Sarah Price's Blog, page 17

Dear Sarah,

My question if you have a passion, how do you know if you have a talent for it? What has been your experience with coming to realize you were gifted and talented in writing. You said you only had a small support group. You went on and found your talent after horrific odds. Were you able to reproduce what your ex-husband threw away?

Marian Ann J.

Hi Marian!

Thank you for posting this question the other day on my video! (and no, the birds did not take my tiara…ha ha).

First, regarding knowing if you are talented in your passion. There is a great book called 10,000 Hours by Malcolm Gladwell. In the book, Gladwell talks about how it takes 10,000 of practice to become “great” at something. I believe that this holds true for so many things: dancing, singing, acting, painting, writing. Not every is born with natural talent. Maybe some people are. But, for the most part, we have to practice.

Let’s check out the math:

What this chart states is that if I only practice one hour a day, seven days a week, it will take 27+ years to reach the 10,000 mark. If I practice 10 hours per day, it will take just under three years. Typically, people fall somewhere in-between (unless it is one of my kids when I used to try to get then to play a musical instrument in which case it would have taken either one of them 192 years to learn how to play the violin).

So, that is the first start. If you start tackling your passion by practicing, you can be assured that you will improve. No debate there. And, if you have an innate talent, the time will definitely diminish quickly.

But, as I stated in a previous letter to Julia C. who asked about writing and publishing books, just because you are talented doesn’t mean you will be a success. Just watch those talent reality shows. For every person who makes it to the stage, there are 10,000+ people who tried out. And think about all of the talented singers or actors who try out but are passed over.

Does that make them any less talented?

How about actors or actresses that are horrible actors? How did they make it to the big screen when other talented people did not? I suspect that comes from knowing people or being in the right spot at the right time.

The bottom line is that if we have a passion for something and are talented, we will keep doing what we love. If we have a passion for it and are not talented, we will keep doing what we love. Anyone who follows their passion with the sole purpose of being the best or the most successful or the highest paid…well, that’s not really their passion, is it?

God rewards us for following our hearts, not our focus on prideful things like money or status or capturing the limelight. Look at how many celebrities HAVE achieved big money and celebrity status but are unhappy. Drugs, divorce, lawsuits, financial ruin, etc. Of course, not all celebrities face that but there sure are a lot of them, aren’t there?

BTW, I tend to write between 35 and 50 hours a week. Since I’ve been writing for years and years (and years and years), I hit 10,000 long ago. But I still practice. I still research. I still study. I will never be able to know enough to make me truly feel that I am “talented.” I’m constantly surprised when people write that they love my books, characters, writing, settings. Even if they didn’t, I’d still be writing.

Dear Sarah,

I want to write books and publish them. I like science fiction and have lots of ideas to create a sub-world of creatures. My parents don’t really support my efforts or encourage me. How do I find a publisher? What advice do you have for me?

Julia C.

[letter edited for brevity]

Dear Julia,

Ooooo! A fellow writer!

Maybe you know this already, but I started writing when I was about eight years old. I loved to write and tell stories even then. At first, I wrote in notebooks (I LOVE LOVE LOVE moleskins). Sometimes my family would read them, but my handwriting was really messy and the stories weren’t necessarily well-written. I was, after all, just a kid.

I don’t know how old you are but I say GO FOR IT. Maybe this first attempt is not going to be your break-out best seller. But the more you write, the better you will become.

Additionally, you must read. A LOT. Surround yourself with books that are similar to what you want to write. Study the way the authors write. Underline, highlight, keep a journal (MOLESKIN).

As for your parents, the more you write and show it to them, the more they will realize that you are serious. Very serious.

In regard to publishing, that’s an easy one. When I was growing up, we didn’t have the Internet (just in case you are younger, I had to toss that in). I had to buy the Writer’s Market book each year and type query letters to send to agents and publishers that accepted direct queries. Those days are gone.

Amazon.com offers wonderful self-publishing options. However, a word of warning. Just because you post a well-written and well edited manuscript on Amazon does not mean it will sell. You need to market the book to your audience and that is very, very time consuming. Even if you have the best book in the world, if people don’t know about it or feel compelled to purchase it, it will just sit on the virtual book shelf, languishing with really poor rankings.

You must have a strategy on how to reach your audience. Fortunately, there are tons of websites online that can give you information on how to do that. Be selective in what you do. You need to stay true to yourself. In other words, do not do marketing “gimmicks” or try to buy LIKES/FOLLOWERS/REVIEWS.

