I realize that for this daily experiment to work I’m going to break a lot of social media for authors “rules.” There’s a point where you draw the line and don’t tell readers things. There’s a surface information zone, like I have kids and I live in Dallas and stuff like that. Then there’s the more personal stuff, the majority of my life, that doesn’t get published online.

So, I thought I’d break the ice and tell you guys stuff, because honestly, I’m probably going to ramble. And then you’re probably going to get lost without the background. So, here’s a bit about me. If you’d like, you can share in the comments about yourself.

1. Suzan Butler is not my real name. You can Google and find it out pretty quickly. I don’t make it a secret. But I don’t advertise it either. It’s my experience though that it’s pretty common with romance writers to have a pen name. It gives us a little bit of privacy or at least the screen of privacy. Because anyone with a little bit of intelligence can find out the information they want.

2. I left my husband eight years ago. I still remember the night. My brother’s then girlfriend took me out for my birthday. We drank a lot. In the span of the first two hours, my husband called me 53 times. I only know that because that’s how many missed calls I had before i finally turned off the phone. It was probably more. Over the next few hours, my would-be sister-in-law sat there and we drank and she laid out every possible reason why I was married to an asshat. It worked. I left my husband that night.

3. I’m completely selfish with these blogs. They say that you should keep your reader in mind when you blog, but these posts? All for me. It’s a step out of my comfort zone. It’s a way for me to process what I’m going through and to learn how to be more open and happier.

4. I may from time to time say things that I haven’t told my own friends. The reasoning behind this is simple in my head. There are some things that one just can’t vocalize. i have a hard time talking about what I feel. I bottle it up and push it away and it builds and builds and it just one day boils over. So that’s another function here. My friends all joke with me about how I’m angry and I hate hugs.

The truth is… I don’t hate hugs. I love them. But they’re something awkward about them for me. Maybe it’s just me pushing people away for so long. I don’t know. I am angry though. I’m not a happy person. I have rage built up inside that I’ve never gotten out. I should have done therapy after my divorce, but I couldn’t afford it. I still can’t. Instead, I have pushed away all these people in my life. I’ve made it a point to not get close to people. Love is something that I couldn’t afford, because I was absolutely burned.

5. There’s something broken in me. So if you don’t know me personally, hold on to your hats. Because by the end of it, we’ll be besties. I plan on sharing a lot as I kick my life into gear. I invisioned this experiement I thought it would be a very firm, outside look at me getting my life together. 365 Days to get my act together, to be independent.

I realize now that this was naive of me. Because a big part of this transformation in my life is going to be mental. I’m having to change the way I think in order to change the way I live.

6. This really isn’t about my divorce. Well, it kind of is, because I’ve been slowly spiraling down from it. But it’s about me, the way that I’ve changed because of it, changing who I am now, and keeping myself accountable and giving myself the guts to do things that I wouldn’t normally do.

Sometimes, I’ll talk about goals. Other times, I may whine. Its going to be a roller coaster, because that’s where I am right now. I’ll have other content here and there, because one can only take so much of a person’s whines and tribulations. I’m staying open to guest bloggers, because I like doing them, even though not a lot of people want to come and play here. That’s okay. I like my house on the web.

I think I’ve said enough for today. The rest–and there is a lot–will come when it’s time to share, when it can carry enough weight for me to justify it for the world to see.  I hope you’ll follow along.