C. Rae D'Arc's Blog, page 4

I have an addiction, and I never want to give it up. Thankfully, it’s to Music. I mentioned on my About page and Behind the Scenes of “Don’t Date the Haunted,” Bonus Soundtrack some of the music that I like. In summary: basically anything that moves me–whether with a strong beat, swaying strings, or thoughtful lyrics.

While writing “Don’t Dance with Death,” I created an iTunes playlist that I called “Haunted Classical.” On this playlist, I had soundtracks like Hans Zimmer’s “Inception,” classics like “Toccata and Fugue in D Minor,” by Johann Bach, and even Apocalyptica’s “Inquisition Symphony” album.

Starts sneaky, then at 59 seconds goes into chase mode. At 1:41, run for your life. 4:23, you’re cornered…you decide whether the ending’s a scramble for your life or death.

When editing “Don’t Dance with Death,” I began with Adam Young’s “Omaha Beach,” but after using that album to edit a lot of “Don’t Marry the Cursed,” I needed something fresh. I started with a YouTube Music Radio shuffle based on Audiomachine, and that was how I found their “Cinematix” album. The whole album was perfect for setting my tone and mood for writing about Horror.

My favorites are The Last Tornado, Burning Skies, Intruders at the Gate, and Time to Save the World

It was so perfectly haunting that we used it as background music for our D&D sessions based on Van Richten’s Guide to Ravenloft.

After listening to it over a dozen times, I sometimes switched back to radios based on Audiomachine, Thomas Bergersen, or Colossal Trailer Music. “Cinematix” was my baseline though.

However, if “Don’t Dance with Death” has a single theme song, it’s “Danse Macabre,” by Saint-Saens (I mean, come on, it’s perfect. It’s lots of fun to play on the harp, weaving paper through the strings as we slap them to make sounds of bones dancing).
A runner up is “Warrior’s Song,” by Audiomachine.

The whimsical minor tones are perfect for the male perspectives of the book. “Warrior’s Song” is more appropriate for Pansy and Abadda’s mindsets.Character Theme Songs

“Don’t Dance with Death” has a lot of viewpoints (more than I originally planned). All of these songs are selected for THIS book specifically, which is why Pansy and Theo share a song that’s very different from their songs listed in the “Don’t Date the Haunted” soundtrack.

Since it’s a new list of different songs, I’ve made a new playlist for you to easily look up/listen.

Pansy + Theo’s theme song for “Don’t Dance with Death”

Pansy + Theo:
Just Give me a Reason, by P!nk and FUN
Runner up:
Like I’m Gonna Lose You, by Meghan Trainor and John Legend

Pansy:
Alive, by Daughtry
Runner ups:
Wolf Bite, by Owl City (this song had extra meaning with the alternative ending)
Monster, by Imagine Dragons (I know it’s included in the first soundtrack, but it’s still applicable)
Fire, by The Score

Theo:
Heavy is the Crown, by Daughtry
Runner up:
Funny, by Rob Thomas
You Are the Reason, by Calum Scott

Aeron’s theme song

Aeron:
Angels, by Owl City
Runner ups:
Gone too Soon, by Daughtry
Plant Life, by Owl City (the line “I saw a bear in the den/reading my textbooks again” was actually my inspiration for Master Bahr’s character.)

Dunstan:
Renegades, by X Ambassadors
Runner Ups:
Shadow Days, by John Mayer

Berwyna:
Breakaway, by Kelly Clarkson
Runner up:
Rise Up, by Imagine Dragons

Oz:
Follow You, by Imagine Dragons
Runner up:
Comeback, by The Score

Abadda:
Stronger, by The Score
Runner up:
Supremacy, by Muse

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Way back when I was still planning to publish “Don’t Date the Haunted,” I thought it would be fun to make a personality quiz that would help explore and define where fans would live in Novel.

I looked high and low for a quiz site that would accept this particular style of quiz, but even a coder said this would be super complicated to code.

There are only 15 questions, but some responses have multiple answers, so it’s helpful to keep track. Here’s a little template to help:

ChildrenTally Marks: FantasyHorrorMysteryRomanceSci-FiThrillerWestern

When I go to the library or book store, I gravitate MOST toward these novels:

ChildrenFantasyHorrorMysteryRomanceSci-FiThrillerWestern

My favorite movies are MOST often:

ChildrenFantasyHorrorMysteryRomanceSci-FiThrillerWestern

Alright, those answers were pretty obvious which lands they referred to. For the next questions, pick your answer then highlight the >(space)< to know which lands to tally.

