Polls for Our Souls discussion

State your opinion on the question

I don’t think so. I think you’re completely entitled to who you want to see on your feed

I dont think it’s right unless you have too many friends or its a spam account.

Well, I'd feel bad about it, but that's the point of a request: consent to be friends. So if someone is a friend collector, inactive, or has nothing in common with you, along with other reasons you might have, it's your choice. I don't think they get notified that you ignored their friend request.

Lilia wrote: "I don’t think so. I think you’re completely entitled to who you want to see on your feed"

You can be friends with someone but unfollow them so you wont see what they post

@Kaylee Ah okay

I do like to follow people with similar reading tastes

Lilia wrote: "I do like to follow people with similar reading tastes"

Same but I just unfollow them if they dont have similar books.

No. I have a question like "did you read my profile about being active and what's your favorite book/series" and if neither isn't answered then I ignore it. or I'll look at their profile, books, read the profile and think yes or no. but there's some I've rejected.

No, I've rejected some, mostly because there reasoning for sending it were bad. Seeing as my question is: 'Why do you want to be my friend' if the answer is strange or I find it weird in some way, then I wont add them. But if they leave it blank I'll look at their profile then think yes or no.

i add anyone that requests me but if they're always posting stuff i dont agree with then i unfriend them later. and i get why people have those questions they want you to answer but also i never request to be friends with them bc i hate being put on the spot like that lol

I don't have a question but I profile check and mostly I get people who genuinely want to be my friend and read pretty similar tastes (compare books button) and are active so I rarely, if ever, reject requests. But maybe I'm just lucky in the type of people who send me friend requests.

I used to accept all of the friend requests I've received, but lately I've been pickier and have been rejecting people if they don't answer my question, give me a super weird answer, or have nothing on their profiles.

No, I don't think it's rude. Different people have different wants and tastes on this site. I rarely reject a friend request personally. I have broad tastes so I have something in common book wise with almost everyone and i'm always open to broadening my horizons.

Though I got a request recently from someone who had nothing at all on their profile so I rejected that one. It didn't seem right...I do look at profiles first and if someone seems like a douche then i'll reject it but 99.9% of the time I guess i'm lucky with friend requests, so it's rare i'll reject one. :)

I accept everyone and then delete it if it's an author promoting their book. Very rarely if someone annoys me too much I untop friend them so I see their posts less often (only see their posts if another friend likes it)

I deleted 2 booktubers because I read some shitty books because of them. That's like the most petty thing to do ever, but they aren't active on goodreads anyway so they suck.

It is your right to accept or deny anyone access to you/your account. Just because they follow you doesn't mean you have to be their "friend." It's a different degree of relationship. I usually check to see how many books we have in common, and I also might look at things like reading preferences, age, hobbies, etc., to see if I think we will be compatible Goodreads friends for each other.

Angela wrote: "State your opinion on the question"

I'll accept most friend requests, especially if the person in question has either a) Similar tastes in books or b) Thought-provoking reviews or funny updates. I don't like inactive friends. My pet peeve is people who friend thousands of people only to get likes and never gives likes or comments back. I remove those people pretty soon after accepting a request.

I don't think it rude to not accept all friend requests I get. It is your own choice.
I accept most requests if they answer my question (last book finished) in a way that makes sense and if there are common reading or other interests I can gather from their profile. Also, I always accept requests from those I've "met" on group discussions etc. on here already.
But I have declined and would do so again when the person expresses views on their profile which make me feel uneasy - like things that show intolerance to other opinions or lifestyle choices but their own.
I state that on my profile, though, so anyone sending me a request knows this beforehand.

Similarly like other people I used to accept them all, but I decided lately to be more picky. I mean you can follow people and eventually friendrequest them if it feels natural.
I mean on facebook or in real life if I meet people with slightly similar book taste I jump at the chance to get their contact info. But on goodreads its not that hard to find people with similar book taste so I dont add ALL of them, I fr them if a) we have friends in common b) LOTS OF books in common c) we have some but have a good connection through those.
I dont feel guilty rejecting those I do reject.

I usually accept people that have a pretty filled out profile. If they look like all they do is friend collect, then it's a no go for me.
I also try to accept people my own age. I read books that aren't always appropriate for younger audiences and my reviews can reflect that.

I don't think it's rude, you have a right to friend who you want. But I think, as most people have been saying, that you should take into account various factors when deciding who you want to be friends with. Like if the person has a starfish as a profile pic and you don't like starfish or whatever.
I think accepting and rejecting friend requests here, while it's an online platform, is the same as making friends anywhere else. If something about that person makes you feel uncomfortable or upset, then distance yourself from them and find other people with whom you can share great book recommendations! :)

Angela wrote: "State your opinion on the question"

No, if:

it’s from someone I’ve never heard of and their profile shows they’ve read like one book (which I’ve actually seen) so you know it’s spam,

Their book list is totally incompatible with mine, so why am I getting a request from them, oh wait, it’s because they have a book coming out but it sounds lame,

Or (and this one hurts) it’s from someone I like and admire, but suddenly my feed is inundated with so many posts and reviews that it takes all day to scroll thru and find my other friends’ posts. In that case, I reluctantly unfollow them.

Bottom line, if accepting the request, or following is going to be a waste of your time or interests, you’re not being rude, and in fact may be doing both parties a favor in the long run. Life is too short as it is.

