Play Book Tag discussion

This is How It Always Is is a beautifully written book about an interesting family with five children, and how they deal with the emerging reality that five year old Claude really wants to be a girl. The mothers is a doctor and the father is a writer and stay-at-home dad. The kids are interesting and sometimes funny. I really enjoyed reading about this family, and I cared about what happened to them.

The book has many moments filled with joy, humor, wonder and love. It also deals with rejection, sadness, fear, and uncertainty. Puberty can be difficult for most people, but it could be terrifying for transgender kids. The mother sees first hand the violence done to a transgender person in the hospital emergency room.

The author also has a transgender child, but she says that this is not her family's story. Nonetheless, it is clear that she had an understanding of the range of issues a family with a transgender child might face. While she addressed most issues, she didn't go into any depth on issues (such as surgery) relevant to older teenagers or adults. I think it's important to note that the experiences of each transgender child or family will be different, just as all families are different in some ways. There are no easy answers, and there is no prescription or list of must-do steps.

I highly recommend this book for face-to-face bookclubs. In my group it brought up many interesting opinions and experiences. Some thought the story made it all look too easy, and others thought the challenges were extreme. Some loved the trip to Thailand and the Buddist ideas, others didn't. There were many different thoughts regarding the decision to try to keep it secret after they moved to a new town. I think everyone agreed that the book was definitely worth reading.

Ah drat - I meant to put this on my top ten list for the year. I really enjoyed it.

KateNZ wrote: "Ah drat - I meant to put this on my top ten list for the year. I really enjoyed it."

I don't know yet if it will make my top ten list. In another year it would have, but I read 130+ books this year so it will be hard. I have to get caught up on my reviews first.

My book club read this one as swell and I totally agree that it sparked a great discussion!

I loved this one so much! Great review, Nancy.

I really enjoyed this one too. I think it made my 2018 list?

I'm glad to see that the book has found so many readers. For me, it was my first introduction to being trans and the whole issue of gender identity.

I'm glad you all liked it too.

I was at a party tonight and I met a Kindergarten teacher who reads. So of course, this is the book I had to mention first. She put it right in her phone. It's so much nicer to talk about books at parties rather than politics.

It’s one of my favourite aspects of reading Nancy, being able to share.