Julia, aged 18
As a teenager, I was typically awkward and lacking in confidence. Wearing NHS specs, and being a girly swot didn’t help. My mother used to say: “You’re no better or worse then anyone else.” ie. Don’t waste time comparing yourself to others. It took me YEARS to see she was right.



But one day, while at university, I met an old school friend. I say friend. I had admired her from afar throughout my school days, assuming she would never be interested in me. To my astonishment I discovered that far from being in control and confident as I had fondly imagined, she had gone through the same wretched self hating process that I had.





Julia and her twin sister
It was then that I realised that it’s the same for everyone. No matter how old we are. No matter how we project ourselves: with confidence or without. We are all at heart that same scared unconfident teen. Discovering this was liberating, and gave me a confidence I’d hitherto lacked.



Julia and her best friends c 1982
Now I tell my girls when they stress about friends being prettier, cleverer, more popular, that it’s the same for them too.



I don’t expect they’ll believe me till they’re grown up, either.



www.juliawilliamsauthor.com

http://maniacmum.blogspot.com