Clean Romances discussion

Hi everyone!

I'm hoping to submit my book to a big reviewing site and I want to make the synopsis as attractive as possible. I'd really appreciate it if you could look at the two synopsis below and tell me which you like best???

1.
Flying from the cloistered atmosphere of a carefully watched upbringing, Adele is thrust into the adventure of her life.
Rafe, her companion through the dangerous web of intrigue she faces, has been promised to her since infancy. His reckless decision to conceal his identity from her may destroy all he holds dear. Or maybe in each other they will find the ally neither ever dreamed existed.

2.
Dear Reader
I wish to tell you a tale that began with a promise destined to change the lives of many.
When just a child Lady Adele of Berron lost her family during a dreadful battle and was betrothed to a stranger.
Lord Rafe of Valrek, only a child himself when the battle of Calis raged, grew to be a feared warrior and trusted advisor to his King. However sadness filled his past and Adele served only to remind him of all he had lost.
The promise that bound these two together caused great anger to some.
What, Dear Reader, happen in those days of treachery and darkness?
Incline your ear that I may whisper the secrets you so desire to hear...
Lady Quill

Thank you! ;-)

Number 1

number 1

Number 1.

Number 1. Definitely.

Thank you all so much for helping!

Number one seems to be winning hands down! ;-P

Definitely Number 1!

Number 1. Are you wanting to improve on it? Or just trying to decide between one or the other?

Annette wrote: "Number 1. Are you wanting to improve on it? Or just trying to decide between one or the other?"

I'm open to suggestions! ;-)

After looking at them both again, here are my thoughts. While I like the style of the first one a lot more, I think the second one does a better job of giving us the setting and a better sense of the premise of the book. The first one doesn't give any clues about when or where it takes place. So maybe combine the two? Cause all of this info:

"When just a child Lady Adele of Berron lost her family during a dreadful battle and was betrothed to a stranger.
Lord Rafe of Valrek, only a child himself when the battle of Calis raged, grew to be a feared warrior and trusted advisor to his King. However sadness filled his past and Adele served only to remind him of all he had lost. "

is really good. So, did the loss of her family cause the betrothal?

Annette wrote: "After looking at them both again, here are my thoughts. While I like the style of the first one a lot more, I think the second one does a better job of giving us the setting and a better sense of t..."

Yes, it did. I feel the same, the first Synopsis seems to draw the reader in more, but the second synopsis tells the reader what they can expect from the book...