Play Book Tag discussion
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Reading choices and strategy changes when life looks short
Michael, I am so sorry for what you are going through and my heart goes out to you for healing and peace. Hey to go first on such a charged topic. I can’t remotely so I have been in your shoes, although there have been passed PBT members who have. I will say this. There are topics I just absolutely avoid. I don’t read about the murder, illness, or abduction of children. I stay away from heavy incest or trauma, and sexual abuse, although inevitably it sneaks in. I am unlikely to read the glass Castle or a little life, even though I love the glass Castle. I’m not even the Anna Karenina type. I do think it changes what you read and that what we read changes us. Interesting point of discussion, but you enjoy and savor every thing you do in and out of books. Sending my blessings to you and to your wife.
I've sent you a personal note, Michael. After reading your first sentence. Now, I've read your whole post, and I actually think this is a very intriguing topic that you raise. To be honest, maybe I'm morbid, but I've actually thought about this as in "well half my life is over, am I reading well?" Mostly because I have seen several older people who actually no longer can read. My MIL, an avid reader, has dementia, and it doesn't seem so terribly advanced, but she can no longer read. So it strikes me that ones reading life might be shorter than ones actual life, and I find that vaguely terrifying as well.So, I enjoyed learning about how you are refining your reading list.
My guess is I'd probably lean harder into a way I already tend toward . . .I am the opposite of Amy. I kind like reading books that make me see my own life in the most glowing of terms. Reading about other people who have bigger problems (that they overcome or don't) has always made me feel like my own are more surmountable. So, I'm guessing I'd read more about crazy people climbing Mount Everest . . .
I am pretty sure I'd read some self help/memoir like you mentioned in hopes it would help me face my own challenges, but I could also see how that might also provoke anxiety, so I guess I'd try that and see how it went.
I also imagine picking up a few old favorites to re-read when my brain just didn't have the energy for more. Sometimes I find it hard to read when I feel ill.
One habit I'm sure I'd abandon is my compulsive desire to finish books . . .
Dear Michael ... you are in my prayers ... may God grant you and your family grace, dignity and courage as you walk this path.Would my reading habits change? I don't know, honestly. I read so widely, and I'm already not afraid to abandon a book I'm not "feeling" ... I guess I'd be more quick to drop a book I'm reading "just" to satisfy a challenge. And I'd probably drop most of the challenges as well, and just read for my own enjoyment.
I would NOT abandon my F2F book clubs, though. I get so much enjoyment from talking about books with friends. I might not finish all the selections, but I'd go to the meetings.
I'd definitely want to re-read (or re-listen) to a few favorites:
To Kill a Mockingbird
Tess of the D'Urbervilles
Sense and Sensibility
The House of Mirth
Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress
Amy wrote: "...I am unlikely to read The Glass Castle or A Little Life..."Thanks for your caring concern.
I guess I am less likely to read books that take emotionally wrenching events to the extreme. Like "Fall on Your Knees", which attracted me because of the rural Nova Scotia setting. I have less tolerance for melodrama and perhaps more hunger for authentic struggles with life. As I said, with meaningful life messages.
Book Concierge wrote: "Dear Michael ... you are in my prayers ... And I'd probably drop most of the challenges as well, and just read for my own enjoyment.
I'd definitely want to re-read (or re-listen) to a few favorites:
..."
Thanks for the blessing, Tessa.
Reading for "own enjoyment" is exactly where I'm at, but how that enjoyment is changing is the issue I raise.
The thought of re-reading favorites of all time is not a path I had considered. Definite food for thought.
Anita wrote: "...it strikes me that ones reading life might be shorter than ones actual life, and I find that vaguely terrifying as well...So true. When I dropped from 2-3 books a week to 1-2 per month due to mental incapacity from what started as flu, that was a shock. And the origin of the impetus to become much more selective. And then I had to ask myself about what rules to follow.
