Play Book Tag discussion

Oh boy...I can understand the thinking of spending time on electronic devices as being seen as a waste of time. I mean the studies are clearly showing we spend way too much time on electronic devices as well as children. Working in a school I can see the effects of way too much time on electronics. And then we give them Ipads to work one. A totally different subject.:) But books? To me, books are learning. And they do not have to be non-fiction to learn. My kids are the good readers that they are because they read so much when they were younger. Think of the increased vocabulary, letting the mind delve into whatever genre and how that stimulates the brain. I could go on and on and on. But I won't.:)

Quote from my mother.... You could get so much more done if you weren’t writing reviews! My mother is a book reader and she doesn’t see reading as a waste of time. But somehow the small amount of time devoted to wring reviews, well that is questionable to her. But as with your description of your mother, many things are.

What i do consider a time waster, but can’t seem to manage, is the social media piece. If I didn’t spend do much time in Goodreads or Facebook, I’d have so much more time to actually read! These days, Correspondence can take a long time. Sometimes close to an hour to go through emails, texts, and varying social media and respond. Is it a time waster - yes. But it’s a new part of existence and as they say, that train has left the station.

My advice to you AJ personally, is that one is only wasting time when they are bored, disengaged, or negative, or toxic. If you are connected to yourself and to others, your interests, passions, and engagement with anything, you will never be wasting time. Love, connection, curiosity, pleasure, be it mind, body, heart.... I believe this is what life is about, even what God wants for us. You don’t have to feed that explanation to your mother, but negativity and judgement is a waste of time. Love, growth, connection, engagement - all that matters in this world. Truly live young friend - and read all you want as you do.

Oh wow, this is a topic that really gets me riled up. I had a similar conversation with a coworker who posited that if you really want to move up in your career or are a serious professional you shouldn't waste your time on fiction and should focus on self-improvement, non-fiction reads. I vehemently disagree.

It is only a waste of time if you don't feel it adds value to your life or you don't get anything out of it. Only you can decide. Reading as a waste of time? Reading fiction as a waste of time!? Nonsense. I feel like I get so much out of reading fiction because I can experience life from another point of view, or simply get lost in another world.

This is an argument akin to "waste of money." It is no one's business how another person spends their money. Everyone is spending money (and time) on something and only they can decide if what they expend time or money on adds value to their life.

For me personally, I know I am not getting much value out of scrolling through Instagram and Twitter (Goodreads has much value for me 😈), but I still keep going back. My husband is on his phone a lot, but he is reading news, staying informed, so it is valuable for him. I see other people on their phones constantly, even out to dinner with friends, but if they are not with me it is none of my business and I don't care.

I wonder if sometimes people feel that fiction isn't as good as non-fiction because they think that fiction authors just write random stuff that isn't necessarily true whereas non-fiction is researched and somehow factual? I think good authors put quite a lot of effort into checking their work and so you can learn from them even if it's only better spelling. More importantly I think fiction can broaden your horizons at least as much as non-fiction if not more, in my case. For example, my new hobby of photography is directly a result of a Nora Roberts novel!

This is an awesome conversation topic.

Surprisingly, I can see where people come from on reading being a waste of time. I don't agree totally, but I understand.

This also leads to a conversation of addiction. You can be addicted to anything. It becomes an addiction when it starts to ruin relationships and interferes with your normal everyday life and responsibilities. This is a possibility with reading or the story or just using these as escaping.

My wife is not a reader and views reading as a waste of time. We have fought over this point for years but now, after 11 years, we understand and respect each other. She is one that rarely sits down at all. Her exact phrase before was, "reading is not experiencing anything. Why not go experience something." My response, "I will never experience WWII so leave me be."

But I have come to understand that reading can be a waste of time when other things are not being looked after. If the house is a mess and the kids are fighting, and we have dinner plans, its almost time to go, and I'm not dressed and my nose is in a book, well that is a waste (or poor management) of my time. Reminds me of "All things are lawful, but not all things are advantageous." Reversely, She understands my love for books and reading is relaxation for me.