My life is a(n):

Learning Opportunity >(Children)<Adventure >(Fantasy)<Haunting >(Horror)<Mystery Case >(Mystery)<Romance >(do you really need me to tell you which land to tally?)<Experiment >(Sci-Fi)<Thrill >(Thriller)<Round-Up >(Western)<

Be honest with yourself, if you could skip ahead in a story, you’d skip to the…

Resolution >(Children)<Magical scenes >(Fantasy)<Scary/gory scenes >(Horror)<Twist reveal >(Mystery)<Romantic scenes >(Romance)<Technological scenes >(Sci-Fi)<Action scenes >(Thriller)<Description paragraphs >(Western)<

Magic is:

Not real >(Romance, Horror, Western, Thriller)<Awesome! >(Fantasy, Children)<A tool >(Sci-Fi, Mystery)<

When I fall in love:

I take time to sort out my feelings >(Horror, Mystery, Sci-Fi, Thriller)<I fall faster than the rain >(Children, Fantasy, Romance, Western)<

In a significant other, I’m MOST attracted to:

Looks >(Romance, Western)<Smarts >(Horror, Mystery, Sci-Fi)<Talents >(Fantasy, Thriller)<

True or False:  I don’t mind getting scared

True, I find little scares natural and interesting >(Fantasy, Horror, Mystery, Sci-Fi, Thriller)<False! Don’t scare me! >(Children, Romance, Western)<

What would be your dream job?

Just doing what I’m good at >(Horror, Thriller)<Parenting >(Children, Parenting)<Something that requires my intellect >(Mystery, Sci-Fi)<Something that takes me places >(Fantasy, Western)<

Where would your ideal home be?

Near the center of the biggest city around >(Mystery, Sci-Fi, Thriller)<Rural, with lots of space to explore >(Fantasy, Romance, Western)<Suburbs are the perfect fit >(Children, Horror)<

I prefer stories:

About real life >(Thriller, Mystery, Western)<With just a flair of magic >(Horror, Romance)<The more imaginative, the better! >(Fantasy, Children’s, Sci-fi)<

My ideal pet would be a:

Dragon >(Fantasy)<Horse >(Western)<Work dog >(Mystery, Thriller)<Small cat >(Romance)<Robot >(Sci-fi)<Anything I could play with >(Children)<None >(Horror)<

I’d live in the:

Past >(Romance, Western, Fantasy)<Present >(Horror, Thriller, Mystery, Children)<Future >(Sci-Fi)<

Alright, almost done! Total up your areas. Your highest score is where you live. If you’re tied, you choose. Now, for your sub-genre:

I enjoy reading:

Historical novels >If you got…Children or Thriller, add “Historical”Fantasy, add “Fairy” or “Middle Novel”Horror, add “Classic”Mystery, add “Noir” or “Who Dunnit”Romance or Western, add “Regency”Sci-Fi, add “Steampunk”<Modern novels >If you got…Children, Horror, Romance, Thriller, or Western add “Contemporary”Fantasy, add “Urban”Mystery, add “Cozy” or “Military”Sci-Fi, add “Futuristic”<

Last question…

I consider myself:

Old fashioned >(Historical)<Hip >(Modern)<

If this answer conflicts with your answer to the previous question, then take your 2nd place winner and add the appropriate sub-genre as listed above. If it’s a close second place, this is where you were born. If your first place was a clear winner, your second place is a place that fascinates you.

Feel free to share your results on your social media, and attach this post so people know what you’re talking about! I’d love to hear your results and thoughts on them!

If there’s a way to improve this quiz, please let me know. This is definitely not a concrete version.

To celebrate ONE MONTH until the release for “Don’t Dance with Death,” I thought I’d share the official cover and details on how it came to be!

As the finale of my Haunted Romance trilogy, the cover of “Don’t Dance with Death” went through the fewest iterations. It largely depended on the first and second books to make it a clear trilogy for the average scroller who’s judging my books based on their covers.

Back when “Don’t Date the Haunted” was terribly titled “Haunted Romance” (more about that here) and “Don’t Marry the Cursed” was “Haunted Adventure” (more about that here), book 3 was titled “Haunted Return.”

Each book focuses on a different character. Book 1 is Pansy’s book, book 2 is primarily Theo’s book, and (even though some of my alpha readers disagree) book 3 is Aeron’s book. I originally wanted a black background with a simple symbol to represent each character. So, book 1 was a pansy flower and blue-green aura, book 2 was a shield on fire, and . . . book 3 was a leather bracelet and smoke.

After I seriously considered creating my own covers…

Then I learned about the legibility of fonts…

As you’ll see, the main differences between each of these versions was the fonts. The third version of the third book had smoke and spokes like the first two, but wasn’t saved with the original file.

The first time I talked with Shaela Odd from Blue Water Books, she suggested a woman’s smirk for book 1. This directed me toward the idea of a man’s eyes overlooking a shield for book 2 and a child’s arm reaching toward the reader, wearing a leather bracelet for book 3.

I didn’t consider this idea long enough to create a mock copy.

When the idea of silhouettes and items behind their backs came along, I created Pansy, then Theo…then really struggled for Aeron. Apparently, I can’t draw kids even with the help of clip-art.

