Terminalcoffee discussion

I think I've been a workaholic for many years, but the pattern caught up to me perhaps five years ago and I've taken steps to avoid that pattern. It also helps that I've been at my job for almost eight years now and I know the system well enough to get things done without working all the time. I'm reading a book about this guy from Microsoft who started a nonprofit who almost pees himself with glee when describing Microsoft's workaholic culture. He portrays the culture as full of dedicated, "get things done" people. I also read this article this morning...thought it was interesting:

http://www.cnn.com/2009/LIVING/workli...

A couple questions...

Are workaholics praised more often than not in our culture?

What are the pros/cons of working so much?

What else comes to mind?

At last, the right words struck me. "No matter what the request," I wrote, "Megan's answer is always yes."

this should help with the dating scene

ok, my serious answer:

i considered myself a mild workaholic at my last job. 19 yrs of busting my hump for the man and then the place got bought out and closed down. my current boss is a friend of mine who works very hard for long hours SO that he can take lots of time off for personal activities and such frequently. i totally like that idea as my job does not define me, who i am defines me. work provides income which is a resource for doing that. not that we should not do our best but if you kill yourself working no one says that "that was exactly the way to go"

(fortunately my job now entails me being online a bunch so i can still do some personal stuff at the same time)

I was until I married and had children. I think one thing I took from the book "Titan" is that workaholicism may be a cause for unstable children.

Yeah, Once I had kids I went looking for a job that allowed me all the time off I wanted to be able to attend all my kids events. and then if needed work on off times.

RA - in factories there seems to be a culture of workers who compete to see who works the least amount. they brag about how little they do and who in fact works the least. seems to me the people who are workaholics are either people who think they have a chance of moving upwards in their field (factory workers get paid the same generally no matter how hard they work) or people who just have so much energy that they don't know what else to do with it

I'm so very much not a workaholic. I inherited a cat-like tendency from my mother to veer towards activities that have me in a reclined, warm, inert position. I also purr when stroked. I do not ususally feel incredible amounts of guilt when I'm not at work or preparing for work, or not thinking about it.

Not that I don't get s*** done when I have to. But I don't go out of my way to be productive every moment of every day.

I'm with Sally. No, literally. ;)

Okay, I'll be serious. Not a workaholic, but once I've started a project, I would prefer to keep working on it until I've finished, which can appear like workaholicism at times.
But, like Sally, I also love to curl up and purr.

my dad is a workaholic.....

somebody mentions work and he gets drunk

(ba-doom-pa)

Ha! (groan)

I believe a true workaholic (like my Dad) is one who's entire being is centered around productivity, i.e. their job or serious hobby. Growing up my father believed (and still believes) his main responsibility was to earn money to provide for his family and lecture us on the ethics of work. I think they obsess about things like money & work, usually are type 'A' personalities, and often-as-not are completely cut off from their own emotions & ability to show emotion/nurturing to those who should be closest to them. This also stems from a deep-seated insecurity/self-loathing of who they are inside (hence the need to overcompensate on the outside) and subsequent fear of facing those insecurities of not being worth anything.

So, now I'm trying to decide if I'm saying all this from the perspective of being on the psych-couch or the counselor's chair. (Ironically, my Dad is a psychoanalyst)

I feel guilty when I curl up and purr. How do I get past that?

I want to think about Sherrie's comment a bit more before I respond. I did work really hard to try to prove myself...maybe there was some self-loathing involved in that...definitely insecurity...

tranquilizers?

I am quite the opposite of a workaholic. I have no problem disengaging rom work -- BUT, when I get involved in work stuff that is fulfilling, I tend to put a lot more time/effort into it.

Hours worked does not equal contribution made to the effort/result. I just try to put a lot more heart into what I do when I do it, and then it is much more effective, and I can go home and have a drink and unwind at quitting time. I LOVE quitting time.

I think I am average, in that I work hard when needed, and try not to get to wound up in it.
However, I HATE making mistakes at work...it makes me feel so crappy.
That is where my insecurities and guilt kick in. And it doesn't even have to be a big mistake.

Well,Jules, that's an easy one. Don't make mistakes.

I try!! I really do!
Uhg, when am I gonna become perfect already?

That's all you can do. If you know in your heart you're trying, then you can tell yourself you are not worthy of guilt. Self talk is your friend, if you use it right.

True dat.

I don't know why, but you just made me talk(write)like I am from tha 'hood.
(and I'm not even sure what that means)

Yo!

(Thumps chest) Peace out Yo! Julie, you are a fly girl, TRUE!

Ok, to clarify my psycho-babble ramblings above. I should have made a distinction between a true workaholic and a perfectionist.

I think if you're a perfectionist you can get so caught up in making things, well, perfect... tweaking this & clarifying that (yes, I am one) that it comes off as workaholicism because of the amount of time you might spend on a project. But, you can put that same quirky psychosis into playtime too.

Workaholics seem to have a deeper level of dogged work ethics driven by guilt or repressed inadequacy.

Sorry bout the confusion, dudes.

sherrie - you don't look at each one of our responses and totally analyze it psychologically do you? yikes, i have to start thinking through my words a little more carefully....

i do love how you say something incredibly profound and then say "dudes" or "bullcrap" or something like that :)

julie- from the hood and misunderstood

Yes, Sherrie is pretty cool that way.

FYI, I been stayin in da 'hood fer 11 years, dog. Bought me a house an everthang. For real.

Dawg, Sandy. Dawg.

LOL Yea, it's my nature as a shrink's daughter. Sometimes my hubby has to tell me to 'Just Stop and Let it Be'. It's pretty scary.

But, I'm the hardest on myself so anything I psychoanalyze for you will be super-sane by comparison.

hmmmmm. now wondering about your take on me

LOL Yer cool. :)