C.C. Adams's Blog: C.C. Does The Write Thing, page 4

Shame on me. I forget the specifics, but it's probably around 2011 or so, downtown Chinatown in Singapore, at a restaurant I think was called Hunan Square or something. Where's that damned business card?

No word of a lie; I was passing through Central London one evening last week, clothes shopping. And on the way back, I slowed to take a picture of Ponti's - a restaurant in the back of Oxford Circus. Looking at the awning above the dimly-lit interior, and the clinking of glasses, and the lively atmosphere and the pasta dishes...

Excuse me.

Author and publisher Peter Mark May, who I love to bits and don't see often enough, had once said, "You can always tell when CC's written a story, because there are people eating in it."

Damn you, Peter Mark May.

This man has also maligned (in jest, I assure you) my love of pear cider; Kopparberg preferred. Although, deadpan referring to it as 'fruity cider' might be unnecessary, since cider is usually made with fruit, even if it's not apples. Anyhow.

From an author point of view, the better the picture I paint, the easier it is to draw you into the story. Not just the sights, but the sounds, the smells, the tastes, the sensations. 'The feels', if you will. Plus, I'm biased - I'm a foodie. I haven't always been a foodie. Certainly not as a kid. Back then, food was a necessity, rather than a joy - I'd eat to live. The runt of the litter, and kind of scrawny, I could barely use a knife and fork. I didn't have the strength and/or common sense to cut meat with the knife, so I used to hold it down with the fork and try and tear it apart with the knife. Which meant that - once torn apart - the meat would go skidding off my plate and across the table. Hardly a win.

By the time I was that much older and wiser, I had more of an appreciation of food. Not only from the point of view to lift weights - which necessitates good food if you're going to have the energy to do it and grow, but also from the point of dating. Maybe an old-school ideal, but the idea of taking a woman out to dinner is still a classic. And, biased as I am, London has places that hit the spot. Places that have made it into my fiction, so, yeah - guilty as charged. Like Ponti's in the back of Oxford Circus. The brunch/breakfast you'd get in there is top-notch - spinach and egg frittata is something to write home about. Which I wrote into There Goes Pretty.

Balthazar's in Covent Garden - another place that does a decent weekend brunch. No wonder it made it into the Semen novella when Vicki's out with the girls. The date that Samuel is late for in Misery And Other Lines is at the Cinnamon Kitchen, Bishopsgate (Liverpool Street, East Central London). FYI - I've been there for drinks, but never eaten. Poon's is a restaurant I took a liberty with - as per Downwind, Alice, it's in the back of Oxford Circus. I believe there used to be a Poon's restaurant in the West End many moons ago - but the layout (large windows with natural light, et al) is a nod to the Poon's that used to be in the Whiteleys (of Bayswater) Centre way back. The crispy fried noodles and straw mushrooms were always a winner.

Yes, I can use chopsticks.

As much as I'm a foodie, I'm not a snob about it. I'm as happy with fine dining as I am with a large chicken pie and baked beans from a supermarket. Of course, I'd add chicken to it - since they never have enough meat in. Which is one of the reasons why I love Lebanese cuisine - like Mandaloun in Shepherds Bush, West London; they're not known for skimping on the meat. Farrouj Meshwe (baby grilled chicken) or lamb kofta, with rice and salad. Maybe a mango lassi (like a smoothie) on the side. I'll usually get a main and a starter, just to make sure the meat quota's covered between the two of them.

Time abroad on holiday still means time with food. Toronto in the summer means I'm downtown at Richmond & Yonge getting a pancake breakfast at the Sunset Grill. And every summer, the staff recognise me, which is just humbling and cool. Some of the best food I've ever had? I'd cite the now-defunct Grillfish on Collins Ave, near South Beach (Miami):

Grillfish – Permanently Closed — Legendary South Beach Restaurant

...or Smith Street (Food Street) in Singapore. Where I got a bowl of egg fried rice as big as the wok the chicken, ginger and spring onion came in (see the picture at the top of this entry). I forget the exact name of the restaurant, but I'm pretty sure it was Hunan Square, or some such. Although I can't find the damned business card now...

I'm pretty open to trying new cuisines; if nothing else, it another aspect of ...sensory input that goes into a story and helps bring it to life.

So, yeah. Take that ...Peter Mark May.

#food #foodie #London #mandaloun #balthazar #poons #grillfish #miami #singapore #cider #Kopparberg

Even as I write this entry, I've got two horror films in mind. One is An American Werewolf In London (how many people forget the 'An'?) - the other one is the 80s remake of The Fly, with Jeff Goldblum and Geena Davis. With 'American Werewolf', part of what sells the film's narrative for me is the realism. Everything from the slow, grotesque and painful metamorphosis to Kessler's sheer disbelief, agony and terror that he's actually changing. Similarly for The Fly; where Brundle's terrible accident means he evolves/devolves into a creature which is just that - an accident/aberration - rather than a valid creature, along with his morbid fascination and desperation at the gradual loss of his humanity.

