Truth in Nonfiction discussion

Choose one story (I Pledge Alliance to the Bag – I’ll Eat What He’s Wearing) and create an epigraph that could be inserted at the beginning to reflect on a theme, message, discovery, etc. Your epigraph could be line(s) from literature or even song lyrics, it’s up to you. Explain why your epigraph fits the story and be sure to use at least two quotes from the text to support your claim.

“She shaped the words in her mind, tried them out, then couldn’t get them past her lips. Why was that? The embarrassment, was it, the fear that people might hear?... It was not only that.”
- Alice Munro, taken from “Wild Swans” in the Norton Anthology of Contemporary Fiction 2nd Edition

This quote I chose for my epigraph, in short, uncovers the thoughts of a girl, Rose, who is being sexually molested by a man on a train. Munro’s words relate to the theme in “Picka Pocketoni” when a couple is making rude, ghastly comments about Sedaris on the Paris Metro. When the ignorant couple insults Sedaris’s personal hygiene and calls him “froggy,” Sedaris just stands there; he says, “It occurred to me to say something, but I thought it might be better to wait and see what he came up with next... So I kept my mouth shut and stared off into space” (223-224). Rose even claims, “But there was more to it than that. Curiosity... A lust in itself that will make you draw back and wait, wait too long, risk almost anything just to see what will happen” (409). Rose and David both find themselves waiting silently and passively to see where things will go out of wonder. Sedaris also notes that it may have been embarrassing for all of them if he spoke up so he pretends that he doesn’t know what they’re talking about. But, like Rose, he finds that his reluctance to speak up isn’t completely due to the embarrassment. Sedaris says, “I like being thought of as cunning and professional... at least for the next few seconds, I still had the opportunity to be somebody different, somebody quick and dangerous” (225, 227). Sedaris continues to grapple with his identity at the end of “Deux,” which is considerably evident in “The Late Show,” and he enjoys how other people perceive him as someone who he never thought he was, like a French thief; Rose likes that she was a man’s “object,” even if only for a short time. Playing pretend can be exciting, but what does one do if they have no identity to return to that they call “home?”

"America is my country and Paris is my hometown." -Gertrude Stein

This quote is a fitting epigraph for Sedaris' "I Pledge Allegiance to the Bag", an essay which draws cultural viewpoints from both America and France. While living in Paris, Sedaris learns that the French have a certain image of all Americans. He writes, "Europeans expected me to regularly wash my hands with prepackaged towelettes and to automatically reject all unpasteurized dairy products" (212). When Sedaris returns to America for a five week trip, he observes Americans in the airport who fit the stereotypes that the French have assumed. He finds positivity among the negative stereotypes (i.e. talking about money) of Americans. Sedaris says, "Standing in long lines, I could easily see how we earned our reputation as a friendly and talkative people. Conversations tended to revolve around the incompetence of the person standing behind the cash register or computer terminal, but even when pressed for time, I found most travelers to be tolerant and good-natured, much more willing to laugh than to cause a stink" (213). Although Sedaris, like Stein, has settled into and enjoyed a new lifestyle in Paris, he continues to view America as what he has always known it to be.

"What if my idea of happiness doesn't coincide with yours?" -Kurt Vonnegut, "Welcome to the Monkey House"

This epigraph would be for "I'll Eat What He's Wearing," the story of Sedaris's father's strange eating habits. Throughout the stories that we have read, it is safe to say that Lou lives in a world of his own and doesn't care what anyone thinks. Because of that, Vonnegut's quote matches Lou well. "There are those who attribute [Lou's] hoarding to being raised during the Depression..." (266) which is something to take note of. Since he had a rough upbringing and a large family, being frugal and saving everything came naturally to him. It has just gotten to an extreme sense of saving that it doesn't matter if he saves spoiled food. Living in the Depression era probably taught him to be grateful for any sliver of food that was given to him, no matter what it was. In Lou's words, "there was nothing so rotten that it couldn't be eaten. It was people who were spoiled, not food" (267). To relate Vonnegut's words to Lou's philosophy, what may seem taboo to the average person might be an everyday thing to another. Like happiness, daily customs are not the same for everyone and as long as it gets people by, it shouldn't be considered negative. Even if it does turn off Sedaris and his siblings.