I recently learned that my grandfather did not like my grandmother to read. She was a huge Isaac Asimov fan. I asked why she stopped reading. She said she would get so engrossed in a book, that she would spend all day reading and when my grandfather came home, the house would not be cleaned and supper would not be fixed and he would be upset. I hate a balance could not be reached and she practically gave up reading altogether.

So can reading be a waste of time. Yes if not managed properly within your life. Is just the act of reading a waste of time......not only no, but **ll NO! Reading allows you to experience time, places, cultures, professions, and life experiences that are otherwise impossible It helps to create empathy and sympathy. Books are a relaxation, an education, a philosophication (it is a word, I looked it up, just rarely used). Books are friends, and enemies, and neighbors, and good and evil and everything in between. Books are life transcribed.

Sorry for the length!

Love that Jason!

Hi AJ - I've often wondered about this one. I just wrote a review of Reasons to Stay Alive, and one of the things I liked about that book was that his list of things that help him navigate dark patches and difficult days includes things like 80s movies and good books - if these things genuinely feel like a comfort and a support, then I think they probably are! (Social media and compulsive web browsing, on the other hand, are time thieves, in my life at least...)
I have also just started reading Wired for Story, which bases its advice for writers on the idea that our brains have evolved to use storytelling as a way to communicate and learn - so although I'm a huge non-fiction fan, I don't agree with your mother that it's more worthwhile. (To continue with my previous example: I think the message that Matt Haig is trying to convey about the value of human life in Reasons to Stay Alive comes through just as effectively in his earlier novel The Humans.)
A side note on Goodreads reviews - my husband agrees with Amy's mother that I'd be far more productive if I didn't write them, but for me they're a way to make sure that my reading *isn't* a waste of time - I feel that even if nobody reads a review, the fact I wrote it meant that I actively engaged with the book and tried to form my own ideas about it, and makes the act of reading feel less like passive consumption.

Meli wrote: "Reading fiction as a waste of time!? Nonsense. I feel like I get so much out of reading fiction because I can experience life from another point of view, or simply get lost in another world. ."

This. 100%. I think reading fiction (for the most part) makes me a more sympathetic and understanding person. I cannot literally walk a mile in everyone's shoes, but I can read a book that shows their viewpoint and provides insight to something I have never experienced.

Jason wrote: "But I have come to understand that reading can be a waste of time when other things are not being looked after. If the house is a mess and the kids are fighting, and we have dinner plans, its almost time to go, and I'm not dressed and my nose is in a book, well that is a waste (or poor management) of my time."

I totally agree with this. Reading is not a waste of time, but it has to be balanced with other things in your life. Just like I don't think going to the gym is a waste of time, but if I choose to go to the gym at a time that makes me miss/late for a study group or work function, then I have picked an unwise time to do this activity. Doesn't make the underlying activity invalid, just speaks to time management or prioritization.

I will say that sometimes I think reading is a waste of my time.

Let me rephrase that.

Sometimes I waste time with a mindless task and I choose to fill that wasted time with trashy romance novels that do not provide much in terms of personal growth. Though my vocabulary has been enriched! lol.

But I still don't think that reading is the root of that problem. It is a given that I am going to "waste time" at certain points in my life—and I would even argue that it is not a waste of time but, instead, essential down/relaxation time following particularly intense times in my work/life/school—and I choose to fill that time with reading trashy books.

And, I feel better about reading during that time than binge watching mindless TV (which I also sometimes do) or playing endless hours of Candy Crush (which I also sometimes do. Often while watching trashy TV because even in my "wasting time" mode I like to multi-task).

And, sometimes, my "wasting time" activity is deep cleaning my house (while listening to an audiobook) because few things make me as happy as a sparkling home that smells like lemon Pledge. Even though it is probably viewed as more productive than reading, it is still not the best use of my time.

Bottom line: AJ, you do you girl. Especially at this time when you are hurting and you need time to mentally and emotionally heal from the breakup with your fiancé.

I was lucky- my parents limited TV time, and either sent us outside to play or work-I grew up on a farm, so chores were never ending- or told us to read a book.