That will not help you, but hurt you.

Dear Sarah,

I love your positive energy on your Morning videos. You asked for people to contact you so I thought I would ask if you were always so positive and energetic? I want to be like that.

Lily P.

[letter edited for brevity]

Dear Lily,

Noooooooo. Not at all. To be perfectly forthcoming, I began suffering from severe depression right after I had my first baby and it’s been a tough battle ever since. I was living in a household that was not happy thanks to someone (not me or the baby, obviously) dealing with a severe substance abuse problem which was partnered up with verbal, emotional, and financial abuse. Later, I found out that there was gambling going on, too.

For me, the turnaround was realizing that I did not have to live that way. It’s easy to say “Walk away,” but it isn’t easy to do. I wasn’t an enabler. In fact, I made it very, very public that things were going on at home. Rapidly, I learned that many people don’t really want you to answer the question “How are you doing?”…not honestly, anyway.

So, surrounding myself with good, positive, supportive people is the first step to getting and staying positive.

Removing toxic people, even family and friends, from my life was essential to finding a place where happiness could grow.

I read my Bible a lot, too. I love Proverbs and Ecclesiastes. Those are my go-to books in the Bible when I’m feeling down. When I was diagnosed with breast cancer, I realized that God has a plan for me that I cannot determine. He chose me for some reason and I will not question that. Never ask Why me? Only God knows his reasons. Sometimes he shares them with us, but on his time, not ours.

I believe happiness is a mindset. In order to find it…to achieve it…we have to realize that, ultimately, no one else can make us happy. Nor can things make us happy.

As for energy…yes. I’ve always been high energy, even when I’m tired. Force yourself to do what you really want to do. Don’t make excuses for why you shouldn’t do it.

Hugs and blessings,

Sarah

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I am so excited about my latest book, Into the Amish! I’ve teamed up with my good friend Erin Brady to create this romantic comedy. Erin is a HILARIOUS writer and she came up with this idea a LONNNNG time ago. Early readers have sent me emails letting me know how much they loved Emily’s journey to Lancaster, Pennsylvania. That makes me so happy!

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Disappointment. That’s a really hard word to swallow.

I am disappointed because yesterday was the high school graduation ceremony and my son did not attend—by his choice. In fact, I only just learned THIS morning that he graduated high school at all!

There are so many factors that contribute to this situation: from the two boy bullies at a local country club who mocked my son’s extra girth at swim practice– he still refuses to go to the pool (badly done, Jack H. and Stevie S., badly done indeed) to his lifelong “bestest” of best friends who turned his back on my son when he needed help the most—something my son never did to him. In my world, when the going gets tough, the tough fight hard…not disappear for more socially acceptable people who can provide upward social mobility instead of helping a friend through the harsh realities of life.

So my son found another “bestest” of best friends, M., who I adored. His friend was funny, witty, a little James Deanish…and ultimately the worst of trouble.

When I was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2013, everything fell apart. My son who was in all Honors classes with almost straight As and an amazing baseball player as well as a poetic football star disappeared. Left in his place was a stranger.

I always wanted a little boy just like Calvin in Calvin and Hobbes. God gave me just what I wanted. He was colicky, grumbling, moody, very active, even more physical, and the love of my life.

But life changed a lot of things and today, I am disappointed. But all of that was stolen away from me with the help of Jack, Stevie, M., and that other boy. They stole his self-esteem and, with it, my Calvin.

Yes, yes. I know. It’s all about choices. Back then, my son did not have a choice. But today, my son does: shape up or ship out. He has chosen to ship out and I’m dealing with that. I can only pray that he reaches bottom and somehow climbs back up. In my dreams, he becomes a raging success…like Joseph…and Jack, M. and that bestest of best friend have to come to him begging for grain.

My son, the one in my dreams, will give them grain and embrace them (well, maybe not Jack…he was never a nice boy).

Last night, two hours before my online book discussion, we ran out to dinner with an out-of-town couple (delightful people from Ohio, btw) and while I waited for everyone to arrive, the waitress commented that it was high school graduation night. My heart sank and I became upset and angry: angry at Jack and his mother with their Facebook graduation pictures, so happy yet completely oblivious to how Jack’s bullying and horrid comments started what M. finished; bitter at the supposedly happy photo of a robed M. with his parents who continue to pretend that everything is just peachy-perfect on their Facebook graduation pictures.

