Inkshares Community discussion

Greetings, fellows,

I have recently finished what I am (tentatively) calling my first draft of Part 1 for my project, Proxy. This will be a standalone with many "parts" that reveal the story through the perspectives of the different characters. With Part One, I am mostly looking for cohesion between the two perspectives, and that the outcome of Part 1 does not seem rushed or forced.

This is a 1st draft, and I know it will have plenty of errors I have not caught (despite several re-reads). My biggest concern is that it makes sense to readers. Anyone willing to take the time to read and give any impressions, I will not only be grateful, but I offer any services in trading critique time for time, helping with blurbs, dialogue, or character development, as I feel these are my strengths in writing. Or, if none of that appeals, just let me know your terms-- I am flexible. ;)

Proxy- Part 1 (Chapters 1-12) Available Here On Wattpad

I realized in my haste to get this posted I neglected to provide a synopsis. Wow, that was dumb. No wonder I have had no interest.

"Every god was a superhuman who evolved abilities to live symbiotically with the energy feeding parasitic entity hosted by the human race; the soul. These Preternaturals guided human development until the fall of Rome and the rise of a rival, the Vapids; those who evolved without any soul, and who begin exterminating the Preternaturals, forcing them into extinction or hiding. Two millennia later, a Preternatural named Max Lucas crosses paths with her first Vapid, and finally discovers why she has been alone, and ignorant of her ancestry for her entire life.

Those Preternaturals who remain, hiding in plain sight, along with the oldest of their kind, known as the Primes, or the Relics to which they are mockingly referred to by the Vapids, give Max sanctuary after her encounter, and the horrific event that follows as a result. As she learns about her ancestry, her abilities, and the veil of history is lifted from over her eyes, Max also learns about the Vapid who threatens the Preternaturals, Silas Dethridge, and his crusade to end their influence, and their existence."