My husband’s not a reader, but he has to have the TV on during all waking hours. He thinks reading is a waste of time, and I think a lot of TV is. So I’ve learned to read while men hunt alligators, or treasure hunters dig through storage lockers, or news pundits squawk about the latest tweet. And he’s slowly learning that I don’t appreciate interruptions when there’s a few pages left.

As long as I’m enjoying what I’m reading, it’s not a waste of time. It’s when I look up from a book and think, well, there’s ___hours I’ll never get back, that reading is a time suck. Which is why I am ok with DNFing a book I don’t like.
I still have to have all my work done before I sit down, though. Enter the audiobook..

Tracy wrote: "My husband’s not a reader, but he has to have the TV on during all waking hours. He thinks reading is a waste of time, and I think a lot of TV is."

I absolutely love my father, but he also has the TV on all of the time. It is usually on news or sports or hunting shows, but he actually rarely is sitting there watching it! I think he just likes the background noise?

Regardless, it drives. me. insane. I absolutely never just sit down and turn on TV to see what's on. If I sit down to watch TV, it is to purposefully watch something that I want to watch and then I turn the TV off afterwards.

Like you, my mom just sits in her chair and reads right through the noise, but, honestly, it would maybe be a relationship deal-breaker for me! lol

Oh! Know what I do consider a personal HUGE waste of time? YouTube videos. I can fall into an endless black abyss of watching YouTube clips (often of late night/daytime talk shows that either are doing monologues or interviewing celebrities) and literally an hour will pass before I know it.

Aside from perhaps getting some news snipits out of it, I find it to be a complete waste of my time. But I cannot make myself stop!

I know it is going to be a bad time waster when I land on Graham Norton or Trevor Noah or SNL openers/weekend update. I love those clips and will just watch and watch and watch. Throw in long-form John Oliver and some Seth Meyers and I can just consider 2 hours down the drain! lol

AJ wrote: "I like the comparison of wasting your time is similar to wasting your money. My mom thinks I waste my money too lol"

I definitely could be a better budgeter! I say every year I am going to get better at saving but I cannot resist a fun dinner out with friends or a cheap plane ticket for a weekend away.

Ugh, all this thread is doing it highlighting things in my life that I should be doing better! lol

I really appreciated what Nikki said about writing the reviews and sharing them makes the book experience more meaningful. It’s the antidote to feeling reading was a waste of time. Plus we save each other from the bad ones, the true time wasters. And I do think the point about making sure you balance your life with other things is really important. Many of us have had the conversations about our partners or other family members not being readers. And so I think good reads fulfills something for each of us, to connect in this important experiential way. And of course I agree with Nicole, that reading this and just make us more intelligent are more aware or to learn more about other people’s experiences and cultures, it really does make us more compassionate. It really does drive to the center of the human experience. What could be more important than that?

I also think writing reviews here helps me solidify my thoughts or sometimes even change the way I view a book. And I love the interaction with other readers or getting the word out about a book. Sure, this isn't "real life," but we are building relationships with each other in a way.

... you know what is NOT a waste of time?
Checking the Goodreads PBT group every hour to see if March "trim the tbr" was announced 🤣 SO EXCITED! Can't wait to find out what the number is this month.

I agree with Jason, that if it interferes, not so much a waste of time, but mis-management of it. I believe A child copies our actions(Rachel's comment) and my daughter also learned to love books and reading ans now has books lining her bedroom walls. I also think we can learn a lot from Fiction books, not just non-fiction. Escaping into a good book, in my opinion, can be a great way to relax from the pressures of life.

Meli wrote: "... you know what is NOT a waste of time?
Checking the Goodreads PBT group every hour to see if March "trim the tbr" was announced 🤣 SO EXCITED! Can't wait to find out what the number is this month."

Hahaha! I will save you some time and let you know that I do not announce Trim or Horizons until after Anita announces the monthly tag. Which, I believe she is doing tomorrow afternoon! ;)

Nicole R wrote: "Meli wrote: "... you know what is NOT a waste of time?
Checking the Goodreads PBT group every hour to see if March "trim the tbr" was announced 🤣 SO EXCITED! Can't wait to find out what the number..."