Oh man, I still cringe at the sight of my first attempt. I sent it to Shaela saying, “[This] is my failed attempt to outline the back of a 5 year-old boy (apparently, I can’t draw kids) wearing a leather bracelet and reaching up (as if holding hands between the silhouettes of Book 1 and 2).” Thankfully, I had a month to rework it and send her a couple different options.

The first one was a direct outline of a photo of a kid holding hands between parents. But he was facing the wrong direction, and I really wanted to include his leather bracelet, so I did a mock-up of him hiding it behind his back.

Shaela went with picture 3 and created THIS >>

I L-L-L-LOVE IT!

So, book 1 is mostly set in Romance, book 2 is mostly set in Fantasy…can you guess where book 3 takes place?
Highlight for Answer>>Pansy and Theo must rescue their son in HORROR! <<

For those who normally shun the genre, don’t worry. There’s still plenty of romance and humor to label it a Dark Romantic Comedy. This book is my way of proving that it’s not all blood and gore or violent sex (gross). There are some truly spiritual, stirring, and deep philosophical books in this genre. It’s also known for having a lot of light humor to combat the darkness.
And believe me, Theo’s perspective of this land sets me into giggles.

Anyway, I could go on about the misjudgments of genre, but for this post, here’s the climax:

I love that this arrangement makes Pansy look at Theo, Theo looks at Aeron, and Aeron’s looking back to Pansy.

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This book was brought up in my book club, but passed over until I brought it up again. Now, I have a complicated relationship with cozy mysteries. I’ve watched a lot of PI/detective/police series (Criminal Minds, Bones, Sherlock, The Rookie…), and I love the official consultant stories (Monk, White Collar, Castle, The Mentalist…). But cozy?

For those who don’t study genres like an English major/writer/editor, let me define the difference.
Cozy Mystery is a subgenre of the Crime genre. According to Shawn Coyne, cozies are

…told from the point of view of the amateur sleuth, who usually has some expertise that others lack that enables them to figure out the mystery.

– The Story Grid: What Good Editors Know

I’ve tried reading cozy mysteries before. Not only do they fail to keep my interest, but they straight-out irritate me when some little busybody–who has no authority to snoop around–puts their nose in the way of the cops. Even “Murder, She Wrote,” with Angela Lansbury, has a moment in most episodes (I’m currently in season 5) as the police look at JB Fletcher and ask “What are you doing here?” Then, she must explain her connection to the case to excuse and justify her involvement.

Rant over, I don’t love cozies . . . but I enjoyed “Death in the Park” enough to look up book 2.

Story and Characters

Sunni Taylor has a leg up over the neighborhood busy-bodies as she’s a journalist. She’s used to city life that’s always hopping, so when she moves to the small town of Firefly Junction, she feels over-qualified and bored to report on a quilting club. She moves into an old house with her sisters living on the same property. Sunni has a long-term goal of turning the main estate into a bed-and-breakfast inn, which is a lofty dream considering its crumbling condition and haunted resident.
That’s all long-game stuff that will likely stretch itself through the 13+ book series.

As for Book 1 specifically, it gets through the mandatory introductions to the many characters and different settings with tiny bits of intrigue by mentioning the haunted resident of the home.
The tough part about mysteries is they always have a large cast (more people to suspect), but Sunni has two dogs, sisters with families, house friends, co-workers, and cops to keep track of–outside the usual long list of suspects.

Unfortunately, even with the long list of suspects, I mentally pinned the killer (or at least the motive and reason for the killing) loooong before it was officially revealed . . . but maybe that was just me with my understanding of story-telling and red herrings.

Sunni still annoys the cops with her investigations and has an irrational desire to solve the crime before the police, but the irritation is turned into romantic banter as she and Detective Jackson flirt between their griping.

Cleanliness

The dirtiest part of this book was a reference to a love affair and some teenage boys peeping into the girl’s locker room. Limited swearing, and even the violence is fairly calm. It’s on par with “Murder, She Wrote,” which is TV PG.

Rating

Like I said, I get bored/annoyed with most cozy mysteries, but the hints of paranormal and romantic banter was enough to keep me interested. To anyone who enjoys clean murder mysteries, I highly recommend “Death in the Park: Firefly Junction.” *****4.8 stars*****

Rating: 5 out of 5.

PS. If you’re curious what Sunni’s tri-color border collies look like, they’re incredibly similar to my tri-color aussie.

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I came across this book when the author contacted me at WriteHive Conference. I had read the full-length version of Pansy’s shower rap (as shared in my Behind the Scenes of “Don’t Date the Haunted”) in their poetry open mic night, then he reached out to compliment my poem and share his interest in “Don’t Date the Haunted.” When he described how similar the concept was to his own books, I looked them up.

