Support for Indie Authors discussion

Hi Alex, suggested tittle Written in Blood

Blurb is a good start, needs tightening as you suggest. I can't suggest edits as I'm on my iPad and keep losing text, it's too hard! All the best.

I'm not the world's best at blurbs, but I do have a bit of an idea.

TITLE: Lock up your daughters

BLURB: Suddenly, Oakhurst isn't such a nice place to live any more. A serial killer is targeting young girls, and Sergeant Mitchell and Constable Turner find themselves in a race against time to unmask the perpetrator.

Suspicion falls on Zack Wild, a writer with a history of violence. But is this just a smoke screen?

One thing that would help in writing a better blurb is to know what is different about your book vs. any other book about a serial killer. There's not much to work with in the blurb provided. Shortening it is easy, but it still reads like the blurb to any other serial killer story.

Rachel wrote: "Hi Alex, suggested tittle Written in Blood "

Great title idea!

Helloooo, Alex!

*waves happily*

Hmm. I kinda agree with everyone else about needing something that sets you apart. With that said, this is totally outta my realm so it gets bonus "interesting" points haha! Anyhoo, here's my take:


Oakhurst has always been is a peaceful place to live, a veritable sleepy little village... but all that is about to change.

When Until a young girl goes missing and another is discovered, murdered. the village finds itself in the grip of a serial killer who is targeting its daughters. With no detective in the village, it falls to Sergeant Mitchell and Constable Turner to investigate and catch the killer.

The only suspect?

Suspicion quickly falls on Zack Wild, the village's newest resident and a writer an author with a history of violence, who specialises in writes of nothing but grisly murders, both real and fictional. He maintains his innocence, but the coincidences keep mounting, and he has a history of violence.

But is everything as it seems?


Ehhh, that's kinda crappy but I can't think right now hahaha!! Bestest of luck!!!

Hugs,
Ann

Written in Blood is a great title, especially with the reincorporation of the word carving. And there, also, might be your "something special." How do those words relate to Zack/the killer? Why does the killer write on the bodies, and what is that significance? Consider those questions, and see if you can produce a sentence that represents that aspect of the book (without spoiling anything!). Adding a few words concerning this will risk running the blurb a little longer than the snappy one Ann suggested, but would help to advertise what is unique about the killer, and therefore your story. Just an idea!

Definitely reincorporate the words carved in the skin. It may be brutal but it's also unique and interesting enough to catch the imagination.

I read your "interesting" tidbits. Here's what grabbed me:

~ killer carving words into their bodies
~ also attractive and can be charming

Keep in mind I dig romance/erotica and have the attention span of a dead gnat so yeeeahhh...

*wry grin*

Okay, I totally can't resist haha!


Oakhurst has always been a peaceful little village until a young girl goes missing and another is murdered. And then another...

The only suspect? An author with a history of violence who writes of nothing but grisly murders. The only clue? [Jagged/Meticulous/Whatever] words carved into the victims' bodies.

Has Zack Wild found a new canvas in human flesh? Or is everything not as it appears?


Okay, I'm stopping now. I swear!! XD

Many hugs,
Ann

My turn! How about something like this:

In the small, close-knit village of Oakhurst, residents aren't willing to believe that one of their own might be a brutal murderer.

So when young women begin to die - their bodies found with angry words carved onto their skin - suspicion falls on the newcomer to the village. Charming Zack Wild, author of violent crime novels and possessor of a dark history, seems like a perfect suspect.

As they investigate, Seargent Mitchell and Constable Turner are increasingly unwilling to believe that someone they know could be responsible for such heinous crimes. But will this affect their judgement, allowing the real killer to escape?

I think I like Annie's version so far, but I'd make a few small changes to the first paragraph. Does the name of the village really need to be included in the blurb? Here's how I'd do it:

It was always a peaceful little village...until a young girl goes missing and another is murdered. Then another...

I'm actually not great at blurbs myself, but here's my contribution!

An idyllic town in the English countryside is disturbed by a series of grisly crimes, as young women are murdered and their bodies marred by accusative words carved into them. The police refuse to believe that one of the villagers could be the killer, and so turn their attention to the newest resident, the charming author, Zack Wild.
Zack claims to be innocent, but the violent nature of his novels, and the dark past he is trying to escape, suggest otherwise. As the killer becomes bolder, Zack must fight to convince the vigilante villagers of the impossible: that he is innocent, and that the unhinged maniac has been living among them all along.

Hope that helps!

Let us know what you end up with, now that we're all invested!

Lol, no problem! I'm just glad I was helpful. :) (And aren't mum's great like that? ;) )

If you don't like angry, I thought Isaac's 'accusatory' worked quite well. Or 'condemning' maybe?

If you want to go in a different direction, maybe 'vile words' is a good one.

Looks good, Alex! (And it looks like your current book cover uses the same font I have on my books! :D)

If you're curious, the font is called '28 Days Later'. I think it was used on the poster for the film.

And I agree. I don't do my own covers, either.