I find it funny that I have to look at all my posts in order to remember what day I’m on… I’m so scatterbrained. Except for when I’m procrastinating.

I can find just about anything to do when I have to do something else. In fact, this blog post is a procrastination right now, because I still have 50 pages of edits to do, a submission to send off, and lots of homework to do. Yet here I am, blogging.

I don’t know what it is about me that makes me do it. They aren’t particularly laborious tasks. But I just don’t want to do them. So that’s where I’m at this morning.

Yesterday was interesting. I got two full requests on two different books, neither of which is ready IMO. And the funny thing is that I’m currently editing the Christmas novella, which is neither of those. So now I’m faced with having to finish both books in a short amount of time. One isn’t too hard. It’s line edits, proofing, before I send for submission. THe other is a beast, a complete rewrite. The novella is a self-pub project, but it’s kind of time sensitive, being a Christmas novella and all.

So it’s a little overwhelming, which makes me want to procrastinate. Okay, it’s a lot overwhelming. It seems like every thing happens all at once, good or bad, and I’m left wondering the rest of the year about what’s going on. Most probably think I’m nuts for not being ecstatic by this news. I am, but I’m also afraid that I won’t get it done.

I don’t know if being overwhelmed is causing this depressive mood I’m in or if the depressive mood is causing me to be overwhelmed. I think that it’s likely to be both. I think that they might be playing off each other. I have noticed a change in the last week since I started this blogging experiment. I’m not feeling as burdened. I don’t feel as tired.

But my focus isn’t there yet. I’m kind of flighty at the moment, jumping from thing to thing. Even this morning, this post has taken me over an hour, because I keep flipping over to other web pages, and checking my email, and I’m struggling to stay awake this morning, which is odd because I actually went to bed at a decent hour.

This focus thing is my next obstacle I want to tackle. I don’t have it and I need it. If I want to make a career for myself, with writing, or with design, then I have to develop some kind of focus. Right now, I’m stuck in procrastination mode, and that’s just not going to work. I can’t be a successful business person if I can’t finish the things I have on my plate.

Now that it’s taken me nearly an hour and a half to write 500 words, I’m officially declaring today’s post a bust. Tomorrow’s will be better, I promise. But now it’s time for me to run along and make today’s list of stuff to do and get to work.