Reading about other people who have bigger problems (that they overcome or don't) has always made me feel like my own are more surmountable. So, I'm guessing I'd read more about crazy people climbing Mount Everest . . .
The Glass Castle was like that for me. A dysfunctional family beyond imagination, yet a survivor on the other side who somehow (impossibly) accommodated to the personal history. Love mountain climbing books too. And people who accomplish amazing things, yet still have a core of common human traits we all can identify with--why I like biographies of great presidents, statesmen, generals, inventors, and explorers. Not likely to invest in one of those tomes, like the trilogy I read on Churchill, but am drawn to those sweeping compendiums like Simon Winchester writes. I still lust for a Boorstein history of explorers or inventors.
One habit I'm sure I'd abandon is my compulsive desire to finish books
Perfect hit on that one.
Michael, I’m thinking of you, and hope that your time will be everything you want it to be. I’m so sorry this has happened. My focus would be on what brings me joy: family, friends, my pets and reading. I think my reading choices would be more in the moment. I’d read what sounds good.
Tracy wrote: "...I think my reading choices would be more in the moment. I’d read what sounds good. ..."Sound advice. A related issue is how importance of writing reviews will change. Maybe it feels more important to register a response, but the kind of labor I put in many reviews has to go out the window.
That in turn reminds me of how upset I got when one Goodreads friend, who wrote amazing reviews (Steve Sckenda), had all their reviews removed after he died. I am at well over 1,000 reviews, so the thought of all disappearing when I die is kind of sad. Not sure what the alternative is beyond getting a friend to keep account active at least for some time.
Michael wrote: "Tracy wrote: "...I think my reading choices would be more in the moment. I’d read what sounds good. ..."Sound advice. A related issue is how importance of writing reviews will change. Maybe it fe..."
Oh no, all their reviews were removed? Did someone purposefully delete their account? I can't imagine that Goodreads removed them (unless it was at someone's behest) because those reviews are valuable content for them. As are yours. That's really terrible.
I totally see your point though on cutting down the scope of writing reviews. I mostly write mine for myself - - so I can recall what I read and discuss the book with new readers. They jar my own memory. I think that would be of less importance with a shorter time horizon . . .though I think your reviews have a considerably larger audience because they are professional caliber.
Michael, we have already communicated regarding your health and I hope you know you are in my thoughts.Your question regarding books gives me much to think about.
I know that you are fond of history and wonder if perhaps some which covers the history of your lifetime might be interesting as The Age of Eisenhower: America and the World in the 1950s, American Moonshot: John F. Kennedy and the Great Space Race,Boom! Voices of the Sixties Personal Reflections on the '60s and Today.
I'm also remembering that you enjoy a good western. I unfortunately don't have any to add except Whiskey When We're Dry, which was entertaining but perhaps not up to a 5 star. I'm not sure if you have read Medicine Walk or if it would fulfill a need, but it is excellent.
I'm going to keep mulling this over and you will continue to be in my thoughts.
My thoughts are with you Michael-About 7 years ago I was diagnosed with Degenerative Disc Disease and eventually had 2 major surgeries. I went from a very active 50 yr old to home bound. Reading became my escape from the lonely place I was at.
I decided to go back and read some old favorites. I first picked up
The Fellowship of the Ring, which I had not read since high school. I finished the trilogy and from there started exploring the Fantasy Genre. 6 years later my GR shelf is loaded with fantasy books. Historical Fiction and Non-Fiction History also moved to the top list of books I would reach for. I am a self -proclaimed history nerd now. And those 2 shelf's are also over flowing these days.
I tell you all this because going back and reading a book you remember loving may put you on a whole new trail of authors and books.
The one firm rule I established for myself was that I was never again going to finish a book just for the sake of finishing it. If by chapter 3-4 I am not enjoying it, I stop and find something else.
Thank you for sharing your story. Although you are aware of what is coming, most people never stop to think about what is to come.
For me my illness taught me not to take tomorrow for granted-
I wish you peace and serenity.
