UK Amazon Kindle Forum discussion

I'm going to write a book about how to write a book about how to write a book about how to sell a book. Instant rices beckon!

My bowl of oatmeal waved at me this morning.

Patti (baconater) wrote: "My bowl of oatmeal waved at me this morning."

Did you wave back?

Microwave?

And a mexican wave from those refried beans?

I bet the staff room will be fragrant on Monday.

Patti (baconater) wrote: "I bet the staff room will be fragrant on Monday."

is that a complex literary allusion that has passed me by entirely or a hint to fellow staff members that the windows should be kept open.

Gingerlily - Mistress Lantern wrote: "I'm going to write a book about how to write a book about how to write a book about how to sell a book. Instant rices beckon!"

given the naturally insecure nature of indie authors they'd probably buy it in droves :-)

Jim wrote: "Patti (baconater) wrote: "I bet the staff room will be fragrant on Monday."

is that a complex literary allusion that has passed me by entirely or a hint to fellow staff members that the windows sh..."

We're doing a Mexican brunch at our's on Sunday. There will be beans.

I trust that the windows do open?

They do. The question is will they.

depends on the air pressure inside doesn't it

Jim wrote: "depends on the air pressure inside doesn't it"

I have visions of Star Trek - She's gonna blow!

Sorry I provided recipe.

further thoughts on novelists

https://tallissteelyard.wordpress.com...

and on what sells

https://tallissteelyard.wordpress.com...

Ooop, you have a typo. Unless you intended to write this...

“You need disciple to write these Tallis.”

Jim? Typo?

Never he did!

He created a new word and it'll be in next edition of the OED!

Disciple is an existing word. It just means something quite different from discipline.

Gingerlily - Mistress Lantern wrote: "Disciple is an existing word. It just means something quite different from discipline."

I felt that it was unfair to the OED so I've nipped in and changed it

Jim wrote: "Gingerlily - Mistress Lantern wrote: "Disciple is an existing word. It just means something quite different from discipline."

I felt that it was unfair to the OED so I've nipped in and changed it"

Perhaps Tallis does need a disciple, though.

You need to be careful about disciples. You start with one, then you end up with 12 and have to feed the lot of them!

I've always shunned the idea of having disciples and would caution Tallis against them as well.
Mind you I suspect he's far more used than I am to the respect and adulation of free spending patrons

He would probably end up with a bunch of Mutts!

absolutely
I'm pondering Mutt's view on book promotion as I write

Jim wrote: "absolutely
I'm pondering Mutt's view on book promotion as I write"

That should be interesting!!

Jim wrote: "I've always shunned the idea of having disciples and would caution Tallis against them as well.
Mind you I suspect he's far more used than I am to the respect and adulation of free spending patrons"

Disciples are okay, except there always seems to be one bad apple.

Gingerlily - Mistress Lantern wrote: "Jim wrote: "absolutely
I'm pondering Mutt's view on book promotion as I write"

That should be interesting!!"

in the Chinese sense of 'interesting times'?

David wrote: "Disciples are okay, except there always seems to be one bad apple.."

put it like this, one rotten one in a pack of twelve and you'd feel you'd been cheated

Jim wrote: "David wrote: "Disciples are okay, except there always seems to be one bad apple.."

put it like this, one rotten one in a pack of twelve and you'd feel you'd been cheated"

As I like to say when I find one cracked egg in the dozen, "Judas Priest!"

You may or may not have seen this one


MEMO
TO: JESUS, SON OF JOSEPH, WOODCRAFTER CARPENTER SHOP, NAZARETH
FROM: JORDAN MANAGEMENT CONSULTANTS, JERUSALEM
Dear Sir:

Thank you for submitting the resumes of the 12 men you have picked for management positions in your new organization. All of them have now taken our battery of tests; we have not only run the results through our computer, but also arranged personal interviews for each of them with our psychologist and vocational aptitude consultant.

It is the staff opinion that most of your nominees are lacking in background, education, and vocational aptitude for the type of enterprise you are undertaking. They do not have the team concept. We would recommend that you continue your search for persons of experience in managerial ability and proven capability.

Simon Peter is emotionally unstable and given to fits of temper. Andrew has absolutely no qualities of leadership. The two brothers, James and John, the sons of Zebedee, place personal interest above company loyalty. Thomas demonstrates a questioning attitude that would tend to undermine morale.

We feel that it is our duty to tell you that Matthew has been blacklisted by the Greater Jerusalem Better Business Bureau. James, the son of Alphaeus, and Thaddaeus definitely have radical leanings, and they both registered a high score on the manic depressive scale.

One of the candidates, however, shows great potential. He is a man of ability and resourcefulness, meets people well, has a keen business mind and has contacts in high places. He is highly motivated, ambitious, and responsible. We recommend Judas Iscariot as your controller and right-hand man. All of the other profiles are self-explanatory.

We wish you every success in your new venture.

Sincerely yours,
Jordan Management Consultants

Jim wrote: "You may or may not have seen this one


MEMO
TO: JESUS, SON OF JOSEPH, WOODCRAFTER CARPENTER SHOP, NAZARETH
FROM: JORDAN MANAGEMENT CONSULTANTS, JERUSALEM
Dear Sir:

Thank you for submitting the re..."

lol

Oh, and while I'm at it, A Bad Penny is now available for purchase

https://tallissteelyard.wordpress.com...

And another blog, another patron, another lady for Tallis

https://tallissteelyard.wordpress.com...

Not for very long though...

Some people you forget even after working with them for months, others stay with you for ever after but one short conversation.

That is true. And some linger like a bad smell...

true enough, everybody cheers us up, some when they arrive and some when they leave

We had one guy at work who was idealogically opposed to using deodrant, and he literally lingered for a while after he left the room. I can only assume his wife had no sense of smell.

Sense of smell does seem to vary a lot, it's not uncommon for me to have a woman walk past me and I can still smell her perfume forty yards up the street.
Mind you she does seem to have applied it with a very generous hand.
It's not unpleasant (but then it's the street not an enclosed space) but I can only assume that our sense of smell differs

Is that one specific woman? Who just loves her perfume!

Gingerlily - Mistress Lantern wrote: "We had one guy at work who was idealogically opposed to using deodrant, and he literally lingered for a while after he left the room. I can only assume his wife had no sense of smell."

I read somewhere that Steve Jobs went through an anti-deodorant phase.

Gingerlily - Mistress Lantern wrote: "Is that one specific woman? Who just loves her perfume!"

if it is I can only say that she gets about a lot!

Advice on dress?

https://tallissteelyard.wordpress.com...

If Mutt fell into a manure pile he would come out with a golden egg!

Gingerlily - Mistress Lantern wrote: "If Mutt fell into a manure pile he would come out with a golden egg!"

these things have to be planned properly :-)

And who better than Mutt to do that planning.

a chapter of incidents, purely random chance, who could expect a ten year old to organise that

Those who know Mutt?

Gingerlily - Mistress Lantern wrote: "Those who know Mutt?"

Sadly true, I'm sure he's both hurt at the level of unjustified suspicion and gratified that enough people grasped the truth to ensure they are unlikely to cross him in the future