"I love those unexpected moments that settle into your heart as significant — the ones that nestle like bookmarks into the very best folds of time. I remember so many of them:" - Willow Bird Baking: Lessons in life and Kitchen Confidence.

I'm kind of cheating here, but I remembered this quote from a blog I sometimes read and it reminded me of Sedaris's work as a whole. I don't think that his essays have the sense of sappy nostalgia that this quote has; however, the work is a collection of moments from his life that have stuck out despite the fact that they often seem obscure to the reader. He recalls such specific moments in his life and connects them to some of the overarching themes of his life. I'm thinking more to the beginning of the collection here. Essays like City of Angles or Big Boy where day-to-day events illuminate something greater in Sedaris's life. Entertaining stories, that seem to have no significance or connection, suddenly become windows into Sedaris's truest self.

"An identity would seem to be arrived at by the way in which the person faces and uses his experience." -James Baldwin

I like this quotation for "Picka Pocketoni" for a couple of reasons. Sedaris is standing in the metro in France with Hugh, and is observing the large fluctuation of people. When the American couple start talking about and insulting him in front of his face, he remains quiet, observant, and seemingly oblivious. Instead of taking the conclusions that Martin jumped to in a negative light, Sedaris just took the comments to his head and defended himself silently and to himself. "Because they had used the tiresome word froggy and complained about my odor, I was now licensed to hate this couples much as I wanted...Unleashed by their insults, I was now free to criticize Martin's clothing" (222). It didn't seem like Sedaris took this personally, but instead derived hate for the couple from it. "...but and American in Paris will find no harsher critic than another American. France isn't even my country, but there I was, deciding that these people needed to be sent home, preferably in chains" (222). Sedaris doesn't confront the couple about the instance, but continues to coast on the dislike that they opened him to. Sedaris, being pretty much as far as you can get from being a French man (resorting solely to watching American films in France), is being mistaken for one by a couple of his own countrymen. Instead of standing up for himself verbally, he does so mentally, maybe alluding to the fact that he did like to be mistaken for a French man, despite the light of the situation. "...Hugh and I stepped out of the car, no longer finicky little boyfriends on their overseas experiment, but rogues, accomplices, halfway to Timbuktu" (227). It seems as though a large part of the book so far is made up of Sedaris' thoughts, and imaginary occurrences. For some reason I think that Sedaris may have liked the experience with the American couple because it did provide a different persona for Sedaris outside of his imagination.

"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler." -Henry David Thoreau

This quote reminded me of, "See You Again Yesterday," through one particular passage that I noted in where Sedaris says, "My understanding was that it completed a person, sanding down the rough provincial edges and transforming you into a citizen of the world"(155). I feel like Sedaris was constantly running into this conflict between escaping the reality of America while simultaneously living in a different country.

"Take what you can use and let the rest go by."-Ken Kesey, author of The Electric Cool Acid Test

If this doesn't fit the chapter, Picka Pocketoni, then what does? Sedaris is stuck on a train with some obnoxious American tourists, who think he is a pick pocket. Does Sedaris lash out, or use his wit to bring them down a few notches, no instead he waits and ponders, taking the entire meeting to thought. He TAKES what he can use and lets the situation go. He could have lashed out, but instead he takes it all in, just as Kesey says to. Sedaris lets it go, only to be left with a hilarious story that not only makes people laugh, but also sheds light on some of the problems with Americans these days. Taking the good, leaving the bad, coming out on top. I know this question is meant for just these last chapters, but I believe this qoute would make a fitting epigraph for the collection of stories. Sedaris takes from life what he can use for his stories, and honestly lets the other "stuff" go by. Sometimes the "stuff" he takes from life may seem meaningless, but in reality it's that stuff that makes up his life and allows him to write these stories. So he takes what he can use and lets the rest go by.

Fun prompt--can't wait to see all the responses.