Booknblues wrote: "...perhaps some which covers the history of your lifetime might be interesting...I am also remembing you enjoy a good western..."
The Heart of Everything That Is: The Untold Story of Red Cloud, An American Legend
Thanks so much for those recommendations. I am such a fan of David Halberstam and am thinking seriously of his The Fifties. One barrier is its incredible length.
As for western history, I recently enjoyed Empire of the Summer Moon: Quanah Parker and the Rise and Fall of the Comanches, the Most Powerful Indian Tribe in American History and was thinking of following that with The Heart of Everything That Is: The Untold Story of Red Cloud, An American Legend. My related urge to pursue accounts of aboriginal peoples has me wanting to read one that has sat on my shelf for 30 years or more, Under the Mountain Wall, Peter Matthiessen's anthropological memoir of time with a New Guinea tribe.
So my urge is to read what seems most relevant to the meaning of life but also to try to complete a long term quest for books that tap into the core of human nature.
Joanne wrote: "My thoughts are with you Michael-... I went from a very active 50 yr old to home bound. Reading became my escape ..."Touched by your story and impact of reading. Your discussion of the draw of fantasy reminds me I never did complete the third of Pullman's trilogy, "The Amber Spyglass".
Michael I wish you peace, love and happiness. I'm truly sorry to hear this news.I've actually thought about this some after my husband unexpectedly died at a relatively young age. Since his death I'm definitely more inclined to DNF a bad book. My TBR list now mostly consists of books that come highly recommended especially from people here at PBT. I read a lot of series and I'm more likely now to stop reading a series if I'm no longer enjoying it.
In the end I think it's a very personal choice. If I knew I had a very short time left I'd probably try to cram in books I hadn't read by favorite authors while revisiting old favorites. I also know I would spend as much time as I could with family and friends and doing other things I enjoy aside from reading. Not only for my sake but as someone who has grieved a loved one I treasure every minute I had with my husband and I figure the same would hold true for those left to mourn me.
I'm so grateful to you for proposing this discussion topic, Michael. It is something I've been thinking about recently. In the past month, I've had two people ask me for audiobook recommendations. My sister asked for a colleague undergoing chemo and a friend whose doctor suggested audiobooks as a pain management technique wanted a list. They have me well tagged as an audiobook addict. I know that when my physical and mental energy is at low ebb, listening is easier than focusing attention on text.
I expect that I will continue to do what I have done in the past, particularly when life has been challenging. I treat reading as comfort food. I'd read poets who offer something new with every rereading and reread books with my favorite characters. I'm sure I'd be very selective about new books, but which way that would go would depend on my energy level.
Michael wrote: "Joanne wrote: "My thoughts are with you Michael-... I went from a very active 50 yr old to home bound. Reading became my escape ..."Touched by your story and impact of reading. Your discussion of..."
And now you have reminded me that I only read The Golden Compass-I will have to reread it in order to move on-Thank you for the reminder😉
I tend not to re-read. And that’s what her time as long as she went. It’s actually very rare that I will be read a book even when I have absolutely adored and loved it.
Oh, Michael. I'm so sorry to hear this.My initial reaction was I have no idea! But, reading through other replies...
I think, like Anita, I hope I would be more likely to set aside a book if I'm not enjoying it.
I like the ideas of rereading old favourites, as a few people have mentioned, though I (currently) so rarely reread. I do feel like I would really enjoy that.
I probably would read more of the "self-help" type like you mentioned, and Anita, as well, I think. I know when I have a sick cat, I try to read as much about it as I can (although that's not usually books). Would I do that for me? I might.
The other thing that came to my mind, though I'm not sure, is that I don't know that I would add more to the tbr. I would look back and try to get to what's already been waiting for me to read for a long time.
Michael, I am sorry to hear this, and you are now in my thoughts and prayers.This is a great question. I can't say for sure, but given that I am getting closer and closer to 60, I have changed my reading habits. This year I am being a rebellious reader and mainly reading books I want to read or feel like reading. I have read so many different kinds of books over my life that I don't feel much of a need to stretch my palate as I used to, since I have always tended to have somewhat eclectic tastes, but they have changed somewhat over the years.