Characters

The main character is Harold (quickly renamed Hero), a teenage boy who’s transported to the fantasy world of Kingdom. There, he meets Planet (a pixie) and ventures to find five fairy tale princesses. With his knowledge of each princess through the fairy tales, he becomes an oracle of sorts to “predict” the future and explain what must be done to save the princesses.
However, Kingdom isn’t exactly the same. Little Red Riding Hood’s woodsman is cursed, Snow White doesn’t have a prince, and Cinderella’s kidnapped instead of locked away. Oh, and one of the other princesses is threatened by zombies.

Story

“Kingdom Come” is the first in a series, though it can easily stand alone. Enough happens that it almost feels like a trilogy of its own. Not only does it retell six fairy tales, but it continues the story as the princesses must fight for their world.

The magic system has both hard and soft elements. Fairy magic is very soft (all we know is Planet’s sister is much more powerful than Planet), but the magic of the princesses is strictly defined with what they can and can’t do. This is also seen in JRR Tolkien’s books as Gandalf’s magic is very loose, but the power of the ring is hard and defined.

Even though each of the princesses is a little stereotypical “perfect,” they do have little characteristics that set them apart from the others.

Cleanliness

The setting and concept of “Kingdom Come” is so similar to my book, “Don’t Marry the Cursed,” that I’ve actually suggested “Kingdom Come” to readers who get squeamish from my book. It plays with the same concept of a fantasy land where fairy tales are current events and the main character knows the “rules” to get through. If you love innocent fairy tales, “Kingdom Come” is for you. There’s no swearing and no sexual references (just kissing and discussions about appropriate public displays of affection between love interests). There are scenes of violence (these aren’t strictly the Disney versions of fairy tales), but all within low PG-13 range. “Kingdom Come” is perfect for any middle schooler (or older) who loves fairy tales and isn’t intimidated by a long book.

Rating

“Kingdom Come” was Jim Doran’s first book, and he admitted to me that his other books are better. I still enjoyed the characters as they all had appropriate flaws and strengths. The story dragged a little during the many travels, but I understand that was in part to explore every section of Kingdom. Otherwise, I enjoyed the tension and creative twists on the fairy tale retellings. In the end, I give it **** 4.5 Stars*****

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I was introduced to this book when working on a panel with the author at LTUE (Life the Universe, And Everything: a Sci-Fi/Fantasy conference). He reached out to me after the panel, saying he was interested in my book (which always flatters me). I likewise looked up his book with a personal fascination with anything set in England and steampunk themed. Add a little police work, a love pyramid (not just a triangle), and some magic, and you have my attention.

Story

We’ve seen the love triangle (been there, done with that), but “The Crimson Inkwell” takes it a step further and makes it a pyramid. Luella’s engaged to Byron (her publisher), but swoons for Edward (a detective who provides her stories), and is fascinated by Bram (her teacher in magic). Each man has definite reasons for Luella to love them, but also major flaws or reasons to stay away. To quote Laurey and Ado Annie,

Well, which one d’you like the best?
Whutever one I’m with.

– “Oklahoma,” the musical

I found “The Crimson Inkwell” pleasantly tricky to predict as I expected it to go one way and it took an alternative route. Ironically, the most predictable part of the story was the big “oh crap” moment, but that could be because I’m a skeptic and know all will go wrong when characters say they’ll be done with magic after “one last time.”

The magic system is one I haven’t seen before. Anyone can use the magical artifacts, but they work like an addiction. While the positive effects are obvious and immediate, the negative effects are slow and growing. There isn’t a lot explained about it in the first book, though based on the set up for book 2, I assume it goes deeper.

Speaking of book 2, this book can be a stand-alone, but there’s a main hole to lead into the next book. By the title, it’s listed not only as the first book in The Luella Winthrop Trilogy, but also A Gaslamp Trinkets Novel. So, there will be the trilogy about Luella (two of three books already released), but I wonder if there will be more books based in this same alternate and magical history? I would be a-okay with that.

Cleanliness

Set in historical England, you have the regency standards of a Proper Romance. There’s some kissing, but the most scandalous part is Luella going into a man’s tent (to do magic, not romance). Kenneth Baldwin does a fairly good job of writing a woman’s perspective who’s professional and gets frustrated with the fact that she’s frustrated. It was only in the moments as Luella wandered into questionable places by herself where I recognized the male author.
Dude, women who value their safety and pure reputations don’t do that.

Otherwise, very low PG-13 rating for some violence and lots of suspense (supernatural, social, romantic, countdown…).

Rating

In the end, it surprised me multiple times as the characters acted on their own and the plot twisted appropriately. I enjoyed it and was eager to jump into book 2. *****4.9 Stars*****

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A.I. Winters is a new author with a YA supernatural adventure series, and her new book, “Summoner of Sleep,” is a straight up genre-horror, adult cautionary tale.

Cautionary Tale:
noun. A story that gives a warning.

Cambridge Dictionary

In other words, don’t expect a happy ending.