Now that high school is officially over, I’m stuck dealing with the “what now?”

Last summer, I arranged for my Calvin to attend my alma mater, Drew University, a very reputable liberal arts school that is not easy to get accepted. Someone else pulled the plug on that one. Now, he’s maybe going to a community college which, while a good education, lacks the prestige that parents fling around about their next-best-college-to-Harvard that their child is going to. In fact, whenever I mention that my son is accepted at the community college (a place I once taught, btw), I see their expression change as they nod their head and say, “There’s nothing wrong with that.” Really? Then why do they say that?

So those boys might have graduated and are now moving onto new phases of their lives, but their sons helped steal the future that I wanted for my son.

As a Christian, I should forgive then seven times seventy, right? As a human, I cannot.

I’ll never have that graduation photo standing next to my Calvin. I’ll never feel the tears of joy seeing him in that maroon robe walking to get his diploma. I’ll never have those four years back. They are gone…lost…

Lost.

Ironic. So apparently is he.

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Tell us a little about yourself and how you got started writing.

I wish I could say I always wanted to be a writer. That sounds so purposeful, but when I was young, all I ever wanted to do was be a mommy. I played with dolls until junior high, and even then, I only put them away because I was embarrassed. But once I grew up and fulfilled my dream of motherhood, I had lots of time on my hands during late night feedings, and I ended up reading a lot. It was at that time I began to think about writing a book of my own.

However, just because I read books didn’t mean I knew how to write them, and it took many re-writes for me to figure that out. So I read craft books, attended seminars, and got bajillions of critiques from other writers. Gradually my confidence and skill grew, and my second dream, that of being a writer, finally began to come true.

Do you have a favorite character from this story? Why is this character your favorite?

Clyde Felton, the hero of Jilted, is precious in this book even though he’s tough. Clyde is so tall he bumps his head on doorways, and he’s so broad he can barely get through the door in the first place. His size, coupled with his curly pony-tail and scruffy beard, make him intimidating, even to those who don’t know he spent twenty years in prison. (For statutory rape, no less.) But in spite of all that, Clyde is a sweetheart. All those years in prison were spent reading tattered books from the prison library while he yearned to get home to Trapp, Texas. Now that he’s back, he’s taken an interest in Lynda Turner, an old friend, and he’s going out of his way to gently help her heal from her own past.

How did you decide on the setting/location for this novel?

Jilted is set in West Texas, in the fictitious town of Trapp. I grew up visiting my grandparents on their ranch in that region, and that’s where I learned about Mesquite trees, jackrabbits, and rattle snakes … all of which make an appearance in the Mended Hearts series. Even though I never called West Texas home, I lived in a small town during my high school years, and that’s where I learned the nuances of the setting for Jilted.

How does it feel to be at the end of a 3 book series such as yours?

It feels wonderful! Even though I’ve greatly enjoyed getting to know all the townspeople in Trapp while I worked on the Mended Hearts series, I’m ready to move on and create a bookful of new characters. And besides that, I love the feeling of having completed something. I’m a list person. I make a list for EVERYTHING, and then I check things off my list, and when everything is checked-off, I’m extra happy and content. So at this point, everything is checked-off the Mended Hearts series, and I’m one satisfied writer.

What books are on your nightstand?

I read most books on my kindle which leaves my nightstand fairly clear, but a friend recently loaned me a copy of Interrupted, by Jen Hatmaker. Okay, so it’s been next to my bed for over a year, but I really, really planning to read it … eventually. I absolutely loved 7: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess, so when I get around to it, I’ll probably love Interrupted just as much. As for my kindle, I’m currently reading Big Little Lies, by Liane Moriarty. I also have an antique copy of A Tale of Two Cities on my bedside table, along with two volumes from James Fennimore Cooper’s Works, but they’re just for decoration. If I ever decide to read Dickens or Cooper, I’ll download them onto my kindle and save the wear and tear on the antiques, but I love seeing them there every day.

A heartbroken woman desires to move beyond old memories, but will her past give way to hope?

Lynda Turner has struggled with depression since her husband abandoned her and their young daughter fifteen years ago. Yet unexpected hope awakens when a local ex-convict shows interest. As long-hidden secrets resurface, Lynda must fight for her emotional stability and for a life in which the shadow of shame is replaced by the light of love.