Such good storytelling isn't an accident. Time and consideration goes into it, along with research - one of the things I pride myself on.

Those of you familiar with my work will know the vast majority will know it's set in and around London. There are a couple of (short story) exceptions - bonus points if you know which ones. Even though I'm born and raised and live in the capital, there are elements of the city I can't just write about, and need to do a little research for. The last thing you want is a reader calling out major plotholes/inaccuracies in your work because you didn't do your due diligence.

From my earliest forays into writing, I appreciated the value of research. As a fan of much of Michael Crichton's work, I saw the benefit of it firsthand - how he blended fact with fiction; Jurassic Park is a good example. Similarly for Timeline; how it weaves modern science and medieval history into a work of fiction. One of my earliest stories, I Wouldn't Let You Die, is an example of dedicated research. Reading up on crop rotation and pest control, along with scarecrow usage - and even watching videos of a wheat field, just to get a sense of place. As well as how it might sound when the wind blows across the field and through the crops. All that for a short story of some 3000 words or so. So Dreamy Inside had me damn near inhale a bagful of Hotel Chocolat's finest, all in the name of research.

The more stories I wrote, the more I fell in love with the research element as a necessary evil. Yes, there's a rationale in creative writing to 'write what you know', but it's unlikely that you'd know everything related to what you want to write - especially for a work set in the real world. With works in the Sunset is Just The Beginning/But Worse Will Come mythos, I used to work near West Norwood Cemetery, which plays a major part in the mythos. Beyond that, I spent time researching the cemetery online, as well as walking the grounds (but not all 40 acres of it) and taking pictures and video as a way of capturing not only how it would look, but also feel. And this was before I realised that Friends Of West Norwood Cemetery do a free monthly tour of the grounds.

The internet might be a good start for research, with the likes of online articles and photos, but that's not always enough. For a story like Forfeit Tissue, this took more research; and involved approaching organisations for more insight and info. Some, like London Fire Brigade, were beyond helpful. Others, like a London hospital, not so much. Of course, such organisations have a job to do, and they're not obliged to help with your research, so you just accept and move on.

Thankfully, most organisations are happy to spare at least some time. In the case of London Fire Brigade, I made an appointment to see station staff, who were friendly and gracious and patient, while I took research notes. Also rewarding was the chance to hand them a copy of the book (Crossroads In The Dark II: Urban Legends, in which the novelette first appears) when it was published. Works, like the Semen novella, proved surprising in terms of research - not because I had to research pregnancy, contraception and such - but because this was my first time writing an animal character. Everything from what Max would eat, to his age and behaviour. That was an eye-opener.

Research, like my writing, has evolved. With the most recent work, Misery And Other Lines, this is possibly the most evolved and involved my research has been. Again, as much as I'm born and raised in the capital, there are parts I need to research to feed into the authenticity in the story. And because I love London, I need to do that and capture the sights, sounds, people, landscape and cultures that bring such a rich tapestry to the city. Based around London Underground, research was done, not too surprisingly, with TfL (Transport for London). Who didn't bat an eyelid (I think) when I said I wanted to find out how to transport a full-reticulated python on the network. I mean, I didn't transport one, but it's research for a story, so... Conditions of Carriage (if memory serves), is just one of the many research articles I have for that collection. Along with references from Zoological Society of London (think London Zoo).

Again, I need to give props to Rich Jones, who has knowledge of TfL, and consulted on the project to make sure that I pulled off an authentic representation of the network. Add to that the likes of station and platform layout, carriage fixtures (and this was the first time I read up on moquette fabric), inside of the driver's cab. Plus, given the cast of characters in the book, having other people read scenes and dialogue to make sure those characters were faithful and respectful representations, and not caricatures. So, yeah, a lot of work.

And of course, let's not forget that a story relies on its characters. As much as I pride myself on a diligent representation of London as a character, I'd be remiss if I didn't pay attention to the human characters in my work. They, too, get the white-glove treatment: pictures from newspaper articles and video footage of crowds, commuters, etc. where I can better visualise a character as I start to put a personality to them.

So.

Why would I mention all of this now, and post a picture of a library? Good question.

For the latest WIP (work in progress), I'm researching something older. Not modern day, and I'm not about to get medieval on your ass, but ...let's say somewhere in between.