If you love to see the evil side of botany, but “Little Shop of Horrors” was too light-hearted for you, this book is for you.
If you love genetically modified dystopias, but “Brave New World” had too much sex, this book is for you.
If you love straight horror with all its suspense, monsters, and gore, this book is for you.

Characters

As for many horror books, the “heroes” have more flaws than virtues. “Summoner of Sleep” starts off from the perspective of Ryder, a lawyer who had nothing growing up, gained everything he could have ever wanted, then lost it all because of his night terrors of clocks.

As we see Ryder fall apart, we learn of Claude, Ryder’s next-door neighbor. He’s retired and tired of waking up every night from Ryder’s screams. So, he investigates in a tonic called the Summoner of Sleep. Unfortunately, anything so much as a whiff of the stuff (not to mention the mere research of it) drives a person crazy and into the mountains where the plant is grown.

That’s where we meet Mary, a third generation resident of Marble Woods (the small village where Summoner of Sleep is made). She’s been exposed to “Summoner of Sleep,” but is one of the few to largely resist the drug.

Story

The plot is heavy with intrigue, leading the reader to ask what’s going on, why, and how’s it going to stop? Answers only lead to more questions. Even when you think it’s all been explained, you’re only half-way through the excavation of discovery.

Most of the story revolves around botany, going into the different uses of plants, how they’re alive, and how they seem to have minds of their own. “Summoner of Sleep” takes it one step further that the main plant of interest is part demon and can bless people with youth, strength, and healing…at the price of their soul.

There’s a romance subplot which is (thankfully) innocent. Ryder’s recently separated from his wife and catches Mary’s attention, and Claude has a woman he’s fond of. There’s one scene of a monster failing to woo a woman, but the couple on-screen kisses are simple and without detail.
Highlight for Vague Spoiler >> I’m not a fan of the method Mary uses to gain Ryder’s affections, but after finishing the story, I theorize they were ineffective anyway.<<
As for other sensitive areas…

Vulgarity

I almost stopped reading after the first F-bomb in chapter 1. I counted 8 F-bombs through the book, plus several droppings of other 4-letter words and names in vain.

As a genre-horror, I expected blood in every chapter, and “Summoner of Sleep” delivers with a side of agony. The bloodiness and fantasy violence is on the level with “Demon Slayer: Mugen Train” (average people will rate it R, but those accustomed to the genre will say it’s TV-14).

Rating

It wasn’t my personal cup of favorite hot chocolate, but “Summoner of Sleep” did a decent job at what it set out to do. A.I. Winters has clean syntax and very few proof edit issues (much better than I can say for most beta-reads). My initial thoughts were to rate it at 3.5 stars, but that was entirely for personal reasons (I’m sensitive to excessive swears and gore, I wanted something lighthearted to break the tension every once in a while, and I forgot that it was a cautionary tale, so I was surprised by the abrupt ending).

Putting aside my personal judgements, I put it at a solid ****4 stars****
The novel was interesting, surprising, and good at creeping me out. However, it had a few character holes and some transitions between scenes were abrupt.

Rating: 4 out of 5.

“Summoner of Sleep,” by A.I. Winters will be released July 1st.

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It’s taken me a while to gather my thoughts on Michaelbrent Collings’ newest book. It felt more like a thriller than a horror to me–even though there’s graphic violence in every chapter, including a slaughter in a frat house. Maybe it was all the suits and sunglasses.

Seriously, I started singing “I wear my sunglasses at night” in the middle of reading.

“Synchronicity” revolves around the idea of psychic and telekinetic powers, so don’t expect to understand what’s going on until it’s thoroughly described (which it is…eventually).

Characters

The story is told through the “lenses” of three main characters:
Tyler “Book” Malcolm: a man who has “booked” away from situations and people all his life…and has a little psychic help.
Kane: a man who uses The Machine to mentally overpower people and literally become that person. He’s also ridiculously strong, ridiculously insane, and has no moral compass.
Jade: the good(?) version of Kane–or at least the pretty version–and isn’t chaotic evil like Kane. She follows a leader.
Which brings me to the secondary character, Axel. Book’s tale is fairly simple and arcs well, but it’s actually Axel’s backstory that feeds depth to this novel.

Story

So, when Book catches Kane’s eye (and thereby Jade and Axel’s attention), Book’s in more trouble than ever. He’s soon caught up in the secret invention of the SINC (AKA the Machine) that lets him mentally take over other people…at the price of their life.
With a serial story of my own about body-switching, I found this concept particularly fascinating.

Despite their telekinesis, the protagonists are very human and very flawed. While they’re all heroes to their own stories, they’re also all villains to each other…mostly.

Vulgarity

As mentioned earlier, there’s a slow massacre of an entire frat house and some graphic violence in every chapter. There’s also some swearing, but no f-bombs, and a few sexual references. Solidly within PG-13 range.

