was a superstar, a renowned basketball player. We had no idea who he was until he entered the restaurant and heads turned.

Which brings me to my second example—I grew up in the Middle East, one of the most hospitable places in the world. I must have been about 16 when my parents, my sister and I were invited to a dinner at a friend’s home on a Thursday night. So we showed up at seven with hostess gift in hand. “I don’t see too many cars outside,” my dad commented, “I guess it is a small gathering.” When the hostess opened the door, wearing sweats, we knew instantly we had made a mistake in the date. Totally embarrassed, my ever-polite and gentle father said, “I am so very sorry, we thought the dinner was tonight.” To which the hostess smiled and said, “It is now. We are blessed that you have been sent our way this day. Come in and we will celebrate being together and eat whatever I can get out of the fridge.” It was one of the best evenings of our lives. Her graciousness touched me in so many ways—if her reaction had been merely polite, it could have made us feel like fools. As we were getting ready to leave, she thanked my mother warmly for the flowers we had brought. “You don’t need to bring a gift when you come, just your friendship is gift enough,” she said.

 

I end with these words that someone wrote in my memory book in high school. I don’t know if he is the original author of these lines or if he “borrowed “ them from somewhere. So with all due respect to the author of these lines, here you go: “Be a gracious person, for graciousness is a charm, that no friend can ever borrow and no foe can ever harm.”

The post Be Gracious appeared first on Monica Bhide | Recipes, Stories, Inspiration.

Last year I ran a successful year-long program called Powered by Hope. The intent of the program is to help you follow your creative dreams by powering your spirit with hope! I am glad the program was so well received. This year, in addition to new posts, I will also be sharing a few of the best posts from the program. From now until the end of 2015, you will receive a minimum of two posts a month focused on hope. I hope you will enjoy them and that they will inspire you to follow your dreams!

 

BE GRATEFUL

I was about seven when a young, newlywed, gorgeous Indian woman with a serious UK accent invited me to her house for a “special celebration.” It did not sound tempting till she told me I could not only bring friends but that she would serve my favorite foods.

A few days after accepting this lunch invitation, six of the nosiest, giggliest girls you would ever meet showed up at her house. Barely had we stepped in when we were asked to remove our slippers and then move onto a large balcony. There, her husband, an eye surgeon, came out and with a large steel pitcher in his hand and then began to wash our feet. I was mortified. My friends did not seem to care as they giggled and wiggled. Not me. Was he implying we were unclean?

The lady noticed. “Come, Monica, let me dry your feet and then we will eat.” I could smell the toasty cumin and hear the sizzle of the bread frying in the wok. It smelled good enough to forgive her husband’s thoughtless task. She used a small towel to dry off my wet feet.

We were then asked to sit in a circle and she began to hand out presents—a dozen red bangles, a red stole and a silver coin. We were restless as she tried to explain the reason for the gifts and the significance of each thing. Where was the wonderful food that we could smell?

She must have sensed it. She went into the kitchen and came back with tiny silver platters filled with black chickpea curry redolent cinnamon and cloves, golden semolina pudding dotted with sweet raisins and crunchy cashews, deep-fried balloon bread scented with cumin, lentil wafers, a mild home-made mango pickle and even a bowl of sweetened yogurt. As we ate the hearty and nourishing meal, she began to tell us a story about Kanjaks. Our group pretended to pay attention as we gobbled as much as our little mouths could hold. Kanjaks—young pre-pubescent girls—are revered in various parts of India as incarnates of Goddess. Girls are the very essence of purity and bliss, she said. The washing of the feet, the giving of the gifts, feeding us such a lavish meal—we were being treated like Goddesses, she said.

Recently when I was reminiscing with my mother about how great this lady’s food used to be. My mother turned to me, surprised that I had not understood the real meaning of what her friend had been trying to do. In India, where killing a female fetus was considered “normal” and boys were thought of as the more desirable offspring, she was reviving this age-old tradition to give little girls like me true self-esteem. To ensure, I think, in her own way, that when these Kanjaks grew up, they had the same pride about bearing daughters as they did sons.

 

And I thought I was there for the food.

The post Be Grateful appeared first on Monica Bhide | Recipes, Stories, Inspiration.

Last year I ran a successful year-long program called Powered by Hope. The intent of the program is to help you follow your creative dreams by powering your spirit with hope! I am glad the program was so well received. This year, in addition to new posts, I will also be sharing a few of the best posts from the program. From now until the end of 2015, you will receive a minimum of two posts a month focused on hope. I hope you will enjoy them and that they will inspire you to follow your dreams!

BE CURIOUS

Ah, boredom. When my kids are home for the summer, it takes about two hours for them to come running to me with a well-used complaint: “We have nothing to do, we are bored.” What I have learned is that there is only one antidote for boredom: curiosity. I introduce them to things they know nothing about. Can they build me a kaleidoscope using my broken bangles? Can they learn how to plant mint? Can they learn to say six new words in Chinese? Yes, it keeps them busy but it also makes them smarter. One summer, my older son learned card tricks by watching YouTube. He is quite an expert now!

Curiosity is one of the most important skills we can obtain, and yes, it can be learned. To nurture your curiosity, begin by always asking questions. You will be surprised at how much people don’t know and how much they pretend to know! Go to places you would not normally visit: a hardware store, a bird sanctuary, a temple, a hospital cafeteria. Look around and let yourself absorb the atmosphere. In the great words of Pink Floyd, “All you touch and all you see, is all your life will ever be.” So get out there and learn new things, ask loads of questions and, in your heart, be like the four-year-old who keeps wondering why the sky is blue and why leaves aren’t.

I cooked an Indian meal for Chef José Andrés recently, and the minute he stepped into my kitchen, his questions started: “How did you use the coconut in this bean dish? What is spice that I smell in this curry? What is the base for this curry?” Chef Carla Hall is super successful, cooking southern meals around the country and yet, she called me one day to ask about Indian cuisine and how she could incorporate Indian spices in what she does.

 

What are you curious about today?

 

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