I suspect that I would spend time reading books that are important to me and also books that help me have fun and are more positive. I'd avoid reading dark books and too many books on health, but would read a few self-help books. I probably would reread some old favourites. But then there would be days when I'd just want to watch a funny and/or feel-good movie and I might not bother reading much at all.
First, hugs to you, your family and friends. May all of you enjoy each of the coming days to the fullest, as the treasures they are. And have always been. Your question about reading as the life before you no longer seems infinite struck such a chord for me; it actually shed light on some changes I made to my own reading habits not long ago. Diminished future time for reading...that also comes with advancing age. I turned 60 a few years ago, and for the first time ever, a birthday gave me pause, for a host of reasons, not least knowing that there are not endless vibrant years ahead - whatever time it is, it is finite and no longer far far away. Also over the years since that epic birthday, several close friends only 10 or so years older have passed or are coping with various serious and limiting health issues. Without consciously realizing it, this all heavily influenced my reading habits.
What changes? Well, I actually started diversifying my reading much more. Instead of just reading 'the next' by authors in my comfort genres (mysteries, romances, historicals), I started reading more general fiction. I have a huge personal print and ebook library with enough unread books in it to require I live to 110 to read them all, assuming I no longer add to it. I started reading owned books, especially ones that keep catching my eye, setting modest goals to read a certan number a year.
I also have picked a few bigger, harder reads that I have always wanted to read - Ulysses, all of Proust (I have read some) - to read in next few years while my energy level is good and vision still strong.
I would do some rereads, but those are favorite comfort reads. Tolkien again, finish Sue Grafton series, reread Dunnett's Lymond series and read her Niccolo Rising one.
I will no doubt in future revert to reading far more new books from favorite genres and authors, but that is to be expected. All would be diversion, escape, nothing taxing.
I don't read much non-fiction now, except memoir or biography, and would likely avoid it. Definitely no self-help books. Escape is what I would be looking for.
Most of all, I would keep reading and talking books that intrigue me, or comfort me, or excite me, and talking about them. Whatever genre they may be.
On the deletion of reviews, check your settings and see if there is a selection to be made. Most social media sites (Facebook for example) have a selection you make as to whether your page can be shut down or kept active. There should be a policy statement somewhere. If not, make sure your family and executor have instructions on what you prefer so it is not simply closed down when email and other accounts are closed.
Online presence and what is to happen with it is something we all need to address for ourselves and our families.
Most of all, whatever your reading choices, they should give you joy.
Great line of comments and meqningful strategies. I appreciate the kind support too. So true that aging itself already shapes reading patterns regardless of any health issues.
I'm so sorry to hear your news, Michael. I hope you have all the support you need as you go through this.I think your attitude and approach to your reading is just right! As I've grown older I have less patience with books that don't bring me pleasure or satisfaction, and I've learned not to waste my time by dropping books without the guilt I used to feel in my youth.
I wish for you many hours of happy reading.
I had another thought. I don't drive, so I would likely (I suppose, depending how easy it is for me to get around) go with books I can get as an ebook or audio, rather than a physical book. I'd likely still primarily use library books, but ebooks and audio can be downloaded and I don't have to pick them up and drop them off. So, depending what my library has available would likely affect what I decide to read.
I am not usually a person who is knocked speechless but that is how I feel after reading your post, Michael. I pray for your comfort, love and family.I would definitely be more likely to not finish any book that just wasn't speaking to me. Reading books by my favorite authors including series that I enjoy would be a priority. Books on meditation might be a good fit. I'm sorry...I am rambling here. I so want to have words of wisdom for you but I feel unable to get my mind around your situation. I would reread everything by Kent Haruf as he has been my favorite author for quite a few years.
Michael, peace be with you.
