Terminalcoffee discussion

What major changes/transitions (moving, new job, new professions, starting/ending relationships) have you encountered in your life, and how did you benefit/survive them?

My biggest transition by far was moving from Chicago to a small town in Wisconsin. There were so many small cultural rules I didn't understand and I took a couple weeks (and a speeding ticket) to adjust to a speed limit of 25MPH. Everybody here went hunting and when they said "downtown" they meant downtown in the small town. My wife and I romanticized the whole "living in a small town" thing, and the hardest part for me was seeing people I knew everywhere. I remember going to the bank and the teller saying "you're going to be the new reading specialist, right? I hear you were here already." At first that was cool, I thought, but then it drove me a bit nuts. I missed my friends but after a while Wisconsin began to feel like home, I figured out the backroads, and after four years I got a job out of town so I escaped some of the insular town patterns.

I'm glad I moved here from Chicago. I'm not sure I would have ever grown up had I stayed in the same city and the same neighborhood like so many of my friends. Growth, it seems, is the biggest benefit of transitions.

Comments?

See, I'm kind of the opposite, I much prefer living in a big city... and I mean IN it, not in some suburb like I made the mistake of moving to within the past couple of years.

I kinda feel like I'm stifled from not having instant access to big city resources.

But then... no kids, no marriage (or hetero-civil union, for that matter), just dogs, so being in the city isn't as hard for me because I don't have to worry about anyone else. ;)

I'm the same way, Gary. Not that Austin is big, but still--I don't think I could handle the burbs. And If I ever do have kids I'd want them to grow up in the city, too. I think being raised in an urban environment gives you an outlook you don't give from the suburbs. More diversity.

As for transitions, I don't think I've stopped to really think about how I deal with them, I just do. In the last 15 years, the longest I've ever stayed in one spot is just under two years. I've got packing/moving down to a science. I am the opposite of a pack rat. I get rid of shit if I like just so I don't have to store it/move it.
If I think on it too hard, it'll bum me out. I dare to dream of the day when I no longer have a neighbor above, below, to the left, and to the right of me. On the other hand, no property taxes, no mortgage, and no maintenance cost aren't so bad.

I'm a lot like Shelly- one of my absolute favorite things to is just pack up and move to a new place. I start to get itchy if I stay in one town too long. In fact, we're getting ready to leave Tucson in a couple months and relocate to bright and sunny rainy and overcast Portland. I love it. I love a new city, finding new pubs, cafes and restaurants. I love figuring out a new mass transit system. I love feeling out new friendships and adjusting to each cities unique flavor. Most of all, I like packing because it means I can throw away so much crap that accumulates without you even noticing. Except the books. I never get rid of the books.

I guess I am too much of a home body for that. That is why I travel, to have new experiences, as I am one of those that doesn't like to relax when on vacation, as there is so much to see and do, if I want to sit around I can do that at home. But to constantly be moving as a lifestyle is a new concept to me. Good for you though it does sound interesting.

What the . . . ?

Félix wrote: "What the . . . ?"

Huh?

What? Huh?

I don't understand why this thread popped back up without any activity since Nov 2008.

My husband get's worried about big transitions - because he's married to ME - and I'm not very good at it!

I get worried, and I think too much about stuff and it affects me physically (I can't sleep, get nervous etc) - especially after we had our kids. I actually cope really well with the practical elements, but somehow my bind has to bend into a new shape, and that's hard.

I felt it when my husband and I moved in together (the first and only boyfriend I've ever lived with), when we bought our house (maintenance! Argh, bank loan ARRGH) and when we had our kids + when I had to send my daughter to daycare after 1 year of maternity leave.

We moved around quite a lot when I was younger, and while I think it's very healthy to try living in different places, we're aiming at letting our kids complete their elemental school in ONE school - not 4 like I did :-)

I have a new job. My old boss called me and told me they needed a clinic manager and asked me to consider a return. My answer was kind of a no-brainer for me. I love working with people and missed working in addictions research. I've been busy nesting and getting back into that groove. I'm very happy.

Oh, and I have big plans for grad school in the fall - I plan to become a licensed social worker.

Congratulations, Heidi! Sounds exciting. New frontiers!

Excellent Heidi, wishing you nothing but the best on both endeavors.

Thanks, Larry. :)

Thanks, Jim and TawNub! :)

New Job Heidi, and grad school Heidi! Multi-faceted woman.

Heidi, that's wonderful!

Thanks, Cynthia and Jammies! I've said it once already and can't say it enough - I'm happy.

Oh come on, say it again.

I just quit my job to start grad school next month . . . in a year I'll be a licensed paralegal in Ontario - just in time for my husband to lose his job (he is an HR manager and his plant is closing in September 2013). It'll be a fun year!

Wow, tough transition, Jennifer. I wish you best with all of that.

Good luck Jennifer and Mr. Jennifer.

Hmmm, well, I've always been one to just decide something and jump feet first. After graduation I got on a plane and flew to Lubbock, TX to to go AIM (Adventures in Missions http://www.aimsunset.org/) where I knew no one. I wanted to go to Thailand to work in an orphanage and I heard about the program in June...class started in August. Thailand fell through, so I moved to England the following April with 5 other kids my age. What an adventure, literally! It wasn't as stuffy as you're thinking either. I taught my "coordinator" (the existing missionary you go to work for) how to do tequila shots. We didn't get drunk or anything, but they aren't all repressed about stuff like that. It was brilliant, and hard work. I didn't even think about the transition though, I'm not sure I ever have. After England I moved to NY for a year, back to Lubbock for a year, Dallas for 3 years, home to Portland for a couple of years, back to Dallas for another year, back to England for 3 more...My life has been in a constant state of transition since age 9 and never really stopped until a few years ago when I married my Larry. Now I'm home. We might move one day, buy a different house, travel...doesn't matter. I'm home with him, that security is what matters to me. The rest is all just new experiences, the spice of life!