The Humour Club discussion

Melki wrote: ""It doesn't fly.""

My fav. I imagined their full conversation:
"It doesn't fly."
"Did you plug it in?"
"Are you serious?"
"To your laptop. You have to charge it. And download the app."
"What's an app?"

“I need a thousand of these. I’m making matching skirts for my elephants.”

“I don’t need to know what you do with them, I just sell them!”

"How fast does it go?"

Rob wrote: "Melki wrote: ""It doesn't fly.""

My fav. I imagined their full conversation:
"It doesn't fly."
"Did you plug it in?"
"Are you serious?"
"To your laptop. You have to charge it. And download the app..."

I also imagine this conversation:

"It doesn't fly."
"Have you tried turning it off then on again?"

Because rebooting fixes everything!

"A monkey ate a poisoned date on this and now I don't dare to sleep on it. Can I exchange it for a new one?"

I swear - it really was used in an Indiana Jones movie!

No idiot! St Ives is in England.

These aren't the droids you're looking for.

"I'll trade you my servant and this dog for your big, thick stick."

"You don't know how to pack ultra-light?"

"You chaps are totally unprepared. Where are your 10 essentials?"

(Sorry--that one's probably only funny to my backpacking buddies).

No this isn't a beard! I like to keep my lint collection very close.

"That's right, this is a toll road, buddy! Put a sheckel in the hat and I won't sic Boris on you."

Joshua cocked his head back and grinned -- these two hoodlums would be the first to feel the heat of his new beard lasers.

Look, you've already got a stick, so why won't you trade the hat for my dog?

"Red! Red!"

There was a psychiatrist named Dr. Edison
Who counseled Dawn to get her fetish on
To use whips and chains
And saddles and reins
And give Edison a dose of his own medicine.

Giddy-Up! You nailed it Pseudo!

CartoonistAndre wrote: "Giddy-Up! You nailed it Pseudo!"

Thanks.

Strange but True: I wrote that limerick 2 weeks ago. I had run across the phrase "a dose of his own medicine" in something I was reading, and thought that it might make a funny punch line for a limerick. I didn't post it because I thought I might be a little too edgy. Then today, Melki posted this painting. It was like somebody sent my limerick to the painter as art specs--it even included the whips and reins.

But I suppose I shouldn't be surprised. The Dark Mistress knows all.

That is an amazing painting. As in, I can't believe they hung that up in some museum! What is it, Melki?

Because unlike the others where we've come up with racy commentary that might not be deserved, there is no way to misinterpret that one!

Seams the Sorcerers apprentice turned the tables.

Rebecca wrote: "That is an amazing painting. As in, I can't believe they hung that up in some museum! What is it, Melki?

Because unlike the others where we've come up with racy commentary that might not be deserv..."

Aristote et Campaspe (aka Phyllis Riding Aristotle) by Étienne Jeaurat (1699-1789). I can't find out much else about it other than this theme is often pictured by Renaissance artists to symbolize the power of women.

I can't resist a challenge, so I've spent a happy ten minutes Googling it.

Apparently. Campaspe (aka Phyllis) was one of Alexander the Great's mistresses. At the time, Aristotle was being tutored by Aristotle. Campaspe was annoyed when she heard Aristotle teaching Alexander to be wary of women. To get her revenge, she caused Aristotle to fall in love with her and to allow her to ride on his back like riding a horse. Alexander watches all this and decides to mistrust women and the power of love.

So all that Campaspe manages to do is to prove Aristotle's point. And doesn't it make it seem somehow more kinky to know that Alexander the Great is watching this scene? In fact, we are taking the point of view of Alexander as we watch.

Naturally, that's the official story, but the painter is also showing it to us as a bit of kinkery, complete with a flash of creamy white thigh.

The other story I found about Campaspe was that Alexander had the great painter Appelle paint her in the nude. The painting so impressed Alexander that he reasoned that Appelle must love Campaspe more than he did, so he kept the painting and gave Campaspe to the painter. As you do.

Campaspe/ Phyllis then came to be viewed as the archetypal mistress and a symbol of women's power over men. Which is something I didn't know ten minutes ago.

The ancient world had its versions of fifty shades. They only pretended that it was art.

Now I know why my son chose to study philosophy.