Michael,I am trying to imagine how I would change my reading habits. After being in a bad wreck last year, I have decided to read just what I feel like reading. Make my reading decisions in the moment. I have trouble imaging myself becoming a DNF reader.
I would definitely finish any series and any favorite authors.
Michael wrote: "That in turn reminds me of how upset I got when one Goodreads friend, who wrote amazing reviews (Steve Sckenda), had all their reviews removed after he died. ..."Michael ...
Our good PBT friend Jolene passed in Oct, and was last active on Goodreads in Aug 2018. Her account is still open and her reviews / comments sill posted.
I suggest you contact
Support (at) Goodreads (dot) com)
Ask your question about your account / reviews being deleted. I do not think this is automatic (unless perhaps you Goodreads account is linked with Amazon.com? or Facebook?) I think someone would have to specifically go in and delete the account.
I DO know that deleting the account WILL delete all the reviews. It may or may not delete your comments in various threads. I think you have to specify whether to delete comments when you are deleting an account.
In any case, the support team should be able to definitively answer these questions for you.
Wishing you love, Michael and your family. Your honesty and openness is admirable with this topic, and what a thought provoking of a subject this is.I can only imagine how this kind of situation changes your life, but reading in particular- I'd probably just say "eff it" and read a bunch of "junk". I try hard to stay both "up to date" reading new releases, hyped books, popular book club reads. I also try make sure to try and keep my reading well-rounded- mixing fiction/non fiction, getting in some contemporaries. As well as making sure to engage in challenges (Horizons, Trim the TBR, monthly tag), and not "binging" too much on my guilty pleasure reads (currently: true crime and psychological thrillers, I imagine this will change with time).
I can see myself rereading all the Harry Potters, and binging on books that may not have "educational value" but are guilty pleasure reads.
My mom (who is in average health and is nowhere near even talking about the big D word) has a very different approach to reading that I do. If she isn't invested in a book by about 20-40 pages, she reads the ending. Then decides if she wants to read the whole book or not. It's kind of an insane strategy, but definitely keeps her only reading books that will give her the time investment she is looking to make.
First, Michael, my heart goes out to you. I can't imagine what you are going through. I wish I had something profound to say, but I am glad you can share in some interesting discussion about reading despite your situation. I don't have anything more useful to add that other members haven't touched on, but wanted to expound on Joi's comment and get other's thoughts...
Joi wrote: "My mom (who is in average health and is nowhere near even talking about the big D word) has a very different approach to reading that I do. If she isn't invested in a book by about 20-40 pages, she reads the ending. "
I really want to do this and tell myself I will do this, but I cannot bring myself to actually execute this tactic. I know a girl who gives a book 20 pages TOPS! I think that is insane as I have seen books come to life after even 50 pages in.
At the same time, the further I get the more I feel like I might as well finish.
Are other people quitting after 20 pages or so?
Do you often DNF a book?
Meli wrote: "First, Michael, my heart goes out to you. I can't imagine what you are going through. I wish I had something profound to say, but I am glad you can share in some interesting discussion about readin..."Meli, I always give a a book 4-5 chapters(more if they are short chapters). I have tried Joi's moms strategy and each time I end up saying : "Well, I know how it ends so what's the point?"
Last year was the first time I kept track of my DNF on GR. I had 18-already this year I have 3 soon to be 4 as I am teetering with one I am reading right now. In 2018 I just decided I was no longer going to finish a book I was not enjoying-(HA! then the mods sprung Horizons and Trim on us, and believe me both my books from this month would have been tossed back if not for those.)
Joanne wrote: "Meli wrote: "First, Michael, my heart goes out to you. I can't imagine what you are going through. I wish I had something profound to say, but I am glad you can share in some interesting discussion..."LOL - that was going to be my next question; what about trim or horizons challenges. Wow, that must be painful.
Book Concierge wrote: "...Ask your question about your account / reviews being deleted. I do not think this is automatic . ..."Good to know.
(I would definitely like Facebook files to go away when I'm gone.)