Jilted tells of a woman who has lost the joy of living, of a man determined to draw her back toward happiness, and of a town that must—once and for all-leave the past where it belongs. It is a gentle reminder that all things can work together for good.

Varina Denman writes stories about the unique struggles women face. Her three-book Mended Hearts series, which revolves around church hurt, is a compelling blend of women’s fiction and inspirational romance. A native Texan, Varina lives near Fort Worth with her husband and five mostly grown children. Her passion is helping others make peace with their life situations.

Connect with Varina on her website or one of the social media hangouts.

Purchase link: http://varinadenman.com/where-to-buy

The post An Interview with Varina Denman, Author of Jilted appeared first on Sarah Price.

Did you ever feel an overwhelming urge to escape? To disappear somewhere and, along with you, all of your worries? I have … many, many times, in fact. I have always pictured my escape this way: I’d walk right out of my office at work, down the elevator, onto the sidewalk, hail a cab, head for the airport and take the next flight to a remote island; an island with plenty of sun, a warm breeze, a soft, long beach lined with palm trees and no Wi-Fi (well, maybe Wi-Fi. I do need to read and follow my favorite celebrity tweets, after all!). Or, better yet, I’d fly over to Scotland and find a circle of standing stones, twirl at its center and hopefully land somewhere in the 18th century with a handsome Highlander (can you tell I’ve been watching too many episodes of Outlander?). Of course, the urge will pass quickly and I’ll realize what a blessed life I have and I won’t catch that flight (sigh … Jaime will have to exist only in my dreams), but you get the idea.

Sometimes, life can be so overwhelming that you feel the need to get away from it all, if only for five minutes, an hour, a day or sometimes, even longer.

That is exactly the predicament the main character of my latest novel, “Into the Amish,” finds herself in. On the surface, Emily Lawson seems to have it all-the perfect job, the perfect apartment and of course, the perfect boyfriend. But, as we know all too well (especially if you’ve read or seen enough romantic comedies), not everything is ever as it seems. For Emily, life takes an unexpected turn and it throws her into turmoil. Gone is the perfect world she thought she was living in. She feels lost and confused. If only she could find a quiet place to gather her thoughts and work out her problems? Cue in a very helpful mother, a trip to Lancaster, some long-lost Amish cousins and voila: you have a story. A story I hope you’ll enjoy because in all honesty, this book was incredibly fun to write and for so many reasons!

First, I really was able to identify with Emily’s predicaments. Life is messy and, sometimes, we need a time out from it. And yes, it’s okay to not always know where we are heading. After all, we don’t always have everything figured out and sometimes, the voyage is more important than the final destination. Second, while I may be a city girl, I do have a little bit of country in me. Perhaps even more than just a little bit. In fact, didn’t I grow up spending most of my summers living among the cows and the chickens and absolutely loving it? These are the fondest memories of my childhood. So, the fact that I was able to go back to my happy place while writing this book was an added bonus!

Thirdly, I was able to find out so much about the Amish and learned such a great deal about these people, which I came to appreciate and admire through the eyes and life experiences of my co-author, that I had to share their story with you. Like me, you will love the closeness of the community and the strong ties of faith and family that are the core values they abide by in their daily lives. So much so that, just like me, you’ll be soon planning a visit to Lancaster County yourself.

But lastly, and most importantly, I had the opportunity to write this book with my good friend, Sarah Price, whom I adore. I’m not sure whether or not many of her fans realize what a wonderful sense of humor Sarah has. She’s funny in a “laugh-out-loud, belly laugh” kind of way. She has great comedic timing; so much so that bringing this story to life came much easier than any other book I’ve ever written. We laughed so much in the months we spent collaborating with each other that I miss it now. Hint, hint, Sarah … do I hear a sequel?

Erin

Click here to pre-order Into the Amish!

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My husband insisted we plant a vegetable garden this year. It makes me laugh a little because he doesn’t eat vegetables. I mean, he eats corn and potatoes, but do those really count? They are starches, right? Anyway, he wanted me to have fresh veggies. We made it easy and only planted tomatoes and peppers. He did all of work. Isn’t that sweet? He won’t get any benefits of the garden, but he took the time to till the dirt, plant the vegetables, and water the garden.

I married well, I’m telling you.

Anyway, yesterday I was out on our little patio and saw one tiny green tomato. I think we have six plants and out of all of them, there is one lone tomato. Instead of being discouraged that there was just one, do you know what I felt? Totally happiness. When he got home, I took him out to the garden to show him our baby green tomato.

