Sally Hanan's Blog, page 14

Of all the things that cripple people from being all they can be, expectation is the worst.

Expectation is very different to hope, because it usually sets a standard to be attained that is nigh impossible to reach–one that says that you must the brightest, the best, the shiniest at that thing you want to do.

And with that mindset, it also usually means that when you inspect your level of work, talent, and success, you tell yourself what you are doing is not good enough so you should quit.

You’re probably already sick of people talking about 2019 and how it should be, but please listen up–

It’s OKAY to just be okay at something.

The world is full of talented, shiny, bright people. You’re one of them. How many artists, actors, writers, scientists, teachers, software developers, health professionals, coffee baristas do you know of? How many would you know of if they had the mentality that they should quit because they couldn’t be the #1 star of their industry?

So this year please do the world a favor. Accept that being okay is enough, because you’re doing your thing in your own unique way and bringing your flavor of passion to the world. That’s enough. That’s a good thing, The world needs you as you are. There’s plenty of time to get better at your “thing,” plenty of time to shine more, but for right now relax, enjoy, and do your thing with joy so that this jigsaw of life can be turned into the full picture it’s designed to be with you as one of its crucial pieces.

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When the Bible talks about Jesus making a way for us, it’s not talking about a path similar to the one a child makes by kicking his Legos off a thin bit of carpet to his bed. Nor is it talking about clearing the weeds to form a winding path and putting down some mulch so we don’t get our feet muddy.

No.

 Jesus has made a way for us to live in the very heart of the Father.

And when he laid down his life for us, he cleared every path, every field, every obstacle in the universe that would prevent us from running freely and fully into love himself.

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Just because something feels true in your head doesn’t make it true.

If you think you’re stupid and it feels true, it doesn’t mean it’s true.

The thought no one could ever love you doesn’t make it true.

The thought that you’ll be in survival mode forever doesn’t make it true.

What’s true is that we have seasons for everything, and we move into them and out of them into the next ones throughout life. Some are filled with love and health, some are filled with sadness and despair. Carry hope during the harder seasons so that when the new one shows its face, you’ll recognize it and be ready to jump in and enjoy it fully.

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Have you let the vision for your life blur? Ask yourself when the last times were that you felt fully alive and see what the commonalities are in those moments. For some, it’s time with friends. For others, it’s travel, and for others, a good book.

We all need moments to inspire us and steep us in joy. Life isn’t about the things we do as much as the moments in which we fully live.

Write down everything you think others expect of you. If you feel like you can talk to them honestly, ask them to go over the list with you to see where you might have been off. You’ll most likely find that all they really want is for you to feel fulfilled and loved, and to be honest, we should live our own lives, not the lives we think our friends want.
What kind of life do you want to create for yourself? Who do you want to include in it?
Feeling stuck is good because it gives you a yearning to get out of the rut. Life always moves forward, and no one wants to stay on the same mountaintop for years anyway. There are many other mountains with equally gorgeous views waiting to be seen.

In summary, life sometimes feels dead when we overthink it. Moments of my own life story are created every day when I know what I’m passionate about and I look for ways to serve that up to those around me. You have a lot to give in your very unique way, so think about everyone you know and ask yourself the same questions:

What do I love to do and what can I do well, and how can I serve that up to enhance other people’s lives?

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Have you thought about giving up on life?

It’s quite possible that shutting down, avoiding, and dissociation are what got you to the point you’re at now, and if so, ask yourself this: Have any of those behaviors given you any happiness?

Let’s assume the answer is no.

And that’s because in order to really live, you have to experience life in all its moments.

Once you’ve got in to the habit of shutting down, it’s nigh impossible to come alive when life is good. You’ve set your default switch to barely present. How can you possibly enjoy life when you’re living in a nonexistent state?

My suggestion is to learn how to actually live by doing some or all of the following things each day:

Be fully aware in every moment.
Be willing to process fear or pain in every moment it arises.
Quit anything that stops you from feeling—alcohol, weed, TV shows—anything that pulls you out of having to interact with life.
Make a point of being thankful for every single little thing of beauty—a cloud, laughter, a warm bed, hot food.
See other people’s hearts rather than their facial and physical reactions.
See your own heart rather than your facial and physical reactions and start enjoying your unique way of being you.
Thank people all the time—phone support people, cashiers, friends, family. Tell people they’re amazing when they help. Thank them when they’re kind. Point out every good thing you see in them.

