Terminalcoffee discussion

At least a couple times a year, and it's happened three times already this year, someone with whom I grew up in Chicago or with whom I work in Milwaukee seriously considers moving to the small town where I live. Apparently a big part of the perceived draw is the lack of crime and the presence of safety. A lot of people around here say things like "we never lock our doors" or "I always just leave my keys in the car" and the police blotter usually features incidents like barking dogs and kids squealing their tires in the high school parking lot.

I mean, that's cool and everything, but I still lock my doors. Why risk it? Well, I don't lock the (detached) garage door, but that's because I'm too lazy to have to unlock it every time I need the car. I'm not sure I could sleep if I didn't lock my doors. I'm sure even a slightly professional thief could break into my house, but I'm sure a slightly professional thief would pick somebody with cooler stuff, too.

When I'm out in public I have the eyes of a son of a former Chicago cop who grew up in the city. I'm friendly to people, but I'm always on guard. Crazy people can be anywhere. I don't mean to sound paranoid. You know what I mean.

Question...how security conscious are you, both at home and in public? Have you ever been mugged/burgled? I love the word "burgled", by the way, but then again, I've never been burgled. Someone once stole my bike in front of Chicago's Art Institute. That sucked. But otherwise nothing has been stolen.

And...you?

i am not at all. we NEVER lock our doors at home and the keys to my truck are ALWAYS hanging in the ignition (so i won't lose them). i inherently trust everyone as i pick up hitchhikers and stop to help everyone stranded along side the road and i stop and talk to most everyone downtown or whatever. of course i live in a small town but i have been the same way in big cities around the world (although not CHI or NYC). once my wife's purse was stolen from our car in our drive-way but besides that nothing else has ever happened. i am not naive, just optimistic about people

Living in Baltimore being security conscious is a given. My touring van was stolen from in front of my house a couple of years ago (during my birthday party...sigh...)
but other than that, thankfully, no issues.

Coming from Manhattan, I have a very false sense of security here in Seattle, which really pisses Richard off. I'll leave my car unlocked running quick errands, leave doors open for a breeze, and most especially leave windows open all night if I could my Richard won't let me, even on days like today when it's 86. The windows I leave open are behind tall bushes where no one could really get to, the others have screens which would make noise and I have a big mean looking German Shepherd. Granted, Raider would probably be wagging his tail, but that's not really common knowledge. :D Seriously I do think that if he felt we were threatened in anyway, he'd become quite threatening. At least I hope.

My husband is almost as bad, Lori. Another son of a police man - he's way too aware of all the horrible things that could happen. He insists that we keep the doors locked all the time, both in the car and at home. Usually, I'm okay with that, because I can see his point. An ounce of prevention kind of thing.

It bugged him last weekend when I insisted on leaving both the front door and the side door unlocked while I was scrubbing the front of the house. I really didn't want to have to tromp through the house to get to whatever I needed while I was half-soaked from the hose.

He's okay with the windows being open, though. At least, upstairs.

OH man, I'm such small fry fish compared to you people. I'm not worried about crime or being robbed or anything. I lock things, my car, my house, my office, but I've never heard of any of the above being stolen/broken into here. Sometimes methy teenagers will make up door-to-door scams, so I don't deal with solicitors, but that's about it.

I live in a pretty safe town but we still lock the doors...I was brought up that way and probably always will. I have no problems leaving the doors open though if someone is home.

I used to have a friend in the next town over and his family never locked the doors...and they didnt want you to knock when you went over there...just walk right in. I always found that a little weird.

I now always lock the doors to my car also. I didnt before when I had my previous car because in the winter the locks would freeze and I couldnt get back in...so I never locked them @ all...when I was living in Lowell (which is not as safe as my hometown) for school I had 3 or 4 cds stolen from my car and once some one pulled out all the fuses and left them on the drivers seat...man were they a pain in the ass to put back in. After that, once I got a car that had locks that worked...I locked it.

