Terminalcoffee discussion

I could have sworn we talked about this, but I searched and I can't find the thread, if we did. I saw this advertisement on GR and I was reminded of how fucked up this whole "the elf is watching you" thing is.

http://www.amazon.com/Elf-Shelf-Chris...

Fuck that shit.

This thing freaks me out. When we sold them at Borders, people went CRAZY over them. I hate them.

Wait, the Amazon link doesn't tell you as much as the Wikipedia entry:

Every day from Thanksgiving until Christmas Eve, each family's scout elf watches over the children and then at night, once everyone goes to bed, the elf flies back to the North Pole to report back to Santa about what activities, good and bad, took place throughout the day. Before the family wakes up each morning, the scout elf flies back from the North Pole and hides. By hiding in a new spot each morning around the house, the scout elf and the family play an on-going game of hide and seek. The Elf on the Shelf explains that elves get their magic by being named. In the back of each book, families have an opportunity to write their elf's name and the date that they adopted it. Once the elf is named, the scout elf receives its special Christmas magic which allows it to fly to and from the North Pole. However, the magic might go if touched, so the rule for The Elf on the Shelf states: "There's only one rule that you have to follow so I will come back and be here tomorrow: Please do not touch me. My magic might go, and Santa won't hear all I've seen or I know." Although families aren't supposed to touch their scout elf, they can talk to it and tell it all their Christmas wishes so it can report back to Santa accurately.

So in other words the elf is supposed to keep kids from being bad lest the elf rat on them. Fuck that shit.

This is the first I've heard of it. Sounds kind of dumb.

I’ve never heard of this. I find it’s sufficient to threaten all the wee ones in my life with: “Santa’s watching you!”.

I scared the bejeezus out of my daughter badly enough by telling her the man in the moon was watching out for her at night time. She didn’t sleep in her own bed for weeks. Nah, we don’t need an elf.

Right. Santa knows. What's the point of having someone else duplicating Santa's oversight? Oh, selling shit is the point. Now I see.

A marketing ploy

That is too weird.

Ok, I just read Amazon user rave reviews and it sounds nice:
"Santa sends the elf to watch the children and then the elf reports to Santa every night and comes back to a different spot in the house. My kids wake up with a running start to see who can find the elf first. The kids must name the elf and they really enjoyed that as well. It is such a nice tradition to help make the Christmas Season even more fun and special. I know it will be with our family for a very long time.".

Fuck that Amazon shit. I suppose it's all how you use the elf, but when I read parents do the "oooh...the elf is watching you and will report back to Santa" I want to set the elf on fire.

::backs away slowly::

You are kind of elf-like, Sallers...

And I like wine.

RandomAnthony wrote: "Fuck that Amazon shit. I suppose it's all how you use the elf, but when I read parents do the "oooh...the elf is watching you and will report back to Santa" I want to set the elf on fire."

I support you in this.

Sally wrote: "And I like wine."

My wife supports you in this.

RandomAnthony wrote: "Fuck that Amazon shit. I suppose it's all how you use the elf, but when I read parents do the "oooh...the elf is watching you and will report back to Santa" I want to set the elf on fire."

Plus the elf looks like a bad piece of '70s decor.

I am more scared of the elf than my kids are.

Chuckie the elf.

Why all the fuss?

Nicely put, Catherine.


I'd like to know which TCer not only uses the elf-on-the-shelf but also co-sleeps.

Catherine wrote: "We use it every year during Christmas because that's our tradition since our firstborn. That's the only thing we use as far as 'scaring' our children into behaving better. Others don't use it and ..."

I can accept this. Like I said, it's all in how you use the elf. If you're terrorizing your kids with the elf, that's one thing...if it's just part of your family fun, that's another.

If there is a polar opposite of co-sleeping that's what I do. Our bed is so taboo that when we let the kids in to watch TV with us they act like it's the greatest, most comfortable bed in the word even though it's actually old and all caved in on my husband's side.

I have trouble with the whole entire Santa thing for some reason. I hardly say a word about Santa. But I don't have to because TV tells them everything they're supposed to know about it anyway. My kids are still little enough to believe so we definitely do presents from Santa on Christmas morning but if I talk it up too much I feel like a big fat liar. I have issues. I already know. Keep your letters.

Huh. I don't even plan on buying presents yet. I never thought about a santa plan, per se, but it seems like her grandparents are "santa" enough.

You've got time Sally.

The Santa Plan. One of the key stressors of raising kids. When my girls were small, I was in favor of minimizing the whole "Santa's watching" crappydoo. The mother of the children saw it otherwise. We argued about it a lot. I always lost.

"The Elf on the Shelf" sounds like code for something perverted.

Heh. It could be a bar pick-up line, Gretchen. "Hey, baby, after I buy you a drink, how about we go back to your place and put the elf on the shelf?"

If you ever hear this in a bar, you'll know it's RA now.

I'm also not that down with the "Santa's watching" crap. I'm not that into Santa as a being. As a kid obviously I loved Christmas, loved presents, all the rituals, but I didn't really give two shits about "Santa." I think it was because as a child you only have so much room in your cosmology for omniscient, omnipotent beings, and God was the main one in our house. Santa always seemed like a graven idol. I didn't quite understand how the secular Santa story, and the religious Jesus story, were supposed to fit together.

I grew up in a mostly secular house and we had "Santa presents", but all that meant was that you got something totally kickass on Christmas morning (my very, very favorite being a Smurfmobile pedal car when I was maybe 5?) and a stocking full of candy. We didn't get threatened with Santa or being put on a naughty list...

As an aside, I hate how candy canes have been turned upside down and repurposed as Jesus Sticks... the red symbolizes his blood!! Ugh.

What?? I didn't know they did that to candy canes!

http://media-cdn.pinterest.com/upload...

Gag.

As an aside, I hate how candy canes have been turned upside down and repurposed as Jesus Sticks... the red symbolizes his blood!! Ugh.

Weird. Candy blood?

Also, "Jesus stick" sounds dirty.

Santa comes to our house, you betcha! My son will be nine in January and just about has the Santa thing figured out. We've had many talks about the other omniscient spy and he understands how that concept can be comforting for people. It's only a matter of time.

A little Santa history
http://www.thecoca-colacompany.com/he...

After the New Year, you could probably set him in your front yard as a friend to your lawn gnome. If you have one...

Ha!

Did anyone see the Elf on the Shelf tv show?

Two of my facebook friends who have kids posted pictures of their "elf shenanigans" beginning at their homes.

I had never heard of the Elf on the Shelf until about two years ago. Cute idea for kids, something like a mobile advent calendar.

I have a niece whose son hid the Elf because he didn't want it watching him at night.