Soon the garden will be overflowing with red ripe tomatoes, as long as we keep watering and weeding it. We may even (definitely will) have an overabundance. But, it will have all started with that one tiny tomato that I spotted last night.

I think sometimes we get caught up in end results. We want everything right now. It’s hard to wait through the growth process. But, we need to remember that all things have a beginning. We have to start somewhere. Celebrating the little accomplishments are important. Quit judging yourself for your “lack of’s”—lack of faith, lack of devotion, lack of joy…whatever it may be.

Did you get up this morning and spend time reading your Bible? There is your tiny green tomato! You have a start! Now, continue to do that every day. Add in prayer time. When you worry, start asking Jesus to take your worry from you. Begin to trust. Weed out the things that will choke your growth. Quit concentrating on the negative. Change your thinking. You can’t expect to have a mature faith in God, a strong Christian walk, without starting with those first steps. It takes work and nurturing. But, if you stick with it, you will soon find yourself overflowing in God’s goodness—so much so that you will have enough to share with others.

“To achieve this, you will need to add virtue to your faith, and then knowledge to your virtue; to knowledge, add discipline; to discipline, add endurance; to endurance, add godliness; to godliness, add affection for others as sisters and brothers; and to affection, at last, add love. For if you possess these traits and multiply them, then you will never be ineffective or unproductive in your relationship with our Lord Jesus the Anointed;” 2 Peter 1:5-8 The Voice.

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Ever feel like you need a week alone?

I’m there. It’s like a soul craving. A longing.

If I could, I would reserve a lake house with a deck. I would wake up early and sit on the deck. Just God, me, the lake, and the rest of His creation. I would listen to the happy sound of the birds and feel the breeze blow through my hair. I would just sit there and breathe in life.

Because sometimes life doesn’t feel like life. Do you know what I mean? Sometime life—living–feels like work. It feels hard. It feels overwhelming.

So, if I could, that is what I would do.

But, we can’t always have what we want, right? So, this morning I am getting myself up. I’m taking a deep breath. I’m getting ready for church. And, do you know what I’m going to do?

I’m going to breathe in Jesus—the Giver of Life. I’m going to let Him wash over and through me. I’m going to allow Him to refresh and renew my spirit.

Sometimes life just feels like too much. In those moments, I think we need to step back from our circumstances and step into Jesus. We have to allow Him to bring peace and calm into our lives.

Sending you all hugs today.

With Love,

Lisa

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Those first steps. They are so scary! Terrifying even. What if I fall? What if I mess up? What if I embarrass myself?

What if–what if– what if…

It starts so young. The first little baby steps. At first we held on to the edge of the couch or coffee table. Or, we wrapped our little dimply hands around a grown-up’s finger as they led us in front of them. Eventually, we ventured out on our own taking those tiny tiptoe steps. (Or if you were like my oldest, you waved your hands in the air like a monkey. LOL. That was so adorable.) Anyway, our first attempts at walking were only the beginning of many, many, MANY firsts.

Over the last three years or so, God has been asking me to make some major changes in my life. To say He has wanted me to step out of my box would be putting it mildly. I feel like He has asked me to take off into another galaxy. I am basically an introvert. As an adult, I’ve been fine with my little close knit world. I’ve had one or two close friends, my husband, and my children. I’ve been good with pulling out of the garage, going to work, pulling back in the garage, shutting the door, and living a quiet private life.

But.

God.

God started saying things like:

“I want you to join some groups and talk to people you don’t know”

“I don’t like strangers though.”

“I want you start writing devotions.”

“1. I can’t write. 2. I don’t have enough education, knowledge, spirituality, or desire.”

“I want you blog.”

“Ok. No. Nope. That is too personal. No one wants to hear about me or my thoughts. They’ll think I’m stupid. People who know me will judge me. No thanks.”

“I want you to speak.”

“ABSOLUTELY NOT. No. NO. NOOOOOOOOO. Nope. Not gonna do it. (covers ears) I didn’t even hear that. There is no way. I will fall flat on my face. I’m not a public speaker. I might be able to write thoughts, but to convey them orally? No. You don’t need me to speak. You’ve already got my dad, my mom, my aunt, my uncle, my cousins, my brother–you don’t need me. That is not my thing. Thank you, but, no.”

“We’ll see.”

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