For all the research I've done on stories to date, my current method(s) would have me covered. This time is different; which I why I hauled ass to Battersea Library, after locating the archive I was looking for.

https://www.better.org.uk/library/london/wandsworth/battersea-library

Very helpful it was too; a big thank you to staff for their patience and guidance, along with some deductive reasoning (because history can tell you a lot ...but it doesn't necessarily tell you everything). I can say it was a joy after days and weeks of trying to locate info you hope exists to find a treasure trove of it. Large plans and schematics on thick paper - and what appeared to be some kind of paper/linen; big enough to spread out on a desk, and use beanbag weights to keep them flat where they were creased. Old photos, newspaper clippings, brochures, handbooks, etc.

I can't wait to drop this story on you.

Because you can write 'what you know,' but research? Really adds weight to it.

#writing #research #library #battersealibrary #archive #miseryandotherlines #london #tfl #ZSL #londonzoo #londonunderground #hotelchocolat #lfb #londonfirebrigade #westnorwoodcemetery #fownc #butworsewillcome #sunsetisjustthebeginning #forfeittissue

Currently, it's evening on Boxing Day, and I've more or less wrapped the final draft and proofing of the novel. The same goes for the cover art, too, more or less. With another project in the bag - and at least a few days before I'd pick up any kind of beta reading (because there's one project I'm expecting to beta for another author), I can get back to the business of writing.

What does that mean?

1. Basic outlining for the next projects. Some authors are pantsers (as in 'they fly by the seat of their pants' and 'make stuff up on the fly'), where others will need to plot and outline exactly how that work of fiction will go. I'm somewhere in the middle of those two extremes in that I do outline my work, but not so rigidly that I can't throw a little improvisation into the mix. This also leads into:

2. Basic research for the next projects. I'm a stickler for research - even if it's stuff I'm fairly well-versed in, e.g. London's urban landscape; both literal and actual. As an author, what you don't want is for someone to read your work and call out some, 'nah, it doesn't work like that.' Of course, a reader might dispute the realism of your content (and personally, I love for my readers to discuss my work), but you don't want to be shown up as not having done your homework. The pay-off is that doing your homework leads to more more credible stories, and - ideally - more engaging ones.

Note that these two are the most important, because the writing is the bottom line. The be-all and end-all, the bread and butter, the alpha-omega. And the process is as simple as start writing something, finish writing something, and repeat. Also bear in mind that the regularity of work means people are more likely to buy into what you do, as opposed to you being a one-hit wonder, as it were. Of course, such regularity leads to a build-up of completed stories, which leads me into...

3. Shopping my work. In much the same way that you wouldn't buy your groceries just anywhere, or bank just anywhere, or travel just anywhere, etc., so it is with the business of publishing. In a market of publishers, you wouldn't sell your work 'just anywhere' - you'd look for something you feel is a good fit for you. Of course, you may not be able to sell your work 'just anywhere', but it's a business where - ideally - both author and publisher will gain. And because I write regularly, there's finished work that I can devote time to shopping around, rather than having it sit idly and not generate any business for me. What I also need to do is:

4. Review how I hustle. Because there's a truism in life that if you continue to do what you've always done, you'll continue to get what you've always got. The craft of writing is what I have a pretty tight handle on; even though my craft continues to evolve. Maybe not so much for the business side of things, the promotion and such. But what matters is recognising that, and re-working that; tightening my game. In addition to reviewing existing hustle is also...

5. Adapt into related areas. In particular, this is me doing a stint as part of the New Nightmares course on writing horror next spring. As someone who's clocked up hours of beta reading and supporting other authors (both non-officially and in an official/HWA capacity), this is a chance to give back to the genre, teach, and get rewarded for my time. It also helps me...

6. Be more visible. And there's an element of irony in that a black man in a genre that's predominately white isn't so visible, but that's not the thrust of this mention. No. Let's put it in context. As someone who's submitted a story to an open-invite anthology once or twice, I've been told on more than one occasion that, for a book that may have up to some 30 stories in it, they were picked from the better part of 1000 submissions. I'll wager that members of the indie horror community at large don't know that many authors - let alone the horror *audience* at large; the nine-to-fivers, kids in college, retirees, etc. So, among other things, I'll be at StokerCon in person for the first time, in June 2023. Not only so I can meet some of my peers face to face, but so I can be seen.

Because, as far as I'm concerned, I'm not seen enough. Nowhere near.

So when you see me, rest assured I'm putting in work. Because I am.

#horror #writing #newnightmares #stokercon #game #game101 #beta #betareading

photo credit: Clem Onojeghuo @ www.clemono.com

Only recently have I shared - as I often try and do - a link on social media about the tours that Friends Of West Norwood Cemetery do; the first Sunday of the month; and free tours at that. And then it occurs to me that I might not have gone into detail about my backstory with this cemetery. I did check my journal posts and couldn't find anything, and sure as hell couldn't remember anything, so here we are.

Let me give you some basic background. West Norwood Cemetery, as you might have guessed from the name, is a cemetery. Situated in West Norwood in South London, the cemetery is 40 acres of grounds that are host to tombstones, graves, monuments, tombs and catacombs. Not only is it big (and also known as one of London's "Magnificent Seven" cemeteries), it's old - having originally opened in 1837.