Still, this felt more like a thriller than a horror–not just because of the suits and sunglasses. There are a couple bomb explosions and even a car chase. Rather than working on fear of fear itself or terror of the unknown, “Synchronicity” themes around the fear of getting caught.

Final Rating

As with most sci-fi/super-power stuff, there’s a lot of time spent talking and explaining the tech and powers, which can seem dry. The ending also went in favor of “crazy twist” over continuity, so I can’t say this is my favorite of Collings’ books. Still, those were my only issues, so I give it ****4.3 stars****.

Rating: 4.5 out of 5.

As for future installments of Book’s story . . . I found this posted on the author’s Facebook.

I’m seriously starting to consider doing an Avengers team-up with a book starring Legion (The Stranger series), John Doe (This Darkness Light), and [Book]…
Spoiler: they will NOT like each other.

At least not at first.

– Michaelbrent Collings

I actually read “This Darkness Light” after reading this post because I enjoy Legion that much and anyone who could possibly team up with Legion must be interesting. (In case you missed them, here are my reviews for “Stranger Still” and “Stranger Danger”).
I’m really not sure how John Doe would fit into the mix after he completely apocalypsed his world, but I can definitely see Legion and Book . . . interacting. To say they’ll “get along” is a stretch, so I’m very curious to see how a team-up would work.

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Confession:
I don’t love Jane Austen books.

Yes, I’m a woman who secretly loves romance books and I have my bachelors in English, so I’ve read and studied multiple Jane Austen books. I’ve even visited London and Bath to see some of her original works and settings.
I respect Jane Austen a lot. She was a pioneering woman who helped define the “novel,” who wrote her way to independency, and who crafted stories with rounded main characters and pointed remarks on her society.

But did I cry at the sight of her writing desk, like the girl right next to me?
No.
Call it a personal “prejudice” against books of the Romantic Era, I just can’t handle the syntax and over-flowery language. Give me the poems of the Lake District or Cockney School where they kept their stories short, because–seriously–how can they say so many words that mean so little!

Also, there are few characters that are actually likable in Austen’s stories. Everyone else just makes me want to scream.

That brings us to “Pride and Poor Judgement,” by J. Anne Campanile.

Story and Characters

In short: it’s a gender-bent contemporary retelling of “Pride and Prejudice,” from Darcy’s (the girl’s) perspective.
Darcy’s a high school girl with a best girl friend named Charlie, and Elizabeth becomes Elliot–a high school boy with an older brother named John.

“Pride and Poor Judgement” keeps all the brilliance of “Pride and Prejudice,”–such as the insane plot and character twists and well-developed main characters–but leaves out all the annoying flowery language and unnecessary characters that just make you want to strangle society. Oh, don’t worry, you still have Collins, Lydia, and Wickham.

And it’s not EXACTLY the same plot as the original. There are a couple twists to help the story fit into today’s society and to fully flush out Darcy’s side of the story. I think the change of perspectives was the most creative part about “Pride and Poor Judgement.” We see a new side to the story from Darcy’s perspective as the author explores exactly why she acts the way she does around Elliot.

Cleanliness

Borderline PG-PG13. There’s some passionate kissing, minimal swearing, and a few sexual references (but no more than a few, and no more than references). Nothing a middle or high schooler wouldn’t already be too familiar with.

Final Rating

Well-written for a debut novel, I’m more likely to pick up this one over the classic. ****4.7 stars*****

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“This. Book.” To quote the Acknowledgement page of “Don’t Marry the Cursed,” “I started to write ‘Haunted Fantasy’ Oct. 18, 2016. One year and ten days later, I had three-hundred-fifty pages of D&D/Tolkien fantasy. Oops.”

It took me four years to polish “Don’t Marry the Cursed” into what it is now. I’m not saying it’s perfect, but I can say I’m proud of it.

I created this to set beside my desk when working on the final edits of “Don’t Marry the Cursed.”

Now, if you haven’t read “Don’t Marry the Cursed” or its prerequisite “Don’t Date the Haunted,” please read them both before jumping into this post.

I’m not asking just to get you read my books, but as a fair warning: SPOILERS AHEAD.

Alright, I’m going to roll on, supposing you’ve read both books and were dying to know how they came to be, you’ve also read the Behind the Scenes posts for “Don’t Date the Haunted,” starting with the deleted prologue through Chapter 20.

When I first wrote “Haunted Fantasy” back in 2016-7, Margen (the Grimm’s/English folklore side of Fairy [tale], Fantasy, AKA: Theo’s homeland) didn’t exist. This is because I wasn’t planning to write a sequel until after I finished the first draft of the first book. When I began writing the sequel to “Don’t Date the Haunted,” all I had was a vague idea that Theo was nobility (a Count in the first few drafts) in a Fantasy land called Argall (a Cornish surname, meaning “shelter, quiet place”).

