Jon Acuff's Blog, page 180

The build up on this video is slow but it has everything you've ever wanted in an online video. Zach Galifianakis? Check. The Muppets? Check. The band OK Go? Check. I thought this was hilarous.

If you asked me last week if I had anything in common with Twilight star Robert Pattinson, I would have said, "Yes, we're both bipeds, we have hair that borders on Conan O'Brien height levels and we're constantly harassed by lycanthropes."

That last one is a stretch, but the other night we did see a bird attack a huge bug in a mid air battle. When we looked at the bug I told my wife, "I don't want to alarm you but that looks an awful like the scarabs from the movie 'the Mummy,' starring...

Last week, I told my wife that it would be appropriate, dare I say "loving" of her to get me an iPad for Father's Day. Her response? She laughed. It wasn't a mean laugh, it was more of a giggle that seemed to say, "An iPad? That is adorable. Should I buy it with one of our offshore Cayman Islands bank accounts Lord Featherton?"

Needless to say, I did not receive an iPad for Father's Day, but I did have a great weekend … until a reader named John Harris exposed a church-flavored Father's Day...

The end of "Lost" has created a sermon illustration vacuum. Pastors and church members across the country are staring into the gaping maw of this sermon illustration void with concern and trepidation.

But fear not, if Braveheart, Gladiator and the Matrix taught us anything, it's that summer movies often provide the greatest sermon illustrations ever.

Let's review what our options are:

Twilight: Eclipse

One night while I was speaking, a handful of girls got up in the middle and left to go see...

Come hang out with not 1, not 2, not 3, but all 4 Acuffs.

That's right, the whole Acuff family will be at the Buckhead Barnes & Noble on Tuesday, June 22 at 7PM.

We will be giving away tons of Booty, God, Booty buttons and … one of the Jon Acuff cardboard cut outs, which I warn you is terrifying to come home to in a dark house.

Here is the address of the store: 2900 Peachtree Road NE Suite 310, Atlanta, GA 30305, 404-261-7747

Here's the link to learn more. Come hang out!

Universal Pictures doesn't know it, but I'm writing a sequel to "Newsies." It's going to be called "Newsies 2: Revenge of Crutchy." And it's going to star Zac Efron.

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You doubt me, but I've already talked to a few studios about a Stuff Christians Like movie. And eventually my Newsies 2 idea is going to grow like Kudzu. (Regional vegetation reference. It's about education. I believe that children are the future, teach them well and let them lead the way.)

But even if Universal ignores my SCL...

I want to, want to be crazy about the World Cup.

Seriously, my desire to actually desire the World Cup is off the charts.

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I'm not sure anyone else on the planet wishes they were into the World Cup more than me. I grew up playing soccer. I think it's a beautiful game. I wish our country shut down like other countries on the day our team played. The Brazilian player Kaka is wildly open about his love of Christ and a blast to watch. There's no doubt that I would love to be caught up in the...

Is there anything better than hamsters wearing hoodies and dancing to the Black Sheep's "The Choice is Yours?" I'm not sure there is.

I could watch an hour long version of this video. I have so many questions. Why are some hamsters wearing pants and some aren't? Is the drummer on drugs? In the hamster world, are the transportation options really a cardboard box, a washing machine, a toaster or a Kia Soul? Man oh man, this is fantastic.

My first attempts at getting a job in Atlanta were a parade of colorful failures. I sent out dozens of resumes with no response. I flew from Boston one day for the sole purpose of meeting with an executive who ultimately refused to even accept my resume. He wouldn't take it from me. He literally shot blocked me at breakfast.

And then something incredibly awkward happened.

While living in Massachusetts I would occasionally come down to Atlanta to talk with companies. One afternoon I did that...

I don't know Matt Redman, the singer of Blessed Be Your Name, but I have to imagine he's somewhere right now wearing solid gold pants, riding an Arabian horse named Montalban on the sandy shores of the Grand Caymans.

That's if he gets paid per time a church uses his song, because if there's ever been a stuff Christians like, it's that song.

But I think some people are getting tired of it. I love that song and don't think for a second it has jumped the dolphin (That's a nicer, churchier version ...