OK, thanks for the heads up!
I was worried I wouldn't like a randomizer picking my next read but this has been the most suspenseful, fun experiment so far.

Joanne wrote: "I agree with Jason, that if it interferes, not so much a waste of time, but mis-management of it. I believe A child copies our actions(Rachel's comment) and my daughter also learned to love books a..."

I agree with both you and Jason on that point.
But the idea that there are not stinkers in the non-fiction category is kinda ridiculous. Not all non-fiction is eye-opening or value-added, nor will any and all non-fiction help you grow as a person or improve.

OMG, reading fiction is so not a waste of time.

In fact, I think there's a great case to be made that it is less of a waste of time than non-fiction. A lot of non-fiction is a snapshot in time i.e. politics, science, nutrition, the latest trends, etc. and next year it won't matter a whit whether you knew about what you read because it will be old news, or defunct, or the wisdom will have shifted. Personally, I think all reading is better than no reading, but FICTION, fiction is all about the human condition. It goes to the core of who we are and how to be empathetic and understand the trials of others.

Personally, I don't view entertainments as a waste of time as a general rule - - only for me specifically. For example, I never like movies, so for me, each and every time I try a movie is a waste of time. Because I don't end up liking it. But if you love movies than it isn't a waste of time. Some people would argue cooking is a waste of time - - you cook for an hour and people eat your cooking in 10 minutes. But I happen to find that a satisfying activity. I also love baseball - - every game is arguably 3 hours of wasted time, but I absolutely love it, so for me, I think it is worthwhile.

I think if it makes you happy and isn't stopping you from reaching other goals that are important to you - - then it's not a waste of time!

That concept of 'wastes time' -- it absolutely turns on the slow burn in me! What exactly is a 'waste of time'? Isn't a 'waste of time' at its core, just what someone else doesn't want to spend his/her time doing? Isn't it therefore merely 'judgment of others'?
Now, as Tracy said, do you, the person reading or watching tv or listening to music or playing video games, feel when you stop that you just lost X hours that you will never get back? If the answer is 'no', then it is absolutely not a 'waste of time'.

First - I agree with pretty much everything everyone here is posted. Jason's comments in particular about it being about 'mismanagement' rather than 'waste' are pretty accurate. It's about how you use your time and how you manage your obligations with leisure, etc.

It is also about how you feel about what you are spending your time on, not how others feel about it. For me for example, the time people spend gardening is something I personally think is ridiculous - but I dislike 'grubbing in the dirt' (too much time having the gardening and lawn mowing as my responsibility growing up on the farm - that took me away from reading!). So I have no right to say (and don't) that YY is wasting her time gardening. My brother does not read books - but he does read a lot of magazines and newspapers and researches on the internet things that interest him. IMHO he is a reader, just not one of books - and he's far more knowledgeable about current affairs worldwide than I am. He also is a master at finding that amazing little inn in the middle of nowhere. My brother is also the one who failed to understand my choice of major in college (french studies), since it was not a defined career path and I had no desire to teach (he's an engineer/landscape architect). I still think he's trying to puzzle out how french studies led to a law career! He does not consider that a waste of time, especially after he spent time with me in Paris and I was able to introduce him to the history, culture and food without consulting a guidebook.

Besides, reading of all types, but especially I think fiction - and watching tv, playing video games, listening to movies, even social media -- provides you with the basis for so much social interaction that you will engage in through-out your life. No matter what profession you follow, you will be thrust into situations where casual non-threatening conversation with strangers or near strangers is required of you, and all those things your mother has labeled 'time wasters' are the innocuous things that break the ice and allow you to interact at those events without delving into the areas that often create friction - religion, politics, and in NYC baseball (Mets vs. Yankees and god forbid you are from Boston and are a Red Sox fan). As a transactions lawyer, I attend a lot of closings, and there are long periods of time when you are waiting for something -- someone to arrive with the checks, photocopying, clearance on something -- that being able to chat about the latest episode of Game of Thrones, or the latest fiction best seller, or favorite video games is critical - because majority of people spend time on one or all of those things.