“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself” George B. Shaw.
Okay, I took the sappy route but I’m not sorry about it. I had to use this quote because I loved “The Late Show” so much and it describes this essay so well. Everyone does what Sedaris does in this chapter to a certain extent, but I love the details he uses to describe his different alter egos. For example when he says, “I cure paralysis because I’m tired of watching skateboarders race down the wheelchair ramps, and I cure muscular dystrophy just to get rid of the Jerry Lewis telethon. I eradicate mental retardation so no one will ever again have an excuse to make a movie based upon an old television series, and I cure diabetes, herpes, and Parkinson’s disease as personal favors to some of my favorite celebrities” (252-253) he still uses that Sedaris humor to intertwine elements of his own character into someone who seems completely unlike him. The funny thing is, is that with each alter ego, Sedaris already has some of the qualities each character possesses. He even recognizes the “common themes” (263) between these characters himself. Throughout the entire collection of essays, Sedaris has been creating and trying out a variety of different personas based on who he thinks he is, who others think he is, and who he wants to be. He seems to know who everyone else is, but not necessarily himself. As we discussed, as indicated by the title of the collection, he doesn’t ever really get there. Even though he doesn’t find a definitive solution, we get to follow his journey in trying to create it rather than find it.

"Everyone is a genius at least once a year. The real geniuses simply have their bright ideas closer together." -Georg C. Lichtenberg

I think that this would be an appropriate epigraph for "Smart Guy" because it takes a humorous stance on intelligence, just as Sedaris has done. Towards the end of the essay, it is obvious that Sedaris is a little bit hurt and shocked by his IQ score: "It turns out that I'm really stupid, practically an idiot. There are cats that weigh more than my IQ score. Were my number translated into dollars, it would buy you about three buckets of fried chicken" (246). This was such a hilarious way of explaining his score, which I feel like helped Sedaris lessen the burden of being so "stupid." Sedaris has also mentioned the many "great" ideas that he has had in his lifetime, like the sunscreened chewing gum and the mayonnaise instead of bug spray. I think that the epigraph I chose can show how we all have our own ideas of genius and how we are all capable of great ideas at some point - it just depends on when these ideas happen to take place that tends to label our level of intelligence.

"One man's junk is another man's treasure" - Unknown

The last essay of this collection, "I'll Eat What He's Wearing", I think this quote fits perfectly with. And actually while reading this essay I felt like I could totally relate. My father is a huge fan of antiques and it never surprises me to find him picking through dumsters and rummaging around at garage sales for that perfect ancient find. A quote that I was raised up hearing from him was this one, "One man's junk is another man's treasure". So now relating this back to Sedaris, I think this quote fits in perfectly with David's father as well. Mr. Sedaris is a man, who like my father, collects and saves "things". Sedaris quotes, "For as long as I can remember, my father has saved. He saves money, he saves disfigured sticks that resemble disfigured celebritites, and, most of all, he saves food" (266). David's father is a man who does not see food as junk or as waste, he takes whatever he can and saves/eats it...no matter how old or moldy it may be. "You wouldn't catch our neighbors scraping mold off their strawberries, but to our father, there was nothing so rotten that it couldn't be eaten. It was people who were spoiled, not food" (267), Sedaris states. Although Mr. Sedaris's habit does seem a little odd and unusual, David is not afraid to reveal this to his readers, as it gives us an accurate depiciton of who his father actually is. In Mr.Sedaris's eyes he did not view old food as junk or bad, but instead he wanted to savor and save every little parcel of food until it could no longer be used. Like my father, David's father, found treasures out of any other man's considered "junk". Odd as they may seem, somehow we still love them. Just as they love their treasures.

“Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.” – Martin Luther King, Jr.

As I read “Picka Pocketoni”, I was amazed by the ignorance being displayed. I found this story to be comical, as well as indicative of our culture and society. When I was traveling in Paris with my family, I could pick up on pieces of native conversations, while the rest of my family would make English remarks, subconsciously thinking that they were the only ones who knew the English language. What their conversations consisted of were nowhere near as offensive as Martin’s comments, yet I still felt the need to remind them of the facts, to stray them from the ignorant stereotype of Americans. In Sedaris’ telling of the story, I was constantly waiting for him to lash out against Martin’s stupidity and rude comments. I was surprised when the story concluded with him simply walking out of the Metro car under two identities: one the pocket picking thief, and the other an American who appeared to be Parisian. I liked how Sedaris used this story to also show the differences between cultures while displaying the “ignorance and conscientious stupidity” of the American man, Martin, as he believes he is in the presence of an inferior group of foreigners.