So where exactly do I feature?

In years long past, I used to work in West Norwood. There was a relatively small business park where I'd take a job in one of the businesses. In order for me to get to work, I'd take the overground train to West Norwood and then walk from the station to work. That walk took me past the entrance of West Norwood Cemetery, and even though that was wide and expansive, I didn't give it too much thought. But the business park I worked in was behind the cemetery, so I had to walk the length (or maybe it was the width) of the grounds - and that took a while. That was my first time it really piqued my interest; what with the high wall and everything. And then I turned right at the end of that long road, and walked alongside an even higher wall (and if you've read the stories in the Sunset Is Just The Beginning mythos, you might recognise this wall) until I could continue on and reach the business park and thus, the office.

The more I walked past this cemetery, the more curious about it I got. Eventually went for a walk on the grounds. What struck me about the cemetery is how vast it was - and still is. Once you get past the entrance, which is majestic in itself, the area immediately in front of you is of a decent size. Where the cemetery office is (if memory serves) along with space for vehicles to pass. Continue on and eventually you'll get to a fork in the pathway. Telling you this doesn't convey how vast the area is - but regardless of which path you take, you're going to be rewarded with a veritable sea of tombstones in greenery. Stretching pretty much as far as the eye can see. Tombstones, kerbsets, mausoleums, statues, crypts - all through trees, rises and mounds in the earth,. along with flowers, bushes and weeds. Let's not forget the catacombs either.

Since that point, I've written a number of works that feature West Norwood Cemetery as a character - I say character, because when I write, I want to convey, the ...well, the character of something. It doesn't matter whether it's a human, animal, monster, or a location, or whatever. Such things may have character and from an author point of view, I think they should. How else can the reader buy into them if they don't?

I digress.

Most notable are the works in the Sunset Is Just The Beginning mythos. While that's the short story that started it all, it's chronologically the third in a quartet of stories - preceded by Sanity Slips Through Your Fingers and At The End Of A Pistol (in the DeadSteam collections), and followed by the novella But Worse Will Come in a mythos that spans nearly two centuries. It was only after I'd written the novella that I'd then revisited the cemetery for another look around - and actually taken the cemetery tour.

I can honestly say I'm not biased; the tours are good. They're informative, there's a lot to see, the guides are knowledgeable and patient, and they take the time to answer questions. What I missed out on when I did the tour was actually seeing the catacombs; if memory serves, they were undergoing renovation when I last visited.

The more I write, the more likelihood there is of stories that will reference West Norwood Cemetery in some way. And, why not? No it's not the only cemetery there is in London, and it's not the only one I featured in my work. But it *is* the one I've featured most. I may very well browse the grounds again in the near future (since it may have evolved somewhat since I was last there); all part of parcel of writing. You know; pick up sensory reference material firsthand - the landscape, the sound, smell and feel of the place.

It's a West Norwood thing.

#westnorwoodcemetery #cemetery #sunsetisjustthebeginning #butworsewillcome #ilovelondon #fownc

Last year, for the first time ever, I carved a pumpkin. Years and years of watching kids - and adults - in the neighbourhood go trick or treating wore me down, and began to appeal to me. Especially since, after the trick-or-treaters went home, I'd then take a walk around the block (not a euphemism) and enjoying the quiet chill of the night air. Not every house had a jack-o-lantern outside, but the ones that did looked ...beautiful. Bordering on eerie.

Repeating that ritual year after year gave me the urge to finally carve one for myself - which I did last year. Not only did I carve a pumpkin, but I put it out on the front doorstep. Actually, I tell a lie - I carved two. I bought two in the first place, because the first one, while it was a carving pumpkin, wasn't terribly big. So I bought another one, hoping it would be bigger ...and it was no bigger than a tennis ball. And it wasn't a carving pumpkin either. As someone who lifts weights once in a while. let me tell you the second pumpkin took a lot of elbow grease to cut.

Anyhow.

What I didn't realise when I put my two pumpkins out last year was that this would be the beacon which drew trick-or-treaters to the house. Now I'd sit in the room nearest the door; lights off, window cracked open, speaker facing the window, creepy laugh track on YouTube cued up. And through the dark and cold evening, I'd hear my gate swing one, whispers approaching the front door, and then a knock (and it still baffles me why people don't use the perfectly serviceable bell. One of the best excuses I've heard is 'I didn't want to disturb anyone' - yeah, well, then you shouldn't have come here. Especially if your logic has that many holes in). So each time I opened the door, my bag of sweets got lighter until it was all gone. The last trick or treaters that turned up looked glum when I had to send them away empty handed - but at least by then I realised why they kept visiting.

