Read Women discussion

This is the thread for our March non-fiction read. The theme was essays and we will be reading Men Explain Things to Me by Rebecca Solnit.


Men Explain Things to Me
In her comic, scathing essay “Men Explain Things to Me,” Rebecca Solnit took on what often goes wrong in conversations between men and women. She wrote about men who wrongly assume they know things and wrongly assume women don’t, about why this arises, and how this aspect of the gender wars works, airing some of her own hilariously awful encounters.
She ends on a serious note— because the ultimate problem is the silencing of women who have something to say, including those saying things like, “He’s trying to kill me!”
This book features that now-classic essay with six perfect complements, including an examination of the writer Virginia Woolf ’s embrace of mystery, of not knowing, of doubt and ambiguity, a highly original inquiry into marriage equality, and a terrifying survey of the scope of contemporary violence against women.

Rebecca Solnit
Rebecca Solnit is an American author who often writes on the environment, politics, place, and art. Her writing has appeared in numerous publications in print and online, including the Guardian newspaper and Harper's Magazine. Solnit has received two NEA fellowships for Literature, a Guggenheim Fellowship, a Lannan literary fellowship, and a Wired Rave Award for writing on the effects of technology on the arts and humanities. In 2010 Utne Reader magazine named Solnit as one of the "25 Visionaries Who Are Changing Your World". Her The Faraway Nearby (2013) was nominated for a National Book Award, and shortlisted for the 2013 National Book Critics Circle Award.
She is credited with the concept behind the term "mansplaining."


Carol will be leading the discussion this month.

This has been on my reading list for a while now so looking forward to finally reading it.

I am about half way through reading this essay. I have yet to read anything comic. The section about violence against women is wince inducing. It is one story after another of horrific incidents that I recall seeing on the news or reading about. I remember my reaction of anger and thinking why women must always be afraid. For example, as a runner when I am on a trail alone, why must I have in the back of my mind that I have to stay alert? I cannot just let my mind wander and I have to carry my pepper spray. When I cross paths with a man, I make sure to make eye contact to let him know I'm paying attention.

Sophie wrote: "I am about half way through reading this essay. I have yet to read anything comic. The section about violence against women is wince inducing. It is one story after another of horrific incidents th..."

Sophie, I haven’t finished the first essay, but am bracing myself for The Longest War, the second essay, which is the one I thought addressed how women’s lives and freedoms are constrained by this everpresent obligation to avoid male violence. I have to admit im also looking forward to the validation that our lack of freedom is an issue. My husband has no idea what it’s like not to be able to take a walk at 2 am simply because one wants to. Among other things.

The acknowledgments , at the end of the book, provide some good info and insights that I recommend reading upfront. About Solnit’s mom, feminism, and the origins and differences between the versions of these essays published in this volume versus the versions previously published.

For example, with respect to “The Longest War” and the other essays first published at TomDispatch, online versions include links to sources for stats, anecdotes and quotes. Those references are omitted from this book. Here’s a link to the online version at TomDispatch, which includes a ton of live links to those sources.

http://www.tomdispatch.com/post/17564...

Note that all of these essays are edited versions distinct from the originals.

Men Explain Things To Me is the first essay and only 18 pages long. The remaining essays are:

The Longest War

Worlds Collidein a Luxury Suite: Some Tboughts on the IMF, Global Injustice, and ia Stranger on a Train

In Praise of the Threat: What Marriage Eauality Really Means

Grandmother Spider

Woolf’s Darkness: Embracing the Inexplicable

Pandora’s Box and the Volunteer Police Force

Men explain things to me, still. And no man has ever apologized for explaining, wrongly, things that I know and they don’t. Not yet, but according to the actuarial tables, I may have another forty-something years to live, more or less, so it could happen. Though I’m not holding my breath.

Another version of this which I’ve experienced many times is when a man won’t explain something technical about which I’ve asked a direct question, in the context of a work project, but characterizes his refusal as not declining, but instead graciously wanting to spare me the boredom that too deep a technical explanation might produce. Dude, I asked and I need to know. I think my brain can process your words if you’d consider giving it a chance.

The Mason Mayer story on page 28 is breathtaking.

On page 36: Think of how much time and energy we would have to focus on other things that matter if we weren’t so busy surviving.

At the link is an intriguing NYTimes feature entitled, How Rebecca Solnit became the Voice of the Resistance.”

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/08/08/t-...