"Every human being has hundreds of separate people living under his skin." -Mel Brooks

I think this quote is quite explanatory, speaking of the multiple identities Sedaris creates for himself throughout the book. In Picka Pocketoni, Sedaris is "no longer a finicky little boyfriend on an overseas experiment, but a rogue, accomplice, halfway to Timbuktu." (227) Before, we have seen him as a guitarist, Mr. Sedaris, an artist, a failing artist, a French student, and now this. The reoccurring theme that he is uncomfortable with his sexuality goes along with this. On the subway, he allows the couple to classify him, because he finds it interesting to be thought of as something completely different from what he actually is. I think this quote greatly describes how Sedaris encourages the various different identities he creates for himself rather than denying them. He embraces every separate self, and lets the "dangerous me" prevail for however long it may last.

"Speak French when you can't think of the English for a thing--turn your toes out when you walk--and remember who you are!" - The Red Queen, Through the Looking Glass by Lewis Carroll

This curious (haha) quote immediately stood out to me after reading "I Pledge Allegiance to the Bag". In "Through the Looking Glass", Alice is being instructed in the art of being a chess pawn by the Red Queen, who in no uncertain terms is telling her how to move "en passant" (there is no English term for this ploy). "Turning your toes out when you walk" is a reference to how pawns capture other pieces in chess by moving diagonally left or right. The game of chess (incidentally known as the Game of Kings) is wonderfully strategic and based in politics, which brought to mind Sedaris' references to the French view of American government and how he ends up representing "America itself, all fifty states and Puerto Rico sitting at the table with gravy on my chin" (212).

I also drew similarities between Sedaris and Alice in that both are being used as "pawns", in that they hardly have any autonomy and are generally controlled by more valuable pieces/people. Sedaris describes on page 212 how he was "expected to look and behave in a certain way...where did people get these ideas, and how valid are they?" His struggles with maintaining his unique identity in a sea of American who all seem to be "a friendly and talkative people" (213) reminded me of the third part of my selected epigraph, in which the Red Queen instructs Alice to "remember who you are!" That is perhaps the most profound statement in all of Lewis Carroll's works, and Sedaris is clearly feeling like a fish out of water in France, "being made to feel guilty for requesting a service an expensive hotel is generally expected to perform" (215).

"Humanity i love you because you
are perpetually putting the secret of
life in your pants and forgetting
it’s there and sitting down

on it
and because you are
forever making poems in the lap
of death Humanity

i hate you"
e.e. cummings

This is from the end of the poem "Humanity I Love You" by e.e. cummings. I would use this section as an epigraph to "I Almost Saw This Girl Get Killed". This was definitely my favorite story from this section, and probably one of my favorites from the book overall. I think Cummings speaks to the inherent ridiculousness and confusion of humanity, which is what Sedaris seems to be examining specifically in "I Almost Saw This Girl Get Killed" (and indeed throughout the whole of MTPOD). He talks about the weird human urge to ogle at a catastrophe, and recount events as juicy gossip that are actually tragedies, and mulls over how this reflects on those doing the ogling: "even worse, she had been forced to watch us. Squinting down at our hideous, expectant faces, she probably saw no reason to return to earth and reclaim her life among scumbags like us" (238). Sedaris also touches on other absurdities of society, such as as the vachette games; who comes up with such a ridiculous idea for a sport? Who volunteers to put themselves in harms way like that? Who can find excitement in someone else's brush with death? Almost everyone. Throughout this section Sedaris reflects on the oddities in society and bizarreness of life, and muses as to what creates this in us. Cummings' poem holds similar absurdities when it talks about humanity sitting down on the secret of life, and ends on a note that is perhaps more cynical ("Humanity I hate you") than Sedaris is, but is nonetheless similarly dubious.