As I explored Argall a little more, I discovered Theo’s castle/home called Ruestatte within the city of Eimat, and the cities of Afen and Divinity.

Argall Duchy

Oh, and Duke Konrad was spelled as Conrad,
Godiva (Di) was named Jehanne,
Dunstan was named Emmanuel,
Oswald was named Orem, and
Duchess Abadda was Konrad’s dead stepmom, as Queen Abadda.

Abadda was always the big bad villain that overwhelmed the assumed big bad (Oswald). However, when she was dead the whole book until she was restored (Voldemort style) by Oswald at the end of the book, I needed to explain more about her from the beginning.

Thus, the prologue.

I wrote it as one of the last pieces to pull the whole story together, so (like most fairy tales) it began with “Once upon a time,” and was written with third-person omniscient, but focused around Prince Conrad. Before using “The Juniper Tree” as their backstory, Prince Conrad and his elder sister, Alóvera, fought against the wicked ruling of their stepmother, Abadda. Conrad fought in silence and secrets while Alóvera fought openly, becoming banished to Middle Novel, where she befriended dwarves (met Sir Sayer–AKA: future husband), and used their alliance to build an army.

He squirmed in their tight grasps, but he was surrounded on each side. The prince knew he could escape if he transformed into a horse, but he was strategic and thought to analyze his captors further.
Another dwarf who was younger than the others came forward.  He stared the prince in the eyes and didn’t speak for a full minute.  Finally, he rumbled with a deep voice, “Where do your allegiances lie?”
The prince, being brave and honest, said, “To Fairy.”
The dwarf hardened his eyes, suspicious of the prince’s vague response.
“Queen Abadda rules Fairy,” the dwarf said.  “Who rules your heart?”
Prince Conrad’s determination didn’t waver.  “I do,” he said. “I am Crown Prince of this land and will lead it as my heart dictates.”
The men in the room grimaced and the dwarves scoffed.
“Queen Abadda will not let you rule.  She will live and rule forever.”
Carefully gaging the expressions of his captors, the prince spat, “Long live Queen Abadda.”  He read the allegiances of the overall group and continued, “To live long doesn’t mean to live forever.  One day, she will die, and I will take the throne and right the wrongs of this land.”

. . . . .

“You said the queen will one day die,” [Alóvera] said, “and you will right the wrongs of this land.  I sought you today to tell you that day is soon. These men,” she gestured around the room, “will follow my lead to vanquish Evil Queen Abadda.  There will be two sides in this battle: that for the queen, and that for me. I don’t want to discourage you from following the rule of your own heart, but I must ask;  who will you follow in this battle?”
At first, this frustrated the prince.  All these years, he stayed and suffered under the queen’s rule, gaining her trust, earning her pride.  All these years he obeyed her evil commands and plotted in secret.
Then he remembered the moment when she exiled Alóvera. He remembered his anger against the queen, but mostly the fear that kept him back.  Then during all those years of planning he kept quiet. Even as he considered battling his stepmother, fear gripped him.
Then he realized he didn’t need to be face to face against his step-mother.  He could let his sister shoulder that weight, even if it meant he lost the greater reward.  She was the elder sister and the right was hers after all, especially if she fought for it.
Prince Conrad made his decision and knelt before his sister, “I will not merely follow you, Princess Alóvera.  I will be your steed to carry you forward.”
Prince Conrad transformed into…an Andalusian Destrier. The dwarves and men around him jumped back as he reared on his hind legs and released a battle cry whinny.

-Very terrible Fairy Tale-style prologue

When Abadda became Theo’s living stepmother instead, my next issue was to explain why Theo spent the last six years in Romance. At this time, he was the eldest son and heir to the duchy, so I needed a reason for him to be away from his inheritance.

I went so far as to consider giving Theo a curse that turned him into a beast when he stepped on Fantasy soil.
Enter the scene with Queen Alóvera discovering Theo’s new monster-state:

“How did this happen?” she asked.  There was a hint of anger in her hushed whisper.
“The Duchess,” I croaked, “brought me here, granted a wish by my eighteenth birthday.  She encouraged me to wish for strength.  Not in so few words.  She implied and encouraged me to be strong like Greggory and Dunstan.  I am their elder brother, and heir to the duchy.  Should I not be strong and capable as they?  Do you think she knew this would happen?”

