I read both the samples and I have to say neither seem well written. The first chapter sample uses the term "puncture" which is the British term for what we Americans call a flat tire. Translation One made a little more sense, but there are some odd sentences in there that don't make sense. Are you planning on separate editions for UK and US?
The dialogue felt stranded without any setting or character description. It's hard to know if the translation is just failing or if the novel needs a little tweaking. Did you work with an editor?
The dialogue felt stranded without any setting or character description. It's hard to know if the translation is just failing or if the novel needs a little tweaking. Did you work with an editor?