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Laikanist Times
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Dylan Orchard | 3 comments Laikanist Times

Links to all formats here: http://www.laikareb.com/dylanorchard/...

Laikanist Times is the story of one planet divided by a few million years and a fistful of species divides. While the Bald Chimps are seeing apparitions and finding God (or possibly Dog) the dogs are indulging in some quantum meddling and the humans? Well, they had their time.

Rex the Bulldog sets out to change the world, for better or worse, Gdunk the Chimp aims for the stars, Yessa aims to be left alone and Raeget and Kaisabosen aim for, well, something probably. All alongside a host of characters including the good, the bad and the ugly with Jinx and the Four-Leggers, the Laikanists, the Whippet Brotherhood and the Great Salmonists each doing their best to ignore what they need to and find what they want. And all the while Laika the Space Dog is doing something, or not, depending on your point of view.

Laikanist Times is a strange and surrealist parable on the wonders and woes of religion, science, belief and talking animals. As the first novella from Dylan Malik Orchard it’s less a declaration of intent and more a declaration of confusion. With the answers to none of your questions and a slew of doubts to introduce. Humour, farce, satire, sloths and Sci-Fi are mixed together in a heady literary brew*.

*’heady literary brew’ may or may not actually mean anything.

And why should you download it? Because your life is at least 0.00152% worse for not doing so – and that could make all the difference. You only regret the things you didn’t do as they say, and wouldn’t it be a kicker to look up from your death bed, a bright white light hovering before you and think ‘damn, too late to grab that novella now’? Of course that’s a pretty ridiculous saying, especially if the things you do include taking a load of crack and whoring yourself out to truckers while losing your job and family all to pay for more of that sweet sweet rock. But I can 99% guarantee that reading Laikanist Times won’t leave you toothless, emaciated and on your knees servicing Billy Bob on his run out of Podunk, Ohio for five bucks on a rainy night. Just don’t hold me accountable for that remaining 1%.


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