Joi wrote: "Wishing you love, Michael and your family. ...I'd probably just say "eff it" and read a bunch of "junk"...My mom (who is in average health and is nowhere near even talking about the big D word) has a very different approach to reading that I do. "Yeah, go for the guilty pleasures. I truly love your idea of rereading all the Harry Potters.
Your mom reminds me of those who nibble a lot of chocolates in a box to find the best. Makes me laugh. Still, knowing the ending too soon really does spoil things.
Meli wrote: "First, Michael, my heart goes out to you. ...Are other people quitting after 20 pages or so?
Do you often DNF a book?"
I probably DNF only 1% of books taken up. But it seems that if you stop within the first 50 pages, that's sort of like deciding not to read a book at all based on a sample. In other words, not really qualifying for a DNF tag. When I read 300 pages of a 600 pager and stop, that is sort of a review element all by itself. Wonder how many people register DNFs on their shelves.
Hello, I don't think I've got anything new to add, but didn't want to just click on past without adding my best wishes.If I try to imagine myself in your position I'd be thinking about what I genuinely want to read rather than feeling obliged to tackle lists of prescribed classics etc. or stick to any particularly worthy topics. As a couple of people have already said, I feel that I would probably start by going back to old favourites and immersing myself in them and then seeing where they lead. (After Ursula K Le Guin's death last year I went back and re-read the Earthsea books, starting from the first ones that I loved when I was a child, and going on through the 4th one that I picked up as a teenager, all the way into ones that came out later that I hadn't read before. It felt like a comforting journey through my own past as well as a lovely burst of escapism.)
Michael wrote: "Your mom reminds me of those who nibble a lot of chocolates in a box to find the best. Makes me laugh. Still, knowing the ending too soon really does spoil things. "You've figured her out- she absolutely 100% does that!! Lol!! Seriously, can't share a box of See's candy with her!
I try and give a book at least to 10-20%, that way if it's a slow burner- it would give more of a chance to pick up. If I "don't make it" that far- I won't even track it on GR. I don't add books to my "currently reading" until I've decided if I'm committed or not.
Nikki wrote: "Hello, I don't think I've got anything new to add, but didn't want to just click on past without adding my best wishes...."
Thanks for sharing. Homing in what one genuinely wants to read is the key point when time no longer seems infinite. Le Guine sounds wonderful to revisit.
Wow, I'm blown away by your announcement and how great it is that you share with us this way - by making us stretch our minds a bit. Wishing you peace and love in your journey.You mentioned Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End which is right up there with my favorite books. I would probably run right back and reread this one. You can put me in the "never rereads books" camp. However, I would want to read that and The Last Lecture and maybe Tuesdays with Morrie again. Sort of those uplifting books that look at end of life issues with just the right amount of humor.
As for other books, like many here I wouldn't invest too much time in a book I wasn't enjoying; less than I do now anyway. I tend to read through to see if a book gets better - there are very few I DNF but I do have books in that category.
In the past, I've read lots of series. Since joining Shelfari in 2008, I read more general fiction and I read in many, many categories. Even some westerns though I'm very picky about them. I would continue doing that but might make it a point of going back to some of the series that I've let fall by the wayside. I'd want books that make me feel something, humor, love, excitement but maybe not too much horror!
I think I would continue to participate by doing reviews, etc. Sort of leaving my legacy. I doubt I'd feel so driven to read the tag or participate in challenges. I'd have a lot more in the Other category.
I also think I'd go back to rereading but not until I found it hard to concentrate on new material, choosing to indulge in books I've loved over the years. I love audios and I expect I'd continue with with that if reading a page or holding a book became in issue. I might even ask someone to read to me as a way of sharing what I love with those I love.
However, as someone else alluded to, I would not let the solitary activity of reading keep me from being with others whom I love and who love me. I'd try to make memories, those are so important to those we leave behind.