So I brought the pumpkins inside the house, and made a vow that this year, I'd enjoy a quiet time with a jack-o-lantern myself. After all, I write stuff where the seemingly impossible comes to life. Stranger things may happen. And if there's any time for horror to really be in its element, wouldn't it be Halloween?

What also happened from last year is where the idea for the current collection, Misery And Other Lines, started to take shape. Even before then, I want to craft a collection, as opposed to 'throw' an assortment of stories together - but that's, well ...a whole other story. Not saying there's anything wrong with such an assortment, but it didn't speak to me. Throughout out it all, I'd only let two people apart from Justin (Sinister Horror Company publisher) be privy to what was really in play. Especially when the first draft was done.

One was Kev Harrison (and you can catch his review via Ginger Nuts Of Horror here).

The other being Kit Power, who was the only person I ever really considered to write the foreword; given that he not only likes at least some of my work, but gets what/how I'm trying to convey in it. Let's just say that I'm humbled and honoured that he was not only wowed enough by the work, but also agreed to the foreword. Both men were entertained enough.

With a work centred around Halloween, I carved my pumpkin - much better than last year, but still room for improvement. Truth told, I wasn't quite happy with it (so that's one to work on). As much as I love to lap the block and enjoy the night, the stillness, and the glowing jack-o'-lanterns in the neighbourhood, I wasn't in the mood tonight (partly because the night has me so busy). But, I did have an idea; a flash of inspiration.

What if I read to the neighbourhood?

I think back on earlier this evening - it was pissing with rain. Didn't stop the trick-or-treaters though; no. Those whoops and screams aren't fear; it's excitement. Joy. And it's pretty cool (despite the fact I might quip otherwise). My disclaimer upfront is that I write horror, it's not for everybody. My brand of horror isn't for everybody. That said, there are some sections of my work that might be deemed suitable by some parent or guardian, that I don't have to be set upon by a determined band of townsfolk with torches, pitchforks and clubs. All I'd have to do is sit with a lit jack-o'-lantern and one of my books, and read. Who knows? The kids might like it. The adults might be intrigued by it.

And the lantern?

We'll think it over, and table it for now.

#halloween #horror #london #miseryandotherlines #gingernutsofhorror #jackolantern

After much to-do with the convention being scheduled as 'on', and then cancelled as 'off' - FantasyCon was then back 'on' again. Reasons for the cancellation included the cost to the organisers, among other things, so there were some concessions this time around. There would be no Dealers Room. And the convention would be cut from the usual three days down to two.

Of course, I'd still attend anyway, because that's how I am; I do the rounds on the convention circuit where possible. I have my reasons. After all, I:

get to hang with my tribe and meet the usual suspects

and make new connects

and drum up new business

while keeping my ear to the ground about the state of the genre

all of which gives me something else to talk about (e.g. on social media, podcasts, etc.)

Plus, FantasyCon this year was set in my town (London, in case you didn't know) but I also have an upcoming book which had its pre-launch there. And that book, like most (but not all) of my published work, is set in London.

Anyhow.

With FantasyCon being cut from three days to two, I still had an early start to the weekend - since I'd made arrangements for the 3-dayer a long while ago. Friday afternoon saw me up in Central London hanging with Canadian author and poet Colleen Anderson and eventually getting a late lunch in at Mandaloun; a Lebanese restaurant in Shepherd's Bush. Talk of the hustle, state of the genre and joys of dating - in terms of slang, I think 'beardsplitter' doesn't have the might and majesty of 'twathammer' (sorry, Colleen). Afternoon gave way to evening and darkness where we finally found our way to Heathrow and to the Radisson RED Hotel (not the BLUE one where some convention folk thought the 'con might have been). From when I got in, I could see the place was massive; just saying it doesn't do it justice. Just one hallway alone looked like an optical illusion - it was that long. Anyhow. I managed to catch up with a few souls that night, starting with G.V. Anderson, who I've not seen in a few years, and Wayne Parkin.

What's notable here is that Mr. P is usually receptive of my work, but is also a big Spider-Man fan - and this was the first time we actually met after how many years. So it was good to finally kick convo in realtime: everything from state of the genre to favourite Spidey comics, et al. Also met the usual suspects; Andrew Freudenberg, Justin Park, Tracy Fahey, John Travis, Terry Grimwood, Simon Clark, et al. Cue the usual shop talk and mischief. What also became a theme through the weekend was the extortionate bar prices of the hotel; where the pub not a million miles away was mentioned in reverential whispers; "Three Magpies." To their credit, the food was good, filling - and, for me, that's a major ask - and cost half as much.

