Book Haven discussion

I've always been interested in what makes people tick and sex i a major motivator. So I would consider reading such a book...with hesitation. Here is my hesitation (if I can figure out how to appropriately voice it and I'll admit to some sweeping generalisations). Sexuality in the West is very male centred. So much so that we (women) often don't even realise it. What we are taught to view as sexy, or what behaviour is seductive, or what we should enjoy, etc is often centred on arousing a male. In many cases women have simply incorporated the sexual themes around them as their own, but they often were initially intended as arousing to men. I suspect that this is some of what you would address in the book with or without calling it that.

Though things are changing women have historically been allowed very little sexual expression of their own. Women simply weren't allowed to be openly sexual and maintain a wholesome reputation. Hell, even lesbianism has been adopted as stimulating for men. Apparently we can't even loose the male purview when we cut them out of the picture entirely. I say all of this because it has been my experience that a lot of sexual self-help or how-to guides for women actually just rehash the same old same old. "Give your man a strip-tease." "Get yourself some sexy lingerie." Yes, the woman can enjoy this. I'm not claiming they can't or don't, but it's still just more of the same. So, if the above book could address actual women's sexuality and not how women can enjoy their sex by better pleasing their partner I would read it. I suppose I'm trying to say that it's a matter of emphasis. Whose enjoyment is being emphasised in the book. Obviously both parties should enjoy it, but if the book is intend to help women identify their own sexuality I would need to see that as the primary focus.

Does that make sense?

I don't read those kinds of books, but I have a friend who wrote a book a few years ago and it was violent. He wants to publish, but doesn't want people to read it and think he is a sadistic psychopath. (Come on, we've all thought Stephen King has got to be one weird dude!) I told him to publish it under a pseudonym and he can do interviews all over the place without having to be "known" as the author. Heck, with the advent of e-signatures, he doesn't even have to go to bookstores to sign copies! He can host on-line book signings. It all applies to you too (well, except the thought that people might think you are a sadistic sociopath!)

Heidi: In today's marketplace, your friend's book and Sadie's book should thrive. Just take a look at the best seller lists: the 'Gray' books, at least one of Gillian Flynn's books (the one I read) revolves around sick and sadistic people. The pseudonym route is a good idea.

That is what I told my friend. I mean, I'm not usually into those types of books, but I was engrossed while reading it. I could understand why the sociopath did the things he did and that kind of scared me. Any time a person can write a book that makes the reader question their own preconceived notions of right and wrong, that is signs of an excellent writer. A shame that his fear of public approval may very well prevent him from publishing.

Hi Heidi, One of the reasons I write thrillers is because of the violence in the world. Too often it touches our ordinary lives. I've lived in towns which have had notorious serial killers and I've seen how fear alters the way people live. I've experienced violence and so have some of my acquaintances through the years. We truly don't understand the human psyche.
As for sex, I'm not into reading a whole book about it (my Midwest upbringing) but as long as it isn't promoting violence against women, I can't be disapproving.