Michael - I just remembered Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life by Anne Lamott, a book I absolutely loved and recommend highly, and how she talks about her search for books on the end of life that had humor in them while dealing with her father's death. It led her to write Hard Laughter. I'd absolutely search out some of her books as she is self-deprecating, very funny, uplifting. I am easily turned off by overly Christian (or any religion actually) books, and though her faith is strong and evident, it did not in any way overwhelm Bird by Bird, nor lead me to think for a second of DNF.
Barbara wrote: "Wow, I'm blown away by your announcement and how great it is that you share with us this way - by making us stretch our minds a bit. Wishing you peace and love in your journey...."
Wonderful line of reflections and recommendations. All pointing in various ways to how reading is vital to living as a human and how autumn in life can inspire choices with more potency or magic to transport us beyond ordinary travails.
To Theresa:
Thanks for that recommendation.
In my aspirations I forgot about humor. I have some comic tales worth dusting off, from Tom Sharp, to Brysons missed, and to dark humor masterpieces somehow missed (Catch22 for one).
Michael, so surprised that you missed Catch 22. It is one of the few I have read twice and think that you will like it.
Booknblues wrote: "Michael, so surprised that you missed Catch 22. It is one of the few I have read twice and think that you will like it."In that case I'd had the pleasure of the movie. But if there are other satirical black humor tales that come to mind let me know. Rushdie's The Golden House and The Sympathizer were recent satires I appreciated.
Michael - I've been thinking about your post ever since I read it this past Sunday. First off, I wish you the best and you are in my thoughts. So what would I do? This is what I've been thinking about all week. I think I would pick a group of people most dear to me (regardless of whether they are readers or not, but I would definitely include some that are readers I respect the most) and I would give each of them a hand-picked favorite book of mine and ask them to read it with me and then spend time with them afterwards to share why I picked it for them and just talk thru what we both loved about the book. For my most respected readers, I would ask them to reciprocate and pick for me their favorite book for me to read and then replicate the sharing experience noted above. My hope would be that somehow I memorialize myself with that book to that person and that whoever that person recommends that book to and whoever reads it as a result in a way carries my memory and love of books well beyond my earthly existence. In a way, me and my favorite books become timeless. I don't know about you but I find there are fewer better feelings than when a person you recommend a great book to shows true gratitude and appreciation for opening their life up to the experience they had and whatever the book did for them. The more I think about this, the more I think I may just start to do this now and not wait until my end. Thank you for raising this question and making me think about my relationship with books.
Charlie wrote: "Michael - I've been thinking about your post ever since I read it this past Sunday. First off, I wish you the best and you are in my thoughts. So what would I do? This is what I've been thinking ab..."Wow, I love this idea!
Thanks so much for such a heartfelt recommendation. You are a true mensch. I am thinking poetry would work well with the idea more than novels. For me Wallace Steven's "Sunday Morning" is one I hope to share. The one that starts with:"Coffee and oranges and a sunny chair
And the green freedom of a cockatoo..."
At work they gave me a Sunshine Box. Included was a poetry book by Mary Olliver.
Kind regards,
Charlie wrote: "Michael - I've been thinking about your post ever since I read it this past Sunday. First off, I wish you the best and you are in my thoughts. So what would I do? This is what I've been thinking ab..."Charlie, that is an absolutely beautiful idea! Should I ever find myself in this situation I believe I will do this! And this also gave me the idea to make a list of all the books I own, and who I would want to have each one! Again-beautiful idea.
Charlie wrote: "Michael - I've been thinking about your post ever since I read it this past Sunday. First off, I wish you the best and you are in my thoughts. So what would I do? This is what I've been thinking ab..."What a generous and giving strategy! Makes me think immediately of which dear friend would get which book.
Charlie wrote: "Michael - I've been thinking about your post ever since I read it this past Sunday. First off, I wish you the best and you are in my thoughts. So what would I do? This is what I've been thinking ab..."Terrific idea! And it reminded me of how much some of the books I own and love are linked to specific people in my life - either because they gave them to me, or the book reflects something we shared, or it's a book we discovered and enjoyed together. For example, Harry Potter series will forever be linked for me with my friend Lauretta, and vice versa, as I introduced her to them and we ended up doing the whole 'purchase at midnight' thing for each new book. I probably would take those books, write a note to stick in them, and see that they were delivered to each person at a certain time.