I don't think it's rude if it looks like a spam account or something along those lines or you just genuinely don't think you have anything in common and would be very good friends

It is not rude to reject a friend request if the person is someone you do not know, someone with whom you have nothing in common, or especially if it is someone who expresses opinions that you find offensive. The wonderful thing about Goodreads is that there is more than one way to use it. There is not just one "right" way. Some users prefer to have a lot of friends, and some prefer to keep their friend list a bit smaller.

I also don't think it's rude if you have a reason, for example if you have nothing in common. I still feel bad when I reject a friend request though :S

Not if you reject it for the right reason.... but I honestly would feel a little bad about it.

I don't think its rude at all. If you feel something isn't right about the person, rejecting is fine.

i don't think it's rude at all. You can't be friends with everyone and you aren't required to. I decline and/or ignore friend requests all the time: If they don't answer my question or they look like a friend gatherer. OR they are an author who tries to friend me because I added their book to my TBR. Or if they are looking for reviews.

Look, your GR friend list informs your entire GR experience. You get their updates, you see their reviews first, you get emails, etc about them.

Why invite someone who you aren't interested in into your life?

ETA: I never feel bad about turning down requests.

I don’t think it’s rude. If u have nothing in common with someone u don’t want to see their posts and that’s ok.

I always accept as i love having a variety of different people on my feed, i get to see a much wider range of different books this way. That being said, feel free to send a friend request.

I rarely reject a friend request, because who couldn’t use more friends:-) Feel free to add me!! I’m pretty active on Goodreads...

BUT I don’t think its rude if people choose to reject friend requests. I assume people have there reasons.

Whenever I get a friend request I always send a greeting message to the person to engage them. I don't usually accept requests where the sender doesn't accept messages.

I feel the whole purpose of being friends is to share our mutual love of books. You can't share if you can't communicate.

However, I do reconsider this for people who are extremely popular on GR...so, I get it..they don't want a hundred people sending them messages all the time. Still so, I may accept or not depending on our compatibility.

I don't feel guilty not accepting. I try to avoid friend collectors at ALL costs 😊

I personally don’t ignore any friends requests on GR because I think that the people here are different from those on social media. When someone sends me a friend request they just want to see the books that I read the reviews that I write. But I also believe that people have the right to ignore. So no, it’s not rude..

I don't think it's rude, either. Especially in this age of internet scamming, I don't hesitate to reject requests of people with sketchy profiles or who don't know me but include an overly affectionate message. Or if they're obviously selling something. I just rejected a request today from someone who wanted to sell me waist-training bustiers!!!

depends on who it is whether or not u know them and if u h8 them

Errin wrote: "I don't think it's rude, either. Especially in this age of internet scamming, I don't hesitate to reject requests of people with sketchy profiles or who don't know me but include an overly affectio..."

I rejected a request today from someone wanting to sell me leather watch straps. I don't wear a watch anymore...also not the point of Goodreads.

So yeah I don't think it's rude. I normally accept friend requests and I do love to broaden my book horizons, but if it looks sketchy or someone is trying to sell me something...uh...no thanks.

I don't usually reject friend requests unless the person doesn't answer the question I have, which asks for a favorite or highly recommended author. Like some people have already said, if the person seems sketchy or creepy or tries to ask me for something or sell me something, then I'll also reject those friend requests. So, no, I don't think it's rude.

I don't think it's a bad thing. I mean, it's a friend request, so you are entitled to just ignore it and decline. If you want to be friends, cool, but if you don't want to see them on your feed or if you guys aren't ever going to talk and/or interact with each other, then I don't think there's any problem in declining them.

Idk. Like me, I feel like I'm way too nice. I did decline one. And I felt really bad. But I did it because they didn't really have any books in common with me.

I don't think it's bad at all. I've had too many people send friend requests and they don't even have any books listed! They just friend 100 people -- that's creepy to me. That's why I like for people to send a message as to why they want to be my "friend" :)

I reject most friend requests primarily because I have very limited computer use and want folks that have similar (or compatible) interests - not necessarily the same books. I spend enough time on Goodreads as it is. :) Want to spend more time reading!

Not at all. This is YOUR space, and you're the only one who gets to decide who to be friends with. Exactly like real life - you don't have to befriend every person you meet.

Like, when I first started GR, I would accept everyone. Then I started realizing that I have a ton of "friends" I never talk to, so I started comparing my books to theirs to see if there's even something to talk about there before accepting anything, because otherwise what's the point?

Nowadays I have a friend question, and anyone who doesn't answer it gets rejects. Like, if you can't even be bothered to write two words so I'd know you actually want to talk to me, I'm not really interested...

honestly its your choice

i’ve only rejected friend requests because the person has very different book tastes compared to mine

I accept everyone because although a person doesn’t have the same books as me, perhaps they like a review of mine and wanted to follow what I read. Maybe they’re following you because they like your Library, I mean why else be friends on Goodreads since we can’t randomly post.

I used to accept all friend requests even if we don't have the same tastes, but one day I got a message from one of the friends (who by the way sent me a request) telling me exactly " please get me out of your list I don't like your book choices and I don't know how to unfriend you". So unless we have at least 50% similar tastes, it's a no.

Definitely not. It's like declining a phone call, sure you feel obligated to pick up but you don't have to if you don't want to.

I don't think it's rude. If we have almost no books in common or if the person has like almost no books on their shelf I usually do not add them.

I think it's just up to you. I don't see it as rude. Personally, I feel weird rejecting them, but I will if I don't really see the person and I ever going to interact--like if our reading tastes don't align at all.