Saturday saw the event get under way officially with the standard panels, book launches, signings, etc. - as well as the BFS Award ceremony, which is usually on the Sunday afternoon rather than the evening before. Props to Justin Park for the magic trick before the award ceremony - I damn near wept laughing. Saturday, as with the night before, ended in the bar with the likes of Maura McHugh and Rachel Knightley (ladies, thanks for the chance to hang and chat - that was cool). The Sunday itself was good - which is when my debut collection had its pre-launch.

Prepared For Launch: among other things, a little audience participation with the chance to win prizes.

And then there was the signing.

The book, which is Halloween themed, has its official release mid-October. And let me tell you, this was truly a labour of love. As far as the launch was concerned, I appreciate it was a big ask. On the last morning of the convention, where guests are thinking about checkout, breakfast, how they're getting back to their own city ...and quite possibly dealing with a hangover from the night before, I'm just grateful the audience enjoyed themselves. Both the publisher Justin and I had a good time with it all.

The rest of that day was spent lounging - and in the Three Magpies with a lot of food, kicking convo on state of the genre, the craft of writing, exercise and injury, you name it. Props to the likes of Wayne Parkin, Tracy Fahey and Paul Feeney; I didn't bail out until maybe 18:30 or so. But then, I could afford to - for once, I was at a convention in my city.

Don't think I didn't mention *that* once or twice.

#london #fantasycon #writing #game

The face behind that of Freddy Krueger (along with Willie from 'V,' and a host of others: Robert Englund, in Q&A on the last day of FanExpo.

It's been 3 years since I was last at FanExpo in Toronto. And even since that visit in 2019, I had mixed emotions about it. On the one hand, there was some good; like the addition of sushi to the usual offering of pizza and snacks. Horror programming, such as a sneak peek at Mike Colter's 'Evil' and John Travolta's 'The Fanatic', and a Q&A with a renowned special make-up effects artist (and I forget the name). On the other hand, I didn't feel there was enough programming, whether it was Q&A sessions, sneak peeks of upcoming horror media, interactive attractions (e.g. one year had a coffin that you could bury yourself in and watch the mourners ...as well as the zombie flesh-eaters that followed, if memory serves).

Anyway.

I needed a holiday. Arguably, I still need one, but I've recently taken one. And with the urging of a number of people, most notably Mama telling me, 'you need a holiday,' I took one. Much needed downtime with friends I've not seen since 2019. In these times of the pandemic and the new normal, it was a relief to spend some quality time with them. Those friends are Canadian (and I'm the foreigner), but we all meet up in Toronto for a chance to hang out, get food and drink, hit FanExpo, etc. For my part, I wasn't really so fussed about FanExpo - not when I get hangtime with my friends, but it's something to do. As well as shop for Spider-Man t-shirts.

What is FanExpo? I'll let them explain it:

https://fanexpohq.com/fanexpocanada/about-the-show/

Part of the ambivalence toward FanExpo was down to the programming. Sure, there are the likes of Anthony Daniels - C3PO from the Star Wars franchise of films, or Robert Englund, from the Nightmare on Elm Street films. Both of them are very engaging and have many a story to tell. That being said, very little of the programming was stuff I 'needed' to see - it was more stuff that was 'okay' to see. Again, not a whole lot of horror programming/variety - certainly not compared to previous years. Sessions with horror veterans such as John Carpenter, Don Coscarelli, Bruce Campbell, and Tom Savini. Interactive props, from the aforementioned coffin to a confessional session (if memory serves) with The Nun; eponymous lead character of the horror film.

I have to give the nod to the likes of David Thirteen from the HWA's local (Ontario) chapter for trying to pull some of the HWA/horror programming together. Not an easy feat, and especially on an open stage in the midst of a crowd of some 140,000 people (which makes for a lot of background noise)...

https://www.tribute.ca/news/fan-expo-2022-in-toronto-comes-to-a-close-as-a-huge-success/2022/08/29/

Where the stage did come in handy was for magician Ryan Brown; who pulled some truly engaging sleight of hand; we're talking scarves, cards and doves. All while his sleeves were pushed up to his elbows. This was the first year I can remember seeing a magic act, and in the realm of horror (in terms of what sits beyond the boundaries of normalcy and natural), this was a welcome addition.

While it's good to catch up with peers, including Rodney V. Smith and Nancy Kilpatrick, it's a shame that there wasn't the 'after-hours' meet with the local chapter; a chance to talk shop over food and drink (and there's some damn good food in Toronto). Still, that part's not down to FanExpo.

From a pandemic point of view, I guess the organisers were cautious. Not only did ticket registration ask for name and email (which I'm pretty sure is new), but staff would also electronically sign you in/out of the event (and I'm sure that's new). Most of the attendees were mask-free and, certainly to accommodate queuing, the Expo staff would have you as close to your neighbour as you were comfortable with, since queue length was ridiculous.