This is the first I’ve read of Solnit... ever. I am a big fan of her writing style, her ability to shape an argument and drive it to a strong conclusion. I am also a fan, bless her, of the fact that each of these essays is reasonably short. They can be read in between other life tasks. They aren’t so dense that you have to reread sections for any reason other than your enjoyment.

Grandmother Spider is my favorite so far, because it speaks to the importance of retaining our identity and telling our own stories, and reminds us that women haven’t been allowed to tell their own stories in all media available to men throughout history.

I love this final paragraph: To spin the web and not be caught in it, to create the world, to create your own life, to rule your fate, to name the grandmothers as well as the fathers, to draw nets and not just straight lines, to be a maker as well as a cleaner, to be able to sing and not be silenced,to take down the veil and appear: all these are the banners on the laundry line I hang out.

If you’ve started reading these essays, what are your impressions? Which essay is most powerful?

On a more provocative note, are these essays universal or do they primarily reflect the concerns of middle- and upper class-women? If one is struggling to avoid eviction and feed her children, is she concerned about whether her ancestors have historically been acknowledged?

I read this around two years ago. I enjoyed it although I did think there were gaps in her analysis, specifically, her failure to address the intersectionality of how racism, classism, and sexism create overlapping systems of oppression. Also, she paints developing countries with the same homogenous paintbrush. But she does a nice job of explaining some of the basic tenets of feminism.

My review: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show...

Carol wrote: "This is the first I’ve read of Solnit... ever. I am a big fan of her writing style, her ability to shape an argument and drive it to a strong conclusion. I am also a fan, bless her, of the fact tha..."

I've just started reading this. I agree with Sophie, I don't see the comic tone that is suggested in the blurb (unless they are referring to the amusing part of the anecdote in Men Explain Things to Me where (view spoiler)[ the man is telling her about the book she actually wrote (hide spoiler)]) but I do agree that her writing style has an easy flow to it and her arguments are well shaped.

I thought she seemed almost a little apologetic in the first essay. She clearly has some good anecdotes that support her argument yet she spends a lot of time countering her own argument by stressing that it is only some men that do this and she also seems kind of uncomfortable with the idea of being credited with the term "mansplaining".

So far I've only read the first two essays but "The Longest War" definitely seems more powerful. The topic of the essay is more distressing and it is supported with so many examples and statistics.

Your comments are thoughtful as well as provocative, Liesl. I don’t have your depth of familiarity with other feminist essays, so appreciate the comparisons you make, on their face.

I’m not certain I would characterize an essay published in 2014 as “old,” but I did find it interesting that these versions are not identical to the originally published versions.

I was glad I could find the online version of a Longest War for the footnotes since I am a footnote kind of girl. I’m surprised the publisher didn’t think it was worth adding 5-6 pages to this skim volume to give its readers the same resources as online readers, but Solnit suggests in her afterward that she supports that call.

Just to play devil’s advocate, essays, like short stories, have to be laser-focused. If a reader is looking for a full discussion of a problem, its context, and solutions, then that requires a book, or at least a nonfiction work in excess of 100 pages. What’s the market — outside of academia — for a book proposing feminist solutions to domestic violence, stranger violence, mutual respect between genders, pay equity, marriage equality and more, by a little-known woman author? 5000 units?

As with essays pertaining to race, readers of feminist essays fall across a spectrum. Perhaps this collection is better suited to readers who haven’t already read a ton on these topics, so articulating the problem remains fresh for them. I have read bits and pieces of a fair amount of feminist literature, but not scholarly treatises and nothing of Solnit’s, and probably not a lot in the last decade. So I’m another audience. You may represent the best-read and most educated audience, and these essays don’t hold anything new for you.

I don’t think you really want to read essays, though. Is it possible that you’re simply past that Ms. magazine, ten pages or less, general-public-targeted work, and seek something targeting feminism 400-level coursework? It met my needs perfectly, as a Gloria Steinem and not Germaine Greer reader, if you know what
I mean, and I shared The Longest War with my 17-year old daughter, and she loved it.

Different women at different places in their examination of these topics, perhaps?

My copy finally arrived today!

Have read the first essay now and plan to crack on with the rest this evening.

Carol wrote: "As with essays pertaining to race, readers of feminist essays fall across a spectrum. Perhaps this collection is better suited to readers who haven’t already read a ton on these topics, so articulating the problem remains fresh for them. .."

I think you're absolutely right.