Thank you, Will! I wonder if they called her "Campy" for short?

Or if she just dressed that way.

That may be more than I wanted to know about Aristotle. And Alexander.

My God, are those stirrups?

CartoonistAndre wrote: "My God, are those stirrups?"

One should never underestimate the power of women's accessories.

Thanks Will for identifying the concupiscentnt characters, I'd wondered if it was that couple from Duck Dynasty.

CartoonistAndre wrote: "Thanks Will for identifying the concupiscentnt characters, I'd wondered if it was that couple from Duck Dynasty."

Cartoon, how often do you find yourself using the word "concupiscent"?

Only on Wednesdays, Rodney. Actually I found it on my Dictionary software where there's this cool app called These-r-us! Hey, just because I'm a cartoonist doesn't mean I can't use big words!

CartoonistAndre wrote: "... Hey, just because I'm a cartoonist doesn't mean I can't use big words!"

In which Pseudo thinks that he knows some words.
(Note that Pseudo wrote this several weeks ago,
but it seemed to fit here. I do not really suspect
Cartoon of friggin Rabelaisianism.)

You wrote a comment that is sesquipedalian?
Your obliquity is quite Brobdingnagian.
You have got to be mad.
Your rhyme and meter are bad.
And you are most certainly a friggin Rabelaisian.

____________________________
Glossary--per Random House Unabridged Dictionary
1. Sesquipedalian: Characterized by the use of long words (ses kwee pu day lee yun)
2. Obliquity: Mental perversity
3. Brobdingnagian: Gigantic (brob dee nay gee un)
4. Rabelaisian: a person who admires or emulates the works of the 16th century French humorist and satirist Rabelais. (rab u lay zee un)
5. Friggin: Mother Loving (ma dray hum peeng) adj., adv. Slang. (used as an intensifier).[1700–10 for earlier ger. sense; 1920–25 for current sense]

_______________________________

I recently heard Tom Cruise referred to as a homunculus - a representation of a small human being. If the tiny shoe fits...

Of those words, the only one I was familiar with was Brobdingnagian from Gulliver's Travels. I looked it up after it was used on the Big Bang Theory TV series.

Oh, I'm familiar with homunculus too. It was the familiar to one of my characters when I played D&D in my youth. (Dont judge me!)

For you, Rodney:

Neo couldn't shake this overriding feeling that someone was trying to tell him something.

It was the question that was keeping him awake at night. What was the matrix?

But should he take the blue pill, or the red one? Should he follow the white rabbit and see how far down the rabbit hole goes?

Or should he roll the dice again and hope it landed on something that would give him the opportunity to say "whoa!"

Oops! I only put that up in response to Rodney's comment, but, what the hell...let's roll with it!

Melki - I guess something is art if someone says it's art! I just assumed that you had transitioned from the old masters to modern art.

I want to know where I can buy that dice. LOL

Rodney

Just about any wish can be met on Amazon...

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Teenager-Make...

Not quite the same thing, Fortunatly 3D printing technology is getting cheaper. Maybe I can make my own. I may have to go outside to get a 3D printer though. Naw, it's too cold.

Pseudonymous wrote: "CartoonistAndre wrote: "..."

Pseudo! I thank you for saving me the need to google all those humungous (learnt that one in '68) words but wonder if you're calling me a friggin' Brobdingnagian, sesquipedalian,...rabble...rabyulay...type of person? I take umbrage!

CartoonistAndre wrote: "Pseudonymous wrote: "CartoonistAndre wrote: "..."

Pseudo! I thank you for saving me the need to google all those humungous (learnt that one in '68) words but wonder if you're calling me a friggin..."

As I said in my headnote, I do not suspect you of any sort of Rabelaisianism. To find out if there is anything Brobdinganian about you, you should ask your wife or other significant other.

As for your sesquipedalianist nature, who am I to call the crucible stygian?

Pseudonymous wrote: "who am I to call the crucible stygian?"

Nice!

Alright then, I'll retract the umbrage, ask my wife whether there's anything brobdinganian about me (one can only hope!) and see whether I have any connection to the river Styx in my ancestry.

OK, she said; "Dream-on. Now get your brob-ding-dang-donian bupkis off the computer and get those dishes done.