For the record, this isn't me just letting a load off. I'm of the mind that if you don't ask, you don't get - so I've no qualms about speaking up. I have addressed concerns to FanExpo organisers previously (through the appropriate channels and all that), but this year didn't quite move me. Of course, I'm just one person out of how many thousands that attended. Maybe they got a better deal.

At least I got my Spider-Man t-shirts this year.

#toronto #fanexpo #hwa #horror #ryanbrown #coronavirus #covid19

Apparently, I do a lot.

Mama tells me that.

My close friends tell me that.

Once in a while, my peers may tell me that.

Despite all that I currently do, which includes the author side of things, an intense exercise regime (I'm known for not skipping leg day), overhauling the house, etc. etc. etc., I'm not so slavish to the craft of writing. I do have a life; a pretty well-rounded life, considering.

In author terms, there's writing, editing, shopping my work around, promoting my work, mentoring/guiding other authors - that's off the top of my head. My reputation as 'always working' seems to proceed me.

What intrigues me is that those finding out for the first time that I'm an author are surprised by how much work I've got published thus far (I've been writing with professional intent since 2009). Currently at a mere 27 titles, I wouldn't say it was groundbreaking; I'd say it was a start (and when my body of work fills not just a bookshelf, but bookshelves, I may be more content). Even among my peers, it might seem that I'm *some* kind of prolific. Even if I were to stop writing, I'd still have existing work coming down the pike, due for publication. From later this year to some point next year (or it may be the year after). I shit you not.

But here's the thing. Your output; your frequency and quality of work needs to be tempered with rest. Otherwise, the quality of your work might suffer. Can't be having that now, can we?

As an example: I'm not known for skipping leg day. For those that see me squat a poundage that starts to bend the bar at both ends, know this: that level of prowess is business as usual. Why? Because every damned session I clock in to lift, I'm repping that weight over and over. Time in the game. So while the uninitiated might ask how many days I train and be surprised when I say 'two days a week', they're not seeing the big picture. They're not seeing how long I've been doing the 'two days a week', they're not seeing how I fought for every damned rep, 'two days a week', and they're not seeing that when I could have been doing something more fun/chilled/you name it, I dragged my ass across town to that church of iron and put in work 'two days a week'.

For me, writing is no different. It's not just the hours you put in, it's the regularity.

I'd like to think I rest enough. Right now, I'm ...less exhausted than I have been of late; but I still recognise I need to rest. Thankfully, the current workload of edits should be wrapped in the next few days.

And then, I can rest.

Which, for me, usually means beta reading for my peers. It serves a number of purposes, from helping other authors to keeping my critical eye sharp for when I return to writing something new. My standard disclaimer when I whore myself out to beta is that I'll take on as much work as I can comfortably manage. Which appears to be a lot; for the most part, I work at pace. That being said, if I feel I need to rest (ha), then I'll have no qualms about stepping back and saying enough is enough. My time's valuable; I offer it, I'm not obliged to give it. Just taking a break from writing helps refresh and recharge me, which is a good start. And beta reading gives me time away from my own work in looking at someone else's.

I do, of course, actually take rest - and it feels pretty damned good. Everything from watching TV shows/boxsets and films, to hanging with friends, playing some bass. It's relaxing, refreshing; all the good stuff. I'm due back in Toronto at the end of August; the first time since 2019. A much-needed holiday where I get to hang with friends, get some eating/drinking done, head to FanExpo (because, among other things, I need more Spidey t-shirts), do a little sightseeing, etc.

But you know the silly part? I have to work hard at actively taking time away from something, because the output slows if I do. No, the rest isn't easy. Not at all.

#rest #writing #game #game101 #FanExpo #toronto

Lately, I'd been thinking about mirrors. And the idea that they're a reflection of the world around us ...until they decide to show you something different. For the record, I find them unnerving. Not always, but, yeah. Even in the light of day, I find them unsettling. More unsettling at night.

Looks like I'm not the only one.

From childhood, I can't remember having had such an issue with mirrors. And that's despite - for me - one of horror cinema's nastiest moments; in the film Poltergeist, where the guy's mirror reflection tears its face off. That scene made a big impression on me as a kid; even now, thinking about it, it's such a hideous and terrifying scene. It's brilliant. Outside of a horror film, I think I might have seen a ghost at around the same time in my childhood. This was one Christmas, where Mama had, as usual, put up the Christmas tree in the living room. And, as usual, switched the tree lights off, so the tree could be seen in the darkness from the evening street outside. And, as per usual, I'd go into the room alone in the evening to look at the tree lights. Only, on one particular occasion, I'd seen what I thought was a ghost behind the living room door.

Now, me being young and kind of impressionable, I bolted from the room. But, to be fair, we used to have a mirror that hung behind the door - so maybe it was the mirror playing tricks on me. And/or a trick of the light. But even then, I had no real issues with mirrors.

I honestly have no idea why that's changed over all those years.