When you’ve done that for a few months, you’ll find that your new perspective will have changed your life rather than allowing what you see of life to change you.

And that’s when you get to truly start living.

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A woman I know in a very friend-of-a-friend way shared an encounter she had at the age of fifteen, and I imagined it played out like this:

I was sprawled across the sheets, all the stringy arms and legs of a fifteen-year-old who thought she was fat, and could feel it in the air. Some thing was in my room. I let my eyeballs move to my right while I kept my body rigid, straight as the backs of the chairs in Sunday school, and felt my lungs swoosh in the cold room‘s air. Hairs sprang up on the tops of my arms, standing to attention in stiff formation.

I was looking at a being filled with light that reached the ceiling. Hair the color of sunflowers. A long dress sequined in gold that radiated internal light rather than outer, and a cape that rushed from her shoulders to the floor in satin-like waves. A face with soft lines. Eyes that looked at me and through every cell I was made up of and saw everything.

An angel. In my room.

Her cape touched the covers on my bed and instantly I felt a charge of power radiate down and then back up my body—so filled with fire I thought I was going to die. I closed my eyes so tightly, I could swear I was cutting off their blood supply.

 

Our Father,

Who art in heaven,

Hallowed be they name…

 

It was the only prayer I had ever memorized. The only words that could make it to my lips that I thought would save me.

And then I opened one eye very slowly. The angel was gone. My bedroom was back to normal.

Yet it never was again.

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If you can’t hear God’s response on something that’s important to you — and no matter what anyone says, you still want solid confirmation that you should move forward or stay safe (an illusion, if ever there was one) — the closest thing you’ll get to hearing God is hearing him speak through your inner circle of friends. That’s where you will always find massive amounts of peace, love, joy, wisdom and creativity — because Jesus is alive in them and they will speak creative life into you.

I’d make sure, though, that you pick your Spirit-filled advisory team from each personality type and not just people who think like you. Have at least

one engineer—a never-do-anything-without-a-detailed-plan introvert;
one excited, take-a-risk-at-all-times extrovert;
one sensitive please-don’t-ever-ask-me-my-opinion introvert; and
one bossy here’s-what-you-should-do-and-you-have-to-do-it-right-NOW extrovert.

That way you are guaranteed to get almost every question and answer, every pro and con, and every facet of God presented for you to peruse.

When my husband and I were debating moving to the US, we asked a room full of trusted friends about it, and they all agreed that it was God’s idea. His Spirit in them confirmed what we weren’t sure we were hearing. And here we are. 

The post Indecision – Finding Wisdom appeared first on Pick Your Life .

God’s main gift to us is not our personal happiness; it’s that we get to be an integral part of the bigger plan—to give life and give it abundantly. That includes what we learn by pushing past our fears and tasting all life has to give. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.

It’s the same with moving forward and climbing out of the slough you’re in. Either way, it’s time to move.

You don’t have to grow everything at once. It took Jesus three years to give his disciples some wisdom and understanding. It took Boaz years to find a good wife, and even then, God had to practically push her in his face to get him to notice her. Accomplish small things that move you further along the road toward realizing a fuller, more life-filled life. Just get on with it and forget about a timeline unless God’s given you a specific one.

God believes in you. I believe in you. Now get cracking!

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If it’s time to make a decision and everyone around you is telling you it’s not such a great idea, but all you do if fire back all the reasons why it is, it usually means it’s a terrible idea.

If it’s time to make a decision and you know deep in your heart that it’s a bad idea but it all makes perfect sense in your head, it’s still a terrible idea.

If it’s time to make a decision that will make someone you love happy but you know it’s not a good decision, it’s probably a terrible idea.

Summary: Avoid choosing the terrible idea. 

Some thoughts for people who are overweight :

If you think you look like a beached whale, you might be over-exaggerating just a tad…

If people keep asking you if you’re pregnant, be thankful that all that delicious food went straight to your belly and not more practical things like your hands or feet. That’d be like trying to eat a chocolate meringue with boxing gloves on.

If you don’t love your body now, you won’t love it when you’re thin either.

A bigger belly usually just means you like sugar more than the average bear, which makes you extra sweet.

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