I think those of us who have immersed ourselves in feminist critiques (I taught Women's Studies for a number of years before I retired) would find this collection to be a good intro but perhaps lacking in depth.

I had the same problem with We Should All Be Feminists. As you suggest, Solnit is targeting a more general audience as is Adichie. And both are to be commended for presenting the tenets of feminism in a succinct and accessible manner.

Louise wrote: "My copy finally arrived today!

Have read the first essay now and plan to crack on with the rest this evening."

Yay! It goes well with wine, btw :)

Tamara wrote: "Carol wrote: "As with essays pertaining to race, readers of feminist essays fall across a spectrum. Perhaps this collection is better suited to readers who haven’t already read a ton on these topic..."

I’m so glad you reminded me of, We Should All Be Feminists, Tamara. That was one that I read last year and thought, I like this woman and want to read more of her work and, also, I need way more substance than this essay offers, but my 17-year old self would have been wowed.

Carol wrote: "I don’t think you really want to read essays, though. Is it possible that you’re simply past that Ms. magazine, ten pages or less, general-public-targeted work, and seek something targeting feminism 400-level coursework? .."

I feel as if there must be some misunderstanding in the way I am expressing myself. I do read essays. I read a variety of styles of writing. I just don't think these essays are well-written.

I expressed my frustration that by choosing to collate a bunch of previously published (on-line) essays in this work, the author missed the opportunity to take the titled essay and investigate further the causes and potential solutions or ways forward. I don't think that an academic book is the only alternative.

I found this article and hopefully it might better explain what I am trying to say about the flaws of this work.

https://thewalrus.ca/why-i-dont-read-...

Thanks for the link, Liesl. That was a really interesting read. As you do read essays quite a bit, who would you recomend as a more advanced femisit essay writer?

Am only a few essays in but fall halfway between the two points of view in this argument. So far, it's not really introducing any revelatory or new concepts (or ways to combat misogynist oppression). It's begginers feminism, which I'm guessing is what most of her readers, when it was first published, neeeded (and have hopefully now moved beyond).

I'm not finding is as lacking in substance as I found We Should All Be Feminists (which was nice but told me literally nothing new), it sort of feels like the next stepping stone up from that on the feminist reading path but still accessible for someone who maybe hasn't identified as feminist before.

Am also disapointed, now that I know that early versions of each essay is available for free online, that her UK publisher has the collection only available in hardback for £13. I'd really expect to be getting at least something new in a published collection and especially for that price. As you say, a development of the theme of the title essay and how to combat the phenomenon would have been ideal.


While I'm generally liking the writing, I found the 'He is France, she is Africa' metaphor in the IMF essay absolutely torturous. And would have liked more about IMF policies rather than the rhepetition of this rather laboured rhetoric device every two sentences.

Am hoping it gets a bit more intersectional.

Liesl wrote: "Carol wrote: "I don’t think you really want to read essays, though. Is it possible that you’re simply past that Ms. magazine, ten pages or less, general-public-targeted work, and seek something tar..."

@liesl - I'm sorry - it's not you, it's me. I didn't explain what I was thinking when I said that. My mind was jumping to how much ground an essay can cover and my conclusion was - one can't describe where we are, how we got here, what the challenges are and also, here are some solutions, in a 20 - 25 page work - in my opinion and I might be entirely wrong. For me, an essay can cover solutions, but readers have to then come to it knowing all the rest, or the writer needs at least 75+ pages, which seems no longer an essay, but that may simply be my own personal standard and not a widely-agreed definition.

I look forward to following the link you shared when I get home from work, too. Thanks for sharing it.

Most importantly, though, it's not you, it's me.

Louise wrote: "Thanks for the link, Liesl. That was a really interesting read. As you do read essays quite a bit, who would you recomend as a more advanced femisit essay writer?..."

I tend to read anything I come across. That sounds pretty vague but basically if I am reading an article or a review in a newspaper and they reference a particular essay or a person worth reading, then I seek out that work. I also follow the London Review of Books and the Paris Review so when I see an essay there I read it. There is an online magazine called Feministing.com.

When I was studying at Uni, I covered the basics with Mary Wollstonecraft, Virginia Woolfe's essays, Simone de Behaviour, Germaine Greer, Elaine Showalter, Helene Cixous and Luce Irigaray. I also read a lot of academic articles related to Gender and PostColonial literature. At the moment, I have bell Hooks, Audre Lorde, Kate Millett and Roxanne Gay on my TBR list.