So, AJ, do what works for you. It is your life to live. And maybe pick up cross stitch or knitting or some other needlecraft as a hobby which you can do while binge watching movies and favorite tv shows. That's what I do.

Tracy - you will appreciate this after growing up on a farm. One of my chores was going to the Back 40 every evening after supper to herd the cows back to the barn for milking (I grew up on a dairy farm). This was long before audiobooks - back in the dark ages. I perfected the art of walking and herding while reading a book....I was also an ace at washing the dishes with a book propped in front of me. It stopped my mom yelling at me to get my nose out of a book and do my chores :-)

Anita wrote: "OMG, reading fiction is so not a waste of time.

In fact, I think there's a great case to be made that it is less of a waste of time than non-fiction. A lot of non-fiction is a snapshot in time i.e..."

I love to cook too Anita! It is one of my favorite past times-Love the feeling of satisfaction when I hear "oh wow is this good!"

I want to add something to Amy's (and others) comments about writing reviews. For me, it's also a way to memorialize connections and ideas that have been triggered by a book I've read, and the feelings I experienced. Of course, this is not true of all books. There are many I don't review at all.

Plus, writing is how I remember. If I write something down, I will remember it far more definitively than if I just read something. When studying for the bar exam after law school, I took the bar review course where it was primarily lectures where you wrote down what you needed to learn rather than the review where most of your learning was through reading. It meant I spent a lot more time in the lecture hall, but I also didn't have 12 huge books to read over 6 weeks.

So writing a review allows me to remember far better some of the details of what I liked or disliked or was disappointed/shocked by in a book. That way when someone asks me about a book I have read, my answer will be something more than just "I enjoyed it" (which is what a friend of mine inevitably says when I ask her about a new release she just read).

A waste of time?! Say what?! Reading fiction, and subsequently discussing it with this wonderful crowd, enriched my life immeasurably. I have to get ready for work but felt the need to briefly protest! I agree with all of the points made, including Meli’s passion for knowing the next Trim number. I am loving the Trim challenge!

Theresa wrote: "I want to add something to Amy's (and others) comments about writing reviews. For me, it's also a way to memorialize connections and ideas that have been triggered by a book I've read, and the feel..."

I completely agree - my goodreads obsession grew out of the little 'reviews' that I used to jot down in a notebook so I could remember library books that I'd read.

The reviews here really help push me to add or remove a read on the tbr especially as you get an idea for which members like what and how they align with your personal tastes.

Reading is my escape and the one thing I take time to do. It helps me relax and allows me to forget the stress of life. I can be anyone, travel anywhere. Even fiction has helped me learn things by researching something that catches my eye. Being the mother of teenage boys reading the thing that has brought us together. My oldest and I have come up with the craziest of plots and storylines of books we have read. My youngest enjoys German/Nazis era and we have learned so much and it amazes me of his thought process and ideas.

Hello A.J.,
Your questions about reading have sure hit a nerve here, as we all are very interested in reading. This is why we are in the group. I can only answer for myself: I love the time that I spend reading. For me, books are windows to so many different experiences. I can travel to places I've never been, find out about different cultures, and feel a connection to the characters (or real people) in the books I'm reading. Someone once commented that reading is a form of meditation too. You can reflect upon your own life as you see how it relates to the lives you're reading about in books.

If you get a lot of enjoyment from reading, it can only enrich your life. I do not see a down-side.

I'm afraid my mother was of 'reading is a waste of time' school of belief. It was, without doubt, a bone of contention, and I do still have to occasionally silence the 'mom' voice in my head that accuses me of laziness, time wasting, or admonishes me to get up and DO something. I do listen sometimes, because it's unhealthy to sit still all day.