Charlie and Michael, In my job as a librarian, I often gave and still give friends lots of book recommendations. I get to know what they like and can usually blend that with something I like. Charlie, you are so very right, it is the best feeling in the world to hear that a book you recommended had an impact.That said, I have a story. My first move toward my library career was as a volunteer in the school library where I had contact with lots of young people including kids in my sons's elementary class. A few years ago, one of those girls was struggling to overcome a terrible cancer. She was probably early 40s and the mother of two young children. When she realized that the cancer was winning, she started to leave things for them for when she was gone. One of them was the book Mrs Frisby and the Rats of NIMH. She wrote a note on the title page of the book: "This was one of my favorite books! Scott Morse's mom was the librarian and read it to our class, she made it like a movie in my head! Enjoy, love, Mom"
I have to tell you that she shared that on Facebook and my son made sure I didn't miss it. It definitely made me cry! What a wonderful thing she did by leaving a book she loved for her kids with a personal note.
This book idea is fabulous, and fits in with the book I read last year on the Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning (not just for ill people!) One of the parts was devoted to giving special things to people that you no longer needed that had memories attached (I might be melding more than one part in my mind or taking an idea I had while reading it and adding to it, but I am not sure since it was a library copy and I can't check it).
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The Sympathizer (other topics)The Golden House (other topics)
Hard Laughter (other topics)
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It's a little bit different from the old question of what handful of books you'd want on hand when stuck in a deserted island. For some reason, neither key classics I have neglected nor new books that are gathering a lot of buzz are areas of attraction. Instead, I have the urge to read the ones that I have long had an affinity for because of their special life lessons or revelations about particular geographies and place (think Kent Haruf for example). In that vein, I look forward to The Book of Ebenezer Le Page, Crow Lake, and Stoner.
Another category of TBR that rises to the surface and high-quality escape lit. Like sci fi that can take you out of this world to one full of wonder and adventure. I aim for more in The Expanse series by the duo known as Corey. Slipping in some neglected classics such as from P.K. Dick is also on my agenda.
And I guess I will continue to be a sucker for some of my favorite mystery series, like ones from Craig Johnson, Michael Connelly, William Krueger, Lee Child, and John Sandford. When the characters come to feel like family members, I will always want to catch up with them while I can.
I have pursued reading challenges in recent years for literature of various countries and places (e.g. Poland and Turkey). For some reason, such foreign literature has less of a pull. But my focus on a lot of ancient lit last year, does make me want to read and learn more about the history of non-Western civilizations. For example, the story of Ancient Egypt and of Persia are blank slates for me, and somehow I feel it a shame to continue in my short span in such ignorance.
Many might suggest self-help type of books for people struggling with serious health issues. Though I feel no pull in that direction, I would have to say how uplifting it was to read Gawande's Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End and memoirs of people dealing with death and grief (e.g. Mortality and The Year of Magical Thinking). I haven't read it, but I imagine Bright-Sided: How the Relentless Promotion of Positive Thinking Has Undermined America could be beneficial for dealing with a lot of nonsense people can dump on folks facing death.
I am looking forward to at least several years with a good quality of life and decent functioning, but the mental concerns, pain issues, and pin drugs themselves highlight the need for books that don't require a lot of keen concentration. Shorter books. Books not so hard to understand. Still, I feel the urge to complete one of those challenging reads of massive scope. Having worked hard to knock off some of Pynchon's more difficult reads, I look forward to the fun-factor and comic adventure of his Mason & Dixon.
So how would your reading plans change if you thought you had only a few years to live? Would you lean more to escapist fare, classics, or home in on sentimental fare or others that have been kicking around on your TBR?