Tamara might know of good essay writers as I noticed that she taught Women's Studies.

I haven't started the essays by Solnit and probably won't bother now. From what I gather from this thread and the article Liesl linked, Solnit never goes beyond essentially feminism 101 ideas. I would prefer to spend my time on something a little more advanced. I'm not criticizing anyone who reads and enjoys Solnit's essays, I simply feel I am looking for more at this point.

Liesl, thanks for the link. It was an interesting view on Solnit's career and these essays. But another article linked at the bottom of this article was even more in to me. It was about women who hate feminism. These aren't exactly modern day Phyllis Schlafly types, but they come close. One woman advocates taking the vote from women because we support and vote to "destroy the world men built for us but don't pay the blood consequences" since we aren't eligible for the draft. And this woman has, unsurprisingly, a popular blog where she enjoys baiting and trashing talking feminists.

Laurie wrote: "Liesl, thanks for the link. It was an interesting view on Solnit's career and these essays. But another article linked at the bottom of this article was even more in to me. It was about women who hate feminism."

I hadn't even noticed that article but thanks for pointing it out. I don't know why it still surprises me when I come across women who proudly state they are not feminists but it is amazing how many people seem to misunderstand what feminism means and what it has done for their lives. I wonder if that blogger realises that taking the vote away from women would also take away her own vote, and probably also her blog? Still it is the CEOs that are most disappointing.

I taught Women's Studies for a number of years before I moved into administration as an academic dean and then as the VP for Academic Services. I retired in 2013, so my research on feminism is well over a decade out of date.

At the time I taught WS, Camille Paglia was the big name in academic circles as an anti-feminist. It seems as if the club of vocal women who declare themselves to be anti-feminists has expanded considerably since then.

I can tell you that at the beginning of each WS class, I would ask my students for a show of hands as to whether or not they considered themselves to be feminists. Maybe one or two hands would go up. Then I would ask how many of you believe that women should have the same rights and opportunities as men? Without exception, every hand would go up.

My point is that there is so much that is misunderstood about feminism. And some of these misunderstanding have, unfortunately, been perpetuated by feminists. Some white feminists tend to downplay the impact of race and class and just focus on gender. That is a mistake because these are three interlocking circles of oppression that cannot be disentangled. People assume feminism condemns stay-at-home mothers. It doesn't. It shouldn't. I could go on and on with examples. But I'll spare you.

The article on women who proudly proclaim themselves anti-feminists has shown me that they have become more vocal. But I remain hopeful. Maybe I'm just being optimistic. But I see society inching its way in the right direction. I see an increasing number of women speaking up against sexual harassment and sexual assault. The women's US Soccer team is suing for comparable pay with the men's soccer team. There is a movement against airbrushing of photos of models in magazines. And there was a segment on national news the other day about women in their 80s and 90s who have developed huge followings as fashion icons. I see that as a celebration of cronedom.

These are small steps, I recognize. But they are steps in the right direction. I'm not suggesting we are anywhere near where we need to be. But I am seeing signs of progress. So whether people call themselves feminists or not, as long as society is inching forward that is all that matters.

BTW—at the end of each semester, I would ask for a show of hands as to how many of my students now consider themselves to be feminists. I’m happy to say every hand went up.

I am optimistic about the future. But maybe I'm just old and tired.

Sorry for the length of this post.

Tamara, I love that you managed to enlighten an entire class of college students every semester that they already held the beliefs of feminism and should embrace the label. I am also hopeful since we see every day that our fight for equality is not over and our young women need to step up and make their voices heard. And so many of them see the need to be active and are looking for ways to make the fourth wave more visible and effective.

Laurie wrote: "Tamara, I love that you managed to enlighten an entire class of college students every semester that they already held the beliefs of feminism and should embrace the label. I am also hopeful since ..."

Thank you, Laurie.

Tamara I also loved what you shared with us. It is unfortunate that some very brave women have had to share such painful, private experiences in order to really get things moving in the right direction but I also feel optimistic about the future as I witness the way that both men and women are embracing the current movement.

Liesl wrote: "Tamara I also loved what you shared with us. It is unfortunate that some very brave women have had to share such painful, private experiences in order to really get things moving in the right direc..."

Thank you, too, Liesl.
I'm gratified to see that both you and Laurie share my optimism and see us inching forward in the right direction.

tenzin wrote: "The title is so inviting. I want to read this."

Wonderful! Add your comments any time. This thread will remain open and we’d benefit from your insights.