I don't feel guilty that I love to read. I certainly don't feel that it is a waste of time. But reading is essentially a solitary, and selfish act. My mother was a very selfless person. She didn't believe she had value unless she was busy taking care of other people. The very sad thing was that long after she should have felt free to relax, rest and enjoy herself she just didn't know how to do it. After my father passed away, my sister and I plied her with books that she truly enjoyed, but she never finished one without apologizing for the time she spent reading and not getting 'things' done.

Jgrace wrote: "I don't feel guilty that I love to read. I certainly don't feel that it is a waste of time. But reading is essentially a solitary, and selfish act."

I feel like I am busy enough when not reading to more than make up for it! lol.

But, I will say, that is one of the things I love about audiobooks: I can read while doing something else. Cleaning and cooking feel like less of chores, and—on the flip side—my commute feels less like wasted time than it did when I used to just listen to the radio.

Theresa wrote: "That concept of 'wastes time' -- it absolutely turns on the slow burn in me! What exactly is a 'waste of time'? Isn't a 'waste of time' at its core, just what someone else doesn't want to spend his..."

How did you avoid the cow pies?

Tracy wrote: "Theresa wrote: "That concept of 'wastes time' -- it absolutely turns on the slow burn in me! What exactly is a 'waste of time'? Isn't a 'waste of time' at its core, just what someone else doesn't w.

How did you avoid the cow pies

.."

I have a good nose and they only stop smelling when completely dried out 😁

And I could see around the book.... think about all those walking and texting today.

It also turned out to be a handy skill when I moved to NYC in 1973, long before poop scooping laws.

😂

Amy wrote: "Quote from my mother.... You could get so much more done if you weren’t writing reviews! My mother is a book reader and she doesn’t see reading as a waste of time. But somehow the small amount of t..."

Paragraph 3, such a wonderful advice, every word!

Amy wrote: "What i do consider a time waster, but can’t seem to manage, is the social media piece. If I didn’t spend do much time in Goodreads or Facebook, I’d have so much more time to actually read!.."

I definitely agree with you here, Amy! I have been ridiculously busy this week (was my book club on Tuesday evening a time waster, as well, I wonder!?), so I'm just reading through this thread now (and have only read the first couple of replies, so far).

Something else I've read recently is that being a reader/reading lots helps people become more empathetic. I would say that definitely includes reading fiction!

Really, though - what else could be considered a waste of time? There are lots of hobbies you could call a waste of time, I think.

Meli wrote: "... you know what is NOT a waste of time?
Checking the Goodreads PBT group every hour to see if March "trim the tbr" was announced 🤣 SO EXCITED! Can't wait to find out what the number is this month."

LOL!

Nicole R wrote: "But, I will say, that is one of the things I love about audiobooks: I can read while doing something else. Cleaning and cooking feel like less of chores,..."

Yes, this also crossed my mind as I was reading the other replies.

Amy wrote: "one is only wasting time when they are bored, disengaged, or negative, or toxic. If you are connected to yourself and to others, your interests, passions, and engagement with anything, you will never be wasting time. Love, connection, curiosity, pleasure, be it mind, body, heart.... I believe this is what life is about"

THIS. <3 Well said, Amy!

This is a great opinion topic. I am usually an avid reader and read a great deal of fiction, so I don't think that fiction is necessarily a waste of time as that would be completely hypocritical. That said, I can honestly say that there are books I've read where I was wasting time, even if those didn't always fit with Amy's parameters (I like those parameters, btw). The logic part of my brain I just can't see that one could prove that every single book ever written or even that is in print now has the possibility of enriching (definition "to make rich or richer especially by the addition or increase of some desirable quality, attribute, or ingredient") someone's life, and the emotional part of my brain is adamant that that can't be the case.

On a related note, I am not one who advocates that as long as a child is reading it doesn't matter what they read, though, either, and this is probably a result of homeschooling my kids, all of whom were sensitive in different ways. My personal rule, which won't work for everyone, was that they could only read "fluff" books at the library and check out books that weren't "fluff" or that would upset them in ways that weren't going to help them grow or mature. Of course, once they became teens, things loosened up because as they grew up they had to learn to make more and more decisions for themselves.