I lock everything just in case. Here in Humboldt we have some problems with Meth/homeless people.
It depends on where you live though. I just moved to a pretty nice neighborhood, and I would not worry very much to leave my door unlocked at night. However because I live alone (and am a girl) I always lock the doors anyway.
Being a girl is definitely different, what with rape and whatnot. I won't pick up hitchhikers even as much as I see them and really think that they are college kids wanting a ride up to Arcata or wherever.
On that note, Kevin, would you be okay with your daughter picking up a hitchhiker if she was alone in her car? (just curious)
It sometimes sucks to be a girl.

I never lock anything. Except for my car when I park it.

Julie, I know what you mean. It is different when you're a girl. You have to be more aware of your surroundings, and use more caution, even if you don't want to.

We make sure to lock the doors & secure the security system every night. Salem isn't a small town anymore, but I think many people still think of it that way. We've had some break-ins in the neighborhood in the past few years, so I think the reality of security has had to sink in.

Now, my husband was raised to be very security conscious, partly because he's lived in almost half the states in the country & they've had to be. I think a lot of it has to do with where you grew up & how much of an issue it was to create habits surrounding security.

julie - my daughter rolls down her window very slightly and keeps the door locked and asks if she can call someone to help. she once stopped dating a guy who refused to even consider helping someone who was broke down. you can still be cautious but kind

Well, yeah. If someone was broken down on the side of the road, but that's different than just a hitchhiker.

yup. different. that is a choice she would have to make herself at that time. i would not tell her not to help someone. i would tell her to be careful and do the right thing (for her and for the hitchhiker)

I keep my doors locked in my car and my house. We came home one day about 15 years ago and the house was trashed, an easy chair wedged behind the front door. Our stuff was every where. Underwear on the livingroom floor, papers everywhere. We found part of our stereo in the back yard.
So, my ex decided we had to have a security system. I hated it. I felt like I was the prisoner. Once you set it, you have 45 seconds to get out and God forbid you should ever have to go back in your house after you just left your house. Now that I have my own house--not with him--I don't have a security system. But I do keep things locked.
There is a lot of crime in certain parts of this town and a lot of gang murders. I never realized how much violence goes on here until I started working at the hospital. It's scary. And of course, it's worse in some parts of town, but no part is immune. I feel safe here, in this house. No one--stranger or friend or family--has ever done anything bad to me here. I hope I always do feel safe here, that that never changes.

Very security conscious. Deadbolts on front and back doors. If a stranger comes up to me on the street and starts a conversation, I put a hand on top of my purse because who knows if it might be a purse snatcher. In cities they work in pairs, one will chat you up while the other one picks your pocket, as you're concentrating on what #1 is saying.

It's pretty rare that my house is ever locked. We don't have deadlocks. RA there is no need to bring the bolt cutters with you, just walk right in. The beer fridge is in the garage.

But you don't have any crime in Australia, do you?

Being of mostly convict descendants we have been cured of the habit.

I'm paranoid. I'm convinced someone is always lurking around my house and that almost everyone is up to no good. I've been in law enforcement in various capacities for close to twenty years- people scare me. I always have an intimidating, large well trained dog with me- so I generally don't get approached. When I don't have my dog and I get approached, I tend to stare the potential bad guy down. I make sure they know I am sizing them up and noting everything about them.

If my father sees someone just sitting in their car, anywhere, he assumes they're casing the neighborhood. He won't leave his house if he sees anyone on his street sitting in their car.

Lobstergirl wrote: "If my father sees someone just sitting in their car, anywhere, he assumes they're casing the neighborhood. He won't leave his house if he sees anyone on his street sitting in their car."

They probably are. I usually walk up to their car and ask if I can help them. If I'm leaving the house, I'll stop right behind them and take down their plate number, just so that they know that I know what they're up to.

In my defense, my old neighbour was a peeping tom. I caught him walking up my driveway and lurking around in the dark twice. Both times I waited until he got up beside my truck and set the panic alarm off. It was fun. Luckily, he didn't dare go in the yard because of the dog. He was a creepy creeper from creepville.

He takes down plate numbers.

Taking photos sometimes scares them off, too.

Oooh, I hadn't thought of taking pictures. Excellent idea, that is what I'll do from now on.