In horror films, there's a trope where a character will look into a mirror, look away, and then look back - only for a monster to have revealed itself. A horrible-looking thing, no doubt; ruined, demonic, whatever. Such a physical appearance, to me, is icing on the cake. It's the fact that the reflection doesn't match the real world - or at least the perception of it. That's unnerving.

This was the selling point for me to go and watch Black Swan when it came out; Natalie Portman's character backed up to the glass as her reflection turns to look at her in contempt.

Fascinating.

As a kid, I was painfully shy and awkward. Now, as a grown man, I'm anything but. I don't spend a whole lot of time in the mirror, but I have the confidence and maturity to like and accept what I see. If I don't, then I can work on changing it, right?

But I don't mind telling you that each of those moments almost feels like daring the mirror to let its guard down. On some, 'here's what I think.' So there'll be times when I don't dare look at a mirror, especially if I'm alone in the house. At night. Or out of town in a hotel; during the day, let alone at night. Those mirrors have infinite patience; waiting for that moment to show you something you really don't want to see.

Let alone visit you on your side of the glass.

#mirror #horror #blackswan #poltergeist

Standard Operating Procedure: hangtime with my peers in the hotel bar, 2nd night of ChillerCon.

Originally to be StokerCon UK, ChillerCon has faced its challenges. Not only in part due to the pandemic, but also because a ceiling had collapsed in the desired venue. Of course, that leaves it no longer desirable, so the event was shifted from The Grand to The Royal. Both hotels in Scarborough, by the sea, and both within spitting distance of each other. I, for one, was actually looking forward to StokerCon being on these shores. If memory serves, it's historically been a North American thing, so it would be nice to have it - and that community - journey over here so we could meet the hell out of them. Oh, well. Just be it known that I'm looking to step to StokerCon in Pittsburgh next year. But that's a whole other story.

Back to the matter.

I'd not been to a convention since FantasyCon 2021 - that was in Birmingham last September. I'm aware that some of my peers haven't been to a convention since before then. But I'm going regardless.

So. Thursday morning, I'm up at Kings Cross, having already got my first train. For some strange reason, I can't get a direct train, which would have made things easier. Even when I fly - or, especially - I want the direct journey. None of this chopping and changing. But a local strike on the network that serves Scarborough meant a number of trains were cancelled. Which meant delay. And more people crowding onto the remaining trains. That part of the journey wasn't all bad though, since I got to travel the rest of the way with Sara Jayne Townsend, who I used to share a publisher with. Talk around productivity, the genre and such killed enough time until we got to the hotel. Of course, we already knew our hotel was changed, since we got the emails in advance.

View from the foyer. You wouldn't believe these creaky-ass floorboards though - seriously.

We finally get to the hotel - where I check in, and she dashes off to make her 3pm panel. I catch some of the usual suspects, such as Paul Kane and Marie O'Regan, husband and wife, and joint heads of the HWA's UK chapter. Throughout the day, more familiar faces turn up; the likes of Kit Power, Dave Watkins, Dave Jeffery, etc. Time in the hotel restaurant saw us murder some food, with me also inhaling as much chocolate cake in addition to a well-rounded meal. And getting the side eye from wait staff for asking for a picture. Not that I wanted to take their picture ...but that's what they seemed to think. This was also the time when I heard "ABBA" and "motion capture" in the same sentence, and damn near pissed myself laughing. This day was also the first time I finally met Gemma Amor. An absolute joy - this woman has bags of game. Standard operating procedure for a convention; to meet the usual suspects and make new connects. Every once in a while I get asked what I get out of going to a convention. I'll gladly tell you, but bear in mind - as per the U.S. expression - your mileage may vary:

1. I get to catch up with my peers. This includes, but isn't limited to: Phil Sloman, Dave Watkins, Georgina Bruce (who I've not seen in too damned long), Kit Power, Justin 'JR' Park, Duncan Bradshaw, Gareth Spark, Kelly White, Glynn James, etc.

2. I make new connections. This includes Lena, Alexa, Tom, Trevor, Kayleigh, etc.

3. I get to catch up on current affairs in the genre. Hell, I did that on the train journeying up.

4. I pick up new business. In this case, an invite to a new project - and I already have an idea in mind.

5. I get something else to talk about/new content for my audience. Just like I'm doing now.

I honestly don't know if we're coming or going... Time on the Making A Monster panel.

I was only on one panel this weekend, around Making A Monster. I don't mind doing a panel or two but for the most part, I go to the conventions as part of the crowd, not part of the programming. It's just cool to catch up with my peers. Four days of panels, discussion, Q&A, workshops. And food (man, I would've eaten my weight in fajitas from the hotel bar), cake, camaraderie, and shenanigans.

Job done.

#chillercon #hwa #game #shenanigans #writing