Second terrible prologue

She then encouraged him to leave Fantasy, because (unlike abilities) magic/curses aren’t as strong outside of Fantasy.
That led to the first chapter of Theo’s proposal happening at the Fantasy embassy and going like this:

“Would you love me if I was a haunting?” he asked.
“I would, but I’d have to kill you.  Condemnation, I can hardly imagine doing such a thing.”
“What if I just looked like a Haunting?”
“Like a mirage or illusion?” I asked.
“Yes, like a curse or spell that changed my physical features, though my mind and heart remained the same.”
I shrugged, “Then I’d need to know more about the curse, but killing the witch who cursed you, not you, would be my gut response.”
“Would you still love me?”
His insistence that I answered the question worried me.  Where was this conversation headed?  “Yes,” I said.  “You’re a good man, Theo.  I’d love you even if you looked like a haunting.”
He released a heavy breath then stepped back.
“I would love you too my flower.  I’m afraid though.  Can I trust you with my terrible secret?”
Panic gripped me as I wondered what secret Theo kept from me.
“Pansy…I have a curse.”
“You don’t look cursed.”
“I have my godmother, the queen, to thank for that.  My curse is only in effect whilst I stand on Fantasy soil.”
My mind raced at his words and their implications.  “That’s why you never visit Fantasy?  Even during school breaks?”
He nodded.  “Truth Locke reviewed my curse and said the cure required either True Love’s kiss or a ritual with a pure maiden in Eimade.  I came here after our first kiss to confirm.  The curse still afflicts me, so it must be the latter.”
“A ritual?  Like with a sacrifice?”
“No,” he chuckled nervously.  “A wedding.”
He took my hand in his and went down to one knee.
. . . . .
But he said it didn’t change his heart or mind, only his physical appearance.  “I’ve already decided,” I said, “but…will you let me see you?”
Theo took a sharp intake of breath, then steeled himself as he stood.  With two large steps, his feet landed onto fantasy soil.
He shuddered, like he had a chill, but continued to shiver as his skin rippled.  As much as he tried to restrain his cries, strangled moans still escaped his lips.  Spikes grew from his skin like needles around his blue-green eyes.  They branched with dark brown feathers.  The skin around his nose and mouth pulled back to reveal a transforming jawbone.  It smoothened then lengthened to a sharp point.  His entire head reshaped into that of a brown-tinted raven.
The rest of his body didn’t follow.  His arms bulked with muscles and grew longer than a normal human’s.  The skin turned to a dark gray before it became covered with thick fur.  His back hunched over so he went down on all fours, but his extra long gorilla arms held him up.  His legs also transformed in a completely different manner.  His knees bent backwards and his ankles lifted until they stood high off the ground.  Toes became solid hooves and a long tail of hair sprouted from his rear.
It was the most bizarre combination of beasts I’d ever seen.
“You already decided?” Theo’s voice squawked from the chimaera of a creature.
Every bit of Horror in my body said to run.  It said to run away and hope this vision didn’t haunt me every night for the rest of my dreams.
I forced myself to stand still.  Then the small parts of me that were influenced by Romance leaked through.  The raven had Theo’s blue-green eyes.  They also cried.
My desire to comfort the owner of Theo’s eyes overwhelmed my Horror instincts and fears.  I stepped toward the creature, but stayed far enough away that I could dodge an attack.  He didn’t move other than to shudder with sobs.
“Theo?”
“Yes, it is I,” the creature said, refusing to meet my gaze.  I stepped in again, within its range.  The back of my mind worried about that giant beak that could easily snap my head off, and those massive arms that could squeeze or pulverize me in an instant.  With shaking fingers, I reached up and placed my hand on the raven’s cheek, below Theo’s blue-green eyes.  Finally, his eyes met mine.
“Never before have I shown someone on Romance my true nature,” he cried.
I focused on his eyes, the only part that remained of the man I loved.  “This isn’t your true form.  This is only a curse, right?”
Slowly, he nodded.
“You are a man, and a gentle one.  You embody the definition of a gentleman,” I choked on a laugh that came out as half sob.  Why was I crying?  “Do you still love me?”
“Yes!” the raven cawed.  “I love you and nothing could change that!”
I smiled behind my tears.  “Then my answer hasn’t changed either.  I want to marry you, Theo.”
He blinked a couple times, as if doubting the reality of my words.  “Truly?”
“Truly,” I laughed.  “Now transform back so I can kiss you properly.”
He laughed too and with a heave of his gorilla arms, lunged himself back to Romantic soil.  Feather and fur shed to the floor and the man I knew and loved stood before me again, grinning.  He swept me off my feet.  Holding me tightly, I pressed my lips to his and he spun me around.

Despite the Romanticism of it all, this concept didn’t last even a full draft. I tried beginning with a letter from Di (asking Theo to come home), and wrote a different scene of Truth telling Theo that he was needed in Margen. Nothing seemed right.

Eventually, all my research on fairy tales paid off.

“Noble personages may be brought low by fairy enchantment, or by human beastliness, but the lowly are seldom made noble.”

– Iona and Peter Opie, “The Classic Fairy Tales”
(one of my university capstone textbooks)

All fairy tale princesses (including Cinderella) were all princesses before they were tried and tested. Adventures were thrust on heroes or complete happenstance. Theo needed to fall into his inheritance by accident.
So, I made him the discarded second son (who wasn’t as important as the first), at least until Greggory died.

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