It's pretty safe here, we lock the doors at night and when we're not home, mainly because the insurance won't cover thefts if the doors aren't locked.
If I'm walking alone on the street in Copenhagen at night, I'm aware of what goes on around me, but that's about it.
My father has been mugged in Milwaukee once, and a few times here in Denmark, but he drives a cab at night, so he meets all sorts.
MY husband had his laptop stolen from his car once, and he always get his bikes stolen! But apart from that no incidents.

I no longer put laptops near windows, I make sure I know where the security exits are, and I sit facing entrances. I'm a paranoid teenager.

i had my truck broken into right in my driveway 2 weeks ago and i still don't lock it and i leave the keys in it. i am not sure where our house key is and i occasionally walk down dark alleys with benjamins hanging out of my pockets

I always lock my house and car doors. I may live in a small, rural/exurb town now but I spent 24 years in big cities. I also make sure I park the car in well lighted areas and try to travel in pairs whenever possible. I hold my keys ready in my hand so I don't have to fumble in my pocket or purse for them. I wear shoes I can run in easily and no tight skirts for freedom of movement. I always check the backseat to make sure no one is hiding there.

i would hate to live like that

Everything's locked up around here like Fort Knox.

yeah clark, i was working up in detroit at the old bosch plant last year and stopped to get lunch at a place near there. you had to slide your money through a plexiglass slot and they sent your burger out through some bars. i guess you can't order a double cheeseburger as it wouldn't fit through the hole

I can't tell if you're joking, Kevin.

nope. usually i am but this time i am not

I am pretty security conscious... I lock my doors and check my basement every night before I go to bed to make sure there isn't a weirdo down there. I also have an alarm system for the house that is set when I am away or at night. At night, I like to randomly flip on my flood light in the backyard just to make sure there isn't anyone lurking on my lawn.

@Helena, I think that working at the DA's Office and the police department made me less paranoid! I know that here in the Portland area, stranger to stranger rapes are uncommon (that is my freakiest thing) and that makes me feel better.

We're locked up. We have a security system, but stopped using it when grandpa moved in. He's too likely to trigger it from inside.

Back in '91 I lived in a large house in Redmond, WA., with three other people (all female, woo-hoo!). The youngest once left a window open downstairs & we were burgled. Everyone lost a piece of jewelry or two, and all of my bicentennial coins were taken. Total loss for me was about $600.

Kevin "El Liso Grande" wrote: "nope. usually i am but this time i am not"

I'm about 25 miles west of the heart of downtown, but I grew up in Dearborn which borders Detroit JUST to the west. The city I live in is usually amongst the top 25 on those safest cities lists, but force of habit from my childhood leads me to still batten everything down.

That story about the cheeseburger doesn't surprise me. We used to go to a lot of concerts here back in the early 80's, near the intersection of Chalmers and Outer Drive, hands down the worst neighborhood in the city. At the time, Harpo's was owned by the Vigilantes, a nice group of young men who bonded over a common love of motorcycles. They used to patrol the parking lot with guard dogs. Even they were scared shitless.

Oh, speaking of burgers!

When I was four years old and we lived in Chicago, we were eating at Burger King and a homeless man walked up to where my mother and my sister and I were sitting. He stuck his hand in my fries, took a handful, stuffed them in his mouth, and walked out the door.

Sarah Pi wrote: "Oh, speaking of burgers!

This story makes me gag just a little bit.

Don't gag. My mom threw out the rest of them.

i'm extremely security conscious. our security system is tested on a monthly basis, all the doors and windows are locked and covered especially overnight or when i'm gone, i have to put the alarm on my car even if im just going return a movie or something, and if my parents are leaving i will have them check the basement and attic and then i'll lock myself in my room until morning with my pepper spray...

I'm semi-security conscious. I lock the car when I'm at work and it's in a public lot, but don't bother when I'm at home because it's behind a closed garage door. I lock the house doors before I go to bed, but usually leave my bedroom windows cracked.


I've never been mugged or burgled, but I have had my car stolen.

I've been burgled. All the doors were locked and the "big dog" slept through the whole thing. That incident made my husband extremely security conscious but didn't have quite the same impact on me for some reason. I've always been a car door locker but not much of a house door locker. I try to remember to lock the door when I'm home because my husband has gotten me into the habit and I always lock it when I leave. I NEVER even consider picking up hitch-hikers! Jeez Kevin! I thought the only people who hitch-hiked were serial killers. Do you mean to tell me that regular people still do that?

I'm so-so on the security conciousness but my husband is OCD about it. He checks the lock on the cars, doors, and window a minimum of three times before he goes to bed. If we leave a window open for fresh air he'll place random things in front of it, so it'll make a racket if someone tries to get in. I'm not sure why he's so obsessed, we have two large dogs that bark at every little noise, not even a mouse can fart without us knowing about it.

I was burgled in my sleep* in college. I woke up and my purse, which had been between me (on the couch) and the coffee table had been completely ransacked... all of the bills and change had been removed. I think I was covered up by the blankets and that the burglar didn't even know I was there. It was super weird.

I've picked up one hitchhiker in my life... it was a lady and she was wearing nurse's scrubs. She was bawling and she was on a residential street, so I pulled over and said, "If I let you in my car, are you going to kill me?" She laughed and said, "No", so I unlocked my doors and drove her to wherever it was she said she needed taken.

*I was passed out

I once picked up boat-hitchhikers. It was two girls, and they were wearing bikinis so there was no way they were hiding weapons. I was canoeing around on a lake, and they came out of the mouth of the river on inner tubes. The river was very lazy, and the trip had actually taken them three hours more than they had expected, so they were burned to a crisp and terrified their ride had abandoned them. They were also still three miles from their meet-up since they thought the river would let them out near the town beach, which it didn't. And this was pre-cell phone of course.
I paddled them across to where we were staying, then drove them into town. It didn't feel very risky.

Ok you know what? I picked up some kids at a campground who had lost their way and drove them back to their cabin. I also picked up a girl in my neighborhood who's dog had run away from her. When I hear "pick up a hitch-hiker" I picture someone on the side of the interstate with their thumb out. I've never picked up someone on the side of the interstate. In fact, when I see one I usually say "pfft! YEAH RIGHT!" out loud to myself.

boat-hitchhikers, I love it.

I am not so security conscious. My car was broken into at the repair shop and the stereo stolen (but the Van Halen cassette was taken out and thrown in the back) Locking the doors just made them break the window. Locking car doors around here in the winter can be tricky. Now that I have a reliable keyless lock I do lock my car so the XM radio won't get stolen.

We lock the front door when we go to sleep, but none of the other doors! RA, we only lock the house up if we're going to be away overnight.

I was robbed at gunpoint at a convenience store. They took my purse too, so I was afraid they'd go to my house, which was about a block from the store. A store owner with a gun put an end to their little spree - held them until the police came.

I love it when LG resurrects an old thread - I see the title in the "unread" column and think "OH! That's a brilliant topic." and it turns out it's been brilliant for some time.

That is all.

I was robbed at gunpoint at a convenience store. They took my purse too, so I was afraid they'd go to my house, which was about a block from the store. A store owner with a gun put an end to their little spree - held them until the police came.

OH SHIT!

I remember when the instructors on staff at the martial arts school where we taught were training to teach self-defense seminars. One of the most poignant demonstrations we had in class was a "walk" demonstration. Everyone had to take turns walking across the classroom like they normally would walk... no thought to it, just do it.

At the time I was still in college, so I was always rushing to class... and walked in a rush with my eyes to the ground. That's exactly how I walked across the classroom. I apparently would've been a mugger's dream. After our chief instructor let us walk across the room, he told us that a group of criminals were surveyed for how they would select their victims. More times than not, they said they were people watching to find potential crime victims - fast walking, clutching possessions close by, eyes down, eyes darting... The ones they avoided were the ones who walked with their eyes up, aware of their surroundings, walked at a slow, leisurely pace; the ones who make eye contact with people as they pass them, even if it was brief... i.e. they're totally paying attention to nonverbal cues.

Now when I go out in public or I'm out of town , I'm conscientious of my walk.